#im sorry i got called a good doggy once by a cute guy and now my whole brain short circuits good lord

[jonny-b-meowborn]

How am I supposed to focus on checking if my fic looks good knowing that the cute guy called me a good doggy in my dms

[nikrangdan]

enhypen x short!reader

pairing: enhypen x short!reader

genre: fluff, comedy

description: how enhypen would react to a short reader!!! this was requested btw i hope u guys like 😁 ive written separate headcanons for sunghoon and jay before but i wrote more here anyways 😏 THERES A COUPLE CUSS WORDS IN HERE

———————

HEESEUNG:

okay lets get this straight

hes literally the tallest member in enha

and then ur the shortest in ur friend group

POWER COUPLE ⁉️⁉️⁉️

im literally crying bc when u guys are standing facing each other heeseung is just looking straight over ur head LIKE UR NOT EVEN IN HIS LINE OF SIGHT

and THIS is why he always has his arm around ur shoulder or he makes sure ur holding onto his arm or smthn

HE WANTS U TO BE WITH HIM AT ALL TIMES BC SOMETIMES HE CANT SEE U☹️☹️☹️

and when hes practicing he likes to bring u up to dance with him

like he holds ur hands and u just try to 💃🏻🕺🏻💃🏻 with justin bieber playing in the background

“i cant dance heeseung u know this” u stare up at him

“i know just vibe to the music~”

he finds it hilarious so hes giggling the whole time u two do a little jiggy

AND THEN HE GETS ALL SOFT AND TURNS U AROUND TO BACKHUG U AND FACE THE MIRRORS and he watches u guys sway back and forth slowly to the music

he loves the height difference and hes always looking at it in mirrors

JAY:

*takes a deep breath* ... JAYYYYYY‼️‼️

he probably mentioned how short u are a couple times when you first met but i dont think he would be the type to constantly point out ur height and tease u or smthn

BUT!!!!! he loves it

alot of clothes you like are often too big for you and hes like

I Am Here To Rescue You From Distress, My Love

Ur so thankful for him!!!

he loves finding clothes for you

shirts arent a big problem its mostly the pants

AND HE LIKES BUYING U PLATFORM SHOES

he says “u look so good”

Jay ur superman 🔥

idk he just thinks ur so cute

he likes to stare at u like 🥰🥰☺️☺️

❤️_❤️

Jay has such big heart eyes for u AAAAAA

when u two are in the kitchen u arent able to reach the high cupboards

SO HE BOUGHT U A HELLO KITTY STOOL

one time he stood on it and was like “y/n look”

you literally almost broke your neck trying to see him because HE WAS SO HIGH IN THE AIR

so high u were like “u got enough oxygen up there⁉️⁉️”

and then he said “u look like an ant” and he started dying at his own joke

But he never pulled that stool stunt again bc u attacked him viciously🤗🤗🤗

JAKE:

Wait im crying already

everytime i write about jake i have to take a break

hes literally too much for my heart

Okay

HE GIGGLE.....

he GIGGLE!!!!!!!

HE GIGGLES AT EVERYTHING U DO

Hes so obsessed with u its not even funny

he probably loves u more than u love him AND HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE BC HES JAKE SIM

His favorite thing ever is when sit in between his legs and ur back against his chest yknow

when u guys watch movies he feeds u popcorn like that

IM GONNA SAY THIS FOR ALOT OF THEM BUT

Head Pats!!!!!

He pats ur head alot or ruffles ur hair alot

and hes just so gentle with u

Ur like his little baby >_<

HIS BIG JACKETS WAIT

Jakes big fluffy bulky jackets

he wants u to wear them

and he

he zips them up all the way and puts the hoodie over ur head

and he just dies of laughter

Ur standing there like 🧍🏻‍♂️

“its getting hot in here jake”

you tried to flick the hood off but the chunky sleeve mixed with ur short arm was not a good combination so you couldnt even raise your arm

That made jake lose it and he just fell to the floor in tears😭

but seeing him so happy made u 🥰☺️ kinda so its okay

SUNGHOON:

Hello hand holder

i say this whenever write for hoon

but this guy🤝🤝🤝

Get those hands ready yall

mmm okay

he probably calls u shorty whenever he teases u

Rude ass 🙄

ur like “😐” and hes like

“im sorry” *attacks u in a very messy and unmannered hug to the point where u fall back onto the couch and almost break ur leg*

i bet he holds stuff up in the air so u have to jump up and attempt to get it😭 so evil

but he doesnt like seeing u suffer for too long so he gives it to u after like 5 seconds 😁

he teases u alot but when ur out in public hes like Bodyguard Hoon

Hes not letting anything happen to u!!!!

once again HES HOLDING UR HAND AT ALL TIMES

one thing he says he doesnt like but we all know hes lying is when u like to jump on his back and force him to give u a piggyback ride

he just accepts it

one time u fell asleep on his back and he was like

“uh y/n”

silence

yeah he eventually plopped u on the couch which woke u up

SUNOO:

Sunoo thinks ur so adorable 💧_💧

like u two could just be sitting next to eachother watching something

and u have ur legs pulled up to ur chest and ur arms wrapped around them with ur chin on ur knees

you hear him giggling to himself

u look over like ......🤨 “what”

“nothing y/n *giggles again* ur just so cute”

ur like Staaaaawwp and u push his shoulder

and then he pushes u back

AND THEN U START FIGHTING

Play fighting ****

u guys laugh so much 😭😭

sunoo likes to talk about you alot

to everyone

literally everyone

to the boys: “omg y/n fell trying to reach the garlic LMAO”

to his mom: “y/n went up to this guy thinking it was me and pushed him it was so funny”

to his instagram: “how did y/n fit through my neighbors doggy door and why”

PLEASE when u two have arguments for fun

u go jump on the couch so u can be taller than him

and u just stare at eachother before bursting out into laughter

he loves to show u off aaaa “heres y/n” ☺️☺️☺️☺️

JUNGWON:

EXPECT TEASING AT LEAST ONCE A DAY

Please i think id cry if i was friends with jungwon (AND NI-KI)

he play too much 😫 he actually has no chill

“can u reach this y/n? or should i carry you *evil laugh*”

but besides from the teasing he adores u so much

and theres some things you arent able to do

But hes so happy to do it for you!!! he loves feeling like hes doing smthn for u

He always has this proud dad look on his face whenever u literally do ANYTHING

u could literally pick a twig off the ground and jungwon would go 😊 thats my y/n

he likes to massage ur legs when ur just chilling on ur bed or smthn

hes got one hand massaging ur legs and his other hand massaging his own legs

“i’ll make us grow taller y/n!”

“what??? you don’t need to be taller jungwon, i do!!” u snatch the hand hes using to massage his own leg and plant it right back on ur own legs

he starts laughing really hard and u think ur the president of comedy now 🔥🔥

he likes feeling tall when hes with u

but he also likes being babied 🙁🙁

Plz give him head kisses and cheek pinches

NI-KI:

This kid is literally a titan

and hes crazy

picks u up BRIDAL STYLE and starts running around the room like an animal

like WHAT ???????

he says its because you’re the only THING around and he needs the exercise

and this kid is a teaser too😫😫

“y/n can you hand me the cereal up there? oh wait you cant”

you turn around like What the hell did u just say...

yeah he got a smacking that day

NO BUT SOMETIMES HE BE TAKING THE JOKES TOO FAR AND RIGHT AFTER HE SAYS IT HES LIKE

“im just kidding i didnt mean it”

Anyways

ni-ki is also very sweet

he offers piggyback rides and makes u little gifts

one time u got a cramp from being on ur tippy toes too long

he was laughing at first but then he saw ur eyes welling up with tears and he ran to u really fast 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

ALSO WHEN U HOLD HANDS you both always stare bc THE SIZE DIFFERENCE PLLLZZZSSMMMNXX

heres an analogy

ni-ki hands : whale :: y/n hands : seahorse

LITERALLY U CANT EVEN SEE UR HANDS ANYMORE

they just vanish into thin air and u guys think its peak comedy

“whered ur hand go y/n 💀”

[apenapaperandadoofus]

Can you make a list on who you think is the most to least reliable of the RFA (+ Minor Trio if you want!) when it comes to pets 👀

gasp you know what yes (I've been wanting to make some lists for a while -maybe least to most bottom of each of the RFA characters LMAO-)

MysMe characters least to most reliable with a pet and what pet would they have:

11. Rika

LMFAO bet ya didn't expect that did ya!? Nah you probably did, anyway the reason why she's the least reliable for a pet it's kinda obvious, first of all, she would refuse to get her pet treatment when it almost turns blind and ma'am? Please help your dog???

Also if at any time the pet dies she would start another cult so let's not risk it with her. Instead of an animal maybe give her a rock instead pfttt (actually wait-no she'd probably throw it at our poor mint coloured hair boy just give her a dog plushy it smth she can't be trusted with alive things)

10. Saeyoung

You may be asking me, Amanda, why, Saeyoung absolutely loves cats he'd be a cool cat dad, and yes, you're right. But you also don't understand that this man's love for cats goes SO far that he will actually cause chaos all around him. He'd give the cat SO many treats, not only that, but he'd also cuddle them, and that's nice tight? Wrong. This man will try to stretch the cat, grab it and twirl it around, reenact the lion king and do the 'Simba' bit and everything. Not only that he'd completely use it to prank Zen and everyone else, overall, he'd be a great pet owner but it'd be too much chaos so let's just stick with loving cats from afar.

