#ineed to get one of these fucking jobs to hire me so i can spend my paychecks on the hobby instead pff

[duskerot]

world's normalest guy spends $100 on nendoroid parts

[fuck-customers]

Very long

I quit my job without notice back at the end of June. No, I didnt walk out of my shift. I came in, worked my shift fully, and then clocked out and gave them a notice of immediate resignation. It wasn't something I wanted to do, but I ended up backing myself into a corner and wasn't left with an option. Backstory - I had worked there for 2 years as a cashier, and was growing to more and more desperately loathe it. I am not a sociable person, I have several mental disorders that make dealing with people in general rather difficult, let alone having to do it as part of a job. I was able to do it rather well for a long time despite all of that. I had always rode my job like rising tides - times when I loved it, or at least tolerated it, and times where I almost quit and never looked back, but during those low times, made an effort to change how I was thinking, and rode the wave again. Only, towards the end, things just got so so bad, that despite my usual tricks and efforts to get back to handling my job, I couldn't. For me, I can handle shitty customers, or I can handle shitty coworkers (and management) but I cant handle both at the same time for a very long time. And with new management, i was sinking fast. We had gotten a new store manager from another store, that everyone basically hated. We had about half of the other store transfer to ours to escape him, and when he came he brought his entire possey with him. I didnt really fit in with it, nor did i really care to. So i was treated condescendingly, like I was new, like I was stupid, and didn't matter, by him, the store manager. I have a boatload of stories, even so far as to be unable/afraid to use the bathroom during desperate needs, because of him, and almost losing my job because of a flu and Facebook, but it'll make this drag out further than it already will, so maybe I'll talk about it in another post. And then my coworkers, for whatever reason, started being extremely rude and unhelpful. People in different departments would all but tell us cashiers to fuck right on off when we needed something, even if it was a simple price check or to bring up a fucking pineapple. (It wasn't a big store so it's not like I was asking them to go from one corner of Walmart to another.) Even worse was that they started treating me like I didnt know how to do my job. I would call back to produce to tell them that a sign was displaying the wrong price, and if they could fix it, and I was met with rudeness and insistence that I wasn't using the right code. That company is very produce heavy. I rang up every single type of tomato we sold every day. Almost every single order had one type or another. Roma and on the vine were the most popular. Im telling you the price is displayed wrong in your department, and you're just going to tell me to give them the price the customer asks for (not what I asked nor do Ineed your permission for that) and then yell at me that I'm using the wrong code like I dont type in 4664 almost every order every shift for 2 years? Fuck yourself Anyways, as I said, I started hating my job a lot. I knew I was reaching the point of no return, so I tried to switch departments. First, I did it the way you're supposed to - applying for it, and then telling management you were interested. I had another manager over my shoulder helping me with the application, as I had never done one as an employee before. When I went to go talk to the manager who was over one of the departments I applied to, she told the manager that helped me that I wasn't a good worker because I "wandered". I will admit to my faults, but if theres one thing I have never done, it's fucking wander. I confronted her about it and told her i didnt think that was fair, and she basically acknowledged me, but ultimately blew me off. How do I know? Because when I asked her about it again, she told me that she had checked with HR and that my application had mysteriously vanished. Yes, an online app, mysteriously wasn't there. She told me to check myself, so I did. The status of it said "submitted - not chosen". I let it go because it was clear she didnt like my work ethic and needed to lie about it. So giving up on the proper methods, I tried a different tactic and went to the manager who helped me with the application, who was over one of the other departments I wanted to work in - Grocery. I have a years experience stocking at fartmart, and they're a lot tougher and harder about stocking than this little store I was at. I jumped at every chance to get off register and be there. I asked the higher up manager about openings in the department every. Fucking. Day. EVERY. COCKSUCKING. DAY. I asked him about openings in grocery. Always met with nothing, they weren't hiring yet. As an extra measure I told the immediate manager over that department and that department only, that I was ready to help. Well, another thing is that I had told basically everyone that I would like to be a supervisor over the front end, a head cashier. I was really gunning for it hard. Even if it was still cashiering, it would be different, and at least I would have greater money handling and supervisor experience to help me at another job eventually, right? Well, I ultimately ended up backing off, because one of the requirements for being a HC was a 100% open availability, and due to having spawned my own child, I didn't have that anymore. ... ...Only to find out that two of my coworkers had been promoted to part time head cashiering. I was greatly upset. I was told that that wasn't a thing at all, and then suddenly it is, for everyone but me. And... literally the only person who would take me seriously about getting off the front end was the dairy manager. I was very forceful in telling him that I would seriously love to work for him in dairy. He told me he already had someone working in his department, but that he didnt know if it was going to work out, so he would talk to her and get back to me. Well... back to the grocery thing.... One