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polskiebagno · 2 years

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In an effort to procrastinate working on my thesis, here is a compilation of (some of) the best things I have ever read. Books that I read over and over again, short stories that I haven't been able to forget for over a decade, articles and essays and experimental writings that kept me up until 3am trying to figure out their meaning. Hopefully you can find something new here that you haven't read yet!

SHORTS:

A Collapse of Horses by Brian Evenson - a man discovers that his house changes every night, but he's the only one who can see it, and he soon finds himself unable to cope with it. I keep coming back to this one over and over. It's a beautiful tale of grief, doubt, loneliness, and I find that it means something else to me each time I read it. Would you have turned to look at the horses?

The Cafeteria in the Evening and a Pool in the Rain by Yoko Ogawa - a woman meets a mysterious man and his son, fascinated by the local cafeteria. Similar to A Collapse of Horses in a way I can't quite put in words. A sister story, perhaps, but less fantastical. If you've ever seen Posession this story made me think of the line about god being under a porch with a dying dog.

Star, Bright by Mark Clifton - journal of a father whose little daughter turns out to be a genius capable of mind reading and time travel. When I was a child I wasted hours trying to figure out her method in hopes it was real and I could travel like that too. Definitely an interesting concept.

Borrasca by C. K. Walker - a young boy moves with his family to a small town in the mountains, and soon after that his sister goes missing. Beautiful, sad, horryfing all at once. I remember at times forgetting that it was a horror story and getting lost in that little town only to be faced with that ending. Big, big TW for sexual abuse.

The Road Virus Heads North by Stephen King - a horror writer buys a bizzare painting at a yard sale, and weird things start happening. The only one of King's stories I ever enjoyed reading so I thought I'd add it.

The Eradication of “Talmudic Abstractions”: Anti-Semitism, Transmisogyny and the National Socialist Project by Joni Alizah Cohen - to quote directly from it, "2018 has seen a vast rise in anti-Semitic violence globally. Similarly, violence against trans people, and trans women of colour in particular, has continued to rise exponentially. Is there link between the simultaneous rise in anti-semitism, the resurgence of the far-right, and the rise in transfemicide? In this article Joni Alizah Cohen analyses the structure of Nazi ideology for the key to understanding the present crisis".

38 by Layli Long Soldier - a poem about the Dakota 38. I love that you can also listen to the author reading it, to fully understand what she was going for. Definitely a "food for thought" kind of read.

The Dutch Village Where Everyone Has Dementia by Josh Planos - a look at a village that is, in its entirety, a nursing home, and at how we treat dementia in general. I find the topic of memory loss to be incredibely fascinating so this was right up my alley.

The Freudian Coverup by Florence Rush - while we all know that Freud's ideas, especially the concept of Odipeus complex, are simply bullshit I don't think many of us know how close he was to actually understanding trauma. I certainly didn't before I read this, and I've been studying psychology for 5 years now. I don't know if I would say there was malice to his theory, but there certainly wasn't any honesty in it. TW for child sexual abuse. If you don't have a subscription you can use Sci-Hub to get access to this.

BOOKS:

Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card - a young boy is chosen as one of the children being trained to soon lead Earth in the fight against aliens. While at times hard to read because of the hardships and abuse all the children face, to me it's a beautiful tale of friendship and love and goodness of humanity that prevails even when faced with horrific circumstances. DO NOT watch the movie tho. Also I'm not a fan of the other books but if you're interested, yes, this is a start of a series.

Hotel Paradise by Martha Grimes - a 12 year old girl living in her family's run-down hotel in the middle of nowhere begins investigating the drowning of another girl that took place decades ago. I first read this series when I was 12 myself and since then this series has always felt like home. It's always summer there, and reading Emma's descriptions of her mother's cooking makes me feel like I'm sitting with her at the table. It's vivid and welcoming and the characters feel like they're your friends and it has been a pleasure to grow up with these books and see how my perspective on them changed. There are three more titles so far, but the story doesn't seem finished.

The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat by Oliver Sacks - a collection of tales of Sacks' patients with various neurological issues. Great read if you're interested in how the brain works, but even if neurology and psychology aren't your thing this is still a wonderful look at what makes us human. Sacks writes with such ease and beauty and you can sense the care he has for all his patients.

The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury - a whole collection of short stories, detailing the exploration and settlement of Mars in the years 1999-2026. If you're not feeling like reading the whole collection my personal favorite is The Third Expedition; it really scared me as a child and I never forgot it. And I would recommend looking into Bradbury's writing in general.

Revenge: Eleven Dark Tales by Yoko Ogawa - another collection of short stories that connect and intertwine and create a narrative comparable to a maze or a spider's web or one of those russian dolls that have another doll in them. You could theorethically just read them on their own but it takes away most of the fun of this book.

THE UNABOMBER PACKAGE:

Look, I wanted to put his manifesto on here because I do truly believe it's a super interesting read, but you need to have context. You can start with just the Wikipedia page, but here are additional things I highly recommend reading:

A Stranger in the Family Picture by Serge F. Kovaleski and Lorraine Adams - an article about his childhood, including some stories from his mother. Definitely biased but good start if you wanna go in a chronological order.

Harvard and the Making of the Unabomber by Alston Chase - written by another Harvard atendee it's a description of Kaczynski's college years and, most importantly, the very unethical psychological experiment he was a subject of.

Gender confusion, sex change idea fueled Kaczynski's rage, report says - definitely not as much info as I'd like but it's another snippet into just how many things were happening in his head and how he dealt with them.

Excerpts From Unabomber's Journal - it's very important that you read these and "hear" him talk, in his own words, about why he did what he did. Especially if you feel some sympathy for him after reading the previous articles it's important to read these and see who he really was. If you do not have a subscription to NYTimes just click Esc before it fully loads and before! the paywall popup appears and you can read it for free.

Prisoner of Rage - A special report. From a Child of Promise to the Unabom Suspect by Robert D. McFadden - longer than previous articles it's a pretty good summary of everything. Use the Esc trick again to read it.

To Unabomb Victims, a Deeper Mystery by George Lardner and Lorraine Adams - also a very important read. Given how much conversation is focused on Kaczynski himself and his life it is crucial to remember his victims and hear their voices.

Every Last Tie: The Story of the Unabomber and His Family by David Kaczynski - a book written by his brother. I found it to be surprisingly well-written and quite heartbreaking.

Industrial Society and Its Future by Theodore Kaczynski - finally, the manifesto. I am begging you to read this carefully and critically. Do your research and keep in mind his journal excerpts and the victim's stories when engaging with this. I understand how fascinating it is, I just wrote you a paragraph full of resources, but please. This man is not your friend.

BLOGS/WEBSITES/ONLINE PROJECTS:

Time Cube by Otis Eugene Ray - an archived website presenting Ray's ideas about time being... cubic. According to him each day is really four days at once, and he describes four important points in time and space - one where Jesus lives, one for Socrates, one for Einstein and one for the Clintons. Yes like Bill Clinton. The website is a mess and it is clear that Ray was not in his right mind while writing it. I recommend treating it like a scavenger hunt - there are different versions of the website, from different years, archived on the Wayback Machine, and there's plenty of tabs you can click. The text is chaotic, he changes fonts and colors, one minute he's talking about time the next he's yelling at you and calling god a queer. But every once in a while there will be a quote that just... moves you. So if you have some time to kill sit down, maybe have a drink, and search for some accidental poetry there, it's great fun. My personal favorite quote is "Without deed, word starves. Word god lends not a hand". You can also check out a lecture he gave at Georgia Tech in 2005.

What football will look like in the future by Jon Bois - totally normal sports article nothing to see here :) about football yes. Why would you ask. What else would it be about? (Seriosuly tho, I don't wanna spoil this, it's great fun to read this and try to figure out what is going on. I never came across any vision of the future similar to this one, it's very refreshing).

my father's long, long legs by Michael Lutz - a fairly classic short scary story, but with the added element of being interactive. It gets quite creepy once you go underground, but don't worry, there aren't any jumpscares.

#hi ok i spent way too much time on this so time to actually go read something i SHOULD read not what i WANT to read

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dynamicduoofstackie · 3 years

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I’m curious why SamBucky is so rare-ish in these streets when it comes to pairing Bucky with an MCU character? I get it, I get it, with the Stucky ‘end of the line’; we been teaming up since the comic book days spiel. I personally see Bucky and Steve as brothers after Captain America: The Winter Soldier cause it felt like Bucky was ready to adopt Steve after his mother, who was his only remaining family, died.

That’s me. I know everyone not going to see it in that light. But Bucky gives me big brother vibes whenever he has to save pipsqueak Steve in the MCU. Plus the original comics had Bucky as an adorable, little sidekick that would make you think reverse big brother and little brother, with Steve being the big brother and Bucky the little brother. I don’t read the comics so it might just me. No offense.

Is it really about the, Steve knew him longer thing? I mean other than possibly Natasha in the comics, Bucky has no clearly defined MCU love interests. Bucky was a flirt before he met Sarah Wilson, so him being able to flirt, just proves he’s coming into his own. I’m not saying he doesn’t like Sarah that way. But he also flirted with Peggy in the first Captain America movie because he’s a lady killer and was more than willing to take the two girls off Steve’s hand at the Stark Expo when Steve floundered. Steve/Tony I sorta get with the enemies to lover trope. The Bucky x Clint thing is really mind-boggling to me because there were no interaction between them in the MCU; so something must have happened in the comics. So okay... But the fact that Sam had more interaction with Bucky in the MCU and had a whole comic book series with him and Bucky shouldn’t have the ships OF SamBucky and Sam x Clint at a 700+ fanfic difference. Fandoms are so weird sometimes... anyway...

Sam and Steve are the only ones in the MCU who really interact with Bucky outside the strong and beautiful people of Wakanda. None of the Wakandians seem interested in Bucky, except in maybe a familial way. Like they found a stray cat, nursed and raised it; but the cat is still an outdoor cat that might visit from time to time, but is mostly out there doing its on thing. Just the feeling I get with how comfortable Bucky was interacting with Princess Shuri and/or the Dora Milaje. They respect him, fixed him, and let Bucky roam free.

Steve is somewhere on the moon or wherever, in The Falcon and Winter Soldier tv series and Sam is the only one willing to stay in contact with Bucky. Shoot in Endgame only Sam and Steve were Bucky’s only people because Steve protecting Bucky caused a rift between the Avengers. It was repaired, but Team Iron Man doesn’t know Bucky at all, and/or don’t seem interested. Team Captain America are either dead (Natasha), being with their family (Clint and Scott), or dealing with their own shit (Steve and Wanda). So that leaves Sam. That’s really no coincidence even though I’ll admit, Steve going to a support group to more Peggy instead of his two best friends that were recently missing was kind of shitty.

So again, getting back on track, why isn’t their more Sambucky love? We already know Stucky is default most popular in the fandom for Bucky pairing. But Sam, who has the enemies turn friends aspect about him and has been the only one, besides Steve, who openly tried to find Bucky. I mean what better love story is it for a man who went from thinking Bucky would be better off dead, to suddenly sacrificing his 9 to 5 and freedom to search for Bucky and help him escape the airport in Germany?

I mean SamBucky is one of the few ships that has a foundation of amazing content from Anthony Mackie and Sebastian Stan’s interactions with each other. Mackie and Sebastian literally went from play pretending like they couldn’t stand each other, to damn near needing someone to chaperone them in their interviews because they so random shit, flirt and love to be close. Sebastian has talked about Mackie more than any costar and Mackie has a wonderful knack for finding Sebastian on any red carpet event to compliment the hell out of him. They literally had a show created for the two characters because of that amazing chemistry and Sebastian even co-signed on it with this gem below.

The MCU was throwing Bucky and Sam together over and over again, way before they got their own tv series. They argued together, fought each other, tried to one up each other by ripping wings and dropkicking from the air. Even in the television show big-hearted Sam willingly allows Bucky to go on a top secret government mission with him. Checks in on him constantly to make sure he’s okay. The only one that defends Bucky against people like Zemo, Sharon and John Walker.

Sam really was the one person that helped put most of Bucky’s demons to rest in The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. He gave him the tough love he needed in the end. He gave him purpose. He teased him like he was a normal person and not a former, brain-washed assassin. Sam watched over Bucky because he wanted to. Steve never asked him to check on Bucky. Steve never asked Sam to help him find Bucky. Steve never asked for Sam to sacrifice his freedom and go to the raft just so Bucky and Steve could escape in the airport. Sam volunteered to do that all on his own because he saw how worthy Bucky was.

Why else would Sam have him on a top government mission? Why else would he try to bail out Bucky from jail or follow Steve and Bucky against his Avenger allies? Why else would he let Bucky talk him into let Zemo go? Or any of the other insane things they did together, unless he didn’t care?

And that’s what Bucky needs, someone to give a damn about him. Someone to text him and chase after him. Someone to defend him and remind him that he’s not the Winter Soldier anymore. Someone to offer him a place to stay and normalcy. Someone who isn’t afraid to introduce to his family or watch his six in a battle. Someone touch him because he knows Bucky’s been touch-starved or tease him because he’s not afraid to be next to him.

Sam knows this Bucky. The Bucky who was determined to give the Shield to Sam. The Bucky who dangled kids off his arm while talking to Sam’s sister. The Bucky who has trouble sleeping at night because he still has demons. The Bucky who tried to kill him because he didn’t have control of his own body The Bucky who was just as broken as Sam when Steve just Peggy over them. The Bucky who is trying to find purpose in a world that has forgotten about him. He doesn’t have to remake himself into the old Bucky for Steve because Sam only knows this Bucky. Bucky doesn’t have to be anybody, but himself around Sam and he is.

I mean maybe people don’t care to pair Bucky with Sam because he was against saving Bucky the first time; or didn’t pull up the car seat; or didn’t want to jump in believing Bucky after he threw him across the room by his chin; or maybe because Sam’s black... WHO KNOWS.

I just thought it was odd that the fandom doesn’t respect Anthony Mackie as a whole, too. Like the poor man has to insert himself into interviews with his white costars just to not be pretty arm candy. But that’s another rant for another post.

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fics-for-my-heart · 4 years

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Newbie (s.s)

Summary: Starting a new school with the ability to see that someone is supernatural takes a crazy turn

Word count:4069

Warning: talk of people dying, typical teen wolf stuff

A/N: I was going to put this all in one part but I think it’s going to be too long. So here’s part one. I might make it a series? There’s not too much romance in this but I definitely plan to make it happen soon. Let me know what you think. Also I’ve been watching Buffy which was why it was included in this.

Part Two

Masterlist

Starting a new school always sucked. But, starting a new school with the knowledge of the supernatural you had seemed to make it worse. Plus, your ability to see when someone was supernatural made things a bit awkward. Each supernatural gave off their own color, like an aura, and that’s what you could see. There was a good amount of supernaturals in your old town, but as you walked the streets of Beacon Hills you realized there were so many more.

“Have a good day sweetie.” Your mom said as you shut the car door. “Don’t let your sight get in your way. Make some friends.”

“I’ll try. Love you.”

“Love you! I’ll be at the shop if you need me.” Then she was gone, leaving you to watch everyone running around to get to friends or to class.

After checking in at the front office, the secretary, Mrs. Elle, took you to your first class. “Mrs. Hopkins is a wonderful English teacher. If you need any help throughout the day come see me.” She knocked on the door, then opened it to a room full of people, the teacher was at the board. A beautiful purple glow surrounded her.

Fairy.

“Mrs. Hopkins, this is Y/N Y/L/N. She just transferred here.”

Mrs. Hopkins gave a bright smile, walking over to shake your hand. “Lovely to meet you. We are just starting on The Great Gatsby. There’s only a few seats left but you can pick wherever you want.” She handed you a copy of the book, then spoke to Mrs. Elle.

When you looked up at the room, only a handful of people were looking at you, others were texting or reading. Your eyes scanned the seats, spotting one before the color around the boy beside it caught your eye.

Your brows furrowed. Since coming here you’d seen many colors you hadn’t categorized yet. But this one was different. It was deep purple, with black and red, and even some blues and greens. Normally there was one color, just different shades. Never this many.

The boy cocked his head to the side and you jumped a bit, realizing you’d been staring. With your head low, you made your way to the seat, feeling his eyes on you the entire time. To distract yourself, you plotted your classes on the little map, and when the bell rang you booked it out of the room.

The rest of the day was as good as any first day. Lots of stuff to catch up on, lots of new colors to try and match with a supernatural. But the boy from English took up most of your mind. Why did he have so many colors?

Your mind was racing as the school day drew to a close. The sun on your face felt so nice, and the calm breeze helped slow everything down. It gave you a moment of peace as you scanned the lot for your moms car. Then you saw him. He was at a table with two baby blues, a teal, and a scarlet. They looked like they were in deep conversation.

There was this weird pull in your gut, and before you could stop yourself you were walking toward them.

“It’s only taking their skin. Why?” The older looking baby blue said, he looked stressed. They all did.

The scarlet was running her fingers down a book, biting her lip.

The teal shrugged. “Maybe it just likes to eat the skin?”

Little baby blue just stared at her like she was nuts before big baby blue spoke up. “If it did we wouldn’t be finding discarded skin near the freshly skinned bodies.”

Your heart stopped. No. There’s no way.

“None of them look eaten, and the skin only has a line down their back. It doesn’t make sense. Stiles, has your dad said anything?”

The boy from English, Stiles, spoke up. “Not really. He said they seemed to have some type of film on them. Like they had been preserved in something.”

“Skincrawler.” You whispered, your heart pounding in your ears.

“Y/N?” Stiles asked. They were all looking at you as your eyes widened.

