kinoderyaoi

[beedreamscape]

This one's going on the first page of the People's Paper...

[samanthasroberts]

‘Vanderpump Rules’ Recap: I Have No Recollection

Last week on we found out that Jax probably cheated on Brittany more than once, and nobody was surprised. Also let me just say, fuck Bravo for doing this shit to me on New Year’s Day, aka national hangover day. And by “doing this shit to me,” I mean “airing their regularly scheduled programming.” My hangover is not prepared for this. Then again, my shame hangover is setting in, so maybe some good old-fashioned judging people who are stupider and richer than me might do me some good.

We open at Brittany’s apartment, where all the girls slept. Stassi ordering Taco Bell and drinking a beer first thing in the morning is very relatable and definitely not at all how I started the new year (*whispers to self* think they bought it?). Scheana is taking a private jet to Vegas with Lala and her sugar daddy boyfriend.

The Toms go to Villa Rosa to talk to Lisa about the restaurant. Lisa is lounging on her roof with her dogs and can’t be bothered—how I aspire to handle all my future business deals. Lisa says to Ken that she’s “ready to call it quits,” which is definitely not at all just a fabricated angle by the producers to make us give a shit about this restaurant. Honestly, this shit is annoying. This fake back-and-forth doesn’t make me care any more about Tom Tom. Just saying. 

Bravo is really doing the most with these flashbacks and the slow-mo sequence of Tom and Tom walking up to Lisa’s door. This isn’t ; we don’t need any flashy effects. Just give us the drama straight-up.

Lisa wants Tom and Tom to pay $120,000 for a 10% stake in the company, which IMO seems a little unfair. Like, Lisa employs these people. She knows how much they make. Specifically, she OF ALL PEOPLE should know that these barely employed bartenders don’t have 120 grand.

Lisa is like, “This is the deal, I’m not negotiating” but she also said to the camera that she just pulled that figure out of her ass. So… ?? Actual picture of Lisa Vanderpump:

They settle on 50 grand each for a 5% stake. I’m no Mark Cuban (I do watch a lot of though), but that doesn’t seem like the best deal. Like, can you really call yourself a business owner when you own 5% in said business?

Lisa: All I’m asking for is enthusiasm and positivity.

…Yeah, and 50 thousand dollars they probably don’t have. 

Jax comes home when all the girls are face-first in Taco Bell, yelling and screaming that Brittany is being dramatic. He’s like “People are dying of cancer everyday, this is not a big deal.” Or in other words:

Well given that Jax’s dad just died of cancer, that’s very dark. (May he rest in peace.) So then Brittany…goes over and starts hitting him and pushes him out the door, basically. Yep. Ten minutes into the episode and we’re already witnessing physical assault. Cool. But like, I’m so glad Jax and Brittany were able to work out their problems and stay together in this very healthy and functional relationship.

Jax says to Brittany, “Everything was fine until you started talking to your friends about it,” aka, “Everything was fine until you went to that damn party and your friends went and talked some sense into you.”

I know, right? Isn’t it such a drag when women form their own opinions and stand up for themselves? Can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em, amiright?

Sandoval calls Ariana to tell her the good news about them being partners with Lisa, and her response is basically “k”.

Stassi is talking to Katie about planning Guillermo’s party and she literally said “I didn’t know I was OCD.” So you like, make one to-do list and think you have OCD? Girl, bye.

Scheana’s packing for her trip to Vegas, and her closet looks like the fucking Piper Lime accessory wall on .

All the girls are like “violence is wrong but Brittany you’re doing amazing sweetie by hitting Jax.” I have no further comment at this time.

Lala comes over to Scheana’s, where Ariana is also hanging out (sitting on like, the floor of Scheana’s closet because reasons) and is talking about how well-off her married boyfriend is. Can you really make that much money from a mid-level film you produced like, three years ago? Seriously, look at this guy’s IMDB. He’s done, like, three movies. If you can get private jet money off of three movies nobody’s ever heard of, I’m packing my bags and going to film school.

