#im nvr gonna get this out of my head

[2knightt]

IM SO SORRY TO BOTHER YOU MY LOVE, BUT I HAD A GREAT FIC IN MIND

okay okay so basically the Curtis have a sister (which isn’t the reader) ANYWAYS the Curtis is sister is friends with us and the Curtis family knows us bc they see us as there sister too ykwim? BUT WE HAVE NVR MET THE GANG AND WHEN WE DO JOHNNY (or anyone u also want) HAS A CRUSH ON US. 😱

sorry I got a little ahead of myself 😛 but yeah 😚

↳she’s just like candy!₊˚✧

➬ johnny cade x fem!reader

a/n;i did fem!reader, hope that’s alright!! and U DIDN’T GET AHEAD OF YOURSELF I LOVE LONG REQS!! and i love seeing you in my inbox<3 i spent most of my time talking abt the gang..ruh roh.

you and aaliyah had been friends since grade school!

the two of you are attached to the hip, the moon to her sun!

you’re always at her house, studying, gossiping, everything!

you’ve met her brothers, they’re all real sweet to you!

your favourite out of the bunch is probably sodapop.

he’s the type of guy to gossip with the two of you.

“and then beth started to pretend that she never dated david!”

“she what?!”

“who’s beth again? is it the blond one?”

“yes, soda.”

“SHE DID NOT.”

you always hear aaliyah talk about the “gang” and you can’t help but ask about them every time, but you always get the same response.

“you wouldn’t want to meet them. they’re total idiots. imagine 3 sodapops but ones a violent drunk, a criminal, and his best friend.”

“but you talked about 4 other guys before. who’s the other one?”

“johnny cade. he’s the best one there, possibly.”

that’s the most you ever heard about the gang, other than the insane stories you hear.

you’ve always wanted to meet them! but aaliyah always said, “nah, at least one of ‘em would fall head over heels for you. i ain’t tryna have either one of ‘em steal my best friend!”

one day after school, you were walking to her house together, had a huge test coming up, so you thought it’d be good to study together.

well—that was before some drunkard wearing a mickey mouse shirt came busting into your friends room.

“hey aaliyah! wait, who’s that?!”

“my literal best friend?”

“aww-”

“you have other friends than us?”

aaliyah turned her head to face you with possibly the most unamused face you’ve ever seen and mouthed ‘can you believe him?’

you chuckled at their bickering as the man walked up behind you two and threw his arms around your necks to bring you closer to him.

“ain’t you gonna introduce me?”

“no. she’s MY friend, back off two-bit.”

your eyes widened, it was nice to finally put a face to a name after all this time.

it was a miracle that you didn’t know any one of them, but whatever.

you smiled and turned to face two-bit.

“i’m y/n, it’s lovely to finally meet you.”

“AND SHE’S A SWEETHEART. how could you not introduce us..she had to do it herself! you’re so rude!”

he shouted as he backed off and put a hand on his heart as he fake-fainted onto aaliyah’s bed.

“two-bit, sodapop told me to tell you—oh, who’s your friend?”

some guy asked as he stood at the door way.

he looked dirty, had what looks like cake all over his mouth, had no shirt on, and looked like he breathed in hair grease.

“that’s y/n! aaliyah’s FRIEND we ain’t know about!”

“can you guys leave us alone??”

the dude in the doorways mouth slowly opened wide as he shouted,

“SODA!! WHEN WERE YOU GONNA TELL ME OUR SISTER HAS OTHER FRIENDS?!”

you then heard loud stomping towards the room.

“STEVE YOU MEAN, *MY* SISTER? and that’s y/n. she’s the best. introduce yourself to her.”

and introduce himself he did!

he extended his arm out and smiled, with chocolate cake all over his teeth.

“steve randle!”

the curits sister leaned over and whispered in your ear as you were about to take his hand to shake,

“i wouldn’t take that. i can’t remember the last time i seen his willingly wash his hands.”

with that new found knowledge, you slowly put your hand away, smiling and nodding at him.

“y/n l/n.”

“WELL, Y/N..COME MEET THE REST OF THE GANG!”

two-bit shouted, hopping off aaliyah’s bed.

“if you take her to see dallas, so god help me, two-bit.”

“too late.”

he basically sung as he dragged you into the living room of the house where the three brothers your familiar with sat with two boys you were unfamiliar with.

“hey y/n!”

“hi sodapop.”

you greated him as the other brothers waved at you.

“who’s this?”

“dallas, c’mon.���

whispered the dude, who was smaller than the rest, sitting next to ponyboy.

the ‘dallas’ stood up and walked directly infront of you, to look you up and down.

“you don’t know me, sweetheart?”

“..nah.”

“leave her alone, dal.”

the quiet kid said, almost shaking in his seat as dallas kissed his teeth and shook his head.

he walked off out of the house for some reason.

you made your way towards the only guy you didn’t know, but you can use context clues.

that must be johnny cade, the ‘best one there’

“hey, thank you. i’m y/n.”

“i heard, i’m, uh johnny.”

johnny thought you were beautiful from afar, but when you’re upclose and smiling at him, you were like a greek goddess.

your eyes shinned real bright, even though the curtis’s lighting wasn’t that good.

your features suited the rest of you, complimenting every inch of ya.

johnny couldn’t muster anything but his name when he saw you.

“Y/N! COME BACK, I CAN’T HOLD STEVE OFF ANYMORE!”

“AALIYAH I AM NOT FINISHING YOUR DIRTY WORK.”

“FAKE MOTHERFUCK-”

you rolled your eyes as you walked back to your friends room, waving goodbye to the boys on the couch.

johnny waved back, with a lovestruck look in his eyes.

“someones whipped, huh?”

ponyboy whispered in his ear as he nudged his friend, with a grin.

“man, shut up!”

maybe he was whipped.

he started goin’ to the curtis house when school ended just for a chance to see you.

and it worked—sometimes.

but when it did, he always tries to have at least 10 minutes of your time.

“he-hey y/n! come here for a minute..please?”

“sure, johnny! what’s up?”

“nothin’, just wanted to ask how you were.”

he checks his appearance more than ever since you met him.

started carrying around those combs you see greasers use in the movie ‘grease.’

he totally just, stares at you, when you’re around.

the gang sees it and knows johnny has a little thing for you.

and so does the curtis sister.

“what did i tell ya?! i told you one of them would fall head over heels for you, AND ONE OF ‘EM DID!”

johnny goes out of his way to show up to school every once and awhile for you.

shit, it’s happened so much the two of you started hanging out, PRIVATELY!

he legit pictures your guys ‘dates’ before they happen.

he likes you so much, its SICKENING.

making me sick just writing about it.

now, even you yourself has to admit that johnny cades a cute lookin’ guy.

and johnny KNOWS you’re a cute girl, and the gang sure as hell knows that he thinks that.

“look johnny, it’s your girlfriend.”

“DALLAS, SHUT UP.”

may 22nd, 2023. 11:42PM

[fruitsilly]

10 people you want to know better (tagged ppl are under no obligation to do this <3!!)

thank you jude @pansyfem for tagging me! this looks like fun :3

relationship status: single, but heavily lushing/meshing (the sensual/alterous equivalents of crushing respectively) on this guy in my class at uni rn. and i really. Really want him to be my boyfriend holy fucking shit he's so cute. anyways. i also have a milder squish on a girl who's also in my class. i have two exes but i am aromantic and since they were romantic relationships which needed reciprocation they didn't work out. i am still friends with one of my exes (who's also arospec) tho so it's all good!! :•D

favourite colours: my top 5 fave colours are

green

purple

pink

yellow

blue

in that order :)

favourite foods: ough pasta. any kind of pasta really but i am especially partial to lasagne. i also love cheese and pizza. oh and how could i forget!!! millionaire's shortbread!!

