#im so sorry if this shows up in the dr tags it wasn't on purpose

[hallucidump]

Trauma dump post yes I created this blog just to make this post yes I'm aware that that makes no sense. I am petty, and I have auditory hallucinations. Hilariously my hallucinations taunt me about my old Tumblr account where I talked about surviving SA and having a mental illness. Bc of the many similarities between DID and Schizoaffective-disorder I misdiagnosed and was diagnosed with the latter. They call me a liar and say that I posted this for attention and for people to feel sorry for me but we all no nobody really cares about mental health all this to say:

I am only posting this because they are working my nerves and I can't fight them, as they are not actually people. Instead I'm going to be petty and trauma dump, then come back to this post, which I know will have minimal if not zero interaction, and show them that, what I was saying about how unlikely it is for anyone to see those posts as my following was tiny and used no tags, is true.

Also they think they've shamed me into not talking about SA or mental health so im going to list a bunch of things they've tainted me about then go.

I was molested at 5-10 by a man named charles.

I was abused by my father.

My mother is also mentally ill and that effected my life growing up.

I was raped my an ex in highschool, he was my bf at the time. I did tell him to stop and he did not stop. He was fully aware that I didn't want him to do that.

I was raped again at 19. I confronted this guy about it afterwards, after he tricked me into showing up at his mothers shop, (used his mom's account) and he did admit to and apologize for it. It's still a heavy fuck you, he released nudes of me and pretended it wasn't him. I guess he can admit to raping me but putting me on the internet was the step too far? Maybe bc I didn't physically witness him doing it he thought he could lie.

My dr wrote "symptoms of ptsd" in my notes but I wasnt diagnosed with that. I did have severe flashbacks at some point but I was forced to work through them as my voices constantly triggered them purposely and accused me of trying to make them feel sorry for me as it happened.

Also, I am asexual and trying to see if I am also aromantic or if my aversion to dating is trauma induced.

I think that's it.

Petty of rational I guess.

[morphogenetic]

Opinion on Danganronpa's popularity? Also opinions on A3's main story (idk what to ask for this but I hope this works ^^)

dr popularity: still absolutely baffles me. second game i understand a LITTLE bc it almost has some really cool concepts and then either tosses them out the window bc it refuses to consistently think about its characters OR just doesn't think about them enough. that said, the fact that dr2 exists in the first place makes me so ????? because dr1 has the worst fucking mystery i've ever experienced in a video game. and like, yeah, i went into it knowing the mastermind and every spoiler under the sun, you could say 'of course it's going to be boring,' but the thing is if something is a good mystery story IT IS STILL ENGAGING EVEN IF YOU KNOW THE OUTCOME. fucking 999 is a GREAT mystery story even on your 3rd playthrough like. cmon. k0daka i know you hate detective stories but you could at least make your story MILDLY not insulting to your audience's intelligence

also it has the flattest characters ive seen in my fucking life (dr2 barely remedies this bc komaeda and hinata are actually kind of interesting and fuyuhiko has SOME level of growth but otherwise: lol) and the fact that people ever kin(ned) these literal cardboard cutouts makes me laugh

yes i know i rb dr sometimes. good art exists. that and the Potential komaeda and hinata and some of the dr2 characters have makes me feel like a Voltr0n Jam Store Customer (not explaining that reference just look up 'jam theory' and you'll find it if you don't know what the hell i'm talking about). it's genuinely kind of insulting to me how popular dr is when ITS NOT EVEN FUN TO PLAY MOST OF THE TIME

coughs. anyway

a3 main story: character growth my beloved. i'll be honest i don't Love act 1 but that's only bc it has to set everything up. i did almost cry at sakuya's va though.

act 2: 'oh my god tenma shut the fuck up i hate you' -> 'okay you're cool i guess' in the span of two hours. impressive

act 3: still in love with this. LOVE the portraits and how they make act 3 feel so different from the rest of 1-4. also gay rivalry my beloved

act 4: this is weird bc a lot of act 4 is setup for the 2nd and 3rd winter play character moments but also i love winter sooooo

act 5: TH. HI CHIKAGE

act 6: oh ym god i love kumon so much. so fucking much. and seing the way tenma and the rest of the troupe grew as a person is so. clenches fist. but kumon's arc is SO fucking strong it destroys me

act 7: gonna be honest, my least fave part of 5-8, i still like it (thinks about everyone except azami) but then i don't super love azami's arc so i'm just. idk i might need to read it again but it felt kinda underwhelming after 6. though i do still like it ofc

act 8: YYYEAAAAAAAAAAH (screaming while the opera house is on fire) THE PEAK OF FICTION

talking about the main story is hard bc a lot of the things i like are in events though l o l (looks at kniroun)