#is this just me asking a rethorical question on a post no one will pay attention to? yes

[tanukisurpreso]

should I post something I wrote about my ocs that only me and my best friend know about???

[iamdorka]

Craving (Sebastian Stan One shot)

Hi there! I just brought you something to read this beautiful saturday afternoon, I hope you will like it! You should know that english isn’t my first language so sorry for the mistakes but beside that I hope you will enjoy this!

Inspiration? THIS post from @amor-imagines (SO happy that she wouldn’t mind using her post, thanks for that again. Also you should really check out her page, it’s awesome)

Who is in it? Reader x Sebastian Stan (+ Chace Crawford x Elisabeth Olsen X Nina Dobrev x Jessica Szohr)

Words? 4049

Ps.: I don’t mind feedbacks at all! It would mean so much to me! <3

- Like really, Chace… what was that picture about? – I asked him this rethorical question but I knew he will answer it for me. I was sitting in my kitchen, my laptop was in my lap and I was at Chace’s Instagram profile while I was talking to him at the phone.

- You say that like it’s a huge problem.. – I could literally imagine his face saying that, like he was really playing with me.

„Here you have Sebastian Stan, talking on the phone with Y/N. I’m the third wheel even if Y/N is not here. #younglove – I read him out loud the capture of his latest instagram post which involved me, pretending I’m him.

- You know I don’t sound like that. – he clapped back right away, cleary avoiding my point. He thought he was good at this avoiding game, I knew he wasn’t. – Also… you don’t have to lie about it… I know he was talking to you then. – he added, feeling he was like a brilliant Sherlock Holmes.

- Why would I lie about it? – I knew he knew I was talking to Sebastian like 10 minutes ago, because Seb made me say hello to Chace because altough our friend tried his best spy game on Seb he failed miserably. Our friends really thought they were clever. They were painfully wrong.

- … on Sebastian’s face there was that cute smile which only appears when he is talking to YOU. You think we haven’t noticed it? – he really thought that I was this amateur after all this years of friendship? Poor Chace.

- Dear Chace….- I started while laughing hard. - … I knew you were there. Also Sebastian is one of my best friends, you can back off. – I added while resting my palms on my forehead.

- But really Y/N… have you seen the comments below? – I think he lives in such an alternative universe where he simply ingores what the other says, in this case one of his best friends, me.

- You are the one who really should know that reading all the comments does not lead to a good place. – I said while massaging my nose and thinking about that I’m spending my lunch break talking about this „important” issue.

„This is so cute” – silence – „Can we have an affirmation about Y/N and Seb? Are they really a thing? – silence – „I CAN NOT PROCESS THIS *heart eyed emojis*” – Chace thought that reading me the comments playing three different fangirls was a good idea but this really didn’t have an effect on me. I saw the comments and I knew there are lots of them like A LOT.

- You are worse than a child Chace, really. – I said while I held my phone between my face and shoulder and I may or may not started typing something in the comment section. – Although… you are on vacation… why is your phone glued to your hands? – I highlighted the most important thing. – Sent. – muttered myself quietly.

- Everyone is preparing themself for lunch, and I’m ready to go, besides…. don’t you miss your best friend? – he was reffering to himself trying to get an admitting answer from me.

- What a shame that my break is over. – I started acting like a drama queen trying to hold my laughing back. It was a total failure.

- You are a freelance writer, Y/N. – he highlighted that I organize my time as I want.

- Good bye Chace. – I giggled and I wanted to break the conversation but I heard his last words.

- I saw your comment. – he added like I didn’t know about that. It was on Instagram, on social media, for God sake.

„As you can see Chace, I’m there even if I’m not”. – this was my comment under that Sebastian picture leaving the conspiracy theories for the online community which I know really well and which included my dear friends too.

 I met Chace and Sebastian on the set of Gossip Girl years ago and while they were actors in the show I was an intern for the writers and actually afters years I became one too. Even the show ended years ago our friendship didn’t. And over the years we became more than friends, we became family, a real family. We could be in different parts of the world but we were there for each other. Always.

- Our lunch date is still going on, right? – I could deny that I live my life on my phone but it wouldn’t really matter anyway so right now I was talking to Lizzie ont he phone, aka to Miss Olsen.

- I already see the wineglass in my hand, I’m daydreaming about it. – I answered while I kept reading the script which I was working on right now. I tried to save what I could but it was really a challenge.

- I have exactly the same daydreams… - she added laughing. – I think this day will never be over. – I could really hear in her voice that she was tired af. – Don’t you dare starting without me. – she said when she heard that I was drinking something.