Anyway, apparently Katie talked shit about Lala’s married boyfriend, and by that I mean Katie merely stated that Lala is dating someone who, at the time, was very much in the eyes of the law still married. Which, according to my research, is true. Or at least, it was at the time of filming. Separated =/= divorced—a lesson for all you kids at home.

Lala: Are you gonna mention my man again? Are you tryna get popped?

Ugh, Lala, take off your Compton beanie. You are a white girl from Utah. Stop. Lala is every white girl who sees once.

Lala calling her boyfriend “very much not married” is very much fake news. The divorce was only finalized like, last week. We all have the receipts.

Ok so Lala tells Ariana and Scheana that Schwartz supposedly made out with Lala’s friend Allie. Tbh I’m probably going to stalk Lala’s Instagram to figure out who she is. Stay tuned for that follow-up article. Also I’d just like to say, fuck Lala for being like “If you come for my man I’m gonna come for your marriage.” That gives us two scenarios: Either Lala is making this up as retaliation because she’s salty, or she was going to sit on this information until Katie pissed her off. Both are bad, especially if you claim to be friends with Katie.

I’m not really going to entertain the “Stassi planning Guillermo’s party” storyline because it’s obvious that she doesn’t really have anything to do with it. You can’t plan an event with two days’ notice; it’s literally impossible. This event has ben planned for months, I’m not stupid.

Jax and Schwartz are at some restaurant that serves fried guacamole, and I need to know the name of this restaurant immediately.

Jax tells Schwartz that he’s not going to show up to Guillermo’s party, which means he’s definitely going to show up to Guillermo’s party. Schwartz brings up the possibility of having an open relationship, and like, FINALLY somebody brought it up.

Jax is like “I don’t want that.” Jax. Jax. JAX. You want the emotional benefits of a relationship, but you are incapable of being monogamous. I feel like an open relationship is exactly what you want. Know yourself.

Stassi is freaking out about running a couple of errands, like picking up a cake and flowers before 5pm. Yeah I guess having a real job for 35 seconds might be kind of hard.

Stassi has a bar mitzvah sign-in book at this grown-ass man’s birthday party. Shit, maybe I should get into event planning.

Kristen is at this party for reasons unknown and wastes no time bringing up to Brittany how shitty Jax is. Don’t you have your own relationship to worry about? Why is she so invested in Jax’s relationship? Theory: Kristen is in love with Jax. More on this at 7.

James and Jax are drinking together, which is something I never thought I’d see. They’re doing shots of absinthe—how all responsible nights start out.

Ariana goes to Schwartz like “Can I steal you for a sec?” Sorry, can you tell I’d rather be watching rn?

Ariana is like “Soooo I heard you drunkenly made out with somebody in January/February.” But she’s ALSO like “But don’t tell Katie about this now, wait until you’re home.” So why even bring it up at this party? I know, too much logic.

Schwartz is like, “January or February? What is the meaning of those words?” So Schwartz’s immediate excuse is “IDK I don’t remember.” In other words, “Yeah I definitely did that.” Or in other words:

Meanwhile James and Jax are me and all my coworkers, getting wasted and taking selfies.

James: Absinthe tastes like a little green fairy that goes down your throat and rips your balls out your throat.

That’s not a taste, but ok. I really love this montage of their drunken babbling and I could watch an hour of James playing “got your nose” with Jax.

Jax is talking to James about his and Brittany’s sex life (again, things I never thought I’d see) and he’s like “she’s hate-fucking me.” Jax is explaining the Madonna/Whore complex. Wowowowow this is really advanced shit for Jax. I’m, dare I say, impressed. New year, new Jax?

Schwartz decides to tell Katie that he cheated on her in the middle of a crowded party. Fuck Schwartz. You don’t do this. I hated Katie last season, but damn. Nobody deserves to be publicly humiliated like that.

