#i sill put this in teht ag acrually

[build-a-buddy]

I think the most recent object friend - Slushie - who I thought I'd lost perception of sentience for is actually fine and 'there', I just really needed him to... be 'merely' an object for a little bit.

He says he didn’t really mind, although for him, it was a bit awkward to be treated that way-- he's a considerable bit like PC, in that he doesn't really connect or ID with being a object.

This is the hard part, him being intended to be 'just' a plushie and then not being 'just', being his perceived sentient and his own person. It's unfair to treat him as a proxy, but it's also very painful to see something that looks like that character (who is both a comfort and a partner -- I'm both ficto + a selfshipper) and nor be able to interact with them in the way I had hoped-- ie, as a 'mere' object.

(Not that objects could stand in for my F/O anyway. That's not how my relationship with him works. I just had hoped for a simple comfort item...)

It's not Slushie's fault. It wasn't PC's either, and it isn't Fluffy's. I think at this point I need to realize any representation I get of my F/O, it's likely to be its own thing, and not 'merely' an item to me and thus can't be interacted with in the way I'd wish.

Which, I'm not saying I don't appreciate the friendship. It's just a lot. I don't think nonPOSIC folks get when I say that. The relationships -- friendships, etc -- I have with my objects are basically the same as those I have with human bodied people, and that means they're as complicated and messy as anything else. Sometimes you want an object to just...be. But I don't get to choose. So.