#i think a big part of hunger games niki is that she is just so. repressed basically

[faebriel]

ough *roblox damage noise* thinking about niki’s speeches at the green festival/doomsday but in the context of hunger games au

burr kai faebriel has caused me brainrot

THE BRAINROT SPREADS

i feel like before her games and during them niki is running on pure survival mode....she works better in communities but I think part of her would be so cautious in the arena because she knows only one of them can make it out of the arena and she has wilbur counting on her, it has to be her, and the idea of betraying her allies so violently turns her stomach a little too much to be making any inspiring speeches.

after, though.....

okay it's difficult. because she is so closely monitored by the capitol, there is very little she can do - they can go back to her district and find her friends, wilbur is still in their clutches, even she and jack are not really safe themselves. and also i think something that people kind of overlook with niki (myself included) is that like... during the manberg era in canon she despises schlatt, don't get me wrong, but in the early days she is scared of him. she reacts fearfully when she sees he's online and she tries to avoid him at all costs. she'll spit in his face when she actually has to speak with him, she puts on a brave face, but that doesn't mean she's not scared. (also i think this is kind of an overlooked part of her character because we all just remember her being a fucking badass whenever she does interact with him. she's not brave because she's an unfeeling girlboss, she's brave because she's scared and she feels alone and abandoned but she stands up for herself and for l'manberg anyway!!!)

ANYWAY my point is she's still scared when she leaves the area, especially as she starts her victory tour...... she has thousands of capitol eyes on her and it's uncomfortable and she doesn't like becoming a victor and a mentor. they don't have a great reputation in 12. after all, every victor in the capitol is another person who killed 12's children, and that's exactly how she's felt about all but one victor ever since she was old enough to be aware of the games. she knows that's how everyone else in every other district sees her, she knows the capitol is always watching her, and jack reminds her that there's no chance schlatt and his pals in government are happy with the mess she made of the arena, cracking open its fuel to spread the fire. (she wasn't thinking about that at the time, she was just thinking about surviving - but now she's painfully aware of the danger she's put herself and everyone she cares about in. it's uncomfortable to say the least.)

but then. i think bonding with the other victors empowers her. she starts to piece together that even if she feels extremely alone, there are people who feel the exact same way that she does. people who are a little cold to outsiders, but who can be worn down. it starts with people like puffy and sophie, and it spreads from there. not exactly loud speeches, but these brief flashes of empassioned conversation do get to happen, even if they're constrained to hushed whispers and dark closets. sometimes it's not even whispers at all. there are ways to communicate beyond her words, she's learning that now.

i think once district 13 comes in she'd be a real passionate orator. that's when she's the perfect balance of safe and furious to stand atop an upturned crate and start shouting her heart out. it just takes a long time for her to get there.

[mellorphic]

In Defence of c!Niki - a Four Part Analysis of Every Arc

People who didn’t watch C!Niki see, in the fandom, a big sister type character with girlboss energy who wants to kill a child. Niki isn’t that. She has a well-written narrative which focusses a lot on her relationships with others. Here is me breaking it down!

PART ONE: c!Niki’s Early Days

PART TWO: c!Niki’s Rebellion (you are here)

PART THREE: c!Niki’s Disillusionment

PART FOUR: c!Niki’s Healing

Unfortunately Niki’s pov of Election Day is one of the vods we no longer have and I’m devastated because I think it’s so important. When Schlatt was exiling Wilbur and Tommy, Niki was the first one to protest. While everyone else was stunned, making shocked remarks, or joining Schlatt’s side and going to attack Wilbur and Tommy, Niki shouted at him. Others laughed or were just silent. But not Niki. Never Niki.

And this becomes a running theme for her character, the only one willing to stand up against Schlatt out in the open. Of course, Tubbo and Fundy were going against him too, but they did so from the shadows. From the get go, Niki was different. She stood up for her country and remained loyal to it and to Wilbur like she promised she would.

These were her messages to Tubbo while he was taking up the role of Schlatt’s VP. Of course, we know he wasn’t actually on his side, but Niki didn’t know that. He did not answer her first few.

Because of this, Niki felt alone, not knowing who to trust. And this was the first time that had happened to her on this server, because she had always known who was on what side. Suddenly Niki couldn’t rely on her innate empathy anymore, because being kind wasn’t going to bring her friends back, and she couldn’t understand anyone’s motives because everyone was deliberately hiding them. She was desperate for an ally, and this was the first time she didn’t feel at home in L’Manberg.

