#in case i didn’t make it obvious enough i multiship

[bluerose5]

Nostalgia

"Tell me something about yourself."

Anders’s hands stopped in their tracks. Golden brown eyes glanced up at Garrett, curious about what brought on such a request.

He returned to healing Garrett's wound, brow furrowed as he concentrated on knitting the flesh together. Slowly but surely, the large gash on his arm started to seal closed.

"Like what?" Anders asked. "Have we not been getting to know each other all this time?"

"Well, we have," Garrett said, then added, "in a way. Even then, I feel like so much of you is still a mystery. The Grey Warden thing, I get. The apostate thing, I get. Even the whole merging with Justice thing, I get."

"But...?" Anders trailed off.

"But you don't tell me much about you." Garrett watched him closely, searching for any change in his expression. "I've seen you joke around with the others. Then, as soon as I walk into the room, you get all serious and quiet. You've told me plenty about the mages' plight, which is fine, but I just want to know more, you know?"

"Is that your way of telling me that I need to lighten up?" Anders questioned, head cocked to the side as he peered over at him.

Even after the wound was healed, Anders’s touch lingered on his arm.

Neither one of them tried to move away.

"If that's how you choose to take it." Garrett shrugged nonchalantly. "I don't mind being that guy that you can vent to about your frustrations. I'm glad that you trust me enough to share your concerns; but if I'm right about you —and something is telling me that I am— then there's more to you than you let on."

"Okay, and if there is?"

Garrett leaned in with a roguish grin, dark curls falling into warm, brown eyes.

Anders swallowed thickly.

His heart skipped a beat.

"Then I plan on finding out what."

"Heh," Anders laughed in an attempt to cover up how flustered he was. He dropped Garrett's arm as if his skin was on fire, taking a second to brush his hair back behind his ears. "What a tease you are, Garrett Hawke." After a slight pause, he glanced over at him. "What would you know of me?"

Garrett's grin softened into a smile.

"Oh, that's easy," he hummed. "Favorite color?"

"Red," Anders answered without skipping a beat.

Walking around the clinic, he started to straighten up, cleaning every surface as best as he could while taking inventory of his supplies.

"Really?"

"Yeah." For some reason, Anders felt the need to explain further. "It's a very versatile color. Bold and passionate, dangerous yet warm..."

"I'll have to keep that in mind."

Right.

"Anything else, or was this all just an excuse to find out what my favorite color is?"

Garrett snorted.

"I'm just getting started." He leaned his weight back onto his hands, kicking his legs out from the crate he was sitting on. "Tell me, when you're not out striving for mages' freedom, what do you do in your free time?" Garrett thought it over, then took a guess, not even giving Anders a chance to respond first. "Do you like to write?"

Anders wrinkled his nose.

"Not particularly."

"Seriously?" Garrett blinked owlishly at him. "Huh. Interesting."

"What?"

"Nothing, nothing. It's just that you're so good at it."

Wait, did that mean...

"Garrett Hawke," Anders said, "did you actually read my manifesto?"

"Perhaps." Garrett beamed at him, his eyes crinkled at the corners. "Does this mean you'll stop leaving copies all over my estate?"

"Maybe." With his back to Garrett, Anders clutched a pile of clean linens to his chest in an attempt to muffle the pounding of his heart. Anders wouldn't be surprised if Garrett could hear it from across the room. "Maybe I could leave other notes for you to find."

"Now, that's a challenge that I would gladly accept."

"Guess my Circle education is finally paying off," Anders joked. "As for hobbies, though." Anders sighed, chewing on the inside of his cheek. "Oh, I don't know. Ever since I last escaped, I can't honestly remember when I've done anything for myself. Back then, I was with the Wardens. After I got away from them, all of my time here has been split between the clinic and the Mage Underground."

"When you're not with me, at least."

"True." He shrugged. "So, yeah. When I'm not playing cards with you lot at The Hanged Man, I don't do much. Pathetic, right?"

"No," Garrett huffed, glaring at him for making that jab at himself. "It means you're dedicated to what you do."

"That's one way of looking at it."

Humming in contemplation, Garrett sat there, deep in thought.

Eventually, he spoke up.

"Well, what would you like to do?"

"Excuse me?"

Garrett rolled his eyes, shaking his head at Anders with a fond smile.

"What would you like to do?" he repeated. "You and Justice?"

"Justice?"

"Is there an echo in here?" Garrett teased. "Yes, you and Justice. Say what you want. You may not 'hear' him, but he must have some kind of influence if you're both two halves of a whole."

"Such a huge simplification of our... arrangement."

"Yet you don't deny it. Come on," Garrett insisted. "The clinic is empty at the moment. I know for certain that today has been a quiet one for the Underground, so let's go have some fun. Alone. Together."

"What do you have in mind?" Anders asked, wary.

"Whatever you want."

Anders considered his options.

Setting the linens aside, the words came to him, unbidden.

"I'd like to go fishing."

At Garrett's surprised look, Anders grimaced.

"My father, he was always a stern man," he explained. A wistful sense of nostalgia settled deep into his bones. "But he was a proud father before my magic manifested."

Anders stared down at his hands, flexing them through the aches from years of healing and spellcasting.

"He used to take me to a lake not far outside of our village. We would take to the docks for hours. I would run around with fistfuls of worms and bugs for bait." Anders scoffed. "Every time I caught something, even if it was just trash, I would get so excited. I could have caught the smallest minnow, and he would brag about how strong I was."

And all it took to destroy that bond was fear.

Anders wouldn't linger on that, though.

"I mean, we don't have to fish, but perhaps we can take a walk down to the docks. Clear our heads a little?" Already, he could see the rhythmic motion of the waves, smell the tang of salt in the air. "Well, if you can sit still for that long."

Garrett chuckled.

Jumping down from his perch, he approached Anders’s position, hesitating before he took his hand into his own.

"For you, I'll try my best."

[13iamlucky13]

Rating Bandori Ships - Moca Edition:

Alright so as is probably obvious for anyone whose talked to me, I have a lot of opinions and I like to talk about my opinions. And one thing my poor multishipper heart has a lot of opinions on is Bandori ships because this fandom is either multiship heaven or hell depending on how you look at it.

So I decided 'hey why not pop off about them' so that's what I'm going to do startig with a certain Moca Aoba who I am totally not at all biased towards.

Obligatory reminder that these are just my opinions and this isn't meant as an attack on any ship. Not that I feel particularly negative towards any Moca ship I've seen yet but still.

Ratings:

MocaRan- 10/10

Yes I like the main arguably somewhat overrated Moca ship. What can I say? They have so much canon interaction between the two of them and their dynamic is really what got me started towards getting severely hooked on Bandori as I am now. They both are shown to care deeply for each other and seem to get the other on a really deep level. For Moca, Ran seems to bring out the most genuine shows of emotion out of her while also being a good support for her, if in a very Ran way. For Ran, Moca seems to help her take things a little less seriously, and when necessary acts as a shoulder to cry on. Sasquana broke me.

LisaMoca- 7/10

I enjoy this ship. As much as it seems to be just kind of a toss on to the people who ship YukiRan (which don't get me wrong is also a very great ship I have a thing for rivalries with tension) Lisa and Moca have a great dynamic. I tend to see it as a brOTP more often which is why I didn't give it a 9 or 10 but they definitely have potential and them kissing on company time would definitely catch my interest. They also seem like they'd be a really supportive relationship. Moca can help Lisa chill out and not be so hard on herself and Lisa can motivate Moca to do things.

MocaHima- 6/10

This is another situation where I have a harder time seeing it as anything but some very good platonic love. They have a dynamic together that is extremely fun don't get me wrong, but by that token I don't feel the same tension between them. Moca's teasing of Himari tends to feel like less flirting in disguise and more like the way she'd tease a sibling. Besides Himari clearly has a type and Idk how much Moca fits that. They are shown to care for each other quite a lot though and in a situation where they are plopped together romantically I can see them having a wholesome dynamic since they have such a good platonic base

SayoMoca- 9/10

I've seen this all of once that didn't involve the two of them in an OT3 with Tsugu, and honestly? I'm kinda there for both, but this is just about Sayo and Moca. Now this is mainly because grumpy x clown is my jam, I really don't know how much canon there actually is to go on here. I really like the idea of them both bonding over how ridiculous Yukina and Ran's posturing can be, Moca narrating every encounter like a sports commentator for fun with Sayo acting like she's ignoring it but quietly adding in her own remarks and Moca catching them. There's also potential in Lisa sorta shoving them together either to try to help motivate Moca or maybe to help Sayo with Hina in a way by giving her 'practice' with the other eccentric genius of Bandori. Either way there's a lot of ways to kickstart it but once it gets going I also think they would have a really good dynamic for somewhat similar reasons to LisaMoca with a side of it seeming similarly balanced to MocaRan.

HinaMoca- 8/10

I'm honestly not too sure why I jam with these guys together as much as I do but that doesn't stop me. One of them is enough to cause chaos so what happens when you put the both of them together? Also they would be the types to blast an extra bassboosted version of Megalovina or even just play it on guitar at their wedding if they even bothered to do something as traditional as that and I'd be there for it

ChisaMoca- 7/10

This is a ship I've been slowly warming up to so this rating is kinda subject to change. Initially I didn't understand it as they barely interact in canon and I didn't see much potential in their dynamic but the more I think on it the more there seems to be. This is mainly because, in one case a literal sense, both are actresses. Chisato literally but Moca definitely puts on her own acts and clown show. So the idea of the two being able to peek under the other's mask is kind of interesting to me. Also serious x clown will never not vibe

MisaMoca- 8/10

I don't ship this in a serious sense so I can't give it full marks but in comedy or crack, even crack taken seriously they are god tier. They're the types who would behave like an old married couple but somehow in a really chill low-energy way. There's a great fic that has them having an ironic candle-lit dinner date that sums up why pretty well I can link it if anyone sees this and wants it

TomoMoca- 6/10

Pretty much the same as HimaMoca except instead of Moca not being Tomoe's type it's more about how even if they did both have mutual feelings I have a hard time figuring out how they'd get together in the first place. Tomoe probably wouldn't realize her feelings even if she had them and Moca would do her best to bury them under humor and good ol emotional suppression. If they did manage to get together though I can see them being cute.

SaayaMoca- 5/10

I don't really feel much when it comes to this as a romantic ship. It's there I guess? I like these guys a lot platonically and don't have a reason to dislike it romantically but it doesn't really make me feel anything. There's potential but I just feel like on most fronts LisaMoca is superior.

