#idk why im so invested in these two all of a sudden lol

[pixelatedraindrops]

RAIN CODE X POKEMON:

Yuma and Eevee

You Heard of Detective Pikachu... Get ready for Detective Eevee!

Yuma's Eevee is also a top detective. (it also strongly resembles him) Raised in the WDO all it's life, it has a lot of strong insight and can usually tell if a culprit has malicious intent behind them. (but since it only senses malicious intent it isn't always right on the culprit) It's also very helpful during investigations. (its had lots of experience) With Yuma having amnesia, Eevee is very helpful to him during crime scene investigations. It has a serious nature and it has a strong will.

Of course, because of this, it does not get along with Shinigami. Because of Eevee's strong insight, it can sense her. (and pokemon and human are bound in this world by a link, so whatever yuma can see, eevee can usually see too) Being the jealous type, she calls it a “rat” constantly telling Yuma that it would just get in his way. With both of them being Yuma's partner, they became rivals. They fight and argue a lot (shinigami can understand pokemon speech) causing poor Yuma to get a headache. Yuma also has Shinigami translate what Eevee says during investigations. (tho she almost never complies unless yuma says "please" or begs her, causing eevee to get annoyed with her again) The fighting never ends with them.

Eevee does get along fairly well with the rest of the nocturnal detective agency’s Pokémon partners. It becomes best friends with Desuhiko’s partner, it has a fellow kinship with Halara’s partner since both are oddly colored, when it later meets Fubuki’s partner for the short time it comes to their aid it gets along pretty okay with it, its a little wary of Vivia’s partner, but it doesn’t hate it. And it likes to hang and take naps with the chief's partner when its at the agency (though it isn’t often) Outside of the agency, the only other Pokémon it knows personally is Kurumi’s partner. It actually has a huge crush on Eevee and loves following it around whenever Yuma and Kurumi are together. And it eventually meets Makoto’s partner, though it isn’t until MUCH later. Makoto lies saying he doesn’t have a partner when he first meets it and Yuma. But in reality, he's hiding it from sight.

Eevee can join in the Mystery Laybrinth as a guest due to the Coalescence ability since it is usually on Yuma's shoulder. Meaning it does sadly forget the case it helped it's master investigate. But it helps in other ways. When in a Mystery Labyrinth, Eevee holds onto the Solution Keys until Yuma asks for them. It carries them in a little keyring. After the mystery is solved it forgets the event like any other guest. But it makes Yuma bond with it more, since he remembers.

HUGE RAINCODE SPOILERS BELOW

Being the partner of Number One of the WDO, Eevee completely objected to his master using the Book Of Death to erase his memory for the Kanai Ward Mystery. (so it already didn't like shinigami) But he told Eevee to look after him and always be by his side to help Shinigami form him into a detective using the skills they both learned in their journey becoming Number One, together.

Since this was a command from it's master, Eevee obliged. It cared deeply for him and made sure to keep a watchful eye on him.

Through Yuma's amnesiac journey, Eevee remained by his side. Despite Yuma forgetting about it, he still allowed it to stay with him no matter how much Shinigami protested. It proved helpful in every case and even in the Mystery Labyrinth. And is even a good source of comfort for Yuma whenever he gets anxious. (he gives it hugs :3) It was always cheering for him, even if he lost his memory.

Though the memory loss does cause a bit of friction in their relationship. It even causes them to fight in Chapter 4. Due to it having the same worry as Vivia, because Eevee knew who the culprit was from the start. (Sensing the murderous and malicious intent from the culprit when he rescued Yuma) It felt conflicted and caused it to be distant from Yuma. It was both disappointed in his reluctance and worried for his feelings. Even though it knew feelings had to be discarded in these situations, with the methods of the WDO (and Number One himself) it knew for so long.

Though after Yuma got stronger from the ordeal and before the final battle, the two were practically inseparable. Shinigami even earned a bit of respect for it (though she still calls it a rat)

Up until they reach the ugly truth and Makoto reveals himself behind the mask, as well as the partner he's kept hidden all this time.

Shinigami and Eevee finally make attempts to team up to help Yuma get through the last laybrinth and final battle with his homunculus. Helping him out of the despair he feels losing who he is when both of them remember who he truly is and that he shouldn't give up. Because they're both by his side.

