#idk ok i just dont like the idea that they still cant have their eternal beach episodes yet

[solcarow]

.

[sexhaver]

i wanna prod at ur catholic confession post actually. like yes, murder and child rape is obviously bad and there is an inherent problem with how the catholic church shields abusers. but i think removing some of the restrictions of what a priest can or cannot say about a confession could cause some problems. like, for example, how a lot of priests considerer LGBT people to be child abusers/predatory! hypothetically if the cath church made it so preists could openly condemn confessions guilty of child abuse, and if the church considers identifying as LGBT as child abuse, then that could cause problems if someone confessed to IDing as gay/trans. or alternatively, what if someone confesses to killing a rapist/sexual abuser. a priest could use that confession to testify against them and get them imprisoned. is it ok to imprison people for murdering their abusers? idk, but i dont like the idea of the catholic church having that power having a blanket statement that priests cant mention ANY confessions makes it *slightly* more immune to corruption IMO. obviously i dont think this solution is perfect, but my alternative would be to dissolve the catholic church entirely, and i dont think thats happening anytime soon.

well as you point out there isn't really a good solution to this, and that is because the idea of confession is inherently dumb as fuck. everything the catholic church considers a sin falls into one of three categories:

failing to be pious enough (forgetting to pray, missing church, taking the Lord's name in vain). keeping these secret is fine because they aren't, like, actual crimes, and in small + devout enough communities there are definitely priests who would gossip about to their neighbors if not for the confessional seal.

really cool and good activities that are only an issue if you were raised to believe that they would send you to eternal neverending torture after death (jacking off, being gay, having premarital sex, getting/considering an abortion). these should obviously be kept secret because they're embarrassing and potentially dangerous. however, this is kind of a moot point, because any decent person (priest or otherwise) would understand this without needing a confessional seal making it official. so these need the seal to stop the average priest from tattling to a kid's parents when they confide in them.

actual literal crimes with prison sentences and everything (rape, murder, manslaughter, assault). you should not be telling anyone about these if you can help it. what the fuck guys. this isn't even an ethics thing, this is a "don't be fucking stupid" thing. if you murdered your abuser and got away with it, good for you! now shut the fuck up about it because murder is still illegal. is the guilt eating you alive so badly that you need absolution from God about it (cringe)? do what Protestants figured out centuries ago and cut the middleman out of the equation by talking to the J.C. directly via personal prayer! yes i am aware this is heretical. if you care about heresy more than getting caught you are stupid.

so looking at the three points above, the best argument in favor of confessional seal that i can formulate is "sure, it allows murderers and abusers to literally have their actions condoned by God with the explicit guarantee of never being held legally accountable or even changing their behavior (just say a few Hail Maries), but think about the consequences of removing it! priests would be even MORE bigoted than they already are! some of them might even GOSSIP!" like hm, okay, i hear you, you make some excellent points, i think we should nuke the Vatican

[sukifoof-art]

i finally got around to reading over heaven.............

some Thoughts below

ok so it seems like not a lot of people like over heaven for some reason?? i think that ive heard they think dio is ooc but i actually think it fits him pretty well. anyway here are some of my Thoughts on it (spoilers, parent death tw, death tw in general)

- dio doesnt hate his mom, obviously. thats made Very clear through most things that he does, and even in the way he talks about her, despite him saying that he was relieved she died. dio has always been a liar, and this time hes trying to fool himself. he just cant deal with her death, and hes just angry that she wouldnt let him stand up for her. hes basically stuck in this eternally angry state of having nothing resolved, because he cant bring her back. thats why he wasnt satisfied when he killed dario, it still doesnt bring his mom back. he cant prove that he was “right” to her, he cant admit that he loves her, and he cant keep her from being “foolish” because shes dead and theres nothing he can do about it, so instead of just admitting that he loves his mom, hes pretending he doesnt so he doesnt have to deal with the reality of her death. when he lost her its like he lost anything good that he saw in the world, so whats the point of admitting that he loves her now, when love would just hurt him?? god i keep thinking about his dramatic “i was burned by the goddess of love” thing hes so ridiculous

- dio cant admit that he thinks his mom went to heaven either because hes trying to protect himself from getting hurt. everything dio does is for the sake of protecting himself, including his emotions and even his stand. the world itself protects him from being hurt from something unseen, as he can prevent anything bad from happening if he pauses time. the one thing that really hurt him was his mothers death, and if he thinks shes in heaven only to find out she isnt, he might just break apart. thats why he said that maybe dario was in heaven. he has to think of the worst possible scenario because if he gets his hopes up, his heart will be broken all over again. its not that he hates her or believes she was too “foolish” to get to heaven, its that he doesnt wanna have to grieve for her all over again :(:(

- VERY glad someone else is upset about that thing speedwagon said to him,,,, even if its just dio himself,,,, no one is Born Evil and to think that something like that could have been what pushed dio to become a vampire............. ooo im gonna attack someone with my hands. anyway i think that maybe dio thought that he still had a chance to get to heaven at that point, as he believed all of his murders were just what he “had” to do. he really believed he had no choice, and so it was fine, he could still get to heaven and be with his mother. but speedwagon asserting that he was born evil seemed to make all of his misdeeds Very real for him, and so he would rather become a vampire and live forever than die, go to hell, and never see his mother ever again. he doesnt say anything like this i dont think, but following his thinking if u look past the way he lies every two seconds, this is probably what ran through his head.

- he only called his mother something Other than mother twice, and it was “mommy” and “mom” and something about it just,,, Breaks My Heart,, i dont know why but that just. Gets Me u know?? i really dont think dio felt like dealing with jotaro and the rest, and i really believe that if he could have, he probably would have saved holly. he was obsessed with the idea of Holy Women, and holly, being a mother and a “holy woman”, knowing she was going to die was probably like reliving his mothers death in a way. it was weird to see him come to some sort of breaking point where he just called out for his mother.... the “mother. mother. mom.” page GOT me i cant Deal with this i am going to Cry

- his reasoning for what he needs to get to heaven is. So Incredibly Strange. not to mention the 14 words that he needs are just from a lullaby his mom sang to him?? i dont think his heaven was seeing the future or anything like that, it was just seeing his mom again, but as stated before, he cant get his hopes up or he’ll just fully pass away or smth idk. i was always upset that the part where dario yells at him to sell his mothers death goes by so quickly in the anime, you can barely tell that thats when dio decided he needed to kill dario. its much clearer in the manga but not many people like phantom blood so............... that Very Big Part of dios character is just kind of. overlooked by most people i think

- this man will NOT shut up about how much he loves hol horse oh my GOD

okay that is all. anyone please talk to me about over heaven i am going to be thinking about it for years. i am Begging i think about dio and his mom So Much,

[justanotherpersonsuniverse]

1st of all, amazing chapter cap. I woke up from a nap to see the email telling me it updated and it was amazing.

2nd, fuck you. How dare you not tell us who Grim is, I feel betrayed. But like also great story telling, kagami wouldn't know who the fuck they are because shes not around much. But still, fuck you.

3rd, early congrats on 1k kudos for Panthera, you deserve it. Your writing is amazing and you deserve all the kudos on ao3.

Alright I'm done with the numbers ima start theorizing now.

The identity of Grim

So my first point is that Kagami didn't know who they were, or at least not their name. This eliminates the gang(we sorta knew it wasn't any of them, but I kept them in mind because idk what kinda shit you were gonna pull), and Luka. Obviously it's not Marinete and Adrien because dramatic irony and shit so that leaves a few people.

Namely; Ivan, Mylene, Max, Kim, Nathaniel, Rose, Marc, Mireille, and Lila.

Ima start by eliminating a few of these.

Kagami never had a chance to meet or see Lila, I doubt it's her.

I doubt Kagami wouldn't know Rose's name. With how much the rest of the game makes fun of Juleka and now much Rose would talk about Juleka, Kagami definently would have picked up the girl's name.

Similarly, I think Mylene can be eliminated in a similar fashion. Kagami hangs around Marinette in cat form a lot and, going by Marinette's character, Marinette totally would have told this cat about her little best friend's squad. Kagami also would have seen pictures of Mylene(and Rose) around Marinette's room and probably learned their names. So I think I can safely eliminate Mylene(and rose again)

Reverser happens after queens battle, so nobody except Marinette has met Marc yet, so I think he can be safely eliminated.

The Grim's saying 'spooky spooky ghost realm' makes me think it's not Max, he doesnt talk like that. Also I doubt he would get excited like that when Kagami said that they were friends.

The fact that Grim knows Luka eliminates Mireille. Mireille wouldn't know Luka, or most of the class.

So, my final list of possibilities is Ivan, Kim, and Nathaniel.

I personally cant see it being Ivan. It doesn't make any sense to me, plus it would destroy my theory of Ivan and Mylene having some magical shenanigans going on together. Ima set ivan aside since I personally dont think its him. I have no evidence to back this claim, I simply dont think it makes sense story wise.

Kim is a possibility, but I think his general vibe denies him being 'psychopomp doggo to the Eternal Graveyard'. That's just my opinion though and I have no evidence to support or deny him being Grim.

Nathaniel, out of the final 3, seems like the most likely. Man looks tired and traumatized, maybe from seeing so many dead kids. He would also totally get a little excited at a new friend because the boy's kinda lonely, especially with his bestie Alix constantly hanging out with her totally-not-werewolf-girlfriend Chloe so often. But I still think he's the Haunted so idk.

Ok so none of the final options make sense, so lets go back to the ones I eliminated.

Starting with Max, he is injured I'm the miracuclass artwork you posted and Grim was just injured. Also his personality would totally fit a graveyard psychopomp creature. However, as I said before, the speach patterns dont match up.

Mylene is a possibility because my elimination method for her was full of assumptions and guesses and could be totally wrong. But also shes a sniveling coward and I doubt she could fight an evil spirit while guiding a dead kid to a graveyard without bursting out into tears and running away and Grim seemed supremely chill with the whole dead kid thing. So lets leave Mylene alone for now.

Rose, seemingly the most obvious choice and therefore totally is not Grim. While her irises look white in the miracuclass artwork and the grape ice cream thing in the date chapter happened, I think these are both red herrings. In the new chapter Kagami says the Grim had human eyes after they undoggified(is that the word?). Implying that their eyes looked normal, no supernatural aspects about them. Also the grape ice cream thing must be a total red herring because, its Rose of course she would be distressed by cute doggies dying. Also the rebirth grape thing is probably the better clue for what Rose is, but ima not get into that right now.

That's it, that's all I got. This ask got really long.

So in conclusion; it's not Rose, Max, Marc, Lila, or Mireille. Everyone else is up in the air. I have no idea. Cap is playing jedi mind tricks on us. Someone free our souls from this frog's grasp.

That's it, analysis over.

Let me make this worse for you

Kagami does know the Grim’s name now and who they are, sorry for the confusion for a line that might’ve said other wise, Kagami has met them, Kagami has a name for them now.

Mylene isn’t a coward neither here nor in canon, she’s just socially shy.

And as I quote from my Traits post “Like I don’t think I’d write this in into the fic but when drawing like-” meaning I wouldn’t acknowledge these consistent traits outright in the fic but when drawing they’d be there.

Hope this makes things worse for you! :D

[kvgehiras]

waaaa i'm sure whatever you have typed up is great!! if you ever decide to post it, i'll look forward to it ♡

cough cough SO UM,,, ik this is oddly specific but i hope you don't mind aha .. a character of your choice with someone who has some important exams coming up soon, maybe?? i've like ... procrastinated like all of my work and slept through the entire few weeks before,, so i'm currently on the brink of eternal sleep (my fault, wholly, really) i don't mind who, just pick your favourite/s!!

thank you in advance!! qwq

hello again anon!! THANK U AAAA i might post it after the current event ends bcs im busy grinding lately lol but i will post it soon so i hope u like it ehe ;; as for ur schedule PLS SLEEP !!!! i do know the feeling off not doing any of ur work nd just resting but sometimes it's ok anon! studying when ur not feeling like it will only feel like a chore nd u probably wont be able to retain any of it. so study when u want to, bcs while exams r important, so r u hehe <3 anyways here r the charas!! wrote a lil scenario for mika, leo, nd rei!! hope u like it <3

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

KAGEHIRA MIKA

• mika overworks himself alot, mainly bcs he just wants to prove, to himself and others, that he is worthy of being a part of valkyrie

• but he still likes being a lil spoon when yall r cuddling (o˘◡˘o)

• while he is a powerful artist when hes on stage, he just melts when hes in ur arms yk!!!!

