#it kinda feels slightly slapstick?? I don't know

[kookslastbutton]

Too Late to Dream ༓ jjk (m) II ch. II

✑ Summary: You did it. You married your college professor. You even bought a house together. Against all odds, everything had fallen into place. But after two years of marriage, you begin feeling something was missing. You want a baby but your husband can’t say the same.

Pairing: economics professor!jungkook x fem!artist!reader

AU/Genre: angst, smut, fluff, marriage au, age gap, series

Rating: M, 18+

Word Count: 5,044

Warnings: 8-year age gap, flashbacks of professor-student relationship (oc was a Masters student), fighting, pent-up issues/desires, jk has daddy issues, mentions of therapy, kookie trying to be a good husband, cute coupley stuff that idk anyone will like but 🥺 👉👈, jk says cawk , idk why this is a warning

Now Playing: Make It Right, Tryna Be, Infinity, It Will Rain, Heaven+

A/N: Hi guys! I'm back! I thought I'd start off with a little flashback and then diving back into the story. Also, big thing–I decided not to make jk a complete butt. I don't want this story to be about "jk finally coming around after treating oc like garbage for wanting a kid". It's more of a we'll figure-it-out-together kinda thing though there will be bumps in the road. Anyway, enjoy 🥰

<< ch.I ༓ ch. III >> | series masterlist

To say falling in love with Jungkook was an effortless, butterflies-in-your-tummy, love-at-first-sight, you-know-it-when-you-see-it sort of affair is far from the truth. In actuality, you and Jungkook met on a very normal basis and had very normal rapport…well, somewhat normal.

Jungkook was your economics professor in grad school and you were merely one out of eighty of his students during the first semester. Surely you'd be walking out with no more than a barely scrimmaged 'A' and remnants of stupid economics jokes he and his colleagues found slapstick funny.

Jungkook always had an interesting sense of humor.

Bottom line? Your life wasn't a drama and you certainly didn't plan on living like it was–especially when your parents were on your tail, making sure their hard-earned money was well spent.

As if being bonked on the head by something called fate, however, Jungkook sent you away with far more than odd jokes and good grades.

Hey, hindsight is 20/20.

four years ago

“Oh, good morning.” A soft, yet hoarse voice strides past you. You view the man, estimating that he be in his early 30s though could easily pass for 25 by his youthful appearance. His hair is black, a bit shaggy but well-kept nonetheless. Silver piercings dangle from his ears and a pair of rectangular glasses rest on his perfectly symmetrical face. This is your professor?

Undoubtedly, what mesmerizes you the most is the striking arm tattoo partially displayed under the rolled-up sleeves of his dress shirt. You remember temporarily considering tattoo artistry in high school but studio arts appealed to you more.

Not like you got to do either though, seeing as you’ve been stuck in econ for the fifth year in a row. You’re parents insisted you get your master’s immediately after undergrad…how wonderful for you.

But back to the man at the front of the room. You weren’t expecting someone so hip and attractive–very, very attractive.

Your stomach churns but you brush the feeling away.

He's your professor for god sake.

The man, coincidentally your professor, quirks a small smile your way and sets his bag on the podium at the front. “Didn’t expect anyone to be here for another twenty minutes.”

“I just got out of another class a couple of rooms down so I’m here early.” You straighten in your seat and return a smile of your own. “It’s nice to meet you Dr. Jeon. I’m Y/N.” You start bouncing your leg up and down, clicking the pen in your hand. Please be right, please be right, you chant silently, hoping you remembered the name correctly.

Jungkook notices your slightly restless state but he doesn’t say anything about it.

“Just to be sure, you are here for ECON 602 right? Macroeconomic Theory?” He unzips his bag and sets his laptop on the podium. Making brief eye contact, he catches sight of the piece of paper directly below your nose. “That’s a beautiful sketch.”

You glance down, moving the paper to the side as if embarrassed. Not many people see your work beyond close friends, and even then you like to keep it to yourself. “Yes, absolutely,” you reply. “ECON 602, 12:15 pm. And thanks, I draw as a hobby.”

Your professor hums, nodding as he connects the HDMI cable to his laptop and lowers the presentation board.“ Dr. Kim is going to be quite jealous when he hears such artistic talent is in my economics class.” He lets out a slight chuckle. “You don’t mind if I tell him, do you? A little competition we have going on.”

You snort at the comment.

Dr. Kim Taehyung was the art department’s most talked about professor. Everyone knew him for his extremely unique perspective, classy personality, as well as his breathtaking artwork. You’ve passed him in the hallways a number of times, wishing you could study under him and dare you say, in more ways than one.

“I don’t mind.” You shake your head. “Are you and Dr. Kim close?” Maybe you shouldn’t be this curious but it was now fifteen minutes until the start of class and no one else had shown. What else were you going to fill time with? Awkward silence while you watch your professor fumble and tap on his keyboard?

“We were colleagues if you can believe that.” He pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose. “Only two years ahead of me in undergrad. When I first started teaching here I had no idea he was here too. But you know what they say __, it’s a small world.”

“Smaller,” you retort. “I feel like everywhere I go I run into someone I’ve known or seen at some point in my life. You just never really know I guess.” When you first entered university, you were counting your lucky stars that most of your high school peers were attending college nearby your hometown. You on the other hand were a good five to six hours from home. Last you checked, however, half of those peers were now getting married or on their second kid. Crazy how some people’s lives change on a dime.

You watch as your professor shuffles a few sheets of paper in his hands, scanning them briefly. “I can relate to that,” he mutters. “Pretty sure we haven’t met before though. Could be a bigger world than we think. Now where’s everyone else? Didn’t all drop last minute did they?” The man lifts his head, flashing a big gorgeous grin. His eyes are playful and dance with mirth.“Not that I would mind if it were just you and I this whole semester.“

“uh–“ is embarrassingly, all you say. He isn’t implying anything by that right? Oh god __, don’t be stupid. As you've established, this isn’t a romance novel and you’re most definitely not the main character.

“You seem attentive is what I mean,” the man says, breaking you out of your daze. “And beyond punctual. Two qualities that I hold in high esteem.” You’d say he had a tiny smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth but it was likely an illusion. Your professor has bigger fish to fry than worry about any possible scenarios you’ve concocted in your silly head.

Still, in a moment of sheer thoughtlessness, you say something you regret being unable to retract. “Thank you, I like you too.” As soon as the words fly out you feel the need to run out and bang your head against the wall. Thinking on your feet wasn’t your specialty.

Little to your knowledge, Jungkook finds your mannerisms cute and stifles the temptation to tease. You’re his student, after all, a little professionally please, he repeats to himself.

“So are you from here?” Jungkook asks, choosing to switch the topic before both of you get swallowed into a messy situation.

You shake your head in denial. “I live here temporarily but I grew up about five hours north of here. My parents are still there.”

“Ah, well that’s a bit away. I imagine you miss them?”

You ponder the question for a second, eyes rolling up in contemplation. “From time to time.” Jungkook gives a knowing look. He’s had his share of familial drama and the need for space.

“I understand,” he says. “I grew up ten hours south myself.”

“Wow, that’s…far.” You’re surprised by the distance and can’t imagine it’s an easy commute. You wonder how long he’s been here and more so, if he’s here alone.

“Yeah.” He rests his palms on the edge of the podium, leaning on them gently. The protruding veins in his forearms catch your attention but you pry yourself from lingering. After what you said earlier, the last thing you want is for Dr. Jeon to think you're coming on to him. “Gets a little quiet sometimes but I’ve learned to live with it.”

As if immune to learning from your mistakes you blurt exactly what’s in your head.“So you’re not–“

“Married? Dating? Seeing someone?” Jungkook finishes your sentence like it’s nothing he hasn’t done tenfold times before. “No. I’m not.”

You give a small “Ah,” nodding in understanding before another classmate walks in, putting an abrupt end to the conversation. Jungkook is quick to greet the young man who’s joined but he’s certain he won’t be forgetting your name anytime soon.

present

You tilt your head back, allowing beads of hot water to run down your bare skin. The sound of steady pattering combined with heavy steam relaxes your muscles.

You can't believe you actually told him.

Blurting out to Jungkook that you wanted a baby in the middle of a fight is not how you intended to open up to your husband. But everything escalated so fast that it just came out.

You think back to last night’s events.

Once the movie's credit scenes appear Jungkook feels your eyes burn through him from your lounged position. "You're making that face again," he says.

"There's no face."