Also I feel like he'd get a snake for some reason, and he'd dress them up in like a fancy bowtie a hat, or an iguana or chameleon y'know? He'd go for the amphibian type :o

9. Ray

I love our boy, I really do, but honestly how do you expect him to take care of a dog if he can't take care of himself. 😢

Actually scratch that, if he had a dog he would definitely love it and spoil it, and we live for that but also:

honey focus on yourself too we don't want you to D I E

Maybe give him a hamster or smth, while he's hacking away and watching MC in their room the hamster will be spinning on it's wheel super happy

Or he can have some cute fishes 🐟🐠

And like his brother, because great minds think alike, maybe a chameleon. He'd be pretty scared of them at first but he found one under some flowers and decided to rescue it, and now he sort of ended up adopting it :D

Although I find it pretty unlikely that he'll get a pet, he's more into flowers anyway

(OH WAIT WHAT ABOUT BEES? YA LIKE JAZZ -im sorry pft but now I need to see Ray in like those bee farmer dress things lmao)

8. Zen

I could see him as the pet owner that takes their dogs on walks and such, but honestly, if he's allergic to cats he's probably allergic to other animals too, at least some with a lot of hair! Although I feel like he'd get one of those big dogs and he'd go on runs with it all the time. The dog would be like the ones that are mostly thought of as super dangerous or aggressive but it turns out they're a sweetheart. Either that or a poodle 🐩💀 (but like I said, he's probably allergic to animals with lots of hair.)

HOW ABOUT A PARROT? ZEN COULD TOTALLY PRACTICE HIS LINES AND SONGS WITH THE PARROT AJDNFBFB

7. Jihyun

Jihyun would be pretty good as a pet owner but honestly he'd be super nervous at everything at first. Welcome to the Jihyun apologizing to his pet show akdjdn. But would we trust him with a pet? He wasn't really able to take care of two teenage boys -although it was mostly because he was in a toxic relationship 💀

When he has his sight problems he could totally get those helper dogs? (Forgot what they're called I'm sorry T_T)

He'd probably get a more chill pet tho, maybe a cat (he probably likes them a lot too! Also they're pretty calming.) So he could have like the guide dog and a small kitty too!

6. Jaehee

She'd be an awesome pet mom lol. I don't think she'd get a cat after being traumatized from pet-sitting Elizabeth. Maybe she could get like a turtle 🐢

Or maybe a rat to reenact Ratatouille lmaoo

She wouldn't get big pets unless the MC wanted to adopt something (and if they're a couple, we all know what people who want kids but can't or just aren't able to adopt at the moment, do, they get DOGS AND CATS!!!)

So honestly she'd start understanding why Jumin pampers Elly so much, since your dogs basically your child now PFTTT

Maybe a bunny too? I could see her working with the bunny on her head lmao and that's adorable

Omg imagine her with a SNAKE, HOW BADASS WOULD THAT BE???

5. Suit Saeran

You may be wondering once again, WHAT AND WHY

Let me explain.

Suit would dffinetly get those scary and big dogs that have spiky collars and everything, and he'd probably call him something like Killer or Skull Destroyer, or maybe Blade lmao

And we all know he'd die for his dog. It's the only one he can trust ajdhdbdbd

He'd be like the bad boys that walk around with their dog everywhere growling at people (not just the dog, the two of them)

And "Spike" would be so well taken care of. Believers have to start doing draws to see who feeds the monster dog that always bites them PFTTT

The dog would also dffinetly know how to fight. It'd be cute if the only person he likes appart from Saeran tho is MC hehe

AND you cannot change my mind in this, ever since Saeran got "Dark Knight" (I'm experimenting with the dog names pfft) he's shown him a picture of Saeyoung and taught him to absolutely hate his guts, so Seven, buddy, maybe don't get to close to them lol

AND the backstory for this dog is that Saeran found him under some bushes, hurt, and the dog reminded him of when he was younger, so he took him in and that's how the doggie came to be :3

3. GE Saeran

Idk, he'd also get the normal-ish animals, like a bunny or a cat (he'd like how calming they are.)

He'd be awesome with animals too!

Also uhm, someone please draw him as a farmer AJDHDHD lmaoo that's the first thing that came to mind 😂

He'd be the person that likes animals but like....other people's animals? He'd love to see Elizabeth and such, but he wouldn't really want to have one (unless MC wanted to of course.) It's not that he doesn't like them, it's mostly because he feels more comfortable with other people's pets ajdjdbd

Also he doesn't want them to ruin the garden oop

3. In a tie with Saeran, Yoosung

I forgot about him and didn't want to change the numbers lmao

Yoosung is a vet, c'mon he knows how to deal with animals!

At first he'd be so freaking nervous and would be just like a helicopter parent, making sure the doggie is alright and such, but then he gets the hang of it and he's perfect.

We all know we got a bunny with him too in his GE :D so maybe a dog and a bunny! He'd have more than one pet I'll tell ya that.

2. Jumin

Listen he's the king alright? He pampers his cat SO much, and you can just TELL how much he loves Elly. We all stan a man that loves animals.

He'd probably get some exotic pets too, maybe a few horses and birds that are really exotic or something

But can you imagine him with like....a tiger PFT

He'd be like: omg this is a cat but bigger let me have one

It'd be like Sebastian from Black Butler lol

He'd also be up to a dog, it'd take a bit of convincing but if MC wants one then he'd snap his fingers and get them one immediately (I love this man he's so ADORABLE) and then they'd have two children and Zen wouldn't have to worry about just Elizabeth

1. Vanderwood

Yes! The one! The only!

He's the only one appart from Jaehee that has more than one braincell PFTTTTT

He'd have a pretty big and scary dog that would've an absolute sweetheart when you get to know them. Everyone at first is scared but the dog just wants to sleep and eat, that's all.

Vanderwood is super responsible, I mean after Saeyoung I'm sure a dog would be nothing. He'd also compare Seven to his dog lol "Not even Capitan America is that dirty!"

"you named your dog Capitan America...?"

"shut the hell up or I'm tasing you."

His dog would spend all day sleeping. Sometimes Vanderwood will take him on walks, and they really enjoy that time together.

Vanderwood romance route? Uh, no he's far too in love with his dog to be doing anything else PFT

And you cannot once again change my mind on this:

He talks to his dog when he's alone.

He will tell him about his day as he cooks or does the laundry. He'd be in an apron making some dinner and be all like:

"Ugh, today I had to take care of that no-good for nothing guy again. It's incredible how messy his house can get in just a matter of hours! Not only that, he wasn't eating properly again, that idiot. I had to practically drag him out of his chair and make him eat some food. Not that I'm worried. It'd just be a hassle to have to find another hacker as good as him. Seriously that guy...."

And the dog would be like excuse me do I look like your therapist please just give me food lolol

[ain-t-bovvered]

14x14 Commentary

Special episode where a bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)

Hello and welcome:

@purpleskiesandcherrypies  (Nat)

@dean-winchesters-bacon  (Kat)  good night babe

@waywardbaby  (Zee)

@ain-t-bovvered  (Giulia)

1 2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11  12  13

Giulia: Splash

14x14 Ouroboros

Zee: Can’t relive this. With Jack

Nat: I cry

Zee&Giu: I believe in us

Nat: Fuck this

Giulia: Ok sam

Zee: I do believe in us

Giulia: I ain’t got enough coffee in my blood

Zee: The end?? How dare he?

AAAND HERE WE ARE

[ Retro French pop music plays ] IS THIS A THING NOW?

Nat: Uhh...Mexico, Ellaaaa

Zee: Giuls, thoughts??

I see no wrongdoing here. The pasta is being dump into the water while it’s boiling. Garlic! YUM. That looks like too much sauce for that much pa- let’s be honest here, once can never be have too much sauce who cares. Ok I see olive oil, yellow bell pepper ( which is the best one ok) , garlic, onions, zucchini, and I think there’s parmigian cheese and *disgusted sound* cilantro, and a body....

Nat: Well, isn't that tasty

Giulia: ...I’M HUNGRY

Zee: Strike that

Nat: Fresh liver

Giulia: THE CILANTRO GUYS ! YUCK

[SIZZLES]

Nat: NO

Oh he’s making like fried liver, that was not cheese but grated bread ok ok I see you THAT LOOKS TASTY( you forgot the flour tho ok)

Nat: I'm more grossed out by the liver than the snake

Zee: Excuse me while I barf

Theeeey’re HEEEEEERE

Nat: Ohhh... babes

Zee: Shut. The. Fuck. Up

Giulia: those look tasty too

Creepy motherfucker , who is weirdly making me tingling with his cooking skill, : time to go Felix.

Giulia&Nat: A SNACK FOR LATER

Giulia: I WISH

Nat: NO How about no, He just left his meal cooking. Could burn the house down

Giulia: yeah real rude. Killing people and burning houses down

Nat: Mmmhh...snack

Giulia: Omg Jack’s plaid coat. Jack has amazing coats game y’all.

Nat: snacks

Zee: Three of them

oh...now they are all 4 of them ?

Nat: all of them,  well, no except one

Zee: Jack is a baby

Dean has a surprisingly soft steps. 