• so he doesnt mind it when lately u seem to be slacking off a bit more than usual bcs he gets more cuddles from u !!!!! #mika1stwin

• but when u suddenly stop out of nowhere nd even refuse to come out of ur room at times bcs uve procrastinated ur work too much nd if u do not finish going through ur material then ur doomed to fail nd oh lord-

• "(y/n)?"

• u look up at ur bf nd hes standing beside u- w his stuff in his hands.....?

• "ah ya see.....ya've been lookin' a lil stressed lately so i thought abt.....helpin' u like this! idk what is troublin' ya, but im here to always listen! :D"

• u break into a grin, one mika had missed so much, nd grab his cheeks to plant a kiss on his cheek

• nd still keeping ur hands where they are, u pull away to look at his bright red face

• "thank u mika... ill always be here for u too, ok?"

• nd he quickly nods, scared to meet ur eyes, esp bcs of the close proximity of ur faces rn

• what a lil baby

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

TSUKINAGA LEO

• leo is honestly the last person u want to see when ur trying to finish learning ur material,,,that too in a rush

• like!!!!! u love him u rlly do but this bitch will start doodling abt his inspiration nd all nd ur brain just cant focus yk

• that, nd also that if u dont give him Any attention At All he will literally wither away nd basically refuse to sleep nd WILL stare at u till u give him kissies (nd he alrdy doesnt sleep enough........ sigh)

• so when he wakes up in the middle of the night (the one night u managed to somehow get him to bed) nd doesnt see u in the room a part of him panics

• he quickly calls out for u nd when he hears u respond from the study room, he opens the door to see u slowly turn around from ur chair, tired, shoulders slumped over

• immediately rushing over, leo tightly wraps u in a hug, a hand running through ur hair

• "(Y/N)!!!!!!!!! WHERE WERE U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I THOUGHT THE ALIENS KIDNAPPED U!!!!?!!???!!!!!!! DONT LEAVE ME AGAINNNNNN ｡･ﾟﾟ*(>д<)*ﾟﾟ･｡!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

• "leo it's 2 am.......nd also i didn't leave u, u know? im right here!"

• the exhaustion was very evident in ur voice, so much so that leo pulled away only to squint his eyes at u nd go "r u not ok? u sound tired ...... gasp r u DYING????????? NOOOOO U CANT DIE UR MY INSPIRATION!!!!!!!!"

• "leo thats v sweet nd while yes i Am dying im not leaving u it's ok"

• leo smiles, which turns into a grin, nd then he suddenly gasps again nd oh lord what idea is it this time

• "(y/n)!!!!! how abt i sleep here????????"

• ".....huh?"

• "YEA!!!!!! didn't u leave that room so u wouldn't disturb me?????? but im lonely so......ill just sleep on ur lap then, ok? ok! good nightttt!!!!!!!!"

• nd then he places his head on ur lap, the other half on his body relying on the chair he was previously sitting on for support

• while he isnt wrong abt the disturbance part.....he does look content here.......nd he does feel lonely so ......

• mayb u just gotta learn today what u can wing everything at this point...... it's gonna be ok . probably....?

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

SAKUMA REI

• unlike the other two, rei wouldn't even have to guess that ur not doing ok, he would just Know

• nd what does he do to help? flirt w u nd get u to let him teach u obv!

• he Knows it's not rlly teaching, nd so do u, but what can u do when he looks at u w those puppy eyes of his, nd says that he'll do anything nd everything in his power to always help u

• so when he does take in whatever u have to study he..... he realises he's Also bad at this

• good job rei rlly helps out a ton!

• anyways to make up for it, nd also stick w his promise to help u, he tells u to go through the material, nd explain it to him! he heard somewhere that it works bcs it forces u to rlly understand the concept instead of memorising it nd u think it should work

• but oh god how is it supposed to work when rei keeps looking at u w stars in his eyes, nd his hand suddenly grabs urs nd he circles his thumb on the back of ur hand nd IS HE FLIRTING IN THE MIDDLE OF A STUDY SESSION

• rei playfully quirks an eyebrow when he sees u get flustered nd just . lay ur head on the table w sigh nd just whine

• "REIIIIIIIII I HAVE TO STUDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

• he chuckles bcs he does realise what hes doing to u nd honestly he loves ur reactions so he keeps doing it

• "fufufu.....sorry love, i'll be quiet now. go on, do ur thing." (liar!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ur too flirty for a study session!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

• tip : never keep him in the same room as u when u have work to do . keeps flirting . too much distraction .

• ratings : 200/10 . the additional 200 points is bcs hes too cute to say no....... god he rlly has u wrapped around his finger huh

[khaleesiofalicante]

OH MY GOD! ITS HAPPENING! Its only the summary and I’m emo 😂 I should be studying for my exams, but I have tomorrow for that ;)

Ok, lets do this:

UDHWIJSHW THEY ARE SO CUTE FOR EACH OTHER I CANT-

"He preferred to hide his heart away. But he couldn’t hide David. He didn’t want to. David deserved to be seen." Like father like son. Both speeking poetry about their love ones. (and no, Idk which father I'm talking about 😂)

“I don’t think they are fake dating,” David hummed from the other end. “You don’t talk for hours every night if you are just fake dating.” (THANK YOU DAVID! SOMEONE THAT ITS NOT BLIND)

"They like doing chores. Let them do it. They fight demons all day and then come home and do chores. I feel like it’s their form of therapy. They need this.”“So, by not helping them, we are technically helping them?” Bapa had asked and Max had nodded with a grin. “Shadowhunters are weird.” “True dat,” Max had laughed. They were all weirdos. But Max loved them anyway. He loved his weird shadowhunters. (The domesticity lf this is killing me in a good way🥺)

“Will you on a date with me? Tomorrow?” Max asked then – because why the hell not. (Hell yeah Max. Go big or go home babe😎)

“This date is going to be the best first date in the history of first of dates.” In retrospect, he really shouldn’t have said that. (I'm already feeling his chaotic ass will do something like Magnus did, but lets keep hope)

"Maybe Lexi and Liv would probably enjoy a date – a fake date - in the arcade." Could I be more in love with both of them?? Is that physically possible?? 💙

Elyaas giving Max dating advice!! Lmaooo 😂😂

"His parents would not be pleased if they knew Max was summoning demons for relationship advice. But they had also encouraged Max to make friends with everyone regardless of their identity. So, technically this was their fault. They gave him very mixed messages."  YOU LIL SHIT. YOU ARE NOT WRONG THO...

FUCK. An attack??

You lil shit Max.

Yep, Rafael has to deal with it everyday 😂

OOMG YESS. THE ALIANCE RUNE!!

"So, when he got tired, he would simply fix the problem by eating. It was a win-win to be honest." I feel like I should say something, but tbh it makes sense

Ok, this fight is intense

Wait. Anjali is there???  What?

Oh ok, it wasn’t

“Say the thing!”Rafael groaned and raised his hands, the alliance rune lighting up.“I’m not just a shadowhunter,” Rafael said through gritted teeth. “I’m Magnus Bane’s son.” I'm dead 😂

THAT SCENE WAS EVERYTHING. LOVE THOSE TWO

“Well, demons are stupid,” Max pointed out. “Yeah, that makes sense,” Rafael said with a mouthful of food. “You are half demon after all.” “Asshole,” Max laughed and punched his brother.

“Text dad we are okay,” Rafael said, slowly recovering. “They will worry.”Max nodded and did that. (This just summ up sibling relationships so well *chef kiss*)

“It can be hard, Max. Bapak and dad…Sometimes I look at them and feel like I will never have what they have.” YUP. THEY HAVE SIBLINGS DYNAMIC. ALSO RAFAEL IS JUST 🥺🥺🥺

David got wounded???

Oh ok. False alarm.

Rafael sat down next to him and put Bapak’s head on his lap, gently massaging it.

“Are you okay?” dad knelt down next to his husband. “Just a little tired,” Bapak replied.A little tired. Max knew Bapak was fucking exhausted."  "Bapak never showed it. He never complained. Max wondered what else he hid away from everyone else." “Okay,” dad whispered and kissed his husband on the head. “Get some rest, my love.” Bapak nodded and closed his eyes as Rafael hummed something softly. (Well, now I'm crying 😭😭)

" His niece found an herbal medication that helps with the pain.” ANJALI!! I LOVE HER💙💙

"Dad finally smiled and went out to the balcony, phone in hand. He seemed to hang out in the balcony a lot lately" No no no. I dont like this. Babe find a better copying mechanism!!

"Bapak smiled then. A brilliant grin. The one dad probably fell in love with." jsyeihdiej I cant🥺💙

"Bapak sniffed when dad sat down next to him and gave him an odd look. But he didn’t say anything." Magnus tell him something. I dont like where this is going😭

“Does that mean Bapak is a capitalist?” Max asked. “Do not drag me into this!” Bapak protested and dad laughed at that" Ahh yess. Typical family discussions 😂

"David: Mr Herondale yelled “Yes! Two out of three!” (😂😂 I HONESTLY LAUGHED WAY TO HARD!!)

“Well, no! I don’t want drama. But I want you to be dramatic so I can tell you not to be dramatic!” I would like to say WHAT? but I honestly get it 😂

“Also, we all know you had an embarrassing crush on Uncle Jace growing up,” Rafael snickered. “And you definitely still have a crush on Uncle Jem.” Oh god 😂😂 but I mean... Who doesn't have a crush on Jem?

“Oh yeah?” Max demanded. “Well then let me explain your type. You are probably going to fall for someone who is like a combination of Aunt Izzy and Aunt Lily! Some femme fatale type who is a heartbreaker and looks like a supermodel and-” Boy got it right huh? 😂

“You two are dating?” dad demanded. “Since when? Who else knows about this? Why didn’t you tell us before? Were you dating when you were in London? Magnus, did you know about this?” “There you go!” Max yelled triumphantly. “That’s the dramatic reaction I was looking for. Thanks, dad!” lmaooo 😂😂

"And that’s how the next hour turned out to be the most painful and most embarrassing hour of his life." I. I have no words

“I’ll have you know this conversation utterly traumatized me. I demand financial compensation.” “Not happening,” dad said into his coffee, and Max groaned before walking back into his room. (THAT FAMILY 😂😂)

" I tried to hurt your father once.” OH no, the angst is coming

" He didn’t know about this. He knew about their story. Everyone did. The accords hall kiss. The fight in Edom. The changing of the law. Their love was legendary. Not this!" THIS IS BRINGING BACK SO MANY FLASHBACKS

“All I know is that I was terrified. I love your father. I love Magnus more than anything in the world. And I didn’t want to lose him. And I didn’t know what to do.” 😭😭 NOT AGAIN!!

"When you love someone so much, sometimes you do crazy things.” THIS

" Love had made a fool out of them. Love had made them blind." Yup. tsc: a summary

"When you love someone, you have to be honest with them" And THAT is character development!!

"They called it The Jem effect." I'm using this from now on 😂💙💙

"Uncle Jem was wearing a tank top and and ripped jeans." So its time for SIMP over Jem Carstairs? Okey then.