MocaTsugu- 11/10

Probably my OTP for the fandom if I'm being honest and the fact that it's chronically underrated hurts. Don't get me wrong I adore MocaRan and SayoTsugu is also very good I've got nothing against the chocomints, but come on. The obvious name play is right there! In all seriousness though I love these guys both as a platonic and romantic pairing so much. It might just be me, but I swear it feels like every time Moca's ever actively suggested something Tsugu was the first to jump on the support train. Moca doesn't seem to really punch down with her teasing of Tsugu the same way she does with Himari and Ran either, and if I remember right there's been at least a few times it's seemed to border on flirting territory even when considering it's Moca. The two also have several of the things the other Moca ships have going for them but I think these two do it better. Tsugu being a gentle but consistent motivator who deeply cares for Moca gives me life. And Moca herself has potential to be a calming presence with her chill demeanor who could get Tsugu to take a break for once in her life like she deserves. I'm also absolute trash for the headcanon that Afterglow all took turns having crushes on Tsugu in middle school. I just like the idea that Moca never really got over that crush and it comes back in full force once they're in highschool. Pair that with some good Tsugu lacking self-worth angst and believing her feelings towards Moca aren't reciprocated because Moca clearly has a thing for Ran and even if she doesn't there's still no way she has feelings for her no matter how many times she calls her 'Tsugurific'.

And there ya go. This ended up way longer than I expected it to and tbh for most of them I have a lot more thoughts but I didn't want to turn this into a novel. Tldr MocaTsugu underrated and I have no life :')

[bemused-writer]

Analysis of Subaru, Kamui, and Subaru/Kamui

Ever since I first read X/1999 I was of the Subaru/Kamui persuasion. The two have each suffered a great deal and went out of their way to support one another; every single scene they have is of them doing just that as best they can. And since I have returned to my X/1999 obsession with a vengeance, I figure it’s time to take a look at this ship–and the characters themselves–with everything I got. Technically, this is not a “confirmed” ship. Technically, there are a lot of unconfirmed or implied ships floating around X/1999. I figure that's on account of CLAMP’s multishipping tendencies. Anyhow…

Before we get into this, I won't be taking Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicles into account for two reasons: 1) It is an AU and therefore is supposed to give us an alternative look at the characters and 2) If I start including the plotlines of Tsubasa we will never finish this review. X/1999 is already plenty long. 8D I might do a separate post about their interactions in Tsubasa once I reread that manga, though.

With that out of the way, let’s take a look. One of the most obvious things people have to say about these two is that they’re reflections of each other. They’ve been through similar experiences and similar traumas. Their reactions to those experiences are quite different, however, and goes a long way towards explaining why they take separate paths later in the series. Let’s start with their first meeting.

When Subaru first meets Kamui, it’s literally at the worst phase of Kamui’s life. His best friend, Fuuma, has just had his brain washed thanks to fate (!) and the woman he loved, Kotori, was murdered by said best friend right before his eyes. As if all that wasn’t bad enough, he was nearly killed by Fuuma as well, which took on a weird, sexual vibe, which becomes pretty consistent on Fuuma’s part throughout the series.

All of this is extremely similar to what Subaru endured at Seishirou’s hands in Tokyo Babylon years earlier (although the sexual component with Seishirou is toned down quite a bit in comparison). There are some notable differences in circumstance, however, and these circumstances are important to understanding the fundamental differences between Subaru and Kamui themselves. As Subaru says, their pain isn’t the same.

The most pertinent difference between the two is the cause that led them into a coma in the first place and what ultimately brought them out of it. For Subaru, the betrayal and abuse at the hands of the man he loved is what sent him into a coma while the death of his sister, the other person he loved most, is what brought him out of it. In other words, traumatic shock put him into a coma and traumatic shock forced him out of it. There wasn't a single moment that wasn't painful.

For Kamui, it’s quite different. The death of the woman he loved along with the betrayal and abuse at the hands of his best friend is what sent him into the coma. It was doubly traumatic because Kamui lost everything all at once. This is a big part of why Sorata was so worried Kamui would never wake up; he literally had nothing tying him to reality. The only two people he'd ever had a significant bond with were both gone in one fell swoop. The only reason he emerged from this is, of course, because of Subaru’s intervention.

Perhaps the only reason Kamui is even slightly well-adjusted is thanks to the much gentler wake-up call he had in comparison to Subaru. Frankly, after Hokuto died, Subaru didn't have anyone for nine years. It's no wonder he dwelled on nothing but Seishirou, barely managed his duties as head of the Sumeragi clan, and developed a suicidal wish to keep him going.

Kamui has Subaru, so he managed to avoid a lot of that. He's still obsessed with Fuuma, but he has other things to occupy his time with.

Some other differences in Subaru and Kamui's backstory to keep in mind: Seishirou was acting like a good guy in Tokyo Babylon. Fate had absolutely nothing to do with his transformation into a bad guy; that's just how he is. Fuuma actually was a good person who had the good persona wiped away and replaced with ... his fated personality, I suppose. I think this explains some of Kamui's stubbornness when it comes to rescuing Fuuma; he knows fate isn't fair and Fuuma was a victim of it.

Subaru has no such delusions. He knows Seishirou was playing him for a fool and he knows he has no regrets about it. It's why his wish isn't to fix Seishirou; it's merely to die at his hands, so he can finally let go of the whole thing.

And Subaru does his best to keep himself at a distance from his fellow Dragons of Heaven for the sake of this endeavor. He doesn't really befriend any of them or spend any real amount of time with them; he knows his wish will bring nothing but pain to anyone that cares for him, so he tries to avoid those attachments. I suspect we wouldn't have heard much from Subaru in this series if he hadn't become unexpectedly attached to Kamui himself.

So, let's get back to their first meeting. Kamui is in a coma and Subaru delves into his memories in order to help him. This isn't the first time Subaru has done this, and there are a few parallels to his previous case to consider with this one.

In volume 2 of Tokyo Babylon, Subaru has to help a woman, Mitsuki, that he once knew that had fallen into a coma after being sexually assaulted. It's implied this is the first time Subaru has entered someone's mind to help them, and he comments it will be easier if she remembers him at least a little. He'd been dreaming of her earlier that very day.

Now, not only does Mitsuki remember him, it's revealed that she's harbored a crush on him since they were children. It's never made very clear whether or not Subaru returns those feelings, although there are some jokes from Seishirou that she is his rival in love. Regardless, Subaru saves a woman that considers him special and only emerges from her coma thanks to Subaru's kind words.

So, when Subaru enters Kamui’s mind, he knows it will be dangerous. Kamui doesn’t know him at all; there isn’t any kind of attachment to make this easier. But the end result is very similar to what we see in Tokyo Babylon: Kamui emerges both because of Subaru’s kind words, but also because he’s found someone that understands the pain he’s been through to some degree. Both Mitsuki and Kamui reverted to childhood in their sorrow as well, a time where things were much simpler and the world easier to understand.

There’s no doubt that Kamui considers Subaru special after this. How could he not? And if we compare Kamui’s case directly with Mitsuki’s there’s at least the implication he may grow to care for Subaru in a similar fashion to Mitsuki. CLAMP went out of there way to draw as many comparisons between Subaru’s past and Kamui’s present as they could within this series, so I think it’s fair to make this assumption.

It's also notable that Subaru's own feelings on the matter are harder to read in both situations. Did he have feelings for Mitsuki or was she simply a treasured friend from his past? Her words had haunted him for years at that point, so her opinion definitely mattered. Likewise, it's harder for us to tell what he thinks about Kamui. We can tell there's a deep bond and affection there, but it's not quite as straightforward.

The hug is actually quite important here. They held one another in the dreamscape and then continued to in reality. This is interesting because neither Subaru nor Kamui are physically affectionate people. Subaru only ever hugged his sister and maintains a kind of no-contact rule with people in general. He never initiated physical contact with Seishirou throughout Tokyo Babylon and definitely doesn't in X/1999. He doesn't go out of his way to pat his fellow Dragons of Heaven on the back the way Sorata does. The only exception is Kamui.

As for Kamui, he just … isn’t affectionate. 8D You’ll recall how crabby he was at the beginning of X/1999. He was pushing everyone away in a misguided attempt at protecting them. Then, one of the only notable times he initiated physical contact was when he held Kotori in his arms and cupped Fuuma’s cheek for the last time, and that was when he was incredibly distressed and finally willing to admit how much he cared about them both.

These are two people he’s known and trusted his whole life, so it makes sense he would allow some physical contact between them. Consider how he reacts to Sorata, Keiichi, evil!Fuuma, and pretty much anyone else that tries to initiate physical contact: it’s met with either confusion, overt hostility, or acceptance without reciprocation. Honestly, Sorata’s gotten all three of these reactions… 8D

The one exception is Subaru, who he not only accepts physical contact from, but will also initiate. So, the two of them are relatively similar in how they approach this, which is something we'll see throughout this review.

While Subaru was in Kamui’s dreamscape, they discuss several important things, such as the fact Kamui is trying to escape reality and the fact nothing will change or improve if he remains in the coma. He also explains his relationship with Seishirou and how things became much worse when he refused to leave the confines of his own mind.

But there’s a small detail CLAMP drops that I always found interesting.

This isn’t meant to show Kamui as naive. On the contrary, this is actually pretty wise and gets back to Subaru’s Shinto roots. Subaru is an onmyoji, a follower of onmyodo, which is a mix of Chinese philosophy (the five elements, yin-yang theory, etc.), Buddhism, and has elements of Japanese philosophy, i.e. Shintoism.

In Shinto, things really do have lives, and they deserve respect. It's yet another demonstration of how the Sakurazukamori are the opposite of the Sumeragi; they use these basic ideals and corrupt them. Things aren’t important, and neither are people.

So, in one fell swoop, Kamui has reminded Subaru of his own philosophy and demonstrated a fundamental difference between his worldview and Seishirou’s. Kamui is approaching things from a similar place Subaru would have when he was younger (it’s hard to say how much faith Subaru has in his own practice at this point; he’s pretty jaded).

Ultimately, Subaru asks Kamui several questions that give insight into both of their mindsets while they're in the dreamscape: If his [Fuuma’s] true self is restored, are you willing to tell him you killed Kotori? Even if it means he’ll hate you? Even if you must shoulder the blame for the rest of your life? Even if no one else will understand what you wished for and the reasons why?

It’s a pretty serious line of questioning because, in all honesty, what Kamui wants is dangerous. There’s no guarantee he can ever have it, and if he does attain his wish, no one will be spared the repercussions of it, least of all himself. In contrast, Subaru’s wish is a lot less destructive for the world as a whole, but he’s still hurting the people who care about him with it. Still, a lot of these questions are probably the same ones Subaru has had to ask himself over and over again. He knows no one will understand his own wish, that he will have to shoulder the blame for it, and that some could even hate him for valuing himself so little. He's making absolutely sure that Kamui understands the repercussions.