- Chill out girl… it’s only lemonade. – I laughed.

- As if you were on vacation too…hmm… how interesting is that. – she commented that shamelessly and before even she could start to say something else they were calling her back to work.

- It looks like somebody has to work. I’m so sorry. – I acted like I was sorry but both of us knew I wasn’t.

- This is not over yet… - she threatened me but it was more like funny than scary.

They all were on a mission which really doesn’t include me but actually it was all about me… and Sebastian.

We were friends. We are friends. Me and Sebastian. We knew that.

No… I wasn’t blind or something like that. I saw what I saw and I knew the years were really good for Sebastian. But nothing really showed that we should be together. Yes there were some periods in our life when we were both singles at the same time and also we could be really flirty sometimes but that was all. Also we should really mention that Sebastian is always so flirty with women even with men too so it wasn’t something special with me. Although I knew something else… I knew that this flirting for him was an automatic wall around him protecting his soul. It doesn’t really harm anybody so… why should I be the one not to play along?

- Woaaahhh, what a beautiful date I have here! – Lizzie welcomed me when I probably arrived not long after her at the restaurant.

- You just said that to the bottle of wine what you just ordered, right? – I leaned closer to her just to kiss her cheek.

- It was just waiting for you. – and she gave the waiter the sign that he could pour us some wine. And oh my gosh, my soul was so waiting for this moment that I can not put into words. Closing my eyes I just enjoyed how the fresh wine cooled not just my body but my soul too. – I hope you missed me too. – she said smiling.

- I was literally counting the hours until our date… - I admitted it and grabbed some salted pastries while I was waiting for our orders. We have a habit that when we come here we always order the „Pasta of the day” and it has never disappointed us. Never. - … I’m really happy that I don’t see scripts or any work related stuffs. – I layed back to my chair enjoying the calm situation.

- Good, because if I had to change my outfit one more time I would literally run from here naked.- she admitted, probably she had a really challenging photoshoot today.

- To the working ladies. – I raised my glass and so did she.

- To working ladies who want to be drunk desperately tonight… because we deserve it. – she completed my sentence stylishly and I couldn’t agree with her more.

- Ohh sure we do. – I heard some new voice behind me and soon it was not just one person but two actually.

- I hope you don’t mind I invited them too to our date night! – Lizzie said while welcoming the two new arrivers.

- Nina, Jessica! – I inmediatly put my glass on the table and stood up hugging both of them at the same time.

- I just heard someone mentioning drunk friends. – Nina raised her eyebrows smiling at us.

- One more of this! – I inmediatly pointed at the wine bottle while looking at the waiter.

- As you wish. – he said nicely… and yeah our night started and countined as we tought it would.

After the best pasta of the city and maybe two bottles of the finest wine we just were so happy we could walk ont he streets holding each others arms. We were young and we missed each other so much. These nights when we were in the same city at the same time were to remember and we knew how to make the best of it.

- The camera is here. – Nina shouted us quite cheerfully, just like a little kid, when she wanted to take a group selfie but we didn’t really payed too much atention to her phone.

- Okay, okay, okay!- I put my arms around her neck and kissed her cheeck sweetly, so did the others.

- You… Instagram addicted people… are the worst. – I laughed and this was the first time I grabbed my phone from my purse this night.

- You seriously think we should hide from the world how awesome we are? – Nina asked this with quite a straight face.

- It would be such a shame not share it… - it was so hard not to burst into laughter but I just looked at my phone and saw something that inmediatly put my thoughts somewhere else. Maybe 2 hours ago Lizzie shared a photo of me on Instagram with quite an interesting capture: 

„Hi Sebastian, isn’t my date really HOT? I mean… just look at her *fire emojis*” – the capture was interesting but what were even more interesting were the comments. „Just the fact that Lizzie mentioned Sebastian in the post is more than suspicious.”

- You know you are out of your mind, right? – I showed Lizzie the post while the others tried to read my face.

- I have a really hot date… I don’t see what’s the problem. – she said innocently and I think she lived in the same parallel universe as Chace… maybe she was even worse.

- Let’s be clear… we are each others dates. – Jessica said while hugging us. – Although… have you thought about that you would have more than beautiful kids with Sebastian? Just imagine it! Oh my gosh! – I knew she was in that other universe too and as she was thinking about that absurd conspiracy she started fanning herself with her hand.

- I just have to aggree with them. You two would make a gorgeous couple. – Nina joined in too and she started to talk to the sky… or to God while praying for us. They all were crazy.

