#i will glue you together with bricks and popsicle sticks i swear

[yyhfanfiction]

I had to block all the character blogs for this fandom, they're all acephobic and it breaks my heart. 💔 This fandom was my safe haven and now it feels like a lie. Idk I'm deeply hurt and just wanted to come to the best yyh tumblr there is. Thank you for listening ❤

[For reference: original post is here - https://yusukeurameshi-ask.tumblr.com/post/174274818838/damn-it-you-rp-blogs-are-pissing-me-off-with-how]

Anon, I’m really, really sorry to hear that you’re feelingthis way. I’m taking a little bit of time to respond because I want to be fairto your feelings, the anon who sent in the original ask you mentioned (as I don’tknow if you’re the same person), the ask blogs, and the community as a whole(ace and YYH). We are a beautiful community that I want to see thrive. Thatcohesion is truly indispensable to me, which is why I’ve taken the time toconstruct this response in what is hopefully a respectful, comprehensive manner.I will also say that I am woefully ignorant when it comes to complex dynamicsof asexuality. I’ve read many interpretations of it and don’t actually know acredible source that makes anyone more correct than the other. After as muchreview as I can arm myself for a response, let’s break this down a bit into parts.

So first, I have been incredibly absent from tumblr as awhole. I’ve heard bits and pieces lately of new ask blogs and I am so excitedto see this in the fandom. I want to keep this momentum up, because I feel thatwe’ve been in a lull (again, not through my own view, but generallyunderstanding more of the longer-standing blogs have been quiet lately). I amstoked to know people are reinvigorating the fandom. That being said, Ireceived this anon ask above this morning and decided to further investigatewhat was going on to grasp the context. After asking around a bit, a friendsent me a link to the above post from a reblog on another ask blog.

There are several things that seem to be going on here –first being the ask was sent in a very tonal manner. Building upon this, theresponse is set in the same tone, paired with the fact that it seems to also bein-character for the ask blog (it is supposed to be sent to Yusuke, after all).However, I would like to cut in right here and mention that two negativelycharged responses do not make a right. I want that to be very clear. This wasfurther snowballed by the other ask blog’s response, also technically in-character.

That being said, I think that there is still the likelihoodthese ask blogs are not intentionally being insensitive. Where I do draw aline, is the snowflake comment buried in the notes. This is my own personal gripe that snowflake issuch a poor thing to call people and undermines most issues people have atheart, projecting or not. It can further domino others’ responses to completelyundermine the original point as well. Choosing sides and calling others namesis not productive. That being said, getting over tonality like this is noteasy. However, I expect better from both ends in this community. I know you arecapable. If you care that someone is doing something that offends you and you trulywish to talk through the behavior, approach it in a more dignified manner. Phrasingthings more as a question (e.g., I see you’re using this definition like X, buthave you considered how it is sometimes used as Y? I want to have an openconversation to understand why you’re coming at this from Z angle.) can be abetter opener. Even disclaiming you are trying to approach it with an openmind, as mentioned in the example, can clear a bit of space to go forward inthe conversation. If you come at something in a charged manner and find youregret said action, apologize. You will find that more often than not, theother party should be somewhat amenable. This is not particularly directed at oneside, but a good general point to consider for anyone.

Where I would really, really like to go from here is alearning perspective. I see a great deal of divergence in the definition ofasexual (e.g., there is a biological definition that actually does fit canonYukina – that is, she can reproduce without a partner). Once you delve intowhat I am currently categorizing as sexual orientation (or lack thereof), itgets a bit muddy. Even after reviewing just this Wikipedia article to scratch thesurface, there are many, many subfacets, some which contradict. This is notuncommon in complex social constructs. It’s actually not uncommon in mostscientific or specific-speech attempting to clearly define and categorizethings.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asexuality

So, what I would love to encourage is a more open mind,anon. If you find you cannot continue to support these ask blogs, that is obviouslyyour own prerogative that you are justified in having. Furthermore, I encourageyou to calmly approach anyone that you find does the ace community adisservice, intentional or not. But, I truly encourage you to try to do so in amanner that will be well-received. I do not know if you are the same personthat asked the Yusuke blog or just another person that saw it and was as sad asI am about how it all unfolded.

It is so easy to call people names, take the simple route,and judge. This response alone took me a few hours to construct to what I believeto be an acceptable level and receive feedback where I might be miss-steppingor misinterpreting. That is incredibly useful to have when you are trying toconvey complicated matters.

We are all human, we have flaws, but we need to know how tocommunicate. That is how you stick together. It’s how you thrive as a team. I wantthis so badly for the community as a whole. Please take these points intoconsideration going forward and I openly encourage you to send me more asks(anon or not – it’s all fine) to talk through these points, especially if Ihave somehow misconstrued anything. I want a space where everyone can talkfreely, but also logically. It’s the best way to continue and reinforce thecommunity.

Tagging referenced blogs because I also encourage theirinput, in a calm, civil (including out-of-character) manner. We’re all equalhere. Please correct me if I misrepresented or assumed anything incorrectly. And thanks if you took the time to truly read through this entire beast of a response.

@yusukeurameshi-ask @ask-master-genkai