"Look," Jungkook cuts shortly. "Will you just tell me so we can deal with it?!"

"Just deal with it? Like it's some kind of nuisance of an issue that needs treatment?" You jump up from the couch and head to your bedroom in a fury, your husband hot on your trail.

"I don't mean to be pissing you off, sweetheart but I know something's up." He follows you into the bathroom, watching you reach for your toothbrush. "Can you please slow down and talk to me?" He grabs the toothpaste before you can, forcing you to stop in your tracks.

"I–I want…I want to be a mom. I want a baby."

"A baby? What do you mean you want a baby?" You see the panic settling in his eyes. Jungkook takes you into his arms, his thumb wipes off some of your tears. "Honey, I'm sorry I didn't know. When you came home from the park I didn't realize that little boy meant so much to you."

You try blinking back your tears but they keep running down your face. He's being gentle with you and you appreciate that but his choice of words tells you his answer is no. It's quiet, subtle, and cuts like a knife.

You break away from him to splash cold water on your face. The coolness calms your nerves. “He didn’t. Never–never mind what I said, sorry. I’m tired and I’m probably not thinking straight.”

It was a blatant lie but just look at your situation. Married for two years, still on birth control, and had no plans to change that. Suddenly one party diverts from the plan fully aware that the other is perfectly comfortable with the current plan.

Yes, you hoped he'd have a slightly better reaction but you don't blame him for his stunned look.

Plus, did you even have enough time to realize what you were saying? Feeling? It could easily be written off that you were simply impulsive, emotionally vulnerable, and so on with the track record you had regarding kids and parenting.

You sigh, bitter aftertaste in your mouth.

Not much else happened after the fight. Jungkook apologized again with his arms wrapped around your waist. He snuggled his nose in the crook of your neck and kissed your cheek too.

It was the usual, it felt familiar and warm but the pang in your head put a roadblock to that. No marriage is perfect. You know that. But you have a feeling you and Jungkook are headed for a steep valley, both on opposing sides.

"Hi.” You’re taken out of your thoughts when you hear the shower door pop open. Your husband steps in, with messy hair and half-open lids. Evidently, still sleepy.

You spare him a glance and quickly reach for your body wash on the shelf. “Hi,” you reply back, voice monotone.

Jungkook moves closer behind you and curves an arm around you. He grabs the bottle out of your hand and squirts some of the soap into his palm. “How did you sleep?”

A small shiver runs up your spine when his cool hand rubs circles against your upper back and shoulder. It still feels nice, you admit. You see some of the soap drip down and hit the shower floor.

“I slept okay. You?”

“I’m about the same.” Jungkook moves his hand a little lower, making sure to cover your whole backside. “I’m really sorry about how I handled things last night. What I said and how I said it was inexcusable.”

“Please, Jungkook you don’t have to keep apologizing about it. I know…and I’m sorry I spurred it on you so suddenly. It’s not how I wanted you to find out.” if at all, you add to yourself.

“Is it still true?” he asks, stopping his movements. “Do you really want to start a family?”

You feel queasy all over again. His tone is serious and if you turn around you’ll likely see the fire in his eyes. So you remain in your position, facing towards the shower head.

“I don’t know…” you finally say after thirty seconds of eerie silence. “But I think I do, I really do. Seeing our friends and other people our age have kids makes me wonder if we’d ever have that. I can’t explain why right now. I know it’s unexpected after we’ve been living a sort of way for so long.” After another pause you continue. “But I know it’s not a mutual thing and that’s…okay.”

“Sweetheart, even if we were to have kids…where would we find the time? The school year’s starting soon and I’m gonna be running ragged at the university next week. You know my schedule. I teach Monday through Friday, leaving at 7:15 am and returning around 4 p.m. You leave for work a little later in the morning but get back at 5 p.m. All our week consists of will be eating a quick dinner together, then I have to squirrel away to my office for the night to review class notes and grade stacks of assignments.”

Though you’re aware of how crazy busy Jungkook gets during the school year, you’re not foolish enough to believe that is the root of his argument.

“Maybe you’re right that we don’t have much time now but Jungkook, we can figure it out. You only teach 9 months out of the year and I can–I can stay at home or we can hire a nanny. And we don’t have to do it right away but–“

“__.” Jungkook turns you around so you’re looking eye to eye. He hesitates to say his next words, fearing a replay of yesterday. But he can’t bring himself to pretend with you. Not on something this serious. “I understand and I want more than anything to tell you I want the same, but I can't lie to you. Being a father, and having a kid, I think it’s wonderful but I just never saw that for myself. I’m so sorry I–”

Your heart concaves into your chest. You absolutely want him to be honest but it pains you to hear. Where do you go from here?

Slowly, you wrap your arms around his neck. Jungkook jolts a bit, surprised by your sudden gesture but welcomes the embrace.

“It’s okay Jungkook.” You settle your head into his shoulder, simply wanting to be close. One tear spills out, then another. “It’s okay.”

“No, look at me __. You didn’t let me finish.” You lift your head from his shoulder. Jungkook strokes your back soothingly before continuing. “If this is what you want, then I’m not going to stand here and be the asshole husband that just dismisses it. But this is a big step.”

You shake your head in disbelief. “Don’t say what I think you are. Jungkook you don’t have to do anything.”

“I’m not saying I change my mind.” Of course, that would be unrealistic, you talk yourself through, preparing for his next words. “However, I am–I am willing to seriously consider this whole thing, babies, diapers, strollers, all of it. But I need you to be sure that this is what you want. And the only way I think that can happen is if we start this slow. Sounds like I’m making some sappy speech huh?”

Jungkook cracks a faint smile.

You look like you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop or for him to yell psyche and flick your forehead or something.

But none of that happens.

Instead, Jungkook unwraps one of your arms from around your neck, places a light kiss on your knuckles, and stares deep into your eyes as if making a promise. “I know this isn’t exactly heaven to your ears but I’m just trying to say, let’s not rush to a decision yet, okay? All of this did just get revealed yesterday and I think it’d be unfair to both of us if we scurry past it without thinking.”

Shocked. You’re utterly shocked. You were expecting him to give you a flat-out no or attempt to cover up the issue somehow. While, this isn’t your ideal outcome, if Jungkook is willing to take this seriously, no bullshit necessary, then so are you.

“Thank you, Jungkook.” You smile at him, feeling a tad lighter than you did before. Your heart beats again, slow and steady. “I love you.”

“I love you more than anything __. I married you and I intend to keep it that way.” Jungkook sneaks a wink and you press a kiss to his lips.

“Hey,” you pipe up. “It’s Sunday isn’t it?”

Jungkook nods in confusion. “It is..?”

“You have somewhere to be this morning don’t you?” You wait a moment before an oh-shit expression forms on Jungkook’s face.

As you remember your husband was supposed to be at some fancy gold club today. Like Jimin, a certain Kim Taehyung had his weekly “thing” too. Being close friends, Jungkook was supposed to be there, along with Hoseok.

“‘You're so right. 'M sorry honey I gotta go. They’re gonna kill me." Jungkook gives you one last kiss before slipping out of the shower. "I’ll be back for dinner.”

“Jungkook! Where the fuck have you been? We tried calling you!” Taehyung is the first to speak as soon as he catches sight of the younger man. He has his usual blush pink polo shirt on paired with well-pressed beige shorts.

He looks a little too handsome for golf.

Jungkook’s secretly glad his wife stayed home this time, as he’s fully aware of her mini crush on Taehyung in school. When she first found out they were colleagues he could tell she had borderline stars in her eyes.

“Sorry sorry,” Jungkook says. “I was doing stuff and time escaped me. Plus, I didn’t have my phone near me for a bit. But I’m here now, so let’s get going!” Jungkook walks in front of the two men, heading for the first stage of the golf course. “You guys coming?” He turns around and lifts both arms up.

Taehyung and Hoseok exchange looks before following his lead. It’s unlike Jungkook to be this eager for golf. In fact, he hates golf. And his explanation is a bit…questionable.

As much as Hoseok is a friend, he is also just as much of a psychologist who can't stop himself from practicing his craft when given the chance. “You doing alright?” Hoseok waits for Jungkook to answer, one hand clings around the top of his golf club while the other settles around his hip. "Haven't seen you since Jimin's last dinner.”

"Yeah, I'm good," Jungkook barely replies, watching Taehyung practice and few swings before taking the shot. Like a prodigy, it sinks right in. "Hole in one again man? I thought you painted."