If I had a nickel for every time Schwartz said, “I have zero recollection of this” I could pay off my New Year’s Eve Uber. Also, what a weak excuse. You’re not even gonna deny you cheated? You’re just like, “Yea I probably did that, shrug life.”

Katie doesn’t even really seem that upset. She’s like “What did I do? Is this some kind of karmic punishment?” Not really, you just married the wrong person.

And what does Schwartz say? “Bubba, I have no recollection of this.” Contrary to what I tell myself when I’m hungover, even if you don’t remember something, that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. However, I may start using this anyway.

Source: http://allofbeer.com/vanderpump-rules-recap-i-have-no-recollection/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2019/01/11/vanderpump-rules-recap-i-have-no-recollection/

[adambstingus]

‘Vanderpump Rules’ Recap: I Have No Recollection

Last week on we found out that Jax probably cheated on Brittany more than once, and nobody was surprised. Also let me just say, fuck Bravo for doing this shit to me on New Year’s Day, aka national hangover day. And by “doing this shit to me,” I mean “airing their regularly scheduled programming.” My hangover is not prepared for this. Then again, my shame hangover is setting in, so maybe some good old-fashioned judging people who are stupider and richer than me might do me some good.

We open at Brittany’s apartment, where all the girls slept. Stassi ordering Taco Bell and drinking a beer first thing in the morning is very relatable and definitely not at all how I started the new year (*whispers to self* think they bought it?). Scheana is taking a private jet to Vegas with Lala and her sugar daddy boyfriend.

The Toms go to Villa Rosa to talk to Lisa about the restaurant. Lisa is lounging on her roof with her dogs and can’t be bothered—how I aspire to handle all my future business deals. Lisa says to Ken that she’s “ready to call it quits,” which is definitely not at all just a fabricated angle by the producers to make us give a shit about this restaurant. Honestly, this shit is annoying. This fake back-and-forth doesn’t make me care any more about Tom Tom. Just saying. 

Bravo is really doing the most with these flashbacks and the slow-mo sequence of Tom and Tom walking up to Lisa’s door. This isn’t ; we don’t need any flashy effects. Just give us the drama straight-up.

Lisa wants Tom and Tom to pay $120,000 for a 10% stake in the company, which IMO seems a little unfair. Like, Lisa employs these people. She knows how much they make. Specifically, she OF ALL PEOPLE should know that these barely employed bartenders don’t have 120 grand.

Lisa is like, “This is the deal, I’m not negotiating” but she also said to the camera that she just pulled that figure out of her ass. So… ?? Actual picture of Lisa Vanderpump:

They settle on 50 grand each for a 5% stake. I’m no Mark Cuban (I do watch a lot of though), but that doesn’t seem like the best deal. Like, can you really call yourself a business owner when you own 5% in said business?

Lisa: All I’m asking for is enthusiasm and positivity.

…Yeah, and 50 thousand dollars they probably don’t have. 

Jax comes home when all the girls are face-first in Taco Bell, yelling and screaming that Brittany is being dramatic. He’s like “People are dying of cancer everyday, this is not a big deal.” Or in other words:

Well given that Jax’s dad just died of cancer, that’s very dark. (May he rest in peace.) So then Brittany…goes over and starts hitting him and pushes him out the door, basically. Yep. Ten minutes into the episode and we’re already witnessing physical assault. Cool. But like, I’m so glad Jax and Brittany were able to work out their problems and stay together in this very healthy and functional relationship.

Jax says to Brittany, “Everything was fine until you started talking to your friends about it,” aka, “Everything was fine until you went to that damn party and your friends went and talked some sense into you.”

I know, right? Isn’t it such a drag when women form their own opinions and stand up for themselves? Can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em, amiright?

Sandoval calls Ariana to tell her the good news about them being partners with Lisa, and her response is basically “k”.

Stassi is talking to Katie about planning Guillermo’s party and she literally said “I didn’t know I was OCD.” So you like, make one to-do list and think you have OCD? Girl, bye.

