#idc about my old job it was shit but the fact that i’ll probably never talk to this guy again is sad

[sixpiecechickenmcnobody]

got extremely wine drunk with my ex-coworkers and was freaked about being unemployed and freshly separated but now i have 2 interviews today and 2 wonderful new friends i met at my horrible old job so literally everything will be fine. i will be fine. anyway pic i took while walking home drunk because the Q was a half hour wait

[fizzingwizard]

I wanted to do the Kizuna countdown these guys made but I uh forgot. And I’m gonna forget again before friday because I tend to pass out after work and dinner. Sooo... I’m just gonna do it all right here right now, since it’s the last weekend before Kizuna!

First thoughts when Kizuna was announced:

“Holy shit they’re making another one!? How long will they try to squeeze every drop of nostalgia out of us? Because as for me I’m pretty sure that well is bottomless soooo can they just go on making new Adventure movies forever and ever?”

Expectations for Kizuna:

Based on what I’ve heard it kind of seems like the Digimon sequel we would have expected... but got Tri instead. I really enjoyed Tri, though it was far from perfect, so I’m not sure how to feel about Kizuna! But I’m really excited to see the kids as adults trying to balance adulting, their dreams, and the things they care about in their daily lives.

A headcanon/theory you’d like Kizuna to make canon:

Can’t think of anything, sorry.

Expectations for the new characters:

New girl has a butterfly in her hair. She’s probably a harmless guide/informant type. New guy looks strict and apparently is rather blunt. But my guess is he’s not the big bad either... maybe distrusting of the digital world though. There’s probably more to both of these guys but Idc as usual, I only care about my children.

First Digimon memory:

Was a 10 year old Pokemon fan. All 10 year old Pokemon fans thought Digimon was a rip-off (how were we to know it was actually the older of the two, and already part of an established monster tradition in Japan!). We were also obsessed with Pogs and had fights over Pogs on the playground, which I think says a lot about our mental state.

My bro rented some Digimon VHS from Blockbuster (fuck yeah 1999!) and it was the whole Devimon saga. I scoffed and then sat down and watched with him. Then I was freaking HOOKED. I turned on the TV to see the new eps, but actually the show was starting back at reruns before moving on to the Myotismon saga at the time, so I got to watch the whole thing from start to finish in chronological order. I cried buckets when the final episode aired and mourned for weeks.

Favorite Adventure series:

does this mean Adventure or 02? or including Tri? Anyway the answer will always be Adventure. That’s nostalgia central for me. A lot of it was pretty straightforward storytelling, other seasons did more creative stuff, but I think that’s to be expected - this series built the foundation for all that. And it’s great in its own way. What I particularly liked was always the whole “kids trying to figure shit out on their own” bit. For a kids’ show, they actually did it pretty well. Usually kids in that situation act just like really competent adults and don’t really struggle. Digimon certainly had that too, but it let the kids be crybabies, be selfish, be ignorant... it was really about their personal growth and that’s why they got to be kids as well.

Favorite Adventure Chosen Child (older 6):

Taichi!! Do I even need to explain myself? I will anyway. I didn’t care about him much when I was ten. For a long time I didn’t have a favorite character. It was Yamato for about thirty seconds, and then it was Takeru for about two years. After 02, I rewatched both seasons, and suddenly realized Taichi was Everything to me. I never really went for leader characters, never liked brash, brainless, bring-the-brawn types, or stern, distant ones, cold except when showing their passion for their mission.

But Taichi isn’t like either of those. He has bits of both - he can be brainless, and he’s pretty brash, but he’s calculating too. I liked that mix, but mainly I liked that he just seemed like a regular kid who the others were naturally drawn to as a leader because he was Mr. Get-shit-done. The older I get, the more I appreciate that proactive factor in people. Sometimes you just need someone to say the thing that’s on everyone’s minds. It can be scary. So I feel gratitude when someone takes the lead when I can’t. I think that’s how the other kids felt towards Taichi - for all his flaws, he kept them going, he didn’t let them waffle and miss their chances. I like him for a ton of other reasons too but I’ll end there for today!

Favorite 02 Chosen Child (younger 6):

Takeru. He was my original fav and I really really wanted to see him be awesome in 02. Unfortunately, he and Hikari didn’t really get much development. (They still made out better than all Frontier kids not named Kouji, though.) But I loved his anger issues and his facing his trauma. They should have done so much more. I really wanted him to bond with Ken over the fact that they’d both lost partners... I loved seeing older Takeru in Tri, the trauma issue came up again when he was the first one to realize his partner was infected. I’ve never been so moved by a crying plush doll lmao. Also his fashion sense, woot.

The runner-up is worth a mention since she wasn’t part of the original Adventure group and therefore could be considered my true 02 fav - Miyako. I loved the nerdy glasses girl because I was a nerdy glasses girl. I wasn’t as outspoken as Miyako, but I could go on and on about things I liked. I loved how pure and flawed she was and I loved her inner sense of right and wrong and her frankness. It’s refreshing when so many characters hide their true feelings. And I loved her and Hikari. Hikari and Miyako are the true girl friendship in those series. Sora and Mimi are nice but didn’t get the same level of development. Of course, I headcanon they were all awesome girlfriends.

Favorite Digimon partner:

This is an IMPOSSIBLE question, I love ALL OF THEM. I can’t pick one.

Gabumon: the way he and Yamato don’t need words, he just understands him, and when he doesn’t, always assume the best and gives him space. Their connection through music. And the way Gabumon will tease him especially over Taichi XD Gabumon keeps Yamato in line.