“I..uh.” You cleared your throat and tried to steady your breath. “Do they have a stab mark at the base of their neck.” They nodded and you were suddenly light headed.

“Shit,” Stiles jumped up, gently pushing you into his seat. “Guys this is Y/N. She’s in my English class.”

“What did you call this thing?” Scarlet asked. They were all still looking at you like you were crazy.

“A skincrawler.” You rubbed your face. “They kill someone and wear their skin.”

“Fuck.” Little baby blue whispered.

You shook your head. “You’re all safe. They don’t go after other supernaturals.” That earned you an even weirder set of looks. “You two are werewolves.” You nodded at the baby blues. “You’re part werewolf, part something else.” You nodded to teal. “And I’m not sure what you two are.” You said to scarlet and Stiles.

None of them spoke for a minute. Then big baby blue extended his hand. “I’m Scott McCall.” His eyes were red, such a contrast to his coloring.

“You’re an alpha.” You shook his hand and he cocked a brow. “I can see your true eyes.”

His hand slipped from yours, replaced with little baby blue, Liam, then teal, Malia. Scarlets name was Lydia. Then Stiles shook your hand, his grip was firm, and he held it while he spoke. “How did you know what they are?”

“Each supernatural has its own aura, my family is what they call True Seers. I can see the auras around you, and your true eyes. I’m the first in almost a decade so I’m pretty much learning on my own. Which is why I’m not able to identify yours.” You glanced at Stiles, Lydia, and Malia.

“I’m a Banshee.” Lydia gave you a soft smile then looked back to the book.

“Werecoyote.” Malia supplied with a shrug. “Both my parents tried to kill me so don’t ask.”

You looked up at Stiles but he shook his head. “Just your average human here. Which doesn’t seem like a good thing with these skin guys walking around.”

It didn’t make sense that he wasn’t a supernatural, but there were more pressing things to address.

“Are these like the skinwalkers? Because I’ve seen them and I don’t think they would do this.” Scott questioned, turning to look at you.

You shook your head. “No. Walkers are non threatening. The crawlers, as you can tell, aren’t. And they are hard to locate. When they stab the person, not only does it kill them, but it seems to transfer all their memories. So even though it’s still the monster inside. It looks and has the same mannerisms as the person it killed.”

“How do we stop it?” Malia asked, she looked ready for a fight.

A shudder ran down your body at the memory of when you last saw this creature. “It’s not easy. First you have to know how many there are. They are stronger packs. Then you have to find out where they are staying. But even harder you have to find out who they are wearing.”

Scott rubbed his face, everyone was looking at him, waiting for his directions. “We need Derick and Argent. Maybe Parish too.”

“I’ll go to the library and see if I can find anything out.” Lydia said, having no luck with the current book. “Where are we meeting?”

“The loft, at seven.” Scott turned to you. “Would you come? You seem to know more about them than we do. We could use your help.”

You glanced around at them. A group of friends who were closer than close. Had clearly been through a lot. “Yeah. Yeah. Just give me the address.”

“I can pick you up.” Stiles said quickly, stumbling over his words when everyone turned to him. “I mean. It’s kinda hard to get to that first time. It would be easier for someone to give you a ride.” His ears turned pink as Lydia and Malia shared a look. Scott was trying to hold his grin. But Liam was flat out laughing at him.

Before you could respond a horn honked, followed by your mom calling your name. “Here.” You tore a piece of paper and quickly wrote your address and number down. “Just let me know when you get there.”

As you walked away you could hear the low voices talking at once followed by Stiles. “You guys suck I’m going home.”

—

You shared everything with your mom on the way home. Even though she wasn’t a true seer, everyone in her family got trained in case it appeared later in life.

“So this true alpha has a mixed pack?” She asked, dropping the box of books on the table.

“Yes. There’s definitely a lot of stuff they have been through. I could feel how strong their connection was.” You started thumbing through the first book, your mom following suit with her own.

“And this Stiles boy, he said he wasn’t supernatural?”

“Yeah. I can’t even begin to explain the way the colors were around him. It was like someone spilled a bunch of paint. Very chaotic.” You closed the book, having no luck. “I don’t think the book is in here. I think it’s with Buffy.”

Your mother examined the books, then nodded. “I think so. I’ll give her a call. But you should probably go get it tonight if she has it.”

“Can I take the car?” You asked, slightly excited about getting to go see someone who was pretty much your Aunt but you get to drive.

Your mom nodded. But before you could say anything your phone vibrated

Maybe Stiles: Y/N? It’s Stiles. I’m outside. I think.

You: Okay, I'll be out in a sec.

"Stiles is here." You told your mom as you slipped into your jacket. "Just have Buffy text me if she has the box." You gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. "Love you."

She opened another book. "I will. I'll also keep looking and see if I can find anything. I know there was something in one of the books last time, I just have to remember which one. And I love you too. Be safe."

You slipped your bad over your shoulder and headed out where a blue jeep was waiting. Stiles was in the front seat tapping his fingers and singing to whatever was playing. He was wearing a maroon lacrosse hoodie and his hair looked more disheveled than it did at school. His tapping stopped when you opened the door and Should I Stay or Should I Go was playing. His voice died off as he looked at you standing in the door.

"The Clash? Good choice." You said as the song came to an end, and a new one began. "Oh, and Fleetwood Mac?"

Stiles shrugged, taking your bag for you as you climbed in. "Can never go wrong with some classic rock."

"That is very true. I think I might like you a bit now Stiles." His colors were dimmer than they had been at school, which was normal, the sun always made them brighter. They were much less distracting this way too. "So, is there anything I should know before we get to this mystery loft?"

"There's a lot you should know. But the drive isn't long enough for everything, so I'll give you the rundown." He pulled the jeep from the curb and started talking.

He told you who Derek, Argent, and Parrish were and how Scott and Liam turned. But that was about as much as he could get in before pulling into the parking lot of what looked like an abandoned warehouse. So many questions were running through your mind as you looked up at the building. "Funny, a werewolf living in a warehouse."

Stiles laughed, then nodded to the door. "I swear the loft is so much better inside."

He was right. When he pulled open the huge metal door it revealed a beautiful open space full of natural light and people. Four you had already met, three you had names for but not faces.

Scott was quick to introduce you to the other three. Derek was obviously a werewolf with his baby blue coloring that matched his eyes. Jordan Parrish was the first human hellhound you've met, and his color was exactly like fire.

Argent was the only one without a color. "A True Seer?" He asked, shaking your hand. "I've only met one other person with that ability. Welcome to Beacon. Scott said you knew something about these things?"

"We fought a group of them when I lived in Sunnydale. I know we had some literature on them, my mom is looking through our books, but I think I think they might have gotten left at my Aunt's house. Once I know though I’m heading there to get them.”

Argent nodded, then pointed to the map. “We have a rough pattern. And based on the bodies I think we might be dealing with just one.”

“What do you know about the people who have been killed?” You asked, noting the four red circles on the map that seemed to form a shape.

“Not a lot.” Parrish spoke up, opening a file. “All different ages. Different builds. There doesn’t seem to be a pattern here. But we are still searching through their backgrounds. So far the only possibility is they knew each other or went to the local church.”

You nodded. “They liked to go after people who knew each other. How often are bodies turning up?”

“Every two weeks or so. The last one was the day before yesterday.” Stiles answered, your phone buzzed.

Buffy: The books are here. Fill me in on what’s happening.

You: I’m coming to you. Be there soon.

“My Aunt has the books. Is it okay if I take a picture of this? I think I can get some extra help.” You asked nodding to the map.

"Yeah. The more help we can get the better." Argent said, stepping back as you angled your phone for a picture.

"Is there anyone missing from the school?" Derek asked, looking at the others.

Lydia shrugged. "Not sure yet. There were a few people out today, but they could have just been normal reasons. I'm keeping an eye on everything."

"We couldn't get a scent from the body." Malia added, giving a shudder. "I think I might have nightmares for weeks."

“I didn’t see anyone there with the color for them. It’s kind of a deep grey color. Even when they switch skins the color is still there.” You looked at Stiles, his brows were pinched and he was working his thumb with his teeth as he looked at the map. "Hey," you whispered as the others discussed the body. "Could you drive me home. Buffy has the books so I need to get to Sunnydale."

His brown eyes met yours, the concentration making him look adorable. "Huh? Oh, yeah." He looked up at the others. "Guys, I'm going to take Y/N home so she can go get the books."

After some quick goodbyes the two of you made your way back to the jeep.

"If you want, I can take you there?" Stiles said, his hand was rubbing at the back of his neck.

You stopped and looked at him. "To Sunnydale?"

"Yeah. It's late, and well, I'd feel safer away from here." He shrugged. "Plus it's late."

"You said that." You laughed. "If you want to drive me that's alright."

"Awesome." He jumped in the jeep, waited for you to get in and buckled, then looked over at you. "So, how do I get to Sunnydale?"

------

"Okay, wait. Like, a full, legit deadpool?" The two of you were almost there, and Stiles had started filling you in on everything they had experienced.

"Yes. That's how we found out that Parrish was supernatural. He was on the list. Peter, is the one who put the list out. He used another banshee to set it all up."

"So, if I ever meet Peter can I punch him?" Even though you'd just met this group you felt oddly protective of them.

"He is kinda neutral right now, but honestly, go for it." He winked at you. "So is there anything I should know before we get there?"

"Well, yes. Buffy isn't really my aunt, but she feels like one. She's the slayer. Spike might be there, he's a vampire. Willow, she's like my other aunt, she's a witch." Excitement started building as you saw the sign for the exit.

He was silent for a moment, then he said slowly. "Vampire?"

"He won't try anything. He knows I can take him, but also he's fairly harmless."

Stiles rubbed his lips. "Vampire."

"Yes. Turn left up here." You said. He followed your directions, eventually pulling in front of the house you spent much of your childhood. "You okay?"

"Uh. Yeah. I'm still processing I think."

You placed your hand on his arm. "I promise you it'll be fine. But if you want, you can stay in the car."

He shook his head, removing the keys. "Lets go."

All the lights were on as you made your way to the house, Spike was standing in the open door.

"Hello, Little Bit." His British accent was familiar and a sudden wave of homesickness hit you.

You ignored it though, rolling our eyes. "Shut it you loof. The skin crawlers are back, we don't have time for your shit."

He placed a hand on his chest. "Your words wound, missy." His eyes traveled behind you. "Who's the bloke?"

"Spike, Stiles. Stiles, Spike.” You pointed at Spike. "Be nice." You grabbed Stiles' hand and led him into the house, avoiding Spike's attempt to ruffle your hair. The others were already waiting in the dining room.

You quickly introduced Stiles to everyone. Then jumped right into what you knew.

“I went by the crypt.” Spike said after you’d told them the last of the information. “It didn’t look like anything escaped. Place is still rubble.”

“Wait.” Stiles leaned his elbows on the table. “How exactly did you guys kill these things last time?”

“Blew them up.” Willow shrugged, flipping through a book.

Stiles fell back into his chair and looked at you. “Blew them up?”

“Buf has army connections so we were able to… acquire some top grade stuff.” You told him. You could tell he was trying to process all of this, he was really cute.

“Argent might have some connections.” He nodded as if he was coming up with a plan.

You let him be and flipped open a book, your heart immediately stopping. Before saying anything you looked back at one of the pictures you had taken.

“Shit. Shit shit shit.” You dragged your finger down the page as you read. “This is bad.” Everyone was looking at you as you pointed to the diagram in the book. “A resurrection ritual.”

“Bloody hell.” Spike said, jumping from his chair, heading straight to the little bar table.

Willow paled, pulling the book to her and muttered something under her breath.

“Uh. That doesn’t seem like a good thing.” Stiles said.

You turned to him, your heart was pounding. “The skincrawler is doing a resurrection ritual. Basically it’s trying to bring something back from the dead. Probably the ones we killed.”

“Okay that sounds really bad.”

“It says here it has to make five sacrifices around a power source.” Willow said. “But it’s not doing it over the Hellmouth so what’s in Beacon Hills?” She looked over at Stiles. You opened the picture of the map, examining it closer, trying to find the pattern.

“The Nemeton.” He whispered, struggling to get his phone out of his pocket. After pressing around there was the trill of a call.

“Stiles? It’s late.” Argents' gruff voice filled the room.

“I know I know. Listen. I need you to go to that map. I need you to go to it and tell me what’s in the middle of those points.”

“A star!” You shouted. “They need five points. There are four on here. If you trace a star you can find the next dump site and the middle.”

There was rustling on the phone, then, “Shit.”

“It’s The Nemeton isn’t it?”

“Yeah. It’s The Nemeton.” There was some more noise from the other side of the phone. “I’ve got a rough guess where the next dump site will be. I’ll tell the others.”

“So The Nemeton is a real thing?” Willow asked, amazement all over her face.

You raised your hand. “Excuse me, what is that?”

“Short version? A supernatural ritual site created by Druids. It’s what makes Beacon Hills a beacon for the supernatural.”

“I thought they were a myth.” Willows eyes were dazed as she zoned out.

“So you’re telling me I moved from the demon hotspot Hellmouth to the literal beacon for the supernatural? Unbelievable.”

"It's very real. Sometime I'll tell you the story of how it awoke and got so much power. But right now we need to get back." He looked incredibly worried.

"It's late." Buffy said, she and Spike had been talking in the corner quietly. "You guys should stay here and sleep for a few hours before driving back."

Spike nodded. "I agree, Little Bit. There's still a few days till you should really worry. Sleep a bit and head out at sunrise."

As he spoke, you could feel the exhaustion suddenly weighing on your body. "He's right. Let the others scope out some stuff while we catch some shut eye."

"Your room is still made up. Go sleep and I'll make you guys breakfast in the morning."

You nodded, and silently led Stiles up the steps. He’d been quiet, worry was all over his face. He sat down in the desk chair, lip between his teeth.

“They will be okay.” You said softly, moving the pillows off the bed.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. We defeated them once, we can do it again. Really Argent is the only one to worry about there, he’s not a supernatural. Plus they are very time oriented. They stick to the same schedule when it comes to changing.”

After a moment he spoke again. “Uh. Do you want me to sleep on the floor?”

There wasn’t much space in the small room so you shook your head. “You can sleep in the bed. You’re driving so better rest is safer.”

The two of you were quiet as you took turns in the bathroom, then getting situated in the bed.

“Ya know,” you said after a few minutes in the dark. “If you had told me that on my first day of another new school I’d meet more supernaturals, find out the skincrawlers are back, and share a bed with a guy I just met that morning. I’d think you were crazy.”

“I’ve learned to just ride out the crazy. Trust me, it’s easier to do that than to try and fight it.” His head turned toward you, voice just above a whisper. “Why did you seem so freaked about the skincrawlers?”

You were suddenly very thankful for the dark. “They got one of my best friends. It was how we found out about them actually. She went missing for a day or so and when she came back she had this Grey color around her that hadn’t been there before. And her eyes seemed empty. Like everything about her was still her. But her eyes.” A shudder ran through you. “It used the knowledge from her to taunt us, me. Things got ugly. The boom.” You wiped the tear off your cheek, turning to see his silhouette in the dark. “If it’s just one, and we get it before it completes the ritual, it’ll be fine.”

“I’m...I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“It’s fine. I have faith in us. With the information we take back, it’ll help. Let’s get some sleep though.” Even though you said it, you stayed awake long after Stiles' breath evened out. Images of your last run in with these nasty things running through your mind. There was no peaceful sleep.

#stiles stilinski #teen wolf stiles #stiles fanfiction #teen wolf #dylan obrien #dylan o'brien

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caseyscartwright · 5 years

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My thoughts on 13RW Season 3 (SPOILERS)

So I binged 13RW yesterday and I have a lot of feelings about it.

What I liked:

Tyler: His storyline was my favorite part of the whole season. I feel like they handled it well, I still think they fucked up by showing the rape so graphically last season, but this season his arc was handled with proper care. I cried really hard when Tyler told Clay what happened to him, when he told Jessica, and when he stood up in the assembly and admitted that he was a sexual assault survivor. Watching Tyler find friends and happiness was so satisfying. I’m glad he made up with Cyrus and the punks, and that Zach finally gave him a chance. Devin Druid proved he’s a wonderful actor and shined like the star he is.

Jessica: I’m super proud of Jessica for becoming an advocate for victims and survivors herself, for standing up against Bryce and Monty, for being there for Tyler (seeing two sexual assault victims come together was super important), her scene with Mrs. Baker was also incredible. I’m still not crazy about Jessica and Justin as a couple, but I’m glad Jessica has found herself again and is able to have a positive sex life after what she went through.

Tony: I didn’t expect the ICE storyline with Tony and his family, but it was very emotional and it hit me really hard. I’m glad Caleb was there for Tony and I love their sweet, supportive relationship. Clony was back! I love that they shared ‘I love yous’ and that the friendship went back to its old roots.

Justin: I won’t lie, when he admitted to Jessica what happened to him, I was shocked. That was a beautiful scene and I’m super proud of Justin for opening up. His brotherhood with Clay was also on point this season, and I hope he can officially be adopted in season 4.

Clay: Clay has a heart of gold, and this season proved that, AGAIN. I love how loving and supportive he was towards Tyler, and how he was there for him. His scenes with Mrs. Baker were also moving and reminded me how much I miss Hannah.

Mrs. Baker and Jessica not forgiving Bryce: I feel like this is important to address. Yes, Bryce regretted his actions and apologized, but just because someone apologizes doesn’t mean they should be forgiven. Bryce caused A LOT of damage to multiple people, and no matter how sorry he was, the damage was done. Everyone has the right to apologize, but no one is entitled forgiveness and I’m glad both women didn’t change their minds about him. I also thought the scene between Olivia and Mrs. Walker was well done.