Taehyung glances over his shoulder with a smug expression, cocky smirk, and sunglasses behind his head. "Don't be too jealous of hyung, Jungkookie."

"Fuck off Tae," Jungkook quips back. "I'm not 22 anymore. I have a good job, nice house, and a gorgeous wife waiting for me at home. What do you have? A bunch of golf balls in your pants.”

Hmm, a little more defensive than usual, Hoseok notes. And guarded too, something’s up.

"About that wife of yours Kook," Hoseok drawls. "How she doing?" Jungkook turns towards the man, slight distaste on his face.

“Uh, she’s fine. Thanks for asking. Also, I know what you’re doing and I’m not in the mood.”

"Ah Jungkook, you act like I'm being so malicious.” Smiling, Hoseok continues. “Can't I care about my friend of ten years without such accusations?"

Jungkook sighs and kicks the grass. Hoseok has been one of his closest friends for a long time so if there's anyone worth talking to about his current situation and who'd understand, I'd be him. "Well, I’m not saying much right now but.....__ recently told me she wants a baby. I’m still–I'm having trouble processing it. But I’m trying.”

Hoseok throws a hand behind the younger's shoulder. “That’s big news Jungkook and it’s completely fine that you’re still working through it. Don’t feel like you have to speed up the process either. I’ve known you both long enough to know that parenting hasn’t really been in the cards until now so I’m surprised myself.”

“I think she’s still a little unsure, but something happened the other day and it struck a cord inside her. She wants a family and,” Jungkook steps to the side, and Hoseok's hand slips from his shoulder. “I wish I could tell her I want it too. But I can't lie to her like that. I also don’t want her to bury that desire for my sake, so I told her we could consider it. I don’t know man, I feel like I’m trying to do the right thing but I don’t know if I can do this. Will I ever change my mind? I want to, for her.”

Hoseok looks at his friend with soft eyes, compassion in them. “Unfortunately, this is not something you can foresee nor force. At least not this early. But you’re definitely doing the right thing by not brushing her off. As real as your feelings are about not wanting a child right now, so are __'s feelings. It’s best you listen to both sides.”

Jungkook tousles his hair around. “I just–fuck.”

Hoseok doesn’t need further explanation to understand Jungkook’s predicament. He’s frustrated, blames himself, and is struggling to come to terms with reality. The unknown scares him and he doesn’t want to lose control of what little he has. “I’m sorry, Kook…it’s a heavy load. Why don't you come in for a session sometime? I think this might be something worth talking through."

“You mean therapy? I don't know, I’m about to have a pretty tight with school starting.”

"One hour, forty minutes at least," Hoseok insists. "Why not try it once and if you don't like it, you don't have to do it again. I love you both and as a friend, I want to be here for you. Beats standing around and watching Taehyung kick our ass at golf. Just think about it and let me know. As I said, I'm always here for you bro."

Jungkook nods and reaches a hand out to gently squeeze Hoseok's shoulder. "I'll think about it. Thanks."

"Hey!" Taehyung waves from afar. "What you guys doing still up there? I’ve been waiting for twenty minutes! Don’t forget that last place buys lunch.”

“He’s referring to you Kook.” Hoseok chuckles, slaps Jungkook on the back, and walks down the golf course toward Taehyung. “You suck at golf.”

Jungkook grunts, following close behind. If this were a benching competition he’d be taking home the whole damn meal.

With Jungkook still gone doing who knows what with his buddies you decide to blast your very wide array of music. It’s a good thing you and Jungkook live in your own house or else your poor neighbors would be knocking down the door with the landlord by now. Yes, that may or may not have happened once with you were in college.

Along with the music you stick true to your character and spread your art supplies on your drawing table. You had your own mini studio, thanks to your wonderful relator who helped find you the house. You reach for a pencil, spinning it between your fingers. Maybe you should finish the drawing of the park’s pond.

Mm, you don’t really feel like packing all your supplies and driving over right now.

Deciding to save it for another day, you ponder ideas of what to do instead. Should you try out your new watercolors? You bought them last week and while you weren’t exactly in low supply, if your husband can have a hundred scented candles you can have your paints.

bling–

You snatch your phone hearing the notification bell.

Jungkook: the rest of your morning going well? [sent at 11:03 a.m]

You smile faintly and type out a reply. Sweet to check in you suppose.

__: Fine. How are the guys? [sent at 11:04 a.m]

Jungkook: Whooping my ass but it’s alright. [sent at 11:07 a.m]

Good, you smirk. Jungkook is awful at golf. And he can stand to lose at something like the rest of you.

__: When are you coming home? [sent at 11:10 a.m]

Jungkook: Looking to wrap things up around 4 pm. I think we’re having a late lunch. Miss you. [sent at 11:13 a.m]

__: Okay, sounds good because I was thinking maybe we could go for ice cream when you get back. After dinner? miss you too [sent at 11:14 a.m]

You stare at the screen, waiting for a reply.

One minute goes by…

Two minutes…

Three…

Jungkook: Okay, sounds amazing. But why not before dinner? The place we like closes early on Sundays. I love you! [sent at 11:17 a.m]

Oh shoot, that’s right. You and Junkook have gone to the same ice cream shake since you first started dating. The couple who run it are super sweet, only a decade older. How could you forget?

__: I’m a dummy, yes we’ll go before dinner. I love you too [sent at 11:18 a.m]

Jungkook: Noo, you’re not a dummy! But okay, I’ll see you soon! [sent at 11:19 a.m]

Rejuvenated, you turn off your phone, jump off your art stool and crank the current song up–Runaway by Bon Jovi. Let’s see, you think, tearing a piece of watercolor paper from your drawing pad, what to do.

When the idea strikes you prepare water, paintbrushes, your palette, and anything else you may need for the next five hours give or take. You snatch your phone again and scroll through your photo gallery, hoping to get a good reference photo.

Your best friend’s birthday was two weeks away and she’s been subtly hinting for a painting of her, her fiancee’, and her dog Bear. As her closest friend and well-practiced artist, you think it is best to appease her request.

Jungkook comes home at 4 pm on the dot. Not a minute later. He looks happy, you conclude. Genuinely happy. It looks good on him.

“__!” Jungkook runs through the front door and lifts you up in his arms. He spins you around and you place your hands on his shoulders. This is so unexpected but nice.

“Jungkook,” you struggle to catch your breath. “What’s going on?”

“I just love coming home to you.” He places you back down and grabs your wrist. “Come on, I wanna stuff you full with ice cream.”

“That sounds so weird,” you laugh.

“Why?” Jungkook opens the front door, ushering you to go ahead of him.

“Because…it sounds like you want to stuff me. Like in a weird way.”

“Woman, that cleared nothing up for me.” You hop into the car with stupid grins on your face. You don’t even know what you mean let alone having to explain to your husband. What can you say, Jungkook makes you a little braindead.

“I just mean that you wanting to stuff me with ice cream sounds like the witch from Hanzel and Gretel. You wanna fatten me up to eat me. Or taxidermy,….or Build a Bear.”

“What the fuck honey,” Jungkook curses, backing out of your drive. “Did you get into something funky while I was gone?”

“No what–ugh never mind.” You stare out the window, arms crossed and biting back the need to giggle uncontrollably. Why were you so giddy right now?

Jungkook glances over with amusement. He knows you’re inches away from balling over with laughter. “You know what honey?”

“Hmm?”

“I think instead of stuffing you full of ice cream, I’m gonna stuff you full with something just as good.”

“Don’t say it Kook, don’t. I’m going to bust a gut.” You beg fully aware he’s not about to back down.

“My fucking cawk,” he says, making sure to exaggerate the last part.

You throw a hand over your mouth, tears well up in your eyes and this time, they’re not sad ones.

You pull up at the small, but charming ice cream stand at around 4:20 pm. It’s a decent crowd tonight.

You and Jungkook get out of the car with laced hands. You’ve managed to calm down now, thankfully. As you make your way to the line a small voice catches both your attention.

“Appa!” A little girl with blue ribbons in her hair runs past you. She looks between eight to ten years old. You and Jungkook follow her movement as she leaps up into her father’s arms.

You smile at the interaction. Her father kisses her cheek and chuckles as she shows him her ribbons. She looks like she’s telling a very eventful story.

Beside you, Jungkook stiffens. His eyes set on the pair but you’re unsure what he’s thinking. “Kook?” you say, but he doesn’t respond. You shake his hand, the one laced in yours, but still no response. It’s when you step in front of his view that you get him back.

