#i know he's been gifed many times better than me BUT i had to!!!!

[ebongrove]

[hickeys-dickey]

Pls share your thoughts about the gays in THAT scene… I would love to read them!

Ahh you are too kind, I am but a little swiss cheese brain but I'll try my best to sum up my thoughts, I have too many! I wanted a chance to grab some screenshots too! I'm going to put a read more because this is a long one buckle up lads.

So obviously the whole punishment for Hickey is designed to humiliate him (I would imagine this is one of the reasons his punishment isn't explained to him, because if Hickey truly was a naval petty officer he would know, and I think it's another way for Crozier to essentially say "I see you" and not in a good way). The fact we're not shown the other whippings shows the importance lies in the scene with Hickey.

I've seen a bit of discussion about his charge of "dirtiness", which isn't listed initially when we see him being questioned by the Captains, and whether or not it alludes to homosexuality but on a quick cursory search it does seem to have been used as a euphemism where an outright accusation of sodomy would mean a death sentence. The way Crozier throws it out there, no doubt to heap the humiliation onto Hickey and add crimes to the list to cover the fact he added lashes on to the punishment essentially for a bruised ego (but that's another matter), suggests a whole lot of venom to the accusation. Hickey's pointed look at Irving and Irving's quick shift of his gaze down suggests they both know exactly why Crozier has listed this among Hickey's list of crimes, and Hickey looks furious for it.

But I think this is also ultimately where the panic begins to set in. Again, there are far greater minds than me who have made excellent posts about queer coded characters in the terror, and I think it's no surprise that most of them are the faces that are focused on in this scence. It is clear long before this moment that Crozier's leadership is lacking, and people have already begun to voice concerns fairly loudly. Tozer for one is livid in the wake of Heather being injured, and the marines have clearly started distancing themselves from both the officers and the men. I feel like this scene, for a lot of characters is a point of major shift in either allegiences or character.

Tozer and the Captains are the first faces that are panned to in this scene and I think the expressions speak for themselves.

Tozer is visibly upset/concerned after the first lash. I do think guilt probably has a part to play, in that is was him whole told Hickey where Silna was, and presumably approved enough of the plan to not rat him out to anyone. Again, very probably part of Tozer's anger at Heather being injured due to what he sees is Crozier's poor management. Fitzjames is stoney faced, but is also the only one looking. As a man who many have noted pushes himself to pick emotional scabs, I think it would make sense for someone who is also notably queer coded and stuggles with trauma to make himself look directly at someone being whipped for a crime he himself might commit. Crozier isn't even looking, whether out of suddenly doubting his harshness or simply triggering something in his own memory it's not clear. I think the end of this shot also speaks for itself.

(Fig 1. Three Concerned (very likely not straight) men contemplate)

The lads at the back behind Mr. Johnson are all looking Directly At the whipping as it is taking place. Interestingly none of the men at the front near the table are looking. This is the stewards, officers, and marines. Whether out of respect or also Concern at their own skins (I think every one of these characters has been addressed as being queer coded at some point, minus the marines who are all, except Tozer, fairly nameless characters).

I'm not a gifmaker which is unfortunate for this section, though this is what is gifed in the beautiful gifset by sashneeka I reblogged (x). Tommy is also visibly upset, whether because he knows Tozer was involved in the plot to kidnap Silna and is concerned for him and any of the rest of the crew who had assisted in someway or voiced support. Billy interestingly does look briefly, and sets his jaw after in a way that suggests he's trying to fight the guilt of being the one to tell Irving about the whole affair with Hickey to paint himself in a better light. It could just as easily be Billy there on that table being lashed, but he somehow rationalises it in his head (probably because Hickey is a little bastard) that he was right in what he did. He does look down fairly guiltily after this, so maybe he hasn't quite settled on an opinion. Jopson also looks incredibly concerned/unsettled, and interestingly looks at Hickey right up until the whip hits where he flinches, and not for the only time in this scene. From what we know about Jopson's past, though not at this point, it may well be he is remembering similar punishment/mistreatment and like Fitzjames looks enough to pick the scab open and flinch from his own trauma.

The closeup of Hickey shows the full extent of his rage and humiliation building, and as I think Adam himself said, they whipped something out of Hickey that day and let him reach this potential that lay inside him (to become an even bigger bastard). He's fully severed all ties and feelings of loyalty after this and it becomes full on train to manipulation station from this point. I have a lot of Thoughts about Hickey also (which I am sure you are all aware of) but I think there was some semblance of Hickey attempting to start afresh on this journey, or at the very least keep his head down and go unnoticed. The trouble is, he notices Crozier as a flawed man, and one not from the upper classes like himself, and his ego can't help but think we're not so different, that could be me with the right connections. Well surprise lads, its murder time now and he's gonna make this old man pay for not recognising initiative but punishing it. I do wonder if Crozier wasn't booze sick and rattled from losing even more men under his command, would he not have come down so harshly for someone clearly defying the Articles to do what he thinks is right and save the men (a la Crozier and his fuck you I'm directly contradicting an order and leading this rescue party myself).

Tozer gets another wee closeup here and again looks like he has resolved something in his head too. Most likely that he thinks Crozier an unfit leader, and admiring Hickey for having the balls to do what he did (Hickey also never reveals anyone else who came with him, and when he talks about Hartnell and Mason's part in taking Silna it highlights their skill and bravery and (he thinks) commends them to the Captain. It's probably the only time we see him building up and applauding others). He looks dead ahead here and seems to have a very steely gaze, like yep fuck it looks like I'm going it alone now. It is interesting that Tozer goes from this to notably disliking Hickey (both at the start and when they are packing up - "you've just given me an excuse to give a big shove". This might be anger at Hickey having caused all the issues with Silna after the fact when Heather gets killed at Carnivale), but still follows him in the end. Hickey has the ability to kill, manipulate, steal, basically do whatever needed for their group to get ahead, which means Tozer can be part of the group and not have to dirty his own hands. I think Tozer probably has a complicated relationship with Hickey, but he does fall for the charm hook, line, and sinker, and the fact he seems concerned for him here suggests how easily he is sympathetic to those he sees as being wronged.

Gibby getting Hickey's blood on his hand (ayy) seems to visibly make him blanch, and I do find it interesting that the shot then pans to Tommy as though they are looking at each other when they are stood side by side. The similarities between them maybe? (I've seen and reblogged a lot of discourse about Tommy loving Tozer, maybe another nod to no one being so different to the man on the table?) Irving doesn't get much of a close up in the rest of this scene but bless him he looks equal parts terrified and guilty (another man who has been noted as having a list of many things to distract from the Gay Thoughts like why do you need to distract from Gay Thoughts Irving?). He also has the Far Off Look of trauma about him, probably because he too could just as easily be on that table.

I have many many thoughts about the way Hickey turns to look (and fucking smile???) at Crozier next, which is when Crozier is looking directly at him and Fitzjames looks at him. Like if I were Crozier I think my fucking blood would chill, look at this man. Being humiliated and lashed still hasn't broken him, if anything he has just become fully unhinged and looks at Crozier as though to say "did you really think this would work?". I would also say, this man has fairly quite for someone who is at this stage something like 22 lashes in? Like what the actual fuck Hickey?? I fully belive Hickey to be a psycopath, and most of what he does in the beginning of the series is an attempt to stay hidden until they get to Hawaii and he can ditch the crew, but I think it is fairly safe to say he isn't hiding it any more.

And he knows this is going to make the men doubt Crozier - I can't do a proper search because I am using my work laptop atm, but I seem to remember reading that a punishment greater than 12 lashes required a court martial (probably why Little steps in to say so when Crozier orders his punishment as well as them technically being lost at sea), which would be another strike against him as a Captain. Not only that, but Crozier does seem to grant him some mercy in letting him only be lashed I think 23 or so times? Probably because the tension is fucking palpable in this whole scene and Crozier can either choose to claw back some sense of control on the matter, or deal with the consequences of many people admiring Hickey for what he has done for the crew and start a mutiny. I think this is the first time Fitzjames sees the damage Crozier is doing to himself with his choices as Captain, and is probably just as concerned at the look Hickey is giving him. He knows this has unleashed something in this tiny rat bastard too, and that he will become the physical manifestation of Crozier's self-destructive tendancies. Crozier perpetually comes to everything just a fraction too late to change anything - he never saves any of the men, only comforts them as they die, and a lot of this has to do with his own ego and bad decision making, and I think this is the first example here of the fact his actions are having an effect on others to the point it will be his downfall.

Anyway, to round it off, I think this scene really epitomises the notion that Hickey is a mirror to the rest of the men, and they see their flaws in him. Those who have questioned Crozier's captaincy look concernced knowing they too could be being lashed. They too would have tried to get Silna to stop the Tuunbaq hunting them. Those who are queer or queer coded know they too could be being lashed for it. Crozier himself sees his unwillingness to follow the Articles in him, sees his own insubordination, and feels what Sir John meant when he said his position afforded him deference. Hickey may as well be a metaphor for all the men being lashed, theres not one among them who haven't voiced wanting to do what he has done. Let them without sin and all that. This is make or break for who holds loyalty to the Captain, and the turning point for who is going where. I think everyone except Jopson, Irving and Fitzjames ends up in the mutineers camp, and Irving ends up killed and mutilated by Hickey and Fitzjames is scavanged by them. Theres not one of them that isn't haunted by what happened in this scene, and Hickey would end up being the death of every single one of them. The only one who remains loyal after this is Jopson, who thinks his care and duty to the Captain can outweigh his other sins. Fitzjames and Crozier have a stronger relationship once he recovers from his withdrawal, yes, but Fitzjames also keeps him in check now (I'm thinking of Edward Little being threatened with flogging again because of course I am), and it is another step too late for Crozier's self-destruction. I've seen a Hickey/Fitzjames Christ analogy on here before too, so I hope you'll forgive me in comparing them, but Hickey in this scene really does get punished for everyone else's crimes in this scene, and becomes a sort of Christ-like figure, reborn as a complete version of the worst of himself from the pain of being lashed. They whipped something out of him!! Anyway, that about sums it up!

[normal-thoughts-official]

Polycule ask: who gives who flowers? Besides Mel ofc giving their partners really lovely and meaningful ones. I’m mostly saying this bc I adore the idea of Maia’s partners just... showering her in beautiful and lively things. Also because I feel in my heart of hearts that Simon’s train of thought about Raphael is: hm. He’s old fashioned and likes nice things, but I wouldn’t know what to buy him. I want to court him (someone, mb Izzy or Maia: court?? Why are you talking like that)... flowers! :)

POLYCULE ASK! POLYCULE ASK! POLYCULE ASK! god i’ve missed those!! it’s been a while aaaaaaaaa and i lOVE this one im so excited!!! YES!!

ok so first of all yes meliorn like u said always gives them flowers, and they always get meliorn flowers as well because they know this means a lot in seelie culture so it’s always a nice gife/expression of love for her :)

i also have the headcanon that meliorn gets some flowers for taki’s, which idk if counts as Giving Her Partners Flowers, but i think it’s a cute touch that helps her be a part of taki’s considering she’s less in their realm than the others and doesn’t visit as much. also, she gets the most beautiful, sunny, wonderful flowers for them and they always fit the ambiance so well and it’s really nice :) they aso always have faint but good smells that both maia and raphael can appreciate and that won’t get in the way of their sensory issues and that are also allergy-proof because MAGIC okay. like it’s just :’) wonderful

and you are CORRECT, all the flowers for maia!!! i have particularly soft images of izzy getting maia flowers kind of awkwardly because this is not something she’s really done before except for meliorn, which was easier because she knows seelie flower language so all she had to do was put together a meaning and BAM! done. but for maia she has to make a Pretty Arrangement without having a sorta... meaning chart to go by or something, so that feels weirder somehow?? and she’s kind of lost and probably gets to maia’s all sheepish in a way that’s very uncharacteristic of her with roses and shit (she went to alec for help because they are that kind of siblings and alec is a traditional man so roses it was. also she will be teased FOREVER because of that, which is only fair considering how much she got on his ass). the bouquet is probably too big and maia laughs when she sees it but izzy has that huge smile and looks at her with those big imploring eyes of her like “do you like it?” tilting her head you know, and maia smiles and is like “yeah, i like it, you nerd” and izzy absolutely beams at her

but also!!!!!! simon!!!!!!! and i’ll get to simon getting raphael flowers in a second because boy i do love that image but SIMON GETTING MAIA FLOWERS okay. it’s probably a spur of the moment thing like he went past a flower shop and saw something pretty (im picturing yellow flowers just because...... maia in yellow.... the way it would POP on her and she would look so amazing and gorgeous and lively and just PERFECT ugh) and bought it on impulse so now he’s seeing her in their date that was probably like a movie date or something, you know, definitely not customary to bring flowers to those, and maia laughs and is like “what is this? we came here to watch the new star wars” and he’s like “yeah i know but i saw those on the way and just... thought of you” and she smiles and says “that’s pretty cute” and they kiss and it’s SOFT

also picturing he takes it to her at taki’s or something and raphael teases him like “what, none for me?” and he gets all flustered you know like “sorry i just uh i just saw those and i thought of maia, you know, because yellow suits her so well, and i didn’t think that uh, i didn’t stop to look at others for you, but i probably should have-” and raphael laughs like “simon, relax, you can save the flowers for another time” and simon is like “so you do want flowers! okay good!” and maia just giggles as she places her flowers somewhere safe at their anticts. GOD I LOVE SAIAPHAEL SO MUCH IT’S UNREAL

and of course raphael!!! raphael gets them all flowers. he is that guy. absolutely. he likes to Court. personalized bouquet arrangements he puts a lot of thought into, honestly. i mean of course with meliorn there’s flower language for even for maia and simon he just... he likes to pick something that he thinks suits/represents them even if he’s just going by Vibe. he is that guy who gets them flowers and gets behind them and shows them the petals and shit and like

for maia i’m picturing daylilies so he’s just... he gets behind her and she’s already touching the petals delicately kind of in awe because daylilies are pretty and he’s like “see this? they are fiery. vibrant. intense, but delicate. like you” and she smiles and he goes, “but you know what i like the most about daylilies? they attract butterflies.” and he pauses as she turns around to look at him, surprised, and he smiles at her before taking a breath and going, “you see, daylilies, they are beautiful, and they spread that beauty around. they grow together, and they help all the other flowers around them. they build a family. they care for others. just like you do. everywhere you go, you make things better, and maybe you don’t even realize it” because LOOK im a sap and hes a sap and maia has seen herself as lonely most of her life but the way she cares for her pack and everyone she sees who’s struggling is fierce and beautiful and i just!! it really suits her!! and maia is speechless and she ends up kind of nuzzling his neck and giving him a little kiss on the cheek and he’s like “i take it you like it” and she goes “of course i liked it” and aaa

and for simon... i picture sunflowers. idk i just think simon is a sunflower kinda guy. also you know haha daylighter and shit. but really tho it’s an intense attention-calling sort of flower without meaning to, but it’s also beautiful and vibrant and livens up the place, and it also has a delicate, kind of lonely side? like idk you don’t see sunflower bouquets a lot, usually it’s a single sunflower. and the literal Dark Part you know the black part in the centre that’s swallowed up by the vibrant yellow and that people tend to ignore but that’s also there? not in the sense that simon has a Dark Side, but he hides his sorrows and there’s so much more depth to him. i also like to picture he says something like... “you know, the sunflower turns during the day, trying to always keep close to the sun. but i don’t think it realizes that it has so much beauty of its own” and simon is so very pleased and a little speechless and raphael smiles at him and teases him all like “oh, so now you have nothing to say?”