"In fact, he used to have a crush on both Tessa and Jem. It’s how he had found he was bisexual." Same here 😂

“MINA! I SWEAR TO LILITH I AM GOING TO GET YOU BACK FOR THIS!” OH MY GOD I LOVE MINA!!

“In my defense, I was busy!!” “Oooo, someone has been getting busy!” Mina WINKED. (You lil shit! I love her 💙)

He didn’t know he could blush!!!

" They had gone to hell and back for Roman. It wouldn’t have been possible if not for Catarina. She was, and always has been, a miracle worker." Again, I love my queen💙💙

“I believe in Mavid supremacy.” ME TOO

"There is something so queer about Ferris wheels!" Someone needed to say this

"They had their own space in the spiral fucking labyrinth. These fucking legends." I BELIEVE IN WARLOCK TEAM SUPREMACY

"But Ragnor had always had a soft spot for Rafael." 🥺🥺

I love my warlock squad so much I cant-

Ragnor is so done😂

“I don’t want to lose him,” Max said it out loud for the first time. “But you will, Max,” Catarina said gently. “Everyone loses people they love. Every day. It’s how life works.” (its to early to be crying)

“Yes, we do,” Ragnor replied. “But it also means we fall in love over and over. Century after century. It’s our blessing.” (these warlocks are just to perfect)

“And that love is going to last for a lifetime,” Tessa said softly. “Can you imagine that? Someone loving you for centuries. Someone remembering you for eternity. Doesn’t that sound wonderful?” 🥺🥺

David deserved to be loved like that – endlessly and impossibly. (OK BUT THE PARALLEL)

Tessa should definetly write a guidebook

“Je t’aime à la folie,” Max said.David’s eyes widened. “Vraiment?“ "Je t’aime. Je t’aime de toute mon âme. Je t’aime pour toujours.” ( I literally screamed and woke up my sister, I just love them so much!!!)

"David smiled. The smile Max fell in love with" 🥺🥺

“I know I am not your forever and I am okay with that.” Max bit his lip. “Okay.” “But you are mine,” David said. “You know that, right?” (ksidjdldk its just all this was beautiful!)

“I got it all planned,” Max said – for someone who had no idea what he was going to do." (Me as I should be studying 😂)

" And you were just scared. You were just a kid." “I just…I just realized you might not have had that when you were growing up – that there might not have been people you could talk to about these things.” THAT!! LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!

"Max pulled him closer and kissed him again. Every kiss a promise. A promise to love. A promise to fight. A promise to survive" I would die for this two

OMG he took him to the Celestial Palace!! Thats so perfect and 🥺🥺

“Oh mon dieu! Ceci est incroyable! Il y a tellement de livres! Oh mon dieu! Je l'aime tellement!”💙💙 Idk how you manage to make me love David even more

“Of course he doesn’t hate you!” Max chuckled. “But he did say he will put your nerd ass in the silent city if you don’t bring me home by 11.” David blinked. “You’re joking, right?” “Of course,” Max grinned. His father had actually said that but there was no need to scary poor David any further. (😂😂 Imagine having the Consul as father-in-law, poor David)

“Yeah, not good with words my ass,” Exactly!! They say they are not good with words and procede to recite poetry of their love one??!!

Ughh I love this chapter so much and I loved how they deal with the inmortality thing! I just love when people comunicate and talk to each other! THATS A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP! And how they didn't repeat Alec and Magnus mistake. I just love it! *chef kiss*

Anyway, this was really long and it took to open notes to fullfill, so i'll just leave💙💙

Bro I just felt like I read the whole chapter again and I am feels. I AM FEELS SEND HELP. Not me catching feels over my own shit lmaooooo.

Thank you so much. I have some work to do and I was like meh and now I have some energy to do it lol. I hope you spend tomorrow studying! You better!! Good luck!

ps - I love you notice the parallels and references. It makes me lil heart go boop!

also why do I feel like y'all are eternally doing exams????

[daxieoclock]

ok shay you dont understand i was literally scrambling through our messages on discord to find a dissidia link and now i cant pick between the kairi reunion with sora and the namixi bed sharing scene so you gotta pick for me

jdhfbghjgb Enu you absolute sweetheart thank you for the ask

they’re both kinda short scenes though sooooo por que no los dos djhfgbjh

Kairi reunion scene is in chapter 10 and the Namixi scene is in chapter 14

She'd only been there twice before, both times after Xehanort's defeat, but Kairi instantly recognized Terra, Aqua and Ventus's home: the quintuple towers and golden chains of the Land of Departure.

I don’t remember if I ever articulated what both of those times were in my head, but it’s a HC that just felt right hehe.

And there, sitting on the bottom steps leading up to the front door, was Sora.

He hopped up as soon as he saw her, that stupid grin all over his face, and then Kairi's eyes blurred over and her feet pounding against the stone courtyard.

"It's so good–" he said, and she cut him off by punching him as hard as she possibly could in the shoulder. "OW!"

Kairi’s anger, frustration and just general emotion is something I had a lot of fun exploring in DKH, and something I definitely want to do more of if I ever return to KH writing (still undecided on that). As much as I love the comedy beat of the pissed-off reunion, it’s an honest feeling I think, to be both overjoyed and infuriated by someone at the same time. And it definitely fits my interpretation of where Kairi – who has been incessantly damseled, left behind and sacrificed-for – is at this moment in her arc. Furious and bitter and just wanting to drag her dumbass bffs/bfs to safety whether they like it or not.

"It's so good–" he said, and she cut him off by punching him as hard as she possibly could in the shoulder. "OW!"

"You absolute, goddamn, stupid idiot!" Kairi shrieked. "Do you have any idea how worried I was? How worried Riku was?"

For whatever reason this makes me think of the very beginning of the story, with Riku lying awake thinking of Sora. Like...yeah. Yeah he was. And on that note, as much as I missed Sora’s presence in the story, I absolutely loved the chance to expand on Riku and Kairi’s friendship/relationship (it’s complicated; when is it ever not?) without him there. I wanted to emphasize both how much they care about each other, and how much Sora’s absence is felt nearly constantly.

"Probably," Sora said, sheepish, massaging his shoulder.

"We had to try and explain to your parents how you....you vanished into thin air, but how it's actually completely okay because you did it to save my life!"

I don’t know that I’ll ever focus too much on any of the KH characters’ biological families, but I think the Destiny trio are the closest to actually Having Any Sort Of Bond with their parents. We’ve got a vague idea of Kairi’s home life – adopted daughter of the mayor, and I’ve extrapolated her dad is kind of absent – but none of Riku’s and only the fact that Sora has a mom. But the idea of Kairi and Riku returning to the island alone, having to break the news to Sora’s parents, just stuck in my head when I was writing this.

She didn't know who embraced who first. But she was in his arms then, and he was in hers, and she squeezed him so close, so goddamn tightly.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"Just hold me," she said. "Just shut up and hold me."

I think this is just a sweet moment tbh djhfgbj.

"Your hair looks longer," Kairi said, finally. They were sitting on the steps together. Her eyes had cleared, but she wasn't ready to leave this moment. "And you're missing a button on your jacket."

"Oh." Sora ran a hand through his hair in that absentminded way that he did. He laughed. "I hadn't noticed."

Liar. She knew him well enough to know when he was putting on a front, and he definitely was now. But she wasn't much better, she had refused to point out the bags under his eyes, the greyish pallor of his tan skin, the way his blue eyes seemed darker than she remembered. She couldn't speak those details, as if silence would make them go away, as if she could will away the scuff from his shoes and the dullness from the little metal crown that hung around his neck. He reminded her of how Aqua had looked after they'd rescued her, so relieved but yet so exhausted. It was the impact of that much time spent alone, that much time spent wandering, spent lost and far away from the ones you love. Kairi's grip on Sora's hand tightened.

I will never forgive Nomura’s cowardice to not show the physical, kinda traumatizing toll that years of isolation in the RoD took on Aqua. 0.8 delved into it slightly, but only in the most surface-level way. And judging by what we’ve seen from Re:Mind and MoM, the same sort of surface-level emotion is going to be applied to Sora’s ‘death’ as well. He’s almost definitely going to come out of a YEAR of complete isolation being just as chipper and bright-eyed as he’s always been, and that is something I wanted to rectify here.

I love the KH cast and I love seeing them challenged, and love watching them grow. There’s not quite enough Sora in DKH to grasp the full extent of how he’s changed after his ‘death,’ but I’d like to think we do see that he HAS changed. It’s something I touched on more directly during Riku’s reunion with Sora, but it’s present here as well.

"So, who's your friend?" He motioned with his head towards the Spirit-Namine, who sat patiently on her haunches.

"Sora, it's me," she said with a little laugh. "It's Namine."

"Oh." Sora stared at the Spirit-Namine for a moment, the gears straining in his head, and then he looked over his shoulder up the stairs, then back at her with a confused expression on his face. "Wait, weren't you sleeping inside? Why are you here and a cat? How are you here and a cat?"

But of course, even after that sort of trauma, Sora is still Sora. He’s still a goober and a softie, and I didn’t want to abandon those traits for the sake of angst.

Sora had never been very comfortable with silence, she noticed him starting to shift and adjust next to her.

ADHD Sora rights.

Kairi kept catching herself holding her breath, waiting for him to vanish or the floor to give way or her alarm to wake her up. Waiting for something to drag him away again.

He looked over his shoulder at her and smiled. "I'm not going anywhere, you know," he said.

Kairi spluttered. "What...who...shut up!" She stared at the ground, cheeks flushed, unable to acknowledge out loud that he'd read her so well.

I haven’t decided if Sora’s surprising emotional perceptiveness is a new aspect of his character or something he’s always had that hasn’t been highlighted well, but it’s definitely an interpretation of him I enjoy. Like, yeah, he’s impulsive and inattentive and kind of rude on occasion, but he’s also showed some moments of being able to read people with shocking accuracy. I think that’s a skill some Keyblade wielders have, a sort of magical hyper-empathy, and Sora definitely has it in spades without even trying.

And briefly before we go into Namixi (and speaking OF Namixi)

Xion glanced at Sora and Kairi from the middle chair and threw up a peace sign. "Hey, what's up?" Her outfit had also changed a lot since Kairi saw her last, she had on a pair of loose black cargo shorts and a pullover hoodie, her black hair swept to one side and tucked behind her right ear. Honestly, she looked a lot happier, a lot freer.

Butch Xion is absolutely the hill I will die on this gal is 100% loves girls and presenting in nonconforming ways.

Namine, laying against Xion, her eyes closed and her expression peaceful.

Xion looked down at Namine as she noticed Kairi's stare. "Oh, yeah, I'm uh...keeping her safe? Cause she can't move when doing her spell, and uh, probably more comfortable than laying on this ground or something right?" She forced a laugh. "Yeah."

Namine, who absolutely has ulterior motives: “I’m going to be unconscious while using this spell and I’d rather not wake up sore, so maybe you could hold me while I’m using it? I’d make me feel safer too.”

Xion, who is gay as shit and forgot about the fact this castle has beds in it: “Yes absolutely I will totally hold you for as long as you need Namine wow yes that sounds great I’m on board heck yeah.”

*************

And with that introduction let’s hop right into the dedicated Namixi scene shall we.

Namine heard her door open, then close. She didn't move, just kept staring straight ahead, lying on her side in the bed, her heart beating staccato on the inside of her chest. A quiet bump of collision in the dark.

"Ow!" Xion muttered. "Stupid bed."

No good confession scene is complete with at least a couple comedy beats.

Her eyes probably had to adjust to the dark still, which Namine was thankful for, considering the fact she was probably blushing up a storm at the moment. "Are you okay?" She sounded so concerned, oh light.

Gentlebutch Xion strikes again. I refuse to see her as anything but very polite towards pretty gals (and Namine is very pretty gal in her humble opinion).

"I'm fine," Namine said, quickly. "I just...." She reached out to take Xion's hand, but hesitated, and just let her own fall back onto the mattress. "Wanted to see you, I guess."

