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333dolans · 4 years

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Light Within The Darkness // G.D

Hey loves! This is my first attempt at writing anything for either of the twins so any constructive criticism is welcomed and very much appreciated. I love you!🤍

Summary: After a heated fight with Grayson leads to a cold night alone, an unEXpected and unwelcomed visitor arrives.

Warnings: Mentions of Abuse and Anxiety. ANGSTY with a lil fluff at the end.

“Are you actually taking the piss Y/N?!” Grayson growled, slamming the door to your small, but cozy apartment. You two had been leaving a small cafè in downtown LA when you had ran into an ‘old school friend’, or atleast that’s what you had told Grayson. He didn’t buy it at all of course, he had a talent of always seeing straight through you anytime you lied. He could read you like a book, he had your body language memorised like his favourite tame song and he knew this wasn’t simply an acquaintance from your early teenage years. When he tried to ask simple questions about him, you became very tense and he could see you had began grinding your jaw at the very mention of his existence and the encounter you had just had. you’d began cracking your fingers, a tell tale sign that you were rapidly becoming more and more on edge. He didn’t want to cause an argument from his tendency to always want to know what is going on, his need for control, so he let it slide. Well that was until you crossed paths with mystery man once again. “Two years with no interaction and we see each other twice within a half a hour period? It’s a sign from the universe Y/N, we should get back together haha!” The man joked. You smiled awkwardly, feeling the heat rising within Grayson. You couldn’t tell if it was due to the mans comment, or the fact that you had lied about this man being your most recent ex. It was probably a mixture, you thought to yourself. Grayson turned on his heel and was started off towards the Porsche just a few metres away. You rushed a quick farewell and dashed after your boyfriend.

“Gray can you just let me-” “Y/N. Don’t.” He interrupted. You didn’t dare speak another word until you made it back to your apartment. The car ride was a silent one, something you wasn’t used to in your entire relationship with Grayson. You two were always jamming out to a throwback playlist and singing your hearts out. When you arrived, He made his way across to where you were standing in the living room. “Gray, I’m sorry ok? I didn’t want to make things awkward for you. He’s my ex- boyfriend, it was uncomfortable and I just wanted to diffuse the situation as soon as I possibly could.” You tried to reason. “Don’t you think I was just as uncomfortable probably even more so when I found out he was your ex?! You should of just told me but instead you lied to me.” He argued back. “How could it possibly have been worse for you G? I have so much history with him and things didn’t end well between us. Why are you making this about you? You’re not even considering how I felt, it’s always about you isn’t it?” You whispered the last part, defeatedly. “If it’s ‘always about me’ then maybe I should leave, Wouldn’t want you to be stuck with someone so selfish!” He screamed. You could feel the tears building behind your eyes, he knew as well as everyone else in your life that if there was one thing you couldn’t take, it was someone shouting at you. It always sent your anxiety sky rocketing and left you spiralling. “Leave Gray. Now please.” You whispered, holding back the desperate urge to breakdown in front of him. “With pleasure, Bitch.” He spat before leaving your apartment the same way he entered. Those words, although simple ones, held so much more meaning to you when they fell from his lips, lingering in the air and consuming your mind. The tears instantly began to stream, letting out a choked sob. “If only you knew.” You thought out loud.

You were jolted awake by an increasingly louder banging on your door. You glance over at your clock, 2:39AM. Grayson. He had came to apologise for acting like such a dick. You slipped out of bed and wrapped your blanket around you tightly. The relentless torture your front door was under not once letting up. You peaked through the peep hole, you weren’t a complete idiot, you had to be sure it was Gray. But who else would turn up at your door at this time right? Crack. You felt your heart shatter and swore you could hear the broken pieces hit the hard floor of your hallway. There, stood your ex boyfriend, Riley. You could of sworn you were frozen to that very spot, but your brain took control and carried you off towards the bedroom, rapidly grabbing for your phone and gripping it tightly to your chest. You creeped back towards the door cautiously, not wanting to make too much noise. “Riley you need to leave. Now please.” You spoke politely, which was beyond what he deserved. “Y/N! Open the door please. I need you. I’m a mess without you. Seeing you today reminded me off that!” He pleaded. “You’ve survived 2 years, keep going. I have a boyfriend Riley. Please leave.” You responded, heart non stop pounding against your chest, taking your breath away with every thump. “Y/N! YOU STUPID BITCH! OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR!” He growled through the door, repeatedly kicking at it now. “JUST LEAVE RILEY!!!!” You retreated into your bedroom, then into the bathroom and locked both doors. You violently sobbed into the blanket that had been wrapped around your body as you reached for your phone.

To Babe💘: Gray, please.

Read at 2:45am

3 missed calls from Babe💘

To Babe💘: Hello?