but he gets his revenge when HE gets RAPHAEL flowers cuz no i didn’t forget!! and i know i wrote that paragraph but i like to think that the first time simon got raphael flowers, that had never been mentioned before and it was a complete surprise. that time was afterwards and he was just teasing him (and maybe fishing to get more flowers because look he’s only human). but the FIRST time they weren’t dating but they were.... getting there and simon was like “HOW can i woo raphael” and everyone else is like “stop saying woo for starters” and simon is like “whatever meliorn how did you woo raphael” and meliorn tells him about the whole flower language thing and how he used that to ask raphael out and simon is like FLOWERS! GREAT! and essentially runs off to get raphael some

so next time him and raphael have a not-date simon shows up with this probably massive and very extra bouquet with many many kinds of flowers and raphael’s eyes widen absurdly and he’s like “simon, what is this?” and simon’s all like “flowers! i didn’t know which flowers you liked, so i just got a bunch, i guess.” and he starts rambling about all the kinds of flowers that he got and their names and why he thought they might like it and is all like “but then i thought, maybe he’d be more into something smaller, so i figured i’d also get-” and raphael interrupts him all like “simon. what is this?” and simon stops for a second like he’s almost panicking and raphael softens all like “i like them all. i just want to understand” and he’s softly touching the petals because this is only the second time in his life that someone got him flowers and for meliorn it had slightly different connotations as it was a cultural thing - not that it’s less special or meaningful, just like, different - and he has this little bashful smile and he’s so pleased and simon kind of goes “i wanted to ask you to go out with me” y’know and it’s SWEET okay aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa i can’t BELIEVE i’m saphael trash

in short THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK

[who-talks-first]

The Skywalker Legacy documentary confirms what I was already fairly certain was true.

I don't need to go in-depth for you Bendemption fans. I know you picked up on all the little things after the death of Kylo Ren.

But I just want to go over this a bit because, while I maintain that Kylo Ren didn't deserve redemption, if it HAD to be done, this was absolutely the best (only) way it could have happened, and I really respect Adam's performance and all JJ's attention to detail.

The metaphorical (and literal?) death of Kylo Ren and rebirth of Ben Solo don't need to be explained. But the inclusion of which gives us such a tangible, real, tactile setup for his redemption. It doesn't happen here. This is just the catalyst that lets it happen.

Harrison Ford's uncredited cameo is so beautiful. It makes this scene possible. I think it's meant to be intentionally vague, but I personally feel that Leia sent him through the Force. Memory, Force Ghost, regular ghost, guilt vision, whatever - Leia made sure her son saw it.

And from then on, with the rebirth of Ben, we get to see the man he could have been. Brave. Strong. Feeling. I don't know how they do it, but his entire affect AND appearance change. The way KR holds himself, how his hair falls is entirely different from those of BS. And it's impressive acting and makeup/wardrobe. Ben's hair is... dare I say it? Fluffy. Where we all mocked Kylo for his nasty greasy Snape hair. Something about Adam's face, even when he's fighting, feels more natural, more relaxed.

You know what? In 15 minutes of screen time for BS, I actually like him. Meaning, if he had been a character in movies instead of KR, I would have liked him and rooted for him along with the other heroes. He even looks more youthful. Instead of the 40 year old appearance in TLJ, Ben looks like he's 25 (a little closer to the character's actual age, I think). And I think that's good filmmaking that all those things can be made apparent * just like that.

Anyway. I want to focus on some details. There's probably something to be said about the costume change - from the hard, rigid armor of KR to the, uh, is that a sweater? of BS. When did he have time to do that? How'd he get off Endor? I have other questions about that escape, but that's not the focus of this discussion.

Anyway, I seen all the GIFs where scenes with KR mirror the behaviors his parents (like the Solo Slide). But I think that as Ben, we really see him channel his parents.

This is the most obvious one to me:

Han in TFA at Maz's castle/Ben arriving on Exegol (some kind person already GIFed it for me)

That's very deliberate given that these are both JJ's films.

Now this may not be as intentional as I think, but it's obvious to me. Leia training with her brother /Ben answering the knights' challenge

That casual, wide stance? I dunno. It feels like something he picked up from his mom like he picked up the other thing from his dad.

All this stuff just let you see and feel what was taken away by Snoke and Palpatine. He could have been a good man, strong fighter for the light, a Jedi like his mother before him and her father before her. It gives you that sharp contrast of what you lose when you choose the dark.

Then Ben and Rey both squaring up to fight Palpatine and then he straight up removes Ben from the fight completely. That's important. It makes sure there's no misunderstanding that this is Rey's fight. No one else can fight it for her or take it away from her. Kylo Ren said "that saber belongs to me" but the truth is Rey earned it. But I digress.

TROS builds up how strong Rey is in the Force throughout the movie, showing her ability to transfer life. Something it appears she learned on her own.

So when she falls. And it's made clear that she is dead. (Her body doesn't immediately disappear, however, and I think there's another discussion to be had on why that is!)

And Ben hesitates. You can see him wonder if he can do it.

He puts his hand on Rey and transfers far more than "a bit of life". Already drained by his and Rey's life-forces being used to revive Palpatine, it takes everything that is left in him. But he is also pulling Rey back from somewhere she hadn't yet pulled anyone with her own technique. Is Ben more powerful in the Force than she? (I don't think so, but I think in another life he could have been) I think Ben only knows all or nothing. It's part of how he got here in the first place. Perhaps he could have brought Rey back from the other side without using all his strength. Perhaps not. We'll never know.

Now I do not approve of the kiss. I don't even know how to begin discussing my feelings on it. But maybe it was necessary to include it just to pacify the Reylos (as if the redemption arc wasn't enough).

But the smile. The smile is so important. We've not once seen Kylo Ren happy anywhere in the series. I don't think anything he could ever achieve would have made him happy. But Ben, maybe even aware that he is about to meet his end, is so happy that she is alive, that he succeeded in saving her, that she defeated Palpatine, (that she is in his arms?) and he finally smiles and again we see the man that should have been. It's bittersweet. As relieved as I am to see Kylo Ren perish (because, like Darth Vader, after taking so many many lives, saving only one is not enough to live a free life) I am saddened to see Ben Solo die. There's probably a conversation to be had on how anyone can be tempted by evil. I dunno. I'm not a philosopher or anything.

Anyway. My sister, who is not really a Star Wars fan but who often understands storytelling far better than I, informed me that Leia was essentially possessing her son for the duration of the redemption arc. That's why her body doesn't disappear until Ben dies. That's why he fights like her, understands Rey's techniques better, can heal like that... I don't know if she's right, my sister. I don't think it's all Leia cuz I'll be damned if she kisses Rey on the mouth.

And then my bf informed me that Ben became a part of Rey when he disappeared into the Force. That's why his ghost didn't appear later. I don't know how I feel about that. I def don't know how Finn and Poe are going to feel when Rey tells them both this. I can't imagine wanting to smooch your gf after you find out that Hitler's wannabe poser grandson is possessing her. I mean.

Okay I've been writing so long I've lost what little coherency I started with. I'm so sorry.

But I just wanted to share my thoughts on all this with you guys. My main point is that if the redemption of Ben Solo had to be included in the film, I genuinely believe that it could not have been done better - from a storytelling standpoint AND with regards to the performance itself! - than they did for TROS. My hat is off to JJ and Adam, really.

(oh and his insistence on doing all his own stunts? Adorable.)

(I'm cool for discussion on the topic, but I have neither the time nor the energy to fight any Reylos about this and anyone trying to start drama gets the ol' Instablork.)

[spadesinglasses]

Agents of SHIELD (Series)

I finally finally finished the series. Figured a reaction post would be nice to air out all my sentimentality about the show.

Disclaimer btw, throughout this post, I would be writing shit that I hate. It might include character hate from specific situations to seasons. If you don’t want to read people hating on your fave characters, click away. If you want to change my mind about my hate, please just move on, we’ll just be wasting each other’s time.

Years ago I stopped watching AoS around season 5 episode 3.

Just this week I decided to pick it up again from the start. It was a roller coaster of emotion. From having to go through Season 1 again and how different they all are, dealing with Grant and the other arcs.

I’ve rewritten this post so many times now. One time I would be writing so much, even doing it per season only to delete it all and do it per arc, only to again delete it all and start over again.

I don’t know anymore how to write this down. But ya know what, I’ve never been that serious or technical with my reactions. So i might as well just whine about it lol.

So here ya go, a rant.

In my blog I gifed a total of 3 scenes for AoS.

The Spy’s Goodbye.

Hive and Lincoln’s death.

and Enoch’s death.

A lot of scenes made me sob like a fatherfucker but these three was too much.

The Spy’s goodbye scene was a bittersweet good bye. Not seeing Bobbi and Lance anymore was such a devastating reality, but it’s good to know that at least they do not die or sth tragic like what they did to Triplett.

Hive and Lincoln’s death was devastating in a way I wasn’t expecting. Daisy’s acting during that scene was fucking too much. THAT SHIT HURT. Lincoln’s sacrifice was something of an expected scene but god does it not have to be like that.

ALSO Hive just taking it all in, letting his death be is the most unexpected thing there. To him just saying that he just wanted connection, to make the world better was fucking sad. I understand what he said, Lincoln did too. 

Enoch’s death was fucking unappreciated.

His death was silent, he died without his best friend by his side, without Jemma, without even Deke. No, he was left with Daisy and Coulson who if I remember correctly, didn’t even have that much scene with him.

And how he just accepted it and understand that It was a necessary sacrifice was soo fucking bad.

HIS LINE ABOUT ANY OF THEM SACRIFICING THEIR LIFE FOR HIM? AND HIM JUST WAS SO SURE ABOUT IT? IT HURT BECAUSE ITS A LIE.

Y’all can tell me how the crew can do that sacrifice for Enoch, but it won’t change my mind. None of them barely even tried to understand Enoch in more ways than what was just presented in front of them.

Maybe its the curse of being a minor/side character, but that shit was sad. I wonder if that sentence was more for himself, to comfort himself in his death than him being confident about it.

Again, y’all can fight me about it, tell me off how wrong I am but nope nope nope.

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warning : Mackenzie Daisy Hate 

Now I can’t exactly remember what season or arc it was anymore. If it was during the lighthouse with the kree arc, or after or before, but damn Mackenzie really pissed me off.

His hypocritical holier than thou attitude pissed me so much. He’s a conflicting mess that adjusts his morality based on what’s in front of him. Everyone going against Elena was a fucking hard pill to take because she really was in a different sphere compare to where the others are.

I see her as doing her best to fit in with the group but unfortunately she didn’t just have that same experience with the others to be on the same wavelength as them.

Coulson agreeing with her was a small comfort. But Daisy and Mack and May? Dang that shit hurt.

There was a season where Daisy and Mackenzie annoyed the fuck out of me. I couldn’t stand a scene with them on it. I just can’t remember it much. I think it was after the framework scene.

Now that I finished the entire series, looking back to it, it’s not exactly OOC of them to act that way. But it sure was hell annoying and just ugh.

-----------------------------------------------------------

warning : Fitz Hate

This portion would be ranting about how sucky Fitz became after his trauma. I’m not even technically talking about what Fitz did to Daisy with her limiter and his whole “Oh Dark Fitz is doing all this bad shit, oh no wait its me all along” schtick.

I’m talking about how he responded to Deke throughout the series.

He was shitty to him. I’m not sure if its because of his immature ass, his fucking issues with Nazi Fitz, or whatever. He was shitty.

Deke did his best to connect with Fitz in anyway possible, DEKE IS STUCK IN A GODDAMN WORLD HE DOESN’T KNOW SHIT ABOUT, A SIMPLE SOFT WORLD EVEN COMPARE TO HIS OWN WORLD, and for Fitz do be that shitty to him?