“Hey,” you say. “Are you okay?”

Jungkook blinks at you and shakes his head a bit. “I’m good, sorry. Not sure what happened there. Must be a bit out of it today. Let’s go get some ice cream.”

A/N: I like this series vv much...thank you to anyone reading :) Lmk your thoughts and if you wanna be tagged comment or send me an ask!

Taglist:

@frieschan @oldermenluverrr @tatamicc @kookswifesblog @llallaaa @sunnybyeol @namtaeh @exactlygreatcoffee @whipwhoops @yoongisducky @ktnj91 @junecat18 @thvlover7 @yoongiworshiper

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[bigjbonk]

HI!!!! I found you through ex machina!!! I would sell my bones for more of it. It is SO GOOD. i understand if you dont plan on writing more of homestead, but please, tell us what was gonna happen next !!!!! (If you had an outline already, if not its ok)

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa that's a pretty huge compliment, thank you!!!

Homestead, Homestead, Homestead. It isn't that I don't want to write it, really. It's just that the tf2 fixation is dormant at the moment, and has been for a while. And at the time I didn't like writing Melissa lol. I do wanna write more of it, but the issue is that right now I have stuff I wanna do MORE, and that list is always growing. My creative process is kinda just. You know. Hoarding WIPs that I'll "work on later." 😂

I was an even less disciplined writer back then than I am now, so I kind of just had some loosely connected ideas that I would write whenever I ended up feeling like it. So, seeing as at this point the most likely way I'll get back to Homestead is after an Ex Machina rewrite (and who knows if/when I'll get to that), sure, I'll share some ideas I had for Homestead under the readmore. Hypothetical spoilers below.

For starters, Engie is sterile. He and Melissa wanted children, but didn't find out until later that Engie couldn't have kids. It's why there was a room in the house that didn't match the rest, it's why Engie immediately latched onto the idea of caring for Mal (and partially why he didn't always have the best instincts even when his intentions were good; no practice), and it's why Melissa was initially REALLY uncomfortable with the fact that he'd "built a son in all but name."

Speaking of Melissa, she definitely didn't like Mal. She's seen enough of Engie's craft to know it's sound. But this is the first time he's (as far as she knows the situation) BUILT A GUY. Inspired by a coworker or not, that's weird. That might even make it weirder. It doesn't help that she barely gets to see her husband, and now he's brought home what might as well be his artificial kid, and barely pays her any mind because he's so set on advancing the robot's AI and teaching it ABCs. Melissa wouldn't resort to outright sabotage, because she loves her husband more than life itself, but she DOES inadvertently start a petty rivalry with Mal (if a slightly lopsided one) because frankly, she WOULD prefer that darned robot gone. Even if she wouldn't overtly say so.

I was kind of hoping for her and Mal to eventually warm up to each other, but considering Melissa's visceral distrust, and Mal's tendency to be either terrified or vindictive when wronged, to this day I'm not sure what would have spurred them to make up. I think I was just gonna keep writing as I go until an idea came up that kinda felt right.

I'm pretty sure that was it for actual plot stuff. There wasn't a whole bunch, seeing as Homestead was meant as a sort of drabble collection anyway, with a string of AU canon to tie them together. But here's some other random ideas I had for themes and chapters and stuff!

Mal really would find a horse. It wouldn't be HIS horse, but it would be a big enough horse for him to hop on and then IMMEDIATELY realize he didn't know how to ride one. No horses would be harmed in the making of that chapter.

Mal learning about sign language, and wanting to learn it. It would be difficult, seeing as he has three fused fingers and a face that can't emote, but it's close enough to what he and M-146 did that he would want to try.

Engie upgrading Mal's pattern recognition software so that it could run fast enough for him to enjoyably watch cartoons, simply because it bothered Mal that he couldn't make anything out in animated material. He would immediately swear off almost all of it for a variety of reasons (he ends up not really liking slapstick or fantasy violence, for starters), but he would quickly become hooked on shows like Scooby Doo whenever his cooking show wasn't on.

Engie would also work on de-noising his speaker system because Scout would call sometimes, and talking to a robot whose voice is 80% grain is a nightmare over the phone.

Speaking of Scout calling, Engie tended to always get surprised immediately after a call because Mal would have learned like 20 new words, and would have more varied intonation for words he already had. By the time the fic ended, Mal would have been capable of nearly flawless speech, and his intonation and even accent would become startlingly different from Scout's. And no, Engie would never fully get used to it. XD

There was gonna be a chapter of July 4th. That was uhhhhhhhhh gonna be how Engie learned Mal had pretty severe PTSD. This would have led to some newfound understanding of Mal's prior behavior, and that awareness would have in turn led to better management of— and workarounds to— Mal's anxiety. Not using certain power tools in his vicinity, for example, or slowly introducing him to stimuli that he found stressful in other contexts. (I'm no expert in how PTSD is managed, and at that age I DEFINITELY wasn't, so like, I would inform readers not to take my approach as like, a PTSD tutorial fjdkdjddhdj)

Once Mal had the words for it, he would reveal his favorite colors were yellow and green. He wouldn't want to be repainted, but he WOULD start occasionally wearing clothes about it.

Mal likes watching Engie work, but should NEVER be expected to help beyond handing him tools. (Engie learns why after the July 4th incident, when Mal has the words to share some of his backstory. Which got loosely addressed in a side fic because I literally retconned his origin like halfway through Ex Machina lol whoops)

I toyed with the idea of Mal making friends so that he wasn't 100% dependent on Engie at all times forever and ever. But I never came up with anyone, nor the circumstances for how he would even meet them when he barely gets to leave the house.

Mal eventually learns he likes to draw. He's not good at it by any stretch of the word, but he likes it.

Anything else I could put here would be me coming up with modern ideas, but these were some of the thoughts and themes I had in mind when I was first writing Homestead. Or at least the ones I could remember; there's a notebook somewhere that had a few ideas listed, but I have no clue where that is lol.

[madness-in-the-flesh]

Hear you like dark themes huh? Let me rub my hands together mischievously rq as I hand you this. Go as crazy as you want man. Also the Deimos and Gil prompts were peak perfection!

Reader knew Hoffnar for a long time, but was unbeknownst of his hidden obsession over them. But after taking a wellness check on him after the fall of Navada, they learn the hard way of what he's become. Hoffnar Tricky will no longer hide who he is. He only wants one thing right now and one thing only. Now Reader is running for their life through the lost city being chased by something undead, practically eldritch. It's all downhill the moment they took a wrong turn and find nowhere left to run.

Regardless of what you write I can't wait to see more of what you do!

Okay first off thank you !!!!!!! Hoping you enjoy my stuff in future as much as I love making it !!!!! +D and second, I am taking this request. Shoving it in between two slices of bread and eating it. Delicious. Thank you. Also if you mean by taking a wrong turn, You breaking your legs and being unable to escape. yes. wrong turn. Also, maybe got a LITTTLLLLE carried away and this is around 3195 words but shhh it's fine. I also apologize if this wasn't the stuff you wanted? I don't know I just kinda blanked and kept getting ideas. then deleting a part. then coming up with more ideas and re-writing, So eh, Not as happy with this as the other ones but regardless I hope you enjoy ! +)

Categorizing this under fics rather than a drabble. Or maybe all my drabbles class themselves as fics since I feel they're longer than what others consider drabbles? Idk if anyone has advice that would be appreciated <3 !!!!

Tricky - Run Rabbit Run

GENRE - Romantic

TRIGGER WARNINGS - Physical Violence, Gun Violence, Wounds, broken bones, Murder / implied Murder, Mention of controlling behaviour, Descriptions of gore, Heights / falling ( more so falling in this case ) - If you believe I've missed anything please let me know so I can add it

You wandered through the ruins of the once prospering city under the rule of Director Phobos. This place held both fond and lukewarm memories, mixing into a deep sense of nostalgia but that’s not the feeling you came for. No, you had your sights set on something a lot more important. 

Ever since the place had fallen to ruin, You’d been hiding out, searching from place to place without contact with any of your old colleagues until setting up your own little home away from everything. You just wanted to live a normal life, which you did. Well, as normal as you could in a place like Nevada. With the occasional Zed’s appearing and some agents here and there: You mostly stuck to yourself from growing your own food ( which was miraculous within itself ) and your limited self defence training, You were set. 