"Oh," Xion said. Relief. Namine started when she felt Xion's fingers brushing against her hand. "Shit, sorry, sorry."

"No, no." Namine laughed, and took Xion's hand. "Thank you. This is really nice."

The eternal sapphic dance of being terrified of overstepping and desperate to express your affection at the same time. Also I have said it before and I will say it again: The Gay Gals Love Hands. Idk what it is but sapphic attraction is like 75% hand-holding it’s ridiculous.

Xion opened her eyes again, those gorgeous purple eyes.

Changing characters’ eye color is sort of a running theme in my fics I suppose, though it doesn’t ALWAYS come up. Xion’s purple eyes is something I saw once and got stuck in my brain forever. I have no idea who came up with it or why it’s something that apparently a decent chunk of Xion fans hc for her, but it sure is what we’ve decided on haha.

Three words. That's it. So easy, just three words. Just say it. Say it. "When you found out Sora was here, and decided to go after him." Coward.

Namine, like most of the female cast of KH, has basically no outwards emotion and very little development. For whatever reason, I’ve fixated on an interpretation of her as someone who expresses her emotions in unconventional ways, spends a lot of time overthinking things, protects herself by exaggerating her personality around others while also being terrified of hurting people the way she was forced to hurt Sora. It’s sort of funny to see a very similar personality come up around my interpretations of Haru Okumura in Deja Vu, but Namine definitely expresses her post-trauma identity a lot softer, less formal but still so very careful.

Anyway that’s a lot of words to say that she self-loathes and picks her words incredibly carefully and that contrasts really interestingly with the more impulsive, emotion-driven Xion. They’re a good fit for each other C:

"You can get under the covers too, if you like."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable."

Please stop being a gentlewoman and take the hint. "I want you to," Namine said. Was that too firm? Too bossy?

"Oh!" Xion smiled, and threw the comforter over herself in an instant. Guess it was fine.

More of that aforementioned dynamic.

"This is very good. I'm happy."

"I'm glad," Xion said. "I...like making you happy."

Namine had to inhale deeply at that. It wasn't easy to confess when the girl kept taking her breath away.

I really like the idea in general that it takes so long for Namine to tell Xion how she feels because Xion just keeps doing really sweet things or being kind of romantic but not really making the space for that confession, and Namine just gets flustered and puts it off.

Three words. Just three. Just say them. Namine took a deep breath. "I, uh. I..." She felt a sob welling up in her throat. Light, why was this so difficult, why couldn't she just tell Xion–

Her lips were on hers. Namine couldn't breathe, could barely think for the screaming of her heart in her ears. Xion broke the kiss, looking so very embarrassed. "Sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean–"

Namine reached up and pressed a finger to Xion's lips, cutting her off before she could apologize any more. "Um," she said, "kiss me again?"

And Xion nodded, and Namine let her finger fall, let Xion lean in and kiss her again. And she squeezed her hand so tightly and kissed her back.

So not really a confession but Xion DID get the hint. Once more: Xion’s impulsiveness makes things both very difficult and much easier for Namine. And I think I like the fact that she ends up deciding to just go along with that impulsiveness, just let go of her plan and kiss the gal she’s been pining for, and stop beating herself up about the words she can’t say yet. It’s sweet hehe.

[blondecarfucker]

Bed of Roses (Last Chapter - 21)

Roger Taylor x Reader

BoRhap!Roger Taylor x Reader

Fic Summary: It's 1971. You just moved to London to study, and you find a band on a local pub after a bad date. The encounter doesn’t go the way you expect it, and neither does what follows this evening as you try to deal with loving Roger Taylor.

Fic Note: So I’ve had this story in my head for the last three weeks and finally decided to write it down. It’s completely planned. It will have 21 chapters and it’s divided in three acts: Dusk, Night and Dawn. It’s will be a bit angsty in the future, and it will most likely have some smut as well. I hope you guys enjoy it! Tell me what you think about it in the asks/comments/messages. If this is your first time stumbling upon Bed of Roses, thank you for stopping by! The rest of the story is in my masterlist, the link is in my bio - can't put the link here or else the post will disappear from the tags.

Chapter's notes: THE LAST CHAPTER. I CANT FUCKING BELIEVE. i feel like before i start my thank yous i could give you some weird trivia on the story. i wrote the entire outline for the fic at a weekend shift at work, where i always have free time. i had some smaller ideas - them meeting at a bar and not seeing again, the whole kensingon-taxi-class thing from the beginning - but there was a sudden burst of inspiration and in like twenty minutes the outline was done, and very little has changed, i mostly just added some more details. also, i imagine the reader as alicia silverstone in the 90s?? idk. i just do. also, the reader thing with new york comes from the fact that i lived there for a while and i miss it so much, so thats why theres so much detail about places and stuff - its my form of revisiting my favourite spots there. also, will (REMEMBER WHEN) was written with sebastian stan in mind, and liv tyler (in her lord of the rings days) was poppy. i did too much research for this fic on queen history, and everytime i had to change something (especially in the first act) so the dates made more sense, it KILLED ME.

anyway, now the thank yous: SHIT THIS FIC IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT CHAPTER ON MY LIFE. its my first time writing such a long story without abandoning it, and my first time writing fiction in english, so i learned so much!! i was doing some research the other day, and the great gatsby is like 47k words long, and the first harry potter is around 70k words long - bed of roses is around 60k words long. this is crazy.

it's also my first story to get this many readers interacting with me, and i'm so grateful for you all!! i thought about thanking you all by name, but i dont want anyone to feel left out so i just want every and each one of you reading these words to know: if you read my story, thank you. thank you for giving me your time of the day, thank you for connecting with what i wrote, thank you for telling me in any way possible that you've enjoyed it. thank you. a writer must write, but theres not a lot of joy in talking to an empty room. you filled my small room with warmth and love and there's not enough words to express my gratitude for you all. thank you.

about my writing: i plan on FINALLY DOING THE MANY REQUESTS I HAVE IGNORED OVER THIS FINAL ACT OF BED OF ROSES - requests are still open, too! i'm also outlining a smaller roger x reader fic where she's one of the videographers on the news of the world documentary, so keep an eye out for that! i'm gonna open a permanent taglist for the requests (and eventual new fic), so if you want to be added, hit me up in the ask box/comments/inbox!

anyway i'll finally wrap up this chapter's note cause you have the final chapter to read. enjoy my loves

Words: nearly 4k

Warnings: none??? part of their dialogue is inspired by some of my favourite movies and books like her and the wife and almost famous and before sunrise and the fault in our stars and eternal sunshine of the spotless mind and maybe more I DONT KNOW ITS BEEN AN EMOTIONAL RIDE OK I CANT EVEN REMEMBER WHERE DID I PULL THIS FROM EXACTLY. some errors too cause i didnt revise it completely my bad im crying ok

 ACT 3 - DAWN

"It's the moment night time seems weaker and everything seems easier to figure out"

 Chapter 21

Roger lit a cigarette in the train cabin, and tried to open the top window, the one you can usually pull open.

"Rog, it's not gonna open, you know", you told him as you watched him fiddling with the glass.

"I guess you're right. Hope you won't be bothered by the smoke", he said, taking a puff.

"I won't if you share it with me", you answered, and with a half smile on his lips, Roger lifted the cigarette to your lips, and you breathed in the smoke while looking at him through your lashes.

"Don't look at me like that. Especially if the cigarette smoke is going to leave the cabin sultry and hot", he told you, and you laughed.

"Yeah, and we won't do anything about it", you said, trying to make yourself more comfortable in your seat.

"And why is that?", he asked, batting his lashes innocently at you, you you lightly elbowed his ribs.

"We need to do something else, something we've been ignoring the whole trip", you said, and he raised his brow. "We need to talk about us", you told him, and he breathed out, smoke coming out of his nose.

"I guess you're right again", he said, then slid a bit down on his seat.

You didn't think much about talking about your future with Roger while in Paris, so now has to be the time, on a train that will take you to London and to a whole month of Roger being away, promoting News Of The World.

While in Paris, you never talked to Roger about the future, and talks of the past where subtle - you talked about how you felt with the development Doctor Who took over the years, but didn't think much about the fact that you were separate during years of the show.

You enjoyed the city, but most of all, you enjoyed each other's presence, not only going to museums, churches and castles around you, following them up with fancy dinners and walks along the Seine, but you also spent time inside the room, in your pajamas, ordering take out from restaurants you found on the phone book, having a hard time trying to speak french as Roger tickled the sole of your feet and kept trying to distract you.

You would always remember the peace you felt as you ate cheap chinese food on Roger's shirt on the balcony at night, the Eiffel Tower shining over your meal and Roger's electric blue eyes as he hummed early David Bowie's songs under his breath, or how at home you felt sitting on the couch, Roger on the floor with his head on your lap, his soft strands on your fingers as you tried to braid them while watching re-runs of I Dream of Jenie, Roger focused, trying to understand the french dubbing until he noticed what you were doing.

"Babe, are you trying to braid my hair? Think I'd look better if I'd look more girly?", he said, moving his head back so he can look at you.

"Yeah. Always thought so, but I'll have to keep imagining, since your hair is too short to braid", you pouted, and he laughed.

"Don't you like my new hair, then?", he asked, pouting back, and you moved your head to his level so you could press a quick kiss to his lips.

"I love it, Rog. Especially cause since it's shorter, it looks even messier after I pull it", you said, and he smirked. "My favourite look of yours is when you're all dishevelled after sex", you winked, teasing him.

"That's my favourite, too", he said, turning completely around and pulling you in for a kiss, his hand on the back of your neck.

But now, while in the smoke filled train cabin, you needed to make a few things clear.

"I've been avoiding this for a reason", he said, looking out the window, and you raised your brow, waiting for him to explain. "I have this weird, innate fear of you telling me it's all good but you don't want to see me again, or something", he said, and you gave him a half smile.

"I don't want to do this, Rog. And I won't do it", you told him, and he sighed in relief.

"Even though loving you is a bit complicated, I'll admit. Especially if you're me", you shrugged, and he turned to you, confused.

"Let me explain. I loved your idea for a bed of roses, a few days ago, cause it can exemplify our relationship so well. The roses feel so good against the skin, the smell is so intoxicating, it looks so beautiful - maybe too beautiful, ethereal, even. But then there's always a few thorns here and there, and they hurt so much when they lodge themselves on my skin, but I'm so intoxicated by the whole experience that I don't mind - I convince myself that it's nothing, and even that it's already part of me already, cause the thorns fit so perfectly on me, on my little stabs made by myself, by my own insecurities", you say, and he stares at you.

"What I'm trying to say is that every minute that I'm with you always distract me from the issues that come with being with you - the fact that there's a few expectations that come with being your serious girlfriend, be them always travelling with you while we're young, or eventually staying home once we have kids, knowing that you'll eventually cheat on me with a younger version of myself, while I'm too tired of taking care of the babies to even think about my sexual needs", you said, and you watched him frown.

"I'm not sure where you're going with this-", he started saying, but you cut him off.

"Let me finish, I promise it will get better", you said, fixing your posture as you start again. "But the thing is, I love you. I always have, ever since I started talking to you, you always trying to outflirt me, always seeing me as your equal. You desire me, but you also listen and see me as another human being, you never back down or ignore me if I challenge one of your beliefs, and you never treat me as a trophy-wife-to-be", you say, and you can feel your eyes fill with tears, but you're smiling. That's what you always loved about Roger. He smiled back at you.

"And because I love you, I don't want to deny myself the pleasure of being with you. I'd rather be in a bed of roses than in an empty bed - or worse, a blank bed, someone being there just so it's less cold at night. I want to be with you, Rog", you say, and he pulls you in for a hug, and you hold him back for a few moments before pulling away and looking at him in the eye.