The thing is, while Kamui is willing to shoulder all the potential problems that might arise when Fuuma is restored, he's not at all prepared to think about whether this wish is what he actually wants or if it's even worth all the other problems that will arise from it. Subaru doesn't bring any of that up likely because he's never had to think of the whole planet with his wish. This is outside his own experience. He's doing his best for Kamui, but there are some things he simply won't understand. It's why he pointed out that his pain and Kamui's pain are different; there are some things they won't understand about each other, even with these similarities.

Our next important scene with Subaru and Kamui takes on a much less dramatic tone, which is probably for the best; there’s very little chill time in this series. 8D

Kamui has enrolled in high school due to its location being where the sword will be hidden until he has need of it. He visits Kotori’s grave, which is nearby, and then goes to study with Subaru, though a fellow classmate, Keiichi, had been trying to gain his attention.

For one brief, shining moment, it’s as if we’re in a completely different series where the world isn’t about to end…

But the first thing that’s interesting about this is that it means they must be conversing off screen if they’re making plans to meet up, which is a theme that becomes very common with these two. Unlike the bulk of the Dragons of Heaven, Subaru doesn't live in the same dormitory as Kamui, so they’d have to figure out some way of meeting up. I would have liked to see some of that planning and how often they meet up to study, but CLAMP leaves all that to the imagination.

At any rate, Subaru has enrolled in the college and Kamui is worried he will get in trouble for skipping class to help him.

There’s a lot that's wrong with this. First of all, Subaru is only enrolled in college because it’s a good way of tracking down Seishirou, which Kamui swiftly picks up on. This is incredibly sad because throughout Tokyo Babylon, Subaru had been trying very hard to graduate from high school so that he could then go to college and become a zookeeper. This complete lack of interest in college or anything he once cared about is constantly present and goes a long way towards explaining why Subaru cracks as the series progresses.

Kamui is always very quick to figure out when Subaru is thinking about the Sakurazukamori even though, outside of their first meeting, he never directly brings him up of his own accord. There isn’t a single time when Kamui looks happy about it either. The sheer frequency with which Kamui brings up the Sakurazukamori makes me think he’s constantly looking for confirmation that that man really is the only person Subaru cares about, as if Kamui is hoping one day he’ll give a different response.

At any rate, what Kamui is really taking issue with here is Subaru’s smoking and his attachment to the Sakurazukamori. Subaru says he smokes because it makes him more powerful (which is such… a lie? Does he think anyone would actually believe that?) to which Kamui has this as a response:

Kamui appears sad and disappointed at the answer because it is a disappointing answer (and a lie, but I digress) and Subaru looks surprised because… I think he was actually worried Kamui thought he would be ineffective as a Dragon of Heaven due to the smoking, that it would hinder him in battle. The fact Kamui is worried about his health didn’t even cross his mind.

Their exact exchange was this:

Kamui: But… don’t you worry that it’ll–

Subaru: It’s fine. Some people find that smoking weakens their powers, but for me it has the opposite effect.

He doesn’t let Kamui finish his sentence and immediately comes across as a little defensive about the whole thing. So, yeah, Subaru didn’t think Kamui would care because he cares about Subaru. He thought Kamui only cared as the Kamui, his leader. Realizing he was mistaken changes the rest of their dynamic for the duration of their study session. Subaru snuffs out the cigarette and resumes where they’d left off.

We don’t actually get to see the rest of the study session, though it's implied it goes on for a while. Keiichi interrupts things at some point because he is determined to hangout with Kamui. His reaction to Subaru is both amusing and kind of telling.

Keiichi’s repeated apologies to Subaru for interrupting and stealing Kamui away followed up by his comment that Subaru is good-looking to Kamui really makes it sound like he thought he was interrupting a date and/or that he thinks Kamui is interested in Subaru. Especially after he turns it all around by telling Kamui that he's really good looking as well and, as if that wasn’t enough, invites him to his house and offers to tutor him.

Uh… I’m just going to say it. Keiichi has never been subtle in regards to his massive crush on Kamui and he clearly thinks he’s stealing Kamui away from a potential love interest. 8D

My goodness. XD I really don’t think Kamui picked up on any of that dynamic. He just thinks Keiichi is friendly and kind of weird. It’s like Kamui has developed Sakura syndrome and Keiichi is Tomoyo.

As for Kamui, we get an idea of how he views Subaru thanks to this exchange and it's pretty interesting. It also explains pretty much every single one of Kamui's reactions to Subaru and why their interactions go the way they do.

There’s definitely a lot of fondness there. He agrees that Subaru is good looking and we get an actual image of how he sees him: someone who is ethereal, almost untouchable with a very literal barrier (of water from the dreamscape), but he's willing to reach out and bring Kamui to his level. He absolutely views Subaru as a savior because that’s precisely what Subaru did for him. That’s a pretty complicated relationship, quite a bit more complicated than Keiichi is thinking, that’s for sure.

As for Subaru, he resumes his smoking as soon as Kamui is out of sight. I think Kamui suspected that’s why he wanted to stay behind because he looks contemplative when Subaru says he isn’t coming with. Even Keiichi seems surprised. Maybe that’s why he thought he had a chance with Kamui? (Also, Keiichi and Kamui’s interactions kind of deserve their own analysis because he’s Kamui’s one tie to normalcy and Keiichi has a profound attachment to Kamui the second they meet.)

Even so, Kamui's words about smoking being bad for him sticks with Subaru and you can tell he's conflicted about it. He keeps the cigarettes close, but there's less certainty about it than there was earlier in their conversation.

This part in particular is up for interpretation since there’s no dialogue, but to me it reads as Subaru being unable to let Seishirou go, but possibly wishing he were capable of it. He knows his wish will hurt people, and Subaru has never been content with that. This scene also makes me think of Subaru's one-shot chapter, where a woman says only a person with an ill heart can go around thinking only of one person. Subaru knows smoking is bad for him, but he's also already accepted he's "ill."

I’m a little unclear on how much time has passed, but the next time Kamui and Subaru see each other, it’s after Kamui is returning home from Keiichi’s house. He’s attacked by Fuuma and Subaru rushes in to save him.

Subaru legitimately came out of nowhere in this scene. Where was he before? How'd he get there so quickly? I know that the Dragons of Heaven can sense when a kekkai is raised, but Kamui can't raise one, so... I honestly can't remember, can the Dragons of Heaven just sense when Kamui is in danger? Because if not, I really don't know how Subaru knew to be exactly where he was needed.

Regardless, the battle between Fuuma and Kamui was going about as well as it usually does, which is to say absolutely terribly. Subaru gets a kekkai raised, and we actually get to see him use his onmyoji abilities in earnest against Nataku. You have no idea how much I wish we'd gotten to see infinitely more of this.

Unfortunately, Subaru ultimately loses once Fuuma joins the fray, but that’s because Fuuma is, frankly, an OP villain. I have never understood why the villains are so much more powerful than the good guys in this series. That’s just bad game design.

So, Subaru actually manages to capture Fuuma in a kekkai. I’m a little unclear on what the end goal of this was going to be. Annihilating him? Trapping him for good? But we don’t get to find out because Subaru gets lost in visions of Seishirou, the man he wants to kill him. To add insult to injury, Fuuma attacks him the same way Seishirou did when he was 16 and blinds his eye, saying it’s “his wish.” Ever notice Fuuma only seems to grant the really messed up wishes? He doesn’t have to grant all of these. He could focus on some nice ones for a change. Sheesh…

More importantly (as far as this review goes), Kamui is once again in the same situation Subaru was when he was 16. He is being protected by someone who loses their eye and he was powerless to stop it, just as Subaru was all those years ago. The main difference is that back then, Subaru was purposefully allowing someone to take their anger out on him and Seishirou got in the way. Kamui was forcibly restrained from the battle and had no choice but to witness events. It also shows the difference in their personality: Subaru isn't predisposed to fighting and is more than willing to be hurt if it helps another while Kamui is perfectly all right with fighting, he just doesn't want to hurt the other Kamui because it will hurt Fuuma.

There are some other differences as well. When Seishirou’s eye was gouged out he kind of just… walked into the ER? 8D Didn’t comfort Subaru, just casually stopped the woman from attacking him and walked away. So, Subaru’s distress levels were through the roof.

Kamui’s distress levels are also ridiculously high, but once again, Subaru is far more compassionate than Seishirou and I’m sure Subaru can see the parallels here. He knows exactly what Kamui’s going through, and he doesn’t want Kamui beating himself up the way he did to himself all those years ago. He actually stops the gurney in an effort to comfort him.

It definitely helps, but sometimes Subaru is a little too honest with Kamui. He tells him this was his “wish.” Needless to say, that doesn’t exactly ease Kamui’s mind because it raises a lot of questions about Subaru's mental state he probably hadn't even been considering before.

What follows is the most clear cut parallel we’ve ever had between Subaru and Kamui. Subaru’s despair at possibly losing Seishirou when he was 16 is nearly identical to Kamui’s despair at nearly losing Subaru in the present. CLAMP is not doing this accidentally.

This, almost more than anything else, makes me believe that Kamui has feelings for Subaru because there’s not really a reason to include this parallel otherwise. In Tokyo Babylon, after Seishirou lost his eye, Subaru realized he was in love with him. It wasn't right away, but that was the incident that sparked the whole thing.

After Subaru loses his eye, Kamui stays by his side as much as possible. Kamui is never shown to have a sudden revelation he’s in love, but this is where the differences between Subaru and Kamui really become important.

Back then, Subaru was terrified of Seishirou hating him after the eye incident, and I think a lot of that comes down to the fact that Seishirou was trying to win a bet. He proclaimed his love to Subaru all the time, but he was also mysterious and decidedly standoffish. Subaru had a difficult time reading him, therefore he couldn’t predict what Seishirou would think of him afterwards.

Subaru also has a fundamentally different personality to Kamui; he had no awareness of his own feelings toward Seishirou until his sister made him think about it and a stranger said it sounded like he really loved this individual.

Whether Kamui is worried Subaru will hate him is a little unclear, but we do know that one of Kamui’s biggest opinions of Subaru is that he’s very kind. We also know he admires him as the man that saved him and saw him at his worst already. Subaru is always honest and very open with Kamui; there isn’t any additional layer of confusion in this regard (there is confusion about other things, though). The only thing Kamui fears right now is Subaru dying in this situation. He also feels massive guilt for being incapable of helping him. Kamui is taking the blame for this.