It never stopped the empty feeling of misery. You even began to doubt that the quote “ misery loves company ” held up. After all, Could your life be so Gloomy while your social life was so barren? So much so you’d begin talking to yourself as well as the photos that lined your wall. Mostly of your three colleagues. Dr Crackpot: Intense and confident, You couldn’t recall a dull moment with him but you also found it hard to keep up. Especially with his rivalry with Dr. Jebediah Christoff. Another man you grew close with while working with under the Nexus Core. He was but neither of those two were the closest. 

Dr Hofnarr. At first, He was timid and the two of you didn’t interact too much. You both stuck to yourselves until you both decided to have lunch with Christoff but according to him, You two would get along and oh boy, did you. After finding a similar interest in clowns: it was almost all the two of you would discuss. From Bozo the Hysterical and Slapstick Stanley: you’d take about anything slightly resulting among the jester-y. However, as things went on you discovered more about each other and the things you enjoyed outside of clowns. Soon enough you’d say the two of you were best friends: Something that you least expected from a job the ones put out by the Nexus Core. You never agreed with the inhumane and horrid things that happened but  kept up with it because in the end, it was you or them. Yet when you got a mysterious note from someone during office hours, a day before the city’s destruction telling you to run and never look back. You knew exactly who had sent it from the handwriting and why you needed to leave the city almost immediately and without question. You had put that much trust in Hofnarr.

Sure… he’d act weird sometimes towards you but you had always coughed it up to him either not fully grasping the appropriate social response. Then there was the time he had you transferred to work under him, a measly request but you just assumed he thought you were a good fit to help him with his job. That was all it could be, and it was nice working with a friend. Even if he could be semi-controlling to both you and others around you while working. Then according to Jeb, He never acted this way around other things, only with you. Each time though, you brushed it off, almost developing an equally horrible dependency on each other. But that’s all it was, a friendship ( to you, anyways ) that was nothing more than a mutual bond with no ill intent whatsoever. 

Part of you regrets leaving all the same, Maybe you just assumed that you’d encounter each other again whether it be here or the next life. Perhaps even in the other place. Either way, You still longed to be with the people you once saw as your buddies… Especially Hofnarr. You missed having the socially awkward but easily excitable colleague, always anticipating your next conversation but you suppose the next one would never come. You longed to one day hopefully see the way he’d light up as the two of you would meet up for your break. Those were good times… 

So much so you decided to throw away the advice he had given you and perform what would make most Nevadans grimace, especially when you had such a good thing going. Return to the city and perform a wellness check. Not that you knew the location of Hoffnar nor any of your old friends but it wouldn't hurt to try. 

You had the chance to get those back though and you refused to pass it up. So much so you managed to access a forgotten database.  Back in your time with the Nexus core, they had given all the “ important ” employees’ aka the scientists actually working on the distress signals Incase of an emergency which would be loaded onto a database to keep track, this was so that anyone went “ missing '' through their own means or taken hostage. Before leaving, You had removed it from yourself and left it in your office. You suppose it was another way for the director to be in control, Knowing where you were most of the time allowed for him to keep track and snuff out anyone he labelled suspicious. From what you’d read, a signal had been picked up in the city: A signal that you had assumed had been long lost. One that belonged to Hofnarr. The past week, Signals of Dr Hofnarr’s were sent out which read he was still in the. In different locations too which made you almost squirm with delight. Both Crackpot’s and Jeb’s hadn’t been sighted in years. 

You had barely been able to get everything together to head to the city to find him. Maybe he knew where the others were? Just as long as you didn’t have to sit and think about the alienation you felt in your own home. It was around a 3 day trip to the city, With rest. You chose to mostly travel at night, In hopes of avoiding the masses that inhabited the Nevadan wasteland and the A.A.H.W. You did! For the most part, You had a run in with some bandits around the border but nothing you couldn’t handle! You were surprised on how the blood and guts didn’t phase you anymore. Maybe if it were your own...

The brains splattered on the ground and all you could think was: “ Wow! I can’t wait to tell Hofnarr about what I’ve been up too”. Maybe if you had kept up-to-date with everything going on around you, rather than becoming a hermit with limited news. You might have even thought twice about stepping back into the city but alas, absence makes the heart grow fonder. The same could be said about the both of you. 

Checking the destination you’d marked on the map of the city, Colt 1911 secured in your hip. Your hands were shaky as hysteria ripped through you. Trying to keep yourself contained from all the excitement as you finally rounded the corner. Staring up at the eerily spray painted building. It’s like everything fell quiet when you did hear it 

The distant yells from bandits were no longer audible. The ripping of flesh that as Zed’s bit into whatever poor sucker stumbled across them and backed up by the things aching pleas to live. Not even gunshots whirred through the air: Just eerie, well placed silence. 

For the first time since you received that signal but not as long as you’d have liked to. Your pondering was cut short when the faint sound of a tune rang through the air. You perked up, looking around, cringing as it crept ever closer. You were in the middle of the street, no cover and hardly supposed you’d find some in the time whatever was making the melody would get here. All you had was the handgun on you. Pulling out the Colt 1911 and shoving the map back into your pocket. You awaited, staring off into the street’s opening. 

But the thing never came around the corner. Alternatively, you were greeted by the presence of the music right by your ears and a hot breath on the back of your neck, causing you to dart around. 

Your blood ran cold and heart rate quicken, a blanket of trepidation fell over you and did not let go. Bright red eyes stared out at you from the holes of the mask it wore, only inches from your face. Unmoving, and as redder than the Nevadan sky. You didn’t dare move but the grip on the gun grew more strained. Clammy palms clasping for anything to keep you anchored to the situations, You couldn't allow your mind to race in this sort of predicament. 

The most haunting thing is those cardinal eyes screamed of familiarity but you swore you’d remember such a sight. His skin was rotting away at the bone, A sign the person in front of you was no longer alive. Nevertheless, he wasn’t attacking you like the traditional Zed would nor making any move to harm you. The thing seemed to be studying you as you did it. Glancing down at the sign in the things hand, bloody. You were also sure you’d spotted pieces of flesh and brain tissue. The most obnoxious thing was the boombox playing what seemed like such a simple fun tune. Just what the fuck was this shit playing at?

You decide you've seen enough, Moving to take a step back but today was just full of surprises. You jolted as an ear piercing. It sounded like someone was scratching a record, Yet it was forming words as easily as you could. 

“ CLOWN KNOWS YOU !!! ” It beamed out, seemingly unphased by the fear written all over your face. You quickly decided you wouldn’t be dealing with it any longer, Pulling up the Cole 1911 and shooting it in the torse, almost emptying the ammo cartridge. Your hand was shaky, at least 3 of the 5 hitting: Which left 2 bullets in the chamber. The Red haired being was unphased and still standing, It didn’t even flinch as it was shot, rather, the clown just stared at you, holding your gaze until it looked down at its body. Pressing it’s hand in on the wounds, squirting the blood out of the laceration. Poking and prodding before looking back up at you. The thing began to go from twitching on occasion to convulsing violently with what you could only presume was rage. It leaked from the Zed and into the atmosphere around the two of you, Anger and tension so you wasted no time getting the fuck out of there. AS you turned and zipped around the corner. The music stopped with a thud and another blaring screech. 

You wasted no time, pulling the map you’d once shoved into your pocket and running through the empty streets. Even now the only thing you could hear was your footsteps and own breath, heaving as your feet pounded against the pavement. Not daring to look behind you. It’s like all life in the area had gotten the fuck out of there once they realized. You couldn't keep up with your own thoughts since apparently this clown could outrun them too, pulling up your side as the clown’s legs outran your own: Long and almost cartoonishly stretching along the pavement beside you. You didn’t waste time attempting to once more shoot the clown, but both shots missed as the whiplash caused by the gun as it fired caused your aim to fly back too. Without much thought, You smacked the thing square in the head, bashing it’s head and causing it to trip. You huffed as it stared back at you, still running and taking the left as planned. Spinning around the corner and gazing at the apartment building to your right. 

You didn’t stop as you turned down the alleyway and rushing up the steps leading to each apartment's patio and then to the roof. You pulled yourself up each one and looked down for a moment to see where the clown was, hoping to have lost the thing by running up the building. Instead, you caught sight of a sign tearing through the ground: The same sign that the clown had been holding. It seemed to pop it’s head out and stare at you from below. You flinched as the clown pointed at you, beginning to screech once again. 

“ haha fuck you ” you said to no one in particular but with no haste as you continued upwards and onto the roof of the building. That’s… what sort of thing is able to do that? Nothing you’d known of. Grabbing to take another look towards the map then up, Making the route in your head.