C: Oh no

I know Cass baby, that bitch fucked up a perfectly good pasta that’s what he did.

Giulia: Dean is us

D: Yeah who just let themselves be eaten?

Giulia: I’d let myself be eaten by you 

D: My money is on witchcraft.

R: Och, you, always blaming witches

D: Cause a lot of times is witches

Rowena basically : I was minding my glorious business when you whiny bitches called to beg for my help

D: Well we’ve been chasing this guy for weeks. What’s your point

Nat: Awww...Deano calm yo tits

Nat: Dean tossing things is my kink

Zee: Kinks again Nat?

Nat: Can you blame me? I'm FINE

Giulia: Hello castiel

R: Not enough Pantera posters for one.

Dean looking almost amused

Giulia: Coughing jack is my (1) fear

Jack: I’m fINe , I’M NoT dYinG . 

Nat: yeah, right, Jack

Nat: Dean..please!

R: Darling boy, everything means something.

Giulia: Be a dear and bring the snakeskin

Sam and Rowena research date night

R: You say [high pitched voice] ‘oh it’s just some magic and you think I’d leave it at that?’

Nat: Ahh..Sam puffing his chest

R: I’m more curious about how your brother is managing to keep an archangel locked away inside his mind.

S: Because....he’s Dean [read this as Batman]

Giulia&Zee: Dean is dean

Zee&Giulia: He’s fine

Nat: DEAN IS NOT FINE

Zee: Giuls. Shut up

Giulia: Zee 🖕🏻

DATE NIGHT!!

Look at them HAAAAANDS cradling the mug.

D: You know, I got to say, I got a pretty good feeling about bringing Rowena in on this one. I think her and Sam have a chance of cracking it.

me: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

C: They do have many books.

D: Yes, they do.

Zee: Worried husband

C: Hey Dean...

D: I’m fine....

ok ok ok ...I ADORE this shot! you’ll see this often in my feed , just fyi

C: What you're doing, even just sitting here and having a cup of coffee, is a Herculean feat. I can't imagine the willpower

Giulia: hey dean. Oh how I adore how he talks  

WHAT IS THAT LOOK DEAN

[Jack dying in the bathroom]

Giulia: JACK STOP FUCKING COUGHING

[Jack spitting blood] 

me : *stares in the distance, lost in my ptsd vietnam episode*

Zee: Are you really fine?

Nat: NO OF COURSE HE ISN'T

Cas is like.... DONT U LIE TO ME, i have no right to tell you this because of a recent stupid thing I did but DON’T LIE TO MY FACE

WHAT IS THIS LOOOOOOOOOOOOOK 

Zee: That’s what I’m supposed to say

D: ...That’s what we all say

Dean’s like.... yeah ok he can read right through me.

[ starting operation ‘ let’s lower our walls’ in 3....]

[....2......]

[......1...]

Giulia: Still even more convinced that they will use michael grace on jack

Giulia: Those eye lines are ruining me

D: There's this pounding in my head. It never stops. 

Castiel’s face:

D:  Michael's in there, and he is fighting hard to get out.

D: And I can't let my guard down... not for a second.

Me: I’ll cheer to that bro

C:  Well, that is not sustainable.

Giulia: THIS SHOW IS NOT SUSTAINABLE

D: ....It's on me.

Nat: IT'S NOT FUCKING ON YOU 

C: We are here to help you.

me: *SOBS*

D: I know that, and I appreciate that. I do.

[JACK STILL DYING IN THE BATHROOM]

Nat: fuck this

Zee: That kid is gonna die in the fucking bathroom

Giulia: U FUCKER STOP

Nat: IF... IF.... IF

D: If you don’t ....

THIS LOOKS ARE KILLING ME

D: We still have plan B

Nat: Fuck plan B

Giulia: NO ONE LIKES PLAN B

Zee: Coffin Ocean Done

Nat: NOT even plan B likes Plan B

Jack’s like : yo you finished with the eye fucking and feelings sharing so I don’t feel embarrassed by you two in public? 

Castiel’s like : I’m out with two problematic kids who don’t tell me nothing

Nat: EVERYBODY'S FINE

Dean:

Giulia: We are fiNe

C: Okay, um...these killings -- it seems like there's a ritualistic quality to the crime scenes, right? It's almost liturgical.

Zee: Greek there for ya

Giulia: thank you Mr.Portokalos 

D: Ah yeah. See that one I knew.

Dean...you cute fucker I swear

J: Anyone who could do this is a monster...I mean, even if they're human.

D: Looks like Sam and Rowena have something

Nat: Sam and Rowena have something wink wink

THEY DOOOOO ? (͠≖ ͜ʖ͠≖)

D: This is like an A.V. Club presentation.

Giulia: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH

J: What's an A.V. Club?

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH

C: It's a special group for people who do not play sports.

Giulia: I love the av club, where do I sign in?

Dean points at Cas “He’s the av club” [insert Oprah gif]

Giulia: IM DEAD

also how does Cas knows that? was that included in Metatron’s pop culture packet?

Nat: Of course he'll know

Zee: Jack is precious

R: Excuse me, boys, but this is a bit more pressing than your hilarious banter.

Excuse me Rowena , nothing is more pressing than their hilarious banter

CAS WHAT ARE U DOING , CONTROL YOUR EYEBROW

Giulia: clash of the titans. (Not gonna lie, I almost wrote clash of the tits). Just fyi

Zee&Nat: Of course you did

R: You know about Medusa?.

I’m sorry but....everyone knows about Medusa.  Ok ok this was mainly for the giggles and all because, you bet your ass that Dean would know who the fuck Medusa was, STOP MAKING DEAN THIS DUMB WHEN IT’S NOT REALISTIC.

Giulia: How caffeine is working

Nat: Because why else should the writers write this episode

Nat: Definitely...anything you want. Get on your knee. lol

Giulia: ...ooooh i can smell all the meta from here

Nat: They all gay for dick

Well Nat I guess….I mean... ...well that’s...that’s the goal

Giulia: U would all be gay for them

Nat: you not wrong

Giulia: MMMMMM

Nat: UHHHH FBI FBI

Zee: Fucking hell

Giulia: FBI FBI FBI

Nat&Giula: IS THIS AMUSING TO YOU?

Now turned on and scared Guy : No SIR

Cas: 

yeah that’s right call me Sir

Nat: Psycho penpal

Y’all my psycho text pals tho

Nat: you're not his type

Giulia: BITCH IM EVERYBODY’s TYPE

R:For the record, I don't love being included on his little hit list.

S: Apparently he can’t see angels

J: I’m not an angel

D: Close enough

C: So, if Jack and I approach Noah on our own, we -- we may surprise him.

Giulia: ABORT I DON T LIKE THAT PLAN

Zee: Happily surprised moose

Giulia: i’d get sloppy....( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Zee: I’m here for Sam’s short shirt

I’m here for them short of clothes 

R: I HAVE A PLAN

Giulia: WEE DOGGIE

Nat: OMG

Giulia: IS THAT JACK

Nat: THAT DOG IS SO SMALL IN SAM'S ARM

S: We -- We think he might have eaten something.

R: "We think"? "We think"? He means that it's my fault for not keeping an eye on the poor dear. He thinks that everything is my fault.

S: Can we not fight in front of the vet?

S: I mean, I guess it's not entirely your fault that you looked away!

R: He blames me for everything! I let his mother ride the Jet Ski one time!

WHAT IS THIS? AM I DEAD AND IN FANFIC TROPES PARADISE?

Nat: Wee Jackie Boy

Giulia: I CAN T

Zee: Sam got a dog and it’s his “son”

S: What are you doing?

R: Oh, I mean, I realize it's not...[Deep voice ]...pretending to be the FBI. [Normal voice] But there are other ways of doing things, Samuel. Plus...I thought my performance was quite magnificent.

Giulia: I NEED THOSE TWO TO FUCK 

Zee: The thermometer

Giulia: i bet he liked being a dog 

Giulia: *seeing just now Zee’s thermometer text*  THIS IS HORRIBLE TIMING

Nat: Did Jack just get something in his ass for this

Nat: YES

Zee: SO YES

J: Just wish I could've got it before she took my temperature.

Giulia: ...he took one for the team.

R: Oh, uh, a moment, Samuel. What did you do to that boy?

R: It's volatile magic, powerful, and it's stitched to him like some kind of parasite.I was curious before, but now I am worried, so I'll ask you again, Sam What did you do?

I can’t believe Rowena is lecturing Sam, and being right too

R: using dangerous, mysterious magic, regardless of the cost, that's a very on-brand me thing to do.

Nat: She's still so much shorter than him standing on the curb

Zee: Everyone is shorter than him

R: Of course, Samuel. Until very recently, I was the villain.

So I ordered this SamWitch extra spicy I guess.

Giulia: I REALLY NEED THOSE TWO TO GET IT OUT OF THEIR SYSTEM

Meanwhile scarred Jack :

Nat: That guy is creepy

Giulia: He’s so flamboyant loves every minute of it

Zee: That gorgon is a total bitch

Noah: "Helpless men" -- that's rich. No, I do eat ladies, too, but women have become so cautious lately. Must be all that finally waking up from centuries of misogynistic oppression. Good for them. Bad for you.

