#i took an advil before i left which i dont do often and it is not doing enough if anything

[felidaefatigue]

i slept Too Good and Normal (ie on my back or stomach for long stretches of time) and now my lower back hurts like a motherfucker ahhhhh

also my tummy is upset

i am being so brave about it

[johnnysnostril]

You’ve Always Been Mine

chapter 20

`jooheon

i stroked nori’s cheek as she mumbled. drunk nori has got to be one of my favorites.

she mumbled on and on about how long it took her to do her makeup, and how frustrating it was to put on lashes.

“you have it easy, cause you’re a boy, ya know?”

her eyes were still closed but for some reason, she felt the need to move her head back and forth- making the washcloth fall, multiple times.

i was now holding it for her.

all i could say was, “mhm” and smile.

after awhile, her mumbling slowed down. she was fighting her sleep, which i found hilarious.

“you d-don’t think i’m pretty?” she slurred.

i shook my head. “no, i think you’re beyond gorgeous.”

nori smacked her lips and huffed.

“why can’t you just say that sometimes? that’s all a girl wants to hear- sheesh.”

she made a sharp turn onto her side and i dropped my head, holding back my laughter as i folded up the small towel.

she definitely wasn’t going to remember this in the morning.

“you’re right, i should tell you more often.” i nodded.

going into the kitchen, i grabbed two advil pills from her cabinet and a bottle of water.

“here. take this.” i said holding out my palm. nori slowly sat up and glanced at the blue gel pills in my hand.

she shook her head and pouted. “too big..”

pushing my hand away, she looked down at her dress.

“oh my god.. i wore this?”

her eyes were wide open now as she pulled on the red fabric. she shook her head, standing to her feet and began to strip, almost taking off her bra.

i quickly placed the pills on the dresser, along with the water and stopped her.

yes, i was dying to see her naked- but, not like this. i knew that if she was in her right mind, she would be mortified at her actions right now.

“i need to change..” she whispered. “i cant sleep like this..”

i nodded and held her hands, kissing her fingers.

“okay, let’s change then.”

i wrapped my arm around her waist as she struggled to balance on her own. reaching out towards her dresser, i pulled out a long shirt for her and began to help her undress.

she kicked the garment off her ankles as it dropped to the floor. i softly smiled as i pulled the shirt over her head, letting her curls fall in her face.

“you’re beautiful, nori.” i said suddenly. it just slipped out without me thinking.

she was pleased with my statement as she shut her eyes and smiled from ear to ear. “see, was that so hard?” she slurred.

after guiding her arms through the holes, she stumbled back into bed and motioned me to join her.

that’s all i wanted- i just didn’t want her to wake up in the morning and freak out.

“im staying. don’t worry, just get some rest okay?” i stroked her hair and tilted my head as i looked down at her.

“please.. don’t leave me again.. you big idiot.” she whispered as she laid back. i warmly smiled and pulled the blanket over her, tucking her in.

sitting down in the white accent chair, that was next to her bed- i watched her sleep, peacefully.

i was happy, that i could be the one who was nursing her tonight. i wouldn’t wanna be anywhere else.

`nori

i hummed as the light from the sun, started to peak through my blinds and shine in my face. it was warm against my skin and it made me toss the blanket off my body. i slowly opened my eyes, realizing i was back in my bedroom.

how did i get here?

i scratched the top of my head and groaned, looking to the left of me and spotting jooheon. he was slumped in my chair, with his head tilted to the side as he slept.

i stared at him for a moment, having small flashbacks of last night. i was disappointed in myself. i drank two bottles of wine on my own, and jooheon saw me drunk.

i rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and silently yawned as i crawled out of bed. looking down, i noticed i didn’t have any pants on. as i turned to go into my closet, jooheon opened his eyes. there was a slight smile on his face as i gripped the bottom of my shirt, pulling it down a little.

“good morning.” he whispered.

“morning..” i said embarrassed. my eyes shifted to the floor as he stood up and stretched.

“how are you feeling?” he asked. “hung over?”

i nodded, shutting my eyes. i hated being hung over. it was the worse feeling in the world.

jooheon slowly strolled over to me, wrapping his arms around my body. i immediately felt so safe, it made me want to cry. i stood with my arms at my side and just shut my eyes.