Another difference is that Kamui doesn’t have anyone deliberately trying to get him to think about his feelings for Subaru, but I think Kamui is more predisposed to falling for people in general? Or at least more capable of realizing when he has. He loved Kotori and never seemed to be in denial about it from what I can tell. It wasn’t declared in a straightforward manner in the manga, but the series made it apparent enough through other things. Kotori is considered his canonical love interest for this very reason. And I think that’s more or less what we ought to expect in regards to Kamui’s feelings toward Subaru. There isn’t going to be a big revelation; it will simply be.

And part of that quiet revelation is how attached he continues to be to Subaru after this incident.

Subaru is overtly worried about Kamui, probably because he knows how worked up he was over Seishirou himself when it happened, but also because he thinks Kamui hasn't slept. "It's harder for him to bear the wounds to his heart than the wounds to his body." Subaru definitely understands Kamui's pain all too well and he knows that while this particular incident is his own fault, Kamui is the one who will shoulder the blame, just as he did all those years ago.

It's interesting that Kamui asks for permission to visit him again. It definitely implies that maybe he actually is a little worried Subaru doesn't want him around, that he's sending him away because he's upset with him.

Kamui looks quite distressed at first, but one look from Subaru and he knows Subaru isn’t upset with him; he's worried about him.

These two tend to be very quiet around each other as soon as other people are in the room, and both Sorata and Arashi are right there. As soon as they’re alone, they engage in far more intimate conversation. Yet, they appear to be pretty good at silent communication as well and a lot is exchanged in the above panels.

Even if Subaru has forgiven him, Kamui is still plagued by what happened (understandably). He compares it to his failure to save Kotori. Two important people to him are hurt/killed because he couldn’t fight against Fuuma. It’s a powerful dilemma and a powerful comparison.

Still, after a conversation with Sorata, a visit to Kotori's grave, and a conversation with Keiichi, Kamui has renewed hope. He can do something against Fuuma: he can protect the people he cares about. This renews Kamui's determination to learn how to create a kekkai, a plot point that is never actually finished... I honestly wonder if would have learned to create one? And what would have sparked that?

We get a little insight into what Subaru is thinking about events, though. It's about as depressing as you'd expect with the trajectory of this series.

Subaru has a selfish wish. He knows that wish will hurt everyone that knows him and now there are quite a few people who care about him, something he'd been trying to avoid.

Yuzuriha is entirely correct in her analysis here, though for more reasons than she might realize. She's essentially saying that both Kamui and Subaru look down on themselves and try to solve things on their own. It's why she makes them promise to call on her if they need help. But she's also correct in another way: they both have selfish wishes and they're hurting everyone around them for the sake of those wishes. Subaru is hurting people on an emotional level by pursuing death, while Kamui is inadvertently getting people injured and killed for the sake of rescuing Fuuma. The message is clear: if these two could let go of their one "wish" they could finally move on to other possibilities and would be far more effective at saving the world. It's a cruel irony that CLAMP made their kindest character and their hero the most emotionally compromised and the most inadvertently selfish. It's also a little unfortunate that kindness and hope seem to get trampled on so much in this series, but that's a whole separate issue.

Yuzuriha also leaves Subaru with a parting gift and, honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if she reminds him of his sister just a bit.

The cherry blossoms definitely bring Seishirou to mind as well as Subaru's wish for death, but it also makes me think of Hokuto as well, especially the rabbit plush. It just seems like something she would do. Regardless, Subaru still hasn't moved on.

Kamui engages in yet another battle with Fuuma, which actually goes worse than the last one. Sorata and Arashi aren't as timely as Subaru had been (Dragons of Heaven must simply be able to sense when Kamui is in trouble because they also were no where nearby. Alternatively, Hinoto is just telling them stuff). Fuuma is saying something about eating Kamui's heart. We could put this down as him being a general creep, but there's usually a double meaning with him. Perhaps one of Kamui's wishes is that he just didn't feel anything at all...?

All of this eventually brings us to our next Kamui and Subaru scene. This one has a very quiet, intimate vibe to it, probably on account of it not taking place in a hospital but what I think is Kamui's room?

Kamui has some pretty serious injuries this time around, and we learn that Subaru stayed with him the entire time, just as Kamui did for him at the hospital.

Actually, these two seem a lot closer than they did previously. Is it simply because of Subaru losing his eye? Did that open up a new level of compassion between one another? Was there more off-screen development? My guess is it’s mostly the former, but the latter is a distinct possibility with the way things have been going.

What is plain is that these two are always supporting each other in times of crisis. Not always physically, but emotionally. Subaru in particular is always there to counsel Kamui on whatever issue he wants to discuss while Kamui reminds Subaru that people actually do care about him and Kamui is one of those people.

“And yet, despite all that, I still can’t abandon Fuuma.”

Honestly, I think even Kamui is beginning to wonder if his wish is really worth it. He’s losing all the people he cares about in this pursuit. I genuinely think if Subaru had told him to rethink things here, he might have, because he trusts him and his wish has gotten him absolutely nothing so far.

Unfortunately, Subaru isn’t exactly in a great place to be telling people they need to rethink their life choices, so he doesn’t. Instead, he tries to be encouraging, which is both kind and misguided.

This is a level of emotional and physical intimacy that we just don’t see between any of the nonromantic relationships in this series. It’s actually more touch focused than a great deal of Arashi and Sorata’s interactions and those two actually have a very close emotional connection that develops into a sexual relationship later on in the series, so I have a hard time believing I’m supposed to read this scene as entirely platonic.

But what Subaru is saying is important, even if I think it’s a philosophy that manages to get both him and Kamui into trouble. “Happiness” is basically satisfaction or completion in this context. It’s not necessarily joy. Subaru is essentially telling Kamui that, yes, his wish may be selfish but it’s his. If it is the only thing that can satisfy him, he must pursue it.

Kamui makes no further comment on his own wish; he’s latched onto Subaru’s once more and is bringing Seishirou up yet again. Subaru appears surprised, perhaps because Kamui saw right through him or perhaps because Kamui’s interest in the subject has been so pointed, but he says “yes.”

I really do think Kamui was looking for something from Subaru here that he didn’t quite get. I genuinely believe he’s trying to get confirmation on whether his path is correct or not, but Subaru doesn’t really give him an answer. When that doesn't work, he tries to figure out if Seishirou is really the only thing that can bring Subaru satisfaction, which reveals this is yet another thing that's been on his mind.

That is not acceptance or understanding on Kamui’s face. That is something a little closer to sadness, disappointment, or possibly even anger. He is not pleased with this answer.

There are a lot of layers happening with this conversation and a lot of insinuations, but none of it is ever just laid out for us to see. What seems relatively straightforward to me is that Kamui wishes Subaru would let Seishirou go. He isn’t content with Seishirou being the answer to Subaru’s wish, but he also can’t bring himself to criticize it either. After all, that would be pretty hypocritical; Kamui can’t selfishly pursue his own wish while simultaneously asking Subaru to give up his own for Kamui, but I think there’s a part of Kamui that genuinely wants that to happen.

It also reveals that Kamui does have doubts about the path he's chosen. He never says it outright--he's always vocally determined to save Fuuma--but he's looking to Subaru for guidance on this issue. Not anyone else. Subaru.

So no, Kamui can't reveal that he's unsure about his wish; it's what bonded him and Subaru in the first place. Likewise, he can't ask Subaru to rethink his own wish. What really needs to happen for these two is for them both to give up their current wish to pursue … whatever this is. I’ve talked a lot about Kamui’s feelings for Subaru, but Subaru definitely holds affection for Kamui as well. There would be no reason to hold his hand that way otherwise. And there’s no way Subaru isn’t aware of the parallels; he is definitely occupying a similar role to Seishirou in Tokyo Babylon, that odd mix of mentor and potential love interest. The obvious difference being that Subaru isn’t a psychopathic killer.

Anyway, Sorata and Arashi once again interrupt their odd bonding moment and it’s incredible how swiftly the mood in the room changes. Subaru physically moves away from Kamui, stands at a more respectable distance, and Kamui turns his attention to everyone else. It definitely feels like they aren’t trying to advertise their emotional connection or their problems. Kamui becomes the leader and Subaru becomes another Dragon of Heaven.

Subaru eventually returns to his side when Kamui enters a dream state with Hinoto while the others are there, but he doesn’t say anything further. It’s interesting that Sorata has no issue with hugging Kamui or putting an arm around him when others are around, but Subaru does. Of course, Sorata is simply more demonstrative than Subaru on any given day, but it does feel like quite a stark contrast.

It looks like several days go by between that visit and their next one. Kamui is mostly recovered and heading back to school.

This is so subtle it’s very easy to miss–I did the first couple of times–but Kamui just finished buttoning up his shirt here. He is not inspecting his scars like I initially thought.

How long has Subaru been there? They’re pretty obviously in the middle of a conversation; he didn’t just arrive. It kind of suggests Kamui just… got dressed in front of him, which is definitely a shift. Their general attitudes towards each other are quite different from before as well. The opening panel above shows both of them as seeming more confident than before.

I’m not sure I believe anything untoward happened between them because that would be a pretty drastic shift in dynamics, but if there ever was a point in this series where something more physically intimate occurred (not necessarily anything sexual mind you), it's probably the unseen precursor to this scene. It's CLAMP, so... I guess what I'm saying is that I sometimes just don't know with them. XD

Regardless, all of this reveals, however subtly, a side to their relationship that doesn’t get a whole lot of focus. Namely, all that off-screen bonding I was talking about earlier.

Some of their comfort level is no doubt from the situation being less bleak in general of course. That usually helps.

And then there’s all of this:

Kamui's left arm is giving him a lot more trouble than his right. That explains why he was buttoning up his shirt with just the one previously. But he appears thoughtful, maybe a bit sad, as Subaru helps him with his tie. A lot of that has to do with him not knowing where Yuzuriha is–she could be in grave danger–but I also think some of it has to do with Subaru and Kamui’s feelings toward him. I think it’s safe to say things have entered “complicated” territory. They have a relationship that's incredibly close, but no matter how close Kamui gets to him, there's always a barrier there.

There's also the fact that Kamui always feels guilty when he's incapable of something, so even something as simple as needing help with his tie could be causing him some distress.

So much of what goes on between these two is unspoken. Subaru helping him with his tie is something that doesn’t have to be romantic, but it is a frequently used trope used to demonstrate trust and care, usually between two people who are already together.

If Seishirou and Subaru’s relationship reached it’s culmination after Seishirou lost an eye, I think it’s safe to say that Subaru and Kamui’s is following a similar trajectory, only Subaru didn’t immediately turn on Kamui. Instead, they have time to explore things in a way Subaru never did with Seishirou, whatever that may mean.

Subaru moves things into safer waters from Yuzuriha’s disappearance to Keiichi. He says he will be glad to see Kamui back in school and that he asked Subaru every day if he was all right.