Once he snaps out of it the final battle between the two begin. Eevee fights Mimikyu while Yuma fights Makoto.

In the end they are both defeated. And they find the solution for Kanai Ward's mystery. Eevee comforts Mimikyu the whole time Yuma is talking to Makoto.

In the end, Shinigami acknowledges Yuma's partner and admits defeat. Allowing Yuma to leave from the emergency exit. Telling him he already has a great partner. Though the goodbye was still tearful and emotional. Even Eevee shed a few tears. It had began to get used to Shinigami's company. But it knew this would happen, but she would be missed. Eevee comforted Yuma until the fated goodbye kiss from her, as both of them left through the emergency exit.

Upon the Epilogue of the story, the final labyrinth, and Yuma getting his memory back after parting ways with Shinigami, he embraces his beloved partner as Eevee squeals in joy with it's beloved master's memory returned.

"Thank you, Eevee. Good work."

Eventually with his resign from the WDO and journey through the world to erase all unsolved mysteries, his Eevee eventually evolves into Umbreon during a case at night. Becoming ESPECIALLY more useful in night investigations. Using it's glowing rings to help navigate through the dark, AND it can now produce ultraviolet light to help investigate in crime scenes (in a way it became its own forte although its rings are blue it can also produce purple light) The duo was stronger than ever now that they've both evolved from the Kanai Ward experience, together.

The Noir Detective and his Partner of the Night~🔎

(Yuma and Eevee were more like business partners when he was Number One with it as his partner, but the journey through Kanai Ward made Yuma love and care for Eevee as a friend, and thus post game when Yuma appreciates Eevee more with his memories back from the experience, the friendship evolution finally happens. The Journey helped them both grow as individuals, and as friends)

[i-am-dulaman]

[long post]

So the other night I was talking to the most insufferable first year business student who insisted trickle down economics was great. He for some reason was, in the middle of a night club, trying to convince me we need more tax cuts for the rich.

Anyway, ignoring that, he has annoyed me into finally doing the research into something called a worker cooperative which has been in the back of my mind for a while now.

So a worker cooperative is essentially a company which is owned by the people who work there. They either elect their own management or, for smaller firms, make management decisions democratically, and they all share in the profits. This is opposed to consumer cooperatives where the business is owned by its customers.

So with that in mind there are two things you need to know:

New Zealand is the only post-industrialized country whose agricultural sector has grown, and its the fastest growing sector of the NZ economy. 

5 of the largest agriculture businesses in NZ are cooperatives, including Fonterra, NZ’s largest company which accounts for ONE THIRD of the ENTIRE WORLDS dairy trade.

Now none of those agriculture companies are actually true worker cooperatives, they’re usually only owned partly by their workers and not all workers have a stake in the company either. For example Fonterra is owned by 11000 of its dairy farmers but has over 10000 other employees who are not owners. But it’s close enough.

So is it a coincidence the best performing sector of the NZ economy is dominated by cooperatives? I have no idea. im just looking at the numbers. But its an interesting correlation.

Worker cooperatives are actually very rare in the world, but there has been some research done on them, particularly in Italy and France and here are some highlights:

They are much more resilient, with the chance of shutting down in its first 3 years of operation between 30% and 50% lower than normal companies when fully controlled for industry/size/etc. 

During the 2008 recession, worker cooperatives in france saw a 4% increase in employment while the unemployment rate in france rose by 0.7%

Salaries were slightly lower on average in France however other studies also showed salaries being slightly higher. This is likely due to the pay distribution, where the CEOs salary will be much lower in a cooperative compared to a CEO in a normal company, thus bringing down the average.

Cooperatives are 6-14% more productive

Employees are much more committed to their work

So in other words, they work.

What’s more is it keeps the profits of the company in the local economy, with all the money going to the workers, instead of shareholders who could be anywhere in the world and would likely just put the money into savings.

However the main draw back is it is hard to get the startup funds to start new companies. Most companies of course start off small with only a handful of workers which means each would need to invest a significant amount of their own money. But I’ll address this problem further below.

Anyway so what’s my point here?

Make every company a worker cooperative by law. That’s my point. Not a 100% worker cooperative, but a law that makes every single company in NZ pay its employees 50% of its profits, on top of their regular salaries.

