#it’s paced and set up like a childrens movie and it’s incredibly frustrating to watch

[chloecherrysip]

So I just got back from a midnight showing of the Mario Movie!!! AND I'M GOING TO TALK ABOUT IT IN DEPTH (BEHIND A CUT OF COURSE, NO SPOILERS FOISTED UPON ANYONE UNLESS THEY WANT THEM)

If you are just looking for a general impression of whether I thought it was good/bad and some things to keep in mind before you see it yourself (I do want to offer a helping hand in setting expectations for people who are afraid they've hyped it up too much), you can read that part FIRST and then I will provide a clear warning/a ton of space where you have to scroll further to get to the actual spoilers so you can back out! But I AM going to spoil things after I provide that warning, so please don't read further if you don't want to know.

(Also if you don't want to read through all the spoilers but you DO want to know if something specific happens/doesn't happen, feel free to message me! I don't mind answering.)

LET'S-A GO

MY GENERAL, NOT-SO-SPOILERY THOUGHTS:

As someone who has loved these characters for a very long time and has always longed for more media with them, I really, genuinely did have a wonderful time watching the movie. Now that I'm home, I'm realizing that my face actually ACHES from smiling too much, haha. I think everyone who has that built-in affection for the source material will have a good time with it and not regret seeing it, and the movie seriously FLIES by because you're just so busy enjoying it and being along for the ride!

ALSO, IF YOU WERE WORRIED ABOUT THIS (NO SPECIFICS, WILL GET INTO IT MORE BELOW), MARIO AND LUIGI AND THEIR RELATIONSHIP IS, BY FAR AND AWAY, THE BEST PART OF THE MOVIE, THEY ARE SO UNBELIEVABLY ADORABLE EVERY MOMENT THEY'RE TOGETHER, WHICH IS NOWHERE NEAR ENOUGH TIME BUT OH WELL. GIVE ME A MOVIE WHERE THEY'RE TOGETHER THE WHOLE TIME RIGHT NOW, I DEMAND IT

THAT SAID....

I do think that if you are someone who has spent a lot of time theorizing about potential scenes/conversations between characters and hoping for meaningful interactions and a lot of emotional resonance and payoff (like me!), you need to bring your expectations WAY, WAY, WAYYYYYY down before going in. Bring them incredibly far down, and then bring them down a little lower, even. Trust me on this.

I saw in a review before I went in that "you can tell pretty immediately when watching that this is meant to be an extremely surface-level movie for children" and I wasn't sure what that meant, but after seeing it...yeah. yeah, I do see what they meant. There is just a lack of depth here that's pretty glaring (even for a children's movie!) and I think the short length of the movie is what really, REALLY hurts it. I just desperately wish it was 10 minutes longer and every scene had another two minutes added on where the characters could just TALK to each other. The characters almost never get to just talk to each other about anything that isn't servicing the moving of the plot forward at a breakneck pace, which is sad!!!! As much as I loved seeing all the characters together, it all just felt...a little empty. And that stinks, really.

Also, a good thing to know: if you have watched ALL the trailers/TV spots like many of us have, you have seen a VAST majority of the movie already, like 65% at least, I would say. Everything but the first 10 minutes and the last 15-20 minutes, basically! And while there are additional shots/pieces of dialogue in those scenes, of course, several of the scenes from the trailers where people were like "oh boy, can't WAIT to see the rest of that scene" - uhhhh, you basically already saw the whole scene, I'm sorry to say. That was definitely a bit of a disappointing realization for me, to realize that a scene I'd looked forward to from the trailers was here and - oh, it's already over, we're moving on. :( (And I can write a list of which scenes those were down below, if you want to know.) The movie really, REALLY needed some time to breathe, for goodness sake! This is probably the most frustrating thing, just not understanding why it had to be so SHORT and why every scene is paced like lightning.

ALSO: a couple of lines from the trailers that people really loved are not in the movie at all!?!?!?!?!?! I WAS APPALLED. WHAT HAPPENED THERE? WAS THE SCENE CUT OR DID THEY JUST RECORD LINES WITHOUT SCENES ATTACHED SPECIFICALLY FOR THE TRAILER????? (I will also list these below!)