Read at 2:52am

You sobbed even more, realising that he was ignoring you at a time when you needed him the most. You don’t remember when, but you must have eventually passed out on the cold bathroom tiles. You didn’t have the energy to get up, so you sat up against the side of your bath. You reached for your phone, only to see not one single sign of contact from Grayson. You felt the all too familiar feeling rising in your chest and taking control of your breathing. Another panic attack. You hadn’t had one in months due to the calmness Grayson provided, he was your light within the darkness, but he wasn’t here to save you this time. You texted him once more before you fully broke down.

To Babe💘: Grayson please, I need you. Now.

You knew this would work. His full name over text was only ever used in an emergency. You shut your phone off to try and focus on your breathing rather than how shitty your boyfriend was being right now. You had completely forgotten about the text and 30 minutes later you heard the front door swing open. “Y/N!? Where are you?!” Seconds later he enters the bathroom and finds your small form, tear stained cheeks and violently shaking from your cold night alone. “No no no, baby I’m so so sorry. Y/N look at me yeah? Focus on my voice. Deep breaths for me.”

He tried to scoop you into his arms but you cowered away. In that moment he swore he could feel his heart shatter. He had become the man he’d promised you he’d never be. Grayson knew you had and still struggle with your mental health, although he didn’t know much about the causes of it all. He let his anger get the best of him once again and he hurt you in the process. “Angel, I cant express how sorry I am. I didn’t mean to snap at you and I certainly didn’t mean what I called you.”

There it was again. His words began to replay in your head for the 100th time. “With pleasure, Bitch.” “STOP! Please make it stop Gray. I don’t wanna be back there anymore, I can’t be back there.” You begged him, clinging to his shirt now. He cautiously began to rub his hands along your back, palms sore from the strength he used to grip the steering wheel on the way over to your apartment. “Back where love? Talk to me please, I want to help you.” The feeling of Grays hand on your body, knowing he was close to you, knowing you were safe now, your breathing slowly began to regulate. You finally lifted your head and looked up to meet his eyes. Teary and bloodshot, a mirror image of yourself. You could see, scrap that, you could feel that he was sharing your pain. He didn’t know why you was feeling it, but he could feel it all nonetheless. You took in a shakey breath as you began.

“Riley seriously, they’re a pair of shoes? I bought them as a treat for myself for getting promoted.” You tried to explain to him, annoyance growing every passing minute. You were always smart with your money, never splurging out on fancy items. You’d never really felt like you’d needed them. However, earlier this month you’d been called into your bosses office and offered a better paying position at your work, which you gladly accepted. You’d decided that you would finally buy the shoes you’d been eyeing up for months now but had never talked yourself into buying. They were $300 but you decided you deserved them, your boyfriend clearly didn’t feel the same way. “I don’t care Y/N, you cant just start spending our money so carelessly, especially not this close to when rent is due and for something so minor as a promotion.” He countered, words laced with resentment. You couldn’t help but let out a snort. “Our money? It wasn’t ‘our money’ when you went out and bought that watch.” You pointed to the, in all honesty, hideous watch that was strapped around his wrist with pride. “I spent my hard earned money on those shoes because I deserved them, I worked for them.” You spoke, calmly and with confidence. “I seriously don’t understand your problem, please explain? Like I know it may be hard for your fragile masculinity to accept that not only a woman but your own girlfriend earns more than you, but that doesn’t give your misogyny a free pass to belittle my achievements”. You knew the second you said that, you would come to regret it. “You want me to explain? With pleasure, Bitch.”

The tears were once again streaming down your face once you finally stopped to breath again. “It was abusive and toxic, I knew I had to leave him, I had to get out of there so I did. I never looked back after I left but I guess life has a way of not letting you forget your past, no matter how hard you try to.” You sighed, so tired from the nights previous events. You’d explained to Grayson about what had happened with Riley turning up at your door, you’re grateful he’d left before Gray got there otherwise you may of been spending your night bailing his ass out of prison right now instead of in his arms. You’d explained about your past with him and why things had ended. You knew Gray had many more questions but it was clear you were not ready to answer them right now and you were extremely thankful he left the topic alone. You quite frankly didn’t want to entertain your memories of Riley anymore and Grayson knew that. He planted a kiss on your forehead before scooping you up, “wanna watch a film and cuddle? You can choose the movie.” He wiggles his eyebrows and gave you his signature smirk. “Yes please, only if you bring me the ice cream though!” You giggled, letting the last 3 hours fade to the back of your mind.

You were out like a light after 30 minutes, head in Grayson’s lap as he carelessly traced shapes along your arms, watching your chest rise and fall and lips slightly parted. “I will never let this happen to you again, you have my word. I love you more than I love myself angel.” He spoke gently, watching in awe as your lips curled to form a faint smile. “Mine” he thought to himself, “All mine.”

