#i still do not have a design for fix it au anakin LOL

[stealingpotatoes]

Anakin looking up at future Ahsoka: Ah, okay no I get it now. I see what you were talking about Obi-Wan: So you'll be sorry for rubbing it in my face that you're taller than me? Anakin, with a wide grin: What? No! Now there are TWO of us taller than you! Obi-Wan: I should have joined Dooku when he asked

YOU'RE RIGHT screw the time travel au tho, this can happen in every fix-it au ever as well

[spikybanana]

fic writer tag game

@to-proudly-go thank u for the tag pal <3<3 (I very definitely love your poetic angst & your art)

How many works do you have on ao3?

25 :) 15 for hp and 10 for star wars

What's your ao3 word count?

144,107!

What fandoms do you write for?

hp and star wars, though I've definitely brought the marauders fandom habits (delusional obsession w main character's dad and his best friends) straight to the prequels

What are your top five fics by kudos?

"trust" the inscription said (hp/wolfstar)

then he came home (hp/wolfstar)

don't let's die as heroes (hp/jegulily)

the prophecies spoke of you and I (sw/obikin) (which is also my most recent work, so it's crazy to me that it's up here)

slipped back in (hp/wolfstar)

Do you respond to comments?

I always do eventually!! even if it's the smallest comment I like to send a smiley face in reply. It's just that I might take forever coming up with what to say, especially for the super nice ones ;3;

What's the fic you write with the happiest ending?

hmm I'd say don't let's die as heroes for the marauders (literally turns 3 canonical funerals into a wedding) and Designation for obikin. & I usually write happy endings (minus canon fics) even if they're more "the future is uncertain but bright" rather than happily ever afters

Do you get hate on fics?

none so far! & they better not because if I do get hate I will cry

Do you write smut? What kind?

listen. listen. this is a whole Thing. as your neighbourhood ace, smut is like science fiction/horror to me. which is to say I have written both mlm and wlw sex scenes lol. it happens very rarely, but it has happened before & will happen again.

Do you write cross-overs?

I hope you know that I'm constantly thinking about how sirius/remus and anakin/obi-wan are homomorphic creatures and I really want them to meet. but also, so far, no. except if you count the wolfstar sw au sitting in the docs.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not afaik!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

not afaik either!

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

I don't think so, but I would absolutely love to try

What's your all time favourite ship?

wolfstar and obikin are the same ship actually, so both. (unserious)

What's your WIP you like to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I read back on What You Will earlier today and scared myself so possibly that. (it's a jegulily parody of Shakespeare's twelfth night, and has already been rewritten from scratch twice, so maybe mayyybe there's a sign)

What are your writing strengths?

errrrr. occasionally poetic-ish description? I like writing pretty vibes. and occasionally punchy-feely stuff. where you stand above & survey a life through tiny poignant snippets far apart. quite a few of my fics are like that

What are your writing weaknesses?

so many. definitely more than I'm aware of too. I feel I'm awful at pacing & easily get bogged down in tiny details, which is why long fics have not worked out for me lol. It's also hard for characters to feel real to me, like I'd just stop in the middle of a story and think "my darling I do not understand you at all"

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I definitely love when I see them, but I've not tried it myself. it feels impossible to merge Mandarin and English in a way that feels natural (or write it down in English characters), even though come to think of it I do it with my brother all the time. huh.

First fandom you wrote for?

drarry! and I still wanna go back sometimes

Favourite fic you've ever written?

awh but I always like them better before they're words on the screen/on ao3. ideas are just pure vibes and potential yk? rather than a dozen annoying imperfections you're not good enough to fix. lol sorry, if I have to pick, Once Upon a Green Haze. it's unfinished & only has 3 chapters for now, but I like them.

I've seen this going around the dash for a while now, so open tag :)

[thunderheadfred]

*stomps foot*

OKAY. Here are some of my totally out-of-order brainstorms and uncensored word-vomit (so. much. capslock) re: my apparently unkillable Star Wars Prequel AU. It’s garbage and so am I but oh-fucking-well we knew this already.

I mean, this is all I’ve been able to fucking think about since TLJ, a film I still haven’t actually made up my mind on (but I keep leaning more and more toward a wishy-washy “ehhhhhhhhhhhh??”)

Hi, welcome to the new Star War. AKA: The Clone War. It starts right away, right in Episode I. 

Why… would it not? Why fucking waste a whole TWO movies, only to invent a poorly justified, overly complicated political scenario that only pays off at the END in the SECOND episode? 

Why show us so LITTLE of the Clone War, except via tie-in animated TV shows that I never watched because I was so fucking angry about the entire idea of taking the war out of the Star War? 

THE MOVIE IS CALLED STAR WARS IT NEEDS A WAR IN IT OMG

The Jedi are already a dying order, barely clinging to relevance. 

The Republic is a huge and sprawling bureaucratic clusterfuck, and there’s little the few remaining Jedi can or will do to fix it. They’re the last vestiges of a once glorious Old Republic, and at this point, they’re just trying to preserve what little remains of their religion. 

