#i love emotional abuse i love perpetual disrespect i love manipulation and disguised hate
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Love being reminded that no matter how hard I try or what I do for them that every single person in my family wants me to kill myself so so sooooo bad
#i only walked halfway across town in 40 degree weather to help you specifically it's fine#i love being lied to i love being ignored i love being used by people i thought cared just to learn theyve been lying for years for my labo#i love emotional abuse i love perpetual disrespect i love manipulation and disguised hate#and at least im out of weed so I can have a real proper fucking meltdown about it cause god forbid i help myself not hurt myself too#gonna be a super super fun couple days let's see what inside the shitty fucked up freezing molding box i live in makes it through!!!!!!!!!!#did i mention i cant keep it above 55 degrees in here in this weather during the day cause its a fun addition to my times#ive only been lied to about being given a heater for my efforts for *checks watch* two years of 'living' here#just wait til night falls thats when the REAL fun staying warm starts#id pay anyone $20 to shoot me in the heart if i had $20#also smth actually good happened this morn n i just realized i completely forgot n buried it under all this lovely pain and dissappointment#so cool i waited for literal weeks to have one good thing i worked hard for to happen and i dont even care anymore why do i fuckin bother
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