Now im not an economist so idk anything about this subject. I’m just a socialist who has worked for the government before so i know how inefficient true communism can be when the government owns every business, but i have also worked in a private business that could afford to pay everyone an extra $250,000 but instead gives 1 billion dollars to our australian owners and kept us short staffed and underequiped.

so i wanted an alternative, and this is what i’ve come up with just fooling around with numbers and hypotheticals.

So I would love to see an actual economists take on this, not that i expect to find one on tumblr lol i’m just writing this here cause idk where else to write my thoughts.

So why only 50% of profits instead of 100%?

I think compromise is important. Every revolution failed because of a lack of compromise. revolutionaries pushed the revolution further and further to the extreme which pushed away moderates and sparked counter-revolutionaries. Keeping it to 50% means maybe more moderates will be on board. Keeping it to 50% also means investors are still motivated to invest and receive returns, which solves the biggest problem with worker cooperatives.

I’ve gone and looked at 40 of the largest companies (by revenue, number of employees, or net profit) in NZ, and calculated what it would look like if they paid their employees 50% of their profits evenly. These companies represent about 10% of the NZ workforce.

Note that some companies can literally afford to pay ALL of their employees HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of dollars and still keep 50% of their profits. One can even afford to make every single one of its employees a millionaire. (also note that some of this data is even from 2020/2021 with covid severely damaging the economy)

This averages out to $28000 per person. The median income of NZ is $53,000, so that would mean a sudden 52% increase in salary on average.

Not for nothing, it would also lead to an enormous amount of money in circulation, as people with more money will buy more things, and give the economy a massive boost. (The opposite of trickle down economic. Suck it first year business dude.)

I think a law like this would provide a sudden and drastic redistribution of wealth.

And i think it’s worth the time/brainpower of someone who knows more about economics than me.

[irl-dogboy]

idk why im getting so invested in adult! cade & charlie shenanigans specifically but here we go

-i LOVE the idea that everyone assumes that cade and charlie are dating because “y’know... two dudes sharing a house in a distant country and caring for dragons together? sounds gay” and cade is literally amazed that they thought of this and is just like “y.. you know the sanctuary is more than just charlie and i right??? RIGHT??? WE DONT EVEN WORK IN THE SAME BRANCHES OF THE RESERVE. FELIX IS HERE THIS ISNT BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN”

- at some point in time it was the ultimate confusion: everybody assumes that cade and charlie are dating. cade and charlie pick up on it and ‘pretend’ (not really they just act super affectionate) to be dating because they think their friends are just joking around. friends continue believing fake relationship. cade and charlie continue going along with the ‘joke’. cycle continues until cade mentions a guy he started dating that isnt charlie????!!!! :^OOOOOO

- yea they live together, they work pretty similar shifts at the reserve so they tend to be in at the same time. sometimes after one of them have had a particularly long shift, theyll both just settle in for a couple hours and nap on the couch w each other. they WILL patch each other up and help each other out when they get badly injured. one time charlie tore his acl and the weeks while it was healing cade took his holiday time and cared 4 him :^))) )))

- cade goes on an exhibition to somewhere far away for like 3 or 4 months and while they kept in contact both of em were relatively down. although to make up for it, cade returns with a little domesticated dragon screaming “I CHECKED AND FOUND LEGAL LOOPHOLES WE CAN KEEP HER” charlie flips his shit and all of a sudden? they have dragon daughter. her name is saskia and she gets lots of love from her two dads

- they go to bill and fleur’s wedding together to people watch & cause harmless trouble bc its been years since theyve been in a place with more than like 150 people. when they come together two days early it’s like “OH MY GOD YOU TWO FINALLY GOT TOGETHER” “what no its just cheaper to travel at the same time. also meet saskia” “CHARLES WEASLEY YOU ARE NOT BRINGING A REAL DRAGON INTO MY HOUSE”

- cade helping charlie come out to everyone as aroace YEAAA!!!! they invite everyone over for Charlie’s birthday and he’s like “ok guys i have an announcement” “oh my god the relationship revea-” “no im aroace” cue realization for everyone, it all comes together while cade does a happy dance in the background because hes proud of charlie

- anybody that has an interest in cade must be approved by charlie sorry that’s just the rule ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ its called “the charlie test” and cade doesn’t mind bc usually charlie is a good judge of character but sometimes they fight about it like “ITS JUST THIS ONE GUY HES SO HOT CHARLES” “HES WEIRD I DONT LIKE HIM”

- basically they’re qpp and u can pry them from my cold dead hands LOL

[skeletonwoman]

9. Cinema At Its Finest

honeslty, christmas movies are wyld and they literally all have the same casts and it’s just so impressive. also. this one is abt THEO RAEKEN AND EXCuse the horrific text talk but as that old text post says “its hard to make the words go [etc etc] so text speak easier or something” idk i can’t quote it perfectly whatever

You grimace as the delightful song starts filtering through your speakers. The credits are rolling, the girl got the guy, everyone is happy and the world is right.