Nat: Ok but I like that

D: But if we cut off their head, then is more creatures gonna crawl out?

Ok but ...hey...legit question

....sam...

SAM

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?

knock first , kick doors later

Zee: Enter the angel of the lord

Noah a bit turned on and scared

Nat: does he do anything else

Nat: NO fair

Noah : demi-god actually

Zee: I’m a lover not a fighter

Nat: THEN LOVE HIM

Giulia: I DON'T LIKE THIS STORY

Nat: Slapping

Zee: Oh he didn’t

Nat: NO cas

#mood  #same

Nat: wHAT

Giulia: NO , WHAT

Zee: Real pleasure

Giulia: OH SAMMY IS HANGRY

Zee: Why is he kicking their asses?

Giulia: Stop making him bump his head

Nat: MICHAEL CAN GET OUT

Zee: Fuck yeah

Giulia: YAS JACK BABY

Zee: My baby is hurt

Giulia: ALL MY BABIES ARE HURT

Zee: Swallow Cas

Zee dON’T BE NASTY

Giulia: OH CAS KNOWS

Nat: I can't even see

this is painful 

Zee: Look how precious jack is

Nat: Dean's still too tall for the bed

Giulia: IM ANXIOUS . CAS IS ANGRY

Nat: POOR JACK THO?

Sam asking Rowena what to do is making me weak.

JESUS

Giulia: GOD DAMN IT. I CHOKED . that was scary

Nat: that's what she said

Nat: Cas wants to make up for it

Giulia: THERE ARE TOO MANY THINGS HAPPENING

[VIDEO] because I’m a sucker for these moments and you need to appreciate them more.

Giulia: We do too Jack

Zee: Special humans

Nat: sometimes we forget that too

Zee: Humans burn bright

Giulia: They are still human

Giulia: For a very brief time

Zee: He have to carry on

Nat: WE WILL NOT CARRY ON

Giulia: DAMN CAS

Nat: wHAT'S THE POINT

Nat: Jack has it right

Giulia: JACK IS RIGHT

Zee: It will hurt

Nat: Stop talking like that CAs

This scene is one of the best one , I can’t 

Nat: CASSSSSSSSS

Zee: Can Cas shut up already?

Giulia: IM CRYING

Giulia: MY GOD CAS

Nat: Jack calm yo tits

Giulia: JACK STOP SPIRALLING

Giulia: He s keeping the snake . LUCIFER SON IS KEEPING THE SNAKE. I DON T LIKE IT

OH....SOMEONE IS AWAKE

Nat: NO . WHAT STOP

Giulia: what is th

Zee: He woke up alright

 I KNOW WHERE I AM

Giulia: The screaming

Zee: He out

Nat: He's gone?

Giulia: OH NO. I DON T TRUST IT

Nat: NO

Giulia: DEAN DON’T PANIC

Giulia: OH SHIT

Nat: WHAT IS GOING ON

Giulia: OH FUCK

Nat: WELP MAGGIE IS GONE

Giulia: FUCK

Nat: WHAT THE FUCK

Giulia: DEAN BREATHE

Zee: Shut the fuck up

Nat: SHIT

Giulia: OH SHIT

Nat: DO YOU STILL WANT THEM TO BONE?

Nat: Michael!Rowena x Sam

Giulia: NOT NOW NAT!

Nat: SHUT UP NAT

Giulia: SHUT UP NAT .i can t watch this

Nat: Always taunting him. "come on sam, you can go harder than that, boy" .OH GOD SHUT UP NAT

Nat: FUCK YOU MICHAEL I HATE HIM SO MUCH

Zee: I fucking love him

M: It didn’t work out. It was him, not me.

Michael making promises.....DOESN’T WORK.

R: I’ll live either way

Zee: Sam is gonna off me

R: ..which makes dinner a little awkard

Giulia: GUYS I CAN T WATCH THIS

Nat: Fuck this

Nat: I'M HURT

Giulia: IM HURTING

Nat: how can americans watch it with commercial breaks?

M: Burning off your soul? You'll run out soon enough.

Giulia: i have no idea what to do

Giulia: How dare u

M: I am the commander of the host!   I am the cleanser of worlds!  I will not be challenged by a child!

You are a drama queen , that’s what you are

Nat: Of course

J: I'm not a child! I'm the son of Lucifer. I'm a Hunter. I am a Winchester!

Giulia: JACK

Zee&Nat: I am a Winchester

Nat: OH did he just swallowed Michael's grace

nat doN’T BE NASTY

Giulia: JACK IS GOING IN THAT BOX JACK IS SO GOING IN THAT BOX

J: Michael is dead

I don’t trust it

Nat: OH WINGS

Nat: I'm confused

Giulia: I DON T LIKE THIS

[after credits comments]

Giulia: PROMO. NOW

Giulia: AHAHAHA

Zee: What??!!

Giulia: NEXT EP IS GONNA BE FUN

Nat: I'm confused

Nat: Someone hold me

Zee: There there pats your back

Giulia: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT EP. IT JUST HURT ALL THE TIME .i’m sweating

Nat: I have no idea and I didn't like it

Zee: Hello. Are you new to SPN ?

Nat: What Michael is dead? Are we supposed to believe that?

Zee: No

Giulia: Jack worries me tho. And ya know the last ep of the season is called “Jack in the box”

Zee: Don’t go there

Giulia: How I cannot

Zee: Don’t know. Just don’t

Giulia: FUCK EVERYTHING THAT WAS A ROLLERCOASTER AND IM STILL ON IT

Zee: You’ll never get off

Giulia: That what he said

Zee: Stop it

Giulia: Fuck u all

And fuck spn

And dean

And sam

And cas

And fucking jack

I can t

*throw tables out the window*

.

.

.

If you want to get tagged in the future ones send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

TAGS: @wayward-angelgirl @destiel-honeypie     @mariekoukie6661     @dragontamerm      @closetspngirl   @rainflowermoon    @mattiecat      @bunnybaby121115  @aliaitee2   @jacks-word-of-the-day    @4evamc      @dammitsammy    @legendary-destiel  @winchesterprincessbride   @destielhoneybee   @castiellover20  @jacks-word-of-the-day @ravenhg @evvvissticante 

[blackmilkbangtan]

bts reactions to you being insecure about your thighs

yoongi:

you know what they say; the freaks come out at night. and for yoongi, that was his status quo. his lips brushed against yours, leaving your face to grow hot at how sensual he was being. he then trailed down your neck, nipping and licking your chest and collarbones. his mouth left a path from your belly button, down to your entrance. his hot breath against it made your thighs want to close together, but was restrained by his veiny hands. right before he dived in -;)- he stopped and looked at your uncomfortable expression.

“mama what’s wrong.” he stopped his actions and rested his head on your plush stomach.

“i don’t know, it’s just sometimes i feel like im gonna suffocate you.” you muttered.

yoongi looked at you and laughed, “do you really think these,” he grabbed your thighs tightly “can suffocate me? im a grown man i can handle it” he said proudly. those few words boosted your confidence and tickled you at the same time.

“thanks baby, i lowkey needed that.” you giggled.

“now come on so i can eat.”

jin:

jin was preparing himself for another episode of eat! jin hosted on vlive. he sat down at his computer closing down his tabs so his internet would run faster, but one surprised him.

‘weight loss tips’

he immediately put two and two tighter and realized it was probably you, since you were the last one at his desk. it made him a little upset that you wanted to loose weight, maybe he wasnt loving you enough. he began his hunt and searched around the relatively small apartment you two shared. he ended finding you following along to a “how to properly squat” tutorial.

“what’s this?” jin asked, surprising you during your workout.

“im just working out, is that a problem?”

“it’s not like you’d notice anyway.” you said under your breath.

“now what’s that supposed to mean?” he was getting agitated now.

“you never want to have sex anymore,” his features softened at what you said, “do you honestly think that we’re not doing it because of your weight?”

“i mean everytime we go out, you always look at these skinny ass girls”

“they don’t have anything to look at! im just happy that ive got someone that can sit on my lap without a bone ramming into my thigh!” he exclaimed.

you broke out crying, not because of what he said, just that you hate when someone yells at you. jin moved closer and wrapped you into a tight hug.

“look babe, i love you so much, you don’t even understand.” he hunched over so he could put his head in the crook of your neck.

“i love you too jin” he separated his body from yours and gazed into your eyes.

“c’mon into this room so i can show you how much i love you.”

namjoon:

you were laying in the bed with namjoon, spending his day off as it should be; a day off.

while you were scrolling through social media laughing at memes until you scrolled along a stupid post ranting about how namjoon doesn’t “deserve to be with a fat bitch like you.” you always know armys were overly possessive, but to comment on something that doesn’t concern you is disgusting.

the bad bitch inside of you wanted to clap back, but the sad bitch in you took over and you started to cry.

“babygirl what’s wrong, you was just chillin and now you crying. what happened?” he cooed, rubbing his large hands lovingly on your thighs.

“some stupid -probably no jam army, called me fat and said i don’t deserve you, nothing to bad” you chuckled with tears still forming in your eyes.

“your not fat, there’s just more to love.” he tried to reassure you.

“you know how many fan fictions ive read that said that exact same thing”

“but i mean it, you have nothing to be upset about. why do you think my favorite position is doggy style? i love seeing your ass jiggle when im-“ you cut his inappropriate sentence off with a quick playful punch on the shoulder.