This is something that needs to be kept in mind, that Niki had been feeling lonely this early on. A lot of people look at her doomsday arc and think it was a sudden change of heart with no build up or reasoning. But the seeds of that breakdown had been planted as early on as Election Day.

Still, she stayed loyal. She kicked up a fuss, refused to do as she was told, knowing the consequences. She refused to tear down the walls. She screamed that Schlatt had no right to do what he was doing. She yelled at Fundy as he tore down her flag. She would later get taxed, imprisoned, and chased down out of the nation. But she didn’t back down regardless.

S: I’m dying of hunger

N: you shouldn’t have betrayed the only baker in this-

S: oh my god, can you be quiet?

Q: Niki! Niki! You know how to bake, would you like to bake for us?

N: Not for you.

<Eret laughs>

N: Not for this government

J: that’s quite the catering gig you’re turning down, but..

Q: yeah- listen! Listen! We are very hungry people, we are very hungry people

N: I hope you starve.

This is a turning point for Niki, as she abandoned her bakery after this. She did not bake again for a very, very long time.

Her only allies were Eret - who couldn’t do much as they weren’t a citizen and many people didn’t trust her. And HBomb - who helped her gather resources for her resistance but ultimately operated in the shadows. It was support, and her gratefulness for those two characters is proven time and time again after this, but it wasn’t that much. And it had little weight compared to all the betrayals she was soon to face.

One of those betrayals was Fundy. Niki would later be told he didn’t mean any of this, but I don’t think she was ever able to get over it. Partly because there were some things he genuinely meant, when he said them.

F: Schlatt has risen on top of everything.

N: he will fall. He-

F: why resist?

N: because he is not the-

<Schlatt joins the game>

N: oh my god..

F: my leader! My leader!

N: I think I need to leave. Because today is tax day and I don’t- I’m not going to pay the taxes.

F: im about to refurnish the flag, Niki!

N: no you will not! Fundy, leave the flag alone, you already destroyed everything! What do you want more?! What do you want more?!

F: what I want? Is total domination

N: i trusted you.. I trusted you, I thought we would bring peace! […] we worked so hard for the independence of this nation, and you just-

F: Oh, independence you keep!

N: theres no independence with a tyrannist!

Niki felt Fundy had lied to her and later said she was glad that Coconut2020 hadn’t won, if this was what Fundy did with power.

Within the same conversation, this.

N: Wilbur is your father!

F: Wilbur ridiculed me. Wilbur patronised me for years.

N: he just wanted to keep you safe!

F: Wilbur.. was a powerless fool.

N: don’t you dare say that!

I hate to be a broken record, but she kept her promise, didn’t she?

Speaking of Wilbur,

W: we’re in too much of a hot position right now to take in everyone from every sort of- like- person we need into our new, sort of, cave.. so you’re gonna have to hold out in Manberg a little bit longer, is that okay?

N: .. of course.. I will. Take- take care, Wil..

W: thank you.

She sat in silence for a few seconds after that. Now, Wilbur was not abandoning Niki here. He was trying to keep himself, Pogtopia, and Niki safe. But what is she supposed to do, after believing he’d get her out of there? Niki had been feeling abandoned and lost and alone and betrayed, the fact that he couldn’t help was rubbing salt in the wound of everything else that had happened in Manberg already.

After, she moved out of Manberg into Tommy’s holiday home where she found Henry.

N: im not gonna be that lonely.. Henry- I will do everything to protect you, okay? We have each other. We’re- I don’t know who is on our side Henry, I don’t know who is on our side right now, but- <laughs as Henry turns> don’t turn away from me! Tommy is fine. Tommy is okay. And you will get back- get back with him. Soon. Very soon. Okay, Henry? <Henry looks around> I know you’re looking for him! I wish I could lead you to him and I wish I could show you, but we have to- we have to stay here for now. We have to stay here for now. You and me. We’re strong, okay? We’re strong.

It’s obvious Niki is trying to reassure herself. She telling this cow everything she desperately needs to hear in that moment. ‘I will do everything to protect you’ is something she wants someone to tell her. And ‘you will get back with him very soon’, which is what she wants to happen. And of course, ‘we’re strong’. It sparked a new hope into her. A new life. She felt safer.

This is when Niki wrote Dear Friend, and if it is wanted I can write a full analysis of that, but the main thing is that it was a cry for help. Niki was beginning to get incredibly burned out being the only one continuing to fight, having no idea what else she could do, and terrified for her life in the place she used to feel safest in. I wish we knew who ‘Dear Friend’ was. If anyone has theories I’d love to hear them.

She was scared, she felt alone. This marked the beginning of Niki’s darkest point in her life, and it marked the beginning of her losing herself.