And now you’re here, alone.

Snatching your phone from beside you, you open a text window.

Me: I mean

Me: Fr

Me: like I want a boyfriend so f*kn bad my guy

Me: But like I don’t

Me: I am strong and f*kn know that guys are bullshit

Me: but also pls love me

Me: y’know?

Me: like I f*kn hate movies but like

Me: ugh

Theo: u know I died and don’t have emotions anymore, right

Me: suck a dick

Theo: bby love me

Theo: why u text me anyway? Ur friends w girls

Theo: do u want me???

Me: ……………….ya lol take me now theodore raken

Theo: I came out to have a good time and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now

Snorting, you beam at your phone before sighing and sitting up. Maybe you should’ve texted Lydia or Malia but they wouldn’t get it. A stupid notion, of course, everyone gets those feelings after movies but…

You grimace at the title before shoving to your feet and leaving the random holiday themed movie and your laptop behind.

“I’m here, I’m here, you can all relax,” you call, coming to a stop in the center of the room and Scott sighs.

“Finally!” Liam cheers, jumping to his feet and you turn to him with a smile, only to frown as he runs past you. “Pizzas here, guys!”

Scowling, you slump into his seat and sigh. Beside you, Theo grins at you before flopping back against your chest. You grunt at the sudden pressure but allow him to pull your arm over his front anyway.  You'd press a kiss to his forehead or something equally romantic and adorable if he wasn't wearing a Santa hat. As it is, you're having a tough time blowing the pompom away from your nose.

“That’s my seat,” Liam whines and you smirk at him.

“You wanna take my place?” You ask, nodding at Theo and he hesitates.

“I’d like to take Theos place,” he mutters under his breath and Theo growls, his clawed hand settling on your thigh possessively.

“Don’t talk to me or my undead son ever again,” you counter and Liam harrumphs but takes a seat across the room. “As your penance, you will get me a slice.”

“What? What’d I do?” Theo whines, already climbing from the circle of your arms to grab the pizza.

“You had a little peeing contest on me. It was gross.”

He hums, peeking at you over his shoulder and grinning. “Must be why you’re so stinky.”

“Honestly, I’m so freaking over you,” you growl, opening your arms as he lays back against you and taking the slice from his hand. “You’re a nightmare and a pain in the ass.”

“Hey,” he says with a scowl and you glare. “I won’t respond to your boyfriend texts next time.”

“Is that a threat?”

“Obviously.”

Beaming through your misty eyes, you set your laptop aside and snatch up your phone.

Me: wjy r all the movies abt boys

Me: like I love elle sm

Me: but im totally that other girl who snaked her in the beginning

Theo: wtf

Me: Legally Blonde

Theo: wtf x 2

Me: I want a bf n not a christmas themed one :/

Theo: just ask me out already jeez

Me: smd hoe I also want a dog and maybe a law degree

Me: def a dog and a law degree

Me: a bf could probs wait

Theo: ur killing my vibe

Me: What vibe? R u out w/out me????

Theo: I was napping

Me: sounds abt right. Come over 2mororow?

Theo: ok, feed me snakcs

Muttering to yourself, you stare at the elevator doors and wait. Clunky, industrial and orangey brown, they creak open and you step inside.

“Wait!” A voice calls and you hold the doors open, spotting Theo coming through the lobby doors. “Ah, my sweet, sweet were-pig.”

“I’m a were-tiger if I’m anything, mutt,” you hiss and he laughs, stepping in beside you. “Sucks about our plans.”

“We were probably just going to end up napping,” he says reasonably and you hum an agreement. “This is something to do.”

“I’d rather be at home napping.”