Zach being a good friend to Chloe: I’m glad it didn’t turn romantic and that Chloe was able to make her own decision not to have the baby. She’s young, in high school, and has plenty of time to be a mom or not, that’s up to her.

Alex, Jessica, and the killer reveal: After all that wait, the reveal did not dissapoint. Bryce was a fucking dumbass, Alex was helping him get up and he sealed his fate by threatening Zach and Jessica, so Alex pushed him and he and Jessica watched him drown. Well, bye, bye, dude. Oh, and I’m happy Jessica said Alex was her best friend and the ‘FML Forever’ moment was perfect.

What I didn’t like:

Ani, her hypocrisy, and the weird Clay/Ani/Bryce love triangle: So Ani becomes friends with Jessica, knows Bryce is her rapist, but still hooks up with him and has this whole flirty, romantic comedy relationship with him and barely gets called out for it??? I feel like Jessica should have been allowed to tell her to fuck off and stop defending her rapist. Ani spent the entire season accusing everyone of killing Bryce, defending him and talking about “the other side of Bryce”, and I found myself rolling my eyes so many times at her I lost count (and she also accused Jess of sleeping with Bryce... UGH). HE’S A RAPIST!! Why would anyone want to sleep with and be nice to a rapist? I kept waiting for her to reveal that maybe Bryce reminded her of someone she knew, or that she was messed up and that’s why she was with him, but zero, nada. I feel like that ‘relationship’ was there to add more drama, and to make Clay pissed, which he was right to be. This isn’t the same as Clay being mad about Zach/Hannah, this is VERY different, I’d also lose my shit if my friend/crush was dating a known rapist. I don’t know why Clay still chose to be with her after all her Bryce stanning, and after she accused him of being a murderer. I know Ani ended up helping at the end, but the whole ‘triangle’ was weird and it made me super uncomfortable. She was a hypocrite for protesting against rapists while dating and defending one. Anyway... I missed Hannah Baker.

Bryce ‘Cry me a River’ Walker: Yes, Bryce was sorry. Yes, sometimes pieces of shit like him regret their actions. But Bryce was a serial rapist, and showing 15 scenes of him crying/suffering didn’t change my opinion of him. He still raped girls, he still bullied kids, and I think it’s up to the audience’s interpretation whether you think someone like him deserves another chance. Like I said before, I believe you don’t have to forgive your abuser if you don’t want to, and no matter how much a bad person tries to atone for their sins, the damage is done. But anyway, I don’t want to talk about Bryce anymore, his dead corpse can rot now.

Monty: So... Monty was gay. I think making the violent rapist a guy who was dealing with internalized homophobia was... a choice, but at least they gave us a positive gay couple with Tony and Caleb. Yes, Monty had a horrible father and problems of his own, but he still chose to hurt Tyler and be a bully, so I don’t forgive him, and I don’t care that he was framed for Bryce’s death or killed in prison. Good riddance.

Bryce calling out Monty for being a rapist was like watching Ch*rles M*nson call out T*d B*ndy for being a serial killer.

That said... Justin Prentice and Timothy Granaderos are brilliant actors and I respect them.

Missing characters: Not enough Courtney. No sign of Sheri or Nina (who were also survivors and it would have been so powerful to have them in the scene where Jess gives her speech and be part of the HO group). Scott Reed was also MIA, and tbh he wasn’t much of a character in season 2, but he had ties to Bryce and Monty, so seeing him this season would have been interesting. I think Charlie took over his ‘helpful jock’ role this season, but I did like Charlie, so that’s good. I still don’t know what happened to Marcus, but oh well, who cares.

There’s probably more stuff I’m forgetting, but hey, this season was A LOT, so can you blame me? Season 4 hurry up, because I do want to see how all of this ends.

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camillemontespan · 5 years

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the golden boy [interview with leo rhys]

I wrote this a month ago and after editing, think I’m ready to post it. No reason for this other than it’s Leo!

@fromthedeskofpaisleybleakmore @jovialyouthmusic @sirbeepsalot @pug-bitch @moonlightgem7 @emceesynonymroll @burnsoslow @ibldw-main @emichelle @katedrakeohd @notoriouscs @thecordoniandiaries @gardeningourmet @dcbbw @of-course-i-went-to-hartfeld @be-still-my-aching-heart @rainbowsinthestorm

*********************************************************************************

When I come face to face with Prince Leo of Cordonia, his smile reminds me of the quote from F Scott Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby: It understood you just as far as you wanted to be understood, believed in you as you would like to believe in yourself, and assured you that it had precisely the impression of you that, at your best, you hoped to convey.

Leo has that smile. It lights up his face and makes me feel all gooey and warm. We meet on an Autumn day at a coffee shop on the square and he enters the shop wearing a brown leather jacket, black woolen sweater, jeans and boots. He looks like an off duty model, not a prince. He ignores those who turn to stare at him and greets me with that smile and a kiss on the cheek.

'Sorry I'm late,' he says, before settling down on the chair opposite me. The waitress comes over to take our order, blushing as she asks what he would like. 'I'll have a latte,' he says, giving her the same smile he gave me, 'and the lady will have?' he gestures to me. I ask for a cappuccino.

'Sorry, I did read your email but I've forgotten your name,' he tells me, wincing apologetically.

'Carmen,' I say. He flashes me a wolfish grin. 'Nice to meet you, Carmen.'

I gather together my notes but can't help but feel like he is watching me. I look up and he is, his arm draped over the back of his chair, that smile on his face. He is all golden skin and golden hair; a Greek god come to life. I clear my throat and ask how he's settling back into Royal life after spending years away travelling.

'It feels good!' he enthuses. 'Honestly it's nice to kinda be settled and spend time with good people. It's awesome seeing my little brother again.'

His little brother is King Liam. Three years ago, Leo was the one with the crown on his head until he suddenly announced he was abdicating. He left Cordonia and his brother took the throne and crown, looking like a deer caught in headlights.

Leo has the decency to look guilty when I bring the subject up. When the waitress comes back with our coffees, he looks relieved for the distraction.

'Okay, I'm an honest person,' he says. 'An open book. I'll tell you anything and to be honest, I do regret leaving my brother in the lurch like that. But I was in no way fit to be a king. I never have been.'

I ask if he could elaborate. He fixes me with his forest green eyes. 'Carmen,' he says, 'look at me. You know it, I know it, everyone knows it. I'm a reckless irresponsible asshole who would have run Cordonia into the ground if I was given absolute power. Trust me, I may have gone about it the wrong way but I made the right decision.'

Leo is the party boy of the Royal family. Much like Prince Harry in the UK, he spent his early twenties drinking, running around with girls and acting like there was no tomorrow. Leo smirks at the comparison with Prince Harry.

'Thing is, Prince Harry was the second born, the spare. He is never going to be the king which was why he could pull all that shit when he was younger. That said, I don’t condone dressing up like a WW2 figure -you know who I mean- Jesus, have some fucking decorum... But I didn't have that luxury of being the spare but I sure acted like I did. It should have been Liam going out till 7am every night but it wasn't. It was me.'

Prince Harry is in his thirties now with a wife and baby. Has Leo grown up?

'Do you see me with a wife and kid?' he jokes. He smiles and sips his coffee before answering.

'I think I've turned over a new leaf but don't quote me on that.'

He had been engaged to Duchess Madeleine but that ended abruptly, at the same time he abdicated. Has he seen her since he's been back? Leo runs his hand through his blonde hair awkwardly.

'Okay so you know how I said I'm an open book? Yeah, scratch that. Maddie is off limits in this conversation.'

He must still care for her if he calls her Maddie.

'Actually, I don't,' he says shortly. 'We've moved on. She's dating, she's happy. I just don't think she would appreciate me talking about her. She likes her privacy.'

I feel myself turn red. He's told me off. His eyes soften and he gives me an apologetic smile. 'Sorry, Carmen,' he says. 'I didn't mean to be a dick.'

We brush past the awkwardness and I ask him if he's dating. He chuckles. 'I'm seeing people.'

People. So not just one. Clearly, he isn't settling down just yet.

'I can't be pinned down,' he says. 'I'm actually a terrible boyfriend.'

I ask how.

'Ugh, God. I make promises I don't intend to keep. I believe the best way to fix an argument is just buy the girl something sparkly instead of talking about feelings. I take forever to answer texts. I choose a night out with the guys over a romantic night in. I’m always late. Shall I go on?'

So this new leaf he thinks he's turned over. If he's not settling down, what's changed?

'I'm actually staying in Cordonia permanently,' he answers. 'A year ago, I would have hated the idea of putting down roots and settling but now, I'm happy to be home. I want to make up for lost time and make amends to my brother. I know I can be an asshole but I am actually a good person underneath it all. I've learned the hard way that my actions have consequences and I don't want to treat those I love like shit again.'

He gives me a happy smile. ‘Liam is doing so good,’ he says. ‘I’m honestly so proud of him. He’s really turning Cordonia into a modern place and he listens to the people, you know? He genuinely cares. I’m glad I’m back with him.’

Who is he close with at court aside from Liam?

'Maxwell Beaumont is the fucking MVP,' he says, a broad smile forming on his tanned face. 'Honestly, he's the best. We bonded over his love for planning a Beaumont Bash. You know I love a party. We've joked that we should start our own party planning business.'

He then begins to list other famous faces at court. 'Drake Walker is my brother’s best friend but we get on well. He's changed so much since I was away, I mean he's married now! I always thought he would end up living in someone's basement like a weird uncle.. But no, he's married to Camille [the Duchess of Valtoria] and they have a baby. It's insane.'

I ask if he's close with Olivia Nevrakis, Liam's childhood friend. He smirks. 'Define close?'

I blanch at his suggestiveness. 'Are you guys..'?

He laughs and takes a swig of coffee. 'Ha! As if I'm telling you that! I mean, I would but Olivia would castrate me with her favourite dagger if I said anything.'

There wasn't any denial. Leo sees me trying to work it out and chuckles. He chuckles a lot by the way, like he is in on the joke and just waiting for everyone else to catch up.

'I'm dating people, she's dating people,' he says. 'Why label anything? What is the good in doing any of that? I've had so many women believe they could change me, make me into the boyfriend they wanted and needed. They always asked me about a month in if we could talk about ‘what we are’ you know, like, define the relationship. Nothing terrifies me more than that conversation.’

I tell him that sometimes, it’s just nice to know where you stand with someone. Leo throws his hands in the air, becoming really animated now. ‘But surely, the fact I’m taking you on dates and having sex with you is enough of an indication! Why are women like this?! If I’m fucking you, then be happy.’

‘Sometimes, women want to know if they’re dating a man or a boy,’ I say.

‘Are you saying I’m a boy?’ Leo asks me, raising an eyebrow - he is smiling though. He launches back into his subject.

‘I've started to just be brutally honest from the get go. I'm not the guy you can come to for deep conversations. I'm not going to text you good morning. If you want mindless fucking with some fancy dinners thrown in, I'm your guy. Otherwise, I'll just end up disappointing you.' His voice goes quiet .'Why deny the inevitable?'

His expression turns dark until he sees me and smiles again. 'You dating anyone, Carmen?' he asks me. I say no. He gives me a wink.

'They're missing out,' he says. He then gets serious again. 'As I said before, I learned the hard way that my actions have consequences. That's also why I'm now honest with women I might date. That new leaf again. I used to not be honest and go along with it, string them along but that's cruel. There's no need to be that kind of guy.`

Is he a feminist?

'Women should rule the fucking world,' he announces. 'Honestly, you guys are brilliant. I love women. The ones I know at court are strong and independent, they are powerful. Besides, if you believe that women and men should be equal, then you're a feminist. If you think women deserve to miss out on a promotion or pay rise because they have vaginas, then you're an asshole.'

So if he loves them so much, why does he treat women and relationships like they're nothing?

He blinks at my bluntness. I think I've definitely overstepped, until he leans forward. I catch the scent of his cologne. He smells expensive.

'Maybe I used to treat women like crap because I wanted them to dump me before I hurt them,' he whispers. 'Think of it like a weird armour.'

Has he got any chinks in this armour of his?

He gives me a wry smile. 'I love it when a woman challenges me. I like women who go toe to toe with me, who don't take my shit. Its refreshing. And so fucking sexy.'

His green eyes are steady on mine. I ask who his celebrity crush is.

‘Ha, what am I, thirteen?’ he laughs. Shaking his head, he smiles. ‘Fine, I’ll bite. Jessica Rabbit.’

I blink. ‘Um, she’s fictional..’

‘She’s still famous though. You think I’m kidding? She’s a fucking babe.’

I note that he didn’t pick a real life woman. I wonder if that’s because he doesn’t want to admit feelings for someone real, even if it is just a fun game. He sees me studying him and sips his coffee before interrupting my thoughts. ‘Carmen, there’s no use in trying to analyse me. There’s a lot of fucked up shit going on in here.’ He points to his head and chuckles.

I change the subject. He has been travelling for the past three years. What's been the best place he's been to?

His face lights up. 'Aw man, so many! Okay, so I went to Bali for a month which was incredible. Prague is pretty awesome, really cheap beer, I love Havana for the laidback vibe and how it’s so untouched. They have the best cars. I also tried a cruise but Jesus, that was really weird..'

Does he prefer to travel solo?

He nods. 'I can just do my own thing. There's nothing better than waking up in your own camper van with a view of the mountains in front of you and no plan. It was so freeing.'

Leo would have felt trapped as the king of Cordonia. That is obvious. Is that why he always flouted the rules?

Leo smirks. 'Rules are meant to be broken baby.'

I ask him to be serious. Leo sighs. 'Yeah. I hated this gilded cage that I was born into. A life of decorum, etiquette and restrictions is not a life I wanted, I never did. But I know there's so many people out there who have been dealt shitty cards. You've got poverty and homelessness. They've got it worse. So I shouldn't complain. But I just always wished I could be normal.'

Leo being a commoner? I can't imagine it.

Leo corrects himself. 'I tried to act normal given my life situation. I went out with girls, got drunk, did non-princely things. But being who I am.. It doesn't fit. I will always be Prince Leo, one time King of Cordonia. I will never escape that. I will never be a normal guy... It just look me a while to realise that. '

Does he regret any of his partying and the constant headlines? He nods. 'Yeah, I do. It wasn't easy for Liam. I think me acting like I did forced my brother to grow up quickly, which was unfair. As I said though, I'm back to make amends.'

I ask if he'll live in the palace. He shakes his head. 'No. I know I should but I don't like the place anyway and besides, when Liam is trying to be a king and command attention, I don't want people to look past him and at me. The abdicated king. No thanks. I've got my own place. It's got a beautiful view over the harbour.. You'd like it.'

He gives me a wink and I hate to say it but I blush. I actually blush. Leo gives me a grin. 'Tell you what, Carmen..' he says, 'anything you want to ask me, you can, but it has to be off the record and over a drink with me.'

I tell him we're drinking coffee. He chuckles. 'I meant something stronger.'

He looks at me steadily for a moment, waiting for my response. I shake my notes, trying to look professional. Leo grins and raises his hand in the air. 'Can we have the check please?'

******

As this article goes to print, we must inform our readers that we have had to dismiss Carmen Cortez for inappropriate behaviour with her interview subject and failing to uphold our values of journalistic professionalism. She now works at TV Guide.

#leo rhys #the royal romance #trr #TRH

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robinallender · 4 years

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Albums of 2019/the decade

(‘Martin Brennan’ appearing on This Time with Alan Partridge, my favourite TV programme of 2019.)

It’s impossible to make an album of the year list because I haven’t listened to every album that was released this year. And to make an album of the decade list…? Well, that’s even impossibler.

I suppose I could try to do what James Acaster did in his book Perfect Sound Whatever, but instead of listening to every album from 2016 I could attempt to listen to every album from the entire decade. A Sisyphean task – and by the time I’d listened to all of those albums, it would probably be around 2030. And by that point, providing the world is still functioning by then, I’d have another decade of albums to catch up on. I could draw a comparison to Tristram Shandy here but I won’t.

(Plume is my favourite novel of the year.)

(‘DNA.’ is the most thrilling three minutes of music this decade.)

The excellent thing about Acaster’s book is that it glories in the fact that beneath all the hype and buzz of big releases, and away from algorithmic playlists and ubiquitous albums of the year, there is a universe of incredibly diverse and exciting music being made all the time. Acaster rightly celebrates bandcamp, which has become something like the anti-Spotify over the last ten years. Thanks to bandcamp, it feels like there has never been a better time to listen to experimental music. Obscurity no longer exists – there is no longer any music which is difficult to hear.

I’ve become enamoured with Jim O’Rourke’s Steamroom page, where he regularly releases albums of ambient/noise music. if you’re expecting the Bacharach-esque chamber-pop of his Drag City albums then I’m afraid you’ll be disappointed. There’s a fantastic interview with him here where he describes his creative process (I’m a particular fan of Number 44).

It feels like the prevalence and dominance of the internet has brought with it a certain kind of musical freedom. There’s a kind of the-music-industry-has-collapsed-so-does-anything-really-matter-anymore attitude which I love! Dean Blunt’s Black Metal (2014) feels like an album that couldn’t have been made at any other time. An ‘anything goes’ album of hip-hop/indie/experimental/weirdness that breaks so many production rules (samples of badly compressed MP3s, levels clipping all over the place) but sounds all the better for it.