I don’t even think there was one scene where Deke and Fitz even did not butt heads off.

YES them bantering, sniping at one another can be funny but damn was it draining after Deke chose to stay behind.

Deke did his best, but let’s face it, only Jemma truly accepted him in the group.

Not fucking Coulson, not fucking Mackenzie or May, not even Daisy and Elena. SPECIALLY not fucking Fitz. I hate what he did to Deke, and I hate all of them for not reaching out more.

I don’t think I’ll ever forgive Fitz ever anymore.

I truly enjoyed his character but after framework, or it was just too much.

Yes, he was traumatized by his own actions in the framework, all of them are but goddamn.

I don’t even want to drag Sousa in this but we can all agree that they all embraced Sousa quicker, and much warmer than how they all did with Deke. 

-----------------------------------------------------------

I think the arc I hated the most was the Lighthouse/Kree arc. The crew acted so fucking ignorant despite seeing what the circumstance is. They acted in ways that could’ve endangered the lives of the people who live in the Lighthouse, and yes sure if they solved the problem none of that would’ve happen in the first place but fucking hell they were all so ignorant.

Mackenzie’s shit with the guy with the baby was fucking unnecessary. I hated that scene so much.

Let’s talk about Season 7 which was fucking great.

After the seasons I felt meh about because of reasons written above, special mention to season 5 and it’s shitty ass, let’s finally talk about good stuff.

Let’s talk about young Malick first. Freddy opening that door was a fucking revelation. At this time I didn’t know he’s a big baddie, but goddamn was the actor so fineeeee. Like literally I was on my phone when the scene came up, and when I looked up, my jaw dropped.

ALSO LET’S TALK ABOUT THE COMICAL SEXISM AND RACISM IN THE SEASON. 

Time travel to the past has always been an iffy plot for me. Because I don’t really wanna deal with people being sexist and racist out in public, (pfft as if the 21st century was any better about it)

But they deal with it with a comical spin. Daisy and Mack threatening shitheads back was fucking awesome. THE SCENE WITH THE WHITE DEFENSE GENERAL WAS MAGNIFICENT EVEN. DEKE WAS SO FUCKING DONE WITH HIM. HAHAHA.

In season 7 the editors really had fun changing the title sequence to accomdate each time period. It was really great!

Let’s talk about Daniel Sousa, our cinnamon bun of a man who is the only one that will now hold the title “Man out of Time” now that Steve Rogers time traveled his ass back for some fake ass moving on shit.

UGH I THINK WE ALL FELL IN LOVE WITH DANIEL SOUSA IN THIS SEASON. His go to attitude and just so ready to be with Daisy was fucking great. I love Daisy and him together. After all the shit that Daisy went through, FUCKING FINALLY SHE FINALLY GETS THE HAPPY ENDING SHE DESERVESSSSS.

I want a Daniel Sousa myself. He seems to be like a traditional man who isn’t sexist and racist and homophobic ya know. (side eyeing some traditional male actors who I thought would not be shitty only to be proved wrong by them)

Anywho their kiss was fucking satisfying. And I hope that they will fucking have a great long life with Kora. 

OH I WANT TO MENTION AGENT PIPER AND AGENT DAVIS BEFORE I END THIS REACTION.

THIS TWO DUMBOS ARE FUCKING GREAT. Still not sure about reviving Agent Davis as an LMD but at least they didn’t keep it a secret that he isn’t a real person anymore.

OH SPEAKING OF AGENT DAVIS.

I shipped him one with Agent LT Koenig. I know Davis is already married and probably has a child based on his interaction with Elena but daaang.

ALSO ALSO I WANNA SAY THAT THE ENDING WHERE ELENA IS WITH DAVIS AND PIPER? THAT WAS FUCKING GOOD SHIT.

Earlier I wrote something about Elena trying to penetrate the Coulson group but not exactly being able to?

Honestly, it makes sense to me that Elena is closer to Piper and Davis than she is with any of the core 6. And I truly love the fact that Davis and Piper is Elena’s new squad. I wish they interacted more honestly.

Also I miss Agent Fox, he was a fucking cutie. Agent Keller was also damn hot lol.

I think I’m done. I can’t think of anything more to say. Oh wait maybe the bit where the guy who acted as young Garrett was actually the son of the actor of old Garrett. Lol I was shooked when I watched them have the same smile. It was eerie without knowing they are father and son lol.

Okay im done, I’m happy that I finally finished AoS. I miss the scenes where they still reference the MCU movies but it seemed like after the gravitonium arc, they didn’t do any of it anymore. Sad truly.

[overthinkingkdrama]

Jona’s 5 Worst Dramas of 2019

A couple words about this list. I’m making this for fun. If a drama you love ended up on this list, it doesn’t mean that I hate you or I think you’re stupid or have terrible taste. But these are dramas that inspired strong negative reactions in me for one reason or another, whether that be disappointment, rage or disgust.

I’ve only included dramas that finished airing in 2019 in my selection process. If you have some dramas that hated, feel free to share them in the replies or send me an ask. It’s fun to complain about things for some reason.

Also, I have included major SPOILERS in a couple of these. So read at your own peril.

Dishonorable Mention: Melting Me Softly

I sincerely tried to limit myself to only dramas that I--for whatever misguided reasons--finished in their entirety for this list. Mainly because I don’t think it’s fair to brand something as the “worst” of anything without actually giving the thing a fair shake. That’s the only reason Melting Me Softly isn’t higher on this list. But I felt that it wasn’t right to leave it off entirely, if for no other reason then out of respect for the fallen Ji Chang Wook stans out there who lost their lives trying to make it through this trash fire. Somebody needs to stand up for those brave soldiers, out their gifing trash dramas while people like me are safe and sound on our couches, watching the tag like it’s a train wreck.

I made it through only two episodes of this drama, and despite my goodwill toward the majority of the cast, they were two of the most bafflingly bad hours of television that I forced myself to sit through this year. From what I could tell while side-eyeing the drama on tumblr and twitter it didn’t improve much over the course of the run. There were a couple steamy kisses that I enjoyed in clip form, but I don’t think it would have been worth the brain cells lost to sit through any more than that.

Bottom Line: Painfully unfunny, overwhelmingly expositional with no character development, confusing pacing and sloppy editing. Two episodes was two too many.

5. When the Devil Calls Your Name

It pains me to put this on the list because it was just last year that a Jung Kyung Ho, Park Sung Woong collaboration (Life on Mars) ended up in my top 5. And giving credit where it’s due, the two male leads seem to have a great deal of fun working together and I believe that all the actors gave this drama everything they could and sincerely tried to make it work. That’s one of the things I like about Jung Kyung Ho, he picks unique, risky projects that either pay off in a big way or fall flat on their faces (like the amateurishly written and edited Missing 9) Unfortunately, this script just too messy and too bizarre to work. Ha Rip as has a deeply frustrating character arc. He’s such a self-centered jerk for the vast majority of the drama, which is fine for a Faust type story if it’s written with conviction, but every time you think he’s started to turn a corner or grown as a person he reverts back to his old ways. The writing and tone are whiplash inducing. Plus the vague “soul mates” relationship between Ha Rip and Kim Yi Kyung seemed to want to have it both ways, flipping between implied romantic potential and a father/daughter dynamic, which made me quite uncomfortable.

Bottom Line: This drama’s bizarre mythology and world building barely makes any sense at all, but at least they’re easier to follow than the character development. Attempted something unique, but couldn’t pull it off. The OST is super dope though.

4. Love in Sadness

When I watched the first teasers I got the distinct impression that this wasn’t going to be a good drama, or at best it was going to be a guilty pleasure, but at the time when I started it I was hungry for a melo and there wasn’t much airing to hold my attention so I started it on impulse. I think in this case I got what I deserved for continuing to watch something I didn’t think was very good.

The first few episodes were actually pretty gripping and intriguingly dark, but that petered of quickly and the drama became and infuriating wheel spinning exercise with barely any perceptible plot development from episode to episode. The protagonists in this are all so stupid that in the final few episodes the female lead gets kidnapped not once, but multiple times because she keeps meeting her unstable husband alone. Plus nobody in this drama seems to know how to call the police when a madman is waving around a gun. It probably wouldn’t have made me so very mad except that in the last few episodes the writer became unaccountably preoccupied with how sad the psychotic, wife-beating husband’s family life was and how lonely and pathetic his life was when he wasn’t allowed to stalk, assault, and psychologically terrorize his wife. Seriously, in the last leg of the drama the villain is the only character who gets any character development at all. The drama pulls out all the stops to try to make use feel sorry for him. It’s disgusting.

Bottom Line: When a drama about a woman trying to escape domestic violence becomes completely preoccupied with painting the abuser as tragically misunderstood, you’ve got some serious problems.

3. The Lies Within

If it wasn't for the last two episodes this drama would not be on this list, but that isn't because it was in any way an exceptional drama, or that it otherwise would have ended up on my best list. Without the last two episodes The Lies Within is a merely adequate thriller, somewhat heightened by the brutal nature of the premise. I picked this show up largely to fill the void that was left by WATCHER and it was more or less successful, plus it helped that I liked the cast. However even at the beginning this drama I felt like it had some pretty glaring tone problems. There were parts of the drama that were standard OCN dark and gritty thriller, and there were other parts that felt like a campy police sitcom. The humor, when it does crop up in this drama always feels super out of place. But then that last big twist happened and man...I can't remember the last time a drama made me that angry or cratered quite so hard with a twist.

[And this is where I spoil the HELL out of this drama...]

Before this drama decided to go all M. Night Shyamalan in it’s last two episodes, there seemed to be at least one, if not two really reasonable candidates for the kidnapper. Actually all the ground work they’d done up to that point would seem to have pointed to Young Min and if he had turned out to be the perpetrator, I would have completely bought it. Instead they decided to blow everyone’s mind by making the kidnapped husband complicit in his own kidnapping and dismemberment. Which might seem like a shocking twist until you think about it for even half a second.

What it winds up doing on a narrative level it makes everything the characters have done to investigate this series of crimes up to this point feel pointless, resulting in a huge anticlimax. It makes the ambiguous figure of Seo Hui’s husband not only hopelessly stupid, but also cruel and unsympathetic. Because he thought somehow simply sharing the information with her would put her in more danger than threatening and psychologically terrorizing her into investigating the very people he was theoretically trying to protect her from. The explanation that he was already terminally ill doesn’t to anything to mitigate the stupidity of his plan for me. Seriously, you couldn’t think of any solution aside from cutting bits off yourself and sending them to your wife in the mail? I could rant about this ending at length, but I’m going to try to stop here.

Bottom Line: As far as I’m concerned, if you choose to sacrifice the emotional and narrative coherence of your story for a cheap and dirty twist to surprise the audience, you deserve every ranty review you get.

2. Love Affairs in the Afternoon

I’m really not sure what possessed me to watch this drama to begin with. That I continued to watch it is on me. The fact that I watched it despite hating the shallow characters, the thin story and the abortive message at the core of the drama is simply a lapse of judgement for which I shouldn’t be forgiven. Why did I do it despite not having a single nice thing to say about this show? Well, there are two reasons. I was curious to see if they would do anything compelling with one or two of the characters, (specifically the serial adulteress housewife an the broody artist) and I was surreptitiously watching this drama at work and it was really easy to follow the plot while only actually keeping my eyes on the screen about half the time. I watched the last episode before the subs were available and had no trouble understanding what was going. Which could be a sign that my Korean is improving, but is more likely a sign that the writing was so predictable and simplistic that you could follow it if you didn’t speak the language at all.

[Spoilers beyond this point.]

It’s my understanding that in the Jdrama that this is based on all of the characters basically wreck their lives and end up miserable, pointing toward the emptiness of the lives of these people who try to find fulfillment through extra-marital affairs. If that’s how this drama had ended, I still wouldn’t have enjoyed the execution but I could have respected the intent. But in this watered down Kdrama-fied version all the couples’ issues are resolved in the whitewash of a last episode time skip that makes the suffering and bullshit that led up to it feel completely pointless.

Bottom Line: Maybe this level of trashy, uninspired tripe would be somewhat justified if the chemistry between the leads had been better, but somehow they even managed to screw that up. The leads are just bad, vacuous people, a fact which is rendered all the more unforgivable by them being utterly bland. Everybody needed to divorce, nobody deserved to end up happy. Please be wiser than me and avoid this one.

1. Memories of the Alhambra

Initially, I was on the fence about even producing a “Worst List” this year, because in the past few years I’ve tried to be better about dropping dramas the moment they start to disappoint me, rather than hanging on to them and winding up burning myself out. I wasn’t sure if I’d have enough material to write this list, or at least not enough material to make it worth reading. Then I remembered that Memories of the Alhambra finished airing in January of this year (2019 was impossibly long, wasn’t it?) and I thought, “Aha, I can make this work.” I knew at once this drama was going to be the shitty tinfoil star atop my Christmas tree of suck.

I’ve already written a full review of this drama, where I got about as mean as I felt I could reasonably be. You can go read that if you like, I’m not going to retread all my many complaints here. What I will say is that Memories of the Alhambra took my mixed-to-favorable opinion of the writer, Song Jae Jung, and turned it to a negative one. She’s someone who clearly has a lot of interesting high concept ideas, but the execution is just not there. You can hook an audience with a concept, but you have to keep them with craft and structure. 

Maybe the industry can be blamed for that. Maybe she just has a hard time ending her stories, or maybe writing on a deadline doesn’t agree with her. Whatever the reason, I can no longer trust her to deliver a satisfying story. And that’s deeply saddening to me, because Queen In Hyun’s Man is in my top 10 favorite dramas.