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mylifeasaserver · 5 years

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My Day As It Happened: Mother's Day 2019

9AM: My stupid ass wakes up because my stupid ass volunteered to go in early because my stupid ass wants more money for storm chasing.

9:30AM: My stupid ass finally gets out of bed. I rush through the shower and head to work, making the critical mistake of missing breakfast when I have a long day ahead.

9:45AM: My stupid ass shows up to a packed parking lot with a ton of people out front. I get out of my car and some jackass in the parking lot asks me if I know how long the wait is. I inform him that I don't, I just got here. He tells me to call and find out for him, I decline. He tells me I'm lazy, in return I call him a jackass.

9:50AM: I walk in and I'm informed that I have 5 tables waiting for me - they know I always show up early so they went ahead and sat me. Joke's on them though, I only came in early because I have to poop. The GM is very displeased when I tell him I'm going to the employee bathroom and it won't be safe to enter until the door handle stops glowing.

9:56AM: I have successfully completed one of those dumps that really gives you a boost and improves your mood - deny it if you want, but you know exactly what I'm talking about.

10AM: After a thorough hand washing because I'm an asshole but I'm not disgusting, I find out that the GM went to each of my tables while I was ascending to another plane of existence and informed them I was on my way but would be a few minutes. Since they had a seat, all were comfortable with a couple minute wait.

10:15AM: All 5 tables have drinks and their orders are in. I stacked the tickets and put them all in at once. The GM tells me not to do that, but has no response when I ask him which tables I should've ignored in favor of a slower approach. It's now I'm told about our sales contest.

10:20AM: A server in the next section over asks me to pick up a 2-top she's too weeded to take. I agree. It's my newest friend Jackass, from the parking lot. OH BOY! He asks me if I regret giving him grief earlier since now I'm not getting a tip, and tells me to be honest. The smug look falls off his face when I tell him I don't care, as I'll have more than enough tables today so his non-tip won't even register. I'll still give him passable service though. He orders.

10:55AM: All 6 of my tables have their food, full drinks, and their check. All of them, even Jackass, are happy with the level of service they were given. I know because Jackass was the worst tip at 13%. It was nice that we could reach some level of understanding.

12:15PM: The kitchen comes to a standstill. No orders leave for 15 minutes, and none of the servers know why. I never did find out. I didn't ask either, so there's that.

1:30PM: We're off wait, and sections are adjusted for the night servers. Most of us get a 5 table section. The hostess, the really good one, starts apologizing to me. She double sat me 2-tops and doesn't want me to get mad at her. I laugh because double sat 2-tops is nothing. She's a good kid. I tell her if any server gives her shit about such a ridiculous thing to tell them to go bus themselves.

2PM: I get double sat again - a 5-top and a 10-top, but right next to one another. Company policy is anything over an 8-top requires 2 servers, but company policy can go fuck itself.

2:15PM: The 5 top has ordered, the 10 isn't even all here. I cleverly get drinks for those that are there, because that's less I have to do later. One of the adults spills his water.

2:20PM: The water mess is cleaned up, and the people at both tables have a good laugh as I give the adult a kid's cup. Now having a good time, both tables interact with one another and me. A good tip is all but guaranteed. I have no other tables, so I take the time to fuck around with people in my section.

2:30PM: The rest of the 10-top arrive, and they all order what I recommend. All ten of them - this really bodes well for the sales contest.

3PM: The 5-top is happily chatting with one another after finishing their meal. At this point they can camp all night and I wouldn't care. The 10-top is happily eating the food I recommended. Since the window (where food magically appears in the kitchen for servers to run, for those of you who don't work in a restaurant) is clear and I have no dirty tables, I start walking around the dining rooms looking for dishes to take or refills to get to help coworkers. I find two tables that say they've been waiting 25 minutes for service.

3:15PM: I find out that Duckface showed up, checked in with the hosts, and then promptly got sent home because she wouldn't put her goddamn phone away. Nobody thought to tell the hosts. Now I have tables in 2 dining rooms. Delightful. Their orders are in and I offer both tables a free dessert for the inconvenience.

4PM: Both neglected tables have eaten and enjoyed their free dessert. I tell the GM what I did and he flips his shit - telling me I can't go giving food away. I tell the GM I planned to pay for the desserts myself and show him the slip to prove it, and then tell him I'll buy anything I want for my tables. I get enough off of both tables to buy the desserts 7.5 times over. I know how to handle annoyed people.

5PM: I have no tables anywhere in the dining room, but the hostess who sucks at her job decides to try something new: following rotation. Soon I have 3 tables. All are super chill people.