Scheana’s packing for her trip to Vegas, and her closet looks like the fucking Piper Lime accessory wall on .

All the girls are like “violence is wrong but Brittany you’re doing amazing sweetie by hitting Jax.” I have no further comment at this time.

Lala comes over to Scheana’s, where Ariana is also hanging out (sitting on like, the floor of Scheana’s closet because reasons) and is talking about how well-off her married boyfriend is. Can you really make that much money from a mid-level film you produced like, three years ago? Seriously, look at this guy’s IMDB. He’s done, like, three movies. If you can get private jet money off of three movies nobody’s ever heard of, I’m packing my bags and going to film school.

Anyway, apparently Katie talked shit about Lala’s married boyfriend, and by that I mean Katie merely stated that Lala is dating someone who, at the time, was very much in the eyes of the law still married. Which, according to my research, is true. Or at least, it was at the time of filming. Separated =/= divorced—a lesson for all you kids at home.

Lala: Are you gonna mention my man again? Are you tryna get popped?

Ugh, Lala, take off your Compton beanie. You are a white girl from Utah. Stop. Lala is every white girl who sees once.

Lala calling her boyfriend “very much not married” is very much fake news. The divorce was only finalized like, last week. We all have the receipts.

Ok so Lala tells Ariana and Scheana that Schwartz supposedly made out with Lala’s friend Allie. Tbh I’m probably going to stalk Lala’s Instagram to figure out who she is. Stay tuned for that follow-up article. Also I’d just like to say, fuck Lala for being like “If you come for my man I’m gonna come for your marriage.” That gives us two scenarios: Either Lala is making this up as retaliation because she’s salty, or she was going to sit on this information until Katie pissed her off. Both are bad, especially if you claim to be friends with Katie.

I’m not really going to entertain the “Stassi planning Guillermo’s party” storyline because it’s obvious that she doesn’t really have anything to do with it. You can’t plan an event with two days’ notice; it’s literally impossible. This event has ben planned for months, I’m not stupid.

Jax and Schwartz are at some restaurant that serves fried guacamole, and I need to know the name of this restaurant immediately.

Jax tells Schwartz that he’s not going to show up to Guillermo’s party, which means he’s definitely going to show up to Guillermo’s party. Schwartz brings up the possibility of having an open relationship, and like, FINALLY somebody brought it up.

Jax is like “I don’t want that.” Jax. Jax. JAX. You want the emotional benefits of a relationship, but you are incapable of being monogamous. I feel like an open relationship is exactly what you want. Know yourself.

Stassi is freaking out about running a couple of errands, like picking up a cake and flowers before 5pm. Yeah I guess having a real job for 35 seconds might be kind of hard.

Stassi has a bar mitzvah sign-in book at this grown-ass man’s birthday party. Shit, maybe I should get into event planning.

Kristen is at this party for reasons unknown and wastes no time bringing up to Brittany how shitty Jax is. Don’t you have your own relationship to worry about? Why is she so invested in Jax’s relationship? Theory: Kristen is in love with Jax. More on this at 7.

James and Jax are drinking together, which is something I never thought I’d see. They’re doing shots of absinthe—how all responsible nights start out.

Ariana goes to Schwartz like “Can I steal you for a sec?” Sorry, can you tell I’d rather be watching rn?

Ariana is like “Soooo I heard you drunkenly made out with somebody in January/February.” But she’s ALSO like “But don’t tell Katie about this now, wait until you’re home.” So why even bring it up at this party? I know, too much logic.

Schwartz is like, “January or February? What is the meaning of those words?” So Schwartz’s immediate excuse is “IDK I don’t remember.” In other words, “Yeah I definitely did that.” Or in other words:

Meanwhile James and Jax are me and all my coworkers, getting wasted and taking selfies.

James: Absinthe tastes like a little green fairy that goes down your throat and rips your balls out your throat.

That’s not a taste, but ok. I really love this montage of their drunken babbling and I could watch an hour of James playing “got your nose” with Jax.