“now get off that phone, i got something else you can play with.”

taehyung:

while walking home you were being harassed by two grown men commenting about your weight.

“where’s a fat bitch like you going?”

“yeah, you fucking whale” his friend went along with him. you decided to be the bigger person and ignore them, yet they still followed you home.

“can you guys just leave me alone” you shouted at them.

“yeah” a deep voice cut in. you looked up to see a handsome man to be your defender.

“what’s some good looking guy like you hanging out with...this?”

“look, while im smashing this thick beautiful girl, you can go back to dicking down bitches that when they throw it back it sound like a screenshot.” he clapped back. while they stared at him like he was nuts, your cheeks grew hot as the attractive stranger talked about you so openly, like you knew him.

“youre dismissed,” his scrawny ass jumped at him. the guys left with a muttering of “fucker” and “fat ass” -referring to you. he then wrapped his arms around your waist.

“thanks for the help, nobody usually stands up for me like that.”

“nobody as fine and cute as you should be getting pick on by some bummy dudes.” this guy was smooth a hell, made you want to suck his dick right on the spot.

“i was finally feeling confident about my thighs, i guess i got to go back to being insecure and hiding them.” you half joked, using it as a coping mechanism.

“i like them, better to grab when im-“ he stopped himself, realizing that he was going too far to be talking to a stranger.

“im taehyung” he stopped to shake your hand.

“(your name).”

“here take my number, call me when you get home” he quickly put his number in and headed off, waving while walking in the opposite direction. your heart fluttered as he left, you took a look at what he saved his number as. “that cute asian boy”, a small smile grew on your face as you shoved the phone back in your pocket and headed home.

jungkook:

you and jungkook haven’t been dating for a while, but that didn’t mean your feelings for each other weren’t true. jungkook had officially introduced you to his group members. and he decided to get you acquainted with them by jin cooking a meal for all of you. as for your outfit, the shorts you wore exposed the bottom part of your ass. it wasn’t like you were self-conscious about your body, except your thighs which were ridden with cellulite.

while at dinner, you helped jin pass out the plates. each time you leaned over they all stared longingly at your thighs, fixated which each step you took. your face grew hot, you began to lose confidence each time a pair of their pupils landed on you. you quickly dashed your way to the nearest bathroom.

“(your name), wait up-“

you sat on the toilet, with your face in your hands silently crying. even though it was such a little inconvenience, it made your anxiety skyrocket. while in the midst of thinking, two small knocks echoed throughout the small room and jungkook came in.

“babe, what happened out there?” jungkook knelt down to your eye level.

“they were looking at me,”

“that’s all? why-“

“no, they were looking at me like i was disgusting, like i’m too big-“

“look, baby, they’ve literally never seen a thick girl in korea never in their lives, shit i was even surprised to see you.” your heart rested a little easier as his hand settled on your lap.

“take it as a compliment, your beautiful no matter what size you are. on some sappy cliche shit; i love you no matter what.” once the two of you exited the bathroom, the chatter in the dining room stopped.

“can you guys stop staring? this is mine”

jimin:

you and jimin were walking around the mall, window shopping and such. you finally landed your eyes on a cute pair of floral shorts.

“hey jimin honey, can i get a pair of those?” you gazed at how beautiful the shorts were from outside the window.

“of course, come on let’s head in.” he lead your already intertwined hands into the shop. one of the workers came up to you guys with a face full of fake politeness.

“how can i help you today?” she questioned, you could’ve sworn you saw her roll her eyes at me.

“i would like those pair of shorts in the window there, in an xl please.” you decided to go a size up since an american medium is probably small in korea.

“im sorry but i don’t think we carry that for...your kind of size,” she disrespectfully said, eyeing you up and down.

“first of all-“ you were so angry that you were almost on the verge of tears.

“(your name) come on let’s go to a different store” jimin ushered you out the store. “so you just gon let that weenie hut jr lookin’ ass bitch talk about me like that? to my face?” you said with a hushed shout.

“i didn’t want to cause a sce-“

“cause a scene my ass, you know how i feel about myself. she just basically called me fat you know.” jimin stopped in his tracks, and held both of his hands on either side of your shoulder.

“there’s nothing wrong with your body at all,” he said sternly.

“listen, you being chubby doesn’t change the way i feel about you,” he then pulled you into a tight hug.

“now come on, that store was weak anyway, let’s go buy you some gucci.”

hoseok:

“muffin whats taking you so long in there?” hoseok shouted from the other side of the door. hoseok wanted to take you to the beach for his day off, and you wanted to cover up as much as your thighs and the cellulite that ruled over it as well.

you went over at least 17 outfits, and it’s taking you hours to decide on one.

“stop playing around, they’re gonna close the beach in like 2 and a half hours” another bang on the door followed as he finished his sentence.

“ok i’m done” the door swung open and you walked out in a pair of sweat pants and a throw on shirt.

“you’re not going outside like that”

“why?”

“why? you’re gonna have a fucking heat stroke wearing that, go but on your swim suit and some shorts.” he pushed you back into the room and he followed suit.

“people are gonna stare,” you looked down, being to shy to admit that your super insecure about your thighs. hoseok pulled you on the bed with him,

“you have nothing to worry about,”

“yes i-“

“no, you don’t.”

“but what about th-“

“those ‘all skin and bone’ girls at the beach that look at you?” his hand rested on your thigh and ran his thumb against the sides of them. “listen, theyre just mad that their boyfriends don’t feed them at home.” he joked. he always found a way to turn everything into something funny and you loved it.

“now out on the swimsuit that makes your ass look juicy.”

“the red one?”

“the red one.”

a.n.= unedited and i feel like hoseoks and jimins are a lil’ shitty. sorry @anon 🐝

[kihuis]

GOT7 Reaction: You refuse intimacy because you’re jealous

Anonymous said: Can you pretty please do a Got7 reaction to you refusing to be intimate with them because you're jealous? Thank you:)

slightly suggestive content (not exactly smut but yeah); a bit angsty??

Im Jaebum

You’d been needy all day, just wanting attention from your boyfriend. But every time you touched him he would just send you a look that said he was too busy right now. You were alone in the studio with him, it wouldn’t be hard for him to take a break long enough to satisfy your needs.

Jealous and pouty, you huffed out a breath before leaving the room, making your way back to his room, needing to occupy yourself. After sitting on his bed and playing on your phone for about another hour, Jaebum made his appearance at the door, smiling at the sight of you.

“Hey, sorry. I needed to get that done,” he said, pulling his shirt from his torso with a smirk. “If I remember, you needed something?”

You rolled your eyes before turning away from him as he climbed onto the bed to lay next to you. “No,” you said in a whiny voice.

This only made Jaebum chuckle before he started tickling your sides. “Why the pout, baby?”

You managed a straight face as you pushed him off of you. “You made me wait, so I’m making you wait,” you told him, sticking your tongue out. He scoffed in return. Two can play at that game.

Mark Tuan

You were listening to kiss the radio where GOT7 were the guests of the show while you made yourself breakfast. They were talking about touring overseas soon and the DJ asked Mark if he was excited to visit home for a while.

“Yes, I’m always excited to visit home. Sometimes it’s hard being so far away, but this is my home away from home, so I’m still happy,” Mark answered.

“Do you ever get excited to see some American women?” the radio host asked with a cheeky smile. 

When you heard this, your stomach turned a bit, not really anticipating Mark to answer. The thought of him being away for so long and surrounded by loads of American women made you jealous.

“No, no,” he replied with a laugh, brushing off the question. “That’s not usually on my mind when I visit home.”

About an hour later, he returned to the house, instantly coming up to you on the sofa. You could tell right away he was needy, but the host’s question was eating at the back of you  mind, so when Mark stuffed his face into the crook of your neck, you pushed him away. He just looked at you with a confused expression, but when you refused him a second time he sighed and asked what was wrong.

After explaining it to him, he shook his head, slightly annoyed. “Y/N, you’re the only one I think about when I’m away, you know that right?” 

You both spent the next few hours just sulking but you made up just fine.

Jackson Wang

You weren’t a stranger to Jackson’s flirtatious personality. He’s always been incredibly outgoing and sometimes that can be taken the wrong way.

So when you and him were at a party together, he had no problem conversing with everyone in the room. It shouldn’t have made you jealous, this is just how your boyfriend is, but you couldn’t refuse the pang of jealous that erupted in your stomach at the sight of Jackson laughing and talking with all his female friends.

You managed to pretty much ignore it the whole night, up until you both headed home. Not even thinking about it, you sat in the front seat next to the driver so Jackson had to sit in the back. He gave you a confused look, but ignored it.

Once home, you both walked inside and he was immediately on you, pushing you up against the door once it was closed. 

“You okay?” he asked quietly, running his hands down your sides. You sighed and pushed him away.

“I’m not in the mood tonight,” you said, crossing your arms. He pouted at you, wondering what he could have done to upset you. When you told him why you were upset, he’d feel so bad and would do anything you wanted to make you feel better. Although he’d be a little disappointed it didn’t involve anything underneath the sheets.

Park Jinyoung

You were always excited to see Jinyoung get new acting roles. He was talented and the world deserved to see that. You were always willing to read lines with him, too.