"But also because I love you and I want to be with you, Rog, I don't want us to try to fit into this type of relationship I just mentioned. I don't want you to make me the other woman, either, when you eventually find someone so you can settle down, if it's not me" you said, rubbing your nose. "I guess I want to settle down with you, eventually, as we planned before, but this whole thing - living together and cheating if we're away for too long - it kills me, and I think it kills you, too. I respect you too much to want to cheat on you again, cause if I ever do and you never find out, I'll lose respect for you, and the same thing will happen if you cheat on me and I don't find out. And these are ugly truths, but this isn't our first time together; we know each other, we need to think about this", you told him, and he nodded.

"And I need to make it clear that I'll never be a simple rockstar housewife - I'll never be able to quit my job and look out for the kids while you travel the world and I make them lunch. I'll never be able to sit down on a dinner table on some award show with you and when someone asks me what I'll do, I'll smile as I say I'm a king-maker. I'm not", you said, firmly.

"And I'll never be satisfied with dumb spa and shopping trips as you do the actual work when we travel. If I have to live this life, I'll resent you, and I don't want that. I like being domestic with you, but this type of forced domesticity will poison us again - we're both too wild, too career-focused, for this. We've always been similar", you said, and he gave you a smile as you sighed. "I guess that's all I have to say", you shrugged, and he laughed. "Not much, right?", he said, running his fingers on his hair, pulling the strands back.

"Guess it's my turn now", he said, and you nodded, encouraging him. "When I saw you again, at the pub, there was so much that I wanted to say. I mostly wanted to apologize - it got lost as I got infatuated with you again, and tried to get you in bed - you know, usual stuff", he winked, and you laughed.

"But yeah, I kept looking at you while you updated me on your life, your skin glooming under the stars and the moonlight, and I couldn't stop thinking about all the things I wanted to apologize to you for. All the pain we caused each other. Everything I put on you. Everything I needed you to be or needed you to say. Cause no matter what - even if you had decided on never seeing me again after all this - I'll always love you, because we grew up together. And you helped make me who I am", he said, moving strands of your hair behind your ear.

"I just want you to know that there will always be a piece of you in me, always. Whatever someone you become, wherever you are in the world, however this" he said, pointing his finger to the two of us "works out, in whatever form it might take", he said, sighing "I'll always send you love. Before being anything else to me - and I hope to God you're always something more - you'll always be my friend, to the end", he told you, and the tears were already streaming down your cheeks. His cheeks soon mirrored yours.

"And now, after you so eloquently told me all your fears about our future, I need you to know something else, too", he said, as you wiped the tears under your eyes. "I always loved you for being the way you are. You always challenge me, you always make me work harder, try harder, to be better. And it's not even something you force me to do; I just follow your lead. The way you look was what first got into me, I won't lie, but the way you are is what made me stay. It's what will always make me stay", he said, a genuine smile on his lips. He made you feel warm, like the sun.

"You're the smartest person I know, you're funny, you enjoy sex, you're unapologetic, you're proud of who you are, even proud of your insecurities. And you have such a huge importance in my life: you made me who I am. Whatever way you want to make us work, I trust you. I just want to be with you, in whatever form it takes", he said, smiling, and then getting up and opening his bag.

"I forgot to give you something", he said, pulling a string out of the front pocket. You recognized the red glimmer. It was the heart necklace. "It's still yours to keep. Even though it's not in its original glory, it will always be yours. The necklace and my heart", he said, and you couldn't help but smile at him.

"Always so cheesy, Taylor", you said, joking as you moved your hair to the side so he could put the necklace on.

"You always loved it", he winked, and you laughed. "I do", you said, smiling.

"So, what does it all mean? Where are we?", you asked, and he shrugged. "Wherever you want us to be. I just hope that you keep me around", he told you sincerely.

"I will. So, we're not going back to our old ways, right? We're not back at sharing a flat and stuff", you said, and he nodded. "Sure".

"And you're going to spend a month away, all around the world. I don't want you to feel pressured not to cheat", you said, and he nodded again.

"Yeah, and you're back in London, starting a new job. I don't want you to be worried, too", he said.

"So, maybe no exclusivity, this time? At least not now. This is still debatable, in the future", you said, and he agreed.

"Makes sense. But I'll have a hard time desiring anyone but you", Roger said in a low voice, and you laughed to break any mood that might have settled. You needed to get things clear before making out in the train cabin.

"Me too, Rog. But I don't want to create any expectations of loyalty because we know each other too well, and I don't want a stupid fight to break this thing we're building together", you said.

"It's a good idea. So, no titles, too? I can't call you my girlfriend?", he said, and you laughed.

"You can, if you want to", you told him, and he pulled you closer to him.

"Good, cause I want to call you that on the News of the World launch party, that I'm hoping you'll go as my date", he said, pressing a kiss on top of your head, breathing in your fruity smell.

"Of course I'll go. I need to see the boys again", you told him, and he laughed.

"So you're not going for me, then?", he pouted, and you laughed again.

"No, I'm just going so I can meet Deacy's kid", you told him, and it was his turn to laugh.

-

Once you got to London, Roger offered to go to the airport alone - he had to get on his flight, and he was late. He knew you had to go home and get ready for work tomorrow, but you wanted to spend as much time with him as possible.

He looked relieved when you got on a cab with him to Heathrow.

"Big day tomorrow, huh", he said, rubbing your arm.

"Yeah, I still can't believe I'm finally going to work at the British Museum. It's so surreal, it feels like a dream. Like I'm living someone else's life", you said, looking out at the window, the early sunday morning reminding you of fresh starts - you were in the middle of one.

"Well, it's your life, and it's your job, cause you deserve it, babe. I never met someone who worked so hard to get where they want", Roger said, smiling, proud.

"I did. You and the boys", you said, and he huffed. "Guess you're right. Me and that pack of idiots, we turned out okay", he joked.

Once you got to the airport, you followed him to his gate.

You were feeling nervous - you had him for a week, and now it's time to say goodbye again.

You're both aware that the rest of the band is already waiting impatiently in the jet, but you can't help it - you hug him, dropping your luggage on the floor, and he does the same, the hug soon turning into a kiss as you rub your hands on each other's body, as if you're trying to remember how every inch of the other feels like, as if you're both about to disappear.

But the airport worker clears her throat, and you break the kiss, looking at each other longingly.

"Don't say goodbye", you beg Roger, putting your hand on his lips as he opens his mouth.

"See you soon", he says between your fingers. You smile at him, grateful he found a way with words so you're not repeating the same old goodbyes.

"See you soon, Roger", you say, hugging him again for a few seconds, just trying to capture every detail - his smell, the feeling of his arms around you, his body against yours.

And once he has to go into the jet, you go to the glass wall, and you can swear you see some familiar faces from the windows of the jet.

But before you can focus, soon Roger's well known face takes over the window you're watching, and he puts a hand on the glass.

You can't help but think about the last time you did that with him, him being on your place as you were inside the plane, moving to another country, your heart weighing down on you, filled with doubts.

But now your heart warmed you up, filled with joy and love, and you could feel Roger's crystal heart on top of your chest. He was right. There would be always a piece of him on you, too.

-

Epilogue: News of the World Launch Party

"Y/N! You're back!" Brian's voice welcomed you to the ballroom.

You squeezed Roger's hand - it was the first time you saw the band in years, and you couldn't help but feel a bit nervous about it.

"Darling, you're really back! We thought Roger was getting high too often and hallucinated a week in Paris with you. But I guess you did come back to him", Freddie said, hugging you by the side as he held a glass of champagne on his other hand.

"I'm back with him only so I can see you all again, of course", you said, winking at Roger as he pretended to be offended.

But then you heard Deacy and Veronica scream your name in unison, and you turned to see them.

"So you're really back!!" Deacy said, but your eyes were on the baby boy on his lap.

"This is the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life.", you said, trying to get his attention. Roger looked at you, adoringly, as you moved your eyes to Veronica.

"Ronnie!! You're so big!" you said, trying to hug her through her belly. "It's coming out in a few months! It's a boy, Michael. Someone our young Rob can play with", she said, and Roger frowned.

"I could swear it was a girl", he said, and John smiled. "Maybe next time", he said.

"Hey, Bob. Do you want to play with me? C'mon", you said, and he motioned to go to your arms. You picked him up as he started playing with your hair.

"You'd be a good mom, Y/N", Veronica said, and you got tense. "God, Ronnie, don't even joke about this", you said, and Roger chuckled. "It's a sensitive topic at the moment", he explained.

"The moment will take quite some time, you know", you told him, the youngest Deacon pulling your earring before playing with the crystal heart on your neck.

You talked to the boys and Veronica for a while, updating each other, but no one brought up how you and Roger got back together. It just felt natural - no need to question.

You stayed with Roger for the whole night - behind the cameras as he did press, by his side during dinner - where he was back at his old ways, teasing you lightly with his hand under the table. You felt good in his arms, getting back into his life.

He was interested in getting back into your life, too. He came back to London last night, and went straight to dinner with you. You were trying different food, and now was time to try Indian food.

As he ate his Chicken Tikka Masala, dipping the naan in the sauce, you invited him for a party your bosses would be throwing next month to celebrate a new exhibit.

He gave you a bright smile. "I'd love to be your date, my love", he said.

And after the Deacons went home - Robert was asleep on his father's lap - the party got louder, the dance floor more full. You could swear you saw an angular face that could only belong to Bowie pick someone to dance - was this Princess Leia? - but before you could process the whole situation, Roger pulled you to dance.

"Thought you didn't dance, Mr Taylor", you told him, wrapping your arms around his neck as you tried to slow dance to All The Young Dudes, by Mott The Hoople.

"I don't dance very well, indeed. But it's just an excuse to be so close to you in public, and God, I'm dying to call you Ms Taylor", he said, and you chuckled.

"Take it slower, Rog", you told him, and he leaned in to rest his head on the curve of your neck. "And why do you want to be close to me in public? Is it still one of your weird fetishes?", you joked, and you felt him laugh against your skin.

"No, it's just that you've been killing me with this dress of yours, and you've been killing a lot of the guys here, too. Could swear I saw Bowie checking you out", he told you, and you gasped.

"Taylor, don't even joke about this. I'd have a heart attack", you said, and he laughed. "You'd leave me here for Bowie, is that it?", he asked, and you laughed.

"Of course not. I just have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that he might acknowledge my existence", you said, and it was his turn to laugh. "The only eyes I really like to feel on me when I look away are yours, Rog", you said, and he gave you a quick kiss.

"Okay, had enough of trying to dance. Let's get some fresh air", he told you, and you followed him to the balcony.

As the cold, fresh air brushed against your exposed skin, you heard the first notes to Tiny Dancer, by Elton John. You walked to the balcony, leaning in and taking in the view of London at night.

Roger soon took you into his arms, hugging you from behind, and you felt safe, his body heart making you warm in the cold evening as he jokingly whispered "Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man" into your ear, and you scoffed. "Slower, Taylor", you told him, and he laughed.

"However you want it, babe", he said, now paying attention to the view, focusing on the feeling on you in his arms again. Finally.

 But oh how it feels so real

Lying here with no one near

Only you and you can hear me

When I say softly, slowly

 "I could die right now, Y/N. I'm just... happy. I've never felt this type of happiness before. I'm just exactly where I want to be", Roger said in his husky voice, and you nodded lightly in agreement.

Because in Roger's arms, you feel home. You feel what you hoped to feel for years - what got you to move to London in the first place. You feel like you belong.