song stuck in my head: TOXIC BY BRITNEY SPEARS!!!!!!!!!! although before this it was the borgia family horrible histories song :)

last thing you googled: i use firefox bc im swag so technically i duckduckgo'ed this Anyways. i searched for the tv show "you" bc i saw a gifset from that show featuring a lady i am incredibly bi for and i was like 👀 will i have to watch this now

time: 9.32PM (im gonna write the time of posting this bc i wrote this in my notes app)

dream trip: spain or scotland!! spain bc im learning spanish and scotland bc it's just such a lovely country <3

last thing you read: "the children" by lucy kirkwood! it's a play im reading for my course :)

last book you enjoyed reading: ugh i haven't had the capacity to actually sit down and read a physical book for... too long it's been ages. it's mostly to do with my disabilities and time :( i started reading good omens on my phone but i didn't finish it (i like it so much better than the show lmao). but the actual physical book i read last was "death sets sail" by robin stevens, the final book in her "murder most unladylike" series. ough. ive been with that book series from literally the very beginning. id highly recommend 👍

favourite thing to cook/bake: sadly i don't do enough cooking or baking to know but what i have made is fudge which was quite fun! ive also made a delicious cheesy pasta bake hehe

favourite craft to do in your free time: again. i haven't had the capacity or time to actually make any art since like... march, so, 7 months. yeesh. i miss making digital art. id like to pick it up again but idk when that'll be. id also like to try and get a badge maker bc i have loads of ideas but ugh time is a problem. im just so busy at uni.

most niche dislike: im sure there's Something since im autistic and autism is the Strong Opinions Disorder but nothing's coming to me atm [shrugs]

opinion on circuses: ive only been to one in my life and i really enjoyed it apart from the clowns who i found scary but i was like 8 i think. im less scared of clowns now. also the general aesthetics of them fuck severely

do you have any sense of direction: hardly lol! i have a great photographic memory so even going a certain route once with someone who knows the way i can remember it HOWEVER i am utter shit at finding my way with a map on my own. google maps is always open when im trying to find a place and even then i frequently go in the wrong direction or miss a turning. i just cannot translate distance on a digital map to irl distance. don't even get me started on using a traditional map bc g-d above. id end up more lost than i was before. im excellent at just confusing the hell out of myself <3

tagging: @sillyspooky @skylightz @bromantically @transgenderpolyhedrals @folderone @gir-posting @nvr-pass-spookier-version @heartslobbf @taikacohen @laymedowninsheetsoflinen (plus anyone who sees this and wants to do it just say i tagged you ^_^). again no obligation to do this !! :)

[straightjacket111]

stop myself from everything. i know that wtv is in my head now that wants to do dat shit will hurt me more. so i stopped. i stop checking ur twitter and everything else. things i didnt stop was look at our pics. yes our pics. the moments we're happy. that hurt too. but doesnt hurts more like any other pain i felt. i became so tired now. i rarely get sleeps. somedays i js want to gtfo but idk where to go. somedays js cant stay sober and all of dat. idk wether for me is to be really is to go ghost. where i js dont talk to anyone and all of dat but.dats gonna be lonely. and im fine with dat. ive been lonely ever since. lonely where i suffer it on my own and everything else. like how it is rught now. with shits in my head . thibking and thinking non stop . bout those things ive been thru. but i nvr like thought bout dat we're never meant to be together or not. never . not a thought. but its always like mayb in another life or. in the future smtg like dat. but why did she say. dat. we're never going to be tgt again. and all of dat. im ngl i hide alot of my own pain. because im too scared of ppl taking advantage of me. like im too scared . dats why its harder now for me to let it out. im getting flashbacks of everything. idk. its tiring . its like i would rather die u know. idw to be a burden at the same time. but idk. i act as if like im happy. i act as if im fine. because. i js dw to be a burden. or someone take advantage of me.i guess i know why ive changed now. pain changes me.

damn its tiring really. even being in this house hurts me.

[tylenolnighttime]

Omg I just had the hottest thing happen to me.

[junipeach]

Its 6am and i cant stop Thinking.

[janexeu]

     though the mist might prevent some from seeing it, JANE MÁRQUEZ is actually a descendent of HYPNOS. it’s still a question of whether or not the TWENTY-SIX year old DEMIGOD ELEMENTARY EDUCATION MAJOR from NEW ORLEANS, USA has taken after HER godly parent completely, but the demigod is still known to be quite SACRIFICIAL & STUBBORN.

( she’s b-b-b-back on her bs : katya ! tis uhm ,,,, a lil bit of a chonk of an intro but ill try 2 b cute w it. any time u wanna yeet jus peep the gif again & forgive me bc Look At Her ! )

POWERS ( more info here )

hypnokinesis  — p much made her a glorified babysitter w lynch-esque wacko dreams. it got stronger naturally as she got older, but jus w herself n eventually the ppl shes real close w. its also gotten a lot better since comin to eonia 

seeing gods in dreams  — she doesnt hang out w em every fridays at tgifs but like ,,, if she had Pertinent Questions she cud smhw make it happen. found out abt her being a demigod at age 10 when she met hypnos

memory retrieval — shes got great memry of her own but bc she knows it can help w grief n all that, shes been learnin in eonia how to do it 4 others if they mayb wanted it

BIO POINTS 

her single ma died during childbirth so jane's been in the foster care system since 5ever. attempts at reunification nvr worked out but thankfully she got real lucky w her group home and foster families. twas stable enough to not emotionally scar her even further but the instability of it all was fosho a big ol’ lot and has influenced her rigidness in sum aspects of her life

she lived p much as a mortal even tho her powers r a lil freaky. never went to camp but it worked out bc all her abilities r internal and cannot be Perceived by others. she had a talk w hypnos abt what 2 do n he mentioned camps but also gave sum monster avoidance tips ( like rarely use ur powers, maybe learn self defense, yada yada ) n she jus ,,, did that so she cud continue livin real normal w the mortals. logistics of camp stressed her out esp bc shes livin w non-family n stuff yk it was All Too Much, miss her w the added demigod stress tyvm

got married at 23 to her childhood sweetums luis, but he ,,, died abt a yr later fr a car accident. coma for 2 weeks n jane p much slept the entire time in his hospital room, visitin his dreams n talkin to him. twas a life support sitch so they eventually decided to pull da plug whch was real sad but like she's processed it 2 da best of her abilities. her powers helped a lot in the coping too n she visits memories of him in her dreams smtms when it gets real sad then shes ok again bc life goes on n life is pretty uwu

bc of her bg round kids of all kinds, shes always been passionate abt em. always takin babysittin/tutor gigs and went to community college so she cud teach n then worked as an elem teacher. only started considerin goin 2 eonia 4 postgrad when she had a student who showed signs n strugglez of bein a demigod. she eventually got to talk to their godly parent 2 confirm n she was shocked pikachu meme, real concerned for all those youngins who hav no clue what to do ! or how to cope ! bc they cant facetime w the olympians lyk she can ! so cue her discussin eonia w luis a lot then a year after the accident, broke out the pro-con list again. took abt *checks watch* another yr til she finally decided to zoom 2 athens but then whoosh she did !

PERSONALITY

yearning ? idk her — shes can be a bit of a take it as is typa chick. can be a lil literal jsksj not dumb but like ,,, def doesnt read into things enuff to pine n long n year yk. some things might def fly over her head. she says Yes To Serotonin in this house. she dk the the mitskis n the sikens n the carsons ; its all mary oliver up in this joint. we just tryna luv life n be grateful folkz

le freak, say chic ! — control freak, that is. growin up in an unstable envi meant shed cling 2 stability n independence, wrvr she cud get it. so when it comes 2 the way she does things, she can be real a heel digger. also bc she has 2 deal w kids yk so it can b A Lot n shes v stern lyk dat. ofc she wont infantilize the eonians .,,,. or will she ? big sis vibes outta control. she means well tho always always means well. itll also b v hard to get her 2 giv up on sum1 bc life ? she luvs it n knows u can too

changes by david bowie — is decidedly skipped on the playlist. she doesnt like change !!! i mean she knows its inevitable but still not entire unavoidable. ever since she got out of the system, shes had a partner n her own way of doing things n its been workin out so why change it yk ? she says time may change me but jokes on u i can sorta trace time 

rip but im different — this goes out to all em whores in this house. she respectz ur hustle but like ,,,, not her thang. girl doesnt even get drunk when she drinks bc she doesnt rlly drink sksjsk doesnt like the taste of it, big baby ! but like she's Lived, its more like. ok tried it, not for me. thanks tho. also for all the meanies in the house, y’all perplex her. shes empathetic n wont show the judgement but smtms shes lowkey lyk .,., ur how old n u had all this goin 4 u n ur still so rotten ? how u actin like a 7yo w a trantrum ? scratch head, make it make sense