You both sat in his bedroom, going over the script. Every time he nailed a line, you’d smile, admiring his emotion. The scene was between his character and a girl. They’re conversation was heated, but at the same time weirdly intimate.

You quickly glazed over the stage direction and saw that the argument ended in a kiss, and instantly your heart sank. The thought Jinyoung kissing another girl made you upset, even though it shouldn’t have. It was only acting, right?

Once you finished the dialogue, Jinyoung leaned in to kiss you as the script said, a smirk settling on his lips. You turned your head last second, making his mouth land on your cheek instead.

“Y/N?” he asked, wondering why you suddenly aloof.

“You have to kiss her?” you responded with a pout. 

“Seriously?” Jinyoung narrowed his eyes at you. “It’s acting.” He honestly thought it was childish of you to be jealous of that, but he felt bad enough seeing your features sink the way they did.

“I know it’s just weird,” you admitted, closing the script. 

He sighed and looked at you. “You get a lot more than just my kisses, always remember that,” he said with a wink.

Choi Youngjae

You’d had a long day. As soon as you returned home from work/school, which had been majorly stressful, all you wanted was to get it all out of you, you needed to vent to someone, and Youngjae was usually very understand and willing to listen. Unfortunately when you returned home, he wasn’t alone like he normally was. Mark was sitting on your usual spot on the couch next to Youngjae as they conversed.

Refraining from rolling your eyes, you slug your bag from your shoulder, catching the boys’ attention. “Hey, babe! How was your day?” Youngjae asked.

“Fine,” you muttered, slumping yourself into the recliner across from them. “Hey Mark.”

He greets you before Youngjae continued their conversation, only making you more upset. Why on the one day that you just needed some comfort did Mark have to come over? You liked him, obviously, but your boyfriend tended to put all his focus on him when he’s around.

Sighing, you got up and headed to the bedroom, just wanting a nap. You didn’t want to sulk in front of Youngjae’s friend. Maybe a little sleep would help.

You had no idea how long you were asleep, but you eventually heard Youngjae’s soothing voice waking you. Next thing you know, his lips were trailing your neck. Of course he was suddenly needy, that wasn’t a surprise.

You scrunched your face and pushed him away, not at all in the mood.

“Baby, what’s wrong?” he asked, a pout on his face. 

“I had a bad day and you didn’t even recognize it,” you mumbled.

“I’m sorry. Please tell me about your day,” he whispered, snuggling up to you.

BamBam

He’d already spent the whole week at the studio with Jaebum and every time you managed to be off work, he’d be busy. 

“Bam, please you’ve been there all week, just spend one day with me. Is that too much to ask?” you asked him as he started to put on his shoes.

“The album’s not going to make itself. I promised the guys and my fans I’d work harder,” he replied, looking up at you. 

“They all know you work really hard, don’t you ever want to give yourself a break?”

He looked at you for a moment longer before a small smile broke out on his face. “Look we can get a quickie in, if you want. But I’m going to the studio today.” He stood up, taking his shoes back of before walking towards you.

“No,” you said, holding your hand out to stop him. “I’m not having sex with you for five minutes and then you leave for another five hours.”

“Y/N,” he said, but you ignored him, walking out of the room. Needless to say he called JB and told him he wasn’t feeling well and stayed home, doing anything he could to get himself back on your good side.

Yugyeom

You and Yugyeom were on a date. It was lowkey and cute. He’d taken you to the park because he just needed to get out of the house for a bit and he wanted to treat you to a relaxing walk. 

At one point, you were passing the doggy park. You were feeling a bit tired, but as soon as Yugyeom saw the dogs, he lead you to them.

“Yugyeom, just for a minute, okay? I’m tired,” you whined.

“Alright,” he said with a smile before turning to the puppies. But he took longer than you’d hoped, because he ended up playing with the puppies for nearly an hour. The whole time, he paid little to no attention to you, just causing you to sulk and pout. 

When you finally got home, you could immediately tell he needed you because his hands never left your hips, but when you walked into the door and he tried to pull you to him, you retreated pulling away.

“Hey,” he said. “What did I do?”

“You paid more attention to the dogs than me.”

Yugyeom would simply smile and find you adorable in that moment. “You’re jealous of some cute dogs?”

You frowned and crossed your arms. “I’m cute, too.”

This caused him to chuckle and boop your nose. “Yes you are.”

masterlist

[whatshethinks]

What happened?

BUT OK, MONDAY NIGHT AROUND 7pm - he picked me  up at KFC Marisol and then I got him fries and burger. And he was like whaaat you didnt hafto! I was like i know its cool

And then we got into his car, and he was all giddy and I was too, definitely. And then, I hand fed him fries and he was shooketh. And then I was like jeez, just eat it already. Hahaha! Tapos ayun he got used to me handfeeding him the fries and shit.

Then I was like hey where are you taking me (eh before when he was back in Cali, we talked about how I  had a dream about him and I having sex at Clark, CDC parade grounds) and he was like Im taking us to CDC HAHAHAHA

And then otw to Clark, I was asking him questions about his life like who he lives with in Cali, if he prefers his mom than his dad HAHAHA

So he was answering them, okay. Happily. So i kept going. Once we got to CDC, we just had parked car conversations. And we was eating fries (he's conscious about his diet so he tries so hard not to eat as many fries) and then while I was talking and singing he would just stare at me. Dead ass serious like stare like SEXY stare, like IM GOING TO  KISS YOU NOW stare.

Ofc I was a tease, so I came close to his face and said "what are you doing?" in a sexy voice (at least I thought it was sexy) and then he was brushing my face and hair with his fingers

Okay so! THE STARE. That fucking stare, was so fucking sexy and shit I can cum just by his stare. Ive never had someone stare at me that way before.

So he was staring at me! And I was wearing this baggy  knitted sweater from H&M and while he was staring, I was lowkey tryna make the sleeves fall off my shoulder like the slut I am. So his californian ass was like: damn mami

And then, I was singing Ivy - Frank Ocean, cause thats what was playing. And he suddenly kissed me. And we started making out you know, and he was grabbing my tits and shit, thank god they grew. And then he was like "oh my god" I was like "hehe what, why?"

And then, I got all heated up. I took off my sweater! And I was wearing a bra and jeans only by this time, and he was like "fuck, you're so hot" and then he would bite his lips and stop and just stare at my tits. Like as if they're the biggest tits he's ever seen. Validation right there for me!

And then, things are getting heated. He was trying to remove my pants, I said "adrian" and he would get his hands off immediately off me. Which was n extra turn on! Cause damn, I like me a good boy too mamas. And then I was kissing his neck. He smelled so good. And thats not even the best part of his body yet.

I went and touch his peepee, and then damn. That shit was hard as fuck and LONG... So I was like "oh my god" under my breath. And he removed them shorts immediately.

When he removed them, I was like "fuckkkkkk" cause jesus christ. I dove my mouth into that dick real quick!

His groin smells so good. Like every corner and inch. Which is so hard to believe cause he didn't come from his house, he came from a fucking funeral with his friends for fucks sake. How does it smell so good. So ofc, I had to show him my skills. My god, I sucked that dick for so long my jaw almost locked. Long story short, he didn't cum. He face fucked me while standing upin the car (thank you, Toyota Innova for having a huge ass space inside) and then I deepthroated without a doubt.

And then, he wanted to fuck - "wanna get a room?"

Me: Not yet, be patient Adrian: Fine baby

After a few mins, he tried to squeeze my butt but my ass small so barely squeezed anything. But thats okay.

And then I had to remind him I was on my period. He was like "Oh shit I totally forgot about that"

- We were smoking weed too on the drive to Clark, like the vape pen whatever you had before.

And then oh my god, honest to god the way he kisses me was so good. He would hold my face and squeeze my mouth with his hand and just fucking eat my whole face. And god, if someone was taking a video of it - they would have came.

It was the best kiss I've ever had. And then we'd take pauses after a few minutes. And I lied down on his chest and just feel his chest and arms and tattoos. And then, he would trace his fingers on my back and hair and give me FUCKING SMOOCHES.

R O M A N T I C!

So thats the fucking signal I picked up right? Cause who the fuck gives smooches to someone you just wanna fuck??!

Smooches are for "I wanna keep seeing you you adorable slut" not "I will hit you up only when Im horny"

So i was so gooey with all the smooches and the finger tracing and shit. I was rubbing his chest. And all that ROMANCE shit!

After a while, we decided to order takeout from Mcdonalds. And then, I offered to pay. He was like:

What are you doing? Let's half What are you thinking? Stop!!! Put that back

So he grabbed my wallet and fucking threw that shit back in my bag and said

Wag ka maglalabas ng pera pag kasama mo ko

So of course I went all soft and shit, once again!

While we were waiting for our takeout, I hand fed him fries again with caramel sundae this time. He was like "Im more of a chocolate sundae guy" but he still ate. Then he ate his burger. And then it was so cute cause the servers from McDonalds came out to deliver our food, and there were two of them... and they were all giggling and shit when they handed the 1 pc of burger and giggling when they left too.

I was like, "oooh they like you" He was like "they didnt have to go in pairs when they gave us this burger naman diba" I was like "they probably like you"

I wish I could say, thats my boyfriend.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Then he started sharing his life story back in the Philippines. Where he did a feeding program for his birthday 2 years ago and shit. How he got that trait from his mom and all. How he would do that again after a year. Then he dropped me off at Marisol, the gate at the kanto where you have to enter. I didnt let him drop me off at my house per se.

