#idc if there is pride events or anything that weekend you also have to go vote

[anamelessfacelessnerd]

s1 Jonmartimsasha Polycule headcannons (NSFW under the cut)

Tim is the tallest at 6’3, Martin is 6’, Sasha is 5’10, and Jon is the shortest at 5’7

Martin is the first one to say “I love you” to all of them. Tim and Sasha has said it to each other before, as they were together before the polycule got together, but not to the entire group.

They’re all really into board games. Sasha and Jon get super competitive, so much so that they don’t even notice Martin and Tim teaming up to beat them.

They all love music. Any kind of music really. Sometimes they tease each other about the kind of music they listen to, but they will listen to it anyway because music is a great way to understand the deepest corners of someone’s heart and mind. (If they were all alive and well in 2021 they would go HARD to drivers license)

They love dancing too. They have dance parties in their living room all the time. Tim was an assistant dance teacher at his local community center throughout most of university, so he teaches them to salsa and swing dance and ballroom dance and so much more. Jon was a bit grumpy about it in the beginning, but now he’s really good at dancing.

They usually share a bed, but they do have a second bedroom as well for guests if they have them or if one of them is sick or just doesn’t want to share the bed that night. Everyone thought it would be Jon who used it most often, but it’s actually Sasha. In fact, Jon only uses it when he’s contagious.

Sometimes Sasha will go to sleep in the spare bed, then get lonely or cold during the night and have to rejoin the “boy pile” as she calls it.

Jon is basically a clingy cat. He can’t resist cuddles, naps, and warms rays of sunshine. He may even purr if you play with his hair.

Jon is tiny and all the others can and do pick him up, sometimes just to mess with him.

Sasha has an undercut and the boys take turns choosing what color to dye it. Tim actively tries to pick the mose outlandish and funky colors. Martin spends a lot of time thinking about her hair color, skin tone, and the colors of her clothing before he picks a color that would go well with everything. Jon always forgets until they’re in the store so he just picks the first color that speaks to him, and it usually ends up being Sasha’s favorite.

They convinced Jon to dye one of his grey streaks purple once. He really liked it but Elias gave him dirty looks until it faded.

Once when they had all gotten a bit drunk, Tim convinced them all to get matching tatoos. They decided on each getting the symbol for a different suit of playing cards on their ankles. Martin got a heart, Tim got a diamond, Sasha got a club, and Jon got a spade.

Legally they couldn’t get married but after a while they start calling each other their spouses and they even get wedding bands.

They have an elderly long haired cat named “Sargent Fuzzypaws” or “Sarge” for short.

They have weekly movie nights where they take turns picking movies. Martin likes sci-fi and fantasy, Tim likes classic B horror movies, and Sasha likes period dramas or superhero movies. Jon makes them watch documentaries at first, but once he is comfortable that they won’t make fun of him, he reveals his true love of rom coms.

Jon and Sasha are more or less the same clothing size, and they share clothes all the time. Jon especially likes wearing her skirts and dresses. He likes them so much in fact that Tim, Martin, and Sasha buy him some for his birthday.

Jon and Sasha also love to steal Martin and Tim’s clothes because they’re big and comfy.

Every weekend they go out on a date that they take turns planning. Martin tends to take them on walks in the park and nice picnics. Tim drags them to clubs whenever he can (he claims it keeps them young), but will bring them to a pub instead if they’re not feeling a club that night. Jon likes to plan day trips to Calais. It’s a long drive (about 3hrs each way), but they don’t mind as long as they’re spending time together. Sasha plans these fun guided tours of musesums, historical events, old warships, “haunted” buildings and whatnot.

Jon doesn’t have his drivers license. Tim does but he’s a terrible driver, he speeds, he takes turns to sharp, and he practically gives the rest of them a heart attack every time. Sasha and Martin are the only good drivers.

Sasha and Martin were the ones who decorated the flat. Tim’s still a frat boy at heart and after seeing his old apartment, all three of the others decided that he couldn’t help them decorate. He didn’t really mind until they made him throw out his rainbow monster energy can display (“But Sasha, it’s a rainbow! We’re gay! It fits perfectly!” “Idc Tim, it’s ugly”). Jon’s taste was a little too dark for the rest of them. They spent the majority of the week days in a dark basement, they needed a bright and colorful place to come home to.

They all think they’re being really subtle when they first start out, but everyone knows right away. Elias considers talking to them about it, as a relationship between archival staff is strictly against the employee handbook (that he wrote of course) but then decided to leave it be as the closer they are, the easier it will be to use one to manipulate the others.

They have pride flags all over the apartment. Pan, bi, ace, poly, the classic rainbow flag, they even have duplicates of some of them.

Tim is incapable of not buying anything rainbow that he sees. Everytime he goes out for groceries he comes back with balloons, or a rainbow bouquet, or more likely, some sort of candy with rainbow packaging.

Speaking of bouquets, Martin loves buying them flowers. He does it all the time. He’ll pick them up on the way home or even have them sent to the institute, anything to bring a smile to their faces.

The group dynamic changes so much based on who’s hanging out with who. Here is a handy chart:

Jon is pretty sex neutral. He doesn’t tend to engage, but he usually likes to watch or just be in the same room. Sometime he sits with them on the bed and kisses/touches them, though he rarely wants to be touched.

When he does want to be touched, the others spend hours taking him apart completely.

He does love kissing and making out though. Martin in particular loves making out with Jon. Jon will often get him worked up and then turn him over to Sasha and Tim to take care of the rest.

Tim and Martin get so horny when they’re alone together. Tim’s a literal sex god and he loves groping Martin and whispering dirty things in his ear to work him up. Sasha does this to the two of them as well, though not as much as Tim.

When Martin tops he’s sweet and gentle until he gets close, then he pounds in mercilessly.

Sasha’s rough the whole time. She slaps them and bites them and calls them names the whole time.

Tim’s really good at dirty talk. He’ll lean down and whisper beautiful yet filthy things in their ear until they come

Jon is king of aftercare. He’s become so in tune with his lovers’ bodies that he always knows exactly when to put the kettle on in order to have warm tea waiting for when they finish.