If you jumped a couple buildings over, You’d be able to possibly be able to climb down another’s fire exit and make it to the sewer. Seeing it as a lot safer than travelling on the surface with whatever this thing happened to be on your tale. Sure, You wouldn’t have a clue where you were going but via working of the map: You’d probably be able to decipher where you would roughly be. You didn’t get your degree for nothing, after all. 

You couldn’t contemplate the plan for much longer though, as you watched the shadow appear over your head and crawl across your sight from behind: You shoved the map back into your side bag and whipped your head around to see the thing around 6 ft off the ground and above you. You broke into a jog, cursing loudly as you felt yourself stumble as you got to the first ledge. It wasn’t a far jump but falling would definitely result in a nasty injury. One you didn't need right now. You leaped, For a second, You felt yourself falling, arms flying up . No ground keeping you in place, almost floating. But gravity pulled you back down, accompanied by the loud thud. 

Stumbling once more, you continued to run across the next rooftop, being careful not to . You made sure not to look behind you: On the verge of a breakdown at how stressed your mind was with all the clown had made, defying every physics was gnawing your brain into possible mush but you had to push forward, You could think about the fact of a flying murder clown later, now all that mattered was how far you could jump between buildings. Skidding onto the side of a ledge and turning, You ran up the side and sprung once more. You continued for another two buildings before there was any comeuppance. You jumped, however upon misjudging just how much air you would have needed to jump, it caused you to land and fall against the building. 

You quickly scuffled and gripped onto the building's edge. Clawing at the cornice as you panicked. You held on as tightly as you could, looking around for anything that could help. Only to be greeted by the thing that had been chasing you, Jolting out of shock. It was now above you glancing at your fingers only to look back at you. The colour drained from your face as you knew exactly what this fucker was planning 

“ Don’t you FUCKING dare! ” You felt yourself yell at it, Only for it to tilt it’s head innocently. Like a child who’d been plotting a mischievous deed for the day, except this wasn’t innocent in the slightest. The feeling of the clown putting it’s hands on yours, The feeling of it’s skin was cold, deprived from all signs of life but from this angle: You could catch how it looked from under the mask. 

From the gore, you could tell it was missing the skin from it’s mouth, Cheeks and lips torn clean off but the teeth weren’t damaged at all. When alive, they were clearly kept in good condition. Something glossy caught your eye before you could fully let the creature help remove all your fingers from the ledge. You froze up, staring in absolute horror as you soon came to realise just who the man before you is… or was… You didn’t think there was a semblance left of him now. Could there be when he’d most likely been alone for so long? Well there was one, unbeknownst you were that one piece. There person with his twisted mind never failed to forget. A root to a problem 

“ Hofnarr… buddy? ” You spoke, choosing your words carefully but it was too late. The thing had picked off all your fingers and you began to fall. It felt just like how it had been a split second except now the ground wouldn’t catch you for 1 second more. You couldn’t find the words to scream out of fear. The man you’d missed for what felt like decades, was right in front of you and you didn’t even pick up on it until you were literally dangling of the edge of a fucking building. Staring up at Hofnarr as you felt yourself tearing through the air. Even once you landed, a sickening crack in both your legs and your head slamming back into something hard. The ground wasn’t as fucked as you thought it would be. 

Finally finding your lungs as you screeched in pain as the ringing in your head began. You couldn't even think about looking down to where your legs were broken, bone out of place and piercing through the skin and beginning to bleed. The back of your head was already moist with your own plasma and it hurt to think. You shook as well as finding it hard to breathe, your brain partly fuzzy but filled with that pulsating ringing. You couldn’t focus on anything but the pain. Barely registering the fact that the remains of Hoffnar jumped down from the building and was slowly making his way over to you. Humming the tune that was playing earlier to himself. You whimpered and cried, unable to do anything else. 

You suppose whatever grunt that had placed so many bin bags filled with rotting rubbish wouldn’t have guessed it would be saving a life, But part of you was glad. Another part of you wished that your brains had been splattered against the concrete. Still, you suppose that maybe he wouldn’t have let you fall if he didn’t know about it. Or would he? 

You couldn’t tell but you could hear the soft giggles of your used-to-be friend, Cuddling next to you in the bin pile, snuggling into you. Almost purring into your neck. You didn’t have the strength to fight him off, Just laying and trying to process the pain as well as the fact that the man now cradling you like a baby, was your old pal Hofnarr.

“ Mine… You are MINE!! ” The voice called out, Still scratchy and unbearable to the ears. It only caused the pain to get worse, whimpering as the clown continued to nuzzle and purr into your neck. 

You were fucked.

[thrilling-oneway]

Your predictions for the next events have gotten me thinking about it now so here's some stuff that may not be relevant at all but who knows;

The Shinonomes haven't had an event yet this year and I doubt either of them are getting the next unit focuses so Akito may be likely?

Mafuyu and Ena's second mixed events both happened during September last year, so Nightcord are in need of another character getting one. Kanade feels more likely at this point (set up for next N25 arc?)

There is one character from each unit who hasn't had a mixed event since 2020/2021. Emu just had an event so it won't be her but Saki, Minori, Akito and Mizuki are all likely assuming that's how the mixed events work. My guess is that it'll be Akito, Mizuki/Kanade and Saki as focuses. Alternatively Nene gets one instead of Saki so each unit is only left with one character without a second mixed event. Nene/Saki are most likely the anniversary focus though.

However Nene and Mizuki have been fairly popular in mixed events this year (Nene more than Mizuki. NY, Valentine's, ShihoAn and 1-B event all have Nene in the event bonus lineup) so if that makes any difference I'm going with Akito, Kanade and Saki. I have no clue how this stuff works though.

Yeah Akito I think could very easily be one of the mixed events and the fact that he is so desperate for a stamp means at the very least he should be a 4* on one of the events next month. If he isn't the banner character then that means he's probably the White Day banner because he's the only dude without a second mixed event rn.

There's slots for 7 unit events before the end of the year, assuming the november lim slot is a unit banner again (not a stretch since it has been for 2 years running). So by that it's possible that they could slip in 2 events. Ena's very likely to get a banner so she might actually be the first one back. Aside from that one time with Honami no one's really gone that far over a year without a banner (usually like 13 months max). Ena did get 3 events last year this is probably payback for that. Like how Emu got 2 events in a small timespan this year to make up for going a year without anything.

I worked this all out in my head and we should finish rotation 4 in the event before White Day event (assuming we have one).

Kanade mixed event I could see. Maybe with Mafuyu and Honami? Makes sense plot-wise. Mizuki I'm hesitant on though since they have quite a few cards right now (I'm using this as a guide). Actually on second thought Honami has the most cards so maybe take her off but I could definitely see knmf-centric mixed event. Maybe not Mafuyu c

Yeah, anniversary event is either Saki or Nene there's no other way about it. You've got Emu, Mizuki, Saki, Akito, Minori, An, Kanade and Nene to pick from. Knock off everyone who's been on an anniversary banner and has 5 lims and you're left with Emu, Saki and Nene. Emu just got a banner so she's probably off the table too. I think Nene might be slightly more likely, because even though she's gone less time since her last mixed event, mixed events don't seem to care about timing, and also Saki just was featured on Slapstick Cafe, so I think Ichika has a higher chance of being the L/n anniversary lim.

That is the one thing that bothers me about the Nene banner is how she's been spammed so much on events this year. I guess it could be Saki banner with Emu lim. We'll see.

I like the odds on that Kanade and Akito though.

Also Minori has way less cards than everyone else in the game rn because of how infrequently she appears on mixed events so expect to see her pop up as probably a 4* and a 2*. And maybe a lim at some point. I'm still considering the possibility of a minoshizu fes but it kinda screws with the event schedule bc of the fact that Haruka will probably be 4* on the anniversary event at the same time. Yeah I think Kaimei is still more likely ignore that. Minori lim will probably be a thing in October then unless they just throw it all out the window and do unit reps anniversary event again.

[conchshell]

So I've just finished ep2 and I have many thoughts that I can't put into words right now

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

The way you draw is so bingus honestly I’m not sure how to describe it

It’s like you made the characters out of silly putty and then like squished them ever so slightly

It’s kind of like Ed Edd and Eddie, and Courage the Cowardly Dog? Those shows where each frame was detailed and kind of, like, fuckin’ stretchy. No bones, only EMOTION.