Then while I was fixing my stuff, he was like are you sure you're okay to walk home? I was like, yeah Im a big girl.

And he laughed, and was like "come here baby" and was gesturing a hug. So he hugged and fucking GAVE. ME. SMOOCHES. AGAIN.

I texted him at 6am to ask if I left my brella in his car. And then he replied at almost 2pm. When I saw that he was online at like 12pm (Facebook). But I brushed it off. Then, his message was dry as usual.

He acknowledged my head and I said we'd transfer to Telegram cause Im at work, but it was just small talk like I asked him when is he gonna pick his dog up downtown so I can meet his dog, Samson. He was like, "Ill def let you meet him, imma take him to CDC some time and you can come with"

And then, I was like Ill look forward to that and shit

And I sent a meme, and he just said "that is me" and I didnt reply na.

I texted him when I got out of work, you know - lowkey dropping hints and shit. And he replied 4 hours later. I just assumed he's with his friends

We talked during dinner and while I waited for his reply, I slept at 12am. And then he replied at 2am. And then I woke up at 5:30am for work, and he said "aga mo nagigising" and I said yeah and he was like "hatid kita sa work" and shit, but as the good girl and angel that I am, I said "No, pahinga ka nalang"

Then when I got out of work again, I asked him where he was at. And he said he just woke up but he was online for hours before that on Facebook. And he had plans with his family for his cousin's birthday and I was like oh okay.

And he said, puntahan kita mamaya? Ofc my heart went oops! Hahaha.

Okay I waited from 6pm to 9pm for him, and I was so tiired and sleepy already and when we met I was like I deserve an apology and he was like, matagal ba? Shet sorry talaga. Sinurprise pa kasi namin cousin ko.

And I was like, yeah a bit but its fine, tulugan nalang kita haha.

And then, I was so tired I couldnt think of a convo. So I asked him where he was planning to take me, and he said, up to you. I was like, anywhere.

And we ended up in a motel LOL. Like jesus christ, how can I say no now.

We got in the motel room, and oh, I forgot to mention on the way to the motel - I told him I got him a gift, cause his bday was on Sept 24th and he was like "OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOINNNNNNNNN, WHY DID YOU DO THAT"

He was prolly thinking I got him a watch or something like a scrapbook, LMFAO.

Then when we got to the motel, I gave him my gift, which was weed. I was like, I picked those up from the streets. And he was like "oh shiiiiit, you didnt have to" I was like, I know it no biggie.

Then he was like, "shit babyyyy, thank you"

And then we lied down and I was wearing a mini skirt and sweater. And he saw skirt go up and he was like "oh fuck" and then we made out and then I removed my sweater, and bra he was like "oh my god"

And then he slipped my panties to the side, and oof I liked that very much, thank you. And then, from missionary, we went to doggy. And then he was like - can I cum inside, and I didnt hear him the first time and the second time, so the third time, he was like "can. i cum. inside?" and I said, oh yeah go.

"are you sure?" "Yes haha"

and then he fucking did, it was so hot.

The sex is not as good as Kyle, as well as the dick feels. Ya know!? Hahaha but I dont mind.

and then I went to pee and I showed him my underwear with his cum on it LMFAO. And then he was like shookth

And then, we watched Rick and Morty for a while and then he turned the TV on and then in the movie, there was a funeral. And he switched it off, we ended up watching 1 ep of Brooklyn 99 and then we sang the intro of B99 together, unscripted. How cute was that. Cute as fuck.

Then you know how high people laugh, theyre just like "he.he.he" that was our laugh all through out the episode. HAHAHAHA we cute as fuck.

Then someone called him, a guy. I was assuming it was his cousin or something. Asking him what time he'll be home and where he's at.

Ever since then, he felt so uneasy. And off... I was making out with him, he was hard but it would just die. We were blaming the aircon LMFAO, and then I was like hey its okay. So we ended up spooning instead and he was playing with my titties and then, we tried again. And then, he got hard and died again. He was like "fuckkk so sorry baby, I've never had this problem before haha idk why its acting up right now"

I was like hey its okay, so I gave him head. And we started trying again, then ayun after a few mins. He was able to cum, and he came on my pussy naman.

We cuddled after cleaning up, and then he was staring into space, I was like whats wrong? You okay?

Yeah I am, why whats wrong? Ikaw ok ka lang?

Me: Yeah Im okay, you seem off lang

Adrian: No, wala wala. Dont mind me..

Me: Aww, its gonna be okay.

Adrian: De kasi, kanina sa movie may nakita akong coffin... naaala ko sya (his bestfriend who died whos the reason why hes back in the PH)

Me: oh shit, sorry.

And then he was like, no its okay... And then I was like you wanna bounce na ba?

Adrian: Ok lang ba? Kasi I actually have to go.

Me: What, of course its okay. I get it!

A: You sure ha? Feel ko galit ka...

Me: What, noo come  here. *kissed*

A: Sorry talaga

Then we checked out

The trip back home was awkward but we kissed goodbye and shit. And then the awkward texts came.

also forgot to mention, I asked why didnt he cum on my face and he was like: well I still wanted to kiss you after (:

[tigertae]

70 horrible questions

UWaaaaa I got tagged by @acelululala​. Thanks you sweetie~ <3

It’s under the cut cause it’s pretty long :’D

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? Me and my mom are very close as of now. But me and my dad never really speak :’D  02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? I don’t remember O_O 03: Do you regret anything? Yes. Who doesn’t :’) 04: Are you insecure? Very..... OTL 05: What is your relationship status? Single. And that’s how I like it :’D 06: How do you want to die? Uhm.... As less painful as possible?  07: What did you last eat? a little cake filled with custard. 08: Played any sports? When I was really little I played volleyball. I don’t remember much of it tho. lol 09: Do you bite your nails? Not anymore~ 10: When was your last physical fight? uhm.... 10-12 years ago.  11: Do you like someone? Yes. :’D 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? Yup.....  13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? Yea. Trump :’D  14: Do you miss someone? Yea 15: Have any pets? Yup~ We have a doggie called Jemie <33333 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? Neutral?.... No... Slightly annoyed actually.... My mom’s boyfriend just told us off over something HE always does....... 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? Nooo 18: Are you scared of spiders? No. I was tho. Not anymore~ 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? Yes. But only if it’s to give advice or something... Not to stay. 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? Wha? What is snogged?..... /looks it up/ oh.... uhm.... In a car? Yea. It was in a car....  21: What are your plans for this weekend? Lol the weekend just ended. But I have no plans for any weekend tho lol. I’m poor and my friends live far away from me and never want to come over :’D 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? Nope.  23: Do you have piercings? How many? I have tunnels in my ears~ Does that count? 14mm. 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? English! :D and artsy things. 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? I do.... :( this question made me saaaaad ;A; 26: What are you craving right now? Lately I crave pizza alot of the time. 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? I don’t know.... I hope not ;A; well... I think I have tho... I turned down 2 guys before.... and I was the one that broke up with my ex... ;A;  28: Have you ever been cheated on? Nope 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? I don’t know... Does during a break up count?... Cause then yes.... ;-; 30: What’s irritating you right now? My mom’s BF :’D 31: Does somebody love you? I hope so :’D 32: What is your favourite color? omfg I had fav colors but really I just love all colors. I love colors~ 33: Do you have trust issues? I don’t know... I don’t think so? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? I always dream full stories so.... I’m going to try to make it short. I was in some kind of mall and my mom and my bro where there and we were searching for something and there were objects all over the place so we had to maneuver over them to get somewhere.... and at one point I was flying :’D 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? My mom I think 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? No. I’m actually kinda harsh in that point... :’D I do give someone a second chance but it depends on the thing they did. I had a friend once who basically wished me dead and told me to kill myself and all that nasty stuff... When she called me a few days after that I told her to not call me again and just hung up.... :’D 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? Idk...  38: Is this year the best year of your life? The year just started.  39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? Uuuuuuuuhm 20? 21? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? No. lol 51: Favourite food? Pffffft idk... I love so many foods... But we have this dish in the Netherlands that’s called “Boerenkool” and my mom makes the best. With bacon and “Unox Worst” <333333 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? I guess.... But the universe hates my guts if that’s true 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Kakaotalk 54: Is cheating ever okay? NO!! 55: Are you mean? I hope not :’D  56: How many people have you fist fought? 2. My bro and a girl from school. 57: Do you believe in true love? Not reallly.. 58: Favourite weather? 24 C with a slight little wind 59: Do you like the snow? It depends.... Playing with snow is nice but when you have to travel through it, it’s not... 60: Do you wanna get married? Nope. 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? I guess? :’D 62: What makes you happy? SHINee~ <3 63: Would you change your name?   Yes. Cause my actual name is Kimberley. I’d rather change it to Kim permanently. I love my last name tho “van der Linden”. It sounds super fancy lol. Also it fits behind literally ANY name. 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? Yes. Since she lives 3 countries away. lol And if she was right here it would still be hard tho...  65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? This happened to me irl and it was complicated asFuCK... I liked him back and then we kissed and then it was all a mess and complicated and.... we don’t speak to each other anymore now, so..... And I miss him alot actually..... Gahd.... I’m trying real hard to forget about him tbh.... 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? Nope. 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? My bro. :’D 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? A friend on Kakaotalk. :) 69: Do you believe in soulmates? Idk.... That stuff is really complicated since people change throughout the years... That’s why I don’t really believe in true love either. 70: Is there anyone you would die for? Yes. Absolutely.