Gomamon: the way he is just what Jou needs, someone to keep him positive. I’m anxiety-prone myself and one reason I love my job working with young children is they make me see the bright things that I used to be able to see all the time when I was a child. I never really wanted to grow up. I think Gomamon is that for Jou, the child in him he doesn’t want to let go of, and doesn’t actually have to, because we take that part of us into our future.

Tentomon: because was he not MVP of the YEAR in Kokuhaku!?!?!?!?! That was amaaaaazing. Also he is easily the funniest Digimon and I love how he brings out the affectionate side of Koushirou. Again he’s exactly what Koushirou needs.

Patamon: Because he’s cuuuuute!!! and gives Takeru something to nurture and protect while also protecting him. Takeru, the youngest, who needed to be protected but also needed to grow, got a Digimon with those exact same qualities. PERFECT MATCH.

Hawkmon: I always loved him paired with Miyako. He was my favorite 02 partner. He was grumpy and irritable yet caring with Miyako, basically the compass she needed when she felt panicky. And he was COOL. Like he had the best evolutions lol. And as the only male/female partner set (I know Digimon don’t have true genders but this isn’t a made up thing either), there was a slightly different dynamic, like Miyako needed someone a bit more her opposite than other Chosen, to help push her in new directions.

Agumon: He gets honorable mention in particular because of Tri! But also because of 02. In Adventure, Taichi didn’t have a strong grasp of what it meant to raise his partner. He and Agumon saw each other as equals - which they are - but you do see a shift in that balance as Taichi gets older. Agumon is very powerful, but very child-like and thoughtless. In 02 and Tri, we see Taichi taking care of him much more like a big brother with a young brother. In Adventure, they just played together and wound each other up. What this means is Taichi’s grown up to be quite the caretaker, out of necessity - his partner is a bit high maintenance compared to the others! And caretaker isn’t usually the quality that jumps to mind when you think of “anime protagonist” or even leader. So I LOVE it. Also, Agumon struggles to express big concepts. But he can express really important things in simple ways, and Taichi needs that simplicity when his head gets all muddled with complexity. We definitely saw that in Tri. Agumon is kinda the Doraemon of Digimon, lol.

And I love literally all of the others and could go on about them for ages. But I’ll stop here. Will continue the countdown (er, I guess I can’t call it that when I’m doing it like this) later.

[mikkock]

HELLO I ADORE YOUR OCS SO MUCH WILL YOU TELL ME ABOUT KAI HE LOOKS LIKE A TOTAL "YOUR DAUGHTER CALLS ME DADDY TOO" DOUCHEBAG AND I FUCKING LOVE HIM AND WANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT HIM

LBLMVBGK THANK U OMG love it when ppl like my kids, im a proud dad rn

ALSO wrow congrats on ur on point analysis, cause, that’s the Essence Of His Being (fun fact since i got two characters who go by the name of kai -cause fuck that basic writing tip that says ‘dont have two characters named the same thing- i usually refer to him as The Bad Kai cuz he a bad bitch)

so lets unwrap that dude shall we uwu 

SO this dude was created when i realised my story didnt have antagonists so i made a bunch of Bad People and then they all became good people after i started giving them more personnality somehow eXCEPt him for some reason, the only survivor of the “everyone will be baby” plague, the only rude bitch in this house, the only guy who’s still on the dark grey side of morally grey...but tbh im in love with him cause he’s an asshole and im an idiot so like.

His base concept was basically something along the lines of “fuckboy but make it Couture”, like douchebag indeed But Gotta Be Fancy at being one, gotta add a pinch of Sneaky Bitch in the pot. His aesthetic is Chillin, gettin in ur pants, then moving on for some more chillin and more pants. So if you’re into some funky sexy time with no pressure and no ties, ya gon get along, your goals meet, time to have fun.

All that is supported by his charisma, cause unless ya got some nasty history, he’ll just look like that charming bad-boy “oho hot dude with a dangerous but not agressive” vibed person, and he’s quite a sweet-talker. He’s probs not only the ‘your daughter calls me daddy’ kind but also ‘and so will YOU, i’m scoring with the whole family and you wont stop me (and you wont WANT to stop me)’ 

He got that handsome ppl priviledge ya feel

but also, he wouldnt be a rude guy if he was just the ‘i enjoy chill frick-fracking and im just so sexy that no one can say no to that booty’ guy

Dude got quiiite some spite-fueled ego and Does Not Take losing well, and will not, in fact, let himself lose on any objective he has, and when that objective is A Person, he gets ugly. Being good at sweet talking also means being good at small stuff like “not saying exactly the truth always when it would be more beneficial not to”, “deliberately using euphemistic, ambiguous or obscure language so to mask wrong doings and technically saying the truth but in such a way that it becomes completely masked by a thick fog of bullshit”, and “use words and behaviour in general to influence others unscrupulously so to get something in return”. Even a little “playing with their perception in order to make them doubt in their thoughts and selves”. In short dude got no qualms about using all the tools of manipulation available if it means that he comes on top (or on bottom if the goal was getting an assful eeeeeey we’re masters of comedy here) It tends to be all for short term results tho, so not much your ‘boyfriend who convinces you you’re nothing without him” and more of a “you thought you were dating but only you were thinking that as he always kept it just vague enough to have you not official yet convinced of his and now you’re blaming yourself for believing you were together”

master of getting ass, also master of Ugly Ass Breakups, and master of suddenly dissapearing from your life so hard that you wonder if it was just your imagination all along (he got ugly past with a bunch of other ocs especially he’s ex boyfriend with two that are now together cause i dig that sort of drama the sAME dUDe gave u the trust issues that held u from going full lovey dovey ? i fucking lIVE off that kinda shit wait until he pops back like ‘oho hello fancy seeing YOU TWO here my two fave exes together incredible what a small world”)

Though I have to rework on all that cause that backstory is oLD AS SHIT (like prolly i built it in what, 2016? ew ugly) I had that stem from some sort of neglect-fueled inferiority complex. I had given him a kinda cold family with a bunch of siblings who got Way More Nurtured due to their respective talents and achievements, having him left behind and feeling like he got nothing. SO that’s basically the explanation as of today but i dont like iiiiit anymooooore so I’ll have to work on it to make it something i dig, cause idk, bitch feels flat so far.