Of course the problem with everything being available at the click of a button is that you get overwhelmed with choice. I think this decade I got something like cultural fatigue. I'm pretty sure Tim Heidecker and Gregg Turkington’s endlessly meta online show On Cinema should be my favourite thing ever, but I can’t be bothered to watch all one hundred hours of it. And you can’t dip into it because the joke is that it only really works if you watch all one hundred hours of it. Being told to stick with things because they’ll get better in the fifth series…? Can I not just watch Masterchef and have a lie down?

(I played the Olympia in Paris with Yann Tiersen in 2014!)

The other problem with making ‘best of’ lists is: do you choose albums because you love them or because of their cultural importance? Clearly the best album of the decade culturally was Kendrick Lamar’s To Pimp a Butterfly – an actual soundtrack to a civil rights movement, an album of astonishing power and viscerality. It’s a dense, difficult album full of brilliant songs. But you’re not always going to be in the mood to listen to it. You’re not always going to be in the mood to be challenged, or to be saddened that an album like that needed to be made!

Or should your album of the decade be the album you listened to the most? This would probably make sense since Spotify has taken over our listening habits and now insists on sending us our most played songs of the year, a cruel reflection of our exposed ids (for a Velvet Underground fan, I really listen to a lot of Bastille). Well, if we went by what Spotify suggested, one of the most successful artists of the decade would be ‘ambient rain noise’.

I believe that the truth is between. Some albums on my list I have listened to almost constantly, others I have only listened to once or twice, but they blew my head clean off when I did (Yeezus for example).

(My most played album of the decade was Benoît Pioulard’s Stanza I-III, released in three parts throughout 2015-6, probably because I listen to it most evenings to help me fall asleep. Beautiful melodic ambient drones, drenched in reverb and tape hiss. Er… just a bit!)

(I got to the finals of So You Think You’re Funny in 2017!)

While putting together this list, I thought I’d go back to the albums of the 00s list I wrote in 2009. Deerhoof aside, I kind of got snow blindness from reading it! Significantly, I didn’t even notice at the time that my list was made up almost entirely of white artists. Well, I do listen to a lot of morose indie, a genre not famed for its diversity. But this decade I feel that I have expanded my listening habits, and this should be reflected in my list. I hope it doesn’t look like when Rolling Stone do their best albums of all time and put What’s Going On in the top ten as a kind of afterthought (not even Marvin Gaye’s best album).

Who gives a hoot what I think, this is just a blogpost, it’s not like I’m writing for a major newspaper (although I do need a job if anyone’s reading this), but I think that, even on this platform, this is a really important albeit difficult thing to consider. If this decade is to be remembered for anything it’s that we all have a responsibility to promote diversity in our every action; the 2010s were a decade when the personal became political. It was the decade when it became prudent and necessary to notice things like the fact that I posted a list of my favourite albums and they were all made by white artists, even if it’s on a blogpost that no one reads.

It’s not just racist language and behaviour that must be challenged, we must also challenge the social subliminality and structuralism of racism. So yes, a best of the decade list with only white artists, that is part of the problem! Yes, maybe those were my favourite albums of the 00s, but to use a term that has become increasingly prominent this decade, we need to think of the optics.

Aren’t you overthinking this? Tying yourself in knots to sound woke? Well, voice in my head, you sound like a bit of a twat, as does anyone who uses the word ‘woke’ pejoratively.

Can’t you just list your favourite albums? Yes. But my point is: no conversation about culture takes place in a vacuum. Take Mark Kozelek, who topped my list last decade. Would I feel comfortable having him in my list this decade because of his appalling treatment of the excellent journalist Laura Snapes? Not that this would be an issue this decade because of the startling decline in Kozelek’s music. Who could have predicted that Kozelek would go from singing about love and grief with such incredible poignancy to mumble-rapping about buying furniture? (I have written at length about Mark Kozelek before.)

Anyway, I think the terrible state of the world has really affected my listening habits. Basically, life is horrible so I got into ambient music. Turning off the news and drifting off into a hypnogogic daze. What a luxury!

(From the opening sequence of Midsommar, my favourite film of the year. The murals were created by conceptual designer Ragnar Persson and art director Nille Svensson.)

This is the decade when I no longer collected music – as I switched from downloading from iTunes and buying CDs to streaming it felt like I went from active to passive. It was a decade where music became part of the background – Spotify playlists were engineered to be as bland and un-skippable as possible. So it’s been refreshing to see artists challenge this monotony: Michael Kiwanuka’s dense, conceptual KIWANUKA from this year, and Beyonce’s thrilling video albums.

(Do you ever listen to something like Otis Redding singing ‘Try a Little Tenderness’ and almost find it hard to believe that that really happened? That it was ever possible for someone so talented and charismatic to ever walk the earth? I got a similar feeling when I watched Homecoming. How lucky we are to have an artist like Beyoncé!)

(I played Green Man Festival in 2012 with Yann and, because Van Morrison wanted to go on first so he could get away early in his helicopter, we played after him on the main stage. So I can sort of say that Van Morrison supported me.)

(How dreadful to lose Mark Hollis and Scott Walker – and Neil Innes – this year. Whenever I have ten minutes to spare, if I’m waiting for a bus or something, I like to listen to ‘After the Flood’. Ten minutes of transcendence!)

(My favourite tweet of the decade.)

(A personal highlight of the decade for me was filling in at a gig at the 9.30 Club in Washington DC by playing ‘Lady in Red’ when Yann broke a violin string.)

Some specific musical highlights of the decade:

‘Sscending’, an extremely blissed out track by Acronym w/Korridor.

How good was ‘Video Games’? I mean really.

The production on this Nicki Minaj song is utterly fantastic.

I love the lyrically virtuosic Villagers song ‘Earthly Pleasure’.

‘Work’.

Anyway, I’m going to end this by quoting from one of my favourite songs of the decade, and like some dreadful character from a 00s pre-mumblecore indie romcom, it’s by The Shins.

Love’s such a delicate thing that we do With nothing to prove Which I never knew

Albums of 2019

Orange – Caroline Shaw/Attacca Quartet The Sacrificial Code – Kali Malone Xièxie – Celer Homecoming: The Live Album – Beyoncé Occam Ocean II – Éliane Radigue Requiem for Recycled Earth – James Ferraro Nonlin – Steve Hauschildt Tracing Back the Radiance – Jefre Cantu-Ledesma Cuz I Love You – Lizzo Chastity Belt – Chastity Belt House of Sugar – Alex G (Sandy) Tip of the Sphere – Cass McCombs Designer – Aldous Harding Psychodrama – Dave Titanic Rising – Weyes Blood Compliments Please – Self Esteem KIWANUKA – Michael Kiwanuka When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go? – Billie Eilish Nothing Great About Britain – slowthai New Miami Sound EP – Twain MAGDELENE – FKA twigs Normal Fucking Rockwell! – Lana Del Rey STONECHILD – Jesca Hoop This Is How You Smile – Helado Negro I Was Real – 75 Dollar Bill PROTO – Holly Herndon uknowhatimsayin¿ – Danny Brown Fear Inoculum – Tool The Reeling – Brìghde Chaimbeul U.F.O.F. – Big Thief

(U.F.O.F. is my album of the year. It sounds like alchemy, music where trauma has been channelled into something beautiful.)

(I supported John Robins at the Apollo in October this year. Cool!)

Albums of the decade (which I might keep amending Life of Pablo style)

Sleep Like It’s Winter, Steamroom 44 & Simple Songs – Jim O’Rourke Love is the Plan, the Plan is Death – James Blackshaw Magma – Gojira (superb metal album) The Dream My Bones Dream – Eiko Ishibashi The Suburbs – Arcade Fire EARS – Kaitlyn Aurelia Smith Spark of Life – Marcin Wasilewski Trio & Joakim Milder Toumani & Sidiki – Toumani Diabaté & Sidiki Diabaté (please listen to ‘Lampedusa’) Closing – Victoria Hume (got me through a very difficult time) For Those Of You Who Have Never (And Also Those Who Have) – Huerco S. The Uncle Sold – Ed Dowie Witness – Katy Perry (really underrated!) Blonde – Frank Ocean Smoke Ring For My Halo – Kurt Vile Transparent Water – Omar Sosa & Seckou Keita The Curious Hand – Seamus Fogarty Reflection – Brian Eno Looping State of Mind – The Field Tomorrow’s Harvest – Boards of Canada Be the Cowboy – Mitski Volumes 1-4 – Kosmische Läufer Stateless – Dirty Beaches Bridge Music – Eerie Gaits Veteran – JPEGMAFIA V2.0 – GoGo Penguin Lemonade – Beyoncé Oh Holy Molar – Felix Get Your Hopes Down – Landslide Purist (I played on this album but I don’t care, it’s really good!) Beach Music – Alex G (Sandy) Phantom Brickworks – Bibio Chaleaur Humaine – Christine and the Queens Only Myocardial Infarction Can Break Your Heart – Matt Elliott Dust Lane – Yann Tiersen Black Metal – Dean Blunt The Harrow & The Harvest – Gillian Welch Yeezus – Kanye West Ruins – Grouper Kill All Children – Prison UK (sad music from the future) Age Of – Oneohtrix Point Never (more sad music from the future) Nothing Important – Richard Dawson Hidden & Field of Reeds – These New Puritans To Pimp a Butterfly & DAMN. – Kendrick Lamar Devil is Fine – Zeal & Ardor Divers – Joanna Newsom Stanza I-III & Hymnal – Benoît Pioulard alterum – Julie Fowlis Unfold – The Necks DAYTONA – Pusha T Golden Hour – Kacey Musgraves Olivia Chaney EP – Olivia Chaney Wit’s End, Big Wheel and Others & Mangy Love – Cass McCombs

(My favourite album of the decade is, unsurprisingly if you know me, Wit’s End by Cass McCombs, released in 2011. A perfect album of eight perfect songs. I still listen to it at least once a week and I don’t think it will ever lose its magic.)

#albums of the year 2019 #albums of the decade

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puzzledorange · 5 years

Text

OC’s Answer 15 Q’s Tag

okey i know this took a while and there are so many more tag games that I need to do, but once I take over the world i will outlaw school so i can have time to do these, so please don’t hesitate to tag me in more stuff!

I was tagged by @thatsadwriter so thanks for that!

Okay so what I’m gonna do is that P (from the Metalrifter) is answering, but both Rigby and Olsen (from stories Friends & the Universe and Life in the Rivers respectively) are also they’re butting in whenever they want. They are in Violet’s apartment house being interviewed btw.

rules: answer fifteen questions as either yourself or your ocs, then tag fifteen people

————————

what is your full name?

“Oh that’s easy. P.”

“Are you serious? You’re the one with some weird-ass nickname and you decided to take this question?” Rigby says.

“Well I don’t have any other names, do I?” P snaps back. “What about your name huh? If mine’s so flawed.”

“I never thought you’d ask.” chuckles Rigby. He tilts his head to the side and combs his hair back. “Rigby Diggins here.” P chortles.

“What’s so funny to you?” Rigby hisses.

“No matter how many times I hear your last name, I laugh.” P responds. “It sounds like a cartoon character’s.”

“Enough.” Rigby says, “Alright Olsen, hit us with your full name.”

“Oh me?” Olsen says. “Well my full name is Olsen Maegan Rivers.”

“At least SOMEBODY has a normal name here.” P says.

“Wait weren’t you technically adopted by Violet though?” Olsen asks. “You guys are technically brother and sister or something right?”

P sighs. “Yeah, I guess.”

“So what is your real full name?”

“P Patterson.”

“I’m calling you Peepa from now on.” Rigby says.

“Please don’t.”

what is your gender? “I’m a guy.” P says.

“Are you sure about that, Peepa?” Rigby teases.

“I’m this close to whooping your ass into next week.”

what does your full name mean?

“Uh, I don’t know. It just is my name.” says P.

“Why did you answer the question if that was the answer you would give” asked Rigby.

“Fine then, its over to you.” says P.

“That’s what I’m talking about! Well my name is Rigby because of my free spirit. What can I say, I’m special!”

“Yeah, I don’t doubt that.” says P. “What about you Olsen?”

“Well I looked it up, and a website said that my name meant ‘descendant’. I guess that makes sense, since my ancestor founded my hometown.”

any nicknames or other names?

“My code name is Captain Orbit, or just Orbit.” says P. “That’s what they call me up in space.”

what is your sexuality?

“Huh, I’ve actually never really thought about what kind of people I like.” P says.

“You gotta be kidding me, you’re the most boring person ever.” Rigby says. “And by the way, I’m bi.”

“What does it mean to be bi?” P asks.

“You’re joking.”

P shakes his head.

“Oh, come on!” Rigby exclaims. “Even Olsen knows what that means! How are you this royally uneducated? I thought you were Violet’s brother, but it really is evident that you two are adopted siblings.”

“Hey!” Olsen snaps his fingers. “Calm down. Jesus, you’re always a lit fuse aren’t you?”

“Lit in more ways than one.” Rigby says with a sly smile. He looks at P thinking that he would get the joke, but his humor is that of a wet towel.

where are you from?

“I’m not really sure.” says P.

“EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR ANSWERS HAVE BEEN EXCEPTIONALLY SHITTY OH MY GOD I CANNOT HANDLE THIS ANY LONGER” says Rigby.

“Shut your goddamn mouth up.” P says, sending metal up to Rigby’s mouth to inhibit his speech. In response, he starts clawing at it.

Olsen raises his hand in anticipation. “Hey, can I go?”

“Sure go ahead.” P responds.

“Okay so,” Olsen starts. “I was born in Riveria, a small town in--”

Rigby rips off the metal restraining his mouth. “God, can’t a man have freedom of speech? I think you just single-handedly cured my iron deficiency. Anyways I know you guys don’t care, but I was born and raised in glamorous LA.”

“Can you just shut it and listen to Olsen?” P says.

“I knew you wouldn’t care. Hurts, man.”

“As Olsen was saying, he lives in Riveria, and…?” P says.

“Oh yeah! And my great great great great grandfather actually founded the town.” Olsen continues.

“Oh really? Do you want a medal?” Rigby says, reclining back in his chair.

when were you born?

“I WILL take this one, okay?” Rigby says.

“Fine.” says P.

“I was born June the 22nd, 1990. The greatest day on Earth.” Rigby says.

P scoffs.

“You guys can’t even say anything, because your author was negligent enough to not give you definitive birthdays yet!”

Olsen sighs. “Yeah, that’s a problem.”

whoops sorry

how old are you?

“I’m about twenty two I’d say,” says P.

“I’m twenty nine. Hah, beatcha.” Rigby says.

“I’m seventeen.” Olsen says.

where do you live?

“Oh, uh, here.” P says, pointing down at the ground.

Rigby mocks him. “Uh, oh, um, uh, here. Where is here dumbass?”

“Queens. New York.” P says in a stiff tone.

“Better. Now watch an interesting person take this question.” Rigby says. “Right now, I’m currently residing in space, specifically in the port of the Planet Happi.”

“P-Probably not so, uh, ‘Happi’ when you’re there!” Olsen calls out.

“Hey-o! High five!” P exclaims. The two share a hand slap. “So where do you live, Olsen?”

“Well I lived Riveria until I left to LA during my middle school years. I came back to my hometown about 2 years ago.”

P suppresses a laugh. “Sorry, I just can’t let that joke go.”

“It wasn’t even that funny.” Rigby says, crossing his arms.

what are your quirks?

“What would constitute as a quirk?” Olsen asks.

“It’s what makes you weird and shit.” Rigby says. “P should go first, since this is literally the only question that can make him sound like a cool person.”

“I’d clock you, but I have to answer this question.” P says. “So, I Metalrift. What that essentially means is that I can control and manipulate metal with my mind. It’s super useful, but it took a grueling process to acquire. I have a few other friends that can rift other things, like Scott Walker. He can rift rock, and he’s damn good at it too.”

“I for one,” Rigby says, “Am competent at what I do without the help of magic, but with the help of a little bit of alchies. I shoot aliens and shit. Ain’t that right Peepa?” He smiles as he puts his hand on P’s shoulder. He shrugs Rigby’s hand off.

“What about you, Olsen?” Rigby asks.

“Well, I’m really good with a blade, a machete specifically. Still, my friend, Lisa, taught me how to properly fight. I have a signature backswing and everything.” Olsen says. “Also P I hope you wouldn't mind metalrifting for us. I mean I've seen it in combat, but not really up close and personal. Could you?”

“Uh, sure, I don’t see why not,” P says, looking around the apartment for any loose metal lying around. “I don’t see any metal though.”

“Wait no, I got you.” Rigby says, pulling out a ray gun and a hammer from the inside of his coat.

“Perfect! I can just extract the metal from the g--”

Rigby starts to casually smash the gun, reducing it to metal bits and bobs. “There you go, rift away.” Rigby says.

P lifts the metal with his mind, and formulates a small elephant on the table using the bits and bobs. It walks around and spurts tiny pieces of metal out of its trunk.

“Oh sweet!” Olsen exclaims.

“Okay yeah, that’s pretty sick, I gotta admit.” says Rigby. “Hey, that rhymes!”

who are your family members? “Uh, next question.” Olsen says. who are your pets?

“I have a turtle, and he is the light of my life.” says Rigby.

“And what’s his name?” Olsen asks.

“Cadet. What a little man.” Rigby says.

“Why’s his name Cadet?” P asks.

“I’m glad you asked.” says Rigby. “I named him after my favorite wine, Mouton Cadet.”

“How original.” P dryly says.

what do you look like?

“Well, I have black hair and green eyes” says P. “Also, I wear a red flannel with a black shirt underneath, and topping it all off with my signature blue pants and black shoes.”