“Yep, me too.” He sighs and you grin. For a moment, you’re caught in his blue gaze and the doors slide open.

“Oh- hey! Come on in, guys,” Stiles calls from the doorway and you blink, frowning at the decided lack of holiday decorations in the interior of the apartment.

“Come on,” Theo whispers, his arm settling over your shoulders and tucking you into his side. As a pair, you waltz past Stiles and into Dereks lair. Definitely a lair considering the lack of holiday joy.

“You guys took long enough,” Malia complains and you sink down onto the couch beside her, Theo still glued to your side.

“I was doing stuff and didn’t see the message,” you mumble and Theo smiles lazily instead of responding.

“Anyway,” Scott says, clearing his throat and blushing, “we have a lot to talk about.”

Theo: girl

Theo: girl

Theo: girl

Me: I have a f*kn name

Theo: ok girl

Me: what u want, snake

Theo: mood.

Theo: y’know that mood. When post movie that’s cute or someshit

Me: omfg

Theo: my emotions aren’t as dead as my body

Me: ur boddy is very alive so

Theo: ikr fml

Me: aw boo

Laughing, you tuck the phone under your pillow and snuggle down among the blankets. This winter weather is just delightful, perfect for naps.

Stretching, you lean into the warm blankets and sigh. When they sigh back, you can’t help gasping and flailing. Kicking something, you hear a recognisable grunt and groan.

“Theo?”

“You didn’t text me back,” he whines and you roll over and cringe. A pillow crease has left a red line down his cheek and you watch it disappear, fading like a scar over time- though in hyper speed. Why is he here?

“So you broke into my house and climbed into my bed while I was asleep?” He makes a softly protesting noise but doesn’t voice a denial. Instead, he gives you a sad look and cuddles just that little bit closer.

“I wanted to hang out,” he says softly and you grunt noncommittally. Who cares about hanging out- you were napping.

“Liam exists.”

“Liam doesn’t like me.”

“Scott.”

“You know,” he starts, voice getting serious and you push your leg between his calves. “The pack only tolerates me cause you like me. None of them actually like me, they actively dislike me.”

“That’s crazy of them-”

“Thank you.”

“Thinking I like you. Why would I like you?” You tease and he growls. The sound draws a smile from your lips, only for a laugh to escape your belly when he turns his fingers into claw shapes and digs them into your sides. “Ah! Werewolf hands!”

Your bluff works but only for a moment when he pauses, pulling his hands back and inch to check. Proven wrong, he digs his entirely human fingers and nails into your sides once more.

“N- not fair!” You gasp out, shrieking another laugh. His grin is savagely delighted and you’re about to shove him off you when a knock on your door has the both of you freezing.

“Kiddo?”

“I’m alive! All good! I saw- uh, a really good vine. Patrick Charlton…” You answer awkwardly, silence following your words as Theo fights to contain a laugh. Smacking a palm over his mouth, you clutch him to your chest and wait.

“Okay, don’t wake the neighbours.”

“Will do!” You agree quickly and heave a sigh of relief as footsteps sound down the hallway. Theo snickers against your hand and you bare your teeth at him.

“You absolute rat,” you snarl, still holding him tight to your chest and you feel him grin under your hand.

“You’re the one who couldn’t keep quiet,” he muffles and you have to let him go or you’ll break his neck.

“So you two aren’t dating?” Lydia stares, a crease between her eyebrows and an uncomprehending look in her eyes. All around the room stare similar expressions.

“No! What? I would never.” You scoff, looking down when you feel Theo twist around and look up at you. Your arms hang over his shoulders and down his chest, his back against your stomach and his head pillowed on your chest. Or it was, moments ago. No Santa hat this time though- because he'd stuck it on your head instead.

“Rude!” He gapes, glaring at you. “What do you mean never?”

“What do you mean what do you mean never?”

“I thought my question was pretty clear.”

“And I thought I was too. Why? Do you want to date me or something?”

“What the f*ck? Gross, no.”

“Okay, what the f*ck do you mean by gross?”

“So you guys aren’t dating?” Malia puts in but you can’t even look away at this point. Theo. Theo just called you gross.

“You can’t get angry, you said you wouldn’t date me,” he argues and you blink at him, looking him up and down- sort of.

“I didn’t- I would but like…”

“What does “but like” mean?”