BUT i do intend on keeping the whole concept of ~Loneliness~, and of him working alone and quite hard for anything he gets. And the general need of proving himself that had come from the WIP backstory. I don’t exactly see him as an overachiever at all, but definitly as an obstinate and persevering hardworking guy, because “Look YALL I WAS aBLE TO DO THIS YALL THOUGHT I COULDNT HUH YALL LOOK DOWN ON ME well fuck u cause idc im better than u now also ur mum’s into bondage i kno from experience bye”. So tbh pair up with him for group projects, you’ll be sure his share of the work will be done (but also if you dont do yours then he’s probably going to be a bITCh about it, no remorse in leaving blank slides in the middle of the powerpoint and then loudly proclaiming ‘OH RIGHT This was supposed to be Kevin’s part but I suppose he never sent it to me, despite the numerous reminders i sent him, no big deal, no hard feelings, its ok sweetie we all sometimes feel too lazy i forgive u :)” )

Also he’d be Chill to hang out with for like, parties, nights out at the bar, that kinda shit. He definetly has some beans to spill about quite some people, he gathers the goss as he gathers lovers (i was gonna end that in “as he spreads legs” but it sounded too PG-18 for this good Well Behaved family friendly blog) and Will Not stay tight lipped, and Will be a bitch when trashtalking people, and It Will Be Entertaining as it always is when you’re hearing about crazy exes and you’ve had some beers. 

Now trivia that idk where else to write cause idk i stupid or more like disorganised :

- he digs red ale beer like if ya wanna win him over with the appropriate alcohol offer there u go

- he’s a fake blonde (cause my hobby is painting regrowth roots on hair)

- his design is a mixture of those 3dgy denim boys u see on pinterest and the specific brand of fuckboys that are french-L-section-chic-grunge-hipster-fuckboys (L section is like a branch of highschool)(that word combo is a so specific kinda guy)(its kinda like a softboi but more arrogant but in a lowkey way)(also they rich)(but he’s not rich so guess that should make him Less Arrogant)

-im constantly dead afraid of giving him more characteristics and story or whatveer cause he’s the only meanie i got left and i do Not want him to stop being an asshole but everytime i develop a character they end up nice or redeemed or whatever and i wanna keep him a bitch so i neglect him (just like his parents in his 2016 version wow)

he smokes (prolly started quite early to Be Kool and now relies on it for stress relief)

he’s outspoken and extraverted and prolly the guy who had a lot to say when you were doing debates in class (there’s always that person who has a Lot to argument about)(its him) but outside of a Set and Defined debate structure he probably doesnt give his mind voraciously 

he’s a law student and despite saying he’s the one bad guy left he probably wont be a corrupt lawyer or judge or whatever like come on he will do his job properly he worked hARD FOR THIS justice may be served

he’s not the kind to openly hate or even dislike anyone cause what’s the point of wasting your energy on that? its much funnier to him to be obnoxiously Neutral with someone and basically ignore them but still strike them with some Spikes of passive-agressive comments, let them be Mad at your calmness

he’s 177cm tall (that’s like 5.8 according to google)

honestly if you’re bros with him he’s fun to be with the being a jerk is completly coincidental 

he probably ranks high in the list of “those criminals who steal big lighters from their friends” 

i think at a point his design had tattoos but i forgot the designs of those so now he doesnt anymore

a dog person

i think ive run out of facts (or my brain dead) so im leavin with a shirtless pic cause my hobby is drawing tits

in short, charming asshole who can get ugly, secretly feels lonely and small, works hard for himself, better have him as a friend than as a foe though probably not the most frontally agressive enemy, and also, your booty, hand it over.

[dbzebra]

Not Just A Fling

Authors Note: So a few weeks ago, someone in my discord chat psted a fic that within the very first paragraph had Goten and Marron break up and say they were just a fling. Safe to say I was a lil butthurt. In response, I made this out of pure spite. It’s cheesy as fuck but at this point idc lmao

(Also, Marron is only 1 year younger than Goten as opposed to 3 in this. So shes 17 while hes 18. Just keep that in mind)

Pairing: Goten x Marron

Time Period: 11 years after Buu / 1 year post EOZ

Words: 1958

Son Goten stared at his now mostly empty bedroom. Boxes were stacked on the floor next to his old dresser. He still couldn't believe that he was going away to college tomorrow. He spent his whole life on Mt. Paozu and now he was leaving. At least temporarily. He could never truly move away. City life was not a permanent thing for him.

Until senior year, the eighteen year-old had no intention in going to college-and his parents were okay with that. If he really wanted to he could've just asked Bulma for a job at Capsule Corporation and she would've gave him one in a heartbeat. But boring office life wasn't his thing at all. He'd go crazy after a week of filing papers and answering phones about the same old crap. So he figured he'd give it a shot. College life was supposed to be so much better than high school, right?

At least, that's what Trunks told him. Goten's lifelong partner in crime was just finishing his freshman year at West City University, and the boys couldn't wait to dorm together.

Marron was sitting on the bed, happily twirling her golden locks in her fingers as Goku and Goten made the finishing touchings on packing. A part of him couldn’t believe they’d been dating for three years already.

"All set buddy?" Goku said, placing the last box down.