And like, it’s twisted somehow. Idk if that’s what you’re going for - it could just be that I personally find that sort of style mildly unsettling. But the emotional intensity of the stories you tell combined with the vibe-oriented pseudo-anatomy makes it feel dimly like a bad dream. One of the ones where the emotion is sadness and not fear, the ones where you can’t go home.

It’s very distinctive. I like it a lot.

SILLY PUTTY!!!!

I honestly love that description.

"it's not that I don't know how bodies work. All my characters are canonly made of playdough"

PERFECT! GHFHFHHFF

As a kid I didn't like Edd, Ed and Eddy cus the art style hurt my sensitive eyes, with all the wiggly lines and I found it super hard to relate to any of the cast of the culdesac. I'm sure there are kids like that, but in my friend group, I couldn't relate to anyone on a base level and didn't find many of the jokes that funny that I couldnt get from other shows at the time.

As a kid I was a little picky thing and I tended to hate cartoons that strictly focused on "real kids" or "real people" boring if it didn't have a fantastical element to it. Like... I hated Hey Arnold, As told by Ginger, Proud Family and Doug as a kid.... But loved Danny Phantom, American Dragon, Jackie Chan Adventures, Avatar the Last Airbender, Pokemon Indigo League and Life as a Teenage Robot if that makes sense? Lol

(I know the Eds is WAY more cartoony and zany then the other shows I listed. But my child brain lumped them together as "real people doing boring things" shows for some reason)

Somehow the Eds was always on TV and I ended up watching it when nothing else was on, but I really didn't like the show as a kid. lol

I appreciate the style and show a lot more now. I do remember really loving the movie finale as a kid however. Probably because it was the most plot driven episode in the series with actual stakes and conflict. And I think it was the first time in the series history where characters cried and it wasn't played for comedy. (To my memory)

As I said, I appreciate these shows a lot more now, but the style of the Eds still hurts my eyes.

Courage the Cowardly Dog however was completely my jam. As a child, I would watch anything with dogs in it. Even if it was bad. Scooby-Doo, Krypton, Martha Speaks, Blues Clues, Clifford... If there was a dog, I was down. (I guarantee I would have watched paw patrol if it was in the 90s/early 2000s)

And I remember having fun times watching Courage with my Mom on week day afternoons.

I was always fascinated with things that were scary or a little bit creepy. I remember also loving the heck out of Hunchback of Notre Dame when I was eight and would burn out my VHS so bad.

So Courage comes up with it's creepy themes and halarious running jokes (honestly, rewatching that show as an adult, you can tell they phone in jokes a lot of the time. The running jokes are super abundant to the point I wonder if the actors recorded one take and they kept reusing it just cus it made them laugh. Cries in lack of bonus features on the collectors dvd.)

Courage was the perfect amount of slapstick and horror. Kinda like a modern day Scooby-Doo of it's time (which I also loved) just without the bland predictable mystery element. (I can't believe it took us till 2022 to get that Scooby-Doo and Courage crossover, even if it was a little lame lol)

The show also taught me a lot about the value of courage as an anxiety-ridden kid.

Courage not being the absence of fear, but the boldness to press on despite your fears.

And Courage's over the top screaming and most of the 'Monsters' of the week having their own motivation for doing what they did, made me a little less scared I like to think. Most of the monsters in Courage were never strictly "evil". Every one of them tended to have misguided morals or ethics and Courage had to stop them because their actions would result in them kidnapping Mariel or hurting his family. (Some of them were just pure evil...but that was super rare. Like even the "return the slab" guy just wants his land/tablet back that was taken from him. )

Idk. Even now I think that's pretty cool. And even if Courage is a super formulic show, I still adore it to this day.

Anyways.... I rambled too long about cartoons I had growing up. Hfhfgdgd

But yes. All my characters are made of puddy. Thank you.

[kandyrezi]

4 the character thing <3

song i associate with them: Chlomaki

favorite thing about them: her entire character progression honestly? how she went from being a meek and obedient servant for god to being a carefree and letting her joviality shine without needing to hide any parts of herself, and how much she enjoys the freedom and being who she actually wants to be. i just have a lot of feels about her haha...

least favorite thing about them: pls be nicer to the sea creatures!

favorite line: "Hey, so, uh, why's there a moon underwater?" (to wadanohara) it's not even a moon so it's kinda funny

brOTP: Chlomaki & her familiars as one big fam <3

OTP: Lobco x Chlomaki 5ever💕💖💗 ...even if i never talk about them anymore :') hah mayhaps in the future again...

nOTP: i only really ship her, out of her familiars, with lobco - so i guess i prefer her having a platonic/familial bond with them

random headcanon: Chlomaki can turn fruits poisonous (but poison as a whole is one of her specialties when it comes to magic).

unpopular opinion: I do not think Chlomaki is intentionally "cruel" or "a bitch" like i've seen people describe her as. her casual slapstick and slightly less than pleasant attitude most likely stem from her time in land of clouds where she was literally tortured/abused and never allowed to ask questions/act out against the norm. it's a little more nuanced but that's basically the short version of how I feel about it

song i associate with them: stupid intruders (the vincent black shadow)

stupid intruders came and ruined an empty space I don't know why I bother fronting a nice face, it's fake I took a test and found out things that I knew before it's all genetic that I find you a huge bore

favorite picture of them:

(ponytail chlo!! 💕💕)

[deeafrotailmisstress]

I don't know if anyone asked you some Troll OC Asks, but since you made such a dope list, how's about 34-38 :D

AAAAAHH THANK YOU SO MUCH!! 💖💖💖💖💖I honestly didn’t think they would get as popular as they did haha, but thank you guys so much for sharing and reblogging it, it really means so much! 💖Anywho, onto the questions! I’ll answer these ones for Jaz xD

34. Does your OC have a mate? Have they ever performed a mating ritual? 

Ah. Jaz’s love life, the ever complicated story that it is. I’mma keep it short. xD

Jazali used to have a mate named Karshii, but because of a very violent event that caused for a very heavy argument and a series of heavily insulting jabs later, they mutually decided to split. They both haven’t seen each other since.

They both...technically had a mating ritual. They knew that both their parents wouldn’t approve, they got mated very young, and so they got a priest to meet them at a secret location and officiate their mating ceremony and allow the loas to approve their joining. It was very small and it barely constituted as an official ritual at the time, but it still counts. Jazali still even wears her “wedding” ring to this day and if you ask her why, she probably couldn’t give you a straight answer.

35. Does your OC believe in a ‘mate for life’? Do they practice monogamy or polygamy?

Jazali does believe in a mate for life, and not just because of what she was taught. She would prefer to have that one person who she knows she could rely on wherever and in whatever situation she may be and once she has set her eye on somebody, she doesn’t see anybody else as an option. Jazali is not as frivolous as most trolls and isn’t really comfortable with the idea of actively pursuing romantic partners for the fun of it due to her upsetting experience in the past. That isn’t to say that she is against polygamy! Growing up with a mother who would often have many romantic partners, as well as the polygamous nature of trolls, it isn’t a strange concept for her! But due to her inability to trust one person, let alone many, with being that close to her, meant that she would rather stick to being with one person and trust them wholly. 

36. Do they have any preferences for a significant other such as: physical attributes? Personality? What type of troll he/she/they are/is? 

Jazali doesn’t really have a specific list of characteristics that she likes in a person; she has shown a preference for larger peeps or people with nice hair or deep voices, but outside of that, it’s really all about their personality. An essential for Jazali is you gotta have some sense of humor. If you are a stick in the mud or a party-pooper, then that is a no-no, since Jazali is an avid lover of puns and pranks and slapstick comedy. She also appreciates someone who isn’t too arrogant or self-absorbed, since most cocky douchebags just remind her of her oldest brother, who doesn’t bring up the fondest of memories. Does she have a troll race preference? Eh, not really. I mean, she has developed a fondness for Amani, but outside of that, no tribe is a favourite for her.

37. How does your OC handle being in heat? Are they more tolerable of it than other trolls? How long would you say the cycle is? Do you as the creator/mune believe your troll goes through heat? 

“So...you have heat...but you don’t go through heat?”

Jazali dragged a hand over her face with a tired groan. Why did she agree to help this googly eyed elf again. The darkspear quickly yanked up her fishing net onto the shore while Fellious, the ginger shaggy haired elven scholar, sat on a boulder with a couple of dried up corals on it, writing down notes in his book while staring curiously at Jazali.

“It...it be a bit more complicated than that elfy.” Jazali tried to explain with a scratch to the back of her neck.

