#i might come by to rb stuff i'm tagged in like i have today

[desultory-novice]

Been awhile since I had seen your stuff, and I really enjoy what you’ve been coming up with! Glad to see you’re having fun

(Also, how did you start here, so to speak? I would love to be an active creator in the kirblr community, but since I just lurk and rb because I don’t have the energy/confidence to create, I just feel like an unwelcome stalker LOL. Sorry if this is too much!)

Oh, gosh, thank you so much! I'm a little impressed at how things have turned out after barely two years(?) here myself!

I don't know if my methods could ever work for anyone else as they do me, as I attribute a lot of "this" to serendipity but...

...It seems to me I really took off after opening my inbox up to doing detailed ask memes about the characters. Again, this was kind of luck on my part because I spoke very lovingly (albeit truthfully!) about a few mega popular characters, which caused two of their fandom BNFs to kindly reblog my posts, and that sent a bunch more asks for the WHOLE rest of the Kirby cast my way!

I'm sorry to say, it does take a lot of energy though. But I do get the struggle, as I'm often exhausted by life/lots of jobs. However, if you can find any sort of mental "trick" to keep yourself going, you might discover you have more energy than you think inside you!

(Me, I'm very visual, and I keep a collection of my favorite fanart on hand. If I think I've exhausted myself on a character/ran out of ideas of things to talk about, I'll browse through my personal "gallery" and it will help me to remember characters/events/interesting points.)

As to the matter of confidence, you've probably heard the whole "fake it to you make it" bit and to a degree, at least, it's true. I've had a couple of posts where I've flooded the tags with things like "OMG this is so bad and I'm so sorry!" or "I had no time to work on this and it shows~" or "if this sucks it's because life is crushing my soul and I just want to sleep for a thousand years..." annnnnd unfortunately...

...even if it's how you're feeling At The Time, those things can make people feel like they're intruding into your space by liking or reblogging it. It's like, if you're telling us something so personal and private, maybe you really only want to hear from a friend right now, and not a stranger...? What I've done is I've told myself it's okay to write out those low self-esteem thoughts elsewhere but try to let the people who are here for the art/images/videos/writing/discussions just enjoy your art/images/videos/writing/discussions.

If you've got something to get off your chest, don't feel like you have to hold it inside, but don't hold your audience captive either.

(Also, something else fun about this: if you cast out positivity, you may find that it comes back to you, and when you look again at that thing you shared, it was NOT as "awful" as you thought.)

Now, a lot of that was about "external" confidence or what you display. As for internal confidence, that's... kind of a constant struggle. We all -- and by all, I I mean even famous published creators -- have times when we think our work isn't good enough. Annnd...

...Well, it isn't always great. But the fact that something isn't great now (even if it's the absolute best we can do at the time) doesn't mean we have no skill at something! We all have to start somewhere. And sometimes "somewhere" is a piece of art or writing or theory or humorous content that only 1-2 people think is "...Eh, not bad."

My first "hit it big" piece? My "Moon's Haunted" Kirby meme? Ohhh man, I can't STAND to look at now! I redrew it a few months back and if I were to redraw it today, it'd look better still, probably. The key is that I tried (...and that I meme-posted when the game was going viral >.> ) and I think that shone through??

(...It might be silly, but there IS a Nintendo Direct tomorrow. Probably no Kirby news, as I assume Vanpool's closure will bring an end to us getting multiple Kirby titles a year, but if you really want to try and take that ^ path, you can always get up early/stay up late and ready yourself to post commentary on any news!)

That doesn't just go for art, but writing/theories/HC as well. I myself find it a little sad when someone starts on a post and then will just trail off with "...lol I dunno, didn't think about it that hard."

"Don't say that, person on the internet," I cry! Do you realize how much information is at your fingertips right now? You can google for things even if you only know it as "that thing in that one movie about the fruit." You can watch a Youtube video in 5 minutes explaining the mechanics of something you've never seen or ever hope to do before! You can even watch a Youtube playthrough of a Kirby thing you forgot instead of saying "You forgot!" Don't know how to draw cloaks? Pinterest has millions of references! Don't like Pinterest? Just google "cloaks, Pinterest" and click on the images tab and you will never have to log into that accursed site! It just takes WANTING to.

Though sometimes, I think people write that out of embarrassment? Maybe they DID think about it but they don't think anyone would be interested? Or maybe they really didn't think about X or Y but didn't want to feel like they were neglecting anybody and that something is better than nothing. Which it is, but LOVE is even more important!