Now, I mentioned earlier that Keiichi definitely thought Subaru and Kamui had something going on and felt he might be stealing Kamui away, but what does Subaru think of Keiichi?

I'd say "curious" but supportive and completely unconcerned about any competition. Honestly, Subaru doesn't strike me as the jealous type, so even if there is something between him and Kamui, I don't think he'd stop Kamui from pursuing something with anyone else. Subaru wouldn't consider himself a great choice; he thinks he's selfish after all.

This is the last normal moment Kamui and Subaru have before Subaru's final confrontation with Seishirou.

I feel relatively safe in the assumption that Subaru was going to say "like you." This is before he even becomes the Sakurazukamori, but he now considers himself selfish and he can't move on from his past whatsoever. He's also lost some of the empathy he had when he was younger; he's definitely kind, but he isn't willing to give everything up for others. He's arguably taken on Seishirou's role with Kamui as well, which I'm sure he has mixed feelings about. And ultimately, he and Seishirou share the same wish: to be killed by the person they love. So, yes, Subaru is definitely different from how he used to be.

It's after Seishirou dies that Subaru really snaps in the series. He was struggling to get by for the majority of it, but this really does it. It’s notable that even now, Kamui restrains himself.

Kamui always holds himself back when it comes to matters involving both Subaru and Seishirou. He never tells Subaru what he thinks of his wish and he doesn’t know how to help him. I think a lot of his resistance to actively reaching out to Subaru on this matter, both physically and emotionally, is out of a misguided sense of respect for him. Subaru knows what he wants and did a great deal for Kamui; Kamui tries to return the favor by giving him distance, but I think distance was the wrong thing to give Subaru. He needs to be dragged into the now and he needs to be reminded that people care. That's a lot to take on though, so I can't blame Kamui for not knowing what to do, especially when he's looking to Subaru for guidance. He doesn't feel like he can take on that role.

Their final parting is tough to watch.

I think this time, Kamui actually is worried Subaru might hate him, because for the first time he’s actually “disrespected” Subaru’s wish. He didn’t let him die with Seishirou when the bridge collapsed. He saved him and that goes against everything Subaru has wanted for the last nine years.

But once again, Subaru misunderstands and I think there’s a part of Subaru that simply can’t accept that Kamui cares for him as a person. He’s stopped caring about himself, so he doesn’t connect the very obvious dots in front of him.

Subaru: You don’t need to worry about me. I’m not going to fall apart.

It could be this is just how Subaru deflects. Rather than discuss what’s really bothering him, he tries to treat Kamui like a leader who is talking to his subject, but that simply isn’t the relationship they ever had, least of all now.

Once again, Kamui gets to the heart of the matter; Subaru is thinking of Seishirou. Everything he's done is for Seishirou, and it's now very apparent Kamui simply can't accept that. He's sorry for it, he knows that if he really wanted to "respect" Subaru he would have let him die, but he couldn't do it.

Even now, Subaru is still trying to explain things to Kamui and still trying to comfort him to a limited degree; Subaru’s not exactly at his best right now, though and it's all pretty dejected. Despite having his wish denied, he doesn't blame Kamui. As he points out a little bit later, some wishes collide. He doesn't hold it against Kamui, though.

Kamui brings up the cigarettes again and this implies the whole thing is still bugging him and that he simply doesn’t understand Subaru’s motivations.

It’s interesting that our only previous glimpse into how Kamui feels about Subaru showed Subaru as being above him, yet reaching out to bring him closer. Here, Kamui literally sits on his knees before him so that Subaru is hovering over him, almost like a king with his subject, and Subaru is metaphorically reaching out to Kamui in an effort to explain himself so that Kamui might understand him.

Subaru explains everything, and essentially tells him he will never understand Seishirou now, never know what he really thought.

I think it’s safe to say that Kamui is feeling similarly about Subaru at the moment--he doesn't feel like he understands him nor does he understand what he's thinking--and once again Subaru is taking Seishirou’s role in a very roundabout way, albeit in a kinder fashion. But there's no doubt that Kamui is giving Subaru power here. Everything about their posture and conversation indicates that. While Subaru sometimes tries to treat Kamui like a leader either as a way of deflecting or because he actually believes that's the right way to handle things, we see here that Kamui absolutely views Subaru as the person with the wisdom and authority to determine things. Maybe not about the fate of the world, that's Kamui's duty, but as far as giving directions? As far as getting a say in what happens next? Absolutely.

And once again, Kamui is looking for something from Subaru he can’t give: he’s asking if what he’s pursuing is “right” and if he should change. Subaru is being given the power to change Kamui’s course and I don’t think he even realizes it.

While looking at their progression, I really think some of Kamui’s steadfast determination to save Fuuma is partially because of how Subaru keeps affirming this belief for him. There were at least two big moments where Subaru could have nudged him in a different direction, but he didn’t take it. Instead, he tries to be encouraging, although this time it’s definitely more fatalistic. Subaru doesn't understand the influence he has over Kamui and that is one of their biggest miscommunications in the series.

Even as lost as Subaru is currently, he still cares about Kamui. He wants him to focus on his own desires, not on him, and he wants him to take care of himself. The problem is that he’s completely missing the fact that Kamui relies on him, cares about him, and would do a lot better if Subaru stayed in some capacity. Instead, he disappears for a month.

Needless to say, Subaru is very much on his mind throughout his absence and Kamui still can't make a kekkai. He thinks about how everyone has something they want to protect, and that's why they can make one. His thoughts lead him right back to Subaru.

This is the person he's thinking about the most while he's visiting Kotori. This is the person he wants to return. And we actually get to see what it is Kamui actually wants for a change:

I don't know if this is the wish Kamui hasn't realized but it's definitely a wish: he wants Subaru to come back. He wants to go out and look for him. He wants Subaru to be capable of caring for someone other than the Sakurazukamori. The implication is that he wants to be important enough to Subaru for him to come back.

Just as Subaru wanted to be important enough to Seishirou for him to acknowledge him, so too does Kamui wish he were important enough for Subaru to do the same.

Kamui continues with "The people I most wanted to protect were Kotori and Fuuma. But Kotori is gone. And now all I want is to get Fuuma back. But... I still can't create a kekkai."

Fuuma is watching this moment through the dreamscape and has this input:

So, protecting Fuuma isn’t his real wish. What is? The only other thing he was thinking about was Subaru, but even I hesitate to say that’s the ultimate wish. I definitely think it's an important, unrealized wish all the same, however. As for Kamui's real wish, I’ve been assuming it was he'd chosen a different side so Fuuma could be spared or possibly that he had died instead of Kotori. CLAMP makes it hard to say for sure.

Anyhow, we finally see where Subaru’s been hiding out for a month plus: the Sakurazukamori’s house. I’m not entirely sure how he found it, but there it is.

Also, Seishirou’s final wish is about as messed up as you’d expect.

Wow, we get weird eye stuff and a dose of stalker possessiveness. 8D CLAMP outdid themselves. I can't even...

And as if that wasn't enough, we get this:

D-do I even want to know what that means? The context of this is incredibly bizarre. He’s talking about how Seishirou was upset another man hurt Subaru. The only person that’s been hurting Kamui is him.

Am I supposed to assume Fuuma wants to prevent anyone else from leaving any kind of mark on Kamui? Is that supposed to be a reference to an actual person? The only person I could think of is Subaru as far as who's been interacting with him, and I’m not actually sure that makes sense. 8D Is he talking about the original Fuuma? He’s jealous of himself? Or possibly even Kotori? Or am I supposed to assume Fuuma just wants to mark Kamui as his with another freaky eye exchange? CLAMP… Why…

Anyway, Subaru takes the eye because he’s been making a series of bad decisions and he isn’t about to let up now.

The next time we see Subaru, he has decided to do nothing, which is basically what he’d decided to do beforehand, only now he has Seishirou’s eye and is willing to watch events unfold. We see that there’s a little tension between him and Fuuma, which is… hardly surprising all things considered.

It’s interesting that Fuuma says Seishirou has been very selfish when it comes to Subaru. That would be pretty obvious to the audience, but Subaru is surprised by this assessment. Seishirou is preventing Subaru from achieving his “wish,” i.e. death and he’s also preventing him from connecting with other people. That’s the height of selfishness.

It is strange hearing this from Fuuma when he is being equally awful, however, which is probably why Subaru points out that wishes are something only Fuuma knows to begin with in what can only be described as an annoyed fashion.

We know Subaru has been on Kamui’s mind (a lot) and it looks like Kamui has been on Subaru’s as well.

Subaru does care about Kamui is the thing, which is why it's doubly strange seeing him as a Dragon of Earth. He doesn't want Kamui hurt, but he claims he's not going to be involved. Can that really be the case if he genuinely cares about someone on the opposite side?

Interestingly, he avoids the subject. He's always been private when it comes to Kamui and it looks like that isn't about to change here, especially when he's talking to the man who has tormented him so much.

The next time Kamui sees Subaru is in the midst of battle with Fuuma and Kamui definitely feels betrayed.

Subaru's presence here is a little strange and I think the only reason he's shown up at all is because he cares about Kamui, just like Fuuma said. He's not showing it in the best way, but...

At long last, Subaru tells Kamui what he needed to hear ages ago and using the opportunity he's been given many times, but never used. Kamui needs to rethink some things and saving Fuuma isn’t what he really wants.

And the thing is, Kamui listens. The final chapter ends with Kamui remembering Karen’s words and finally trying to piece together what might actually be going on and it’s all because Subaru finally stepped in and offered an actual opinion. That's the level of influence Subaru has over Kamui and I'm still not sure Subaru has figured that out.

So, how would things have progressed with Subaru and Kamui after all this? Obviously, there’s no way to say for sure. If CLAMP wanted to draw the final parallel between the Subaru/Seishirou relationship and the Subaru/Kamui relationship, then it’s quite possible Subaru will die at Kamui’s hands. Another possible parallel is that one of them realizes they love the other, but only when it's too late. But the thing is, while there are parallels between these relationships, their differences are far more profound and these two never had the kind of relationship where one would ever want to kill the other.

Even with Subaru’s betrayal, I doubt Kamui wants to see harm come to him; he’s still looking to him for guidance and support. He no doubt wants Subaru to come back. It's what he's been wanting ever since he left.

Rather than Kamui killing Subaru, it’s much more likely Subaru would sacrifice himself for Kamui, possibly as his final wish. It’s also possible Subaru decides to rejoin the Dragons of Heaven because there really isn’t any reason he has to be with the Dragons of Earth? He’s not a fan of Fuuma, he has no attachment to the people there. He’s just there for the sake of Seishirou’s memory. Undoubtedly there would be some conversation(s) between Subaru and Kamui even with them being on opposite sides. This wasn't supposed to be the final battle; Kamui doesn't die here. For all we know, that sword Fuuma's been holding up for years never strikes Kamui; it could hit someone that flings themselves in front of Kamui or it could be blocked or any number of things. But it isn't the end.