"Yeah, I'm good. Can you go check on Mom for me? She might still be a mess."

Goku smiled and went to find his wife. "Good idea."

He was going to miss the early morning training routine with his younger son. Goten had restarted his training back when he and Marron started going out a few years back. Nothing made Goku more proud than to see the great men his boys had become. Though despite not having his father’s extra push, Goten promised to keep up his training. He vowed to one day surpass his father.

“Trunks is comin’ right?” Marron asked him. She had on a white blouse, a pink skirt and matching shoes. Her long blonde hair cascaded down her shoulders and back.

“Yeah, he just pulled up. He’s takin’ some stuff to the place now so it’ll be less of a load tomorrow.”

Goten went out into the living room to see his dad comforting a distraught Chi-Chi. The day she never thought would come finally came. Her baby boy was leaving her for good and never coming back. At least in her mind he was. Despite everything Goku said, it seemed to only make Chi-Chi cry more.

"Come on, honey. Goten can visit any time with Instant Transmission. Besides, you didn't cry this much when Gohan left..."

"Because... I-I still had m-m-my baby... And n-now... he's leaving!" Chi-Chi wailed and melted back into sobs while Goku rubbed her back.

Goten glanced to Goku who smiled sadly. Goten flashed his father an apologetic look before going outside to meet Trunks who had just pulled up in his capsule car.

He greeted Trunks with a signature fist-bump and led the older Saiyan inside.

"Classes start Tuesday right? Because of the holiday Monday." Goten asked as they walked in.

Marron waved to Trunks who nodded back.

"Yeah, but the real shit don't even start until like two weeks later. Syllabus week is a pain but you literally just gotta show up."

"Hey that's the part I'm good at. The rest? Not so much."

Trunks chuckled. "You would say that."

"How's the place lookin? It's all fixed up right?"

"Man, it's gonna be wild. You and me on our own, we finally get to live! The campus is sick too. We got a townhouse all to ourselves and it's only a block from the food court!" Trunks went on about what it was like. He roomed by himself last year, and had a blast. But this year- this year would be another level.

"I'll probably be at the food court more than the dorm!" Goten joked. "That place'll be outta business by the end of the month!"

"...Dude, I'm telling you. Our place is gonna be chick city!" Trunks put an arm around his friend’s shoulder.

Marron flinched.

Goten shook his head, laughing. "Do you hear yourself? You sound like a frat boy when you're the furthest thing from it. Besides, I'm spoken for. Right babe?" He looked to his beautiful girlfriend.

She cracked a smile at Goten's joke, but her face hid a tinge of sadness... or was it worry? He couldn't tell.

"Mare? Something wrong?" He asked. He tuned Trunks out as he kept carrying on about the possibilities.

Marron took a deep breath and wiped her eyes before looking up at Goten sadly. "Trunks is right... One of these days... you'll meet some hot sorority girl with much more experience and forget all about me..." She sniffled.

Goten looked stunned while Trunks instantly bad. "Marron, I was just..."

She shook her head, looking away from him. "Maybe it's better that we… that just save ourselves the heartbreak and-"

Goten gently cut her off with a kiss. She was stunned at first but soon relaxed into it. Goten pulled the blonde to her feet and continued kissing her to show how much she meant to him. Marron felt all the doubt in her mind wash away as she kissed him back.

Once they broke apart, Marron gaped up at him breathlessly. Her heart was still caught in her throat.

"Mare, I love you." He said with that same smile that always melted her heart. "You're the only girl I need. I don't care how many other girls there are, I only want you. You're not some silly fling to me. You're my best friend. I love you. And when you come to WCU next year, I'll show the most amazing girlfriend in the world to everyone on campus."

Marron felt the pain and worry leave her heart as relief washed over her. It was all in her head after all. "I love you too. I'm sorry, I just- I just thought about losing you and I..."

"Never in a million years."

Trunks grinned and put his hands on his hips. "I figured. More girls for me then! With my good looks they won't keep their hands off me!"

"Yeah until you open your mouth and then they run for their lives." Goten replied back with a grin of his own. Trunks rolled his eyes and chuckled.

Marron sighed happily and laid back on the bed. "Come to think it, dating a college boy is pretty hot."

“So is dating head cheerleader.”

"Gross." Trunks gagged. "Get a room."

"We're already in my room." Goten joked.

"Oh shut up!" Trunks fired back and turned to send a quick message on his phone. Work stuff. He hated having to work at Capsule Corp. That was partly the reason he enrolled in school despite not needing to -to get his mom off his back. Honestly if he had an out, he'd take it in a heartbeat. "So seriously though, we gotta plan how this place is gonna look!"

"We need a sick game room. Oh! And a second game room." Goten added.

"And a gravity chamber!"

"Don't forget a guest room."

"Why? For when Marron visits?"

"Nah, she'd sleep in my room." Goten turned to wink at her. Blushing, Marron smiled and winked back.

Trunks smirked. "We'd better make sure it's soundproof then."

Marron coughed and hide her blushing face while Goten laughed with a hand behind his head.

"That's what I thought." Trunks smirked.

The blonde then noticed a small white box on the side of his bed. Goten saved that box for last. It was probably the most important thing of them all.

"What's in this?"

Goten grinned. "Take a look."

She opened it up and gasped.

It was everything from their dates over the years, including stuff that dated back to childhood. The movie ticket from their first date was on top. Photo booth pictures, arcade tickets, toys from when they were kids, and more. And most of all, a used-up old Ring Pop wrapped in an old piece of paper.

Marron could cry. Of happiness this time. In fact she almost did. "You actually kept this?"

She unwrapped the old piece of paper and giggled. In blue crayon was an agreement on the rules of the game.