This was kinda hard :’D Hah~ But thank you so much for tagging me <333 But I’m not going to tag anyone tho OTL Im sorry OTL ^^”

[mynighttimenarrative-blog]

Day 2

The next day, Saturday, I started kind of early, it might have been around 9 when I hopped in the truck and started to drive around.  I was a little less nervous and a little more prepared.   I was ready to see where the night would take me.  My first fare were a couple of boys heading downtown,n they were chatting about where they wanted to be stationed, joking and laughing when one of them says that they wanted to be stationed in Alaska.  The one in the passenger seat turns towards the one that had just said they wanted to stay in Alaska and says "Dude why do you want to be stationed in Alaska? You're going to be the front line of  protecting penguins!"  They all start laughimg at him including me.  The one in the passenger seat, trying to be cute says "Dumb! dude penguins are in Antarctica" Again they laugh and continue to joke.  Eventually I zone outvof their conversation.

The next few fares are kind of a blur, I don't remember the people or their conversations.   I'm polite and I ask how their night has been or where they're going.  I make the correct small talk but it's the same conversation over and over again.   Somehow I ended up downtown, I got a request to pick up a lady so I navigate to the destination and I am trying really hard to find a place to park but if you have ever been downtown you know how hard that is.  I managed to park in a taxi pick up area and text my fare.  Almost immediate I received a fall from her.   I asked her where she is and she tells me that she's down at Margaritaville.   I didn't know it at the time but this place is located on the Riverwalk. So anyway, I tell her that I'm parked in a taxi pick-up area and I would like to know where she was so that I can pick her up.  She tells me that I have passed the area where she is located I tell her that I'm sorry for this but it was hard to find parking.   I tell her that if she could just give me 3 minutes I can circle around and pick her up closer to where she is.  But no, this lady is super rude. With an attitude she starts to tell me how she has children and how they are cold and she doesn't even bother to listen and understand that it is a Saturday night, it is packed with traffic nearly impossible to park!  Instead she is just rude she cuts me off hangs up and cancel the entire Uber trip.

Even though this has been my one and only rude experience picking up someone downtown I'm determined to keep it that way.  Every single time I get within a 5-mile radius of downtown I go offline.  I mean I don't mind dropping somebody off downtown but I hate having to find someone to pick them up so now I just avoid it.   I don't know how people are so blind.  I mean cant ypu see how impossible it is to get to certain locations? And serioisly "ypur children"?? What the heck are ypu and your children doing this late out at Margaritaville no less! Oh wait ypu must be one of those "Im mother of the year" women.  I seriously don't like some people. I am really convinced we need a plague. Something like put of Inferno by Dan Brown.

For this next fare I will probably have to do a side story for.  I went and I pick him up and he was pretty cute really nice and pretty friendly we had a good flow of conversation pur entire ride.  Once we were at his destination and I dropped him off he asked for my number and gave it to him and we have been messenging   since then, until today, because I found out he's a dirtbag. But I will have a side story later with our messages so you can see what a dirt bag he was. 

Just when I think my night is going to be full of boring fares, I get an Uber request.  I navigate myself to the location, it turns out it's a very dark house, but I sit there and I wait anyway.  I waited the allowed five minutes before I sent them a text to let them know that I'm waiting outside the house.  Immediately I get a call from my fare, they tell me that they are at the Thirsty Horse, which is literally down the street and that they weren't sure how to use the Uber app so they accidentally put the wrong address.  I told him I can be there in less than 3 minutes since it is down the street.  They agree since it was their fault they say they will wait for me.

When I get there I park and I and text them to let them know that I am there.  They respond saying they'll be outside in a minute, so again, I wait.  But less than a minute later a man approaches my truck tells me his name and asks me for mine.   He tells me that they have been outside for a while but his girlfriend is completely wasted and she doesn't want to go home.  He points in her direction and I see the other couple trying to convince her to come get in the truck.  The man keeps apologizing as we're watching this other couple lead his drunk girlfriend by the hand towards my truck trying to convince her that it's time to go.   The drunk girlfriend is wearing a black tiny tube top dress, by this time the girl from the other couple is really pulling her towards the truck but the drunk girl is really fighting her while the other girl's boyfriend is trying to guide them towards the truck.  With all this commotion her tube top fell down exposing her but she did not care she just put the girls back in and continue to fight saying that she was not was not going home.

It took a few minutes to finally get the girl close enough to where her boyfriend could scoop her up and throw her in the truck and close the door behind her, he then goes around the truck and gets in the middle next to her and his friend gets in next to him behind the passenger seat while that guy's girlfriend gets in the passenger seat besides me.  This  whole time I have the radio off because they're trying to guide me to their home because they didn't put in the right address.  I begin driving to where they're telling me to go,  the whole time the drunk girl behind me is crying.  She was mumbling and from what I could hear her boyfriend had done something inside the club to make her jealous and insecure.   When things got really quiet for a minute it really got awkward because all we could hear was her cry so I randomly just asked if I could turn on the radio.   They said sure and the girl beside me even asked if she could change the station which I agreed then they started to make small talk and laugh trying to pretend that that girl wasn't crying. 

Then out of no where the drunk girl behind me is yelling in my ear for me to stop the truck and pull over.  I'm kind of freaking out because I really don't know what to do, the girl beside me is telling me to keep driving and so are the guys.  I'm really worried at the moment because I'm starting to get scared that this girl is going to throw up everywhere.  So I let the guy know that that the bucket is there for her to use if she needs to,  there's tissues and there's gum in the seats and more doggie bags in the seat behind me if she needs them.  But the drunk girl is begging for me to pull over and I really don't know what to do.  The girl beside me is telling me to keep driving and the drunk girls boyfriend is yelling at her that they are not pulling over that if she has to throw up she's going to throw up in the bucket.

At this moment we hit 1604 and we ended up at a stoplight, even though she was really drunk she was pretty quick at unlocking the doors and trying to get out.  But her boyfriend was just as quick and managed to close the door and hold her in place.  She started crying and mumbling again about something he did and how she wanted to get out and how she didn't want to be with him anymore.   I could tell the boyfriend was getting angry but seriously who wouldn't even I was getting annoyed.  The girl beside me kept guiding me onto the highway saying we were almost there trying to reassure me.  

This is where s*** hits the fan.  She says she needs air so the boyfriend allows her to lower down the window.  For a while she's doing good we are all doing good I'm slowly picking up speed heading for a 50 miles an hour slowly climbing the way up ready to get them home.  Out of nowhere I guess the boyfriend had let her go because she was doing so well that this girl decidesits a good idea to pretty much attempt to jumped out the window.  I quickly turn on the emergency lights and move to the right shoulder while the boyfriend is hanging on to the drunk girls hips.  I look in my side mirror and the girl is just hanging there.  She is yelling at her boyfriend to just let her go, that she wants to jump out, to leave her there.  That she is just done with him.

Everyone starts yelling at the same time.  Telling her that she's endangering everyone, that she needs to get it together, that they're almost home, to just calm down, but the more they yell at her the more hysterical this girl is becoming and trying really hard to jump out the window on to the highway.  It's pretty dark and I really can't tell what's happening in the back seat I can only see the girl struggling to get out the window through my side mirror.  

Somehow the boyfriend manages to drag the girl back in, I'm relieved thinking that we are almost there.  She just needs to stay calm and he needs to hold her for a few more minutes and then we will be fine and they will be out of my truck soon.  The girl besides me tells me to go ahead and keep driving that we should be there in a few more minutes.  But again out of nowhere I hear the boyfriend say "What the f***!  Somebody call the police!  She f****** punched me!"   Again they are start yelling at the drunk girl again making her go even more crazy.  Finally the guy who is behind his girlfriend in the passengers seat who hadn't said a word finally says "Why would you do that man? You shouldn't do that!"  Simultaneously I hear the girl really started to cry hard.   I'm assuming the boyfriend did something really underhanded to her to make her start crying.  At this time I see, in my rearview mirror, is a friend jumping between the couple to separate them.  Now that the friend is sitting between them,  the couple start to yell horrible things to each other, and I mean really horrible things to where I think they broke up.  The other couples trying to calm them down saying that they're just drunk and they don't mean what they're saying.  But the drunk girl is crying really really hard the other guy is just cussing at her telling her shut up and just being really ugly. v

Eventually we finally reach their destination... And words can not describe my relief!  The boyfriend takes off with his friend and the girl that was sitting besides me gets out to help the drunk girl get out of my truck and leads her to an apartment.  The guys come back, and the one who was being really ugly is apologizing profusely and hands me a $30 tip.  All I do is wish him luck and a good night.  I park my truck to make sure that there's no damage in my backseat, thankfully there isn't.  While I am checking my truck the quiet guys comes back saying saying that the drunk girl lost her purse.   I let him check the entire truck but tell him that she probably lost her purse when she was hanging out the window on the highway.  He agrees with me and wishes me a good night and walks off.  

 I quickly got out of there.  I think I had my fill of excitement this night, I went offline and headed home.