at least u tried — dad jokes, bad puns, tries to be big jokester but isn't funny. she's pretty tho so she gets away with it. idk wht else 2 say ur honor. shes the type thatll embarrass u w affection

well that was Awkward — probably sum1 abt her if  they see her actin a Fool bc shes in a foreign sitch or topic. when shes a fish outta water then she can be so ! easily ! flustered ! which is p much her in eonia. shes not new new but theres way 2 much godly shennanigans for her to wrap her head ‘round n sis has never gone to camp so its ice bucket challenge level shock from time to time still w da magics n lore

til death do us part — yknow when death cab for cutie said i knew that u wer a truth i wud rather lose than 2 hav nvr lain beside at all ? how abt when they wrecked me by rudely sayin love is watching sum1 die ? yes ? no ? nywy thats jane 4 ya. if she loves then shes in and if shes in then she is all in, luke danes stylez

was that a vivid enough picture or did i just word vom the same things agen n agen sjksjs jus know shes cute n sweet if a lil frustrating n annoying bc shes stubbornpants mcgee. may or may not have a slight compulsion to help fix other ppl ..,,.. someone set her str8 n tell her fix u by coldplay isnt it !!!  

OTHER INFO 

5′9″ born 4 october 1994, virgo sun n moon

not a freshie ! idk how long her program is but like ,,, lets ignore that 4 now ok jus kno that she been here a while

yogi & boxing enthusiast back at home. hc her mans got real into the martial arts w her when hypnos told her she gotta learn how 2 defend so that was one of their things : bonding by workouts so jane cud protecc herself if need be

her maiden name’s jane fulton. got her mommas surname but the name jane ? thats some jane doe bs some rando picked out for her which she hated at first but then seeing tarzan made her go hmmm, ok bet !

lgbtq+ alliance president ! identifies as pan

she met her late hubbie when they were abt 7ish, real friends 2 lovers cuteness. jane was there for him throughout his entire coming out & transition ergo her passion for the community esp queer kids bc she was That Cis Ally for her mans. wears her ring as a real lowkey necklace now

shes also real passionate abt sleep. will ask u how did u sleep last night p much every day u see her bc ppl spend like half their lives asleep catherine ofc shes gonna ask

her fave thing abt eonia ?  the whole siblings bit. shes had 2 make do w what she got n build a family from scratch so this ? she luvs it a lot let her give u kithes hypnos babies

shes p well versed in the greek thingies but only thru the knowledge mortals gets + dream info. after her realizin who she is, all things ancient greek jus sorta became her niche interest ykwim ? shes not like Super Learned abt it more like ,,, ok i gotta at least make Sum sense outta all this, gotta learn what i can. imagin how embarrassin it wud b 2 see a god in ur dream n then go : sorry to this man. nope. not jane, not her, nuh-uh 

luv languages : words, acts of service, physical touch !

useless hcs but she loves disney sfm ok. smtms dresses up as princess tiana for bday parties n shit bc shell do nythin 2 put a smile on the kids n babs faces

ya like jazz ? bc jane surely does ! adores motown & 60s music. nina simone owns her. no one drag peggy lee from 101 dalmatians ! not an important hc but i jus wanted to quote my bubble butt winged bee lover barry

POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS

children ! infants ! babies !

demigods that make her scratch head damn u live like this ? but also wud knife emoji to protect n care for. shes not the oldest on campus but shes been livin independently p much her entire life so she finks shes got a tight grasp on the myth that is Adulting  

srsly tho the Big Sis vibes is off the charts w this one. shell perserve u dumdums

baddie influencies !

convince her 2 get drunk at a party ! bc she never does. convince her to maybe try drugs ! or go hook up ! do smths impulsive idk jus smth new !

gl tho bc shes not rlly ,,, easily influenced But she can b reasoned w ! in general i fink its just gonna be a fun dynamic if y/m knows how to coax sum wildness outta her or w/e bc thotty yummy theyre hotty yolo rzning jus wont do w this gal. will most likely get argumentative like a big ol momma hen but if u win then ur winning big

Sleep Now or forever hold ur peace !

idk sum1 she helps w their messy sleep ? shes def not super public w it, surely knows her other siblings r Better at it but if  y’all are close, she probs enjoys doin it 4 ya. she runs her hair thru fingers a lot when she does it. like a lot a lot unless u tell her to get lost

lover boi, lover gorl, lover enby !

she can be a lil traditional when it comes to how she views rels. she wants all that meetcute courting bs ! no gender roles tho n u best be sure shes not constantly comparin w her late hubbie ,,, but she jus wants smth magical n 2 be wooed again yk ?

so yea ,,, crushers mayhaps ? sum1 who is tryin 2 woo her ? sum1 she had a meetcute w and now janes got lowkey heart eyes for em ? idk lotsa possiblities but pls keep in mind she is not good at the flirtings so hav mercy on her 

eonia tour guide !

or jus friends who like ,,, constnatly fill her in w all the godly stuff n whatnot. years of not goin 2 camps mean u miss out on a lot ! explore ruins w her n get her info her mortal educ didnt make her privy 2 yk 

head real empty atm i will think of sum n let y’all know when i do, but give us all the conekshunz. friends, enemies, the usual bit, lgbtq alliance peeps, lmk whats up whats done whats cookin we want it all

( shes p much a new muse n da result of me tryna bring in an emotionally healthy kid to this sad sad university. janes in a v good well-adjusted place rn n is my therapy muse bc that other bitch m** is a messy handful. but wbk life aint linear so mayhaps shit’ll hit da fan or one of y/m will ruin her lmfao press f pls ! but also color me eyes emoji bc we love to see it )

[taeminie]

hello i hope u don’t mind me i just need to SCREAM abt the sarawatine kiss scene. PRETTIEST KISS SCENE EVER FR. im usually not into kiss scenes at all im neutral at best. i had my fav bl before 2gether and when the main couple made out i couldnt even watch the whole scene bc i just .. idk.. i didn’t like it. BUT the sarawatine kiss?it lives in my head 24/7 rent free. i’ve nvr seen a more satisfying kiss. +the way win’s song comes in at just the right moment during the second kiss? poetic cinema

NO ANON I GET YOU!!! THAT KISS WAS PURE FIRE!! the thing is: it was so unexpected??? nobody absolutely nobody saw it coming.. so it felt like years of love and passion poured into it. it just felt like they just lost themselves in it and didn’t care about anything else. in my personal experience watching the finale i was gonna be content with a peck because i know they love each other already but like they really said nah we are MAKING OUT. lmao im very picky abt kisses in general but like that kiss was PRETTY. it was so beautiful their lips were harmonizing like??? it was insane. the first one was so soft and tender and sweet and then sarawat came in with that “kiss til u moan” line and really went for it. it was the perfect ending.

[nockfellblues]

I don't know if you do these kinds of asks but how about reader pulling a hunger games type moment and confronting Larry before he kills himself saying if you go I do too I won't let someone I love die alone type thing.

All aboard the angst train ♥  written as a mini fic! TW for attempted suicide! Reader is gender neutral.

If you are in crisis, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline and get the help you deserve. Call 1-800-273-8255. If you are like me and are afraid to call, there are also live online chat options as well, located HERE! 

You’d known for awhile something was... off with Larry. Ever since Sal had officially moved in with Todd and Neil, Larry had been stadoff-ish on a good day, and on bad days would seclude himself in the tree house, Sanity’s Fall blasting from that tiny stereo so loud you could hear it from your shared basement apartment. To say you were worried about his behavior was an understatement. Especially after you’d begun to notice the pattern of near constant headaches, the fact that he was always saying it was too loud in the apartment, the occasional mutter of, “shut up,” to an empty room when he though you weren’t close enough to hear, and the quickly worsening whip of anger he’d been developing… You were walking on eggshells at any given moment.

Finally, it all hit a breaking point. 