---

1988 Special

Taglist:

@taylorroger-s @sarai-ibn-la-ahad @its-nessi @anamcg317 @frenchieswiftie @queen-danielle-dani-dan @minihemo @shutup-sorry @theyrealllegends @killerqueenisthebest @ashagracelove @hardy-s @fuckinghurricanesoul @secretsweetscollectionblog @mrswinterhater @11mb0 @tamtam-go92 @derptatosaur @brianandthemays @phantom-fangirl-stuff @the-hysterical-queen @rogerofmylife @notevenlxvely @discodeakyy @x1975sos @16wiishes @jennycidesstuff @partydulce @melros-e @onevisionliz

[unproduciblesmackdown]

How do you even come up with your drawing ideas? Like, the poses and actions and stuff... I always try to find different poses for my characters but end up using often the same, so, yeah going back to the question, hOW dO YOU DO IT AAA also i'm super jealous of you?? Your style is amazing and your skills just aa omfg good job ily but i'm also jealous

hmmm first thank you!!! i am jealous of everyone too coz who isnt but im honored to be someone anyone thinks of as Good…and to get nice asks abt it is a real gift and i always appreciate it a lot…makes my week and all

uhh its kind of a good question how i come up w ideas….im actually heinously uncreative. but i AM gay & thats pretty much the theme in everything i ever make lol…i kind of just have ideas on a whim i guess, or thinking up certain scenarios that i also find i can picture as drawings, or just getting inspiration from any random little source & converting it into a drawing…hm. i just think of any sort of moment that would seem fun to depict & kinda reverse engineer it into how i might manage to put it into a drawing

pose-wise, i rarely ever have a drawing fully envisioned before i start making it, which probably just makes things more difficult for me…but like when i think of a certain general possible Pose, it tends to come to me in pieces…like i’ll start with some main idea about posture or a certain action or point of contact or something, but i’ll end up having to be like ok so uhhh, what are the legs doing?? or where is the other arm in all this, etc etc etc. often i’ll try to plan out how the Main Thing will look, and build the rest of the pose around what will simply look good with that &/or contribute to the balance/flow/silhouette of the body idk

i really do not have that much of an organized approach to anything i do at all rip

most of my inspiration for drawing bodies ever was to be able to show actions / interactions & to use the body to further express mood/emotion……you can only do so much thru drawing only from the shoulders up yanno? and it gets kinda fun to draw the more you get used to it

tbh i find it harder to draw like really basic poses like the Just Standing There feet together / arms at sides pose….so i’m part drawing things more dynamically as a convenience for myself, which is also always the motivation behind all my artistic choices pretty much. but it also kinda helps that nobody really ever stands that way, and if they are it sort of implies some kind of formality. posture and the way ppl carry themselves can express a lot….basically everything i draw is also about expressing emotions, so i really like how things can be shown via the body as well as the face. like hands and legs can be really expressive & overall posture and the way ppl move, which isnt always showable in a static image, but movement can always be implied / shown in one way or another…though i still tend to primarily focus on faces. like how i really enjoy subtler color palettes but always end up using really bright colors myself when im using color at all, rip, oh well

basically idk i find more expressive poses more fun to draw, and more yknow expressive…also i’m really picky about lines/curves having clear angles where they connect and shapes being fairly distinct, and i think thats also easier to have when bodies are moved/held more angularly….it makes the silhouette more fun too, not like thats hugely important, just again that i think all of this is more fun to draw than having a Just Standing There default pose. though those can be good too. there is a place for everything

ummmm it IS really frustrating trying to start doing something you don’t usually do & you’re like god whats the point doing something thats just misery all the time…i mean i dont consider myself that great at drawing bodies, i’m trying to be better at keeping things as 3d shapes in my head and being kinda sculptural abt drawing poses and stuff, and perspective always throws a wrench in things. but the silver lining is that when you’re starting out is generally guaranteed to be the worst of it & even though eternal dissatisfaction is the curse of drawing & everything else, things at least get easier & you can always look back on stuff and want to die because you were so much more shit at basic things back then sigh

i’m the worst to give advice about how to Practice Things, because i don’t. because i’m not trying to get good at art, i’m just trying to be better at whatever i wanna draw, which is always very limited…and i dont have the focus to ever do basic exercise stuff anyways…i cant even ever remember to use references 95% of the time. but it can help a lot, especially starting out….some artists will do like a whole page of really dynamic / dramatic / unusual poses and those are great to look at, and theres always photos of course…though idk that i’d worry too much about being strictly realistic, just kinda think of it as a starting point to build off of and make adjustments as you want them / use it more as guidelines. stylizing something sometimes looks more realistic than a picture honestly….real pix of bodies can just be ridiculous like wtf. aesthetically terrible, boo

idk if any of this seems relevant to anything you were really asking or if i all went off on a tangent there lma o …..i dont think im the best for advice!! but the good news is you probably already have a better approach than me. i just sneak practicing shit / trying new things into whatever gay thing i feel like making, and i guess i just happen to get better lol…every drawing makes you better even if the drawing sucks….thats one less bad drawing out of the way yknow

[internetdetectives]

11/15/19 - Chat with The Producer

The Producer 1:51 PM: "whats up”

The Producer 1:51 PM: "the producer, comin at you again because i forgot my email address”

Xenquility 1:51 PM: "lmao”

The Producer 1:51 PM: "see this is why im at the bottom of the totem pole”

The Producer 1:52 PM: "weed boys light up”

The Producer 1:52 PM: "and yes Bup does enjoy """""fun"""""”

Xenquility 1:53 PM: "Do dimension travelling bad guys still smoke weed”

The Producer 1:53 PM: "everyone has time to smoke weed”

Xenquility 1:53 PM: "Yknow why do these guys have to have fun by killing people”

Xenquility 1:53 PM: "couldn't they just get addicted to heroine or something”

The Producer 1:53 PM: "also im not a bad guy”

The Producer 1:53 PM: "only bup is a bad guy”

Xenquility 1:53 PM: "(I know)”

The Producer 1:53 PM: ":wink:”

The Producer 1:53 PM: "im addicted to herobrine”

Xenquility 1:54 PM: "herobrine is my dad”

Xenquility 1:54 PM: "give me admin or he'll ban you”

The Producer 1:54 PM: "damn”

Xenquility 1:54 PM: "he knows bill gates”

The Producer 1:54 PM: "another spooky possessed minecraft admin”

The Producer 1:54 PM: "just kidding”

The Producer 1:54 PM: "perhaps its best if we leave that whole debacle in the past”

Xenquility 1:55 PM: "Hey why did Bup have to  do SKM like that”

The Producer 1:55 PM: "that wasnt Bup's doing”

Xenquility 1:55 PM: "Oh shit”

The Producer 1:55 PM: "technically it wasnt any of ours”

Xenquility 1:55 PM: "Any idea whose it was?”

Xenquility 1:55 PM: "inb4 we cause it in the future”

The Producer 1:56 PM: "something nasty did it”

The Producer 1:56 PM: "dark forces mixed with one of our members”

Xenquility 1:56 PM: "sounds kinky”

Xenquility 1:56 PM: "what type of dark forces?”

The Producer 1:58 PM: "dark forces we're all familiar with”

The Producer 1:58 PM: "things that come and go”

The Producer 1:58 PM: "Noise”

The Producer 1:58 PM: "id answer more clearly but that's not in the cards atm”

Xenquility 1:58 PM: "to which one”

The Producer 1:58 PM: "yes”

The Producer 1:58 PM: "he came down with a bad case of the D”

Xenquility 1:59 PM: ":PROVIDETHED:”

Xenquility 1:59 PM: "wait”

The Producer 1:59 PM: "my bad”

Xenquility 1:59 PM: "did you have to provide him the D this time”

The Producer 1:59 PM: "unfortunately he gave it to himself”

Xenquility 1:59 PM: "woah”

Xenquility 1:59 PM: "can you get him to record it next time”

The Producer 1:59 PM: "a very talented man”

Xenquility 1:59 PM: "I need it for science”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:00 PM: ":regi:”

Xenquility 2:00 PM: ":dad3:”

The Producer 2:00 PM: "if only we had an artist here to depict such a thing”

Xenquility 2:00 PM: "we have a coomer to depict such things”

Xenquility 2:00 PM: "if that counts”

The Producer 2:00 PM: "one talented in manly copulation”

The Producer 2:00 PM: "no coomers allowed”

The Producer 2:00 PM: "company policy”

Xenquility 2:01 PM: "fine by me”

The Producer 2:01 PM: "coompany policy”

Xenquility 2:01 PM: "I hope these conversations get archived”

The Producer 2:02 PM: "they always do”

Xenquility 2:02 PM: "hell yes”

The Producer 2:02 PM: "i just have to be careful not to mention erratas or my bosses w”

Xenquility 2:02 PM: "anyways any chance you could tell us why it was useful for :dad: and :moonman: to be in the past”

The Producer 2:03 PM: "not sure”

The Producer 2:03 PM: "that's Bup's forte”

The Producer 2:03 PM: "but good luck getting any info out of them”

Xenquility 2:03 PM: "the only way he gives us stuff is if we gamble with people's lives”

Xenquility 2:03 PM: "and even then we might not get a straight answer”

Xenquility 2:03 PM: "sorry why do you work with this dude again”

The Producer 2:04 PM: "a baby's gotta do what a baby's gotta do”

Xenquility 2:04 PM: "do you make minimum wage”

The Producer 2:04 PM: "*gots to do”

The Producer 2:04 PM: "sorry”

Xenquility 2:04 PM: "cause if not you should sue”

The Producer 2:08 PM: "Bup can often be a hanful”

The Producer 2:08 PM: "and also a handful”

The Producer 2:08 PM: "and also a mouthfull”

The Producer 2:08 PM: "but I trust him”

Xenquility 2:08 PM: "insulting the boss? I'm reporting you to hr”

The Producer 2:08 PM: "no wait”

The Producer 2:08 PM: "i dont want to get docked again”

The Producer 2:08 PM: "my payment i mean”

Xenquility 2:09 PM: "where can we sign up to work interdimensional office jobs sound great”

The Producer 2:09 PM: "you all have the capacity to”

Xenquility 2:09 PM: "the capacity to sign up?”

The Producer 2:10 PM: "well”

The Producer 2:10 PM: "not sign up for this specific organization”

The Producer 2:10 PM: "but you could become a wide-eyed up and coming spooky entrepreneur based on your own merits”

Xenquility 2:12 PM: "sounds cool”

Xenquility 2:12 PM: "How exactly would that work?”

The Producer 2:15 PM: "first you must enter a deep sleep where you can tap into your inner dreams”

The Producer 2:15 PM: "then you must make a sacrifice”

The Producer 2:15 PM: "not one of blood but one of time”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:15 PM: "Did you say”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:15 PM: "Dream”

The Producer 2:15 PM: "then you must do a bunch of other stupid esoteric bullshit and boom suddenly youre the CEO of bigdicks spookyboys r us”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:16 PM: "Cool where I can put my curriculum”

Xenquility 2:16 PM: "i wanna be the ceo of bigdicks spookyboyrs r us”

Xenquility 2:16 PM: "what does this "other stupid esoteric bullshit" entail?”

The Producer 2:16 PM: "no education requirements... required”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:16 PM: "Who shall I contact then”

Xenquility 2:17 PM: "does doing all this shit turn you evil or is it just normally done by evil people”

The Producer 2:18 PM: "moral requirements are also not required”

The Producer 2:18 PM: "also i should specify that all of this is me attempting to describe very non-descript things”

The Producer 2:18 PM: ”dont take it too literally

The Producer 2:18 PM: "or do”

The Producer 2:18 PM: "unless...?”

Xenquility 2:19 PM: "so is basically a "find your own inner CEO" scam”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:20 PM: "Piramyd scheme”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:20 PM: ":funkyface:”

The Producer 2:23 PM: "Damn”

The Producer 2:23 PM: "im starting to realize”

The Producer 2:23 PM: "maybe this is a △ scheme”

Xenquility 2:25 PM: "yes”

Xenquility 2:25 PM: "come to the light side”

Xenquility 2:25 PM: "we have uh”

Xenquility 2:25 PM: "things”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:25 PM: "And uh”

The Producer 2:25 PM: "does it pay more than over here”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:25 PM: "Phisical bodies?”