- You people… - I shook my head while searching with my eyes the nearest bar I really needed a drink. - … you have so much free time in your hands. – I said and inmediatly disappeared because on the other side of the street I found what I wanted. They had to run just to catch me but I was in before they could do that. – I just don’t want to dry out. – I touched my throat smiling and headed to the bar. – 4 tequila gold. – I said to the bartender. – Make it 8. – I looked at the girls.

- Why do I have the feeling that you are avoiding a concrete topic… getting drunk? Why do you avoid talking about him? – Jessica asked too many questions and I really felt my head was full. Gladly the bartender just served us.

- I just want to be shamelessly drunk… my soul needs it…really. – I insisted and while I was doing that I put my first but not the last portion of cinnamon on the back of my hand before drinking that tequila.

- You know… If we wanted to put more stereotypical topics in this conversation we just couldn’t. Why? Because we are the worst. – I told Jessica as she put her phone in my face on which I could see several of our male friends doing some photoshoots while wearing barely nothing. – Okay… let’s see. Hmmm. – I gave in… I just gave in. The things I was seeing.. or at least I could imagine while looking at those photos made my heart skipping a beat. Yeah… I was drunk and I didn’t really think about rights and wrongs. – This is really a hard question…. – I said while I was thinking like my life deppended on this answer.

- Let me see… - Lizzie joined me zooming on the pics pretending it was a really hard task we had to deal with. – I don’t know…I don’t know… - she put her head on her palm.

- It’s the big range… isn’t it? – Nina asked us while looking firmly at our face. She was more than curious for our decision.

- Mr. Crawford isn’t that bad although… - Lizzie said thinking loudly.

- I have to agree with that but Mr. Hemsworth’s arms look so… strong. – I admitted and my thoughts inmediatly flew somewhere else.

- Wife, children. – Jessica said with a sad smile on her lips.

- I know that. – I agreed with her knowing our limits very well even while drunk.

- But look at this gentleman… at Mr. Hiddleston… dear Lizzie… what could you tell us about him? – I turned to her because I knew really well that she shared more than Marvel movies with him and she could know a thing or two about him.

- Tom is a… gentleman. – she said and as soon as those words left her lips she turned so red you could not imagine that. She was so cute.

- Why is that you left out one person on purpose? – Jessica literally put her phone in my face like my lips almost reached the screen on which was a photo of him… of Sebastian.

- You want me to say that out loud? Really? – I asked this three ladies around me while trying to hide that photo of him from my eyes.

- Yeah. – just like a chorus they said it at once.

- You can wait for that…

 I didn’t really know how I managed to get in a cab but I was in one, and I just realised that when I opened my eyes because surely I was sleeping before. When I tried to breath in the cold morning air I realised it wasn’t that cold as it used to be… it was more humid and my lungs didn’t really liked that. I almost chocked just trying to breath.

- Look… this will help. – Jessica put a bottle in my hands and I gladly drank from it because I needed something to cool my lungs.

- This is… wine. – I almost started laughing but I drank that liquid as it was water.

- This was your idea on the airport… saying this way we won’t break the wine bottle. – Lizzie said this and while she did that I started to realise something… looking out the windows I could see clearly even with my hungover/drunk eyes that we weren’t in New York anymore.

- Arrived, ladies. – I heard the driver and I think his words were even more cruel to my body than the alcohol was. I needed a drink just to process this.

- Airport? – I asked as quite as possibly I could massaging my nose not even looking at my friends.

- Airport. – Lizzie confirmed that and stealing some french fries from Nina she looked at me like in the movies like she was eating popcorn.

- Really? – I asked really hoping that it was just a dream and somehow I will wake up soon in my own apartment.

- Really. – Jessica patted my shoulder and they could not hold in anymore. They bursted into laughter. Literally the whole cab was shaking because of them, but they really didn’t mind that at all.

I remembered literally nothing about the last couple of hours like this tiny sleeping period wiped out my whole memory section.

- We have more of this… right? – I asked holding this water/wine bottle in my hands. – Because I will not and can not explain this in a sober state of mine. – I said and carefully I started to get out of the cab. The one thing that helped me get through the whole situation that I wasn’t the only one who looked like shit. Okay… we were not looking like shit we just looked quite hungover and hungry, yes… really hungry. – Do I need even ask whose idea was this? – I put my hands on my hips as soon as I put my sunglasses on because this morning sunshine of Miami really started to hurt my eyes.

Yes… we were in Miami. Clearly I don’t know how we got here but I think they weren’t sure either.