You had been helping Larry pack up the remainder of his non-essentials, getting them ready to go over to his new room at Todd’s. It had been a process to pack a lot of his stuff up- it was a whole lifetime to sort through; countless weird knick knacks to decide to keep or not, finding old drawings and sketchbooks from his childhood, finding a random little thing that had been lost years ago tucked away in a dusty corner someplace… 

To be honest, it had been more reminiscing about his childhood and the memories about each of the items you both went through than it was actually packing. But it was fun, and the wistful smile he wore as he told you stories of his mother, his missing father and his years of shenanigans with Sal and Todd made every wasted second well worth it. 

When you unearthed a little silver puzzle box, you expected a fun story and for him to add it into the donation box for the local second hand shop for some needy kid to enjoy it later. But the simple question of, “Trash or stash?” quickly devolved into an argument about how much you didn’t care about his sentimentality or that it was an important object to him- and it just got worse from there- until you gave up, tossed up your hands, and stated you were gonna bring the box you’d finished earlier over to Todd’s while he cooled off, and walked out.

When you’d gotten there, the first thing you did was tell Sal what was up, hoping maybe he’d have some kind of wise words or what you could have done to set Larry off in the first place. Sally, ever the sweetheart, pulled you into a gentle hug, reassuring you that Larry was probably just having a rough patch and that he would talk to him and see if Larry might open up about it. 

Taking Todd up on an offer to stay the night, you threw on a movie and made yourself comfortable on the couch, falling into a dreamless sleep. 

Neil woke you the next morning with a killer cup of coffee and a poor mans breakfast of sugar coated pop tarts. Sally had come around not long after, letting you know Larry had texted him, and they’d be headed to the apartments for some, “Ghost hunting.” He seemed kind of tense but reassured you that he’d talk to Larry today, before he met up with Ash. Of course, you’d thanked him, and settled into Larry’s soon-to-be room to start sorting out some of the easier boxes.

—–

You woke up later, sprawled on the couch, to the sound of Todd rummaging in the kitchen. Yawning, you stretched and made your way out to greet him, smoothing out your bead-head. 

“Hey Todd, how as class?” You asked, grabbing a seat at the kitchen table. 

Todd shrugged, idly stirring an instant noodle cup, “No complaints. How’s Larry’s room coming along? Sal said you were unpacking this morning.”

“Well, I made it through the clothes and some oddball boxes… Did Sally mention anything about Larry by chance?”

Todd shook his head, “No, but he left with Ash almost as soon as he was back, so we didn’t have much time to chat. Knowing Sal, things should be smoothed over. He’s always been able to mellow Larry out like that.” 

With that, you decided to head back and see if Larry was feeling any better after some Sally time. It was getting dark, and the thick clouds looming overhead finally opened into a sweeping downpour just after you had left Todd’s. You stopped under a thicket of trees just off the road, hoping the rain would lessen, when your cell phone went off. 

Larry: [Name] im rly sry. i nvr meant that shit i said.

[Name]: Dude its all good i know youre stressed lately. Im heading back now.

Larry: stay at todds. and just dont blame urself ok? its my time to go.

[Name]: Larry wtf are you talking about? youre scaring me?

Without waiting for a reply you took off towards the apartments at a breakneck run. Bypassing the front door, you ran around the backside of the building to use the back entrance, when you noticed a light on in the old tree house- Then your gaze trailed down to the baggy with a neatly folded paper pinned to the lower steps on the tree.

You felt your blood run cold. He wouldn’t- no. 

“Larry!” You scrambled up the rickety planks, ignoring the note, and all but threw yourself onto the tree house floor. “Larry, don’t!” 

Tucked against the wall of the tree house, just under the little window, sat Larry, an old camping lantern lit in the corner beside him. His eyes were puffy and his hair disheveled, evidence that he’d been crying before. Tears welled in your own eyes as you took in his distraught expression and the bottle of whiskey in his hands. 

“[Name]..?” He whispered your name, and the way his voice cracked brought you to instant tears, and you all but launched yourself at him, pulling him into a desperate embrace. 

“Larry Johnson, you fucking asshole! Don’t you dare- don’t you dare take a sip from that bottle-”

“[Name]-” you cut him off, taking his face into your hands and forcing him to look at you. The circles under his eyes were so deep, and the absolute emptiness in them broke your heart.

“No! You listen here, you fucking string bean- you don’t get to do this. You can’t just… just push me away and expect me not to worry. You can’t just text… text me something like that and not expect me to come running to- to fucking keep you from being stupid! What the fuck am I supposed to do without you?!” You were openly sobbing now, practically screaming at the boy who all but held your entire world in his hands. “You’re all I have! You can’t just-just leave me behind and expect me to move on- who am I without my other half, Larry? Who am I?!” 

He scrunched his eyes closed, tears streaming down his cheeks again, as he shook his head.

“If you fucking kill yourself, I’m going with you. And you can’t stop me.” You knew it was a dirty trick to play, guilting him like this when his soul was this ravaged and he was so vulnerable- but you were being honest. What would you do without him in your life? What about Sal? God, what about poor Lisa? He was so dear to you all, so loved, and he was ready and willing just throw it all away-

“[Name], I-I can’t take it anymore- I just- the cult shit, that demon, the ghosts! The fucking whispers-  they’re dri-driving me insane! I‘m not like you or Sal- I can’t handle this shit anymore!” He finally breaks down into heaving sobs at that, burying his face into your shoulder, and dropping the bottle in favor of a bone-crushing embrace that you readily return.

You kick the bottle away from Larry, as far as you can get it, and quietly thank whoever will listen when the cap pops the rest of the way off, spilling the amber liquid and the mostly dissolved remnants of pills onto the tree house floor.

“…Why didn’t you just tell me? Or even Sal. Someone. You know we’d do anything for you, Larry, absolutely anything.” He didn’t reply, just shook his head and pulled you closer. What the fuck was was this place doing to him? You had to get him out- get him away- Larry’s phone vibrated from the other side of the tree house, but you elected to ignore it, praying whoever was calling was also smart enough to find you both before things got any worse.

He sniffled, hiccuping into you shoulder, “I’m so sorry, [name]. I didn’t mean anything that I said the other day- or anything I said in those other arguments. I just- This- this place is.. I think I’m going crazy-”

You shushed him, smoothing a hand down his hair and he devolved into body-wracking sobs that shook you both with the sheer force of them. Your soul ached for the boy you had known almost all your life- the boy you grew up with, shared secrets with, made countless memories with, and loved with all your heart. 

Why didn��t you see this coming sooner? “I know, Larry, I know. This place- there’s something still wrong with Addison apartments and we’re gonna get you out of here, forever. I promise.” 

“I-I’m so, so sorry, [name]. Please... Please don’t leave me.”

The rain continued to pour in violent sheets outside, but you distinctly heard the frantic voice of Sal, calling Larry’s name, as he ran towards the tree house. You had never felt such absolute relief in your life, even with Larry clinging to you like a lifeline, and the stain of his near-death slowly seeping into the floor of the tree house just behind you.

 “I’m not going anywhere, Larry. I’m with you, always, no matter what happens.”

—fin—

WHEW. I tried to make it so you could read their relationship as either romantic or platonic, and tried to stay as neutral as possible in gender as well! I hope this is alright, and I hope you like it! I’ve actually never seen the Hunger Games so I kinda went my own way ♥

I’d also like to use this space as a PSA:I’ve struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts and tendencies my whole life- don’t let your depression convince you that you are trapped or alone or unloveable. I know its hard, and there’s no easy fix for it, but there are things in life that make it worth sticking around. Even if its something as silly as looking forward to a new game or story or waiting for a flower you planted to bloom, there are reasons to keep living. Please be kind to yourself and remember, even if we’ve never spoken or interacted or existed in the same space, I know that you are worthy of being loved and cared for and you are not alone. 

If ever you feel like you are truly alone in this world, please reach out- there will always be people out here willing to lend a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold, and a friend to those who feel lost ♥ I know i will always be open to anyone out there in need of a friend so, please, never be afraid to reach out!

[projectshadovv]

Can you tell us more about your fursona?

im gonna assume you mean Blank, my albino white shepherd!

Blank’s original name was Raven. i wanted a “dark” name to contrast her light appearance, like Shadow, or Shade, or Coal, or Smokey, but i went with Raven, i dont know why but i did!

i chose a white german shepherd because i was currently obsessed with Bolt, the disney movie!! its still one of my all time fav movies. 