“Alright, my turn!” says Rigby. “So I dyed my hair blond, but my original hair color is brown. I have blue eyes and an amazing goatee. I’m wearing my space uniform right now, which is a blue collar necked coat-jacket that has a white stripe near the bottom, black pants strapped with a holster, black boots, and black gloves. Oh, also I’m a hell of a lot taller than P. Five foot ten ass…”

“How tall are you then?” asks P.

“Six foot three.” Rigby triumphantly says.

“What about you Olsen?”

“Alright,” Olsen says, “Well I have brown hair, a bit combed to the side, brown eyes, and freckles. I wear a red short sleeve with a gray long sleeve undershirt, along with blue jeans and regular sneakers. Oh, and I’m five foot ten too!”

“Shorties.” says Rigby.

who’s your hero?

“Definitely my uncle,” says Olsen. “He’s a real inspiration and always has great advice for me.”

“Both my friends Violet and Basil are amazing people and I wouldn’t be alive for them, so probably those two people.” says P.

“I really like the Hamburglar.” says Rigby. The others stare at him. “What? He really got me to buy more burgers, honest!”

what’s your moral alignment?

“Yo dude!” Rigby says. “I’m uhh,” He snaps his fingers, “Chaotic good.”

P chimes in, “I’m definitely lawful good.”

“And that leaves neutral good for me!” says Olsen. “Wait that’s the last question right?”

“Yeah, and wow I’m so glad we’re done with this.” says P.

“Why?” asks Olsen.

“So I can do this.” P says, getting up from his seat and knocking Rigby’s lights out.

——————————————–

Cool, this was fun! I’ll be tagging @starlightinhumanform, @ill-write-when-im-dead, and @kaigods, but don’t be obligated to do them. You’re an independent person!

#Metalrifter #Friends&Universe #LifeinRivers #ocs #myocs #tag game #i was tagged ages ago but whatever #hope you dont mind something like months later #sorry but school's kickin my ass rn #dyin but still thrivin :')

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eddycurrents · 5 years

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For the week of 21 January 2019

Quick Bits:

Aquaman #44 continues “Unspoken Water” from Kelly Sue DeConnick, Robson Rocha, Daniel Henriques, Sunny Gho, and Clayton Cowles. This story feels a lot like some of the ‘80s DC reimaginings that came on the heels of Crisis on Infinite Earths, playing with the mythology in a new way while approaching the narrative from oblique angles. Definitely an interesting revelation about the people on the island. Rocha, Henriques, and Gho are probably doing some of the best art of their careers.

| Published by DC Comics

Avengers #13 gives us the origin of the 1 million BC Iron Fist from Jason Aaron, Andrea Sorrentino, Justin Ponsor, Erick Arciniega, and Cory Petit. The artwork from Sorrentino, Ponsor, and Arciniega is gorgeous, capturing some of the feel that David Aja brought to K’un-Lun in The Immortal Iron Fist.

| Published by Marvel

Batman #63 continues to attempt to break your brain as “Knightmares” continues with Mikel Janín and Jordie Bellaire joining Tom King and Clayton Cowles for the fun. This one gives another possible explanation for what’s going on as John Constantine warns Bruce and Selina of what’s going to happen in their domestic bliss.

| Published by DC Comics

Blossoms 666 #1 is kind of a slow-burn opener, intent on easing the reader into the surprises of this type of horror, which somewhat works against the back cover blurb and solicitation copy, but eh. Still, some great character work from Cullen Bunn building Cheryl and Jason. And the artwork from Lauren Braga and Matt Herms is perfect.

| Published by Archie Comics / Archie Horror

Cover #5 kind of sets us up for a conclusion next issue. Kind of. It’s more character building, anecdotes from comics conventions, and exploration of the art form through various means that has elevated the series from the beginning from Brian Michael Bendis, David Mack, Michael Avon Oeming, Zu Orzu, and Carlos Mangual. The Ninja Sword comic sequences this issue are particularly great.

| Published by DC Comics / Jinxworld

The Curse of Brimstone Annual #1 offers three stories, one focusing on Brimstone and two fleshing out adversaries Detritus and Wandering Jack. Great art throughout from Mike Perkins, Neil Edwards, John Stanisci, Denys Cowan, Donald Hudson, and Rain Beredo.

| Published by DC Comics

Crypt of Shadows #1 is one of the one-shot revivals of old titles for Marvel’s 80th anniversary from Al Ewing, Garry Brown, Stephen Green, Djibril Morissette-Pham, Chris O’Halloran, and Travis Lanham. It’s pretty great, presenting two short stories embedded in a framing narrative, reminiscent of the old horror anthologies.

| Published by Marvel

Die!Die!Die! #7 is more balls to the wall action and insanity from Robert Kirkman, Scott Gimple, Chris Burnham, Nathan Fairbairn, and Rus Wooton. It’s the battle between Lipshitz and Barnaby that has been building for a while now and, well, it’s violent, bloody, and brutal as you’d expect. Also, cats.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Freedom Fighters #2 is mostly some vague teasers of things to come and one giant, flashy fight sequence, but it’s an entertaining fight sequence. The art from Eddy Barrows, Eber Ferreira, and Adriano Lucas really get to do the heavy lifting in this story and it shines.

| Published by DC Comics

Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #2 proves that the first issue wasn’t a fluke, with Tom Taylor, Juann Cabal, Nolan Woodard, and Travis Lanham providing another highly entertaining, very funny, beautifully illustrated story. Taylor captures Peter’s voice incredibly well.

| Published by Marvel

Go-Bots #3 jumps a bit in the narrative, with a team of astronauts aboard Spay-C discovering Gobotron, where a decidedly authoritarian Leader-1 is taking some draconian measures to keep the Guardians in line, while still fending off Cy-Kill and his minions. Tom Scioli keeps us off-balance a bit for what’s going on and it adds a nice tension to the story. Also, the locking mechanism for the prison cell is a nice touch of nostalgia.

| Published by IDW

Guardians of the Galaxy #1 is a great debut from Donny Cates, Geoff Shaw, Marte Gracia, and Cory Petit, setting up a new post-Infinity Wars Marvel cosmic standard. There’s a good deal of action and humour through this as Thanos’ wake leads to many of the cosmic “heroes” pledging a path to an odd bloodbath--with a large amount of Earth-based heroes as possible targets--and a heist of his body by the Black Order (who’ve also stolen Knowhere) before anything can get underway. This is probably one of the stranger “gathering of the team” stories, but it gets it out of the way in a fascinating manner to hit the ground running next issue. The art from Shaw and Gracia is suitably epic.

| Published by Marvel

Hardcore #2 has some very nice art from Alessandro Vitti and Adriano Lucas, as Drake finds he has his hands full with both Markus trying to fully take over the Hardcore program and the criminal organization he was trying to take down being on to him. Both trying to kill him. Lots of entertaining action in this one.

| Published by Image / Skybound

Hellboy and the BPRD: 1956 #3 brings up some interesting history questions for the Bureau and certain locations we already know about, as Mike Mignola and Chris Roberson’s script continues to dovetail some already existing knowledge of history.

| Published by Dark Horse

High Heaven #5 conclude season one of this series as well, leaving David exactly where he wished to be, but finding out it’s not necessarily what it’s cracked up to be. Tom Peyer, Greg Scott, Andy Troy, and Rob Steen have really been delivering a bitingly funny take on the afterlife here. Also another fun Hashtag: Danger short from Peyer and Chris Giarrusso. I’m glad that this one is going to be graduating to its own feature for Ahoy’s second wave of books. And the issue is rounded out by the usual prose stories and text pieces.

| Published by Ahoy

Immortal Hulk #12 is a tough one. Even as Hulk travels deeper into the heart of Hell and Al Ewing continues to wax philosophical in the narration about the nature of evil and the concept of the devil or an opposite to god in comparative religions, we get a hard look at Bruce’s upbringing and the abuse that he suffered at the hands of his father. It’s a difficult read as his father tries to justify his abusive actions, but it’s one hell of a character study. Great guest art on the flashbacks from Eric Nguyen to complement the main story’s art from regulars Joe Bennett and Ruy José, with colours from Paul Mounts. It’s astonishing the heights that this run is hitting, one of the best Marvel is publishing.

| Published by Marvel

Justice League #16 concludes “Escape from Hawkworld” from Scott Snyder, James Tynion IV, Jim Cheung, Stephen Segovia, Mark Morales, Tomeu Morey, Wil Quintana, and Tom Napolitano. It’s very much a lore dump, with the Martian Keep telling J’onn about the multiverse before and of Perpetua, along with some interesting and complicated other revelations, but it’s rather interesting.

| Published by DC Comics

Livewire #2 sees Amanda captured, beaten, and mutilated by mercenary bigots at the behest of the US government to figure out a new way to control and neuter psiots. It’s always interesting that these people think they’re doing the “right thing” to justify their genocide. Very impressive artwork from Raúl Allén and Patricia Martín as always. Allén and Martín‘s choices for layouts, colours, even panel-styles lead to some very interesting visual storytelling.

| Published by Valiant

Low Road West #5 concludes the series, but leaves enough doors open for more somewhere down the line. This has been a very strange series, starting as a kind of post-America future and then tossing in some alternate reality weird western body horror stuff out there. All throughout with some inventive and unique artwork from Flaviano and Miquel Muerto.

| Published by BOOM! Studios

Man Without Fear #4 presents us with the bedside manner of Kingpin from Jed MacKay, Paolo Villanelli, Andres Mossa, and Clayton Cowles. I really like Villanelli’s art here, which seems to be channelling the spirit of Chris Samnee.

| Published by Marvel

Naomi #1 is an incredibly beautiful comic. Jamal Campbell has really gone out of his way to craft a gorgeous first issue, perfectly balancing the ordinary, everyday people of Port Oswego, Oregon and the disruption caused by the superheroics of Superman bouncing through in a battle with Mongul. Brian Michael Bendis, David F. Walker, Campbell, and Josh Reed have something interesting here, working at the fringes of the DC Universe from the perspective of ordinary people, and ordinary people not living in a Metropolis or Gotham at that.

| Published by DC Comics / Wonder Comics

Oliver #1 is an amazing debut from Gary Whitta, Darick Robertson, Diego Rodriguez, and Simon Bowland. It’s worth it alone just for Robertson and Rodriguez’s extremely beautiful, detailed artwork, bringing to life a bombed out, desolate London in stunning detail, but then the story hooks you. There’s a mystery to Oliver’s identity and lineage that pulls you in and the development of a society of an unwanted class of disposable clone soldiers is very compelling.

| Published by Image

Pearl #6 is a very interesting conclusion to the first arc from Brian Michael Bendis, Michael Gaydos, and Joshua Reed. Great bits of comedy throughout what is otherwise a fairly heavy issue. Stunning artwork from Michael Gaydos.

| Published by DC Comics / Jinxworld

Quincredible #3 continues to build the world around Quin, as well as showing him learning through action, and finding out the complications of living in a fairly tight knit community where everyone knows everyone. The predicament that Rodney Barnes, Selina Espiritu, Kelly Fitzpatrick, and Tom Napolitano leave us in is compelling and really develops well through the narrative.

| Published by Lion Forge / Roar / Catalyst Prime

The Spider King: Frostbite continues Hrolf’s adventures, now trying to cleanse the world of any remaining alien presence, in this one shot. The main story is a fun tale taking on another brand of infected creatures from the mini-series team of Josh Vann, Simon D’Armini, Adrian Bloch, and Chas! Pangburn. There’s also a back-up starring Sigrid taking no bullshit from Vann, Pangburn, and art by Daniel Irizarri.

| Published by IDW

Superior Spider-Man #2 is essentially an issue-long fight between Terrax and Octavius, but it’s rather entertaining, from Christos Gage, Mike Hawthorne, Wade von Grawbadger, Victor Olazaba, Jordie Bellaire, and Clayton Cowles. The artwork is incredible throughout and there are some humorous cameos.

| Published by Marvel

Teen Titans #26 is the first of this series I’ve picked up, largely since in a few months it will be crossing over with Deathstroke, and it’s not bad. It seems intertwined with Red Hood (another title I’m not reading), but all of the necessary information seems to be being provided in the story, giving no problems with narrative flow. Adam Glass adds some very nice humour in the dialogue that keeps things snappy. The art from Bernard Chang and Marcelo Maiolo also nicely captures a youthful vibe.

| Published by DC Comics

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles #90 begins to pick up the pieces from the EPF’s assault on Burnow Island, as well as weaving in the bits and pieces from the recent macro-series, as the Turtles and the Mutanimals hold a wake for Slash. Great art from Michael Dialynas and Ronda Pattison.

| Published by IDW

X-O Manowar #23 begins “Hero” from Matt Kindt, Tomás Giorello, Diego Rodriguez, and Dave Sharpe. It’s largely set-up,--bringing back the bounty hunters who assaulted Aric previously, showing off Kate’s new ship in action against said bounty hunters, and then Aric wondering how he pees in the suit--, but it’s damn entertaining. Also, Giorello and Rodriguez practically put on a clinic for visual storytelling.

| Published by Valiant

Other Highlights: American Carnage #3, The Avant-Guards #1, The Beauty #26, Buffy the Vampire Slayer #1, Cloak & Dagger: Negative Exposure #2, DuckTales #17, Exorsisters #4, GI Joe: A Real American Hero - Silent Option #3, Grumble #3, Jim Henson’s Beneath the Dark Crystal #6, Kaijumax: Season 4 #4, Lightstep #3, Lucifer #4, Mars Attacks #4, Monstress #19, Outcast #38, Regression #15, Rise of the TMNT #4, Road of the Dead: Highway to Hell #3, Shuri #4, StarCraft: Soldiers #1, Star Trek: The Next Generation - Terra Incognita #6, Star Wars #60, Sukeban Turbo #3, War is Hell #1, The Witcher: Of Flesh & Flame #2

Recommended Collections: Battlepug Compugdium, Black Panther - Book 6: The Intergalactic Empire of Wakanda Pt. 1, Cosmic Ghost Rider: Baby Thanos Must Die, Coyotes - Volume 2, Daredevil - Volume 8: The Death of Daredevil, Jughead: The Hunger - Volume 2, Marvel Two-in-One - Volume 2: Next of Kin, Polar - Volume 1: Came from the Cold, The Problem of Susan & Other Stories, Proxima Centauri, X-O Manowar - Volume 6: Agent

d. emerson eddy did not eat the last piece of cherry pie. It was the cats, they’re trying to frame him.

#This Week in Comics

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some-flyleaves · 6 years

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when I pick up a book called What the #@&% is That? I know I’m in for a ride, for better or for worse

conclusion: inconclusive, but you can get quite a variety outta the prompt “a character has to say or think the phrase ‘what the [fuck] is that’”

So this book came in the library a few months ago; checked it out, read one or two stories, drowned in schoolwork, returned it, and have since read it on and off when things are slow and I got nothing better to do. (Yeah, I get paid to sit around and read sometimes. It’s a good gig.) Finally finished it tonight and, well. It’s a thing!

Aside from the titular phrase, none of the stories are connected - different authors, different writing styles, hell even different genres. Have some bullet-point thoughts.

“Mobility” by Laird Barron is... weird. I vaguely remember reading that the guy is a master of cosmic horror, and if this is how the genre usually works then I’m in no rush to read Lovecraft. Surreal imagery turns into pretentious metaphors turns into torture porn turns into surreal pretentious metaphors. Not a fan.

“Fossil Heart” by Amanda Walker is, uh, gay? I think?? I’d need to reread this one to get a better grasp on it but I’m in no rush. From what I remember, it’s about a woman who’s literally haunted by her past (got her girlfriend killed or drowned or something?) and then... changes that. somehow? I guess??? The prose is dreamlike, present tense, and while I’m all for not spoonfeeding the audience, I feel like I don’t remember this one as well because I didn’t really understand what was going on. It was one of the earlier stories I read, to be fair, but I also recall other early stories much more vividly.

“Those Goddamn Cookies” by Scott Sigler is clever as hell, and while the progression is a tad predictable post-twist reveal, I was definitely not expecting a little space scifi out of this book. There are some nice characterization touches throughout, the intersection of thoughts and narrative gets intense when needed, and honestly? Would not have called the ending when the intro has the protagonist smelling fresh-baked cookies.

“The Sound of Her Laughter” by Simon R. Green is apparently forgettable enough I needed to skim it again just now to remember what the hell it was about. There’s a couple. Unreal stuff happens, I guess. Characterization was alright...? Uh. Yeah. No dislike but not impressed.

“Down and Deep in the Dark” by Desirina Boskovich is at least memorable, albeit for mixed reasons. Narrated by a snarky teenager(/young woman? I forget the age) whose brother is getting married, the story finds narrator whatshername in charge of babysitting her near-future nephew. It doesn’t seem particularly horrific until ~things go wrong~, something with animals turning up dead by the hotel the family’s staying at and rooms in the hallway that shouldn’t be there.... The first-person and initially casual tone were a nice change of pace, but once the buildup started, it kinda just seemed like creepy stuff for the sake of Creepy Stuff. And of course the aforementioned nephew gets to be a creepy child, because of course he is. I have a habit of reading spoilers before actually getting into a piece of media, which in the case of short stories means skipping to the end before reading from the start. Sometimes the buildup and resolution is very clever, and at least one story later still caught me off-guard once I knew the context of the twist! But sometimes, as with this story... Stuff Just Happens.