The Producer 2:25 PM: "aka more than 0”

Xenquility 2:25 PM: "Probably yes”

Xenquility 2:25 PM: "Actually  yes'”

Xenquility 2:25 PM: "minimum wage is like 14 dollars in canada”

The Producer 2:26 PM: ">canada”

Xenquility 2:26 PM: "lower in the US but their dollar is worth more so it balances out”

The Producer 2:26 PM: "ill stay here thanks”

Xenquility 2:26 PM: "aw”

Xenquility 2:26 PM: "but if you come here you get to be hunted by your previous coworkers for all of eternity”

Xenquility 2:26 PM: "it's funner than it sounds”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:27 PM: ">14$”

The Producer 2:27 PM: "damn”

The Producer 2:27 PM: "theyll get The Hunter on my ass”

Xenquility 2:27 PM: "Ooo”

Xenquility 2:27 PM: ""The Hunter"”

ARGdov 2:27 PM: "I cant believe BUP and co are running an instagram pyramid scheme”

The Producer 2:27 PM: "we sell knives”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:27 PM: "Fuk”

Xenquility 2:27 PM: "that sounds like the name of an edgy teenager named Hunter”

ARGdov 2:28 PM: "man my mom bought knives from one of those people”

ARGdov 2:28 PM: "seemingly completely unaware of how fishy theyre business strategy is”

ARGdov 2:28 PM: "granted they are very good knives”

The Producer 2:28 PM: "id rather they send The Hunter than The Coomer”

Xenquility 2:28 PM: "hey”

Xenquility 2:28 PM: "you said no coomers allowed”

The Producer 2:29 PM: "im kidding, we don't have either of those people”

The Producer 2:29 PM: "you caught me”

ARGdov 2:29 PM: "wasnt the hunter one of the skeksis in the dark crystal”

ARGdov 2:29 PM: "sorry Im just joking”

The Producer 2:30 PM: "we're not that strict”

The Producer 2:30 PM: "theres just a few rules we need to abide by”

ARGdov 2:30 PM: "like what”

The Producer 2:30 PM: "tbh we're much less organized than those other guys”

ARGdov 2:30 PM: "1: be fucking obtuse and vague to everyone outside of the company”

The Producer 2:30 PM: "Id rather have The Coomer sent after me instead of The Operator any day”

Xenquility 2:30 PM: "hey”

Xenquility 2:30 PM: "you said no operator's allowed”

ARGdov 2:30 PM: "I mean yeah fair”

ARGdov 2:30 PM: "the operators spoopy”

ARGdov 2:30 PM: "glad slendermans not real”

ARGdov 2:30 PM: "what the fuck was that”

Xenquility 2:31 PM: "?”

ARGdov 2:31 PM: "some reaction popped up”

ARGdov 2:31 PM: "it POPPED AGAIN AND I MISSED IT”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:31 PM: "Oh fuck marble hornets” 

ARGdov 2:31 PM: "ok its "WOW"”

Xenquility 2:31 PM: "wow”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:31 PM: "That series is great”

Xenquility 2:31 PM: "who reacted with it?”

ARGdov 2:31 PM: "dunno who posted it but I can guess”

ARGdov 2:31 PM: "Im guessing Producer”

ARGdov 2:31 PM: "idk”

ARGdov 2:31 PM: "I keep missing”

Xenquility 2:32 PM: "tf they just used :dream:”

ARGdov 2:32 PM: "yea”

The Producer 2:32 PM: "no sorry i was away”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:32 PM: "Prolly just wolfposting”

ARGdov 2:32 PM: "oh yeah prolly”

ARGdov 2:32 PM: "anyhow”

The Producer 2:33 PM: "also

The Producer 2:33 PM: "”1: be fucking obtuse and vague to everyone outside of the company””

The Producer 2:33 PM: "yes”

ARGdov 2:33 PM: "how long has your organization even been around?”

ARGdov 2:33 PM: "thats not surprising lol”

ARGdov 2:33 PM: "2: do whatever BUP says”

ARGdov 2:33 PM: "3: if there is somehow an issue with these two contradicting one another, check with BUP”

ARGdov 2:33 PM: "4: see rule one”

Xenquility 2:34 PM: "5: ???”

Xenquility 2:34 PM: "6: profit”

The Producer 2:34 PM: "we've been around since the beginning”

The Producer 2:34 PM: "but as ive said, some have come and gone”

ARGdov 2:34 PM: "since the begining”

ARGdov 2:34 PM: "so since before all this nonsense started”

ARGdov 2:34 PM: "granted”

ARGdov 2:34 PM: "this has been going on in some capacity since the 80s, seeing thats when the MC formed”

ARGdov 2:34 PM: "so not really helpful”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:35 PM: "Hm”

The Producer 2:35 PM: "7. dont be helpful”

ARGdov 2:35 PM: "well thats basically rule 1”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:35 PM: "What if u disobey?”

The Producer 2:36 PM: "ill get smote”

Xenquility 2:36 PM: "bup  can smite people wtf”

The Producer 2:36 PM: "i dont really wish to disobey though”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:36 PM: "Fuking zeus”

The Producer 2:36 PM: "as i said, i trust bup”

ARGdov 2:36 PM: "you get cut”

ARGdov 2:36 PM: "literally”

ARGdov 2:36 PM: "figuratively”

ARGdov 2:36 PM: "painfully”

ARGdov 2:36 PM: "permanently”

The Producer 2:36 PM: "that doesnt necessarily mean you should though”

ARGdov 2:36 PM: "or something”

ARGdov 2:36 PM: "so you've been around for awhile”

The Producer 2:37 PM: "bup will cut”

ARGdov 2:37 PM: "but are only making yourselves known now”

The Producer 2:37 PM: "theyre really good at scissoring”

Xenquility 2:37 PM: "hot”

The Producer 2:38 PM: "i cant say too much more though or they'll get on my ass about it”

Xenquility 2:38 PM: "if bup is good at scissoring does that confirm they're female”

The Producer 2:38 PM: "like i said i dont wanna assume for them”

The Producer 2:38 PM: "they identify as toad”

Xenquility 2:39 PM: "I mean I don't want to discriminate but it's kinda hard for a man to scissor”

otherLiam 2:39 PM: "Clearly you aren’t trying hard enough.”

The Producer 2:39 PM: "^”

otherLiam 2:39 PM: "Also hi.”

The Producer 2:40 PM: "hello coomerLiam”

Xenquility 2:40 PM: "woah”

Xenquility 2:40 PM: "harsh”

otherLiam 2:40 PM: "?”

otherLiam 2:40 PM: "is that like a racial slur”

Xenquility 2:40 PM: "yes”

The Producer 2:40 PM: "this server claims this is the internet coomtectives right”

Xenquility 2:40 PM: "producer is a huge racist”

The Producer 2:40 PM: "my apologies”

otherLiam 2:40 PM: "i prefer zoomerLiam”

The Producer 2:40 PM: "i meme with extreme prejudice”

ARGdov 2:41 PM: "nice”

Xenquility 2:41 PM: "bigotry makes the memes grow fonder”

The Producer 2:41 PM: "and my dick grow harder” 

Xenquility 2:41 PM: ";)”

otherLiam 2:42 PM: "So why follow BUP?”

The Producer 2:42 PM: "we have share the same goal”

Xenquility 2:42 PM: "since when does bup have a goal”

otherLiam 2:42 PM: "I don’t suppose you’d tell us what that is.”

The Producer 2:42 PM: "refer to rules 1 and 7”

Xenquility 2:43 PM: "what if we say finding it out will severely deter us from living?”

Xenquility 2:43 PM: "the truth will blow our mind or something”

The Producer 2:43 PM: "well I dont want that”

Xenquility 2:44 PM: "damnit”

otherLiam 2:44 PM: "wat rules”

The Producer 2:44 PM: "also refer to rule 34”

The Producer 2:44 PM: "haha lol xd”

The Producer 2:44 PM: "theres another XD for you”

Xenquility 2:44 PM: "also could you tell me where your office is located because I keep imagining some stereotypical office building floating in a rift between dimensions and it's hurting my brain”

Xenquility 2:44 PM: "or some sort of general area”

Xenquility 2:44 PM: "like what planet”

The Producer 2:44 PM: "no that sounds about right”

Xenquility 2:45 PM: "fuck yes”

Xenquility 2:45 PM: "how do you get wifi”

otherLiam 2:45 PM: "so how exactly do you “produce” stuff? is it just magic or do you sometimes have to just go to the store”

The Producer 2:47 PM: "i walk down to the spook store”

The Producer 2:47 PM: "sometimes use my spook heelies”

Xenquility 2:47 PM: "is that inbetween dimensions too”

The Producer 2:47 PM: "yeah”

The Producer 2:47 PM: "its like a inter dimensional 7/11”

Xenquility 2:47 PM: "also are there any villains that aren't inherently "spooky"”

Xenquility 2:47 PM: "like just average joes”

Xenquility 2:47 PM: "that happen to be evil”

Slinky Stinks△ 2:48 PM: "”its like a inter dimensional 7/11””

Slinky Stinks△ 2:48 PM: "I'm in”

The Producer 2:51 PM: "Id argue that Bup isn't really that spooky”

The Producer 2:51 PM: "I mean he's toad”

Xenquility 2:51 PM: "true”

pakospooky 2:51 PM: "IIIII”

pakospooky 2:51 PM: "coming”

The Producer 2:52 PM: "oof”

The Producer 2:52 PM: "Pako posting forbidden things”

pakospooky 2:52 PM: "what?”

pakospooky 2:52 PM: "how forbidden?”

The Producer 2:52 PM: "refer to rules 1, 7, and also rules 8 - 99 which all ready "be spookey be spookey be spookey"”

The Producer 2:52 PM: "anyways the boys are sending me out to pick up some spook donuts”

The Producer 2:52 PM: "see you all later”

Xenquility 2:53 PM: "seeya broski”

[nijiimura]

all greek deities binch 💞❣️♥️💕💖

o FUCK

Aphrodite: what you find attractive in a personwhen we have the same humor, when theyre SUPER passionate about something, their generosity, and their kindness and patience 

Apollo: favourite piece of musiccurrently? lately its been a lot of soundtracks from underrated animated movies  and some covers from said animated movies 

Ares: opinion on wardont like it? but war is inevitable, humanity has been at war with itself since the beginning of time. and war, sometimes, is necessary, to protect  human rights and the innocent... ejkfsnfkdns yea idk how to articulate it idk man war’s gonna happen 

Artemis: favourite animal and whyOTTERS bc theyre so fuckin cool btihc.... sea otters especially theyre so fuzzy and they crack shells open w rocks so when they find the Special Rock they just keep it. they float on their backs and hold hands w other otters so they wont float away!! mommy otters will actually tangle their baby in kelp so they wont float away while theyre hunting!! the mom will also hold the baby on her tummy while floating too :’ )

Athena: share a piece of wisdomwhen punching a nazi, dont hit them in the jaw or cheekbone!! its gonna kill your knuckles!! so gauge out their eyes instead

Dionysus: red, white, or rosé?mike’s hard lemonade yeet

Demeter: favourite season and whyautumn!! i love cool temperatures and tbh in autumn my wardrobe POPS. i finally can break out my favorite bomber, wear jeans and leggings again, long sweaters? sweatshirts? FLANNELS?? you can basically just layer it on up and still can by comfy and killing it!!