- Do they know about us? – I turned to them and I felt if I don’t get out of my leather jacket I will burn alive here.

- I don’t think so. – Lizzie admitted while resting her chin on my shoulder.

- Okay… then I will burry myself under that tree. – I pointed at a random tree. – With this. – I added, grabbed the french fries from Nina’s hand but when I started to walk slowly a familiar face appeared in the main door of the mansion.

- Wow… wow… wow… fu… - I think he just wanted to go running but when he stepped outside he just met with four of his friends… from New York. It was a surprise for him clearly... but for us too, we could not deny it even if we tried.

- Chace! – I smiled at him with an awkward grin on my lips and before he could say something I started to walk towards him wanting to get inside of the house. We were here, we really could not do anything about it.

- Do I even want to know? – he asked the million dollar question and I stopped just in front of him just like a zombie.

- You think I could answer your question? – I ’answered’ and kept going inside. – I think I will drown myself in that pool. You will find me there. Okay? Bye. – I shouted just letting them to know where to find me.

The truth was my only desire right now was to find a cold and horizontal place where I could sleep through this, waking up in New York, hopefully.

Without thinking I stepped in the first room I found and I gladly could realise that it wasn’t some sort of storage and that the bed was empty… waiting just for me. Throwing my stuffs beside it I fell in it with my face because I really didn’t care. It was so comfy and cold and I think it was heaven on earth for me at that time. I could literally start crying because of the joy I was feeling like this bed hugged me in a way that I needed so much.

- Hmmm… what a suprise I got here. – I heard a voice from possibly the bathroom door and I just could not believe it. Without looking at him or even without opening my eyes I crawled to the pillows and layed there… just existing.

- I think it would be impossible to explain this. – I murmurred myself.

- Why should you explain it? – his voice this time came from a closer spot and I felt that the bed under him moved too so I knew he was right beside me… I felt it.

- I don’t know. – I admitted and completly felt my body melting into this bed. There was no scenario where I would leave this bed without sleeping a good one.

We were in silent, my face in the pillow and I just could not move… and the matter of fact I didn’t really want to do that. I was so calm there. And that’s when I felt that he moved my hair to one place because I think it was all over the bed and it started to get really warm around me.

- Thanks. – I said and I gathered all my strength to move a bit just to face him. I even opened my eyes. – Do I remember well… that… we even got a shipname last night? – the memories started to came back from last night… or at least some of them.

- You remember that we got a shipname… but you don’t remember how you got here? – he said laughing and he put his wet palm to my forehead and honestly it was the best idea ever.

- These memories are so strange. – I tried to shook my head but I failed but when he wanted to move his fingers from my forehead I inmediatly took his wrist. - „I’m quite jealous Miss Y/N. What about me?” – I remembered one of his comments below Lizzie’s picture of me and I said it out loud. Or at least I thought I remembered it but after all I woke up in Miami… so everything could happened.

„Chill out dear Stan…. you are my next one, just get back from that vacation of yours” – he answered me and I knew that comment was real. I texted him this on Instagram, right in front of thousands of people.

- I really want to burry myself. – I fell back watching the ceiling. I will never drink again, I stated this for myself.

- But what happens if I don’t get back to the city from my vacation… because you come to my vacation first? – he asked me and I just wanted to forget that he is in only a towel like 2 inches away from me. My toughts were not sane. I was not sane. I was here…. from New York.

- I don’t think that my body or my soul can even understand this. – I said it while looking at his perfect ocean blue eyes. Like he was a real God on this Earth. And that fluffy wet hair of his… my gosh. It would be better if I just fell asleep right away.

- What if I tried to help you understand it? – his smell was so charming and I started to loose it. With his free hand he touched my bare thigh and the shiver what it caused was unexplicable. Slowly he started to pulling my skirt higher and higher.

- After all this… I think unnecessary to resist! – I started to laugh in awkwardness and surprising him and myself too I reached out to his neck and pulled him on top of me just to get his sweet lips on mine. And oh my god, his lips, his tongue made wonders with mine.

- I’m so sorry… - I said it when I broke the kiss needing some air.

- What… what are you sorry for? – he asked putting these words on my lips. He stayed there and I think he didn’t really want to move away.

- Maybe for the fact that I present myself for you the very first time like this… - and I really felt that I was getting all red under him. He just got out of the shower and I technically fell into his bed like a drunk teenager after a really long night.

- So you were thinking about our first time? – he leaned closer as he put his fingers on my hips firmly.

- What do you think?