Furthermore, there's still the matter of Kamui learning to make a kekkai. It would be very strange if CLAMP never gave him a reason to create one. The issue Kamui is having is that the people he wanted to protect in the world are already gone. He needs some other reason or person to create a kekkai. This means he needs to realize an attachment to a person he didn't realize he had. I'm just saying, Subaru is a good choice for that.

And like Kamui, I have to wonder if there’s anything out there Subaru would be willing to protect. The likeliest candidate is Kamui himself.

Now, I would personally like a much happier ending to this manga than I think we were likely to get, but whatever the ending, I don’t think CLAMP was going to drop the exploration they had going of Kamui and Subaru’s relationship. It didn’t dominate the series, but it also got a lot more focus than they needed to give it. It was important and it was unique and I think their bond could have continued to grow if the world had been a little kinder to them and if they’d both been willing to move on a little sooner.

And that’s all for now. This turned out to be very long. I will now proceed to content myself with writing more fanfic. 8D

[recordmcqueen]

👉👈 Every ship ask for the boboiboy fandom? please? thank you //sad cape whoosh

aha now we’re talkin

1. What was your first OTP? boifang- my sister had only about a thousand screenshots of them before she finally managed to drag me in so its not like i had a choice--

2. What is your current OTP? answered this already

3. Do you have any OT3/OT+ ships? What are your favorites? hmm the only ones i have rn are goboifang and manramen x kaizo x pirate soldier guy. oh but like lowkey ayu yu x kiki ta x ejo jo dont question me okay-

4. What is/are your favorite trope(s)? idk if its a trope but like i want some brotp in my otp yknow and monsta does that right i just hhh bless. but also like the whole yin-yang thing going on with fang and bbb is just ahhh im weak

5. What is/are your least favorite trope(s)? hmmm in the fandom its mostly the hetshipping like i have no hate on any ships but a lot of times it does feel like theyre shipping for the sake of straight than dynamic which is really. unfortunate.

6. Do you have a certain kind of ship you’re more attracted to? bros being homies okay im so weak for the idiot memelords who all share one singular braincell its wonderful.

7. Are most of your ships “pure” or “problematic”? uhh i think as far as this fandom goes none of my ships are actively being bashed on and theyve all got pretty wholesome dynamics sooo nah? but then like i go and angst them all up so idk if that makes them problematic lol--

8. Who is the most shippable person you can think of? ...fang. probably because i think about him the most and also cause he got one of the best character development arcs and that just gives him a really solid dynamic with other characters //now im just making excuses hes my favorite okay

9. Are there any fandoms you don’t have any ships for? kind of? im kinda neutral on ships like i dont Need them (esp not in canon i actually prefer canon to be shipless bLESS MONSTA) and i don’t bash on any for the most part i can See all ships. but i dont necessarily actively Ship ships all the time yknow? so ig the answer is no...

10. Do characters have to have canon interactions for you to ship them? lmao nope (see kiki ta x ayu yu and probs a dozen other ships that dont come to mind at the moment)

11. What makes a great ship in your own opinion? uhhh dynamic??

12. What drives you away from a ship? lack of dynamic-- shipping for aesthetic is nice but i just appreciate the good art without really connecting to the ship itself yknow

13. Is there anything you ship but refuse to interact with the community for? mm yes. idk i feel like the fanbase is polarized between “soft pure bean with no or few ships” and “thirsty simps 18+ only” and both categories scare me too much to chat ships with lol

14. Has a fanbase ever made you ship or not ship something? Why? yES but not the bbb fanbase thankfully cantsaythesameforthelastfandomuhm

15. Do you like/participate in ship wars? Why or why not? already answered this one

16. Are there any ships you just can’t/don’t understand? What are they? boya. also saifang, come to think of it (the latter is significantly less popular). in both cases i consider them as a familial bond and cant really see them any other way? like i see bbb and yaya as mlm wlw solidarity and sai as an older brother to fang more than anything else so yknow hshsh

17. Are there any popular ships that you just don’t like? What are they? i mean the collective fandom otp is boicest so yknow. not my jam uwu

18. What is your favorite unpopular ship? bruh my otp is unpopular ToT

19. Do you prefer fluff, angst, or smut for your ships? angstangstangst *cough* ill take a nice order of fluff please and thank you kindly uwu

20. Do you prefer bigger fanbases or smaller ones? big fanbase have more content and its easier to find ppl to talk about rarepairs with. small fandom already have so few people its near impossible to find anyone to talk about your toiny ship with and even harder to find fellow fans irl. big fandoms have more potential toxicity tho--

21. Have you ever received hate for a ship you liked? lmao yeah but not for this fandom //probs cause i rarely talk about bbb ships in public anyway lol

22. Do you have any ships that you ship, but would never want to see as canon? all of them. i praise monsta every day for making their content 100% gen and i would never want it any other way bLESS

23. Have you ever had a ship become canon, but you didn’t like how it was portrayed? not in bbb for obvious reasons lol but in another fandom i Guess? idk how canon is “canon”

24. What is your favorite canon ship? *sweats intensely* captain kaizo’s dragonfly ship looks badass wish they kept it instead of the new round thingy he has that looks like it could impale someone- okay but papa zola and mama zila are heckin wholesome i love them and im so glad pipi has good loving parents

25. What are your favorite ships from a dead fandom? i dont think any of my current fandoms are Dead per se..

26. What are your favorite shipping scenes? “the captain praised me, what of it?” “open the door to my heart!” but also mONSTA WHY WOULD YOU DELETE BBB INVITING FANG TO STAY OVER AT HIS HOUSE FROM BBBM2 OTL //at least it meant we got it released internationally early so i could enjoy that much from canada

27. What are your views on reader x canon ships? already answered

28. What is your best shipping advice? whats with all the ship hatin ToT even if yall heathens cant understand multishipping, surely “mind your own damn business” and “live and let live” are easy enough pills to swallow??

29. Do you like OCs (Original Characters)? already answered

30. What are some of your favorite shipping blogs? are there bbb shipping blogs? i know theres the ramenzo one.. i dont think boifang has any active ones and my other ships are too rare to be considered lol yeah im pretty sure the only fandom shipping blogs (if any) would be boicest rip

[orionsangel86]

About Shipping

I was thinking this morning about why I so avidly "ship" Destiel. Why it means so much to me and why it's main texting is something I focus on even with the persistent hate and nastiness from people who are against it.

In our culture there have always been shippers. People have been shipping characters since long before I was born and probably will be long after I'm gone. Slash shipping is a huge part of that. People will generally ship anyone if they think the two characters have good enough chemistry.

The thing is, I DON'T ship. I never have. Not in the way that shippers are known for. I certainly don't multiship. That's not to say that those who do ship characters because "they are hot" or "they have chemistry" are wrong. They arent. Ship and let ship and all that. It's just not for me. I can't watch a show and just pick two characters or especially two characters who are supposed to be best friends and force my mind to see them in a romantic or sexual way.

I could never ship Spock/Kirk or Johnlock for instance. Even with the queer coding I won't see it unless I see it as part of a love story playing out in the text. Because queer coding does not make a love story.

This is the big difference that I find when I talk to other destiel "shippers" like myself. I know many people like me who have never been part of "shipping" culture, who've never been in fandom or read fanfiction before Destiel.

Destiel is different. I'm not saying it's better than those other ships, just that it's different. It doesn't work the same way.

Like how when we are young we consume fairy tales until they are ingrained in our subconscious to the extent that generally we can recognise an intended romantic pairing within the first 5 minutes of the story. No one is gonna watch the Princess Bride for the first time and not inherently KNOW that Princess Buttercup and Wesley are meant to be, even when he is "mostly dead".

I didn't "ship" Buffy and Spike. Their story resonated with me in the same frequency as the fairy tales of my youth. It was as clear as can be after a certain point in the show that their story was a romantic one. (Sorry Bangel shippers).

It's easier with het pairings. Most people are conditioned to see romance first between characters of different genders. It's why When Harry Met Sally asked that infuriating and misguided question "can men and women ever JUST be friends?" It's why after watching the first few minutes of the first episode of Big Bang Theory I rolled my eyes and turned to my mum and said "well obviously Leonard's gonna end up with Penny". But in that case I didn't ship them, because whilst I recognised the intended love story, I tend to rebel against it when it's so obvious it's boring. (Big Bang Theory then went on to be the most problematic piece if bullshit still airing on TV INCLUDING Supernatural.)

So I don't ship characters. I DO recognise romantic tropes and love stories being built into a piece of media. Destiel pulled me in not because these two guys are hot, not because the actors have good chemistry, and even because they are heavily queer coded. None of those things alone indicate a love story. Destiel pulled me in because it so clearly WAS a love story.

Baring in mind before Destiel I had never even considered a queer ship. I was stubbornly heteronormative and had no fandom interaction. I know many other Destiel shippers who say the same thing.

When I look at season 4 DeanCas now for instance, I can see the sexual tension clearly. It's painfully obvious once you are tuned in. I remember picking up on it and wondering if Cas was gay, but brushed it off pretty quickly. In seasons 5 and 6 I picked up on the gay jokes, the standard homoerotic flirtations which SPN had already been doing much to my own discomfort with Sam and Dean since season 1. So I ignored it.

6x20 was the first time something changed. The first time it was written with a slight romantic lense. It made me sit up and pay attention and by that point I was convinced that Cas's love for Dean was more than platonic but still my heteronormativity denied me from really considering it.

(As an aside, I recognised Dean's bisexuality quite early on but didn't think about it too much. For me it was just a thing that was unspoken but pretty much fact.)

From season 8 onwards I sat up and paid attention. After watching 8 seasons worth of this show it had chipped away at my heteronormativity until it was practically non existent. I can't remember exactly when I had that lightbulb moment, but it was during season 8 when I said "shit this is actually a love story".

After that, yes I saw it, i bought into it, and i adamantly supported it. It still took me another few months and binge watching through to the end of season 9 before I even thought about getting online. This was in the summer between s9 and s10 and for the first time ever I was watching a queer love story play out on front of me. For the first time in a long time I was watching a love story that wasn't a boring repeat of every other dumb het love story going. I was captivated.

I don't "ship" and I'm not just "another shipper". There is a reason a huge portion of Destiel fandom sees the canon potential and calls out for this to happen in the show. There is a reason why practically every day new people fall down the Destiel rabbit hole and find us online, especially when the majority of those people are like me in that they have never "shipped" or been in fandom before. Even the ones that have, the ones that have interacted with fandom for years and had many other ships and slash ships in their lifetimes have admitted to me that Destiel is different.