...And love, especially in a fandom space, can be ~complicated~

Like I mentioned above, I'm LUCKY that my top favorite characters also come close to topping the rest of "the fandom's" list. But as I've said before, I love every character in Kirby. Even the ones-people-want-to-throw-off-a-bridge-into-a-waste-treatment-plant..

And if I'd started off my tumblr as a "The Susie Haltmann Appreciation Blog!" as opposed to my actual "Hey I'm Completely Obsessed About Marx and Magolor and I Think About Them All The Time (...but I also like the Haltmanns from a story perspective for their heartrending tragedy that hits close to home for me...) Blog" I don't know if we'd be having this conversation right now. ^^;

(It doesn't just have to be all about controversy/"discourse" related stuff either. I could have started a "Daily Sillydillo" blog and had to retire it in a month due to low levels of interaction. The concept of fandom favorites might not be very egalitarian, when every character deserves to have their story enjoyed, but sometimes, strong love can make up for the lack of eyes on a thing. Occasionally ^^)

...Anyway, you might not have the energy, at least not all the time, and confidence might be a little low right now too, but you love Kirby, right? You have passion for it? Passion can get you a lot! And also, there's a few methods of interaction that, for personal reasons, I could not choose that have done wonders for everyone else!

For example, I have some old, unhealed trauma about OCs, but there's a whole hu~ge section of Kirblr that loves OCs and, as far as I've seen (??) tries to be really supportive about them?

Lastly, I can guarantee you, you are NOT a stalker and anyone who thinks being a "quiet supportive fan" equates to being a stalker should consider moving away from thinking of themselves and/or others in that negative way. You have stalked nobody! You have only shown an active interest in others! That is a POSITIVE thing!

And on that note, you're definitely not unwelcome either! Especially if you're one of the precious, wonderful people out there who reblog lots! If you want to get your toes wet, why not test the waters and build your confidence in this space by adding some of your thoughts onto your reblogs? You could build a rep/connections that way!

TLDR, sometimes gaining an audience/a space is a magic trick that no one knows the secret to. Other times, it is the result of months and months and months of hard, lonesome persistence.

The best advice I can give you is advice I would give myself:

-Be kind if you can, if you cannot, then be understanding -Demonstrate care about your interests and those of others -Forgive yourself for being at the beginning of your journey

-Enthusiasm, sincerity, and love are warm lights in this world of ours that can, at times, seem so dim and dreary. Light a little lantern for yourself and remember to laugh loud with joy that life is also so amazingly, ridiculously magical and before you know it, others will find their way to your light to add their lantern to yours!

[pepsiiwho]

Thank u for rb-ing the ask game. Here are 5000 asks: ♥️, 🎁 , 👓, 💕, 🍬, and 💌. These are just for you to keep: 💖💓💓♥️💞💕💘💞💘💗❤️💘💘♥️💖💓💖❤️💖💞💓💞💖💗

So many things here should I even answer this in one big thing....

This one is getting it's own post I have too much to say for it but the short answer is "[sound here] sounded like rocks hitting a wall" if you actually read my work you should know this one it's my calling card at this point.

It gets long after this sorry guys

2. This one isn't anything you'd like, a shame I just sent it to you but here's a little piece of the most recent WIP I have as of (checks watch) 3 hours ago. BG3 WIP Title pending.

The woman walks out with her tail between her legs, literally, and Alabaster watches the door close soundlessly behind her as if commanded. The silence between them sits for a moment a second or two before Alabaster speaks. “She's pretty. You might have a type though.”  “What are you doing here?” She didn’t think a sleep-ruffled Astarion would be the one she’d be interacting with when she decided to pay a visit today, but the sight is pleasing all the same. His hair is as white as it’s ever been, only a touch longer. She isn’t sure if actual vampires are capable of being surprised (something something the alertness of darkness or something) but the expression on Asraion’s face was what she would coin as ‘your lover coming home to see you with your mistress' . “You missed me?” He asks. It doesn’t come out like a question, as breathy as it sounds.  “I missed you” She responds. She rolls her shoulders, getting ready for the dance that is talking to Astarion. “I also need your help.”  “You came back because you need me?” There's a sharp smile slowly making it’s way onto his face, laughlines bending to build the expression. He’s sitting up, moving to reach her height. She nods, pulling at the tightly wound strings in his chest, plucking absently.  “I need you.” She responds. Talking to him feels like playing an instrument you haven't touched in a long time, slowly allowing muscle memory to take over so the music can once again be moved by your masterful hands. He smiles full now, as if realizing something she doesn’t know, and she’s reminded that you never really forget how to tune an instrument.

3. What helps me focus when I write... booty shaking music for throwing ass OR hating whatever is happening around me. no in-between.