“Only Unclench Your Hand” by Isabel Yap is mildly haunting with an ending that, while not exactly thought-provoking, sports just the kind of... not bittersweet, but it’s got a hesitant, uncertain vibe that I can’t quite put into words but always appreciate. Also narrated in first-person by a youngish gal whose name and exact age I forget, the story finds her studying abroad in a small village where everyone knows everyone, for better or for worse. The family she’s staying with has a couple daughters, one around the narrator’s age and the other younger but thankfully not in the “obligatory annoying sibling” way. And then Shit Goes Wrong(TM), but in a less random way than the previous story, and from what I remember it’s not even that heavy on the supernatural stuff until later! Overall a good read with an interesting twist. Also canon gay, I think. There’s a pleasantly surprising amount of Gal Pals(TM) in this anthology.

“Little Widows” by Maria Dahvana Headley also has gals who are friends (not romantic though), cults, and... dinosaurs, I guess? Its premise is interesting enough - “sisters” raised in a cult encounter their “Preacher” and Comeuppance Ensues - in a way that begs to be taken seriously but... can’t, really, imo. Weird Religious Cult(TM) is already asking or some suspension of disbelief from me, since while of course they exist they’re a lot less common than their prominence media would suggest, but fuckign. dinosaurs? when the story up until then has been grounded enough?? Yeah, nah, ya lost me.

“The Bad Hour” by Christopher Golden is BRILLIANT. That thing I mentioned about skipping to the end first? applies here, and this is the story that still floored me once I finished it. An army veteran visits a closed-in town for reasons that aren’t revealed upfront but make for some great fridge logic, and I can’t say much else without spoiling but it’s very much worth a read. Great atmosphere, interesting characters, holy shit.

“What is Lost, What is Given Away” by John Langan is another story I had to skim just now to remember and even then Iiiiii got nothin. The narrator attends a high school reunion and eldritchy stuff happens to a guy or something. I vaguely remember thinking some moments were clever when I was reading but apparently not too clever. V: Also, it’s long. Next.

“Now and Forever” by D. Thomas Minton is about a father protecting his family from a mysterious Fiend in a vaguely post-apocalyptic setting. Until he isn’t. Can’t say much else without giving it away but while it does its job, I wasn’t a huge fan. Spoiler alert: unreliable narrators aren’t my favorite trope, though I appreciate that we didn’t learn right off the bat the guy wasn’t actually doing his job as well as he thought he was. Or was he. For obvious reasons, the circumstances are left vague; presumably you can pick up a few more worldbuilding details on a reread, but I think I’ll pass.

“#ConnollyHouse #WeShouldntBeHere” by Seanan McGuire is creative as all hell, and even if the scares given are kinda flat, I gotta give it points for format alone. As the title might suggest, the entire story is told in a series of tweets from @boo_peep, including timestamp, hashtags, and retweets from @friends as they, as part of a regular haunted house exploration gig, delve into the titular Connolly House. The format makes for a breezy read, and a certain twist will probably have you rereading just to catch some fun little details. Which is impressive, considering character limit is (presumably? I ain’t counting) obeyed throughout. And when Boo Peep isn’t SCREAMING about the hell she’s seeing, there’s an awful lot left to the imagination. #FunTimes

“The House that Love Built” by Grady Hendrix is also forgettable. There’s a guy. He dates women. People die. Wheee. Actually, it was this or the other one with the couple where I at least liked a couple characterization tidbits. Maybe both? But yeah, not my favorite. Movin’ on.

“We All Make Sacrifices: A Sam Hunter Adventure” by Jonathan Maberry is, on one hand, a cookie cutter story about a cynical vigilante-ex-cop, and honestly I kinda regret looking up the author’s other work after reading because it pointed me towards reviews calling out his writing for being so tropey. Because while reading? Might be that I’m not too familiar with the mystery genre, but it was a heckin fun ride. Great characterization, both on behalf of the titular protagonist and the various side characters, even if the antagonist being described as (paraphrasing) “pretty much your typical entitled rich boy” gets a little grating. The story is cliche but shamelessly so, and eh, I usually don’t care for that but it got me anyway. Also, Hunter is a werewolf. That’s fun and it spoke to my old flame of werecanine appreciation but shhh.

“Ghost Pressure” by Gemma Files is... kinda all over the place? a bit? Horror, now at a senior home. I wasn’t entirely clear on who the narrative was following, and while the means of Supernatural Horror is interesting, it leaves a lot to be desired. Ah well, shout out for being about the older among us, I guess? Come to think of it, it could’ve done something thematically with the whole “no one wants you anymore/the people who take care of you are dead” idea, but it... didn’t. discernibly. to me.

“The Daughter out of Darkness” by Nancy Holder features a misogynist unreliable narrator, presented as a sort of case file. Does its job I guess, but lost me at the “letter from an asylum” setup.

“Framing Mortensen” by Adam-Troy Castro is one of if not the favorite story of mine in here, because holy SHIT, is it vivid in all the wrong ways. The narrator has a hellish grudge against Mortensen, for reasons I don’t quite remember and that aren’t terribly important anyway. The real horror (and call for suspension of disbelief) is in what he does with the guy, both in terms of “murder” because of course he does and subsequent, er, treatment. It’s dawning on me this makes it sound like a necrophilia nightmare but it’s not torture porn I swear. Also, if the opening story failed at eldritch abomination-type horror, this one more than compensates by the end. Another good read, would definitely recommend.

“The Catch” by Terence Taylor also features a rather despicable narrator, and while I’m tired as anyone of ~ooh no serial killer who has no feelings what a [insert outdated psychology buzzwords here]~, I gotta say this surprised me. It’s... weird. Not really pornographic but because of Reasons it may raise some eyebrows. Can’t say more than that without giving away the big twist, but I’ll admit the ending threw me for a loop and not for unforeshadowed reasons. Bonus points for fridge brilliance in the title!

“Hunters in the Wood” by Tim Pratt is gay, now with dudes, and also trying really hard to be a hunger games spinoff while lampooning the very premise of the hunger games and dystopias like it. (Side note: I have not actually read or watched The Hunger Games. Writing style didn’t catch me, not too interested in the movies.) Take the self-aware commentary from the Sam Hunter story, boost it way up in some expository worldbuilding, throw in some vague eldritchy stuff, and you get this. Mind, it doesn’t last, but it was just annoying enough to me while it did that I wasn’t too invested in the rest of the story. Ah well. I just wish it was bigger on the eldritch and smaller on the totally-not-social-commentary.

“Whose Drowned Face Sleeps” by An Owomoyela and Rachel Swirsky is, for lack of a better word, haunting. Like “Fossil Heart,” it’s got an almost dreamlike narrative style while the actual events are... sorta down to earth? more or less? Except not really, but once the weird stuff starts happening, you’re in the appropriate mood. I found the execution much better here though, between most events being much less vague & more grounded characters. And while exactly what happens and why is unclear, it blurs that line between psychological “haunting” and real life disaster in a way that reminds me of Paranoia Agent. Mind, I read this one tonight and the earlier on months ago; to really compare/contrast I’d have to reread both in one sitting. (Also, could have done without the allusions to sex scenes but At Least It’s Lesbians(TM).)

“Castleweep” by Alan Dean Foster is the closing story of this anthology and boy is it a “love, hate, or love to hate” narrative. A rich tourist and his girlfriend are taking a trip through the ~jungles of Africa~ and he’s about as entitled as you might expect. The narrative doesn’t bend over backwards to condemn the guy because it pulls no punches letting his thought process speak for itself, whether he’s talking his guide into a side trip to a forbidden castle or sticking to his pride when the detour soon proves less than worthwhile. By the time the horror kicks in, you may or may not want the fucker dead anyway - the story seems aware of this and lavishes on the grotesque details. Which... I found unnecessary, and the reasons for the castle being haunted as it was were decently foreshadowed but heavy-handed as hell. Decent enough read if you wanna see a snobby dude and his girlfriend (the latter of whom deserves better, tbfh) get brutally mauled...!

Overall, for a cover and title that promise top notch eldritch horror, the actual stories range from generic spooky shit to really clever but not necessarily scary plot twists and story developments to... what the fuck did I just read. Seriously, a good amount of the phrase drops weren’t even at some big moment of Monsterening - there weren’t even monsters (in the nonhuman creature sense, blablabla ~humanity is the real monster~) in like... half of these? So if that’s what you expect, back out. Also, none of these are gonna keep me awake at night, and I wouldn’t say I have a particularly high tolerance to horror (good ol’ fashioned creepypastas and jumpscares can and have given me all-nighters), but YMMV on that.

However!! Despite my middling reviews on most of these, there are a few that really stand out, and I’d say the anthology is worth checking out just for those. Not a read I regret, overall. And everyone didn’t even die at the end!

(Oh, and did I mention it’s pretty gay? I counted like... at least three Gal Pal duos and one #YesHomo couple, and while I’m definitely not about to get into a story just because it has ~representation~ and the m/f couples probably outnumber 'em by a long shot, it was still a nice surprise. Just sayin’.)

#tonight on 'I need a tag for spontaneous media reviews'#.rtf #this is partially for my own reference because I wanna revisit some of these stories #but like hell if I'll remember them by name alone

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thinkpurpledrank · 6 years

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Drank’s 2018 Dodgers Preview!!

Plenty more of this, please.... and by ‘this’, I mean more pictures of Chris Taylor getting his shirt ripped off in both sexual and nonsexual ways

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Guys, I apologize for being off the grid. I had an injury that put me out of typing condition for the latter part of the postseason and well past Christmas. Then, by that point, apathy had certainly settled in, for baseball reasons. After all, it was just another offseason following what last was a Dodger loss.

Except, this offseason was even worse, than usual. Literally nothing seemingly happened, which only prolonged my angst of that last Dodger loss. I mean, just give me SOME reason to not just expect some World Series-losing team, Fraudman!! ONE HUNDRED AND FOUR WINS IS NOT ENOUGH1!!!!!! NOT EVEN CLOSE YOU PERSONALLY OWE ME A WORLD SERIES!!!!!!!!!

Breathe

Yeah, it would have been nice to get Giancarlo Stanton, or Shohei Otani, or Yu Darvish. They better come through in some way with Bryce Harper, though. Or personally deliver Drank that World Series ring in 2018... a ring that they personally owe... me.

But I get it. It made things lame for quite a while, I’d say. And I guess there are plenty of players available for upgrades, and trades will be made. At least Matt Kemp is back!!!!

It’s admittedly getting difficult for me to accept the fact that he’s going to be leaving soon.

Anyhoo, your 2018 Dodgers Preview by Purple Drank! Enjoy it, because apparently my yearly quota for this blog is about 3 times per year.

Starting Pitching

I will admit that I went into November almost.... almost off of the Clayton Kershaw bandwagon. I thought his Game 5 performance was inexcusable, and it made Drank incredibly sad. Well, some short time later, all these incredibly adorable cute pictures started popping up on the Twitter feed, and how could you be mad?!?

Wait, what? How did that picture of Corey Seager get in there? Weird.

Anyway, I decided that I could never be THAT mad at Kershaw... well, not to the extent that you all were mad at Yu Darvish, anyway. But I forgive Kershaw. I just want that dinger problem from last year to go away.

Are you worried about the rest of the rotation? Because, you shouldn’t! Why not, you ask?

Pretty intimidating pair, right? It kind of has that 19th Century feel going on, and Alex Wood is afraid that all the oxen are going to scramble away.

But really, you should be a little bit concerned about the rotation, particularly with its depth. Kenta Maeda will start, and figures to be a really underrated performer, given that his elbow will hold up again. You know about Rich Hill and Alex Wood’s concerns, by now. You know that Hyun-Jin Ryu is a relative weak link, but he should be solid as he continues to get healthy in this extended-break rotation.

But the man I am most excited to see in 2018 is Walker Buehler. The “Tim Lincecum (when he was good and not terrible)” comparisons are probably the one ‘new’ thing that will get me excited for 2018. I know he was not good in September, but I have learned not to judge a player of immense talent after 4 weeks. I am expecting Buehler to take charge. The movie references are going to get very tiresome.

I do expect the Dodgers to make a trade here, or use some of that extra precious salary cap space to sign a very cheap arm. You know the Dodgers are going to go 10-deep in the rotation this year.

The Bullpen

If there is any lesson that I have come to learn with this front office, it is that they really know what they are doing with relief pitchers. The Dodgers mine for gold in the NRI and waiver wire like every team does, but they pick out golf-sized diamonds with relative success.

This year, the first contestant is Tom Koehler, who just sounds like he played for the Marlins and the Blue Jays. Well, apparently, that spin rate plays up with his velo, and that’s more than enough to convince me that this guy is going to wind up with a 7-year, $149 million contract as a long reliever next year.

The second contestant really does not qualify as a contestant, because the Dodgers actually gave up fairly significant value to get him. His name is Scott Alexander, and don’t you worry, because his story is wayyyy more interesting than you would think for somebody named “Scott Alexander.”

I have read so much about Scott Alexander’s sinker and all the comparisons to Zach Britton that I think he is honestly just Zach Britton. Well, Alexander is Zach Britton-lite, which I choose to accept as like Zach Britton, but will actually pitch in a playoff game.

We better hope that one of these two guys wind up being that underrated relief pitching story sensation this year, because otherwise it’s going to be Pedro Baez.

The Offense

Against RHP: Taylor (CF), Seager (SS), Turner (3B), Bellinger (1B), Puig (RF), Grandal (C), Forsythe (2B), Pederson (LF)

Against LHP: Taylor (CF), Turner (3B), Seager (SS), Bellinger (1B), Kiké (LF), Puig (RF), Barnes (C), Forsythe (2B)

Sorry Matt Kemp, fans. I just do not see an avenue for Matt Kemp to be a regular play... not over Kiké at least (check the numbers against LHP).

But he will make the roster, and he will start a few games in LF. No team is making a play for Matt Kemp when 48 other free agent outfielders exist, but remember that this is the same team a year ago who let Franklin Gutierrez play LF against LHP every day. But just the shots of Matt Kemp in Camelback Ranch again... it’s pretty glorious.

The offense is pretty much as is last year. You might expect Taylor to regress, but I could argue for Forsythe to bounce back the other way. You could argue that Bellinger will regress, but Seager should certainly play better offensively than he did last year. Whatever the case, the offense figures to still be very, very good.

Ugh, you see why this is so boring? I mean, it’s exciting in that it’s going to be good. But it’s the same! But it will be good! I say this as a spoiled fan. Everybody loves each other, nobody is chewing off other people’s ears, there’s no story about Zack Greinke throwing luggage into the street, there’s no drama.

Thanks a lot, front office!

Prediction

You all know that as a Purple Drank, I do not think like humans typically do. I go by a savvy blend of emotion and analytical facts, and my ego is so damn big that I will never ever be proven wrong on the internet. With that said, the Dodgers are virtually the same team as last year, with maybe some regression here or there. The division will be as competitive as it was last year, but here’s hoping that the regular season winds up being just as fun as last year. Seriously, last year was utterly nuts.

1. Los Angeles Dodgers (96-66)

2. Arizona Diamondbacks (90-72)

3. San Francisco Giants (85-77)

4. Colorado Rockies (82-80)

5. San Diego Padres (68-94)

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alhasanalobaydan · 4 years

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Justin Bieber’s Changes album review

Justin Bieber is one of the biggest names in the music industry. He was wildly popular since he was around 10-ish years old. And then after he dropped his album Purpose in 2015, he went through some depression issues, and I believe that everybody knew about them at that time, especially for a big artist like him. And with this long break, that lasted for 5 years, he finally dropped his album Changes in 2020, which includes of 17 songs, including a remix. Let me give you a quick review for each song in the album:

1-All Around me:

For an introduction song to the album, I felt it is pretty, especially his vocals. He sounded really clear in his voice while signing it. Also, I feel like, in a way, this song served the purpose that Justin has changed in terms of signing. It a chill song, and it delivers the echo-ish, floaty vibes in it. Like it is a perfect fit for a night ride, makes you feel you are flying in your dreams. In terms of lyrics, this is probably one of his best songs in this album. Rating: 6/10.

2-Habitual:

First of all, I really liked the background beat, it kind of serves the same purpose as All around me, but the problem is that it is so repetitive throughout the whole song, kind pf boring, honestly. Lyrics? Hmmm, nothing special about them honestly. Rating: 5/10.

3- Come around me:

I like the beat for this one too, it is just that it is almost identical to the one in Habitual. Same instrument, same ups and downs, everything really. The only difference between those two songs is that the lyrics in this one are way worse. He says:

“Who taught you how to drive stick? You a fool with it, love the way you fool with it And the way you motion, motion in my lap Love the way you move with it “

Very sexual, to the point that, its kind of weird in the way he is singing it. It kind of indicates that he loves only for the body, not for the person he loves, not to have some to share feelings with. Rating: 4/10

4-intentions-ft. Quavo:

It is probably the second known song, after Yummy. The beat is amazing. Not repetitive like the others. Quavo was just OK in it, didn’t do the expected job when you hear “Quavo is featuring a song” or something, just OK. Lyrically, also nothing special about them. However, the flow of the song is good, Justin, and his amazing vocals, did a good job keeping up with the beat. Rating: 7/10

5-Yummy:

Yes, it is the one. The most known song, that Justin Bieber tried his best to force it on the audience. Honestly, its is not too bad. I liked the beat of it. It is also catchy. However, when you listen to multiple times, it gets boring. I wouldn’t add it to my favorites but it is fine if someone played it in the car or something. The lyrics are so sexual, just like Come around me. But at least, his vocals helped making the song a bit better, not his best performance though.

6-Available:

The instrumental for this song is beautiful. It has some happiness/joy vibes in it, but also kind of floaty sound too, which is repetitive at this point. Justin hits really good high notes in this song. This song’s lyrics are the weirdest in the album.