Jax is talking to James about his and Brittany’s sex life (again, things I never thought I’d see) and he’s like “she’s hate-fucking me.” Jax is explaining the Madonna/Whore complex. Wowowowow this is really advanced shit for Jax. I’m, dare I say, impressed. New year, new Jax?

Schwartz decides to tell Katie that he cheated on her in the middle of a crowded party. Fuck Schwartz. You don’t do this. I hated Katie last season, but damn. Nobody deserves to be publicly humiliated like that.

If I had a nickel for every time Schwartz said, “I have zero recollection of this” I could pay off my New Year’s Eve Uber. Also, what a weak excuse. You’re not even gonna deny you cheated? You’re just like, “Yea I probably did that, shrug life.”

Katie doesn’t even really seem that upset. She’s like “What did I do? Is this some kind of karmic punishment?” Not really, you just married the wrong person.

And what does Schwartz say? “Bubba, I have no recollection of this.” Contrary to what I tell myself when I’m hungover, even if you don’t remember something, that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. However, I may start using this anyway.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/vanderpump-rules-recap-i-have-no-recollection/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/181934270367

[allofbeercom]

‘Vanderpump Rules’ Recap: I Have No Recollection

Last week on we found out that Jax probably cheated on Brittany more than once, and nobody was surprised. Also let me just say, fuck Bravo for doing this shit to me on New Year’s Day, aka national hangover day. And by “doing this shit to me,” I mean “airing their regularly scheduled programming.” My hangover is not prepared for this. Then again, my shame hangover is setting in, so maybe some good old-fashioned judging people who are stupider and richer than me might do me some good.

We open at Brittany’s apartment, where all the girls slept. Stassi ordering Taco Bell and drinking a beer first thing in the morning is very relatable and definitely not at all how I started the new year (*whispers to self* think they bought it?). Scheana is taking a private jet to Vegas with Lala and her sugar daddy boyfriend.

The Toms go to Villa Rosa to talk to Lisa about the restaurant. Lisa is lounging on her roof with her dogs and can’t be bothered—how I aspire to handle all my future business deals. Lisa says to Ken that she’s “ready to call it quits,” which is definitely not at all just a fabricated angle by the producers to make us give a shit about this restaurant. Honestly, this shit is annoying. This fake back-and-forth doesn’t make me care any more about Tom Tom. Just saying. 

Bravo is really doing the most with these flashbacks and the slow-mo sequence of Tom and Tom walking up to Lisa’s door. This isn’t ; we don’t need any flashy effects. Just give us the drama straight-up.

Lisa wants Tom and Tom to pay $120,000 for a 10% stake in the company, which IMO seems a little unfair. Like, Lisa employs these people. She knows how much they make. Specifically, she OF ALL PEOPLE should know that these barely employed bartenders don’t have 120 grand.

Lisa is like, “This is the deal, I’m not negotiating” but she also said to the camera that she just pulled that figure out of her ass. So… ?? Actual picture of Lisa Vanderpump:

They settle on 50 grand each for a 5% stake. I’m no Mark Cuban (I do watch a lot of though), but that doesn’t seem like the best deal. Like, can you really call yourself a business owner when you own 5% in said business?

Lisa: All I’m asking for is enthusiasm and positivity.

…Yeah, and 50 thousand dollars they probably don’t have. 

Jax comes home when all the girls are face-first in Taco Bell, yelling and screaming that Brittany is being dramatic. He’s like “People are dying of cancer everyday, this is not a big deal.” Or in other words:

Well given that Jax’s dad just died of cancer, that’s very dark. (May he rest in peace.) So then Brittany…goes over and starts hitting him and pushes him out the door, basically. Yep. Ten minutes into the episode and we’re already witnessing physical assault. Cool. But like, I’m so glad Jax and Brittany were able to work out their problems and stay together in this very healthy and functional relationship.