Destiel isn't like other ships, because it's not a "ship" as such. It's a canon slow burn love story being played mainly in subtext but with many textual nods and implications. You can't compare it to any other non canon fandom ships of the day. The only ones that come close are canon love stories.

My point to this long rambly post is to stress that those claiming that Destiel is nothing more than a fetish ship, or a fanon based delusion with no canon material to back it up, those who dismiss Destiel as just another fanon slash ship, and claim that we are entitled for daring to wish it to be brought to main text. Those people are wrong. They are wrong because all we, as destiel supporters need to do to see proof of how wrong they are, is to look at ourselves and ask the question WHY do I "ship" it?

You "ship" it because it's there in the show and you are recognising the love story being told. If you don't see it that way, but still ship it, fine. Though I guarantee you are in the minority.

We have been conditioned since children to recognise love stories when presented to us. Destiel is a love story that you are noticing. That is all. That is why it isn't just another slash ship reliant solely on attractive actors, actor chemistry and a touch of homoerotic tension. It's so much more than that, and when people reduce it to that and claim it's no different to Johnlock, to Spirk, to Sterek or one of the many other fanon slash ships out there it makes my blood boil.

I'm not a shipper, I've never been interested in shipping. But I do know a love story when I see one and nothing anyone could say would change my mind about that.

[ncumenia-archived]

📱MOBILE-FRIENDLY RULES📱

OTHER LINKS:

lore

bio

headcanons

exclusive ship list

Since English is not my mother language, I apologize in advance if there are some grammatical errors or I use wrong words to describe an action. If something is not clear to you, just let me know, I’ll fix it as soon as I can.

Roleplay Rules:

TAG DUMP HERE!; (NSFW too)

Mun&Muse are both 21+. This blog is selective, 18+ exclusive, canon divergent, duplicates crossover, AU, fandomless, etc… friendly!  

Besides the obvious fact I won't rp smut or ship with minor muns/muses whatsoever, do not follow me if you're underage. This because I feel uncomfortable interacting with minor muns due to the huge age gap that might be between us. (Mun is currently 25 as I write this) Please, don't take it too personally, it's just for my own comfort. Furthermore, if your rules and age (mun is 18+, mun is 23, mun is of age and so on...) are not present on your blog I won’t rp with you at all. Lying about your age will result into a permablock and reported. The same applies if you're underage or your age is not stated and you dare to interact in any kind of NSFW way with me (This also includes liking/commenting my nsfw posts or sending me nsfw asks)

I refuse to ship/interact with: aged up muses (Nunu, Annie, Zoe etc…) and only smut-oriented blogs since they both make me uncomfortable. So, please, if you’re one of these blogs do not follow me.

No godmodding. If our muses are fighting, I’d like to discuss first with the other mun, in order to avoid it as much as possible;

I don’t like “follow for following me back, and if you don’t follow me I’ll unfollow you“ philosophy because I find this kinda disrespectful. I’m also available to interact with you even if we’re not mutuals! Usually, the reasons why I unfollow you are these: spamming too much without using a proper tag, talking shit about other people here on tumblr, spreading useless drama or rumors, posting stuff that makes me uncomfortable or if I somehow assume you’re not interested to interact with me.DMS are always open for plotting!

Currently available verses: Canon, Odyssey, Modern/Academy, Bloodmoon, Deity Please, before interacting with my muse in one of these verses make sure to read the lore and, if something is not clear to you, dm me anytime!;

I’ll try to match length more or less, so don’t worry about that. And please, TAKE YOUR TIME to reply. I have a life too, so don’t worry I’m not the one who runs after others! I tend to easily forget threads, so if I didn’t reply to our thread for like a couple of days dm me!;

I do believe in reblog karma, it’s your choice to send me a meme, but please reblog it from the source and not from me if you don’t want to send me one. If you reblog a meme from me without sending me one for more than once, I’ll block you. I’m sorry about this rule, but after some time this becomes quite annoying;

Any kind of hate toward a nationality/gender/sexual orientation and so on will result in a report and permablock. I believe everyone should respect a person, regardless of their gender/ethnicity/sexual orientation. If you don’t, you’ll get permablocked. Period. The same goes for every kind of insult or anon hate toward me, a ship or a friend: not only you’ll be ignored, but, if it is necessary, I’ll report and permablock you.

This blog is against any kind of fake/unfounded rumors and drama. I'll only reblog callouts that provide evidence about the problematic individual, and mostly about extremely serious topics (like minor hunters, abusers or if someone who is seriously in danger) I'm not afraid to callout people if they have a problematic/gross behavior or if they support/justify problematic/disturbing/traumatic topics.

I won’t rp and tolerate extremely disturbing topics like incest, rape (non-con/dub-con as well), pedophilia, child/animal abuse, and similar. The same goes for every kind of ship where these themes are involved. Mentioning these topics during a thread is okay (For example if you’re talking about your muse’s past), but I’d rather talk with the mun first so we can plot things properly.

Any jokes about child death, rape, racism, disability, sexism and so on are not allowed here. If I see one of them, I may go to your dms and telling you that’s not okay writing these things because they’re harmful, and to stop with that stuff. If you’ll ignore/insult/make fun of me you’ll be permablocked. [Added: 09/07/2019]

This blog may contain triggers such as blood, angst, smoke, drugs, gore, mental health etc. I’ll tag everything and I’ll use “read more”. (I’ll tag my triggers using, for example, “tw: blood” without air quotes) Before rping this stuff with you, I’ll always ask you if you’re okay with it, so do please tell me if you have any triggers or I should tag something specific in my blog! For example, my muse, when she’s overwhelmed by certain feelings or recalls what happened to her kin, she bleeds from her mouth and sternal scar. Please, if this makes you feel uncomfortable don’t be afraid to tell me it; Regarding sexual content, it will also be present, especially during Sinday, but I will always tag everything accordingly and put everything under read more.

Please, tag these two topics: needles and stepping on people. I feel extremely uncomfortable regarding the latter because it's heavily connected with animal abuse, and it makes me feel so sick I start to panic. I only ask you to tag these two topics.

I’m a human being, and sometimes I make mistakes too. If I made something that offended you/made you feel uncomfortable, PLEASE LET ME KNOW. I want to learn from my mistakes.

Shipping rules:

Even if I’m more than aware of the fact an 18+ mun is legally an adult, I realized I feel more comfortable shipping with both muns/muses who are 20+, especially in the case there will be some nsfw. That’s my personal preference, and this is NOT negotiable and it will NEVER be.[added 06/05/2019]

If you don’t want to keep our ship going on, that’s TOTALLY OKAY. I will NEVER get mad at you, neither asking you the motivation. If you don’t feel comfortable anymore, that’s okay and I respect your decision!

This blog is multiship exclusive, that means I'll only ship with one muse/au of that muse. Furthermore, I'll be highly selective with whom I ship with, and I mostly prioritize people I've been friends with for a long time. [EXCLUSIVE SHIP LIST]

I state in advance I don’t ship my muse with Diana, since she sees her as a mother-like figure. So… This basically would be incest, and I feel very uncomfortable with it. Furthermore, I won’t ship with Taric, Leona, Aurelion, Soraka, Zoe (But this is almost needless to say since she’s a minor, but prevention is always better than the cure), and yordles.

Even if I’m extremely fine with a platonic/non-sexual relationship, I’m also okay with some smut and that may occur with a serious plot, and ONLY if I feel comfortable and I trust my rp partner enough. Unfortunately, I don’t feel very comfortable rping it on Tumblr, and I’d rather rp it on Discord. [Please check the smut rules here] DON’T FORCE IT WITH ME, otherwise the ship will be deleted and probably I’ll block you too.

My muse is a revenant (I’m talking about her canon verse. In Odyssey! and Modern! she’s a living being) and NO, shipping with her is NOT necrophilia (She’s NOT a lifeless, nonsentient, smelly and rotten body who cannot give consent. She has revived thanks to Targon/Moon’s magic, and she’s ABLE to consent and she doesn’t smell bad, she’s not rotting and so on). I’m writing this because I’m kinda sick of this subject because “Shipping with Ernye/Pyke/Thresh/Kalista/Yone is necrophilia1111!!1!!”, and I’m more than sure these people are the first who fall in love with a vampire. If I receive any anon asks about this stuff in which there’s written I cannot ship her with anyone or other offensive things toward me or my muse (both ic and ooc), I’ll ignore and permablock them. No matter who’s the person who sent this. Again: I’m sick and tired of this stuff because basically there’s no problem in shipping with a psycho who can basically kill/abuse you any moment, meanwhile, GOD FORBID a revenant/vampire and stuff like that. So, better safe than sorry. If this bothers you so much you can unfollow me.

Respect my right to say “NO” if I don’t want to ship with your muse. So, don’t force it or I’ll block you.;

About the Mun:

You can call me Silkie, and I’m 25 years old;

Discord for mutuals only;

Pronouns: she/her (They/Them is also fine, if you feel more comfortable with it, no worries);

Chickens, cats, chinchillas, and Castlevania addicted;

I consider myself as a friendly person, so if you wanna know me or rp with me just send me a message! I suffer from diagnosed GAD and depression, so I really need time to open up to people and my activity may be sporadic because of this. And, please: if I make/say something that makes you feel uncomfortable TELL ME ANYTIME since I never mean to hurt anyone here through my words or acts;

Remember Muse ≠ Mun. Ernye’s actions don’t reflect my personality, or what I think about you;

Please DON’T FLIRT WITH ME, it makes me extremely anxious and uncomfortable due to many awful experiences I had in the past, and also because rp is a hobby and I want to have fun, and I’m not looking for a romantic partner. If you ignore my warnings I’ll permablock you. And yes, this also applies to every NSFW question about me. If you dare to do so you’ll get immediately reported, permablocked and the whole chatlog saved. I will also NOT tolerate any kind of NSFW anon ask about me.

The cringy art you see on my profile is made by me unless stated otherwise. Constructive criticism and bits of advice are more than welcome and encouraged ♥

[ If you have read my rules send me “Has the killing moon come for them?” That’s optional, of course, you don’t have to send it to me!]