“ I get frustrated when you're busy Lately, that's been more than often, baby, what is this? It's like, do you even miss me? Feelin' less than priority, you got me convinced Convinced I'm the only one, trippin' in my head Because in reality, you live in my bed I'm supposed to hold onto everything you said Yes or no question, don't leave it unread”

I mean, what is this? Some psyco lyrics? Ugh! Anyways there are more wired lyrics than these, this only the tip of the iceberg. Rating: 5/10

7-Forever- ft. Post Malone and Clever:

The beat starts good, but it gets boring and repetitive. Needless to say, that Justin’s vocals are the best thing about it. The featuring in this song is sooo unnecessary. Post Malone was not on his best while recording this song, he was using too much auto-tune. Also, clever, the artist that I do not know before this song came out, also just made the song way worse. Rating:6/10 would have been higher if it wasn’t for the features.

8- Running over- ft. lil dicky:

The beat is a bit repetitive, similar to Yummy’s and Forever’s, not mush similar though. But honestly, I liked it more than the those two. It is more of a fast-based beat plus it changes a bit here and there throughout the song. Lil dicky didn’t do too much in it honestly, just like Quavo in Intention, nothing special about it. All I can about the lyrics is that at least it is not materialistic and directly calling out sexual things and actions. But, when in lil dicky’s verse, the lyrics are just worse, they are lost, but his performance was not bad at all. Rating 8/10

9-Take it out on me:

The only two things I liked about this song are: the vocals and the bass/kicks in it. I mean, it is not new to say that Justin saved the song with his vocals. And that is it, nothing wow. Rating:5/10

10-Second emotion-ft. Travis Scott:

Boring beat, repetitive and a bit too loud for the ears/not clear. I didn’t like Justin’s performance that much; he is kind of yelling throughout the song “EMOTTIIIOONNNNN” for nothing, and also, he trying so hard to catch that rapping flow, but fails to do so, horribly. Travis Scott was the same situation as Post Malone and Clever in Forever, his performance is bad. He is the king of Ad-lips, but he still missed it up, it feels like he was singing just because he was paid or something. I love Travis and his songs; it is just not this one. Rating 5/10.

11-Get me – ft. Khelani:

This is the BEST song in this album. Honestly, it might be the best song the Justin has ever released, no joke. The beat is so chill and simple, and yet not repetitive and boring like most of the songs in the album. I literally enjoyed everything about it. The beat, the performances of both artists the lyrics and everything. I am not a huge fan of Khelani, but this song made me rethink. They have a very unique and awesome vocals. They were singing with harmony and they were doing it very well. When I listen to this song, especially in the morning, I get chills because it makes me feel emotional. Rating: 10/10

12-E.T.A:

In this one I didn’t like the instrumental in this. Even the guitar is a bit loud in it. However, Justin’s performance is the only good factor about it. Rating 5/10.

13-Changes:

The title track. Not very strong as title track. Usually the artist puts his best work on the title track, not I didn’t see it in this one. I was boring to be honest, and nothing special about it or even about Justin’s performance. Moreover, the chorus does not make any sense. He says:

“Though I'm goin' through changes Don't mean that I'll change”

Which I do not know what that means. Very weird if you ask me! Rating 5/10.

14-Confirmation:

The beat is so cold that it makes you feel bored. However, there is this synth that comes in the middle of the song, it’s really good. His performance was OK, not the best he has to offer. What I like the most about this song is the lyrics, they are amazing, probably the best in this album.

“All you ever really want All you ever really need is at home”. That is just pretty, and it feels like he really means it. Rating: 5/10

15-That’s what love is:

The cord in this song starts good, like this rising level of sound. Just in general, I liked the guitar in this song. But everything else is just ordinary. Rating: 5/5

16-At least for now:

The second best song in the album. The instrumental music in it, it is mad pretty and it has the western vibe to it. And towards the end, Justin almost yodels, like not a full yodel, and it made love the song even better. The lyrics are good, his performance was like “wow” to me. It’s like he is taking a new direction in this track, what makes special, other than the western vibe, is that it has a mix of acoustic and electric sound, which we didn’t see in the rest of the album. Rating: 9/10

17-Yummy (remix)-ft. Summer walker:

Hmmmm, nothing has changed in this one. It is a bit boring; the beat is still the same. Everything I said about the original still applies here, but would rather listen to the original one if I had to pick. Rating: 4/10.

I am a bit disappointed, to be honest, after all these years, I expected a better album. In general, what made this album boring is the repetition. There are a lot of songs that sound very similar to each other. Also, the lyrics were weird in few songs too, and most of them are not lyrics that you could remember in a song, they were just OK. Thank you

resources:

Come around me lyrics: https://genius.com/Justin-bieber-come-around-me-lyrics

Available lyrics: https://genius.com/Justin-bieber-available-lyrics

Changes: https://genius.com/Justin-bieber-changes-lyrics

Confirmation lyrics: https://genius.com/Justin-bieber-confirmation-lyrics

The whole album in spotify

spotify:album:63iWSELt9V1kV6RSMxN7Ii

https://open.spotify.com/album/63iWSELt9V1kV6RSMxN7Ii?si=TO_LbRcXSNOgR4jhdbXMiA

#changes #justin #bieber #album #review #justin bieber #yummy #quavo #travis scott #lil dicky #post malone #clever

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deadcactuswalking · 4 years

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020: 03/01

Last week, there were 10 songs on the UK Top 40 chart that were not holiday or Christmas singles, and this week, there are two, and by two, I mean these are really technicalities, since depending on however you define a Christmas song, there could also be no Christmas songs whatsoever on this chart. The week after the Christmas songs on all charts, especially the UK Singles Chart and Billboard Hot 100 (Where “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey dropped out entirely from #1), are chaotic, so much so that I think once again I’ll have to eschew tradition and change the format up a bit, because I’m not starting with the top 10; rather I’m starting with the drop-outs, which as you can expect will be mostly Christmas songs. So, with no further ado...

Holiday Dropouts

Okay, so first of all, “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey is out from #2, “Last Christmas” by WHAM! is out from #3, “Fairytale of New York” by the Pogues featuring Kirsty MacColl is out from #4, “Merry Christmas Everyone” by Shakin’ Stevens is out from #6, “Do They Know it’s Christmas?” by Band Aid is out from #7, “Step into Christmas” by Elton John is out from #8, “Happy Christmas (War is Over)” by John Legend is out from #9, “I Wish it Could be Christmas Everyday” by Wizzard is out from #10, “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” by Michael Bublé is out from #11, “Santa Tell Me” by Ariana Grande is out from #13, “One More Sleep” by Leona Lewis is out from #15, “Santa’s Coming for Us” by Sia is out from #17, “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” by Brenda Lee is out from #18, “Merry Xmas Everybody” by Slade is out from #19, “Underneath the Tree” by Kelly Clarkson is out from #21, “Cozy Little Christmas” by Katy Perry is out from #22, “Driving Home for Christmas” by Chris Rea is out from #24, “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by Andy Williams is out from #25, “Mistletoe” by Justin Bieber is out from #27, “Happy Xmas (War is Over)” by John Lennon and Yoko Ono with the Plastic Ono Band featuring the Harlem Boys Choir or something to that effect is out from #28, “Christmas Lights” by Coldplay is out from #29, “Jingle Bell Rock” by Bobby Helms is out from #30, “White Christmas” by Bing Crosby is out from #31, “Holly Jolly Christmas” by Michael Bublé is out from #32, “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)” by Darlene Home is out from #33, “Sleigh Ride” by the Ronettes is out from #34, “Stay Another Day” by East 17 is out from #35, “Wonderful Christmastime” by Paul McCartney is out from #37 and “Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!” by Dean Martin is out from #39. Obviously, all of the Christmas songs from outside of the top 40 are gone too, with one exception. That won’t be the last Christmas song I mention this episode but I’m glad to finally be done with these. Here’s the top 10.

Top 10

Obviously, the highest-charting song from last week excluding any Christmas songs, and the only non-holiday song in the top 10 last week, is up four spaces to #1, and hence technically the first #1 hit of 2020. It’s “Own It” by Stormzy featuring Ed Sheeran and Burna Boy, becoming Stormzy’s third #1, Sheeran’s ninth and obviously Burna Boy’s first. Congratulations, guys, it was inevitable.

Now eight of the ten songs that survived last week are all in the top 10, with the other two scattered around the top 20. Returning to the runner-up spot is Lewis Capaldi’s “Before You Go” up 10 spaces to number-two.

Dua Lipa’s “Don’t Start Now”, unfortunately not seeing much chance at hitting #1 at this stage, is up 11 spaces to number-three. I know these massive climbs look important but they are really not actually worth much note at all since it’s just a result of managing through the Christmas blockade.

Up 12 spots to number-four is “ROXANNE” by Arizona Zervas.

Rebounding to number-five is the former #1 “Dance Monkey” by Tones and I up 15 spaces to number-five.

Billie Eilish’s “everything i wanted” is also in the top 10 at number-six, as it is up 16 positions this week.

Entering the top 10 for the first time is Harry Styles’ “Adore You”, up 19 spaces to number-seven and becoming Styles’ third entry in the top 10.

Our remaining leftover from last week, excluding the Stormzy songs outside of the top 10, “Pump it Up” by Endor reaches the top 10 for the first time up a whopping 28 spaces to number-eight, which may just be one of our biggest one-week climbs ever. It’s Endor’s first top 10, but I predict he won’t get many more in all honesty. We’ll see though.

Since everything else is a new arrival, returning entry or random Stormzy song that climbed, we have a lot of new peaks this week, including “This is Real” by Jax Jones featuring Ella Henderson, which returns at number-nine, becoming Jones’ sixth top 10 and Henderson’s fourth.

Finally, rounding off the top 10, we have “Lose You to Love Me”, returning to the top 10 at #10 as a re-entry to the top 40.

Climbers

Well, we only have two climbers for songs that were here last week, outside of the top 10, and they’re both Stormzy: “Vossi Bop” is seemingly making a second run, up 28 spaces to #12, and “Audacity” featuring Headie One is up 22 spaces to #16.

Fallers

Ellie Goulding’s cover of Joni Mitchell’s “River” fell immensely from its false #1 spot last week, because it is down 27 spots to #28, which is an unfortunate loss but should make it obvious that label politics are the only thing that got this to #1.

Returning Entries

Before the new arrivals, we will have to book-end our Christmas season with our returning entries, the songs that weathered the Christmas storm but are back in full force afterwards, claiming some form of victory, I suppose. Okay, so “Blinding Lights” by The Weeknd is back at #11, “Falling” by Trevor Daniel is at #14, “Someone You Loved” by Lewis Capaldi is at #15, “Watermelon Sugar” and “Lights Up” by Harry Styles are back at #17 and #18 respectively, “Into the Unknown” by Idina Menzel and AURORA, from the Frozen II soundtrack and hence a song I’m counting as our second Christmas single still on the chart, has returned to #19, alongside seemingly its polar opposite, “Don’t Rush” by Young T & Bugsey with Headie One back at #20. “Memories” by Maroon 5 is back at #21, “Gangsta” by Darkoo and One Acen at #22, “Ride It” by Regard featuring Jay Sean making its way back to #23, “Bruises” by Lewis Capaldi unfortunately returning at #24, “Heartless” by the Weeknd is back at #25, “bad guy” by Billie Eilish shows up completely out of the blue at #26 and “Lucid Dreams” by the late Juice WRLD has returned once again at #27. “Better Half of Me” by Tom Walker is back at #30, “Lose Control” by MEDUZA, Goodboys and Becky Hill is back at #31, “South of the Border” by Ed Sheeran featuring Camila Cabello and Cardi B is back at #32, “Netflix & Chill” by Fredo is at #34, “hot girl summer” by blackbear is at #35, “Circles” by Post Malone is at #36, “Must Be” by J Hus is at #37 and finally, “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X featuring Billy Ray Cyrus of all songs is back at #38. Now for our new arrivals, which much like right before we had to fend off the Christmas songs, it’s just a couple of viral trap-rap hits.

NEW ARRIVALS

#40 – “The Box” – Roddy Ricch

Produced by 30 Roc – Peaked at #3 in the US

Roddy Ricch is a Californian rapper who is one of the newest crop of rising Auto-Tune-fuelled sing-rappers like Lil Tjay, Polo G, et cetera, although Roddy takes more influence from Young Thug, and you can definitely tell, in fact as a pretty big fan of Young Thug at least since recently, Roddy comes off as a bit of a rip-off or discount version at times, since I sense a lack of variation and honestly a lack of any true “weird” lines or oddities that make Thugger stand out as much. Roddy, or as BBC has mistakenly called him in his first UK Top 40 hit, “Roddy Rich”, has inflections that just seem awfully standard. That’s why I was excited when I heard “The Box”, from his debut studio album, because it starts with a muffled brass loop under strings and Roddy meekly repeating in his falsetto, “eee-err”, and it continues throughout most of the song, even when the beat actually kicks in. The beat is actually pretty weird too, with a reversed 808 bass that just comes in sporadically instead of a normal 808 bass. It’s really odd and really strange but it works because Roddy embraces it, with a fluid flow that switches inflection and delivery constantly, keeping with no motif or theme for more than four bars. He also attempts the very Young Thug method of making a punchline by saying a normal, somewhat funny line and then pausing for a beat or two, just to come back by saying, “Mm” or “Yeah”. The beat ends in a very cool way too, with the brass and strings loop playing without any percussion, until it reverses and the song ends with the rubbery reversed 808. It sounds really atmospheric and a lot better than how it sounds from my description. Roddy also says a lot of nonsense here that’s actually pretty funny, like how he’s supposedly a 2020 presidential candidate? Also, Roddy, Aaliyah’s dead, I mean, she looked great whilst alive, but if you have a “b**** that’s looking like Aaliyah”, chances are she’s not a model, or at least not anymore. A bit of a morbid point to end on, but this song is pretty fun. I still prefer “Ballin’” though.

#39 – “No Idea” – Don Toliver

Produced by WondaGurl and Cubeatz – Peaked at #25 in Canada and #43 in the US

Don Toliver is a rapper and singer from Texas who is signed to Travis Scott’s Cactus Jack imprint and featured on their debut compilation album, JACKBOYS, which made several appearances outside of the UK Top 40 this week, but none within our little range, but we do have this viral TikTok-propelled hit, “No Idea”, which is often considered his breakout single, and his first UK Top 40 hit. I find Don Toliver mostly tolerable, although I didn’t particularly like him on “GANG GANG” or “CAN’T SAY”. I would describe this song as pretty forgettable, actually, despite the admittedly interesting and pretty flute loop, which is immediately and abruptly drowned out by the vocals, drenched in way too many levels of ugly reverb and Auto-Tune. Yeah, Toliver sounds pretty awful here, and he’s just clearly ripping off his mentor Travis Scott with some of his inflections and even the YAH! ad-lib. The bass mastering is questionable and the song seems to have an aimless structure, with Toliver just breezing through lyric after lyric with no substance or content to speak of, and even a bridge for him to just ad-lib over the beat for about half a minute. The falsetto part is borderline unlistenable, especially when all of the overdubs and multi-tracks start clipping, even though that might be intentional. Yeah, no, this is garbage, as expected.

#33 – “No Denying” – J Hus

Produced by TobiShyBoy

J Hus has released a second single from his upcoming album after “Must Be”, which if you remember I absolutely loved, and we all know him by now and I told his story and legal issues last time, so no needless pre-amble this time. It’s J Hus’ ninth UK Top 40 hit and, to no surprise, it’s pretty good. It starts with this intense string loop, with some brass and a rowdy tone, building up for the beat drop, where J Hus abandons his mellow mumbling for raspy and aggressive spitting over a drill beat, and it’s pretty intense, as well as just sounding great, with some sweet 808 rolls, although the transitions between chorus and verse feel increasingly abrupt, even if the drill beat is added to the chorus after the first time. J Hus’ content isn’t any interesting this time around, either, and I think that’s why it hasn’t debuted that high. The second verse is just kind of boring, and the slightly off-beat chorus soon loses its lustre. I wish I liked this more, and there are things I like about it, especially the instrumental, but I’m not sure Hus did it any justice this time around. I still enjoy his casual bars that pay no mind to careless gang violence because I just think they’re pretty funny, especially when he treats killing someone in response to racial abuse like a normal weekday in the second verse, but this song does pretty much nothing for me past the first verse.