Jax says to Brittany, “Everything was fine until you started talking to your friends about it,” aka, “Everything was fine until you went to that damn party and your friends went and talked some sense into you.”

I know, right? Isn’t it such a drag when women form their own opinions and stand up for themselves? Can’t live with ’em, can’t live without ’em, amiright?

Sandoval calls Ariana to tell her the good news about them being partners with Lisa, and her response is basically “k”.

Stassi is talking to Katie about planning Guillermo’s party and she literally said “I didn’t know I was OCD.” So you like, make one to-do list and think you have OCD? Girl, bye.

Scheana’s packing for her trip to Vegas, and her closet looks like the fucking Piper Lime accessory wall on .

All the girls are like “violence is wrong but Brittany you’re doing amazing sweetie by hitting Jax.” I have no further comment at this time.

Lala comes over to Scheana’s, where Ariana is also hanging out (sitting on like, the floor of Scheana’s closet because reasons) and is talking about how well-off her married boyfriend is. Can you really make that much money from a mid-level film you produced like, three years ago? Seriously, look at this guy’s IMDB. He’s done, like, three movies. If you can get private jet money off of three movies nobody’s ever heard of, I’m packing my bags and going to film school.

Anyway, apparently Katie talked shit about Lala’s married boyfriend, and by that I mean Katie merely stated that Lala is dating someone who, at the time, was very much in the eyes of the law still married. Which, according to my research, is true. Or at least, it was at the time of filming. Separated =/= divorced—a lesson for all you kids at home.

Lala: Are you gonna mention my man again? Are you tryna get popped?

Ugh, Lala, take off your Compton beanie. You are a white girl from Utah. Stop. Lala is every white girl who sees once.

Lala calling her boyfriend “very much not married” is very much fake news. The divorce was only finalized like, last week. We all have the receipts.

Ok so Lala tells Ariana and Scheana that Schwartz supposedly made out with Lala’s friend Allie. Tbh I’m probably going to stalk Lala’s Instagram to figure out who she is. Stay tuned for that follow-up article. Also I’d just like to say, fuck Lala for being like “If you come for my man I’m gonna come for your marriage.” That gives us two scenarios: Either Lala is making this up as retaliation because she’s salty, or she was going to sit on this information until Katie pissed her off. Both are bad, especially if you claim to be friends with Katie.

I’m not really going to entertain the “Stassi planning Guillermo’s party” storyline because it’s obvious that she doesn’t really have anything to do with it. You can’t plan an event with two days’ notice; it’s literally impossible. This event has ben planned for months, I’m not stupid.

Jax and Schwartz are at some restaurant that serves fried guacamole, and I need to know the name of this restaurant immediately.

Jax tells Schwartz that he’s not going to show up to Guillermo’s party, which means he’s definitely going to show up to Guillermo’s party. Schwartz brings up the possibility of having an open relationship, and like, FINALLY somebody brought it up.

Jax is like “I don’t want that.” Jax. Jax. JAX. You want the emotional benefits of a relationship, but you are incapable of being monogamous. I feel like an open relationship is exactly what you want. Know yourself.

Stassi is freaking out about running a couple of errands, like picking up a cake and flowers before 5pm. Yeah I guess having a real job for 35 seconds might be kind of hard.

Stassi has a bar mitzvah sign-in book at this grown-ass man’s birthday party. Shit, maybe I should get into event planning.

Kristen is at this party for reasons unknown and wastes no time bringing up to Brittany how shitty Jax is. Don’t you have your own relationship to worry about? Why is she so invested in Jax’s relationship? Theory: Kristen is in love with Jax. More on this at 7.

James and Jax are drinking together, which is something I never thought I’d see. They’re doing shots of absinthe—how all responsible nights start out.

Ariana goes to Schwartz like “Can I steal you for a sec?” Sorry, can you tell I’d rather be watching rn?

Ariana is like “Soooo I heard you drunkenly made out with somebody in January/February.” But she’s ALSO like “But don’t tell Katie about this now, wait until you’re home.” So why even bring it up at this party? I know, too much logic.