“It means what it means, jeez, back off,” you snap, pushing him off you but you can’t get him to budge too far. He’s too invested in this awfully embarrassing and public conversation. In fact, he rolls over completely so his chest is pressed to your belly and his arms are around your waist.

“So… Definitely not dating?” Scott asks and you spare him half a glare.

“Well we are now,” you grumble, glaring at your spectators, spectators who happen to be very interested in the various pulls of thread on their clothes.

“What do you mean “we are now”?”

“It means exactly what I said, honestly, I know dying can kill parts of your brain but I didn’t think this was a symptom.” You scowl at him and he glares, begrudgingly rising to his hands and knees and pressing a soft kiss to your cheek.

“You’re such a bitch. All the f*cking time.” His words are a whisper, sweet and gentle to the ear and you shoot him a dark look. Stilling, you’re caught like a cobra in a song. The unadulterated affection on his face, written in his eyes, has you transfixed.

Wow.

as i schedule this fic, i am late to posting one from like 4 days previous woops

[3inghao]

HI CRUSH ANON HERE AND I WANT TO START OFF BY SAYING TO ALL THE PEOPLE THAT FEEL EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN MY LOVE LIFE I LOVE YALL HAHHAHHA I DIDNT EXPECT FOR ANY OF THIS TO HAPPEN :'))))) at the same time tho i feel like things might have to be put on hold for a while i dont know !!!! ok sorry sorry ill explain so ,, ive figured out that im like really really into this boy. in a way thats probably not the best for me right now, esp bc ive got a lot of things to juggle right now (1/17)

but also bc ive been thinking and like ,, ok so this story might put things more into perspective. so its like monday and i get a text from him thats just like ‘hey what are the rest of your classes for today/do you have like 15 min or something to be in a shoot of mine before it gets dark’ and im like PANICKIN bc ofc hes asked some of us to be models for his photography hw before and its always super casual BUT this is the first time that IVE ever been asked specifically (2/17)

and so obviously i jump at this offer and im like ‘umm i dont have any more classes today so sure just lmk when and what to do :) also whats the shoot about?’ and hes like ‘ok cool we can meet at your room at like 5:15 and ill tell you about the shoot when we meet up :)’ and he wanted us to go to this reaaaaally pretty park at sunset and do the shoot around that time and i was like ‘ok do u want me to wear anything specific’ and he was like ‘nothing in particular :)’ (3/17)

and so i start getting ready and im nervous af bc it meant spending more time alone with him and i felt so unprepared for that LMAO but yeah so he comes up to our room and i open the door and my heart skips a fucking BEAT and i almost slam the door in his face but i force myself not to aha and so we go and hes like ‘ugh im so tired i want coffee lets get coffee’ and so we went into the starbucks around the corner but then i was like yo will we make it to the park in time (4/17)

and hes like ‘o shit yeah’ so we leave without getting coffee rip but yeah we go to the city park and oh my gskldgskd it is so fucking pretty its right before sunset so everything is golden and the sky is rainbow but you can already see the moon and holy one of the prettiest views i think i have EVER seen !!!!! and then he explains to me what the project is finally and hes like so its an experimental photo set thats supposed to represent all the things we left behind in modern society (5/17)  

and so for me he said he wanted me to pose in the city park at sunset sitting on a bench with my hands cupped like i was holding a heart (hes going to photoshop the heart in later when hes editing the pics) and then like leave it behind on the bench and look at the sunset behind me which is supposed to represent and i quote “leaving love behind in the pursuit of beauty” and i literally was like 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 the whole time LMAOOOOOOO (6/17)

but yeah so we did that in like 15 min but after we were done i legit didnt want to leave bc (i wanted to spend more time with him but also) IT WAS SO FUCKING PRETTY SKDHJDFH and ahhhh i like looked over at him and he looked sooo at peace just like looking out over the water and the sunset and the scenery was so beautiful i almost blurted out hi i think ur beautiful but i stopped myself in the nick of time thank god LOOOOOL (7/17)  

but he like made eye contact with me and i like held myself together but there was a moment where i felt like djdhskjdkd idk how to describe it i was kfskshdhdjdh idk it could be just my imagination but I FELT LIKE THERE WAS SOMETHING THERE AHHHHHHHH and i was so tempted to ask him about the hand holding on saturday but i didnt i held myself back again thank god lol and then all of a sudden he goes ‘hey do u want pics’ and im like wot (8/17)