#29 – “No Cellular Site” – D-Block Europe

Produced by Kyle Junior

Now, here we go. Here is some interesting stuff: D-Block Europe. Young Adz and Dirtbike LB, two of the funniest rappers from the United Kingdom, of course, by complete freak accident and pure incompetence. They released a mixtape (their third of 2019) in late December and it seems to have just been swept under the rug for the most part as it seems like a rushed, boring tracklist. It’s got one feature and it’s not a big one at all, so this is the single, seemingly, probably because it’s got a video and for no other reason. This is the one people decided to watch the video for, and conveniently early in the tracklist. It’s their seventh UK Top 40 hit and curiously, I actually quite liked their last song with DigDat, “New Dior”, and maybe these guys have genuinely improved. Yeah, no, not really. They’ve abandoned the guitar, instead going for a gross MIDI flute that barely passes as a melody and allows for a bunch of silence in the beat. It’s just really empty and refuses to develop or build up to anything, even when the beat comes in. The beat is garbage but the men themselves haven’t changed. Young Adz is still the lead here, with his signature mumbling in the intro and handling the hook as well. I think his new ad-lib is a breathy “gyehr”. His flow switches in the first verse but it doesn’t sound natural or organic, and he trails off at the end of the bar, with a weird, vocodered ad-lib that just repeats the last line failing to fill up empty space. The chorus sounds really freaking awkward as well, especially as the verse ends not with an ad-lib but with reverb-heavy humming, before the chorus comes in and the beat can’t decide if it wants to come in or not, so it’s just hi-hats, a gross 808 and murmuring ad-libs for a while. Dirtbike LB’s verse is mixed in a completely different way, but the beat drowns it and a beeping flatline starts playing under his attempt at a soulful melody in the second half of the verse and it sounds pretty heartfelt, detailing his mother’s plight when he went to hospital for a drug overdose. Too bad it has no relation to anything else here, and Young Adz has a second verse for some reason as well. I have no idea why the last chorus sounds like it was recorded through the telephone, or why the song ends with the flute MIDI literally cutting off before the note ends. The lyrics here are terrible as always, but have those same odd, janky quirks they always do. Young Adz has codeine swimming inside him, doesn’t know if the “famous hoe” in his car is from Geordie Shore or Love Island, and saw a gun and sold cocaine before his virginity was taken, because that’s info we need to know. Of course, I appreciate the body positivity in the chorus, I suppose. This song is oddly focused on mothers as well, as he told the person he’s selling drugs to, to not tell his parents, and also draws the line when you start pouring champagne on your Rolex. Sure. Also this line is really funny to me for some reason:

I cannot deny that a [gnarly dude] need drugs

#13 – “My Oh My” – Camila Cabello featuring DaBaby

Produced by Frank Dukes and Louis Bell

Our last song is the single from Cabello’s second album, Romance, in which she experienced a severe sophomore slump critically and commercially, mostly because there is not a single track on the album that is enjoyable. It is possibly one of the worst albums of last year, just out of sheer disregard for both quality and trying to be unique. It is a generic heap of nothingness, and for whatever reason, it has DaBaby on it (He’s the only feature apart from Shawn Mendes). It’s Cabello’s twelfth UK Top 40 hit, and surprisingly enough, the first entry for North Carolina trap-rapper DaBaby, who I have talked about here before. He’s funny, charismatic and raunchy but can get very samey and sometimes his feature verses are just awkward, including this one. The song starts with some eerie, quirky vintage synths that sound pretty cool, but the horn section just punches in and I hear in the distance, a manic Camila Cabello obnoxiously laughing, and I’m immediately pulled out of whatever this is. It’s almost quite overwhelming actually, because a lot happens at the same time. Cabello’s voice is squeaky as either, the backing vocals are Auto-Tuned badly and add so much unnecessary vibrato that it sounds mildly off-key at times. The percussion is awfully mixed, with the trap beat, especially the 808s and kick drums being at the front of the mix, which makes no sense. It’s stiff, awkward and not sexy at all, mostly because Cabello sounds like she’s in pain 90% of the time, and I’m not for kinkshaming but off-key gang vocals aren’t hot. DaBaby’s “Let’s go” sounds so sad and tired, so you can tell from the post-chorus that he doesn’t want to be here, and yeah, his verse proves this. Apparently he’s “going Bieber”. Sure. This sucks.

Conclusion

I’ve got to say, not a great week, but the transition weeks between years are often a bit like this. Best of the Week is going to “The Box” by Roddy Ricch, with an honourable mention towards “No Denying” by J Hus. Worst of the Week goes to “No Idea” by Don Toliver and D-Block Europe don’t escape free, as they get the dishonourable mention for “No Cellular Site”. Follow me on Twitter @cactusinthebank, I’ll see you next week.

REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020

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mass-effect-a-companions-react · 7 years

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Sleeping headcanons! Sleeping headcanons!Sleeping headcanons!

M!Ryder: Sleeps on thier back, with little to no movement. Ocassinally snores, and is a moderately light sleeper. He isnt gonna jump up at every sound but it does take him a minute to wake up. Sleeps with one arm around his LI. Wears standard initiative pajamas

F!Ryder: She sleeps on her side. Doesn't snore,but definitely drools. Likes so sleep facing her LI, and like her brother she wakes up easier than most, but doesn't wake at the slightest movements. Also wears standard initiative pajamas, minus the pants

Cora: Cora sleeps on her side, wrapping around her pillows (or Scott) like a Koala. Shes a light sleeper, and wakes easily. But that doesnt mean you should. She's a grouch in the morning, and wants to shoot who or what ever woke her up. Wears pajamas from home. Its a complete red silk set, that came with a matching bathrobe and rose body lotion.

Jaal: Jaal flips between his back and his side. Its been proven that Jaal can sleep through just about anything and does it just about anywhere. He does weird purring snores, and sleeps with Ryder tucked against his chest. Normally sleeps in the nude, but started wearing light under clothes with Ryder.

PB: Heavy wild sleeper. She starts on her side,but eventually moves all around. Ryder shouldn't be surprised of they wake up with a foot in their mouth, an elbow in their knee and drool on their calves. She snores softly, and it probably takes several explosions to wake her. Sam just settles for turning off the gravity in her pod before turing it on and dropping her. Ryder just pulls her up on feet, making her stand and wake. It takes them a few times though, because she just colapses back on the bed and sleeps again. Sleeps in a sports bra and Ryder's pants

Liam: sleeps face down like a log. Doesn't move, but occasionally talks. Half the time Ryder's not sure he's breathing until he mumbles. Stays up pretty late and is surprisingly non-touchy feely, keeping his arms at his sides. Sleeps in sweat pants, wakes up to a music alarm.Lexi: Lets be real, she probably doesnt sleep that often, spending her time monitoring the comotoes twin. But when she does, she sleeps on her stomach with her face turned to the side, one arm under the pillow and one knee bent. Light sleeper, and sleeps in her uniform. Some one bring her a coffee.

Drack: I imagine that Krogan dont sleep on their backs, with their food humps and everything,so he probably sleeps on his good side. Keeps a shot gun undernearh his pillow, and is a heavy sleeper, untill some one touches him. Thats what the shotguns for. He sleep fights, and anyone who tries to wake him from his fits will find out just how hard a Krogan can kick. Sleeps in what ever he we wants,and DEFIANTLY snores. Extra loud. The team needs to invest in ear plugs. Or a breathing machine for him. Probably both.

Kallo: Sleeps in standard initiative pajamas. Does the starfish position and mumbles in his sleeps. Wakes up earlier and goes to bed later then most. Is often the one to bring Lexi her coffe befoer going to bed. Although, he often falls alseep in his pilot chair.

Suvi: Flips between her sides, and has rolled on Ryder on several occasions,sometimes becoming a cover burrito. Often stays up working on projects, but wakes up easily when her alarm rings. Sleep talks, and occasionally sleep walks. Sara doesnt realize this untill she hears Suvi repeatedly bumping into things, and she just guides her girlfriend back to bed (Your never supposed to wake a sleep walker.) She sleeps in things she brought from home: A tee shirt that says "I make science puns periodically" with a picture of the periodic table on it and gym shorts. She also has bunny slippers, and a large fuzzy bathrobe that Sara refers to as "The skinned muppet."

Vetra: Sleeps on her side in light clothing. Easily woken, and often shoots up in the middle of the night before relaxing and going back to sleep. Sleeps with a hand pistol and her visor. Likes to spoon

Gil: Sleeps in his underwear in a starfish position on his back or stomache. Hogs all the covers, and likes to sleep ontop of Scott. Wakes up relatively early, and uses his internal clock. Always wakes up at 7:00 am sharp, even if he went to sleep 30 minutes earlier. Likes late night gossip with Jil

Reyes: Extremely Light sleeper. Mostly takes power naps though. Sleeps in what ever he's wearing,and keeps a gun on him at all times(This is Kadara port after all.) Light snoring,murmurs in his sleep. Often sleeps at an angle with is arms cross, will lean on Ryder if they are in a relationship, but denies it when confronted. Sleeps in random, hard to find places, and his accent gets thicker when tired.

#Mod Di

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innuendostudios · 7 years

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Video Games Are Better When We Don’t Get Prescriptivist About Storytelling

Oftentimes, when I read an essay by Ian Bogost, I start wondering which of the following is Ian Bogost’s deal:

A. Ian Bogost argues a position because he believes it. B. Ian Bogost argues a position because he thinks it’s interesting and he thinks he can argue it, without much interest in whether or not he believes it. C. Ian Bogost is the kind of Philosophy major who sees no difference between A and B.

I wondered this when his ostensible review of Flappy Bird argued that games are inherently ugly, and I wondered it recently in his new piece, ostensibly a review of What Remains of Edith Finch, which argues games are inherently bad at storytelling.

As a person who grew up on adventure games and last year spent forty hecking minutes talking about what games get right about storytelling that no other media do, you can imagine: I am so, so, so bored of this take.

I mean, hey, I appreciate that the next time some YouTube commenter says that my defenses of interactive narrative are arguing against a straw man, I have an article literally titled Video Games Are Better Without Stories to link them to. (Just kidding, I don’t read the comments.) But, honestly, someone writes this take every six months or so. This time it’s Ian Bogost, next time it will be Raph Koster or Frank Lantz. In game critics circles, we never really got past Ludology vs. Narratology, the debate where Ludologists insist that systems interaction and raw game design are what make games games, and Game Narratologists are fictional gremlins who live under the beds of Ludologists. Bogost's arguments aren’t particularly new.

Much of the substance of the article have already been pored over: Patrick Klepek pointed out that, whether or not you think games should tell stories, people are going to tell stories with games, so this argument is pointless. (Patrick’s piece also links to Danielle Riendeau’s Twitter dissection of Bogost’s piece, which goes through several of its major points.) Austin Walker followed up by pointing out that even a bad story can make a game better than it would be with no story at all. If you care about the history of these arguments, Errant Signal summed up why Ludologists keep tilting at windmills over two years ago, and Emily Short wrote some thoughts in 2011 when it was Jon Blow’s turn to make this argument. (Jon shows up in the comments and they have an... interesting back and forth.) And, for broader context, Elizabeth Sampat brought up how, if Ian Bogost were a woman, male gamers would certainly accuse him of trying to ban narrative games, but, since he’s a man, his arguments will probably be used by male gamers to dismiss narrative indie games.

Before I get to the thoughts I want to add to this discussion, I’ll focus on one of the better exchanges I saw on Twitter: Scott Benson brought up what we could call The Myth of the Medium Store: the Medium Store is the place where, once you’ve thought of a killer story you want to tell, you pick out the best medium for telling it. The Games Are Bad At Stories take typically stems from the idea that most game narratives would be better served had they picked a different medium from the Medium Store.

Scott points out that, in the real world, Medium Stores don’t exist. Giant Sparrow didn’t make What Remains of Edith Finch because they thought it would work better as a game than as a film; they made it as a game because they’re game designers. I run into this framing in my own work and it causes me all kinds of anxiety - why do I make video essays? Do I adequately justify the use of video in my work? Couldn’t I just write articles like a normal person? And I can come up with all kinds of answers to this question: video allows me to illustrate points in a matter of seconds that would take paragraphs to render in text; I think text is just as much a medium as video, and I don’t think most print articles have to justify their use of text; these days video reaches a wider audience than text does on the internet, which makes it a more viable medium for me. But these are all ways of answer a question that I no longer believe is worth asking. I make video essays because I’m a video essayist. In some fantasy world where anyone can become good at any medium, maybe I would choose print over video. But, in this world, with this brain I was stuck with, I am better at video essays than I am at writing articles. I enjoy it more. My writing works best when it’s meant to be read aloud. Video works for me. That’s reason enough.

And my favorite response to Scott’s tweets (included in the link above) was Carolyn Petit’s: “A movie with the same plot as Gone Home would be fundamentally [about] different things, or [about] the same things in fundamentally different ways.“

Carolyn says, in far fewer words that me, what I was trying to get at in the ending of Story Beats: it doesn’t matter whether you think the plot element of “main character makes friends with an inanimate object” works “better” in Castaway or Portal, because the two are accessing completely different sets of emotions in the audience. Watching Tom Hanks say goodbye to Wilson and throwing the Companion Cube in an incinerator yourself are not the same experience. Comparing them is like comparing a chicken egg to a Faberge egg; which is better? The question is meaningless. You can’t cook with a Faberge egg and you don’t leave a chicken egg on your mantle. They are superficially similar but they serve very different purposes.

(And after watching the Super Bunnyhop video about What Remains of Edith Finch’s Cannery level, I don’t understand how Bogost can argue that this scene would work better as a non-interactive film.)

So, most of the valid talking points having been picked over, what’s left for me to say?

I think what’s most frustrating to me about Bogost’s take, and takes of this kind, is that it’s easy. I should throw Bogost a bone and mention that he has authored some very, very good games writing in his time (and so have Koster, Lantz, and Blow). I don’t mean to sell him short. But writing off interactive narrative is and always has been intellectually lazy.

It’s not difficult to look at a medium and see what it has difficulty doing that another medium does well. Video games have trouble with pacing, with players who fuck with the system instead of roleplaying, and with branching narratives quickly becoming too unwieldy to author content for. Movies have none of these problems, so it’s very easy to point at these issues and say Edith Finch would be better as a movie.

What is much harder, and, to me, a lot more interesting, is articulating what a storytelling medium does well.

Yes, movies fair better than games in these areas: they have tight pacing, the protagonists stay in character, and their narratives are linear. But those qualities are not what makes movie stories good. We don’t walk out of a movie raving about how the story didn’t branch and the main character didn’t jump up and down on their sidekick’s head. What really makes a movie work at storytelling is often more intangible, and harder to fit into a pithy list of reasons why movies are better than video games at telling stories.

It would be just as easy, and just as intellectually lazy, to mount a defense of telling stories in novels and not in films. After all, films have a famously hard time adapting themselves from novels without drastic changes. Movies tend to be very external, where novels can easily give us a character’s thoughts, and the only (inelegant) solution most movies offer for this is voiceover. Movies tend to be capped at 2 hours, 3 tops unless you’re on the arthouse circuit, and that streamlining tends to be far, far less nuanced than a novel that may take the better part of a month to work through. But, again, no one says what makes novels great is that they are long and very internal - by that definition, Hemingway was a terrible writer.

What makes a medium good at storytelling is a set of mostly aesthetic reactions. What makes movies good at stories is their essence: moving pictures can do things that text can’t. Watching a semi-truck flip over in The Dark Knight works in a way it never would on the page, in the same way the narrative payoff at the end of Braid works in a way that it never would on the silver screen.

When we start talking about a medium’s essence, it’s tempting to get, well, essentialist: that if that hard-to-quantify something about games is interactivity, than games should focus on that interactivity to the exclusion of as much else as possible. Games are systems, so they should focus on systems, and systems work better when they aren’t hampered by stories. But, again, this is like saying a movie shouldn’t involve sound because sound is a radio thing, and shouldn’t involve words because that’s a book thing, and shouldn’t have actors because that’s a theater thing - motion pictures are at their best when they are just pictures and motion. This is, obviously, ludicrous. Games can be just as additive as any other medium. Games are moving pictures, and text, and music, and actors, and interactivity. Even a tiny amount of interactivity added to an otherwise mostly filmic experience can make all the difference - this is what makes The Walking Dead work.

We are acclimated to the ways that telling stories in any medium other than games is weird. Films never mounted a defense against “why isn’t this a novel?” We just raised a few generations of people with narrative films until they forgot to ask the question, until no one would think to ask such a dipshit question. Novels, movies, plays, radio dramas, operas, they all have their weirdnesses as storytelling media, we are just so acclimated to those weirdnesses that we don’t see them. We see past them to what makes them valuable.

I’ve spent the last couple months while I was finishing up school keeping myself level by playing a lot of adventure games. I love adventure games. If someone is giving me a lens through which something I love is worse, I will accept that lens if it reveals discrimination, racism, homophobia; “this thing you love is bigoted” is a worthwhile perspective. “This thing you love is, by the criteria I’ve just outlined, inauthentic” is not a worthwhile perspective. “What Remains of Edith Finch would work better as a film” is not dissimilar from “What Remains of Edith Finch is not a real game.” It’s a way of saying that an experience you may have found worthwhile wasn’t actually worthwhile, and I don’t see how this enriches anything. This won’t make better games. This won’t make better stories. This just tells designers (not directly but implicitly) not to make games they want to make and players not to enjoy games that they enjoy.

Ian Bogost isn’t saying anything that Jon Blow wasn’t saying in 2008. Every time a piece like this gets written, all the people who enjoy stories in games come out and write their rebuttals, and however many months later another article comes out that ignores every bit of it. This conversation doesn’t advance because the people arguing against story in games consider the conversation over. They repeat themselves as though they’re waiting for everyone to get the message. Meanwhile, people like Aaron Reid and Porpentine and Anna Anthropy and Brendon Chung keep doing unprecedented things with stories in games and they keep finding their audience. Only one side of the game narrative conversation is advancing, and that’s the side that interests me.

It’s not a real discussion. This is little more than a way of “heating up the takes.” An article about Flappy Bird that says it’s kind of janky in a way that’s interesting is a valid but rather uninteresting article; an article about how Flappy Bird proves that all games are grotesque? That’s a hot take. Ditto how an article about how What Remains of Edith Finch is interesting but might have worked better as a film contorts itself into an article about how the entire medium of games has failed at storytelling. And, I’m sorry all, but I’m over it. I hear new arguments defending stories against Ludologists every few months, and I haven’t heard a new argument against game narrative in nine years. These opinions are not just bad, they’re boring.

So can we be done with this now?

#writings #interactive story #ludology vs narratology #ian bogost

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