I made her super plain white, turquoise eyes taken from the anime character Toshiro Hitsuguaya from Bleach (i always thought his eyes were the most BEAUTIFUL shade of blue EVER...)

i was also really into bandanas and camo patterns, specifically gray camo, thus ending up with THIS:

she wasn’t my main fursona then, i had a different character, but she was one of the many i had. i didnt draw her much, cause i liked complicated, fun designs, and she wasnt all that fun to draw. i mostly drew her in vent art cause it was the easiest, and she was more of a serious character (dont let that smile fool you)

When i finally up’d her to my main sona, i added a SHIT load of gear to her. this was during the era of making fun of wolf a boos and sparkledogs. they were major cringe, and i took great pride in NOT having such a colorful, blinding character. but she was STILL boring to draw, so what did i do?

GEARED HER UP BABEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i LOVE wearing hats, ofc i gave her one, including a spiked collar, and her gray bandana. wristbands, a ...bandage? i liked to wear as if i had some sort of wound, gave her an ipod arm band (including headphones), a sticker (it mightve actually been meant to be a TATTOO?) with my favorite number (11), and on her right shoulder an LOL face sticker, earrings, a chained wristband along her leg wristbands cause i played LOZ twilight princess and i liked the chain on Wofl Links leg, AND............A CHAIN...HARNESS?? oh also changed her eyes to red. cause red eyes were badass.

i almost NEVER drew her harness tho. FUCK CHAINS...

i changed my fursona again tho, to a lil fennec fox named Zenka. i made Raven more of a High school persona kinda of character, and also for vent again. i updated her designs but kept a lot of stuff on her still, i was really attached to a buncha her stuff. got rid of the chains and wrist bands and the stickers. combined her collar and bandana, made a camo printed collar, gave her a KITTY HAT i loved these types of hats back then!!! i collected the hell out of them! i gave her a pink nose, green eyes, and black faded tip tail (i played okami recently ghfdk). oh and i actually learned a bit of anatomy, so she looks more like an actual shepherd dog.

(got a tablet recently. did i mention the ones before were drawn with a mouse? its all tablet drawings from here on out)

i drew these only a few years ago for funsies, but this is a side by side comparison

i started to FINALLY become attached to Raven, but i wasnt feeling her green eyes, and i was starting to love pink. minus the black tipped tail, which i forgot (or maybe i didnt cause this was when i got the albino idea), here is when i officially started the process to permanently changing her design to what it is today. i also noticed i had a nick on my left ear, so its been an official staple of all my fursonas designs ever since.

made her a new anthro form that i ended up NEVER drawing after i made this cause i had no idea how to design clothes. disclaimer, ive NEVER smoked but i thought it was Cool(tm) back then, so id draw my sonas smoking. at least smoking rainbows didnt sound or look so deadly. OH and teh declawed design idea comes from when i started working in the job industry and bc of it i have bouts of joint and muscle pain every now and then, possibly arthritis, who can a afford a doctor and official diagnoses these days. and the effect of declawing animals shares the same symptoms, so i use it as a little hidden tid bit.

fast forward a bit, new ref 2015

i finally came out being a lesbian and its just been good designs since then. LOOK AT HER LIL FLUFF HEAD

new ref in 2017, finally new official name!! took getting some used to. i had a childhood friend who was considered a bad influence/bad seed child, but i enjoyed her company, and loved the name she picked for herself Blank.

besides liking the name, its “””””””symbolic”””””””” as seen in the second pic, a ref sheet i tried making earlier this year

(also ditched the ink stained tail design idea, nvr used it. now its just a silver tipped tail)

and HERE WE ARE NOW!!!!

THE COMEBACK OF THE GRAY CAMO............ anyways thank for hearing me out!!! ilove this girl so much

[peachwaifu]

sʜᴀᴡɴ ᴍᴇɴᴅᴇs: ᴛʜᴇ ᴀʟʙᴜᴍ

i was tagged by @onlineluna to rank shawn mendes: the album from 1 - 10, with 1 being the most liked.

i tag: ?!?! everyone who wants 2 do this. thank u.

( why. ) this has to be my favourite song off the album since i’ve been non-stop singing it and humming it since i first heard it. it’s the song that was inspired by daniel caesar and he did such a great job. i didn’t know how shawn was gonna do with this type of song, but he executed it so well. also?? the lyrics are so lovely.

( lost in japan. ) !!! when i first heard this song?!?! i was so appalled ?!? i didnt expect that from him AT ALL. i was so mf pleasantly surprised by it. it reminds me of a calm summer night i cant wait 2 fall in luv w a girl whilst listening 2 this song.

( where were you in the morning. ) ig i just like his slower songs fjskdf i don’t really have much to say abt this one other than the fact that even tho he got his heart’s ass kicked bc of this song, i feel so serene and at peace when i listen to it. i added it 2 my rainy day playlist.

( particular taste. ) no offence but i love this song !?! i luv the concept of shawn being with someone a lil rowdy and just so independent. ik that the character he’s talking about in the song is exaggerated but like?? the thought of him with someone like the girl he’s talking about in this song makes me giddy (and it’s not just bc i relate !!!) ALSO his enunciation in the song ? gets dis puthy running.

( mutual. ) THE VIBE WITH THIS SONG !! it’s so ~*funky*~ and he also sounds so hot n desperate which is exactly how i like my men! it nvr fails to get me bumpin my head n tappin my feet.

( fallin’ all in you. ) it was higher on my list before but the more i thought about it, the more i realise that i’m just in love with the concept but not the execution. BUT that doesn’t mean that i dont luv the song in general. it’s such a cute song and i wanna serenade someone with it tbh. u can def tell that ed sheeran helped write the song. u can just hear it.

( queen. ) i personally feel so attacked whenever i hear this song and also when he first says ‘it’s hard to believe’, i immediately say ‘that i couldn’t see... that u were always there beside me...’ it’s a BOP and u can’t deny that. i feel like this is one of those songs that’s gonna be better live than in the studio tbh. if he performs this live, i just know that he’s gonna have a goOoOoOoOod time.

( like to be you ft. julia michaels. ) it took me a couple of days to warm up to this song bc when i first heard it, i was like ?!?!? what is this. but the more i listened to the song, the more i started to like it. and tbh julia michaels SHINES in this song. her emotion while she sings is somethin else my dudes.

( youth. ) i had to write a presentation outline about shawn mendes for my friend, and i mentioned how this song sounds like an anthem for a post-apocalyptic/dystopian young adult movie. i love everything the song stands for, but musically? khalid’s and shawn’s voices don’t mesh very well imo.

( perfectly wrong. ) idk why this song is so low on this list?!? i love this song a lot. it’s so raw and emotional, and u can hear it in his voice when he sings. but it’s one of the songs that i’ve listened to the least in this album, and i think it’s bc it gets me really Emo™ whenever i hear it.

( in my blood. ) i think the only reason why this got #11 is bc of the amount of times i hear it in my everyday life. i’ve worn it out already, but that doesn’t mean i don’t put it on whenever i’m feelin like shit and i need a pick me up.

( nervous. ) IT .... PROBABLY JUST NEEDS MORE TIME.... FOR ME TO WARM UP TO IT..... it’s only.. okay ..... in my opinion..... the video was nice tho.

( because i had you. ) it’s...... cute ig............ im still gonna sing along.... but i dont like the concept of him taking his new girl to all the places that he took his ex that he’s still in love with esp when he knows that he could never fall in love w the new girl bc he’s so hung up on his ex. like. that shit SUCKS. ESPECIALLY when his ex has a new mans now. leave her alone, u heathen!

( when you’re ready. ) idk if it’s bc like it doesn’t seem like it fits the album or like. it’s bc i also don’t like the concept of waiting for someone and being someone’s plan b or WHAT. but this song rubs me the wrong way. dont get me wrong.. ima still sing along but?? idk !! it’s just not a fav of mine.

omg this was so much longer than i anticipated im so sorry also i agree with luna that i don’t rly like his album cover that much. i love the flowers but his face comin off looks so weird to me JFKSJD  thank u for coming to my ted talk goodbye!

[kidddes]

ok,,,

so I’m here thinkin n like I went through a glo up. I lost weight and look overall better.

