Been awhile since I had seen your stuff, and I really enjoy what you’ve been coming up with! Glad to see you’re having fun
(Also, how did you start here, so to speak? I would love to be an active creator in the kirblr community, but since I just lurk and rb because I don’t have the energy/confidence to create, I just feel like an unwelcome stalker LOL. Sorry if this is too much!)
Oh, gosh, thank you so much! I'm a little impressed at how things have turned out after barely two years(?) here myself!
I don't know if my methods could ever work for anyone else as they do me, as I attribute a lot of "this" to serendipity but...
...It seems to me I really took off after opening my inbox up to doing detailed ask memes about the characters. Again, this was kind of luck on my part because I spoke very lovingly (albeit truthfully!) about a few mega popular characters, which caused two of their fandom BNFs to kindly reblog my posts, and that sent a bunch more asks for the WHOLE rest of the Kirby cast my way!
I'm sorry to say, it does take a lot of energy though. But I do get the struggle, as I'm often exhausted by life/lots of jobs. However, if you can find any sort of mental "trick" to keep yourself going, you might discover you have more energy than you think inside you!
(Me, I'm very visual, and I keep a collection of my favorite fanart on hand. If I think I've exhausted myself on a character/ran out of ideas of things to talk about, I'll browse through my personal "gallery" and it will help me to remember characters/events/interesting points.)
As to the matter of confidence, you've probably heard the whole "fake it to you make it" bit and to a degree, at least, it's true. I've had a couple of posts where I've flooded the tags with things like "OMG this is so bad and I'm so sorry!" or "I had no time to work on this and it shows~" or "if this sucks it's because life is crushing my soul and I just want to sleep for a thousand years..." annnnnd unfortunately...
...even if it's how you're feeling At The Time, those things can make people feel like they're intruding into your space by liking or reblogging it. It's like, if you're telling us something so personal and private, maybe you really only want to hear from a friend right now, and not a stranger...? What I've done is I've told myself it's okay to write out those low self-esteem thoughts elsewhere but try to let the people who are here for the art/images/videos/writing/discussions just enjoy your art/images/videos/writing/discussions.
If you've got something to get off your chest, don't feel like you have to hold it inside, but don't hold your audience captive either.
(Also, something else fun about this: if you cast out positivity, you may find that it comes back to you, and when you look again at that thing you shared, it was NOT as "awful" as you thought.)
Now, a lot of that was about "external" confidence or what you display. As for internal confidence, that's... kind of a constant struggle. We all -- and by all, I I mean even famous published creators -- have times when we think our work isn't good enough. Annnd...
...Well, it isn't always great. But the fact that something isn't great now (even if it's the absolute best we can do at the time) doesn't mean we have no skill at something! We all have to start somewhere. And sometimes "somewhere" is a piece of art or writing or theory or humorous content that only 1-2 people think is "...Eh, not bad."
My first "hit it big" piece? My "Moon's Haunted" Kirby meme? Ohhh man, I can't STAND to look at now! I redrew it a few months back and if I were to redraw it today, it'd look better still, probably. The key is that I tried (...and that I meme-posted when the game was going viral >.> ) and I think that shone through??
(...It might be silly, but there IS a Nintendo Direct tomorrow. Probably no Kirby news, as I assume Vanpool's closure will bring an end to us getting multiple Kirby titles a year, but if you really want to try and take that ^ path, you can always get up early/stay up late and ready yourself to post commentary on any news!)
That doesn't just go for art, but writing/theories/HC as well. I myself find it a little sad when someone starts on a post and then will just trail off with "...lol I dunno, didn't think about it that hard."
"Don't say that, person on the internet," I cry! Do you realize how much information is at your fingertips right now? You can google for things even if you only know it as "that thing in that one movie about the fruit." You can watch a Youtube video in 5 minutes explaining the mechanics of something you've never seen or ever hope to do before! You can even watch a Youtube playthrough of a Kirby thing you forgot instead of saying "You forgot!" Don't know how to draw cloaks? Pinterest has millions of references! Don't like Pinterest? Just google "cloaks, Pinterest" and click on the images tab and you will never have to log into that accursed site! It just takes WANTING to.
Though sometimes, I think people write that out of embarrassment? Maybe they DID think about it but they don't think anyone would be interested? Or maybe they really didn't think about X or Y but didn't want to feel like they were neglecting anybody and that something is better than nothing. Which it is, but LOVE is even more important!
...And love, especially in a fandom space, can be ~complicated~
Like I mentioned above, I'm LUCKY that my top favorite characters also come close to topping the rest of "the fandom's" list. But as I've said before, I love every character in Kirby. Even the ones-people-want-to-throw-off-a-bridge-into-a-waste-treatment-plant..
