#i was supposed to see a tinder date yesterday but i was kinda distraught or whatever so i cancelled w them and i feel guilty about it but
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#broke up w my gf last night#it was a long time coming but obv i still cried about it#were still friends but i might not talk to her for a min#i basically told her i miss when we were just friends and it felt like she actively wanted to talk to me instead of feeling like she was#forced to. well not really it was more simple than that but whatever#ugh. im really tired and a little hungover and UGH#i was supposed to see a tinder date yesterday but i was kinda distraught or whatever so i cancelled w them and i feel guilty about it but#for lack of better words my appetite is literally ruined. i domt wanna speak to anyone in any sorta romantic light at all rn and i dont#sleep w ppl i dont really know or am not friends or partners with#we were non monogamous btw so i wasnt planning on cheating on her or anything.#UGH. i KNEW this was coming and it literally STILL hurts but now i can continue to heal now that its over and im glad for that#i couldnt keep lying to myself and thinking i could fix us when it was hurting me so much and everyday i would have a dream about her and#then wake up and literally be sad and bummed out and aggravated allllllll day#bro not to fish but if anybody wants to be nice to me rn i could sure use it akdbshjdks#and now i REALLY dont wanna go on tgat date! and they are so so sweet and weve been talking a lot leading up to this and i dont want them to#think i was leading them on ? but i also for my sake and theirs dont wanna dhow up and just be sad and uninterested! because ive been on the#other side of that date and it fuckign feels bad!!!!#and not to mention the RSD from my adhd ive literally been repeating#its nothing i did she doesnt hate me i didnt ruin anything its nothing i did#over and over#im glad that i did what i did :(( BUT IM SAD FUCK AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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