Fellious finally noticed Jaz’s rather embarrassed expression and quickly added “I-if you are not comfortable discussing it, I do not mind Miss Jazali.”

“Okee first off,” Jazali chuckled with a shake of her head “Errytime ya calls me ‘Miss Jazali’, I be waitin for a gobbo mech wid a bow tie ta come outta nowhere an’ gimme some champagne. Jaz or Jazali be fine.”

The little troll walked further into the sea to grab another net, grunting as she continued “An’ second, I promised I’d help ya wid questions an’ Jaz don’ make broken promises so I gonna answers ya.”

Fellious tried not to look eager, but his hand rested just an inch above the paper with his quill, waiting. Jaz stomped back into the shore with her net in hand as she thought out loud “It...it ain’ dat I nevah been t’rough heat, it jus’ dat it don’ happen ta me as much ‘cuz I ain’ realleh like, as feverish as odahs...dat make sense?”

The blood elf blinked at her and tilted his head slightly as he tried to process Jazali’s explanation...as well as her accent. He slowly responded “But...heat is a natural cycle that occurs for all trolls...surely it would happen just as strongly and regularly for you?”

“Well yeah but…” Jazali let out a long sigh as she finally let go of the net and placed her hands onto her hips, tapping her foot with pursed lips as she thought hard about how she could explain it.

“Okee.” The little troll clapped her hands together “Y’know how ya get hungry an’ ya instincts tell ya ta eat?”

Fellious was not sure where Jazali was going with this explanation, but he simply nodded his head and raised a brow “Yes…”

“Wantin’ ta be mated is kinda like a real, physical hunger fer some people yeh? Even elfies!” Jazali gestured an arm towards the blood elf with an unsure smile on her face.

Said blood elf simply narrowed his eyes further and continued to nod slowly “...maybe?”

Jazali shrugged and scratched the back of her head as she continued “Well...I rarely been hungry like dat.”

“But you said-”

Jazali held up both her hands and corrected herself “Yes, I know, I did tells ya I been mated befo’. But even then we both didn’ even smoosh booties on dat same night. Me an’...my ex...didn’ even do it until weeks later. Jaz...ain’ realleh sure how ta explain it, ‘cuz I ain’ even too sure why I be feelin’ dis way either, but if I evah DO need it, it gotta be wid somebody I know fo’ sure I can trust.”

When Jazali saw poor Fellious still looking rather confused, she sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose before going back to her previous example “Like I said. I rarely be hungry like dat. I suppose I COULD eat, and it ain’ like I can’t taste it or admire da meal...but mah instincts don’ tell me to do it to live or nothin’. Ya feel me?”

He was patiently listening to her explanation and when she finished, Fellious finally raised both brows and replied “Huh...I guess I never thought of it that way. So you...never appreciate any physical attractiveness?” The blood elf scoffed and smirked “Now that I feel mighty sorry for you”

“Oh hey hey now!” Jazali smirked back and wagged a finger at him “Now jus’ cuz I ain’ hungry don’t mean I don’t enjoy the good company or flavors dat come wid da meal.”

38. Is your OC misogynist/sexist? Do they have an opinion on the position of female trolls in their tribe?

Oh Jazali is not sexist in any way. Considering her mother is one of the strongest huntresses in her tribe, her boss a sexy bad ass female mage, her mentor a female ex-sentinel elven monk warrior and her friend’s boss a kick-ass knowledgeable female witch doctor, the only opinion she would have on female trolls’ position in society is: it’s a high position.

[jackburgos]

Don't You Love Your Mother?

Mother's Day has come and gone, but motherhood is forever. And forever is a long time. Long enough, surely, to drive some people crazy. Chances are your mother was pretty cool, generally speaking. Not everyone's so lucky. For us, celebrating Mother's Day with a list like this one is just what the counselor ordered. Here are...

The 5 Worst Mothers in Horror Film

#5 – The Babadook

I loved this movie. It creeped me out and made me laugh and annoyed the shit out of me—all of which I can appreciate in a film. The characters made me feel things. Sometimes angry things. There were so many times when I wanted to strangle Samuel—played by the very talented Noah Wiseman.

That having been said, I empathize with Amelia (Essie Davis) a bit. Enough to put her at Number 5 on my list. She loves her kid, and she's trying, but shit is hitting the fan, there's a crazy demon in the house, and people keep stressing her out.

Are we done empathizing? Good. Amelia is emotionally abusive, she's volatile, psychotically depressed, and all of this is deeply concerning to me. I was worried for Samuel long before the Babadook got involved, and that's saying something. Amelia needs to see a professional who's comfortable with her cohabitating with a demon. She obviously needs help, but the demon kinda happened. That wasn't her fault, and I'm not blaming her for it.

I give Amelia four rocking chairs out of ten.

#4 – Friday the 13th

I'm actually going to defend a mom for a second, because this poor woman gets both forgotten and shat upon far too often.

We can say a lot of things about Pamela Voorhees (Betsy Palmer; Nana Visitor), including that she's a crazy knife-wielding killer, but we cannot say that she was a bad mom. Jason was born to Pamela when she was only 16. Mind you, this was in 1946. One imagines she was married in a shotgun wedding to her high school boyfriend, given the class ring that she wears on her left ring finger. The point is that Jason was born with a disability, and Pamela did not stay married.

Pamela was overprotective of Jason, but she wasn't domineering. This is evidenced by the fact that she trusted the other camp counselors at Camp Crystal Lake to do their jobs on the day that Jason drowned. The fact that Jason had the temerity to attempt to swim means that Pamela had done a good job making Jason feel empowered, despite his disability. Ironically, if Pamela had been as overbearing as Vera, Jason might have felt too nervous to approach the lake, and this long series of slasher films never would have happened.

I give Pamela two rocking chairs out of ten. She was a fine mom, but she did kill people.

#3 – Braindead (Dead Alive)

This movie had some amazing lines, amazing gore, and was hilarious through and through. If you like slapstick horror, and you haven't seen this movie...I think you might not exist. I'm so sorry.

There is nothing redeemable about the awful Vera Cosgrove (Elizabeth Moody). Everything goes wrong because of her, but she's the kind of person who would probably blame poor Paquita Maria Sanchez (Diana Peñalver) for the fact that she got herself bitten for being where she did not belong—snooping on her suffering son Lionel (Timothy Balme) during a date. Needless to say, the fact that Vera is Patient Zero is no coincidence. This entire film is about individuating from a domineering parent by cutting your way out of her gargantuan womb with a cross. It's a parable is what I'm saying.

I give Vera six rocking chairs out of ten.

#2 – Scream 2

Debbie Salt (Laurie Metcalf) is an awful woman. An awful, awful woman. She's hardly sympathetic when she's introduced to us as a reporter, and she does not become more so.

Debbie's failure as a mother falls largely in the category of neglect. When she learns that her husband has been cheating on her with Sydney Prescott's (Neve Campbell) mother, she leaves him, abandoning her son. Her neglect is a major contributing factor in Billy Loomis's psychosocial development, which leads him to don a ghost mask and start killing people.

Of course it's only after Billy has gotten himself justifiably killed during his murder spree that Debbie returns to town to avenge him. It's too little too late. It doesn't matter how many copycat murders you commit, you're never going to make up for those lost years. Debbie's failure as a mother was minor compared to what she did to make up for it, but neglect is still child abuse.

Debbie gets eight out of ten rocking chairs.

#1 – Carrie

This woman takes the cake. Of all of these mothers, she is the one I would want the least. The manipulative, insidious way in which Margaret White (Piper Laurie; Julianne Moore) commits to covert incest is jaw-dropping.

The religious nature of the abuse makes it especially bad. Margaret uses the Bible to make Carrie feel disgusting, even monstrous, for becoming a woman. Anyone who makes a girl feel bad about her period deserves to experience some excruciatingly gory punishment in a specially brutal ring of hell. A mother who does that deserves a punishment that's slightly worse. Mostly because, as a mother, you know what that's for. You shouldn't shame people about it.

Margaret eventually becomes so zealous in her religious fervor that she decides to save her daughter's soul by killing her. Being forced to become estranged from an abusive parent is bad enough. Being forced to kill your own parent in self-defense? I can't imagine how awful it must have been for Carrie to have been raised in a situation like that. I'm not sure I want to imagine it, to be entirely honest.

Margaret gets ten rocking chairs out of ten rocking chairs. Mama Bates would be proud.