'Marriage Rules.'

Rule 1: be nice

Rule 2: hold hands

Rule 3: step on any icky spiders

Rule 4: kiss on the cheek once a day

However rule 4 was crossed out in black crayon and said 'no cooties' under it.

Below the rules was their little signatures next to each other in sloppy writing.

Goten came over her shoulder and grinned. "I still laugh whenever I look at that."

"Dummy. A beautiful girl offers to kiss you and you turn it down?" She flipped her hair behind her back, feigning anger.

"I was seven! Besides, that's one of the best parts now."

"Oh yeah?" Marron purred and leaned closer to him. "Prove it."

Trunks groaned before anything could go any further. "Jesus you two. Could you knock it off for five seconds? I'm gonna throw up."

Marron giggled again and looked to the old Ring Pop. Goten ate it within an hour. She remembered being upset with him at the time. But still- he kept it.

"You remember all this, right?"

"I remember you forcing him, Marron. And you made me be the dog!"

"Can it." She quipped, smirking at him. Trunks only laughed. "Of course I remember." She smiled.

Those days of childhood were like a distant memory now.

Goten hugged Marron from behind and then spun her around to kiss her forehead. "We should try the real thing one of these days."

Marron looked up at him in shock, her cheeks flushing pink. "...What did you just say?"

Trunks couldn't believe his ears. Did he just hear what he think he just heard? He blinked, and then blinked again. He stared at Goten similar to how Marron was.

Goten nodded and kissed her again. He took a deep breath. He didn’t even feel nervous. Not even a bit. "...Marron, will you marry me?”

Marron stared up at him, covering her mouth with her hand as happy tears freely flowed now. Every ounce of her wanted to scream with joy as he continued babbling.

“Once I finish school... we can have a real wedding. Like the one you've always dreamed about. I know it’s sudden, a-and I don't have a ring yet, but-"

Marron flung her arms around Goten, cutting him off with a deep kiss. All the joy in the world couldn’t describe what she was feeling right now. What she had wanted since she was a child finally came true. She was the happiest girl alive. She pulled back, smiling as bright as could be. “Yes. A million times yes. Let's do it. Let's get married."

Goten grinned wider than he ever did and cheered. He picked Marron up and swung his girlfriend-no, fiancee around in his arms, laughing together. After another long blissful kiss, Goten put the blonde back on her own two feet.

She rested her head on his shoulder as neither moved from their embrace. "I love you so much Goten..."

"I love you too, Mare." He smiled and buried his face into hair.

Trunks ran up and congratulated his two best friends with a big group hug. The best part was-- he got to be the best man. His speech was gonna be amazing.

They were really engaged. The next part-- telling their parents. It was a small step in starting their new life together, but they were ready for anything.

[smireyac]

fuck this year man u dont even get cute emojis in the title this time

so lemme just start by saying fuck 2020 

now that we’re on the same page, lets get into it

so i dont have to explain all the reasons why this year sucked bc u just need to google 2020 and there will be a million reasons why it was TOTAL FUCKING GARBAGE...... usually when so many people collectively say a year sucked ass, i can be like “oh it wasnt *all* bad for me, personally” haha not this year!!! 

its super fucking depressing to look at how hopeful and positive i was about 2020 a year ago..... ofc there was no way for me to have known it would all go to shit but i still really appreciate the tone i had set... reading over the previous reflections and seeing how harsh and negative i was @ myself made the softness of last years post super refreshing.... 

now i said i dont *have* to explain all the ways 2020 was shitty, but i am gonna explain the biggest reason this year was shitty for me, personally..... it might seem really small in comparison to the ways 2020 was shitty as a whole on like a global scale? but really the biggest reason 2020 sucked ass was i didnt get to really hang out with any of my friends in real life for 9 out of the 12 months of the year.... and really it was like the first week of march that shit hit the fan so like really it was only 2 months that we got to see each other....... if u rmbr p much every previous retrospective post ive made, there was a big emphasis on friends..... ive come to realize that im actually a very *extra*verted person??? despite my overall shyness and homebody attitude, i would always choose to hang out with people over being alone so stay-at-home orders FUCKING SUCKED??? when we all thought it would be over in a couple weeks, maybe a month it was fine?? hey its a good time to draw or catch up on that reading and/or writing i said i was gonna do maybe even start learning to drive?? it’ll be no big deal THEN it wasn’t over in a month and it wasnt gonna BE over anytime soon and no one important was doing anything about it and its an election year and black lives have always mattered and yet everything is so uncertain and

[inhale]

[exhale]

this year was..... a lot...... too much in fact

in 2018, i had said that i watched vox’s video on the year in 5 mins and cried... if i watched this year in five minutes, i dont think i would be able to breathe...... 

SO instead of making myself CRY..... lets try to think about any GOOD things that happened and think about what we can do to make 2021 good for ourselves:

GOOD THINGS THAT HAPPENED:

-i *didn’t* lose my job!! sad that so many others cannot say the same but im trying to make myself feel *better* not WORSE so i got to keep my job and i actually work more hours than before so!!