Which has garnered more attention frm ppl,,,N i don’t exactly know how to take it,,,so I kinda just been actin I don’t notice whn ppl are basically burning holes into me whn they look.

N ngl,,,its a bit uncomfortable.

It took me awhile to grow into my looks,,,but I always knew I was alright in my younger days.

Obvi,,, most ppls middle school phase is nvr good cuz kids are dicks. point blank period. n I’m not gonna lie,,,I was one of those dicks,,,kinda. But it was more like crack a joke, not realizing wht I said was completely detrimental to the other person kind of thing.

yeahh,,,we’ve grown out of it (kinda), but I wasnt a bully, just didn’t know whn to stfu :).

Sooo anyways

I was a chubby girl but I nvr really noticed until I look bck at pics n im just like,,,,somethings not right here. It felt like I blocked off a part of my brain frm anything before high school. But maybe I knew cuz I stopped taking pictures,,,like they’re aren’t any pictures of me in hs.

N for a very long time I didnt.

I’ve had stretch marks since I was in 8th grade n didnt feel comfortable wearing clothes tht showed my arms, or evn cared to get clothes tht could possibly mke me feel more comfortable. I don’t wnt to say I didn’t care, But I didn’t care.

Until I got to college.

Now this is where I start to realize, how sht really goes down whn it comes to how you look.

Now in hs, I didnt really talk to niggas. I mean me an my friends chatted it uppp about who we thought was cute and yada yada, but didnt really participate. I observed a lot and felt like I understood the mechanics of it all, which soundss like a weird way to put it, but it was like kinda like watching the same scenes play over in hs. The boy and girls play fight, argue, chase each other and hanging out in the hallway.

Thn boom,,, sneaky link on a tuesday morning.

But I was into playing ball and chilling with my friends, again had my little crushes,,,but me being a shermie, I didn’t know how to tlk.

Bck to college, I was a freshman and was new to everything, including making myself look nice and developing my own personal style,,,which I fcking had none,, but not my fault,,but I learned.

But my ego and pride had to get gutted before tht. I was high n usually whn I get high, I hve these like epiphanies. These real clear moments.

So I was with my friends at an event, I had put on clothes, not really knowing how to put an outfit together, n ngl, frm wht I remember it was a mess.

But I had the epiphany moment whn remembering a comment my roomate had made saying “wht are you wearing” n kinda laughing to herself.

And I felt bad, but here’s where the epiphany comes in. I took out my phone and began writing about how I need to step it up and stop looking so frumpy and put effort into my appearance.

I realized I felt kinda bad about wnting to look nice,,,but for wht?

Like really for wht?

N this moment was kinda a turning point in my character. I’m just happy tht it wasn’t for male validation cuz there was plenty of times niggas tht I absolutely dont care for would always hit me with the-

“You would look so much better if...”

Shut the fuck up bro, nobody cares.

Literally to me, it was like them just telling me tht so I can become more fuckable to them, it aint really hve sht to do with me.

N thts another reason why I didnt give a fuck cuz its not hard to fuck a man. Fuckin treeshes

Anyways,,,

I developed a style and picked up new hobbies n built myself bck up, brick by brick like tetris.

I actually felt good about myself and higkey fallin in love with the way I look,,,cuz I’m cute. n ppl notice and its kinda scary, cuz I’m actually not fond of ppl noticing me. I kinda want to blend into the bckground. But im always thankful whn ppl compliment me n stuff,,,evn though I nvr know how to take them,,,

n Im not saying its been all rainbows and peonies over here cuzzz I hit rock bottom in my self-worth a couple times, stuck in my head recycling the same sht over and over.

But thn I realize, these guilty feelings Im feeling over wht ppl have said to ME n did to ME,,,bitch these arent mine. I don’t have sht to feel guilty for, like you’re mad at me because I’m actually a complex person with multiple talents that I have curated over the years by myself, with my own will.

Mad at me cuz I made it out of situations tht most ppl wouldn’t even know where to start.

Mad at me cuz I’m bettering myself.

Thts hater sht.

n I cant believe I let myself succumbed to tht type of light pressure frm ppl.

I have grown so much n I dont give myself credit.

I might not be exactly where I wnt to be,,,but thts the process of growth. Slow and steady.

[justmeinstead]

Sun, 6 May

hey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!after so long for not updating my profile for tumblr theres alot to talk about tho. I just dk where to start with really heheh, well i just gonna go with the flow tho. Usually i update it thru my phone but i find it smh difficult cause need to type and it gets irritating at times, right now im at work and my office comp is able to access to tmblr so is much easier to type with the keyboard. Especially when you know you have content to talk about. Before we start where we left which idk whr, i would like to say tht is been 1year alrd for me and my ummi. See the girl in my DP pic shes been the best tht ever hppn in my life, nothing cn take her away from me plus we hve our princess tht will always hold us tight tgtr and both of us will do our best to guide her and raise her well. One more thing have fun reading ummi. ILOVEYOU IT HAS BEEN AND IT WILL ALWAYS BE.

Lets Begin;

So whr did i stop after so long??? hmmm guess what fgt about it is alrd 2018 a brand new year and is alrd May guys Ramadhan also around the corner...if we were to flashbck for 2018 hmm smh theres kinda alot tht had hppn alrd..lets lay it out shall we, i will list down the importants of it only ok? Lets go...

1) Savings plan for our marriage is a lil bit bumpy as we just used it up for our trip to bangkok. No doubt we hve alrd plan to pick up our savings. 

2) 1st year anniversary falls on 11/04/2018 and on the 21/03/2018 is also our 1st year of knowing each other. For this story of our anniversary i will try to keep it nice and short to read. It has been a bumpy ride for our r/s knowing is been alrd 1 year were tgtr so blessed and thanks to him above who plan our path to meet each other. Ofcrs the mainstream part of anniversary is the exchnge gift, im actually speechless when i recieve mine,you guys wont believe the creativeness in her to do wht she did is just beyond wow! heheh let me tell about wht she did, she did a flipbook with just papers and each pages has it owns unique style of animations is all DIY evry piece of details and attention she did is done perfectly. For hers i buy is all a last min item heheh wht i bought is a laptop bag and a notebook, knowing she loves to write and her diary she needs a new one plus is green her fav colour but guess wht shes smh now hooked with the colour blue which my fav colour ^^ is true laa how come shes not into blue evry time when we go out as family cnfrm whr blue most of the time heheh. Wtv it is alhamdulillah we manage to pull thru wtv tht we face tgtr the ups and down. Now all we need to do is to be strict in our savings and wait for the big day inshaallah amin.

3) Bangkok Trip

For this trip is a 4d3n trip for us we were so excited for it and at the same is sad. why sad? is bcs we cant bring along our princess along as distance away w/o her is sucks. Nvr the less we keep our heads up and proceed, so how the day when from day 1 till were bck in sg? Let me see if im able to cut evrtyg short and squeeze all the stories tgtr or nah..wish me luck heheh..[ 28/04/18 1st day; ummi hve to work from 7am -2pm, while i was still sleeping. So i fetch her from work and first thing we proceed to clementi mall and chnge some amount of money once we did tht we straight proceed to changi as our flight is at 1800hr. Fast fwd, we rch changi airport take our boarding pass and we go find food, keep searching we decide to eat McDonald. Continue story once landed ^^ We reach Bkk alrd heheh thts a very fast forward from mkn to land at Bkk, once rch we got to freaking walk 500m just to rch the arrival hall..rch the arrival, chop passport,all done we go and get our simcard as internet access is major must since we are on our own, get simcard done.Next we get into line for a cab and guess what once we get a cab it cost us about 500 Thai Baht whr my friend says you can get at about below 300 baht..well anw we manage to rch the hotel and settle btw we stay in Bangkok City Hotel.] [29/04/18 2nd day; Theres a lot for 2nd day as we were out from noon till night and most of it we do is shop and walk nothing much just exploring the city tgtr. Food wasnt so difficult for us as our hotel is near to a mosque and therefore theres Halal food, we had lunch in one of the shop near the mosque.. All we had was just one plain rice with 2 omelletes thts for ummi and i had rice with beef and basils, not only is cheap is freaking delicious and the serving were just right and is just a good meal to have. Well actually nothing much to say for this day..main thing is walk around and shopping thats all guys.][30/04/2018 3rd day; for this day also we didnt do much just go out shop and we when to the night market which open at 5pm onwards. End the night early get bck to our hotel pack our stuff get ready for heading bck on the next day.][01/05/2018 4th day; woke up, freshen up, get ready say one last goodbye to the hotel and chckout. We tot we cn get a cheaper price ride to the airport infact is the same price as we took when we first landed. well anw we still got money left so we just pay for it jelh.] 