5:30PM: The GM asks me if I can take a 17-top on my own. I look at my three tables - none of which need a damn thing - and tell him that yes, I can take a 17 on my own. Company policy clearly only applies when it's convenient, so I can conveniently circumvent it when it suits me. I make a mental note to remember this table for when I defy policy in the future.

5:45PM: I only have the 17 people at this point. Their order is in. They have drinks.

6PM: The order for the 17 top comes out of the kitchen. 3 steaks were overcooked, 2 plates had the wrong sides, and 2 of the delivered plates weren't what was supposed to be part of the order. First thought I have? HOW DID I FUCK IT UP SO BAD? Wasn't me. Fortunately, the steaks were mid rare, sides are an easy fix, and the other 2 plates were an easy fix. The people were cool about it. I do not offer free desserts.

7PM: The 17-top is done eating. Prebussing is done. Checks are split and delivered. The hostess asks me if I mind being skipped in rotation so I can help another server who is having a rough time of things. I may have misjudged her, so I'm glad I follow my own advice and don't give the host(esse)s any shit. I don't care if I don't get any other tables at this point of the night since I'm due to be cut soon. The server in need of help has a particularly difficult table that's trying to do their best to be the most pain in the ass group in restaurant history. She has 2 other tables that I more or less take over. I more or less don't take the tips though, because that's not helping. I make a mental note to remember these tables for when I need help in the future...just in case.

7:10PM: The Table of Pain has successfully given their server a mini breakdown, and while she's composing herself the good manager makes a grave mistake and asks me to care for this table. The regret of this decision could weigh on her for quite some time, depending on how this plays out. The table is four bastardly old people who aren't happy with anything and hate everything. They seem to freely hurl insults at me as they did the server who is still out back.

7:15PM: I've decided that I give zero fucks about what these people think. If they want to be pissy assholes I will happily deliver a reason for it. They inform me that every time they come to our restaurant the food is bad, the service is bad, and our prices (which are pretty fucking cheap) are too high. I tell them it's mighty stupid to keep coming back when things are that bad, but that's more on them than on us. Much to my disappointment, they respond favorably to this treatment. They must have assumed I was joking.

7:20PM: I tell the Table of Pain that since they clearly don't know how to order food I'm going to order for them (coincidentally the dinner in the sales contest.) Again, they bewilder me by responding favorably to it. I decide that if they like abuse that I'm here for them. I allow them to order sides and I put the order in.

7:30PM: The Table of Pain officially becomes mine, and the other two that I more or less took over have left. Oh goody. I refill drinks at my sole table, and tell them that I don't care whether they want more to drink or not so they can deal with it. I think I have this figured out.

7:45PM: The food arrives. I put the main course (same for everybody) down on the table, and tell them they can figure out who gets what side, and then I put them down wherever there was room. The good manager hears this and drags me into the office to ask me what the hell I'm thinking.

8PM: I'm cut. I'm also not going to give the Table of Pain a chance to say they were ignored.

8:30PM: The Table of Pain is done eating. I tell them they can figure out splitting the check on their own and they decide to surprise me by using the word "please" in asking me to split it for them. I say "Fine, if you're gonna be nice about it." I split the checks and tell them to leave and not let the door hit them on the way out. They clearly must assume I'm kidding. Again I'm dragged into the office so the good manager can try and figure out what the hell I'm thinking. If they complain I'm being written up. SO SCARY!

8:35PM: The Table of Pain flags down a server and asks for the manager. She goes out. They tell her they actually enjoyed themselves "for once" and their waitress gave them a hard time and they liked it. MOTHERFUCKERS I WAS TRYING TO PISS YOU OFF SO YOU WOULDNT COME BACK! Now I get to clean my section, do my sidework, and roll silverware.

8:45PM: Reap the rewards of a 4% tip from the Table of Pain and discover the hostess that I previously thought sucked at her job had already cleared and wiped my tables for me. Now I'm tipping her out because despite company policy forbidding it, my GM has taught me to ignore policy when it suits me.

9:15PM: My side work is done. My section is cleared. I find out that I won the sales contest - and it wasn't even close - and one of the prizes offered was to skip rolling silverware. **for those wondering, the other choices were to get cut early one night this coming week, choose your section, or a free meal** I gleefully claim my prize of not rolling silverware and run the hell out of the building. All in all, a decent mother's day to work. Decent money too.

Normally I don't use my blog to advertise for anybody or anything, but my friend Jess has started doing art commissions. I enjoy her work and have ordered a painting for myself. Even if you don't want to buy, give her page a visit and say something nice. And if you do want to buy or have questions, talk to her. She's a good friend of mine and she's super nice. -J

theart-ofjess.tumblr.com

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