-i actually *did* learn to drive this year!!!! and im pretty good at it??? for someone that just started this year anyway?? i probably *would* have my DRIVER’S LICENSE right now if it weren’t for a surge in cases in a certain STATE that i happen to live in......... but w/e its fine i get more time to practice and im ~~**DEFINITELY**~~ going pass my test and get my license ~whenever it is that i can reschedule my dmv appt~

lmfao its so funny that last year, i was absolutely *dreading* learning to drive but i so fucking get why everyone was like ‘you need to learn how to drive’ i legit love it so much???? ive always been a car person but that was like purely for the aesthetic but now that i can drive im just....... WOOOW this really is what freedom feels like.... like ik that public transportation is amazing and i will always champion it but nothing beats being purely in control of your destination.... i also wanted to buy myself a car for my birthday even tho i couldnt really drive yet but then sien had to fix smthg on her car and it was EXPENSIVE AF and my mom was like “u dont need to buy a car yet” so i put the brakes [haha] on that... but soon... once i get my license,,, then i will have u my love................. so with that being “my most serious goal of 2020″ im glad i did it

-i was one of lucky ones and got unemployment when i couldn’t work so i have a lot of money saved in the bank??? pls no one steal my identity i wanna use that money to buy myself a car and/or for when we move out 🤞🤞 we’ll just have to wait and seeeeee....................

-i had mentioned playing dnd last year too and thats been going STRONG as hell thank goodness....... we couldnt keep playing in person but when we moved it to online, not only did we actually get to hang out a lot more, we made more friends??? introduced new people to the group?? its so good and in fact probably the only thing that kept me even a little bit sane this year...... 

-this is more of an honorable mention than an accomplishment but im this 🤏close to catching up with critical role and thats partially thanks to the pandemic lmao sooooo ??? 

aaaaaaand thats p much it lol i didnt really accomplish any of my other goals bc reasons................. but!!! as cliche as it sounds, with a light at the end of the tunnel, im confident that i can turn that all around this year.... so if 2016 was the year of change, 2017 was the year of getting used to shit, 2018 was the year of getting *too* used to shit and 2019 ended up being the year of friends, 2020 was the year of absolute shit and it doesn’t fucking count....... i learned a lot this year, biggest lesson of all is that life is short and if i were to have died at any point last year, what the fuck would i have to show for it??? so usually i end up giving a theme or name to a year after its done but this time im determined to make 2021 into what i want it to be SO i am declaring this year, the year of our lord 2021, the year of new experiences!!!! what the fuck does that mean you ask? well ill tell you!!! im gonna try new things this year!! make a very pointed effort to do things outside my comfort zone?? and for my goals this year, im going back to my old way of making a huge list of stuff u wanna do and seeing how much i can actuallly accomplish!! now i said theres a light but we really dont know when all this shit will end and life will go “bAcK tO nOrMaL” so whos to say ill get to accomplish any of it? at the same time, there are plenty of stuff on the list that i can do within the pandemic set parameters so!! lets see this list!!

2021 GOALS:

[check boxes bc there is no plain box emoji lmao]

☑️ read new books!! i’ll keep last years goal bc i didnt meet it and i have good reads now which tells me i just need to read 1.5 books a month to reach that goal!! huzzah!

☑️ watch new shows and new movies b4 u end up watching shit you’ve already seen a million times... i bought an old planner for 2020 instead of 2021 by accident but i hope it will help keep track of the movies/shows along with the books too!

☑️ listen to new music!! this years spotify wrapped was garbo it only had like 3 albums and a bunch of other shit i always listen to so i gotta fix that lmfao

☑️ write new stories!! i am comforted by the shit ive been writing for the past like 7 years but if my screenplay class taught me anything its that there are a lot of stories to tell and i got so many ideas floating around in this noggin!! instead of an arbitrary word count, why dont i say write idk 3 new stories, start to finish, in whatever medium idc screenplay, short story, comic, twine WHATEVER!! do it!

☑️ eat new food!! lmao this one seems the most silly to me but ive never had indian food, ive never had [not really anyway] korean food, i want to find new restaurants and eat new food!!! yum!

☑️ go on a road trip!!

☑️ visit some place ive never been before!!

☑️ go on a hike??

☑️ go to mexico again

☑️ ride a scary rollercoaster you previously wouldnt have

☑️ go to a club

☑️ get silly drunk fr 

☑️ FUCK IT go on dates!! self date friend dates sister date cousin dates R- Romantic... dates ??? FUCK IT!!! YEAH!! DATE ALL UP IN THIS BITCH!!

☑️ learn to use blender

☑️ animate something 

☑️ make a big painting

☑️ cosplay ???? AHH

☑️ learn to roller skate lmao u bought the skates and were so excited for them!! 

☑️ go somewhere SUPER DARK and go see some real stars!!!! 

☑️ and to top it all off, throw the airbnb house party that we’ve been talking about for MONTHS lmao 

hmmmm,, i think thats a good enough list for now ?? another thing i wanted to accomplish.... that im scared to speak into existence bc then i cant back out of doing it...........and it doesnt align with the whole “new” spirit of 2021 but.......... i want to like start making apartments for rent????? like i want to have something of it to show by, if not the 8th anniversary then by the end of the year HHUFF THERE I SAID IT......... no turning back now.......... 

alright its almost midnight on.... whats this? its already jan. 1st??? lmao yeah fuck it i didnt keep up with anything i normally did this year who cares i made up the rules i can break them too lol  

so yeah 

we’ll see what this year brings us,,,,

hoo boy

[sitaaronkepaar]

Daily Rikara Ramblings

I feel I should rename this liveblog occasional Rikara ramblings cause I ain't so regular anymore. I wasn't even gonna do them today bur Gauri legit went on a slayage spree and I just couldn't control myself. Legit watching this episode second time in a row. And I'll probably even watch the Gauri bits on TV again. What? No one ever accused ke of having a life. Jo bhi thi, Gauri Kumari Sharma has taken over it now. 💜

Also, this is like super low effort but I HAD to do it anyway cause my head was exploding with all them thoughts. LOL.

Chennai express ki 2 rs copy hai, but feels k liye saala kuch bhi karega. This scene looks rly nice aesthetically too.

Epi start hote hi Queenie has gone on a slayage spree. My wig's already snatched and it's been like 2 secs in.