“i forgot how good it felt to hold you..” he mumbled.

i furrowed my brows, holding back my tears as i wrapped my arms around his waist- relaxing more into his touch. he rubbed my back soothingly and kissed the top of my head.

“by chance, do you remember anything for last night?”

his heart beat began to race and i looked up at him, with sad eyes. i nodded.

i remembered everything. every last word.

he flashed his dimples and pushed my hair back with his fingers. “i cant be away from you anymore.” jooheon’s eyes went straight to my lips then back to meet my gaze. “i just want us to work.”

i was falling in love with this man, all over again. i was wrapped around his finger and, i’m pretty sure he was wrapped around mine.

i nodded once again, agreeing with him.

“i miss you..” he said stroking my cheek.

i missed him too, like crazy. but, i was scared- now more than ever.

he breathed a laugh and tilted his head. “say something.” his smile faded a bit as we stared back at each other.

“i just-“ i mumbled, pulling away from him. “i’m scared..”

`jooheon

i watched as nori made her way back to the bed and sat down. her gaze was fixed on her fingers as she picked at her nail polish. sighing, i took place in front of her, kneeling down in between her legs.

“thats my fault. i know.”

i guess you could say, i was trying to win her over- with the look on my face. i pressed my lips together, forming a line to make my dimples pop out. i knew that was her weakness.

sliding my palms over her thighs, i gently squeezed them.

“let me fix this. i’ll make it up to you.” i whispered. “we can start all over, from the beginning.”

i smiled to myself as i looked down, noticing goosebumps over her skin.

“to show you that im serious- i’ll call off the project with seulgi.”

her eyes shot up.

“what?..” she said confused.

i paused for a moment. i really wanted to soak up the look on her face. it was as if, i took her favorite candy- straight out of her mouth and placed it into mine.

“i dont want her to come between us again. i’d rather spend all my time, working on us- than on some stupid ep.” i breathed a slight laugh as i traced a heart into her skin. “i just really miss the way we used to be and i’d do anything to get it back.”

meeting her gaze, i noticed her eyes were starting to water. nori’s lip quivered a little as she slowly slipped her fingers underneath my hand- lacing them together.

“you’d really do that..?” she muttered.

“absolutely.” i answered back without hesitation. “i’d give up my fucking career for you- for us.”

in all honesty, i would. i love what i do, but i love nori more.

“i wouldn’t let you do that, jooheon. i couldnt.. you’ve worked way too hard for this- just to throw it away from someone like me..”

“im serious though.” i said standing up and pulling her with me. “i’d do anything to get us back on track. i miss us..”

nori nodded and slowly raised her hand to caress my cheek. 

“just give me some time. why dont we start off with a breakfast date?” she whispered.

i nodded and tilted my head to kiss her wrist. 

`misun

tapping my nails against the table, i looked down at the envelope that was given to me. i still hadn’t opened it- for one reason. i was terrified about what was inside. my mind raced with the many options. what if this was a pay out? what if his manager wanted me to leave him, and inside was a plane ticket back to the states.

the dorm was quiet and it felt weird to be awake, without shownu. i just didn’t wanna wake him. he looked so tired and i didn’t want him to be cranky.

my eyes shot up as i heard a door opened. to my surprise, it was minhyuk who rounded the corner. 

he smiled as he removed his toothbrush out of his mouth.

“hey, good morning. how’d you sleep?” he chuckled.

“morning.” i said in a shy tone. “i slept okay.”

“hm- im surprised you could even sleep at all, with all the snoring shownu hyung does.”

he casually leaned against the wall, flashing a flirtatious smile. 

“whats that?” he said nodding towards the envelope.

i was stuck for a moment as i stared at him. this is the longest conversation that we ever had- i almost couldn’t process the fact that he was still standing in front of me.

“um.. i dont know. i haven’t opened it yet.” 

i blinked a few times, thinking my mind was playing a trick on me. but, this was real.

minhyuk tilted his head and smiled widely.

“something in your eye?” 

strolling towards me, he tucked some hair behind my ear before placing his fingertip between my eyelashes and softly blowing.

i squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head. 