and hes like ‘do u want some pics of urself? like we r already here so !! plus i want some photos to put on my photography insta’ and i was like sljkddjkd ok why the hell not so he directs me into different poses and stuff like that and after the sun sets we finish and then we r walking back bored af so we start wandering around the little shops nearby and then we finally get home and then our friend texts the group chat like ‘hey anyone want dinner now’ (9/17)

and we were already really close to a dining hall so the two of us went and got dinner and our friend just joined us later and then during dinner when it was just the two of us we started talking about me losing the bet of when our friends were gonna hook up and so i have to treat him to japanese bbq and we were talking about when and hes like ‘well theres nothing im gonna celebrate for a while except my best friend from home is coming bc her sisters getting married here” (10/17)

and i was like ‘omg thats great ??? congrats to her !!!! omg’ but idk this is where it gets kind of confusing bc idk we were talking about maybe going this weekend but his best friend was coming and he was planning on spending all his time with her but i think he said that we could go get japanese bbq with her too ?? and i think i said ok but i dont think we locked down any like specific date and time at all ??? this part is a lil confusing to me (11/17)

so anyways that happened and i havent really interacted with him after that whole thing like we still have a streak on snapchat lol but he will do this thing where he wont open or respond to my snapchats for like literal hours ,,, even though i know hes ON snapchat bc he will like watch my stories ??? like w o t ???? i dont think hes doing it on purpose if that makes sense ?? but its still annoying and borderline infuriating and sldkghsldkgh (12/17)

and also like ok ,, his best friend came like yesterday and i saw her on his snapchat story and h o l y g o d she is the most beautiful girl on all of fucking planet earth i shit u not like i actually !!!! screamed when i saw her shes so fucking gorgeous and on his story theres a bunch of snaps of the wedding etc and a pic of him and her in a photobooth and sldkgsldkghs holy ???? i dont know how to put this into words but they are p e r f e c t for each other (13/17)

like in every way possible they are literally best friends and shes an actual goddess and together they look sooooo aesthetically pleasing it is legitimately intimidating and ahhh sldkgldgkh so the thing is !!!!! i already have practically no self esteem left ,, and a dinner with like HER and THEM will probably d e s t r o y m e from the inside out i will literally just feel inferior in every single way possible and i have NO IDEA HOW TO EXPLAIN THIS UGH !!!!!! (14/17)  

but yeah that kinda just made me realize that i might need to take a couple steps back ??? from this entire thing and him in general ,, and also that before anything happens i really want to work on me first like obv x has got his shit together and theres that whole thing with his best friend and idk !!! i like have pledged to go to the gym way more and get my fucked up sleep schedule back to some resemblance of normal and f o c u s on my academics and skincare and eating more healthy !! (15/17)

like i wanna be a person that everyone can look at and be like yes !! u go girl shes got her shit together and yeah !!!! aha :’) and also i need to COOL IT with my feelings about x like as amazing as he is and as fun as it is to spend time with him and as much as i want to pursue everything about this relationship i dont think im in a place mentally and emotionally where i can handle that so !!!!!! for now im gonna (try to) just distance myself a lil (16/17)

and yeah !! if he asks to go out for japanese bbq tonight/tomorrow i think im just gonna be like ‘ahh i wish i could but im super swamped with work rn sorry :(((‘ (which is 100000% true) and just leave it at that *deep sigh* anyways thats where i am at this point thanks for tuning in yall aha :’) i just need to not be hurt in this relationship and distancing myself for now is the only way i know how to prevent that ,, and i probably wont be that successful but !!! heres to trying :) (17/17)

awwwwwwwww crush anon BUT THE SUNSET DATE (yes im calling it a date) does his best friend go to the same college as you guys?? bc if he’s single and she doesn’t live anywhere near him there probably really isn’t anything between them that you need to worry about. I def support the focusing on yourself bc the more confidence you have in yourself the less insecure you will be once you actually get into a relationship so go you!! my gf and i are actually starting to facetime each other and work out together too so all of us can struggle in that tryin to be healthier lyfe! i think in one of the other asks you mention more happened? but i also think that maybe a bbq date with him wouldn’t be bad? and i think you should try to have it with just him and no one else! idk fill me in on any new developments :0