I knew Gauri would blame Omkara's changed behaviour on his guilt. Chalo kahin toh consistency hain. Assuming Omkara's kindness is out of his guilt is her go to behaviour.

Okay, Omkara STFU. Galtiyan maan k koi meherbani nahi ki hain. Itni insult aur disrespect k baad it was legit the least you could do. Matlab do you even have an inkling of the emotional abuse you put her through? These emotional scars won't heal themselves so fast. I know you have this shadi ki sword hanging over your head but pls, control yourself.

Again, with the patni shit. How convenient for you Omkie? Jab woh acceptance k liye mar rahi thi tab yaad nahi aaya? You couldn't see anything past your hatred then, why expect Gauri to be the bigger person now?

YESSSS. Queenie dikhaing him his shakal in the mirror.

I hope Omkara's flashbacking to the time he burnt Gauri's pictures when he thought she was having an affair. Cause I always thought it was unfair on his part to expect such loyalty from her when he never gave the love and respect she deserved. Love, loyalty, trust, respect, these are the things that are earned. Universal right nahi hai.

Lmao, Omkara's face legit like, "dayum, she got a point"

"ek baat pooche aapse, aapne hamare saath jo jo kiya, humne aapke saath kiya hota toh"

Yaaassssss Queen, roast.his.ass.

Seriously, if she'd done it to you? Tab kya karta Omkie? I always wanted Omkie to put himself in her shoes and now queenie's demanding the same. Yessss bitch, yessss.

Oh, I'm so glad they're raising this layak wala issue again. I really wanted Omkara to address her concerns. Matlab sab kuch mil raha hai aajkal. As a Rikarian, I can't believe my kismat. Wallah, jaldi phootne wali hogi lagta hai.

Fuck yar, this lack of love and respect in their relationship that bothered me so much is finally being addressed and I can't take it. Is it really happening?

Gauri's asking the right questions rn. It doesn't fucking matter if Omkara didn't mean to make her feel any less or that now, he wants her. The fact is that he abused her to the point that she lost her self-confidence. What he thought or didn't think, what he meant or didn't mean, don't matter when he's given her less than humanly treatment for the most part of their relationship.

Ugh, I know you think the world of Shivika, Gauri, but can you not compare? Like after RuVya, they're the most toxic relationship on the show. Sure, NOW Shivaay loves and respects her, but he isn't that great a guy like you think. Gauri ko shivika puran padhao koi.

Lol, but 2 steps ahead toh you've always been when it comes to the relationship Gauri. Poor Omkara's always catching up. Forgive him, my son's a late bloomer.

Aww, Gauri thinks it's plain old male ego and jealousy. It's not true but at least Omkara's bearing this in silence. Normally, idc about his manpain. But I do feel bad for him. Anyway, Ab pachtaye hot kya jab chidiya chug gayi khet? You should've loved her when you had the chance.

"Jaaiye aap yahan se, kyuki ab jo bhi karna hai, hamein hi karna hai"

Uff, the dismissal!! Cold, queen. That was so cold!

Hey, Bhagwan, she ripped off the dupatta. STONE.COLD. Not even Steve Austin is that cold. But my main bitch has had it till here with Omkara's chutiyapa. Girl be like, let me deal with this alone, as usual.

I love, love, LOVE this scene of Gauri walking away and then stopping to wipe her tears and moving on anyway. Cause this is who she is in a nutshell. She might get hurt, she might break down, but she will ALWAYS get up and keep moving and do what needs to be done, even if she's dying inside. My Queen's unstoppable yo!

And Omkara looking on haplessly as Gauri breaks down is 👌👌👌. This is the level of damage you've inflicted on her. Now, look at the result of your destruction. What you broke isn't so easily repairable, bitch.

Uff, aagya ye psycho Ajay.

Okay wtf. Your mom also said yes? Woh na nahi bol sakti thi? What an asshole.

Gauri looks like she's barely holding on. Ek jhaanp me sata dene wali hain isko.

LOL WTF. EK SHAADI SHUDA AURAT PE DORE DAALTE HUE IZZAT KHARAB NAHI HUI BUT IS SE HO RAHI HAI. MY GOD, I HATE MEN SO FUCKING MUCH. SOMEONE NEEDS TO KILL THIS BITCH ASAP.

Low-key hoping Omkara heard it though. Doesn’t look like it but goddamit, I need someone to know about this blackmail

I know this has nothing to do with Rikara, but bhavya's rant is so anti-feminist? Honestly, I'd never have expected this from her of all people. Why would you paint women as these illogical, ott, emotional beings with no connection to reality? Esp when you have a job where you have to deal with this casual sexism of men on a daily basis? Stuff like this is what legit stops you from getting promotions? Fuck, I hate this shit so much. I'm not saying you should respect all women, but at least don't paint all of us with such broad strokes, esp when it has such lasting negative effects on us. We have to deal with this shit from men already, we don't need women doing this too.

[broke-ass-twat]

Divisible by one. Also is that you in your icon picture? Cause whoever it is really fucking cute.

Aw shucks I bet whoever it is really appreciates that compliment :3 On the other hand non appreciative of the fact that every number is divisible by one .-

1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? 

Um. All of them?

2. Is your room messy or clean?

A little bit mess

3. What color are your eyes?

Brown

4. Do you like your name? why?

I like the name that everyone calls me because it’s mine and I like the way it sounds.

5. What is your relationship status? 

Taken

6. Describe your personality in 3 words or less

Lazy, calm, random

7. What color hair do you have?

Black

8. What kind of car do you drive? color?

I don’t drive >.>

9. Where do you shop?

Wherever I want to

10. How would you describe your style?

Comfortable non-adventurous outfits that work well when almost any components are mixed and matched. If I had more money then maybe a bit more stylishly so.