To be front-to-back terrible is one thing. The joke’s at least half on me for bothering. But to have potential, to have an interesting hook, a budget, a cast, but then to be either unwilling or unable to live up to that potential feels like a con. That’s how I felt about his drama, like I had been willfully deceived by special effects and flashy editing, all orchestrated to disguise a narratively bankrupt, unsatisfying drama.

Bottom Line:  Is Memories of the Alhambra objectively the worst drama on this list? No, it’s not. Is it the most disappointing? Absolutely, it is. And that’s the more heinous crime, in my opinion.  And that’s why it’s my worst drama of 2019.

[gargoyles42]

what your favourite jarry scene?

I’m gonna cheat a bit because my favorite is constantly changing so I’m gonna give you a few of my all time favorites.

“I’ve given up everything for you!” That scene is so full of angst and so painful but it’s just sooooo good. The acting was was amazing (we’re truly blessed with these two). And despite how it was James just pushing Harry away because of his current situation, there were some things said that needed to be said. Harry needed to hear those things about him marrying Ste because James does deserve better than that. And then Harry clinging on for dear life, his hands shaking. Him banging on the door as James leans against it. Just A++++++ It’s my current favorite (if you can’t tell by how many times I’ve gifed it).

“The only person I can talk to, be honest with, in the whole entire world is you” James’ face when Harry says that. And that HUG. So emotional and beautiful. The way Harry just melts into it. Like he’s finally found comfort, finally found where he belongs. That scene was everything. 

“I’m in love with James” Harry finally choosing James. Harry saying no to Ste, that he wants James. Because Harry could’ve had it all back in that moment. He could’ve went back to Ste and had his life back. But he didn’t want that and he couldn’t lie anymore. And despite it not exactly being the opportune moment (I really hate that I halfway felt bad for Ste), I’m SO proud of him. He was so strong in the moment by finally telling the truth and not allowing himself to be wrapped up by guilt anymore.

“I don’t think I can live without him” Harry basically seducing James. The way he stops beside James, his head at shoulder height. The tension. And the way he says “and that’s the problem”. The way he pulls on James’ suit, looking from his lips to his mouth rapidly. And it’s made infinitely better after the fact when we find out living room floor.

“Let’s go to the bedroom” Harry. Propositioning. James. This scene still makes me dieeee. James’ face. And Harry just being so confident and assertive in that he just really wants to sleep with James right then. Actually those whole sequence of scenes. Because the way Harry was looking at James the whole time he was dealing with him. He was so impressed and so wanted to jump his bones. The way he asked him to drinks. And then afterwards, after James turned him down, how they just settled into this almost domestic thing? Where they were talking, James was opening up, and then Harry saying he was starving. It was just so cute.

“I love you and all your messed up flaws” Harry begging James to stop the wedding. Finally saying that he doesn’t love Ste, he loves James. The way Harry knows what James is like, knows the kind of person he can be, but loves him not despite it but because of it. The way he loves all the bad things about him just as much as the good. Just so beautiful :’)

“I cannot give up on you, Harry. I love you.” James’ desperate pleaing. The night he’s just had and he’s just begging Harry to still want him, to still choose him. The way he just immediately tells Harry about his son, doesn’t hold back on such a major thing. And the fact that it was bluetooth that got them caught, I die.

“You love me?” “I do.” The way Harry smiles when he says “I do”, it kills me every time. He’s just so happy to be in love with James, to finally be able to say it. And James being completely taken back and surprised when Harry kisses him, which is quite the feat when Harry’s has to literally grab his face and pull him down to reach. Also, Harry just grabbing him and kissing him! And then the hug where Harry just closes his eyes and seems so content and in love

“James kidnapped me” “No, I fake kidnapped him so we could bankrupt Tony and buy the restaurant” I just LOVE this scene. Harry manipulating to get James to help out and James just making things worse for himself every time he opens his mouth. It’s just such a cute fun scene that shows exactly how wonderfully fun their relationship is gonna be.

“Be a good boy and find out what Sami Maalik’ been hiding from me” Just such a cute little domestic scene. James checking Harry out. Harry talking about how fit Sami is and James just being like “ewww no he’s hideous”. James enlisting Harry to research for him. Just another snapshot in how wonderful their domestic life is gonna be.

 “There is no doubt in my mind that you are innocent” James opening up to Harry. Harry being so completely supportive and being there for him in one of his hardest times. And the way Harry didn’t even doubt it for a second, he knew James didn’t do it and he wanted to help him prove. (Too bad Ste had to ruin everything ugh)

“I’m after you. And I always get what I want.” Harry being well and truly shook. James being so confident and coming onto him with no shame. Just such a beautiful start to my wonderful ship.

“You’re the one I want to be with” Such a heartbreaking scene. It still hurts me to watch it. But Harry finally admitting that James is the one that he wants. That if he could, he would choose him. And Harry giving his keys back, talk about ripping my heart out (I can’t wait until the day he gets them back)

Bonus one: “How stupid was I? You wanted him” Ste’s entire rant was just SO good. Him finally realizing that Harry wanted to sleep with James all that time ago, that it wasn’t about the money. And him realizing that everything had just been a total lie, the entire wedding and everything over the past months, that Harry had just been pretending “just so [he] could get back to [James]”. (Also, I hate to admit but angry Ste = hot Ste so....)

[vickyskpopkingdom]

NCT series :: Moon Taeil

overall theme: NCT and your group (I named them 'Starburst' for fun lol) debuted around the same time and since then fans wanted to see some interactions between your groups. So SM-Entertainment had the brilliant idea to start a series of cooperation performances and V-Lives.

Starting off with Taeil~

"What could be better than putting the two main vocals together and making them sing to fan-suggested songs on V-Live? Exactly, nothing!"

You scrolled through your phone while you waited for the stream to connect to the server. Taeil was next to you, already opening V-Live on his phone to see when the stream will finally be online. There was silence between you two until your managers told you that the stream started.

It's not like you guys didn't talk before, it was just the fact that you were a little nervous about this whole situation. In your opinion Taeil was an amazing vocalist with a strong but soothing voice and being able to sing with him made you a little anxious about your own voice. 

However your managers insisted on the live-broadcast which was why you were now placed next to Taeil on two chairs, in front of a table in one of SM-Entertainment's empty practicing rooms.

"Oh, look! We have 3.000 people watching right now. Hello everyone!", Taeil started greeting the viewers, while you simply waved at the phone placed in front of you two.  "Should we introduce ourselves?", he asked you.

You smiled. "Sure! For those of you who don't me: my name is Y/N and I am the main vocalist of SM's girl group 'Starburst'!"

"And my name is Taeil, I am also a vocalist but I am from 'NCT 127'! And today Y/N and I will sing songs that you, our fans, requested and maybe we will even answer some questions."

"Start requesting now!" you chimed in.

The comments came flooding in and soon you two found songs you liked and questions to answer. Taeil started with singing, while you kept searching for a song you could sing or maybe even a duet which both of you could sing together. 

You partners voice filled the room with a beautiful sound and soon you could feel yourself loosing focus. You kept scrolling through the comments but your mind was elsewhere. Without really realizing it your smile grew wider. If you wouldn't have been on a livestream right now, you would have closed your eyes to just wholeheartedly listen to his voice.

Only when Taeil's song came to an end you started to focus on the comments again and realized that a lot of your fans had noticed you wide smile. Embarrassed you adverted your eyes from the screen only to see Taeil looking at you. 

"I guess it's your turn now.", he said.

And your doubts came back. Could you compete with his voice, with the strong song he just performed? You knew you were a good singer, you didn't get the position of the main vocal for nothing, but Taeil was better, in every aspect.

However Taeil seemed to disagree with your thoughts. While you were still fighting the little devil in your head telling you that you weren't even close to Taeil, he move a little closer to the camera in front of you and began talking to the viewers: 

"Some of you may not know it but Y/N has a beautiful voice. It is very clear and strong. If you get the chance you should check out some of 'Starbust' s live performances! My personal favorite song is 'Deja Vu'."

His gaze shifted back to you.

The devil in your head had vanished as soon as Taeil had complimented you. It meant so much to you hearing him supporting your group and your voice since you had always thought of him as one of the best singers in SM Entertainment.

"Would you like me to sing my part from 'Deja Vu'?", you asked him, feeling encouraged by his words. Adding to that this was the perfect time to promote your relatively new song.

Taeil nodded. "Of course, go ahead!"

'Deja Vu' was a song about falling in love again after a terrible heartbreak, but suddenly experiencing how the new relationship falls into the same pattern as the one that had already been lost before. It relied heavily on the vocalists in your group to get across the feeling of helplessness as love seems to fade away again. You could understand why so many people thought that this was the best song from your group yet.

After you ended your part you felt a lot more comfortable in your current situation. You sang, your viewers heard it, there was nothing you could do about that now.

"Wow, Y/N that was really, really nice!", your partner exclaimed, "and our fans liked it too!", he added.

The livestream continued for around half an hour. You and Taeil warmed up more and more while your fans couldn't stop requesting more and more. By the end of your hangout you probably sang at least one song from every SM-Artist not without apologizing beforehand because some songs were really hard to master.

"We had a really great time singing together and reading all your comments!", Taeil said visibly content but also a little tired.

"Yes, thank you so much for requesting all those songs and don't forget to look out for more 'NCT' and 'Starburst' crossovers!", you closed the stream.

The camera in front of you was turned off and immediately both of you sank back into your chairs grabbing whatever drink was nearest to you. 

"Who would have thought that our fans would be so energetic?", you sighed, "But as long as they loved it, it was definitely worth it!"

Taeil nodded. "However my throat is rather sore now."

You could only agree. Your voice wasn't really fit for every song you attempted to sing today.

"Should we go get some ice cream to calm down our vocal cords?", he suddenly said.

When you looked over at him you thought that Taeil seemed a little nervous, playing with the bottle in his hands and avoiding your gaze. Only when you got up from your chair he looked at you.

"That sounds really good! My throat could use it and I guess we could use this opportunity to talk some more?!", you answered his question.

How could you say 'no' to Moon Taeil?

Without you two knowing fans were already going crazy with the new ship SM-Entertainment had just given them. Almost every part of your stream had been GIFed and the looks you had given each other were interpreted to the finest bit. Of course not everyone was happy about the great chemistry between you two however most of the fans were excited to see how the relationship between you two would continue in the near future.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

that took me longer than i expected probably because Taeil is not my bias and because I just admire his voice so much that it’s hard for me to actually write something romance-related with him.

however of course i hope you liked it nevertheless! I will start linking the other posts of this series in this post also as soon as they are up.

[froggheadd]

DWTS Week 1

So week 1 They do a foxtrot to Feeling Good by Michael Buble

But let’s talk about them meeting

So the producers keep it a secret from both Michael and Jeremy that their partner is going to be a guy because Drama

So when Jeremy walks into the rehearsal room and sees Michael, his first thought is that he’s already fucked up and walked into the wrong rehearsal room

He looks at the camera men to see if they’re just as confused as he is, but they look like everything's going to plan, so Jeremy looks back at Michael and points between them and is like “are we?” and Michael’s “We’re partners” and they both look at the cameras, and one of the cameramen nods

And they look back at each other like 

;0;

This whole exchange is GIFed so many times

Jeremy and Michael just rush towards each other and Jeremy gets so excited and starts flapping his hands “I’ve watched you every season you’re so talented!”

And Michael’s just kinda in shock because?? He’s been paired with a guy, not only that but he’s been paired with a guy who’s the same age as him , when all of the past seasons he’s been given girls who are 2.5 times his age. 

He always gets pretty close to the finale anyways, which is a testament to how amazing of a teacher he is

So who knows how far he’ll get with a partner that can actually dance

ANYWAYS BACK TO REHERSAL

While Jeremy’s talking, Michael starts to think about how this can all work out dynamically, and he’s already coming up with some ideas for what they can do. 

Once Jeremy calms down, and Michael’s gotten over the initial panic, he sits Jeremy down and talks about their first dance

They’ve been assigned a foxtrot which is a good dance to start with because it lets them get comfortable with each other and it’s not too fast

Michael picks the song Feeling Good

He and Jeremy start rehearsal and Jere is super nervous at first and he keeps stumbling

Michael can tell he has to do something to make Jeremy comfortable

So they go out to lunch together

They talk. Jeremy tells Michael about his past shows, and how he heard that one of his old costars Christine Canigula is going to be competing on the show this season as well. Michael talks to Jeremy about all of this past seasons with the show, and they find out about their shared love for vintage video games

“I’ll tell you what, when we make it through this week, you need to come over to my house and we can play Apocalypse of the Damned together. I’ heard that two-player mode is amazing.” And Jeremy gets the biggest grin on his face and agrees.

So they head back to the studio and it worked, Jeremy is more comfortable with Michael and is shooketh

“Are you sure that none of your shows had a lot of dancing in them? Because you’re a lot better at dancing than I expected.”

And Jeremy kinda blushes and looks down “I used to do ballet,,? When i was younger.”

Michael gets the biggest shit eating grin on his face because, yes. He can definitely work with this.