“better?” he laughed. minhyuk’s eyes searched for mine as i glanced off to the side, noticing shownu standing in the door way. his arms were folded as he watched us.

i gasped and created distance between minhyuk and i.

“shownu, you’re awake.” i said smiling and running over to him. i quickly wrapped my arms around him, resting my head on his chest. i shut my eyes, trying to forgot about the thought of minhyuk flirting with me. maybe i was reading into it and he was just being nice.

once i felt shownu’s arm wrap around me, i opened my eyes.

“oh, hey hyung. morning.” minhyuk casually waved then made his way back to the bathroom.

“im hungry- can we go eat?” i said changing the subject quickly- looking up at him. 

shownu’s eyes were glued on minhyuk as he walked away. i could tell that he didn’t like the stunt that his member just pulled.

“yeah.” he announced plainly as he pushed me back into his bedroom. closing the door, his facial expression changed very quickly. 

“did he try to kiss you?” shownu blurted out, angrily.

i laughed at his question. “are you serious?” i shook my head as i grabbed my overnight bag off the floor and started rustling through it. pulling out my clothes, i turned to face him and sighed.

he clenched his jaw, flexing the muscles in his cheek as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“forget it.” he said rolling his eyes.

shownu exited the bedroom, nearly taking the door off the hinges as he slammed it behind him.

`nori

i took one last look in the mirror as i tossed my curls off my shoulder. releasing a soft sign, i made my way out to the living room- where jooheon was waiting.

nori’s outfit

“you look amazing.” he said. his smile was soft, which made my heart skip a few beats.

“thank you..” i voiced.

it was almost like we were really starting over. like when we first met.

jooheon reached out for my hand and i gently laced our fingers. 

“i’ll have to stop at the dorm to change, if that’s okay?”

i nodded and lead him out of the apartment, locking the door.

“how are we going to do this?” i asked a little afraid.

as i turned to face him, he cupped my chin and looked into my eyes.

“you’ll be safe. dont worry.” 

as we arrived at the dorm, i saw misun sitting on the couch by herself. as soon as our eyes met, she jumped to her feet and ran to me- giving me a hug. i laughed as she almost knocked me over.

“hi!” i said squeezing her. “you look so cute.”

misun’s outfit

“are you and shownu going out for breakfast too?” i asked. she nodded. i knew something was up with her as the expression on her face changed.

`shownu

i sat on the edge of the tub with my eyes shut. i really couldn’t explain how i was feeling. it was hard to communicate with misun sometimes because, i didnt want to upset her. i just wanted her to be happy all the time. but, what i saw was just not okay. why was minhyuk so close to her like that? had they kissed before i walked into the room? now that i think about it, she was really jumpy as soon as she seen me.

“hey hyung.” jooheon said as he entered the bathroom. “what are you doing?”

he slightly laughed as he grabbed his toothbrush and began to brush his teeth.

“nori and i are going out to breakfast, if you wanna join us.” he mumbled.

i nodded my head slowly.

oh yeah, we were going. i needed to get her away from minhyuk.

after getting ready, i text our manager and let him know the plans.

shownu’s outfit

jooheon’s outfit

arriving at the restaurant, we were lead straight to the top floor for privacy.

it was nice and quiet up here, perfect for addressing the situation with minhyuk.

catching up to misun, i gently grabbed her arm- pulling her back a little. 

“you’re just going to ignore me for the rest of the day?” 

she snatched her arm back and huffed. 

“after you accused me of cheating with your band member? absolutely.”

“i just asked a simple question and you couldn’t even give me an answer.”

i kept my voice to a whisper so jooheon and nori didn’t hear our conversation.

“a ridiculous question at that.” she rolled her eyes. “you really think i would kiss minhyuk while you were in the room, just a few feet away? how stupid do you think i am?”

“i dont think you’re stupid, misun.”

she breathed a laugh then folded her arms.

“im going to ask you again, and this time i want an answer.”

i was getting angry now. i felt like she thought this was a joke. like my feelings were funny to her.

“did you kiss minhyuk?” i asked once more.

her lips were curved into a slight smile as she looked up at me. she took one step closer as she parted her lips to speak.

“even if i tell you no, you still wont believe me, and that’s the issue. if you think i would really step out of this relationship, maybe we dont need to continue to be in one.”