So guys thats the update from eversince we last posted anytg and to my ummi happy reading to this post..Till more to come Inshaallah Amin!.ILOVEYOU UMMI IT HAS BEEN AND IT WILL ALWAYS BE, IMISSYOU SO MUCH UMMI. Blessed to have you and kakak thanks to him.

-Justmeinstead ^^

[lovbhobi-archive-blog]

good night to evry1 EXCEPT the person who decided to play hoseok dirty

[awesomeatitsbest]

*scroll past this if u dnt wanna read me having a mental breakdown over a show*

i’ve been putting off watching the finale all week cuz i feel like im bouta get wrecked but im about to watch it rn and im literally so nervous omg here we go iM STRESSED

yall Rara in a choker hell yuh but also screw lex luthor step tf off man

yall she hesitated when she saw that pic of eliza right? cuZ SHES GOOD AND DESERVES BETTER

omg eve chill tf out

man, u can nvr trust white men as presidents

wow this is so dramatic w My Way fcking playing like this wow iM STRESSED

lex in the lexosuit....*intense eye roll*

hey yall think lex has a “take over the world” playlist playing in the suit

yall if Rara dont get some good that she deserves im FIGHTING yall she dont deserve this ;—; i know she fcking hates america and all buT IS SHE WRONG

theres so much happening wow im guessing a lot of things are gonna be left hanging by the end of this episode huh

omg Kara did basically die yall

im sO HAPPY ALEX REMEMBERS NOW ;—;

wow someone throw Lex into the sun, he made Red Daughter cry but also someone teach her how to Google

dude can ben lockwood just disintegrate already.

omg my bby nia proTECT HER AT ALL COSTS

wait fcKING PAUSE because: Lena Luthor in a Blue Suit™️ (fuq me up)

oh lena always worried about kara 😢

im so stRESSED ALL THE LUTHORS IN A ROOM AAAAAAHHHHHHHH

brenda and katie are truly some stunning people

wow i rlly wanna see lena punch someone (lex)

he just fcking quoted Hitler

aaYYYEE LILLIAN STAY ON THE WINNING TEAM

george washington in the background of this shot is SENDING me

ALIEN RIOT WOOOO

how TF does jesse rath make wheezing onto glass hilarious

Nia done w his rebooted ass

hell yuh to that lena luthor death glare God bless you miss mcgrath

hAHAAAA YEAH KARA’S ARTICLE COMING IN CLUTCH SUCK AN EGG LEX

yall i forget that kara’s mother is literally alive along w Argo i wish they talked about it more somehow

at this point Ben Lockwood is the equivalent of a fcking pimple or whatever, a little annoying thing full of puss and i just wanna POP HIS LITTLE HEAD OFF

damn rebooted brainy rlly ticked nia off

papa j’onn omg pls dont die, sir ;—;

omg wAIT IM SHOOK YES LENA WOOOOOO GRAB THAT GUN AND PUNCH HER

and then lillian casually pepper spraying the goons ugh we love the luthor women

(we already know lillan gonna manipulate lena tho at some point tho right? amirite? or is it gonna be a complete 180 turn)

oh my gosh yes supergirl’s boot on ben lockwood is my aesthetic

kara when lex asks how she’s still alive: im a bAD BITCH you cAnt kILL ME but also grass

omg bITCH the other suit is built into her other suit thats some bad bitch moves right there

“you can thank your sister for this” hell yea lets all thank lena luthor #appreciatelenaluthor2k19

omg cmon brainy, fcking rereboot so u can emotionally support your badass girlfriend

omg im so glad he got rerebooted i thought this was gonna last til the nxt season

wow brainy is so supportive protect this nerd at all costs ;—; his ass said astazing and i love you

oh fck yea rock music fighting scene montage this appeals SPECIFICALLY to me

yES RARA FIGHT HIM FIIIIGHT HIIIIIIM

oh. T—T

oh wAIT SHES GETTING SUPERCHARGED AHAAAAH

holy shit this dude just exploded

oh nvm ofc this dude wont die

oh sHIT

oh SHIT

LENA JUST SHOT THE DUDE

Oh

oh damn

can i get uh uhmmm....onE THERAPIST FOR LENA LUTHOR AS SHE LIVES W THE TRAUMA OF KILLING HER OWN BROTHER

omg omg wait no no omg wait

wait omg pause

its happenening jsnt it

omg wait qait wait i caNt im not ready

im having PALPITATIONS

oh my FUCK

oh. my God.

we all saw this coming but. that was way worse than I could have ever imagined.

my HEART

i need a drink

pour one out for supercorp

it was nice while she lasted

peace THE FUCK out

hahaaah kara happy now but we all know its a fcking illusion

was anyone happy at this point cuz all i am rn is full of DREAD

Dolsen (is that the ship name) fcking RISE

ok waiT Brainia rise too ;—;

im still stressed but theyre all cute af

im STRESSED.

omg lena’s at game night.

im sinking in my seat i CANT watch

so kara and lena as game night partners is canon

too bad its been TAINTED

someone pls help lena my GOD

KARA COME FCKING CLEAN ALREADY UHG MAY AS FCKING WELL

“Not tonight.” or EVER APPARENTLY AT THIS POINT

all right george thats my boy

omg more of miss eve nxt season

wtf is LEVIATHAN IM ALREADY STRESSED

omg this dude gon be in the crossover

omg WHO TF DONT COME FOR PAPA J’ONN

oh no lena honey drinking her woes away someone get this woman a glass of one therapy session with a squeeze of the truth from kara

oh FUCK welp if that picture frame aint fcking foreshadowing the nxt season then idk what will

in conclusion: this finale stressed me tf out. goodbye. i’m sleeping for 30 years.

[britishb3atlemania]

last friday was my last day of work at my summer internship and i rlly didnt think it was gonna hit me hard at all like i thought i was ready to leave but when i was hugging the studio m8s goodbye my heart felt so heavy and like i was abt to cry and i was like wtfffffff

and they hugged me bye right outside my house so i ran inside and just cried bc wtH i miss them sm?!?!?!

im just mad too bc the dude who got me th job and was the reason i got treated like a queen i didnt get to hang out with too much all summer and i rlly wanted to and he planned this 48 hrs extravaganza for my final two days so that was finally the time i got to hang out with him a lot and he is so so sweet and nice and loving and adorable nerd0 and we have 3000 things in common and i was aching to b friends with him all summer and by that time it was too lil too late

i wanted to smakc him in the head he said “well i didnt invite u to things in the week nights bc i thought ud think i was square” and i was like fuk 0fff and he spoiled me rotten (all summer rlly) but esp those last two days and he kept hugging me sayin the teams gonna miss me and i was perf for the job and he even said he loves me and im like d0nT makeE meE crY im DRUNK be my friend forEVER i just rlly miss his lil precious bb face we hit it off so good we coulda had it all mi dude we coulda been bros but n0o0o0o0o0ooo

and i mean thats just one person i miss all of them like jfc!!!! and my one boss who legit sat down with me for half a week to teach me Cinema 4D from start to finish and always bought me mexican treats at the bakery and let me borrow his laptop so i could learn on my own and gave me a free copy of the software and ugh he has a special place in my heart too i lov him lots too

and my coworker who sat next to me and alwWAYS helped me when i asked or even didnt he would tell me so any tips to help with workflow and i work faster now and he was s00 patient like jfc the first 2 weeks all i did was ask him dumb af questions and he nvr seemed irritated by them at all ever g0d

and my other boss who always took me out to get drinks and always bought me the best stuff and found my jokes rlly funny and invited me out to things and g0d

and my other coworker who prolly h8s me lmfao esp after i texted him while drunk but still he was patient with me like hes the only one who didnt treat me like a queen which i needed lmfao and as one of two only poc in the workplace it was awesome having someone so cynical who v rarely cracked a white person joke that !I! didnt initiate like i fukin lived for those moments

and my beautiful fellow woc at the workplace damn she is so fukin patient with those bros she was the light at the end of the tunnel theyre all so talented but they would b nothin without her she is golden and sweet and i loved talking to her abt girl stuff and bitchin abt men ugghghhughg i miss her

i just rlly had such a rewarding summer and i dont feel liek i truly appreciated it until it was over im upsET!!!!!!