And if I'd started off my tumblr as a "The Susie Haltmann Appreciation Blog!" as opposed to my actual "Hey I'm Completely Obsessed About Marx and Magolor and I Think About Them All The Time (...but I also like the Haltmanns from a story perspective for their heartrending tragedy that hits close to home for me...) Blog" I don't know if we'd be having this conversation right now. ^^;
(It doesn't just have to be all about controversy/"discourse" related stuff either. I could have started a "Daily Sillydillo" blog and had to retire it in a month due to low levels of interaction. The concept of fandom favorites might not be very egalitarian, when every character deserves to have their story enjoyed, but sometimes, strong love can make up for the lack of eyes on a thing. Occasionally ^^)
...Anyway, you might not have the energy, at least not all the time, and confidence might be a little low right now too, but you love Kirby, right? You have passion for it? Passion can get you a lot! And also, there's a few methods of interaction that, for personal reasons, I could not choose that have done wonders for everyone else!
For example, I have some old, unhealed trauma about OCs, but there's a whole hu~ge section of Kirblr that loves OCs and, as far as I've seen (??) tries to be really supportive about them?
Lastly, I can guarantee you, you are NOT a stalker and anyone who thinks being a "quiet supportive fan" equates to being a stalker should consider moving away from thinking of themselves and/or others in that negative way. You have stalked nobody! You have only shown an active interest in others! That is a POSITIVE thing!
And on that note, you're definitely not unwelcome either! Especially if you're one of the precious, wonderful people out there who reblog lots! If you want to get your toes wet, why not test the waters and build your confidence in this space by adding some of your thoughts onto your reblogs? You could build a rep/connections that way!
TLDR, sometimes gaining an audience/a space is a magic trick that no one knows the secret to. Other times, it is the result of months and months and months of hard, lonesome persistence.
The best advice I can give you is advice I would give myself:
-Be kind if you can, if you cannot, then be understanding
-Demonstrate care about your interests and those of others
-Forgive yourself for being at the beginning of your journey
-Enthusiasm, sincerity, and love are warm lights in this world of ours that can, at times, seem so dim and dreary. Light a little lantern for yourself and remember to laugh loud with joy that life is also so amazingly, ridiculously magical and before you know it, others will find their way to your light to add their lantern to yours!
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I Accept
“So you think I should marry someone I already know.”
“I mean, ideally.”
“You think I should marry you!”
---
Nandor's plan works--confirm Guillermo's love for him by making Guillermo jealous, then marry Guillermo.
Guillermo has lost control of the situation and isn't really sure how to get his life back on course. And also isn't really sure if he wants to.
AO3
“Wait—Wait, you’ve decided to get married but you don’t know who you’re marrying?”
“I will find someone,” Nandor said, equal parts confident and dismissive.
“Are you sure that’s—”
Nandor whirled around, his expression so triumphant it made his eyes gleam.
“I knew it!” he exclaimed, jabbing a finger at Guillermo, who startled back a step.
“What--?”
“I knew you would be jealous!”
“I’m not jealous,” Guillermo sputtered. “I’m just saying—”
“You think I shouldn’t get married at all, hmm?”
“What? No! If you love someone enough to want to marry them, great, good, I’m totally behind it. But if you don’t even know who you’re marrying, that’s getting married just to be married—”
“Ohhh,” Nandor said, hands on hips. “So you think I should marry someone I already know.”
“I mean, ideally.”
“You think I should marry you!”
“--!” said Guillermo, a sort of strangled, choked off inhale of confusion. His mouth opened but all that came out were little croaking noises, not even the starts of words.
“Very well, I accept.”
“Whuh,” Guillermo exhaled. Nandor was beyond smug.
“Ha, you thought you could hide your feelings from me! You are like a glass statue, Guillermo, totally see through.” He turned on his heel and marched out of the room. “Laszlo! Nadja!”
Guillermo, who had been frozen in place, now shot into motion, racing after Nandor who was striding with such purpose he almost seemed to be running.
“Library!” Nadja hollered.
“Wait—wait—wait—” Guillermo gulped, fingers missing Nandor’s cape by inches. “Nandor—”
Nandor threw open the door and marched in. Laszlo tipped his head back to look at Nandor upside down over the back of the couch. Nadja didn’t even slow her rise and fall on Laszlo’s lap, but spared a hand for a brief wave before returning to clutching at Laszlo’s shoulders for balance.
“Hello old chap,” said Laszlo, cheerfully.
“I have an announcement,” Nandor said. “Guillermo and I are getting married.”
Nadja froze. Laszlo froze. Guillermo, almost tripping on the belt of his bathrobe as he stumbled in behind Nandor, froze.
Very slowly, the two vampires’ eyes tracked over to fix on Guillermo, who kept very still, eyes very wide. Husband and wife spoke in unison.
“What.”
“Guillermo proposed, I have accepted.”
“I didn’t!” Guillermo burst out. “I didn’t, you just—”
Nandor waved a dismissive hand. “Yes, yes, I did not wait for you to work your way around to it, but that was what you meant—”
“It wasn’t! I didn’t!” Guillermo said, practically a wail.
“You know how he gets,” Nandor said to Nadja and Laszlo.
“I wasn’t going to—”
“You mean you don’t love me?” Nandor asked. It was not a genuine question, but an accusation. Guillermo went vampire pale.
“This isn’t funny.”