Schwartz is like, “January or February? What is the meaning of those words?” So Schwartz’s immediate excuse is “IDK I don’t remember.” In other words, “Yeah I definitely did that.” Or in other words:

Meanwhile James and Jax are me and all my coworkers, getting wasted and taking selfies.

James: Absinthe tastes like a little green fairy that goes down your throat and rips your balls out your throat.

That’s not a taste, but ok. I really love this montage of their drunken babbling and I could watch an hour of James playing “got your nose” with Jax.

Jax is talking to James about his and Brittany’s sex life (again, things I never thought I’d see) and he’s like “she’s hate-fucking me.” Jax is explaining the Madonna/Whore complex. Wowowowow this is really advanced shit for Jax. I’m, dare I say, impressed. New year, new Jax?

Schwartz decides to tell Katie that he cheated on her in the middle of a crowded party. Fuck Schwartz. You don’t do this. I hated Katie last season, but damn. Nobody deserves to be publicly humiliated like that.

If I had a nickel for every time Schwartz said, “I have zero recollection of this” I could pay off my New Year’s Eve Uber. Also, what a weak excuse. You’re not even gonna deny you cheated? You’re just like, “Yea I probably did that, shrug life.”

Katie doesn’t even really seem that upset. She’s like “What did I do? Is this some kind of karmic punishment?” Not really, you just married the wrong person.

And what does Schwartz say? “Bubba, I have no recollection of this.” Contrary to what I tell myself when I’m hungover, even if you don’t remember something, that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. However, I may start using this anyway.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/vanderpump-rules-recap-i-have-no-recollection/

[rachelzee143-blog]

Another Mother Against Promposals

<p>My stance on the issue of the Promposal trend was recently placed in public view when I read this blog post here: http://www.scarymommy.com/promposal-trend/</p> <p>A friend of mine, a millennial who is smart, outspoken and whom I hold in high regard responded by saying this: <blockquote>Hi I’m 22 this is sounds EXACTLY LIKE LITERALLY EVERY article by a bitter out of touch middle aged person ever. Seriously the world we’re growing up in is screwed the public education system is a shit show they deserve the whatever celebration they want for simply surviving cyber bullying, hormones, growing up, common core and deciding what to do with their lives before their brains are even done developing. You can’t make enough money working part time to put yourself through college (I would know I’m trying!) so they might not even get to finish. No degree? good luck making enough to get married or start a family, look at the people a few years older than high school seniors, millennials, people this woman’s age can’t fucking shut up about how we’re ruining everything by not getting married, buying houses and starting families AND WHY do they think we’re not doing these things?? Because we’re selfish and only want to be “free and focus on our selfies, avocado toast and careers” when the reality is we can’t afford to marry the people we love without coming under criticism for not having a dress or a church, we can barely afford the shoeboxes we do live in so a house might as well be a mermaid and if we kids living the way we do we’d never hear the end of how awful we are pawning them off on our parents because we can’t afford daycare and rent. Let these kids party as extravagantly as they please because it may be a long time before they ever seen the rest of those mile stones.“