11. Favorite social media account

Tumblr or instagram

12. What size bed do you have? 

Twin long atm

13. Any siblings?

I have a twin sister

14. If you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

Hmmm. I guessssss. Um. Hmm. Somewhere I Europe just cuz of culture and food and then other places that I want to go are sort of more easily accessible cuz I’d be more centrally located relative to those places? Idk.

15. Favorite snapchat filter? 

Don’t use them don’t have one

16. Favorite makeup brand(s)

Don’t use any don’t have one

17. How many times a week do you shower?

Idk like 5

18. Favorite tv show?

Adventure time I suppose? There are probably ones that make me more emotional but thats just easy to watch at any point

19. Shoe size?

Like 11

20. How tall are you?

6 feet tall

21. Sandals or sneakers? 

Sneakers

22. Do you go to the gym? 

Nopeeeeee

23. Describe your dream date

There’s good experiences and no pressure on wither party. Just talking and hopefully laughing and finding out more about each other.

24. How much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

Physically $0

25. What color socks are you wearing? 

White as the soiled snow after a few cars have driven on it

26. How many pillows do you sleep with?

One

27. Do you have a job? what do you do? 

Nope

28. How many friends do you have? 

A good number

29. Whats the worst thing you have ever done? 

Um. I don’t think I’ve really done anything that bad. I guess ever done would be

30. Whats your favorite candle scent? 

Don’t have one

31. 3 favorite boy names

Charles (for shits not actually), Sebastian (also for shits), Bob (for shits)

32. 3 favorite girl names

Emily, Cara (appeals to me atm for some reason?), Rose

33. Favorite actor? 

Don’t have one

34. Favorite actress? 

Emma stone atm I guess but not cuz of talent cuz I can’t tell that

35. Who is your celebrity crush?

idk idc

36. Favorite movie? 

Don’t really have one. Whichever one made me feel the most intense positive emotion

37. Do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? 

Not really any more. The Kite Runner was a pretty dope book tbh

38. Money or brains? 

Both? Brains tho. Hopefully would lead to money as well

39. Do you have a nickname? what is it? 

Kem

40. How many times have you been to the hospital?

Once actually and a bunch of other times with my mom whose a nurse

41. Top 10 favorite songs

Seriously this is awful. 

I’ll be alright (tonight) by Mura Masa

Woke by Saturn & Orygin

Do I Wanna Know? by Kuma

Especial by Sango

Recess Over Chinatown by Kodak to Graph

Tennessee by Allan Rayman

Miss you by Mura Masa

Know Me Better by Mura Masa

Francis Forever (Ryan Hemsworth remix) by Mitski

Girls That Dance by Masego and Medasin

42. Do you take any medications daily?

Nope

43. What is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

No actual idea

44. What is your biggest fear? 

Failing at life in general

45. How many kids do you want? 

2

46. Whats your go to hair style?

I don’t really have one?

47. What type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) 

A condo

48. Who is your role model? 

Don’t really have one

49. What was the last compliment you received?

That I was sexy

50. What was the last text you sent?

I will

51. How old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

Um. idk prolly like 8 or something

52. What is your dream car? 

Tesla? idk a Lamborghini or somethin?

53. Opinion on smoking?

It’s bad for you and you probably shouldn’t do it

54. Do you go to college? 

Yup

55. What is your dream job? 

One that makes me happy while leaving me enough mental energy to have a life

56. Would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? 

Suburbs

57. Do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? 

They’d have to be my favorite fucking scent for me to feel tempted to do that

58. Do you have freckles? 

Pft nope.

59. Do you smile for pictures?

Depends on the picture

60. How many pictures do you have on your phone? 

2,729

61. Have you ever peed in the woods? 

Probably

62. Do you still watch cartoons? 

Yes

63. Do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

Neither?

64. Favorite dipping sauce? 

Szechuan

65. What do you wear to bed? 

Underwear or pajama pants

66. Have you ever won a spelling bee?

Nope

67. What are your hobbies?

Origami, cooking, reading manga

68. Can you draw? 

Not really

69. Do you play an instrument?

Nope

70. What was the last concert you saw? 

I went to a music festival called Buku

71. Tea or coffee?

Tea

72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

Dunkin

73. Do you want to get married?

Eventually

74. What is your crush’s first and last initial?

ID lulz

75. Are you going to change your last name when you get married? 

Nah son

76. What color looks best on you? 

Black

77. Do you miss anyone right now? 

No

78. Do you sleep with your door open or closed?

Closed?

79. Do you believe in ghosts?

No

80. What is your biggest pet peeve? 

Um. Maybe when people chew with their mouths open.

81. Last person you called`

My room mate

82. Favorite ice cream flavor? 

Mint chocolate chip

83. Regular oreos or golden oreos? 

Regular

84. Chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? 

Chocolate

85. What shirt are you wearing? 

Long sleeved tan one

86. What is your phone background?

The one that it came with

86. Are you outgoing or shy?

Shyer

87. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

It’s nice

88. Do you like your neighbors? 

Yah

89. Do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

When I shower. Like a fucking heathen

80. Have you ever been high? 

I’ve never touched the Devil’s lettuce

91. Have you ever been drunk? 

The Devil’s piss water has never been in contact with my chaste lips

92. Last thing you ate? 

Some very very mediocre margarine bathed chicken piccata with shite fettuccine.

93. Favorite lyrics right now

Idk

94. Summer or winter? 

Winter

95. Day or night? 

Night

96. Dark, milk, or white chocolate? 

Milk/ Dark

97. Favorite month? 

October

98. What is your zodiac sign

Libra

100. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

I have no idea