day I walk into work and I hop on register. Partway through my shift, i look up, and i see the direct grocery manager training a new employee. I'm immediately and entirely baffled and filled with hurt rage. Then while I'm trying to process what I'm seeing, I'm told that theres a new cashier that's coming in to be trained as a HC. Yeah. In disbelief, I go on my break and find the dairy manager and ask him if he had talked to his subordinate. He had, and he regretfully told me that she was going to try to stick it out and make things work. He couldn't give me a job someone else had (which I genuinely dont hold against him - he's the only pure soul in this story, the only hero that tried for me). So as I go to go to the breakroom, I see the grocery manager walking with yet another higher up manager that I didnt talk to much. Grocery manager said hello, and I immediately confronted her, "so I see you hired someone new. What's up with that?" She then gave me some stupid half ass story about how she didnt think I was serious and thought I only wanted extra shifts in her department, not to switch depts permanently. WAIT, IT GETS BETTER. The higher up manager walking with the grocery manager pipes up right after she had given me that lame excuse with, "oh, nope, [my name] HATES being a cashier". All of that happened in one day, in the span of less than half an hour. After watching all of my prospects for off of the front end hell vaporize before my very eyes, I went to the bathroom and cried my eyes out for like 15 minutes. Just really, really sobbing. And after that, after all of that, I just couldn't take it anymore. I tried so hard to hang on, but I couldn't. My attitude with customers got bad, no matter how hard I tried to be mindful. I started slipping up and forgetting things and making stupid mistakes, and started getting in trouble with management due to customer complaints. I felt awful, because I truly wasn't trying to be mean, I was really trying to hold onto things, but I could no longer manage to hide the fact that I thought the customer was an idiot for asking me if I was open as I actively served customers before them. I couldn't conceal my seething hatred as people bombarded my register and got in my face before I had a chance to even log in. I developed what I believe to be stress induced IBS, where I ended up having to spend time in the bathroom EVERY DAY, and nothing helped it. It was especially bad in the mornings, and since apparently cleaning all of the front end during closing meant I was a wanderer, I was pulled off mids and closings and was forced into doing nothing BUT morning/opening shifts. Thought it was coffee causing my tummy upset, so I switched to energy drinks. Still had the issue. Thought it was caffeine, so i stopped drinking it altogether and just dealt with being tired. Didnt stop the issue. Started taking medicine. Still didnt stop the issue. I developed a late problem because sometimes I would be on my way out the door, only to have my stomach cramp and have to go back inside to the bathroom. Not being able to have caffeine became an issue because I got so anxious and stressed and depressed about my job, that in addition to stomach issues, I developed insomnia that I'm still battling, 2 months after the fact. It got to the point where I would be in the shower getting ready for work and I would be daydreaming about falling down the stairs and breaking my leg or arm so I wouldn't have to go in. It got to the point where I would be on my way to work hoping someone would t-bone me so I wouldn't have to work my shift. I had gotten suspended on my birthday in November 2017 while I had the flu, literally right after having to argue for my job and being told I was already taken off the schedule. I was on my second suspension in June 2018. I had 1 more point before I would be fired, and I ended up being late by exactly one minute on June 23rd because of my stomach issues. That day, I clocked in, found the store manager on the floor, and waited to talk to him. He stopped his conversation with another employee to ask me what I wanted, and I told him I had an attendance issue I needed to talk to him about. He didn't say it in the exact words, but he essentially told me to fuck off back to my register and ignored and dismissed me entirely. So I quit that day after my shift. It was either that, or wait to get fired. Looking back there was a lot i should have done differently - i probably should have tried to talk to my managers more an be more open about my physical issues that had started, at the least, despite their open disdain for me. But more than that, I should have just applied for another department in a different store and transferred out. I would probably still be with the company, and marginally happier. It was probably a good month before I could even drive past the place after quitting without having a panic attack. Quitting like that was not something I ever foresaw myself doing. Fantasizing about? Of course. But seriously? Never. And I felt, and still do, feel bad about it, even if most everyone there can go suck eggs. So why submit this all this time later? Why not right after it happened? Well, I thought my last paycheck and vacation and etc had been direct deposited into my account for my last paycheck all those months ago. But on Friday Sept. 7, while I was two states away in a Walmart, I got a call from them. It was surreal, given that I had had similar dreams that were, you know, dreams - but I answered, and it turns out that I have a last paycheck waiting for me there. I guess as revenge they waited 2 months to tell me I had money waiting. I had mostly gotten over the whole thing, and was even feeling a bit of rose tinted nostalgia... but the thought of actually having to go in and get my paycheck and face all those people and relive everything in stark detail is fucking me up. And I know I'm not going to have a good time when I actually do go get it. I feel miserable and anxious all over again. I want my money... but I dont want to have to see them or be in that place ever again. :/ (Apparently we cant tag through the app anymore? What?) Anyways... thanks for reading.