So they get through rehearsals and its the day of the show

Jeremy is a nervous wreck, someone help this boy

They end up going last because the producers know that a ton of people are going to be watching this show because they heard that one of the couples are two guys, so they’re gonna make the audience wait through the whole show to see them

When they play the package of Jeremy and Michael at rehearsals,,,

the first few seconds is just the initial reactions of Jeremy and Michael and it honest to god looks like a shit post, complete with really dramatic zoom in’s on their faces, and Jeremy looking dead-ass into the camera with the most confused look on his face

Then they show the beginning of rehearsals with Jeremy being a mess

And then they show clips from their lil bonding lunch

Cut back to rehearsals with Jeremy being so much better

And then it’s time for the actual dance

Jeremy and Michael are both wearing suits, and before the lights are up on them, Michael is looking at Jeremy from across the room, and trying to calm him down with just a look

The music starts and oooooooooo boy

These two blow everyone’s expectations out of the water

Choreographing a ballroom dance for two guys was going to be difficult but damn it if Michael isn't the best person they could’ve chosen

He manages to not make it look awkward at all and Jeremy looks so graceful, it’s amazing

When they finally end, Jeremy waits a second before hurling himself at Michael and wrapping him in the biggest hug, and Michael’s laughing and just so happy

They go to the judges 

Of course they critique little things like Jeremy’s form and everything, but overall it’s pretty good

Then they get their scores...

8 8 8

Which is practically unheard of in the first week

They end the night with the highest score out of all the other couples

Here’s the actual dance they do, in case anyone wanted to see it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9m6g4mfVa0g

Okay, so that was week 1 of this AU. I’ll hopefully be doing 10 of these, going week by week through all of Jeremy and Michael’s dances. I dont know if I’ll ever turn this into an actual fic, but I just have so many ideas for this AU I want to get them all down.

But if anyone ever wants to ask me about this AU, I’m always 100% down to talk about my dancing boys

[felicityb-reviews]

Review Roundup - Week 2 January 2018

Hello loves!! My name is Jace (aka Felicity B), and this is your Review Roundup for the second week of January 2018!! I can't really tell if I liked this week in music better than I did last week. There's a better variety songs, at least.

Beware (Stray Kids)

I really wanna like these kids, because it's obvious af that JYP does not.

But.

Nothing they've released has really been up my alley. Beware (I realize that the actual name of the song is GRRR Total Law of Madness, but sis...) sounds like a better produced version of Wolf, and you'd think that was a good thing because Wolf was a poorly produced mess. But this song takes itself so fucking seriously. It's not terrible, but it's not something I really want to listen to again.

I don't get JYP's angle with this group. First, there was the survival show that wasn't really a survival show (which I'm glad, because I fucking hate actual survival shows). And before that was Hellevator, another overly serious song that makes me roll my eyes. And now this. I really don't wanna be a dick because this is their second release and they're teenagers, but I'm not a fan of being growled at by a bunch of high schoolers and then having my ears assaulted by nasal singing (because, of course, their vocalists sound like they're trained by the same people who trained JB). It's not a fun experience.

Do betta, JYP.

Rating - 1/5

Going Going (Jang Wooyoung)

Oh look, it's another JYP act with a bad song!!

Okay, the song isn't that bad, but there's not enough positives for me to overlook the negatives. Of which there are many.

Firstly, this an uptempo that drags; I literally could not wait for the new section to begin, because I was ready for the last one to end. And this is New Jack Swing, baby. My black ass fucking loves New Jack Swing (yes, even The Boys). But I could give you an entire playlist of K-Pop songs in the style of NJS that are W A Y better than this.

Secondly, Wooyoung doesn't sound particularly good singing on top of it. The rap bits were the best parts of the song, for me. Which is about 90% not his fault, because whoever was on vocal production duties was slacking. His voice sounds like dude dropped them on the beat, adjusted the levels a lil bit, added some reverb to sound like he actually did his job, and went tf home.

Tragique.

Thirdly, the arrangement of this song is weird af. What do I mean by that?!?! There are two choruses. Yes honey, you read that correctly - two choruses. The song starts out with a section you'd assume is the chorus, but when you get to the second chorus, it's something completely different. In fact, you don't hear this first "chorus" till the end of the song again (which, in hindsight, I'm glad you only hear it twice, because the lyrics make me roll my eyes so hard and the vocal melody has the weirdest rhythm pattern). I guess that's not too weird when I write it out, but it majorly throws you off when you hear it play out in the song. For me, anyway. Which is surprising, because Red Light and I Got A Boy are All Time Faves™ of mine (with Oh! being a runner up). But I guess I just don't like it here.

#PickyBitch

And since we're on the subject of the arrangement... WHY ARE THESE TRANSITIONS SO FUCKING LONG?!?!?!!?! SIS, THE TRANSITIONS BETWEEN SECTIONS DON'T NEED TO BE 10 FUCKING SECONDS LONG!!! THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE!!

Once again - Do betta, JYP.

Rating - 2/5

Don't Leaves (Block B)

And here come the ballads!! We're not mad at it, tho.

We all knew what kind of ballad Don't Leave Me was gonna be. More of a midtempo than an actual ballad, Don't Leave Me sounds a bit like a B1A4 or Seventeen song, but with Block B's track record as of late, we're not gonna dock points for that. Don't Leave Me starts out with a filtered percussion section that they unfilter for about 2.75 seconds before getting into the verse, almost as if they're reassuring us that they haven't gonna completely left of center with this ballad. Which is nice, because it creates a nice transition (not the word I'm working for, but you get what I mean) into the verse. And from there, they layer in more elements to create a nice backdrop for Block B's vocalists to actually show us what they can do.

Because God knows Shall We Dance was literally Zico and the boys. It was fucking ridiculous.

From the teasers, I thought I was gonna hate this (or be extremely apathetic to it ) but I should've known better. These B1A4 style/YG template ballads always get me, sooner or later (*WINN4R cackling as Fool plays in the background*). This isn't something I'm gonna put into Heavy Rotation (because God only knows my hyperempathetic ass doesn't need another reason to randomly be thrust into a depressive episode), but I wouldn't relegate this to Shuffle Bait.

Especially with Zico and P.O sounding as good as they do here. Granted, Zico sings half his verse and P.O doesn't rap at all, but you gotta take those small victories where you can find them. And they have really nice singing voices, too.

Rating - 4/5

The girl from back then (LONG:D)

This, however, is a ballad that's going right into Shuffle Bait. If I even download it, at all.

Where is the LONG:D that gave me All Night, sis?!?!?! The intro literally sounds like the Sad Piano Music™ that Youtubers download en masse from those royalty free music sites. Like, I was literally tempted to skip this release all together, but I rather like the way LONG:D's vocalist sounds (if Baekhyun was a properly trained and a baritone who actually needed all that chestiness in his mix, with a dash of Kang Seung Yoon's rasp).

The girl from back then sounds like a more generic version of Seventeen's Campfire. It's not what I'd consider a classical ballad (has too much going on), but it's just as boring as one. On repeat listens, the Gospel influences (however faint they are) did grow on me, but I can't even see myself wanting to listen to this when I'm in the mood for downtempo ballads. LONG:D's voice puts this into Shuffle Bait, but just barely.

It's too anybody of a ballad, sis.

Rating - 2.5/5

Tell Me (INFINITE)

Dongwoo's demonic ass starting this song with a whispered "Anywhere, Anytime" should have prepared me for how catchy this fucking song was gonna be.

Tell Me, like Wooyoung's Going Going, starts off with the chorus. But instead of giving us two different choruses when no one needed that in their life, it makes a very typical pop song sound a lot more interesting than it actually is.

Now... What Tell Me's composers/producers did isn't original by any stretch of the imagination. I know it seems a little counterproductive to mention this before I explain what they did (and why it's so cool), but I just know someone is going to try me on this.

So.

Tell Me (after Dongwoo terrorizes us with the raspiness in his voice) starts with the chorus, but a very stripped back and simplistic version of it. If you're not paying attention (which I might not have been the first time I listened), you could easily mistake it for the verse. That surprised me, because composers/producers don't usually start out their songs with the chorus being sung, if they have the chorus first; they usually play the chorus melody using some kind of instrument that sounds important (like Orange Caremel's Magic Girl, for example). Tthey'll also usually have it going at full intensity, so when it switches to the verse it's very obvious that what you just experienced was the chorus (since that's usually the most important aspect of the song in pop music).

So yeah, nothing too left field, just an interesting twist on an oft used formula.

Outside of that, this song is a very typical INFINITE title track. Very intensity, much dramas. Which I don't hate, because they're one of three groups in K-Pop who can do a song like this, and not bore me to death.

Rating - 4.5/5

Secret Garden (Oh My Girl)

Secret Garden is Orchestral Pop. It's not just typical, it's cliche af. Even IU, circa 2010, wouldn't have touched this with a 10ft pole.

But God save us all, I really like this song. And it's not even that I'm OMG trash (their anti-South Asian foolery during Windy Day era, combined with my general disinterest with anything they've done since then, stopped that right in it's track), but that chorus melody, sis. It's just so G O O D!! That, combined with the sweet, almost milk chocolatey texture of the instrumentation makes me feel like I'm floating. And you know what, 2018 is all about me livin my best Gife™ (Gay Life), but it's also about me being self-indulgant and liking what I like, no guilt attached.

I will say that I wish that this song had more live instrumentation in it. Those strings are definitely synth generated, and it's kind of distractingly obvious. The percussion is also too heavy for this type of song. It feels like I'm listening to a demo that OMG's company decided to send to a mastering house and release, cause they couldn't be fucked to work on the song anymore. It doesn't ruin it for me, but I can't help but notice these things.

Rating - 3/5

Glow (Choi Jaemin featuring EZ KIM)

Glow is a Sad™ song for Sad Days™. This is a song that throws down a blanket of it's angst and just revels in it. And while that isn't something I'm trying to listen to On The Daily™, I can save this for for those really bad days I just need to cry out those ugly emotions.

Contrary to what I said about Secret Garden, Glow is a song I felt like could have been beefed up by some electronic elements. The bass could have been thickened up in post, because it feels too limp for a song like this. Hell, they could added a low af ass sine bass to sumplement the bassist, and I wouldn't have minded. Overall, the production of this song is very loose. And I get that super tight production in an emotive song like this would have bleached out all the emotion, but more could have been done to tighten up how the elements don't really blend together. Especially the vocalists. They don't really fit together like they should, and I guess that kind of enhances the experience since this song feels like one long ass disonant chord, but still.

Teenage me would have played this song to death. Which makes me glad that I'm not that person anymore.

Rating - 3/5

Lonely (Jo Kwon)

See... I wanted to be petty, and just post his dance videos with Lia Kim, but we're trying to be a better person in 2018.

This is a really nice ballad. Not something I'd put on Heavy Rotation (i feel like a fucking broken record), but if he H A D to do a classical ballad, it wasn't as bad as it could have been. I'd have preferred a ballad like his duet with Gain, Q&A, but it was nice of Mr Kwon to remind us plebians that while he is a Dancing Diva™, he did get his start as a ballad singer.

I'm gonna need him to throw it back to his Animal days for the next release, tho. This was nice and all, but I need to see him featuring in Hyuna's next comeback with those shiny red boots and a trope of male dancers.

Also in red heels.

Rating - 3/5

Candy Pop! (TWICE)

Firstly, can I just say that TWICE's Japanese team are R E AL L Y giving these girls the push to be huge, because this video is ridiculously high budget. That is the best animation I've seen in a J-Pop music video. And I used to be a huge J-Pop stan before I got into K-Pop.

Secondly, whoever put that pink monstrosity on my girl, Sana, needs to be fired. I just can't, sis.

Do betta, JYP.

Lots of people are not a fan of Candy Pop, and I can't lie - that's partially why I like it so much. I will admit that I'm a sucker for cutesy pop tracks like these, but I'm also a petty bitch who's no stranger to loudly stanning TWICE because people want to talk shit out the side of their mouths about their supposed lack of talent.

News flash Marleigh/Zeno - the concept of talent in K-Pop literally doesn't fucking matter, because your level of talent does not dictate the kind of music you produce. Groups like SPICA and Mamawhomst Mamamoo have songs that vary wildly in quality, because some of the people they've worked with get lazy af when they work with vocal groups.

Anyway, Candy Pop will do just fine in Japan, because TWICE already have a sizable following there and it fits within the sonic landscape. It also has some pretty cool musical twists, like a halftime break for a post-chorus refrain. I definitely like One More Time better (Candy Pop can get aurally tiring pretty quickly because of that chorus, which is why that post-chorus breakdown is appreciated), but Candy Pop is pretty great, too.

Rating - 4/5

Spotlight (MONSTA X)

Monsta X may have revisited their debut sound, but I don't want to stab them all for it. It's a Christmas miracle!!

Spotlight is Monsta X doin' what Monsta X does best - intense trapstep uptempos with choreography to match. The difference between something like this and Trespass (*shudder*) is that they're taking themselves W A Y less seriously. They look like they're having fun ruining our lives with how hot they are, and even though Spotlight isn't something I'd describe as ~fun~, that still translates to the music.

Spotlight was quite the surprise for me when Universal Japan dropped the video on us. Mostly because it was a Japanese release with a full MV on Youtube (don't look at me like that, Japanese companies are allergic to digital releases actually making sense), but also because I had no idea MX was in Japan.

Spotlight is a banger. It brings me joy to see MX showing their sons how to make music like this and not be absolutely boring or pretentious af. This song is definitely going on Heavy Rotation.

Rating - 4.5/5

Stagger (Cheetah)

This song makes me extremely uncomfortable.

And I get that that was the point, with the video featuring Cheetah in various states of intoxication, but... God, I just feel so fucking unsettled anytime I listen to this song. It feels Wrong™. I get the concept (it's actually pretty cool), but you can't just be outchea makin' songs that no one wants to listen to more than once. That makes no sense, sis.

How does one even describe this song?!?!?! First, there's that horn (I think) sample that has been manipulated to all fuck. There's no way in hell they just copy n pasted that from somewhere with it sounding like that. That's like the base of the song. And then you've got that stilted drum machine patterns, combined with parts of the song playing in reverse. Cheetah almost doesn't fit in this song with how sharp her rapping is, but it works (I guess), because it adds to the disonant atmosphere of the track.