Also on my last day of work the office gifted me spotify premium bc they were sick and tired of hearing the commercial breaks when i got to b dj lmfao i love thos binches 

[oceansandroses]

Paris

So Im gonna write a basic travel thoughts page per place I went starting from Paris. I’d try to recall how lapland was too in hopefully future entries but so here goes!

Paris. 

The city of love and romance. 

But also sadly, the city of pee. 

No city smelt as bad as Paris did, each train, metro, bus and even at the Sacré-Cœur Basilique, with that amazing view, the smell of pee nvr left. Okay, I gotta try to start being more positive about things and stop looking at things from a negative point of view. But I really felt I had to get that point out. 

Great amazing things about Paris: the architecture stole my heart, it just enveloped my entire being. Everything, every place and every building or house was just so unique, tasteful and just a wonder to me. Each had their own flavor, taste and vibe. Whether was it a nice, quiet restaurant with people just sitting to people watch and chill with the oh-so-wonderful weather (it was a perpetual 18 degrees there, probably just 10 in the evenings) my down jacket was rather excessive but I guess it was alright, there were plenty of tourists in Paris that were cold even in that ‘warmth’-funny how Sweden changed me so much, to tolerate the cold. So the buildings were just so beautiful, I remember taking the train out of the airport and looking out of the window only to see many landed houses with different and varying numbers of windows. differently colored and different types of bricks or materials used in its assembly. I was sold. 

The weather as mentioned was great, warm and sunny, a nice warm but cooling breeze which Ale and I were really grateful for. Oh and Asian food!! On our first day there, besides having to skip going to the outlet stores because we didnt have much time to get from our airbnb to the outlets since we got pretty lost without internet (note to self to always get internet that works internationally) so we went to explore the city. Day 1 was lunch at 2/3+ before going off to see the Sacré-Cœur. The climb was alright but what made me weep tears of joy was my fav carousel right at the bottom of the basilique. The vibes of the place overall was really nice and pleasant. There were many people chilling, drinking a bottle of wine or beer or just chatting on the grass patch on the climb up the stairs to the church. Tourists were everywhere as with every tourist attraction but somehow the place didnt feel overrated. it wasnt swarmed with tourists and there was a unique and magical vibe to it. The street artists who were all around trying to earn their daily bread through caricature sketches, the nice restaurants that sold mussels and oysters in buckets at 14 euros (I was really so tempted). But there ale warned me about people who might pickpocket us, there were people who held different colored strings and she said they would hold the string out to us, the moment anyone touched it, they would ask you to pay them money or pickpocket us etc. It was kind scary but we hurried along. Oh, right at the top there was also a choo-choo train! it was pretty cool

Ale and I also bought 12 postcards at 2 euros yay! Next was the Arc de Triomphe, we managed to snap a few pictures but due to no reduced admission rates for us and to go up was 12 euros, I was pretty hesitant. Sharm did recommend us to go up but Ale said the weather was pretty cloudy and we prob could try tmr so we gave it a miss. From the Arc, we saw the Eiffel so both of us decided ourselves that it was quite near so we walked towards it. It was actually quite a walk but it felt kinda fun since we were ‘chasing the tower’ lol, always finding it amongst the buildings and its spotlight that shines throughout. The nightview of the Eiffel was really nice but there was not much magic vibes to it, maybe bcos it felt a lil overhyped. After which we got a little lost, took the wrong train from the wrong side and hopped on the dirtiest train i’ve ever been. The seats were fabric but they were so black and dirty. The red cushion seats were all blackish and they looked kinda mouldy. Much #grossness 

Anyways Ale always having a great directional sense brought us back to the right path after one wrong stop, and we met Sharm at Quatre Septembre to go hunt for some Ramen that people recommended her. It was a chinese-ran restaurant that sold jap food. The gyozas were good but the ramen pretty much tasted like yellow noodles in a chinese broth. The cha siew was good thou i must admit. After that we had Grom gelato (only bcos I said it was a good brand that Robz & I tried in Italy) before sharing a jar of 50cl of white wine. Ale taught me a bit of how to drink the wine while we sat under a heater in one of the most popular and happening streets of Paris. Oh another thing thou, Deliveroo exists in Paris and the delivery guys ride bicycles! So i guess it feels weird that with SG being a much smaller place, rarely do you see people in bikes as in bicycles but rather its just bikes and cars. #thatswhyCOEhighlor the green olives they served there was really nice thou, the black ones tasted like they were soaked in water or just oil. The olive oil in the black ones were barely visible.

it was a great chill hangout before we left and rested up for the night. We started our next day early with the Lourve tour which we paid 24 euros for but ended up feeling very disappointed and cheated since he just shared some short story about how this Lourve came about (from a small tower and a wall elsewhere) to this-he hates the pyramid design so obv not much talk was given about this pyramid before leaving us to walk to the entrance and enter it ourselves. #sobz #byemoney 

Inside the Lourve thou, it was a brand new story. We started off with the French sculptures and boy was it beautiful. Each sculpture felt like there was a life to it, its own story and feelings. Its lines were so beautiful, intricate and just so perfect in their own way. There were many students or people just chilling there and drawing life sketches of the sculptures. After that we kept getting lost but we saw the Napolean collection, the crazy Chandeliers around, the furniture before we attempted to see the French paintings. But bcos we kept getting lost, we ended up looking at the Egyptian collection. Much thanks to Ale for being alright to go to the Egyptian part of the museum with me. After the Lourve bcos there was free wifi, we decided to go hunt for bubble tea. We got lost and spent 1.5 hours around town before finding our Chatime! we had a crepe outside the Lourve too after getting lost half way and walking past it for like about the 3rd time. 

After Chatime, we went to primark to shop for a bit. The collection was rather big but okay ish like no feels to splurge on anything. We went to Bershka too before we rushed to the nearest post office to mail our postcards. The mail lady didnt speak a word of english and boy was she inefficient. She had to flip thru her stack of stamps thrice and recount sets of 5 stamps before letting us pay and all. 10 stamps were pretty pricey and costed me 15.8 euros but oh wells. crap I just realized I forgot to write daddy a happy birthday post card:( but wait its in April okay, ive got time. phew. 

It was a mad rush back home and we had to pass thru a black zone, there were so many blacks and police there, it felt like the entire atmosphere was really tense. The moment anybody made a mistake, the police were right there ready to arrest. We also saw some blacks making a living with a supermarket trolley as a bbq pit to cook kebab meats which I felt was pretty innovative and cool. I also love the buses here, uncles here stop when they see people running for the bus which doesnt really happen alot in SG. sigh. SG buses do come more frequently thou, but still that doesnt make up for bad behavior. 

After dropping our things, we took a train to the concert. Broods was the opening act before Tove Lo and i didnt do much research on her so I nvr knew Tove Lo was so sexualized. Every song she was shaking and grinding her hips to it and she eventually flashed her tits at the audience too. I bought an autographed CD from her but it was weird bcos while heading back Ale was sharing with me about how Tove Lo was being pretty illuminati and Satanic and that Beyonce was the head of the illuminati. I was very thankful for her religious sharig althoug I have to admit after hearing all that i was kinda scared. 

We ended the night cooking our only ‘meal’ of instant noodles before resting and heading to the airport by uber the next day. Thank god for uber for getting to our airbnb and to the airport. the public transport train ticket was far too ridiculous-10 euros for a single trip to the airport and we didnt even stay that far. Uber was just 11 euros per person-.-

Also pretty disappointed with the Paris duty free airport since the collection was so small, I couldnt get mommy’s and huijun’s clinique products. Ale and I each bought a crossaint there thou! It was really yummy

okay done for Paris its 1.45 in the morning here in LKP so im hungry and sleepy and tired and upset so i shld try to get some rest 

Ciao