My response? I read the article twice before posting. I have a general rule against posting propaganda that perpetuates generational divide. Because the truth is, when I was 22, it sucked just as much. For different reasons, but it sucked. When I was 22, we had new frontiers to handle. We were not certain this planet would be around long enough for us to see our own children. Would it be nuclear war? The hole in the ozone? Pollution? Many of our parents got divorced when we were young, giving way to the term "broken homes”. Ours was the first generation to have predominantly two parents working full time. We were called the latch key generation; later the more ubiquitous Generation X. We witnessed the AIDS epidemic first hand and a government try to ignore and scapegoat it away. Trust me: we had plenty on our shoulders and I remember. At 22 I had to drop out of college (lack of finances and inability to pay back loans.) I worked two full time and one part time jobs plus babysitting and lived with my parents for the next few years. When my husband and I finally got married we had been together for six years. He received some money from his grandmother to put a down payment on our house - a double, so we always have income from the upper. At a time when weddings were expected to cost 15-30k, ours cost about 6k. My mother hand sewed my dress. We got an amazing deal on tulle and other decorations from a florist that happened to be closing. We made it work. So when people lament about how great it was “back in my day”, I hesitate to get on board with that. We had the same criticisms of “kids don’t play outside” and “none of the parents understand the way their children are being taught.” We felt misunderstood by the Boomers and the Silent Gen'ers who raised us. And they felt misunderstood by the Greatest Gen'ers before them, and so forth. The struggles that occur as part of a coming of age may be painted with different medium, but they are all the same. And I don’t want to pretend that somehow my people got it all sunshine and rainbows right just because we brought the world Google and our mothers could yell for us from five blocks away to get us home in time for dinner. But this prom thing… my God, the pressure! I went to three proms (mom made those dresses too.) For the first two, I asked my dates to go with me. None of the guys I asked were even in my grade. I am quite certain nobody wanted to take a chubby weirdo like me. I cannot for the life of me imagine if the expectation had been a promposal that for me would simply never have come. The humiliation would have been crushing. Seeing others in my not quite fully developed but highly perceptive mind experience this might literally have killed me. But I did go, with nice boys who were my friends. One of which I felt compelled to bribe by buying his ticket and arranging for him to wear my brother’s vintage tuxedo. My mom tailored it for him and made him a tie and cummerbund to match my dress. (And I was rejected by the first guy I asked for that year.) [The third prom was my boyfriend’s senior prom. He actually asked me. I was in college. I married that guy.] And even then, I remember parents complaining about the unnecessary extravagance of it all - the limos, kids renting hotels… my junior prom date wore his nicest suit (not a tux) and our parents drove. For my senior prom, my dad borrowed a friend’s large van and took us to our restaurant and then to the prom. [My future husband has his own car]. I think my point is… I don’t want to take anything away from the experiences of the people who come after me. But at the same time, there is elegance in simplicity - which often gets overlooked in our youth and only more so when parents encourage it. I don’t want to take away anyone’s opportunity to celebrate and live it up. It’s just that when I look at these things, I wonder why this has to be SO big? It felt enormous when I lived it and it wasn’t this big. The expectations become even more difficult to meet. Seems like so much pressure to create a massive set up for potential disaster.

<p>Later, I spoke with my oldest daughter about this phenomenon. She is an incredible romantic who swoons at rom-coms and spent much of her earliest years enacting weddings with Barbie dolls and such. She is fourteen now and even though she is pretty certain all boys her own age are immature and gross, there is certainly a part of her that yearns for the summery sweetness of a fumbling slow dance on a dark and starry gymnasium floor, or a hand to hold while strolling through a carnival.

To no surprise, she said that these are “so cute” and “sweet”. And I get that. Some of these kids really come up with unique and fun ways to get the date.

But as the article says, when is enough enough? As a Gen-Xer myself, I tend to revolt against the mentality that somehow other generations (before or after) are wrong, or had it easier or whatever. We have all sailed uncharted waters. We have all taken risks by ignoring the warnings of our predecessors, and benefitted from them as well as failed. We have traded things along the way that have both helped and hindered our worlds equally. I believe this to be one universal truth of the whole human existence. Gen-Exers were once classified as cynical if not ambivalent, helpless, hapless and hopeless, in some ways eternal seekers - though that was not a compliment at the time. So by no means am I into speaking out against a generation. That’s just mean. <p>What I see is the nefarious underbelly of teenage expectation. For example: what if the askee still says no? What if the askee is asked by more than one person? What if the askee thinks the asker has bigger feelings than they do? What if the asker has bigger expectations in mind, since they went though all the trouble? </p> See, those problems have been there all along in the history of proms, and yet somehow the Promposal seems to amplify the stakes even more.