I'm here for artistry and experimentation in popular music circles, but can we make songs that people can actually, you know... LISTEN TO?!?!?!?!?!?

I will say that I'm here for the preview she showed at the end of the video, tho. Ma'am outchea givin us High Fashion Butch™ with a tropical beat, and my wig was instantly in tatters.

Rating - 1/5

20th Century (V.E.I.L)

Idk who V.E.I.L is, but I love this song.

The quickest way to get me into your band is to give me New Wave. Or NuDisco. Or Deep House. Or Lo Fi Electronica (like 20th Century). To be honest, you could give me any number of throwbacks to the '80s or '90s, and I'd fucking love you.

But that's neither here nor there.

20th Century is a fun af song, and I wonder when this became such an oddity in K-Pop. Companies these days (as well as stans) are obsessed with perfection in their groups, at the cost of personality. And granted, it's always kind of been this way, but it's at an all time high these days. Every group performs like a well oiled machine. Which is great. But they look like robots. And with the music these agencies give their groups, it's not a pleasant experience. Very rarely is a terrible one, but at least when it's bad, it registers a reaction.

Anyway, 20th Century sounds like something I'd expect from the Polysics (now that's a throwback to my weeb days, if I've ever seen one), but more on the electronic side. It's got that same Lo Fi/'90s feel to it, but it's dressed up in '80s synthpop. Which is never a bad thing. A part of me almost wonders what this song would be like if an idol group promoted it, but she quickly hushes up when my logical side reminds her an idol group would never promote anything with production this Lo Fi.

I mean, there's TAHITI's Tonight, but sis... Let's not kick 9muses 2.0 while they're down.

Rating - 4/5

Butterfly (Weki Meki)

Fascinating how Weki Meki had to have their comeback delayed because of trouble with a shareholder, but they were able to push out this song for the Winter Olympics.

But I'm sleep, tho.

Weki Meki's Butterfly is a cover of the 2009 OST for the film Take Off, originally by Loveholics. Weki Meki's cover was released in honour of the 2018 Winter Olympic Games.

Um... I like Weki Meki's cover more than the original.

Weki Meki's cover is in the style of synthpop, and that fits the chord progressions and song structure a lot more than the pop/rock arrangement of the original. It also brings out the nostalgic vibes of the song, because these types of chord progressions were used very heavily in the '80s/'90s. After listening to Weki Meki's cover, the original just sounds flat and poorly produced. Which I mean, K-Pop didn't really have good production till about 2013/2014.

So.

The video linked above doesn't feature the full song, so here's a lyrics video that does.

Rating - 4/5

Electric Kiss (EXO)

Yes, I do realize this song has been floating around the EXOnet since around November, but I haven't seen an official release featuring the full song till this dance practice. And I've been wanting to cover this forever.

You guys, tell me why I thought EXO was really about to throw some 5th Harmony/BO$$ type shit down with that intro?!!?! I really thought I was about to get EXO outchea, flexin' on these heauxs, but maybe we aren't ready for alladat. Lordt knows the way EXO L reacted to Lotto shows it.

But that's neither here nor there, sis. What matters is how amazing Electric Kiss is. She starts out strong with heavy brass stabs and an even heavier drum beat, and only builds from there. Miss Kiss is not playin' games with us, ladies. She might not have been the BO$$ style flex that I thought she was gonna be, but that doesn't mean she's a slouch, neither.

When teasers for a Japanese EXO album turned up on SM's YT channel (which makes no fucking sense, but okay, girl), I was iffy. With singles out like Love Me Right ~romantic universe~ (as if adding a subtitle would make that song any better) and Coming Home, I was not hopeful. But Electric Kiss bangs harder than anything EXO has released since Call Me Baby. I never would have expected a Japanese EXO campaign to net me music this good with how bad their Japanese singles have are, but I really should've known better. EXO has always thrown down when it comes to the music, and Electric Kiss is a certified B A N G E R!!

I was tempted to put this in the Fabulous Five, but the songs there deserve to be, so...

Rating - 4.5/5

Refresh (TSUN featuring YUMADA)

So I see y'all just gon' hit me with the a sexier version of Blah!??!?!?! We really doin' that, sis?!?!?!

Alright, sis... Don't be mad when you see these rough ass body rolls.

Refresh, like I mentioned above, is a sexier version of Planetarium's Blah. It's the same kind Tropic/RnB hybrid arrangement, but the instrumentation is more Tropical than RnB. Miss TSUN's singing definitely gives Refresh an RnB vibe, tho. The production here is a little loose, but it's not too glaring obvious.

Rating - 3.5/5

The Fabulous Five

5. Timeless (Jaehyun, Doyoung, and Taeil of NCT U)

Firstly, I need someone to tell me what song this sounds like, because it's been bothering me since release. These chords sound vaguely familar to me, I just can't tell what song Timeless shares them with.

Moving on.

When SM annouced that the NCT U Trio were making a comeback with a ballad for SM Station, I was not pleased. Station ballads are notorious for being lackluster af, and I was annoyed that SM really wanted this to be the song that followed Lower.

This is me eating my words.

I'm a little blown away at how amazing this turned out. NCT is a "group" (if you can even call them that) that has always come as more machine than man, so a ballad release (especially a Station ballad release) is the opposite of what I wanted from them. But they sound so raw and vulnerable here, it's a little heartbreaking.

Doyoung, Taeil, and Jaehyun are all very nice vocalists, but it is clear that Taeil is the main vocal of this unit, sis. Like... A bitch really started tearing up during his parts!! Doyoung and Jaehyun have the technical skill, but Taeil was really outchea singin' for his life!! And his belts are so nice?!?!? Fuck... He's really giving Taeyong a run for his money as my NCT bias, and I don't need this.

I can see why they wanted to do a live video here - K-Pop producers have a tendency to overdo the vocal production when doing studio recordings. And while that results in perfect vocals, it comes at the cost of any emotion or integrity in the vocal performance. And for an artform like K-Pop where the ability to emote isn't high up on the list of requirements for idols, that's a big fucking deal. Especially when ballads are usually used as more of a way to show off vocal ability than what they're supposed to. Which is kind of ironic, considering most main/lead vocalists have shit technique, and are usually picked for their ability to belt really powerfully (read - holler real loud).

I definitely would not have liked this if it was studio recorded. Yes, they're recording this *in* a studio (them vocals is too clean, sis), but... Y'all know what the fuck I mean!!

Rating - 5/5

4. Full Moon (Dreamcatcher)

Dreamcatcher said in a recent interview that they do enjoy their sound, and most of the members (literally everyone except one; and even then, she just wanted to branch out a lil) would like if they could go darker. So I guess this is their agency honoring that.

Full Moon is a very typical Dreamcatcher song (which makes sense, since this is their anniversary release) with symphonic elements mixed within a heavy rock backdrop, which gives off the vibe of heavier J-rock and VISUAL KEI songs. And you wouldn't think that would make for a very pop friendly song, but their composers/producers use very pop-friendly chord progressions and song arrangements. Add in the members of Dreamcatcher (who have voices that are very suited to pop music), and you have a formula that shouldn't work. But it does.

It works, oh so well.

The video linked above doesn't feature the full song (I'm guessing they're gonna release the full video with their March comeback, because the song is already out in full), so here's their performance at their fan meeting that does.

Rating - 5/5

3. I'm all ears (Kim Taeyeon)

I'm all ears is a song from Taeyeon's Christmas album (which I might have downloaded, but never listened to). I'm guessing the video release is a gift to the fans type dealio, because she's not promoting it.

I find it interesting that I'm all ears was included on a Christmas themed album, because it feels springy. In fact, this song almost feels like Taeyeon heard Jessica's Because It's Spring, and decided that she wanted to make her own version. Which I'm cool with, because I like I'm all ears better. I like when Taeyeon gives us light and airy. Beltyeon is annoying, because her belts sound pinched and nasal. And Taeyeon relies on them far too much to cover up the fact that she can't emote very well with her voice.

But this is good.

I'm definitely putting this song on Heavy Rotation. I know, #Shocking. But if anyone peeped how I was fawned over Twenty Something from last week's list, it really shouldn't be that surprising.

Rating - 5/5

2. Love You (Eom Ji Hee)

Now this is a real throwback to my youth days (don't ask, I'm not about to become That Kind™ of blog).

There's something so... Nice™ about hearing something this raw and unmastered, especially since we're so used to hearing such high production values in K-Pop. And I know I've clocked other songs on these lists for having loose production, but the difference is that this is SUPPOSED to be low production; this is literally a girl singing with her backing band with a camera on. I could point out all the things "wrong" here, but they don't really take away from the performance. The songs I've clocked for being low production, however, were studio recorded affairs that missed the mark. And granted, not everyone can afford to send their shit to a professional mastering house, but it's not hard to get harmonies to sit nicely in the mix.

Anyway, this is another song that sounds real familiar (I'm pretty sure this is a cover, because even the vocal melody sounded familar, and that's a big fuckin no no), but it sounded real nice. This is musics I'm trynna listen to on good days when I can't sleep. The video is even perfect for it, with it's starry projection on the band!!

Rating - 5/5

1. Diamond Girl (MxM BRANDNEWBOYS)

Remember how I said you could give me any kind of throwback to the '80s and/or '90s, and I'd be happy?!?!?!

Diamond Girl is exactly what I'm talking about.

Diamond Girl is a funky n (most importantly) fun throwback to the '90s (with a little bit of '80s synth work thrown on top for good measure). The bass work is a highlight for me, and that damn "my diamond girl" hook won't leave me the fuck alone. That, and the "treat you like a gentlemen, like a gentlemen" (which is literally the same rhythmic pattern and interval as Chuu's "you attack my heart, you attack my heart" in Heart Attack) refrain are certified ear worms. Even the biggest pop haters couldn't resist those lines getting stuck in their head.

Like... I really don't know how to describe what I like about this song. Sure, I picked some stuff out, but that's just the tip of the iceburg. This song is balls to the walls A M A Z I N G!!!

2018 is the year of groups with lackluster debuts making amazing comebacks, I guess.

Rating - 5/5

Alright, babies, that's it for this week!! Don't forget to tune in on Friday for the next installment in my Jonghyun tribute with the first SHINee Feature Spotlight at 6pm EST, and next week at 6pm EST for this week's Review Roundup. Love you, guys!!

[nh935]

The Adventures of Solaire, Part III: Introductions All Around!

The Incredible Yet Accurate Adventures of the Dread Pirate Captain Solaire Ravenheart

Otherwise known as

The Adventures of Solaire

Part III

Introductions All Around

“People,” the third king of Nestoria, Solomon Prester, once said, “are a most peculiar animal,” and while he said that while he was very drunk at a banquet and later clarified that he meant to say “pigs”, the phrase turned out to be such a quality piece of accidental wisdom that it has spread to every corner of the globe. Today, it is commonly used as a neutral response for a grieving friend. Whenever someone comes to you with news of a neighborly dispute, an unfair ruling of justice, or even a broken heart, it is safe to respond with “well, people are a most peculiar animal,” as that allows you to take your friend’s side of the story without commiting to a point of view on the matter.

I, myself, have never liked the phrase. It makes human beings look like some sort of mysterious mythical creature, of which the inner workings will never be understood or explained. On the contrary, I find humans to be very simplistic creatures, driven by the same needs of food, shelter, companionship, and pride that most of the animal kingdom follows. What it does reveal to me, though, is that some people will never understand other people. To them, the machinations of a mind that is not their own is as mysterious as the forces that cause a small acorn to grow into a mighty tree. 

Solaire is one of those people. More so than most, in fact. But a quality that is even more Solaire is to fix a problem with the most unorthodox solution available, and his lack of empathy is no exception. You may see for yourself in the pages ahead.  

***

Weiss stared at the five men in the glass in front of him. Thanks to a very thin layer of silver on the pane (another invention of Weiss), they sat oblivious to his surveillance, believing that the large reflective sheet was nothing more than a mirror. He was unable to hear what they were saying, but that was of no consequence. He just wanted to take this moment to study them.

Three were in cuffs, with metal plates stapled to their neck. First there was Willaby, the strange fat man in the horrid green suit. He’d actually cried when they brought him in. Based on the reports of the sparkly smoke found in the second deck hall, he was a mage of some kind. Not a very good one, but a mage nonetheless. Then there was Skylar. One of the security men hired on. Shame about that. He’d shown quite a bit of promise, especially with those hook swords of his, but if his own guard would turn on him for the promise of quick coin, better to find out this way, he supposed. And then there was the youngest Ravenheart, the cause of all this commotion. Sitting there, surrounded by his two most intimidating guardsmen, the steely-faced, armored Tomo and the humongous, grinning Austin, he looked…

...bored.

Weiss “tisk”ed to himself and furrowed his brow. Such strange behavior from one of such noble blood. Surely, there was no way the money he was trying to steal was anything more than pocket change to him. Perhaps he was broke. Or simply stupid.

Solaire yawned.

That had to be it, he decided. He was giving the man too much credit. There was no greater scheme behind boarding his ship in the middle of a voyage. Even the sugar was most likely a fluke. He had potential with a pistol, that much was certain, which was the only reason he was alive right now. But in the mental department? Not much there.

Behind Weiss, his accountant Winthrop Skroob, second mate Charlie Scotts, and two more guardsmen stood. All four knew better than to interrupt their employer when he was thinking.

“Vhen did zis happen?” Weiss finally asked, back still turned to his employees.

“Um, at about 0540, sir” Charlie responded.

“Vhy vas I not informed?”

“You told me not to bother you with any more calls about this man, sir.”

Weiss chuckled. “Ah, yes. I did say zat, didn’t I?”

Nobody responded.