“Oh it’s a joke!” Nadja said, and she and Laszlo exploded into relieved laughter. Guillermo went crimson with misery and humiliation.
But Nandor threw a protective arm around Guillermo’s shoulders, drawing him close against his side and glaring at his roommates.
“It is not a joke!” he snapped, with such force that Nadja and Laszlo stopped laughing immediately.
“Guillermo and I are in love and we are getting married!” He looked down at Guillermo and caught up his hand, squeezing gently. “You know I would never joke about such an important thing.”
Guillermo looked utterly, completely lost, having passed beyond confusion, bewilderment, even incomprehension, and was now letting the situation carry him like driftwood in an ocean storm. Nandor shot one last disapproving look at Nadja and Laszlo, who appeared as lost as Guillermo, and then steered Guillermo gently back out of the library. He kept his arm around Guillermo’s shoulders.
“Come, Guillermo, there is something I wish to give you. Several things, actually! Think of it as an early wedding present…”
-
Guillermo stared at nothing, not even at the camera. He was dressed now, and still a little pale.
“I’m,” he said, and stopped. “I’m not…really sure what happened?”
He went quiet again, eyes flicking around as he struggled to put words to the situation.
“One minute I was trying to stop Nandor from making a terrible life choice and then suddenly…”
He looked up at the camera, utterly lost. He tried to speak a few times but in the end could only shrug helplessly.
“There’s someone I really, really need to talk to, but I can’t, because I can’t get more than five seconds away from Nandor before he—”
“Guillermo~” Nandor appeared in the doorway, grinning. “There you are! Silly rascal, doing the talking heads without me.” He plopped down on the couch next to Guillermo, beaming at the human, who managed a sickly smile. “We are so excited to be getting married.”
Guillermo’s expression turned hunted as Nandor laced their fingers together, apparently ignorant of his fiancé’s torment.
“I admit, I was being a bit sneaky,” Nandor said. “But it can be so hard to get Guillermo to admit to his own feelings.”
“I talk about my feelings!” Guillermo protested. Nandor gave him a fond smile, slightly condescending.
“Only certain feelings, my dearest heart,” Nandor said, and Guillermo had to look away. “Never how you felt about me.” To the camera, Nandor said, “It wasn’t hard to come up with a plan. I knew it would work.” He leaned in and said, with a big beaming grin. “He gets so jealous.”
“I don’t! I wasn’t!” Guillermo protested, weakly. “I’m not!”
“Of course, not anymore,” Nandor said. He brushed the back of his hand against Guillermo’s cheek. “Now you know I am yours.” He said it not as a flirtation, not as a sweet nothing, but as a fact. Something they both knew to be true.
Guillermo swallowed hard, and stared at the floor.
-
It was daylight. Guillermo was standing on the front lawn, in the sunlight, staring at his phone in his hands.
“I had to come out here to do it,” the voiceover said. “It’s the only place I can go where Nandor literally cannot follow me.”
The curtains in the window twitched, as if someone was trying to see out without letting any light in.
Guillermo held the phone to his ear and rocked on his toes, gnawing on his lip.
“Hey! Hey, hi. Yeah, I’m sorry I haven’t called in a while, it’s been—yeah, things got really crazy over here. Like. Really crazy. Insane. Absolutely insane.”
Guillermo listened for a while, staring at nothing.
“Yeah. Yeah. Uhuh. Listen, I called for a specific reason, actually. There’s something…I wish I could have this conversation face-to-face, but…” He braced himself and shut his eyes. “I think–I mean…I want us to see other people.”
Whatever was said on the other end of the line made him wince. He opened his eyes and gave the camera a pleading look before turning his back on it. The camera turned away, Guillermo’s voice fading into a mumble, and focused on the house—and the still-shifting curtains—before going dark.
“Who were you talking to?” Nandor asked, poking his head out of the safety of the library as Guillermo came inside. Guillermo slid off his coat, expression drawn but slightly relieved–that of someone who has done a very onerous task and found it not quite as bad as it could have been.
“Nobody. Just…a contractor, someone who could maybe help with the house. You should be asleep.”
“You were all upset. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
“I’m fine. Go back to your coffin.”
“You will need to tuck me in again,” Nandor said, waggling his eyebrows. Guillermo visibly bit back a sigh.
“Guillermo has been quite overwhelmed by the force of his love for me,” Nandor’s voiceover said as he climbed up into his coffin, his fingers tangled with Guillermo’s. “It is not surprising—we have loved each other for so long, but I think he never expected anything to happen between us.”
Nandor pressed Guillermo’s palm to his chest, over where his heart would be beating if he was still alive, and smiled adoringly up at him. Guillermo had to put in some effort to work his hand free.
He shut the coffin lid and gave the camera a weary look.
“Goodnight, joy of my heart!” Nandor called, slightly muffled.
“Goodnight.”
“So even though it is obvious how much he loves me, he is having a difficult time showing it.”
Guillermo walked straight to his room and sat down on the bed, burying his face in his hands.
“We are so very happy together.”
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