[maitretmaitresse]

SHIPPING INFO !! answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog. repost ! do not reblog.

what is your otp for your character?:  Truthfully, I’m very fond of the bastards being married to each other. I’m biased, obviously. And then there’s the fact that they’re formed from that mold of characters which are the logical swap of each other in the percieved gender role of their time period - Pierre being a blackguard, Bea being a coquettish doxy. But they always have such good chemistry, no matter what version, and I don’t write about it much, but they’re very much in love with each other. Goddamnit Marie write that meta already

what are you willing to write when it comes to shipping?: I do write smut, but I’m completely understanding of those who don’t want to do it - no matter the reason! I’m happy to do fades-to-black, skipovers, or what-have you. I do personally think that writing smut - in my experience - can expand the character, explain some characteristics further, and can also be used comedically. That is, after all, 60 percent of the reason for this blog’s existence. 

how large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable?:  -sideyes Hugo for a few minutes before writing- It depends on how old they are when they meet. I’m not super comfortable with an 18 year old dating a 25 year old, but having a 30 year old date a 37 year old doesn’t bother me in the slgihtest. I guess the highest it could go for me reasonably is 15 years, but that’s assuming that both parties are over 35 when they started dating, and didn’t meet prior to five years before that and these are a lot of stipulations and I’m going to stop talking now.

are you selective when shipping?: Pretty much as selective as I am when deciding who to write with at all. Prefers paragraph style, compatable formatting, mutual recognition of themes and fandoms. The thing about shipping with the raccoons is that I’m actually super open to it because they’re both very open to short-term relationships. Beatrice’s continually ready to ruin someone’s life, and young Pierre falls in love absurdly easily. 

how far do steamy moments have to go before they are considered ns.fw?: I actually cut it at shirts off regardless of gender. Usually by that point they’re engaging in enough making out that I’ll tag it just in case. I won’t put it under a read-more until all clothing is off, though, so I hope that informs you somewhat.

who are the characters you ship your character with?: Beatrice/Lord Byron I mean wat. I ship them with each other, clearly. Canonically, I can’t really ship them with anyone else. I imagine Beatrice flirts with the Patron-Minette but it’s mostly to piss them off. That said, I am completely open to discussion

does one have to ask to ship with you?: Nah, not really. Just throw it in, and we can plot from there if we need to!

how often do you like to ship?: On this blog, not as much as I’d like - I get a lot more action with Iracebeth and Carlotta for what I would hope are obvious reasons. That said, I still love it, and I want as many ships thrown at me as you can manage

are you ship obsessed or ship more - or - less?: Probably less. Shipping is never an end goal - exploring the character is. But I do very much enjoy the practice

are you multiship?: Always

what is your favourite ship in your current fandom?: -awkward cough- Yeah still the Thenardiers. I can’t help it, they’ve been together the longest, they’re my favorite dynamic - two horrible people getting it on. They actually do respect each other, in so much as they respect anybody. They coparent (badly), they share financial information. They clearly trust each other to hell and back.  Also, if we go by movie canon (which most people don’t including myself whoops) they are the only couple to say “I love you” and “I love you too.”. Goddamnit Marie write this meta.

finally, how does one ship with you?: Carrier pidgeon exclusively. I kid. Start flirting with ‘em, send me a message, send me a flirty ask meme, do whatever you want! I’m always up for startin’ something

TAGGED BY: @bountyman the sweetheart <3 TAGGING: @pontificalandwarlike @transparentbutimpenetrable @bonhcmme @signed-r  And whoever the hell wants to

[backtothestart02]

This is a spallen defense post. (from a westallen shipper)

WARNING: if you hate/strongly dislike Patty or spallen, WALK AWAY NOW. If you hate/strongly dislike Iris/westallen, also leave. This post is not for you. It's just some venting I needed to do, b/c my emotions have been building lately & they need to be released. ... It's that time of year again. Time to defend my fav temporary ship... "That's why he acted so disinterested in her while they were dating." -quote from recent WA vid I watched. -OMG. I am sick and tired of Patty just being lumped in as another girl who didn't measure up to Iris in all these posts and vids I've been seeing. I mean, yes, Barry wasn't in love with her. And yeah, Iris meant more to him than she did. But STOP using that one look Barry gave when Patty gave him her number as proof that he wasn't interested in her. I could show you a TON of times where his face absolutely lit up when he was around her. He was just taken by surprise early on and was holding himself back b/c he was hung up on Iris. But he had FEELINGS for Patty, and they were REAL. He rly liked her. A little nudging from Iris, and he was going to tell her he was the Flash! I mean, yes, he didn't fight for her & a couple eps later he was puddle of goo when he came face to face with Iris West-ALLEN on Earth 2, but I firmly believe he deliberately didn't fight for Patty b/c he realized her leaving town would successfully put her out of Zoom's obvious reach. He wouldn't have to worry about her being a target anymore and he could just focus on stopping Zoom. He HAD to push her away (even if it meant being emotionally cruel) in order to get her to LEAVE. You could SEE he was a wreck after their final confrontation in his lab. You can't convince me of any other reason he'd suddenly flip his switch from 2x10 to 2x11. It was NOT b/c he suddenly didn't care about her anymore after one week (or less) of being broken up. I just don't buy that. Even in 2x13 he mentions that he still misses her (despite forgetting her the second he spots E2!Iris lmao). But he was RLY into Patty. She was adorable & funny & they had a lot in common - BARRY's words. And despite what a majority of WA shippers personally think (I've noticed), I thought Grant & Shantel had a TON of chemistry. Without it, I don't think I would've gotten onboard w/ spallen, given how much I was dreading Barry getting in a relationship with someone who wasn't Iris. For crying out loud, he clearly felt bad about breaking things off with Linda as soon as he found out that deep down Iris had feelings for him, and he was dating her for way less time than he was Patty. All this is to say, while westallen is absolutely my OTP & I'd be horrified if Patty was brought back now b/c I truly believe spallen's chapter is done & I absolutely don't want it resurrected, I absolutely despise seeing Patty lumped in as a girl Barry didn't rly care about. To extend that to their actual dating relationship too?! Unbelievable. If Barry hadn't cared about her, he wouldn't have dated her. B/c that wouldn't have been fair to her or himself. Do I believe he'd prob have broken things off w/ her if he suddenly found out Iris wanted to be w/ him, the same as what happened with Linda? Yes. But that doesn't mean he didn't care about or wasn't attracted to Patty, b/c he was. Joe saw it plain as day, and he sure wasn't looking for it. If I had time, I'd make a big post w/ PICTURES showing my proof of all of this. But I won't subject my followers to that b/c I know most of you follow my blog for my westallen love & high key disagree w/ a lot of what's in this post, but it has just rly annoyed me what I've been seeing lately & I had to say something. Yes, Patty isn't Iris, and inevitably she wouldn't have been enough. But imo she could've amounted to Barry what Eddie was for Iris. Eventually (had Patty not left for the incredibly stupid reason that she did - s1!Iris SL anyone??), they would've fallen in love and lasted long term. Not forever b/c his heart is set on Iris and always will be, and it would've been unfair to Patty to pretend that wasn't the case, and he would've realized that eventually. But okay, his relationship with Patty was LEGIT. Plz stop using these ridiculous excuses & "proof" to say it wasn't. *DEEP BREATH* Okay, I'm done. ... Side note: plz don't send me asks raging abt how my thoughts here are false or how much you disagree w/ them, etc. I know y'all disagree b/c I've posted spallen posts in the past & lived to regret it. I just needed to get this off my chest. On the flip side, if you're a hardcore spallen fan & think they were so much better than westallen & Patty is better than Iris & spallen should be endgame instead, just...no. I can fight for westallen even harder than spallen, so don't even try. All I want is spallen to get the respect they deserve as a legitimate relationship, but not all the love that I had for them (& I loved them a LOT) could've equaled me wanting them as endgame. So, just...walk away. I know there are very few fans out there who ship both spallen & westallen, & also have the latter as their endgame OTP, but sometimes I multiship & that's the case w/ Barry. Though only w/ Patty. I wasn't feeling it w/ Linda OR Felicity. (The Felicity concept actually annoys me since I adore their friendship so much & feel like a potential romance ruins that.) And there was never anything w/ Caitlin, so I'm not even comparing her in the short term. Again, preferably no asks about this post, unless you agree or feel like you can discuss it objectively, which I'm also very capable of doing. I reeeeally needed to get this off my chest, but I don't want it to become a point of contention in my inbox. That is all. Thank you in advance.

[arctiinae]

RULES: Choose any three fandoms (in random order) and answer the questions, then tag 10 people you want to know better.

tagged by @keycchan​ thank you buddy <3

Three Fandoms:

Fallout 4

Motorcity

Brooklyn 99??? fuck idk I haven’t been in a lot of fandoms lately.

The First Character You Loved:

VALENTINE MY MAN. I was so excited about romancing him and THEN

Chuck is the cutest and most relatable man

Holt. Just- Holt.

The Character You Never Expected To Love So Much:

X6-88 probably? There’s a few I was pleasantly surprised about but yeah, X6 is a dear. A beloved death machine with feelings.

Claire. She’s a Good Friend. Very supportive. Stereotypical girly girl but turns out to have more depth to her character? Yes please.

Gina. She grows into a really good character without loosing her fuck-all attitude. Good shit.

The Character You Relate To The Most:

I don’t? know? Relating to characters isn’t very much a thing I do so imma skip this one.

The Character You’d Slap:

FATHER deserves a well delivered bitch slap.

THE FUCKING DUKE OF DETROIT I would punch his fucking teeth out and make a necklace out of them.

Boyle tbh. He’s a pain.

Three Favorite Characters (in order of preference):

Deacon, X6-88, Curie

Chuck, Dutch, Tennie

Rosa, Holt, Gina

(though tbh I like a lot of the characters in each of these shows and wouldn’t necessarily order them by preference idk)

A Character You Liked At First, But Don’t Anymore:

??? I DUNNO

shrugs vaguely

Terry? He… gets on my case after a while, poor guy. He’s still ok but eh.

A Character You Didn’t Like At First But Do Now:

Mmmmmaybe Danse? He’s not my favorite by far and I’m very much not interested in seeing him shipped, but I’ve read a few fics that gave him a bit more depth, which was nice. He’s still fairly boring to me though.

Texas, bless the fandom for giving him depth and redemable character traits because the show made him the vaguely annoying comic relief but he had potential.

Doug Judy, if I had to pick. He was an absolute pain in the first episode but I’m warming up to him a little bit.

Three OTPs:

uH Deacon/X6-88, Deacon/Valentine, Glory/all the ladies, idk man I’m flexible I will read anything given a good enough premise. Fo4 is the fandom of multiships.

Look just give me poliburners that’s all I want. All the poli.

??? haven’t… really gotten involved with the shipping at all but I will say I am relieved to see a healthy straight relationship in a show for a change. I groaned when it became obvious Jake/Amy would be a thing but GG to the showmakers, they are actually a pretty sweet couple!

Too fuckin’ lazy to tag anyone sorry but you do it and pretend I pinged you. Go.