He pulled out a pocket watch and checked the time. “At zis point in ze voyage, ve are fife hundred miles avay from ze uninhabited Chrysanthemum Isle, nien?”

“I believe so, sir” Winthrop replied.

Weiss nodded. “Change course to brink us alongside it. Hold zis man in ze brig until ve can maroon him zere.”

“What? No!” Charlie exclaimed as the guardsmen wrapped their arms around him and dragged him away. “You can’t do this, please!”

“Standard pistol wis one schot. You’re lucky I’m gifing you zat much. Frankly, it’s a vaste on you.”

Charlie began screaming in protest and thrashing as he was carried down the hall. His voice faded away.

Weiss turned to face Winthrop. “Correct me if I’m vrong, but I belife Strussenbaug vas his second in command?”

Winthrop withdrew a small notebook from his jacket pocket and flipped to a page. “No, that’s correct sir.”

“Promote him to Charlie’s old position. Let him know in no uncertain terms vhat happened to his predecessor. Oh, and Vintrhop!” Weiss called out as Winthrop was about to leave, “put in an order for glass panes to place in ze slot machine vindow. Ve don’t vant anyone else to try zat again.”

Winthrop gave a polite nod and left the room.

Weiss turned back to the one-way window. Five more minutes of observing his charges, he decided. Then he’d have enough information to begin this little showdown of wills.

***

Meanwhile, on the other side of the glass, Solaire yawned again. “This Weiss guy better show up soon. I’m bored.”

Skylar, the man in the red and brown leathers, ogled at him. “You’re bored? We’re about to be punished by one of the most powerful men in the world for making him look like a fool at his own casino, and you’re bored?”

“Well it’s not like there’s anything to do while we wait” Solaire retorted.

Willaby, the round man in green tweed, was staring up at Austin. The man was gigantic, easily over six feet tall and close to three hundred pounds of pure muscle. With his large, blad, head, massively broad shoulders, bronze tanned skin and swirling black tattoos all over his face, he resembled a bit more of a mountain brought to life and stuffed into a gentleman’s white suit coat and trousers than a man.

Austin gazed down at Willaby and grinned, revealing a mouth of triangular, shark-like teeth. “Whatcha lookin’ at?”

Willaby’s eyes widened. “Oh, sorry, I-I’ll stop staring now.”

Austin laughed. “C’mon, tell me what’s on your mind. I don’t judge.”

“Well, it’s just…” Willaby leaned in and lowered his voice to a whisper. “Are you a grunzen?”

The large man nodded. “Yep. ‘Cept in my tribe, we called ‘em Nunui Nui. ‘Big Ones’. Elders figured it out when I was five feet tall by the time of my fifth birthday. Seemed to have capped out, though.”

“Goodness me. It’s just… well, I’ve heard about them, but I never got to see one before. Is it true that it’s just a random condition of birth?”

Austin shrugged. “That’s what the hoity-toities on the top deck tell me.”

“Well, I have to say, you seem very, um…” Willaby stopped, having trouble with the words.

Austin leaned over. “Yes?”

“...er…”

“Not stupid,” Solaire called out.

Willaby gaped back at Solaire in shock and fear. Austin just laughed. “Yeah, I know. Elders told me I was the first Nunui Nui to figure out how to talk, let alone carry out conversations. Probably would have been a genius otherwise.”

Willaby turned back to Austin. “So the intelligence levels of grunzens differ?”

“All sorts of things differ,” Austin said. “Some of us get really fat instead of strong. Some have shark teeth, like me, and some of us like to take our enemies, rip open their throats, coat our skin in their blood, and dance naked under the light of a bright full moon.”

Willaby went pale. “W-what? Grunzen don’t d-do th-th-that.”

“Oh.” Austin’s grin went wider. “Guess that’s just me.”

A slight whimper escaped Willaby’s lips.

(A quick aside: Austin’s shark teeth are not a random trait of the grunzen. His were filed to that shape as part of his initiation ceremony as a warrior of the tribe. I am unsure as to the exact purpose of this lie, outside of scaring Willaby, though he is a grunzen, if that falsehood caused that fact to come into question.)

While this was happening, Skylar scooched himself, and, by extension, the chair he was bound to, over to the bronze-skinned, clean-shaven, stoic-faced warrior wearing a huge set of armor made out of scales of iron and hardened leather painted dark red. He also carried a long katana sheathed at his side.

“Psst,” he hissed, “hey Tomo.”

 Tomo slowly turned to him.  

“You’re going to help me get out of here, right?”

Tomo returned to staring straight ahead.

“C’mon,” Skyler pleaded, “don’t do me like that.”

“You have brought shame and dishonor upon yourself by betraying the trust given to you by your employer,” Tomo responded. “I do not wish to speak with you.”

“That makes it sound a lot worse than it actually is!”

“You attacked the charges you were supposed to be helping for the promise of gold coin.”

Skyler mumbled something unintelligible and angry. “Alright, fine! But I’ve learned my lesson. Please, Tomo.”

Solaire rolled his eyes. “Give it up. Mr. Stick-in-the-Ass isn’t going to budge.”

“I am not” Tomo confirmed.

“See?” Solaire replied.

“I also have no sticks in my anus.”

“You get many ladies with that sparkling personality of yours?” Solaire asked.

“I do not associate with women. I must remain pure, disciplined, and celibate to uphold the code of bushido.”

Solaire groaned. “Weiss, just get here already!”

“Shut up!” Skyler spat at him. “You, of all people, have no right to complain right now!”

“I have every right to complain,” Solaire shot back. “I’m stuck in this holding cell with three wet blankets and a crazy shark man.”

“Crazy shark man…” Austin muttered, amused.

“I see no damp sheets” Tomo observed.

“Yes, because of you!” Skyler scowled at him. “If it wasn’t for you, we wouldn’t be down here.”

“I don’t recall holding a gun to your head to help me,” Solaire remarked. “If anyone has a right to complain, it’s the fat man with the whiskers.”

“Yeah!” Willaby exclaimed.

Solaire glared at him.

Willaby’s gaze returned to the floor. “B-but I won’t.”

“Don’t let him intimidate you!” Skyler yelled.

“Don’t let him intimidate you into not being intimidated!” Solaire yelled as well. “I’m very scary, trust me.”

Austin chuckled. “I like this one.”

“Are the sheets hidden?” Tomo asked.

“Shut up!” Skyler shouted.

“Or what?” Solaire challenged.

 “I’ll shut you up myself!”

“Quite a boast coming from a man tied to a chair.”

“I will...”

CLANG.

Mr. Weiss entered at the other end of the room, accompanied by a thin man who looked like a vulture in human form, carrying a small book.

Austin and Tomo subtly straightened up.

“Vell, vell, vell.” He approached a metal table at the center of the room, set his red velvet tophat on the surface, and leaned onto the table. “Zis is quite ze interesting situation, nien?”

Willaby and Skylar glanced nervously at each other.

“Ah, but vhere are my manners?” Mr. Weiss continued. “Allov me to introduce myself; my name is Mr. Veiss, and I am your nev boss! Nov, you might hafe noticed zat zere is a metal plate attached to your skin. Vould anyone like to help me demonstrate it?”

Solaire narrowed his eyes at Weiss. “How about you demonstrate it after you shove it up your… GAAH!” A buzzing sound filled the air as Solaire jerked this way and that, eyes screwed shut in pain. When it was over, a long line of ozone-reeking smoke trailed from the plate in his neck.

“Zank you, Mr. Ravenheart.”

“It’s Solaire,” he gasped. “And happy to help.”

Weiss chuckled. “Zese are Abrary slave plates,” Solaire looked up and gritted his teeth at that, “and zey vork vis a combination of magic and technology too far adfanced for you to underschtand, let alone vork around. I can gife you a controlled, non-lethal schock vis zis,” he held up a small remote with a button, “or I can tell it to delifer a lethal blow. It vill also deliver a lethal schock if you tamper vis ze plate, attempt to remofe ze plate, or if my heart efer stops beatink. Undershtood?”

Nobody spoke.

“Excellent! I’m schure it goes visout saying, but you are all mine now. Vhen I say jump, you say ‘hov high?’ Vhen I say run, you say ‘hov fast?’ Zere are seferal tasks I need you to complete for me as ze days go by. Tomo and Aushtin” he said, gesturing to the two men behind them “vill also be helpink you. Vhile I am not vis you, zey will be in command, so if zey ashk you eizer of zose questions as vell, you are to respond in ze exact. same. vay. Do zis all vell and visout queschtion, zen ve can talk about releasing you.”

“Talk?” Solaire interjected. “You expect us to kiss ass to you for a pat on the head and a maybe?”

Weiss glanced over to Solaire. “Ah! Mr. Ravenheart…”

“It’s Solaire.”

“...glad to see you so… comfortable, on my schip. I hafe to say, you caused quite ze commotion back zere, vhat vis ze slot machine and ze gold coins and makink my men look like fools.” He smiled. “I’m schure ve vill hafe quite ze time workink togezer, Mr… Solaire.”

Solaire stared him right in the eye. “I’m sure we will, Mr. Weiss,” he said, pronouncing the name “Wees”.

“It’s Weiss” he corrected, pronouncing it “Vice”.

“Wees” Solaire confirmed.

“No, Vice.”

“Wees.”

“Vice.”

“Wees”

“Vice”

“Wees.”

“SKYLER!” Weiss exclaimed, loud enough to make the man jump. “I hafe to say, of all ze people I expected to see down here, you were not one of zem.”

The man in leathers squirmed a bit. “Well, you know what they say, first time for everything… right?”

“And your lasht, one way or anozer,” Wiess said, nodding. “Disappointink zat you decided to srow all zat talent avay. You had quite ze fote of confidence from your former captain, and I could see vhy. Hook svords are a hard veapon to mashter, much less climb vis, nien?”

“They are.” Skyler’s face began to look hopeful. “Lot of time and talent went into that.”

“Schame zat you couldn’t hafe had more discipline elsevhere in your life.”

“L-look, maybe we could work something out, right? Public apology, pay you the money back, m-maybe we could discuss other forms of favors?”

“Yes, and zen I’ll let eferyone know zat mutiny isn’t serious and seft from me is okie-dokie. Maybe I schould shtart forgifink ze gamblink debts as vell?” Weiss rolled his eyes. “Honeshtly, you shtruck me as smarter zan zat, Skyler.”

Skyler’s eyes fell to the floor. Willaby looked at Skyler, then back to Weiss. “I’m sorry, but there must have been a mistake here, sir.”

Weiss turned to him. “Ah! And Villaby, vas it?”

“Er, Willaby, yes.”

“I hafe to admit, I hadn’t had ze pleaschure of meetink you before. Do you mind tellink me vho you are?“

“Well,” he stammered. “I-I’m a baker. Was a baker, I suppose. Place burnt down. Not sure why, come to think about it. L’homme de guimauve, it was called. Specialized in cakes and pastries. I was the pastry chef.”

Weiss nodded. “And a sorcerer.”

The eyes of Skyler, Tomo, and Austin went wide as they stared at Willaby, who began to nervously fidget from the attention.

“Well, I-I-I mean, that didn’t really come into play with the baking thing. It was more of a minor… thing… I could do… sometimes.”

“Minor thing?” Skyler exclaimed. “You were lucky enough to be born with magic and power literally in your blood, and you call that a minor thing?”

Solaire yawned.

Willaby’s expression went dark for a second. “It’s only a good thing if you can control it, and I was not given that ability.” He turned back to Weiss. “But surely there has been a mistake! I had nothing to do with this commotion, I swear!”

“Oh really?” Weiss asked. “Because accordink to our records, you lied to a crew member to hide Mr. Solaire here…”

“He was threatening me with a gun!”

“...got into a shcuffle vis ze crew member vehn he tried to enter…”

“I panicked!”

“...cast a shpell to obscure vischion to aid in his escape…”

“That was an accident. I can’t always control…”

“...shtabbed ze poor crew man after Solaire had left…”

“...what? No... I didn’t…”

“...and zen attempted to fight ze security forces in ze hallway.” Weiss smiled. “Vell, at least ve got ourselfes a sorcerer out of all zat chaos, nien?”

A look of horrified realization crossed Willaby’s face. “You can’t.”

“Can, did, and done!” Weiss glanced back to the vulture man. “Nov, Vinthrop, if you vouldn’t mind giving zese people back zere veapons and oser effects so ve can let zem go. Zey schouldn’t be a problem vis ze plates.”

Winthrop approached, lifted a large oblong bag off the floor and onto the table, and opened it up. “Tomo, would you please untie Mr. Skyler?”

Tomo unsheathed the katan and flicked faster than the eye could follow. The various ropes binding Skyler fell to the ground as he stood up, rubbing his wrist.

Wintrhop began withdrawing items and placing them on the table. “Two hook swords, one custom made revolver pistol, long barreled, and one custom made revolver pistol, short barreled.”

Skyler took the items and placed them back in his holsters, mumbling as he did so.

“Next, Mr. Willaby please.”

Tomo repeated the motion to Willaby’s chair as he unsteadily got to his feet.

Wintrhop studied his notebook. “Nothing”

Solaire looked at Willaby and raised an eyebrow.

His face turned a bright shade of scarlet. “I’m a baker on vacation!”

“Zat won’t do.” Weiss reached into his coat and pulled out a short wooden rod, cut into square and diamond-like patterns. “Here’s a shpell focus. Schould reign back your power enough for you to defend yourself magically, efen sough it’s cheap. Try not to oferload it.”

Willaby took it and oggeled it like a jungle native encountering a bar of soap for the first time.

“Lastly, Solaire?”

Tomo repeated the motion, and for just a second, Solaire saw the side of his neck, There under the skin, so old it had been healed over, was a foreign object. A slave plate, he realized, as he walked to the table.