Eros: describe your crushi dont have a special lady in my life rn but uh theres fanglia

Hades: do you believe in life after death?ok fuck yea in reincarnation!! sorry imma go on a little rant but the idea of heaven is.... idk... the idea that ppl truly believe theyre going to be the same person after death for all of eternity mind boggles me... i truly believe when we die our bodies rot and decompose and we come back as the bottom of the food chain, as some sort of plant, then eventually work back up the chain. it sounds so ridiculous as im typing it out, but i kinda seek comfort in that idea that after i die im just gonna be come a patch of flowers. idk why!! also i used to believe that when we die we basically just “wake up” as our new selves, you just get randomly placed in the food chain, like one day your a 80 y/o man and the next your suddenly a newborn cat. IT SOUNDS RIDICULOUS but YEA either one works anyways reincarnation is cool as shit

Helios: opinion on tanningNDSKNFDSFD BITCH IDFK

Hephaestus: do you think disability can ruin a relationship?if you believe disability can ruin a relationship u deserve a swift kick to the balls and dick

Hera: opinion on feminismabsolutely necessary 

Hermes: last text you sent“bc bakugo in the beginning was basically to make deku's life a living hell” LMAO

Hestia: describe your ideal houselittle house in the woods in the rockies. i live away from the busy city but i’m not completely isolated. i have a screened in porch w a spectacular view of the rockies! i have flowerpots on every windowsill and a small garden in my backyard and a little harb garden in my kitchen. i have a roomy kitchen and a big ol workspace. a bedroom w a giant window facing the rockies! and a wife and some pets to share it with im so..... fuck

Pan: opinion on gay rightsi just wanna hold hands w a girl in public for more than 5 minutes bc im afraid im upsetting someone... i want the people im upsetting removed

Persephone: is climate change really a thing or is everyone just overreacting?bitch climate change is definitely a thing and its already happening!! our weather has been so weird lately because of climate change!!! our seasons are changing!! we’re gonna have hotter summers, fiercer winters!! the ocean levels are rising and cities are already beginning to flood!! you cant undo it!! the artic’s strongest sea ice just fucking broke for the first time on RECORD WE ARE KILLING OUR PLANET

Poseidon: list three fearsdrowning, riding on a motorcycle, and suspense... i cant do it

Zeus: three places you want to travel toalready answered!!

[ughdestiel]

i’ve been feeling kind of trapped and clueless lately, and i think it would really make me feel better if i just kind of put this out there in the open and get it off my chest and let those who care or are curious enough to read it so... here goes

it’s nothing crazy serious obviously. but i’ve just felt kind of out of place lately. with college and being on my own, basically, and all, it’s really different. and i do love college, i love everything im learning and becoming and discovering what i really want to do in life, but in the midst of all that. I feel so alone sometimes.

like all my close friends from high school go to different colleges, but like... 

ok so in my group of friends theres basically six of us, including myself. one of them didnt go to high school with us. but with the other four (one being my bf), one of them goes to school w our former friend, one just simply goes to school then goes home but talks with the guys (the six are all guys), then the last two is my bf and friend who go to school together. and my bf and friend is part of this club at school and they have TONS of friends like TONS and theyre always doing stuff with them like play basketball or going out to eat or something and of course im so happy that my bf got cool friends and he’s happy there and all but i cant help but get so so so. s.o jealous....

i have only one solid friend from my school. but we dont really do anything together. we used to early in the semester, but then she got a part time job and likes going to the city a lot so the only times i hang out / talk to her is either before during or after class. then she takes the bus or gets picked up by her parents. and i totally understand its not her fault and all but it just gets so beyond lonely having to go to the gym alone, to the library, to get food. and i also totally get how sometimes i have to be independent and do stuff alone and all this and that and i do love it. i do prefer doing things by myself most times but it truly, truly does get lonely. 

then when i go home, i just basically do homework and facetime my bf which is great because i only see him once a week now. but while he’s talking to our friends and im not, i get bored a lot. and of course he doesnt just talk to them the whole time, we talk as well, but yea. its so hard to explain i dont even know. my girl friends who i have known since grammar school and used to talk to on the daily dont talk to me anymore. one of them literally just cut me off but then i picked it back up but ever since then it hasnt been the same. the other one is my absolute bff, but she goes to a different school as well and shes always busy with something and she lives somewhat of a drive, so we dont really talk much either bc college and life has gotten us. but i miss them. so much. its really hard for me to make an actual friendship with another girl, because i dont know. guys too. so basically i cant make friends in general. but i miss them with all my dear heart and soul but even when i try to text them they reply either hours late or hardly reply, and its annoying and hurts so i just stopped trying

then i have another close guy friend outside of my og group. ive known him since grammar school as well even though we didnt go to the same one. anyways i would talk to him every other day and it was really nice and he was and is just such a great friend but since college we dont talk at all anymore because he has a crazy schedule and all and he travels miles to go see his gf (who i LOVE) and theyre so great im so so happy for him and everything. but yea i just miss talking to him every now and then but i understand and respect his priorities and im just really happy hes happy

so basically point of those two paragraphs is.... i get lonely. i want friends. i dont need them of course. but i do want friends. my only friend from school doesnt always want to do the stuff i want to do. it took me to convince her to play pool with me in the game room. and then to go to the gym together took less time. but she has never eased up to the offer of playing basketball, which i would love love love to do and it would bring me so so so much joy to just ball up every day or every other day after class, but i cant go alone. i wouldnt feel comfortable, because its all older dudes that go there and i would feel so attacked. i feel attacked just when im walking on campus and pass by (some) guys. i love when my bf brings me to school with him because all we do is play basketball and eat and that is all i want to do, and i wish i had someone to do that with at school.

furthermore... since college.. or well... since prom weekend of senior year.. ive been so exposed to parties and alcohol and drugs. not always physically, but mentally. the very thought of parties or consuming alcohol or using drugs has tried to pop up in my life so many times this school year. and i was never a “party” party person. never. and of course im not saying im better than those who party or drink or smoke, im just saying i wasnt made for it. ive always preferred being at a house or a chill place where my friends and i can have simple fun like board games or video games or basketball or football or just talking. i take so much passion in simple things. thats why i love my group of friends from hs. they have so much pure fun and it warms my heart and soul and makes me love them from now til eternity. 

anyways, i feel so uncomfortable about alcohol and drugs. when i was younger all of my uncles would get stupid drunk and get all crazy and it used to scare me. it honestly tramautized me. one of my uncles would get drunk so much and so bad; my family used to have a lot of family parties and of course, ppl drank. my uncle would get really drunk and just sit in the hallway downstairs, and i would obviously have to use the bathroom or get food or talk to my mom or something and would have to pass by him, and he would stop me and sit me down. I’ll never forget how he wreaked of alcohol and it made my stomach turn. and he’d put his hand over my shoulder and say something like “aj you know you are so pretty” and it would make me so uncomfortable. he never did anything awfully awful to me thank god but the amount of unease he made me feel made me terrified and angry at what alcohol does to a person. then my uncle would lecture me for thirty minutes, sometimes an hour at most. and i would be trapped because he literally wouldnt let me leave. he would be telling me about how schools important, how i have to finish school before getting a boyfriend. i couldnt get a boyfriend before finishing school, because that was bad, a sin. he throw in “youre pretty” in there so much. and it was just awful. i was tramautized. i hated it. i remember my older girl cousin who went through the same thing told me to get out of it is to say i have my period and i’ll be free- it worked. then there’s a long laundry list of how many people in my family have problems with alcohol. and i hate it. i hate what it is capable of doing to people. if you have it in moderation, thats great, but if youre excessive... please just don’t.

drugs was never a friend to me either. specifically smoking. i dont know why, i just dont like it. i wasnt exposed to it as much as alcohol which is maybe why the very idea of people wanting to smoke seems so odd to me. idk. i guess its more like i have no desire whatsoever to try and do it or make it a thing for myself and then when i see others or loved ones doing it i feel confused and i begin to question them whereas im really questioning myself. i guess the only time i’d smoke or drink is with my truly beloved ones. other than that, never. never would it ever cross my mind.  i remember when i was in a bad place end of freshman and beginning of sophomore year i wanted to drink i wanted to smoke. i wanted to forget about what was making me mentally feel pain. i remember going to seaside heights during that time and running into one of my better girl friends whom i previously mentioned and we bought hookah pens, and we smoked the shit out of that. i thought it was awesome. i thought it was the shit - it really wasnt. afterwards i was just like....ok..... wtf am i doing. i had no idea why i was doing that. i felt so weird. i didnt know my stance on anything. i was so confused. i remember trying to smoke weed with one of my then friends. he was so hyped about it, i was whatever about it. i just wanted to forget forget forget. idk what happened, but i didnt go. i didnt do it. and to this day, i really do think that was God’s work. He knew that that wasn’t what i really wanted or needed, even in my most darkest time, and God helped me resist. it blows my mind. then freshman sophomore and beginning of junior year i used to hang out with my grammar school friends A LOT. like a lot. and i vividly remember how many times i stayed upstairs in the living room watching tv with my other friend or two while everyone else was downstairs smoking. i remember feeling so out of place.. questioning why i was even there... then i realized it all came back to i just wanted friends thats all. thats all it was. they tried convincing me so many times to smoke or drink with them and it just never appealed to me. and this happened so many times because i kept going back to them and back to them and eventually i just felt like i was weird. i felt like i was the one who had the problem.

and i still feel like that. i feel like im the one who has the issue, the weird habit. i have no desire whatsoever to try alcohol or smoke or any drug or just do anything that could potentially kill my inside organs. people become so amazed when i tell them i never smoked nor have i ever drank. and when they react like that, it makes me feel like im so weird. im so out of place. like im an alien. then i feel awful about myself and ask why im not like them and not into those normal “teenager” things. when people talk about college and crazy parties and blacking out and passing out, it makes me feel like im somehow obligated to live up to those standards and i feel so restricted and a little guilty or sad i guess. because i dont do any of that. i do my homework, watch youtube videos, netflix, laugh at them, cry about them, hang out with my boyfriend and friends, and we play board games and laugh and not really cry but yeah and i do everything so simple but it means the entire world to me and makes me who i am and it makes me feel so weird and out of place when put against the standards of teenage years or young adult years and i dont know what to do with myself or how to come about it. my bf drinks only with family and sometimes friends but not much he knows his limits and i love how i can trust him and everything but gosh i get so worried.. like everything i ever learned about drugs and alcohol and then everything ive experienced with drugs and alcohol... it makes me feel so uneasy but i have help myself understand that he is not me, he does not want to stay away from all that, he wants to try it and experience that teenage young adult standard and thats his choice and as long as hes safe and loyal, which i know he is, there’s nothing wrong at all. i am still learning that. in theology my professor explained how love requires accepting the other person for who they are and compromising. love requires sacrifice. and you must choose to love. and that is what im doing for him, because i love him. same goes to my family. my not so younger cousin just started smoking, and i was shocked and honestly felt somewhat betrayed because we were the ones who were left from that whole life, but i love my cousin. so i accept him for what he’s chosen to do.

it’s been a crazy year for me, and though ive rambled on for paragraphs i still feel like i havent gotten all of it out. but this has helped. most definitely. im still trying to figure myself out. and im still trying to learn to accept others for what they choose because that is love. 

one thing i will always carry on with the rest of my life is my sophomore year latin teacher. she didnt know any latin, nor did me or my class. one day we werent doing work and my classmates and i loved talking to her and asking questions because she was so smart and insightful and awesome. my classmate asked her something about drugs and alcohol. like whats the craziest thing shes done or something, and my teacher’s reply was “never done it” and everyone was shocked, including myself. and my classmate was dumbfounded and said, “never?? youre lying” and my teacher simply said, “nope, never felt the need to.” and i found that to be the most profound thing ever. it made me realize that i didnt need to bring drugs and alcohol in my life, thats when i realized that it was not necessary. i realized i didnt need that to be cool or smart or accepted, because she was all of that. she’ll never know, but she really changed my life perspective by saying that. i hope someday i’ll come to peaceful terms with what i’ve chosen and stand by. i think i’ll be on the way there soon.

if anyone made it this far, i love you. so so much. this is why i love this website. this community this fanbase. you are all so caring and loving and helpful and genuine and just awesome. thank you for following me, just standing by me and reading what ive rambled on for pages basically. i hope someday i can update you guys by saying, “i did it.”