They’ve been known to intercede in extreme circumstances, popping out of the woodwork every few decades to turn the tide of some battle or other, which lends to their now-legendary reputation. 

But they don’t go from being one of the major powers in the universe (with a big glittering temple on Coruscant) to having Han Solo casually shrugging and calling them all a bunch of hokey losers in like… less than two decades. 

w ha t. no?

No R2 and Threepio. 

Like, I get it, you wanna sell toys with brand recognition but you guys. It’s Star Wars. Fucking sell some different toys. 

This coming from a woman who bought an R2-D2 carry-on during her fucking honeymoon. I love R2 but you should have invented A BRAND-NEW BOOP BOOP YOU COWARDS. 

*rubs BB-8 on the belly*

There’s no prophecy. There are no motherfucking wtf “midichlorians”

sorry, all that mumbo-jumbo was tragically lost in the same warehouse fire that claimed all the other pointless distractions in these hellpit disaster films

The closest we get to anything resembling a prophecy are a few cryptic yet giggly words from Yoda about the Force being out of balance throughout the galaxy, and various visions Yoda has had of the future - and all of these with many branches, many possible paths. 

Basically a very ESB-Yoda-Esque “ohhhhh the universe might be doomed but lol don’t listen to me I’m old and just want a nap, go away”

Queen Amidala is still young, Naboo is still gloriously beautiful, and the Gungans still exist, but the planet’s very existence is under direct threat by a crumbling Republic that is desperate to protect its borders at any cost. 

The conflict between the Gungans and the Naboo is based around a disagreement on how to deal with the threat of imminent destruction (all in the name of funding Palpatine’s Big Giant Scary Clone Army). The proud Gungans favor war, but Amidala knows that’s a fight they cannot win.

Going to be honest and admit that I love every fucking visual design decision made in the Phantom Menace (somehow this eye for style evaporated in the latter two prequels as soon as George Lucas’ boner for blue-screens ironically ruined special effects forever) 

And that includes Jar Jar Binks. Jar Jar’s animation looks dated now but the design work on him and the underwater Gungan city were both chock-full of potential, imho. 

I just wish they all hadn’t sounded like… that.

Darth Maul doesn’t get thrown down a random reactor tube like a big baby, he lives to the sequels and gets more lines.

WHY INVENT A GUY THAT LOOKS LIKE SCI-FI PUNK SATAN YET HAS A POSH, BUTTERY-SMOOTH ENGLISH ACCENT AND THEN THROW HIM INTO A PIT 

WTF THIS IS MORE INSULTING THAN NIHLUS FUCKING KRYIK 

Yoda uses a lightsaber and starts bouncing off the walls like a ping-pong ball… as soon as I feel like CHEWING OFF ONE OF MY OWN FUCKING ARMS FOR FUN

crawl back into the Lament Configuration where you fucking BELONG, CGI lightsaber Yoda

I STILL WAKE UP SCREAMING AT NIGHT

No Jango Fett. No Boba Fett. Just…

Just stop.

No Qui-Gon Jinn.

I love you Liam Neeson, but what was the point of you in the prequels… like, at all? 

Instead, Obi-Wan should have been Yoda’s newly-Knighted apprentice, and he should have met and befriended Anakin all on his own like a goddamned grown up.

Cuz… why would you distract from the very foundations of the Vader+Ben relationship by adding in a throwaway character? 

I mean (haa haaaaaaa) unless you planned on only ever telling us about all Anakin and Obi-Wan’s - **totally tubular** - bonding experiences without EVER SHOWING US A SINGLE FUCKING ONE OF THOSE EXPERIENCES GGRAHARHAAHH

DON’T MIND ME I’M STILL IRREPARABLY DAMAGED BECAUSE OBI-WAN AND ANAKIN ONLY EVER SEEMED TO HAVE WITTY BANTER IN ELEVATORS 

AND IN SAID ELEVATORS ALL THEY DID WAS REFERENCE THINGS THAT HAD HAPPENED AT SOME NEBULOUS POINT OFFSCREEN 

I MEAN WAS THIS SOME SPECIFIC SADOMASOCHISTIC KINK OF ONE OF THE PRODUCERS 

F U C K

Okay. And. *deep breath*

The Skywalker twins, Anakin and Adaleia

No mom in sight - all they’ve ever had is one another. As orphaned kids, they came up with their own last name, Skywalker, to represent their dreams of freedom 

BECAUSE FUCK YOU PREDESTINED MIDICHLORIAN VIRGIN BIRTHS

Aren’t goddamn babies. Teens/young-adults played by grown-ass human beings who can actually act their way out of a paper bag. 

I don’t hate Jake Lloyd OR Hayden Christensen. But GOD. They were both so poorly cast and badly directed that it hurts my liver to remember it.

Speaking of which: is the role of Anakin Skywalker cursed? I mean. Is it? Let’s be real. Was George Lucas ever dismissive to an old crone on the side of the road?

Oh– AND???????

Padme doesn’t fucking DIE.