“One custom made revolver pistol, broad barrel. Two single shot hold-out pistol attached to a spring-mounted vambrace…”

Weiss took one of the hold-out pistols off of the table before Solaire could take it. It was a small flintlock, welded to a brass extension arm that could be drawn back and clicked into place. He pushed and pulled the spring back for a bit before nodding approvingly and extending it towards Solaire, who immediately snatched it out his hands.

Winthrop cleared his throat. “Two revolver pistols, one pair of knuckle guards, three daggers, one cutlass…”

“Gods and demons” Skyler muttered.

Solaire saw him remove the very last item he had on him before he was captured: a long ivory cane. A long ivory cane with a sword hidden inside.

“Can we hurry this up?” Solaire interrupted before Winthrop could announce the last item. “I need to get out of here before I fall asleep from boredom.”

Winthrop looked at him confused. “I beg your pardon?”

“C’mon, you know, faster! Vamoos! Andele!” He thought for a minute. “Eedspay-upsay!”

“We have a process we need to…”

Weiss chuckled. “It’s alright, Vinthrop.” He took the cane out of his hands and handed it over to Solaire. “ Let’s let him safe zat fim and figor for ze job, nien?”

Solaire took the cane and held it at his side, his only ace up his sleeve left secret.

“I vill let you knov vhen you are needed, gentlemen.” Weiss gestured to the open door beside him. “Until zat time, you are free to avail yourselfes of ze room and board in ze crew quarters.” He smiled. “Enjoy your shtay at ze Emperor.”

***

After a brief meal of not quite the worst slop he’d ever had, but pretty close, and a sleep on a cot that ranked just above “tavern floor” in Solaire’s experience, he was back out and about the ship, taking in the sights, sounds, smells and feels of it, mentally cataloging every weakness he could find or think of.

So he’d gotten a little curious and things hadn’t gone exactly as he’d planned. So what? The mission was still the same. Find out where the information about River was kept, steal it, and sail away, preferably with a gunshot through the neck of that smug Eiswhen-accented son-of-a-bitch in the red velvet suit. And yes, now the ending of the plan had a few complications thrown into it, but at least he had a reliable alibi until he was ready to make his move. Who knows? Maybe he could even get into a few places a bit easier like this.

While making his way through the engine room, trying to understand the mess of pipes and valves and having absolutely no luck doing so, he spotted the familiar form of a large man in a green tweed suit standing a bit away.

“Hey! You there!” Solaire called out.

Willaby turned around, saw Solaire, and attempted to hurry off.

“Wait a moment.” Solaire jogged up to him and put his hand on his shoulder. “I’m glad I ran into you. I found the captain’s room, but it’s sealed with some kind of multi-stage lock I’ve never seen before.”

“M-hmm.” Willaby started to strode away.

Solaire kept pace. “It’d take me too long to pick it, so I thought that you could do whatever that magic voodoo you do to it. Maybe melt it off.”

“Mmm,” he responded. His tone became more terse.

“So if you just want to follow me…”

“What’s that?” Willaby’s gaze suddenly shot up and to the right, at something he couldn’t see. “You need my help over there? Way over there? And you need me to come alone? Will do, good sir!” He walked away from Solaire with a quick march, refusing to look back.

Solaire scratched his head. “What’s up with him?” He shrugged and turned up a staircase, heading to an upper deck.

Voices sounded from the landing above him, just out of his view. Curious, he slowed his pace and listened as he walked.

“Darrensby, would you just listen to me?”

“I did listen, and I told you no.”

Solaire turned a corner and saw Skyler arguing with someone he didn’t recognize on the staircase landing, though from the uniform, he could tell the other man was one of the ship hands. As he came into view, both of them stopped to look at Solaire.

“Oh, blast it to hell” Skyler groaned.

The shiphand sniggered. “Why don’t you ask your girlfriend there?”

Skylar glared at the man and grabbed a handful of his shirt, shoving him down the stairs. He caught himself easily and winked back at Skyler as he passed Solaire and descended the steps.

“What in the name of the abyss do you want?” Skyler spat at him.

“I found the captain’s quarters,” Solaire responded, “but I’m unfamiliar with the lock. Since you’ve been here for a bit…”

“Of course.” Skyler rolled his eyes and try to push his way past the pale noble. “Rot in hell, Solaire.”

Solaire stepped in front of him. “What is this about? This hostility. You and the tweed man, you both…”

“Tweed man?” Skyler’s stare shot daggers at Solaire. “You mean Willaby?”

“If that’s his name.”

“You want to know what’s wrong, Solaire? You ruined our lives. We’re pissed off at you. So if you’d please go away…”

“I did that?” Solaire thought for a moment. “Tweed might have a case, but I remember you being just as eager as me to get off this ship with that money.”

“Yeah, and you know what? I thought that meant working together. We could have escaped, easy, but when I turned around, my ally was nowhere to be found. Instead I had a whole other platoon of robots getting in line to stab me.”

“Well, that was your fault for trusting me.”

Skyler put his arm across Solaire’s throat and pushed him into the wall. “Until Weiss gets whatever that job is lined up for us,” he growled, scowling at him inches away from Solaire’s face, “I don’t want to see you. You get that?” He shoved himself off and walked down the stairs before Solaire could respond.

Solaire stood in the empty staircase for a moment before continuing his climb upwards.

***

There’s only so much searching any man can do in a day before his body makes a request for food, however vile, and so Solaire tore himself away from his task once evening fell to make his way back to the crew’s mess hall.

The large room was incredibly loud and crowded, with sailors and wait staff moving this way and that, shouting over each other and raccously laughing. Whatever revulsive white creamy stew they had served the day before was today’s dish as well, as people lined up to fill up their wooden bowl and move into one of the many long tables running the entire length of the hall.

“Hey, fairy man!” A sudden motion from across the room caught Solaire’s eye. It was a green lime, sailing through the air to hit Willaby on his back, who didn’t so much as turn around from his spot seated in the corner when it hit him. “Give us another dose of pixie dust!” A chorus of cruel laughter rang out.

Skyler stood up next to him and shouted back “Fuck off!”

“Oooh, I’m so scared,” the man at the table retorted back. “He might fight us. Here, is this enough?” The group began throwing copper pennies at Skyler, who stood there and fumed as the coins rained down upon them.

Willaby gently grabbed Skyler’s arm. “Forget it, it’s not worth it.”

Solaire sighed and walked over to the table of taunters.

The apparent ringleader of the group saw him walking over and nudged the others. “Hey, lookit. We’ve got the mastermind right here! Tell me, what’s it feel like to be smart enough to come up with a heist like that?” he shouted as the others howled.

“Why? Want some help filling the holes between your ears?” Solaire asked.

The laughter died down, replaced by stares of anger. The man got up from the other end of the table and walked around until he was inches away from Solaire’s face. “You think you’re clever, huh?”

“Not really,” Solaire said. “But among you lot, it sure makes me look like it.”

He nodded, turned back to his friends and nodded, then reeled back with a sudden wide swing aimed straight at Solaire’s head.

As Solaire watched the sailor telegraph his punch, he couldn’t help but feel disappointed. Schoolyard bullies fight the same everywhere, it seems.

Solaire ducked under the blow and lunged forward, driving his fist straight into the pit of the man’s stomach. Startled, he clutched his belly and leaned over in pain, allowing Solaire to move past him and drive his foot into the back of his thigh, toppling him onto the ground and giving the noble space to put his shoe onto the back of his neck.

Across the table, the man’s friends started to get up.

Solaire drew the Ivory River and aimed it at them.

The whole mess hall went silent.

“You stupid or something?” one of them snarled. “You got that shock plate on you. One call to Weiss and you’ll fry.”

“Go ahead,” Solaire invited. “Honestly, I’m curious how many how many of you I could take with me before I went down.” He twirled, moving open the flaps of his coat and revealing the small armory stored inside. “Enough to use all twenty bullets loaded, I’m sure. Then we’d have to get creative with the daggers. So, who wants to go fetch Weiss?”

You could hear a pin drop in the mammoth room.

“Right then.” He faced the rest of the mess hall. “Listen up you lily-livered arse-faced shit-for-brains collections of human waste! My name is Captain Solaire Ravenheart and these,” he gestured to Willaby and Skyler, “are my crew! Anyone has a problem with my crew, they take it up with me! Anyone who takes it up with me has a bullet from this gun in their future! Now did you all get that or would you like for me to repeat it slower?!”

The only reply was an awkward cough from the back.

“Good!” Solaire removed his foot from the man’s neck and knelt down next to him. “How about you?” he whispered. “We understand each other?”

The man quickly nodded.

“Excellent.” Solaire stood up, gave the man a swift kick in the side, and headed over to Willaby and Skyler. Slowly, the staring heads turned back and the conversation picked up again.

“You always make that much of an entrance?” Skyler asked.

“Usually.” Solaire responded, then sighed. “Listen, I know the two of you hate me. And you have every right, so hate me all you want. Hell, plot your revenge while you’re at it. But since we’re stuck together, we might as well work together while we’re here. Save the shouting and fighting and stabbing for when we’re off this ship, alright?”

Willaby and Skyler looked at each other, then back to Solaire.

“You… you want to sit here?” Willaby asked, pointing to the seat next to him.

Solaire shrugged. “Don’t see why not.” He picked up the lime from the ground, sat down, and began to peel it with a dagger as three of them sat together.

[sheikah]

Okay do i love Jonerys but do you think people would notice the chemistry if they didnt know about the leaks?

I absolutely believe they would, anon!!!

Look, I can’t speak for other people but I’ve loved this ship for YEARS without any leaks. Without even being a part of the fandom online.

I have already argued extensively here and here recently that Jon and Dany will be a good couple based on chemistry and compatibility. None of this has anything to do with plot leaks at all. I’ve thought they would work together based on their personalities and past experiences, and I think they were both very in-character for this episode. So there are a lot of things contributing to them working well on screen that have nothing to do with people already knowing the outcome going into it!

But just looking at the scenes themselves, yes! They had chemistry that was immediately noticeable. 

When they first meet, I’m talking the first few seconds, I think they have instant chemistry. When Dany speaks first and just says something nice about appreciating Jon making the journey and hoping it was a good trip, we get that cute ass little smile from Jon. 

She calls him “My Lord” and still this is his initial, instinctive reaction. To smile and let that go and still call her, “Your Grace” and thank her. From the outset, he likes her. (I’m not saying romantically yet of course.) But he is happy that she’s being kind and friendly and she is probably someone younger and prettier than he was expecting haha.

Of course moving forward things start to get heated, but even so I felt chemistry in their frustration. I mean, this camera shot was clearly meant to show a significant moment, the intensity of Dany being drawn to get up from the throne and speak to him face-to-face. 

Just like Jon himself tried to approach the throne right before that speak to her more closely but was threatened by the dothraki. 

And we get the stairs scene. My god, bless the stairs scene.

They are both changing their opinions about one another in an obvious way during this scene. When Dany mentions that they both have two brothers who have died, Jon’s look of sad understanding immediately softens the tensions between them and starts to put them on common footing. 

I also really love the moment when Dany says, “we all enjoy what we’re good at,” and Jon says, “I don’t.” (I gifed it here because I am obsessed :P) The look she gave him in that moment showed me that she was very interested and impressed, and she’s starting to see him as a person who has been through a lot, just like she has. A person who is trying to do right by his people, just like she has–and not because he likes it or wants credit, but because he feels obligated to do what’s right. She obviously respects that.

But my favorite moment comes when she agrees to let Jon mine dragonglass when he clearly wasn’t expecting her to give him one of his demands already. He is so visibly and obviously grateful and I think it’s a big step in the right direction for them :). (I gifed that, too. Again, obsessed lol).

I can even see chemistry in their arguing and anger, anon. How many times have we seen heated arguments turn into passionate makeouts on TV and in movies? It’s a pretty frequent thing. And I could see some serious frustration that I personally found hot when they were arguing in this scene. (Again, here’s a visual reference because I have no life :D)

I think the most obvious signs of chemistry come at the end of their interaction for this episode, though. Here we get Jon about to leave Dany to go and mine the glass. But he seems … a little indecisive for a man that hates this woman as much as the antis claim. He seems pretty torn, to me. Like he doesn’t want to leave her side. Again, I’m not so shippy that I think he is into her yet. But I think he definitely has a higher opinion of her than he did five minutes prior and he wants to get to know her better.

Okay I know these look similar but these are THREE SEPARATE INSTANCES OF JON SNOW STARING WISTFULLY AT DANY AND LINGERING/TURNING BACK BEFORE HE FINALLY FREAKING WALKS AWAY FROM HER. I mean??? That’s chemistry. I’m sorry but it is. He is so drawn to her already it’s insane. This song was playing in my head the entire time hahaha.

And Dany during this scene? She is staring determinedly forward, forcing herself not to look back and to appear aloof but you know deep down girl was dying under the scrutiny of Jon Freaking Snow. And how do you know? Oh, maybe by the fact that she also gave him the lingering stare treatment.

Not to mention that during this scene we get to hear the first bit of a musical theme that appears to be specific to Jon and Dany (here.) Having their own theme in itself suggests a relationship being built, but the sad, romantic sound of the music adds to the tone of the scene as well and helps the audience to see what’s happening here.Like … this ship has sailed. These two are definitely curious about one another and I can’t wait to see where it goes. I think chemistry is an understatement tbh. I love it so much :’)Anyway anon, I hope this is the answer you were looking for. I am happy to be a dissenting voice among the people loudly insisting that their meeting was just Dany being rude and Jon shutting her down. Because it was really something else entirely. 

We are so blessed :’)