4. This is a really hard question because if we mean like, emotionally? I could cop out and give a three way tie between Complimentary Soap (it isn't good I'm just nostalgic), Nintendo Direct (Circa June 2021) (it is good and I'm nostalgic) and Like A Brick In The Wall (good and new but god it's chaptered.) But, right now I'm gonna say my most recent fic I posted Going Home; All Over Again. I really love it even tho no one will ever read it (save you). The curse of rare pairs.

5. Okay another long one let's go. I'm only counting things with multiple pics posted...

HADES -

I Missed You Terribly And Like A Dream— You Appeared, Smiling At Me, Just So

Most of my stuff from here isn't good anymore, and while there's another that's more self indulgent and scratches the itch inside my body that aches dully for more Hypnos content at all times, this one reads the best rn. So it win.

HAIKYUU-

Tequilas, Margaritas and Seawater

everything in this fandom is old and arguably bad so nostalgia points carry weight here. This. one was a gift and idk why but it reads amazingly. holds up still

FE3H -

Like A Brick In The Wall

All fe fics are the DEVIL because of any in this list I CARE about these the most no competition. Anyway. This fic didn't win the previous bracket of my fav fic ever but it is my fav in the tag. Don't ask me to explain. I'm sorry.

CSM -

I Squint Out My Peripheral, Peaking Through My Fingers To See You

I don't work here man... I hate this goddamn pic its so good.

DRV3-

Nintendo Direct (Circa June 2021)

She's gonna do it every time... V3 hospital au I lOVE you.

(Listing out my written fandoms like this is the saddest thing ever my GOD I'm cringey)

6. I feel like the tropes I love most I never write myself... it's honestly kinda fandom specific but across the board...? Royalty au. not regency but kinda. A little to the left.

[jenology-archive]

hiatus!! or maybe semi-hiatus... smth like that! 😙😙 this hellsite is too much

[gatual]

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[bluewinnerangel]

*knock knock* 🚪👀 may I...uh... contribute to your wonderful Kiwi analysis? THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN TO READ btw!!!!! Ahhh I love your excitement and enthusiasm it really makes me feel the same <3 two things (not very significant but just wanted to add): the lyric “I think she said, ‘I’m having your baby’” is so interesting to me in the context of how it’s sung. “I think she said” sounds so... like you said a lot throughout the song... petty and somewhat falsely nonchalant BUT THEN “I’m having your baby” is SCREAMED at us so hard I’m like ah ok thank you for spitting in my face my dude. So maybe it’s like “this is supposed to be something I don’t know or care about BUT I DOOO AHHHHHH”. Also, the lines, “when she’s alone she comes home to a cactus in a black dress, such an actress”, “she sits beside me like a silloette, hard candy dripping on me till my feet are wet” sound super...dark to me. Black dresses are worn at funerals. Silloette could be a ghost. “Hard candy” could maybeee be blood (that’s a stretch but anyways). It’s literally haunting him these thoughts of her. He’s lgoing crazy from imagining this ghost or whatever. (*cough cough* maybe that’s how they want him to feel... haunted... unable to escape...driven to madness) Anyhow, I don’t analyze much but I wanted to throw in stuff I thought of while reading your awesome analysis. <3

Hi! Thank you <3 Yes feel free to contribute, for the kiwi devotees there's all kinda tiny additions in asks today (I try to tag everything #kiwi ) and the rb tags of the analysis!

Anyway yes to dark Harry tho although I don't mention it a lot, with Harry there's definitely this LOOK AT ME BEING HAPPY YEY LET'S DANCE AND SING WERE ALL FINE EVERYTHING IS FINE all our friends are going to die and i want everything to end i know you dont give a fk about my nightmares anyway also can that woman just fuck the fuck off and i might be smiling now but im crying later and YYEEYY KEEP DANCING!!!

Some see that as fake and annoying and it just rubs them the wrong way, I think it's relatable honestly. It's just you gotta put your happy mask on (like everyone at work anyway, in general most of the time, it's not limited to public figures like him whatsoever). So yeah for sure he's gone dark dark before and probably will continue to (floating dumpster fire I'm looking at you that's not gonna solely result in sugary watermelons i don't think) do so, and I think it's very much possible these lines are meant a whole lot darker than what I mentioned in the analysis. I just usually don't wanna highlight it to much because it's a very tiny step to take a tumble and fall into a deep dark putting rocks in your pockets hole and I'm just not too comfortable going there. So I usually just leave a tiny trace of it in the analyses and then people can pick up on it if they want to but I just kinda hope they don't honestly. It's all interpretations anyway. Hope he's ok, that's all.

(of course another link to the kiwi analysis)