All in all, I do want to be clear that I am NOT majorly disappointed! A little disappointed, sure, but I'm still smiling thinking back on the movie and I don't regret seeing it at all! I think people will enjoy it a lot if they just manage their expectations going in!!! But yeah...I think there's going to be a LOT of "fix-it fic" that comes out of this movie, whether that's people elaborating on the scenes or simply writing a better, longer, more emotionally resonant version of the plot (which honestly I might dabble in, LOL)

AND NOW LET'S GET INTO ACTUAL SPOILERS

FIRST, MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION: DO MARIO AND LUIGI GET TO HUG WHEN THEY REUNITE????? SCROLL DOWN TO FIND OUT

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THEY DO!!! AND IT'S THE BEST

I'm not even joking, it's my favorite moment of the movie by far, absolutely no contest, would watch it 1,000+ times on repeat and die happy, LOL. It comes and goes quickly like all things in this movie does but they DO get a few beats to themselves and just - their faces!!!! their body language!!!! THE RELIEF AND HAPPINESS AND LOVE FOR EACH OTHER IS SO PALPABLE, JUST IN ALL THE LITTLE WAYS THEY REACT AND TOUCH EACH OTHER!!! I would have to see it again to really get all the little details, I'm sure I missed things in the moment, but the highlights are Mario cupping Luigi's face in both hands REALLY sweetly and also going in for a second quick hug where he lifts Luigi off the ground. And then there is some light ribbing from Luigi about what the heck he's wearing (he's still in the Tanooki powerup!) XD

Unfortunately, no one cries or gets teary (at least not that I noticed? I could be wrong and there was a super quick moment of it) but other than that, it was truly a lovely, little moment and this what I cared most about in the movie by far, SO I CAN REST EASY NOW. I think I saw someone say "I want their reunion hug to be good enough that it's featured in ALL Mario & Luigi hug compilations" and ohhhh, trust me, it WILL be!

(If you are curious about context for their reunion, here you go: there is unfortunately no jailbreak or anything like that, Luigi is still in jail when Bowser decides to SACRIFICE ALL HIS PRISONERS BY DROPPING THEM, CAGE AND ALL, INTO LAVA to prove his love for Peach!?!?! Peach herself manages to temporarily stop the cages from lowering but then Luigi is the lowest hanging cage and basically gets most of his cage EATEN AWAY BY LAVA but manages to crawl out and try to escape, only to fall! BUT THIS IS WHEN MARIO IS FIRST GETTING THE TANOOKI POWERUP AT THE SAME TIME AND HE SWOOPS IN AND SAVES HIM, IT IS GREAT AND SUPRISINGLY TENSE)

I will get into more detail about the rest tomorrow in a follow-up post when it's not almost 4:30 in the morning, but here are some more spoilers/things I liked or didn't like!

LIKED:

Pretty much everything in Brooklyn! I will write a more specific list tomorrow of all the sweet Mario & Luigi stuff but it is all EXTREMELY good, to the point that I started to actively dread the separation :(

PEACH GETTING CAPTURED AND GOING THROUGH WITH A WEDDING TO BOWSER TO SAVE HER PEOPLE BUT THEN KICKING ASS AND TAKING NAMES ALL BY HERSELF???? SHE SAVES HERSELF, NO MARIO NEEDED, AND IT'S FANTASTIC AND UNEXPECTED

Mario and DK's rivalry is SO juvenile but SO funny. All their little sniping at each other is cute XD

Bowser is also SO funny??? Everything with him pining after Peach and his SONG and all of his minions being EXTREMELY confused about his plan made me laugh more than anything else (BIG Mario Odyssey visual references for the wedding, btw XD)

I'M SORRY, I GOTTA SAY IT AGAIN....JUST MARIO AND LUIGI IN GENERAL. EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM. THEY ARE PERFECT LITTLE MEN WHO LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH. ALSO, VINDICATION FOR ME BECAUSE WHAT MARIO SAYS TO LUIGI IN THE WARP PIPE IS "nothing can hurt us as long as we're together" (which is then repeated later at a critical moment) and nobody believed me that he was saying that but he IS!!!!!!! I KNEW IT

The whole "why is Peach the only human here?" question getting EXPLORED???? AND SHE HAS A BACKSTORY WHERE SHE ESSENTIALLY IS FROM MARIO & LUIGI'S WORLD AND WAS FOUND AND RAISED BY THE TOADS???? It was VERY interesting and i was EXTREMELY intrigued

Stuff that was disappointing:

There was essentially nothing about Mario and Peach and Toad's teamup & journey that you didn't already see in the trailers/TV spots :( There's maybe a COUPLE of cute, new lines but that's it.

Other scenes where you basically saw it all if you saw the trailers/TV spots - the fire flower fields scene (other than Peach's backstory! But no more talking about Luigi from Mario, waaah), the Bowser + Luigi interrogation (a tiny bit more to it but barely anything and they do not directly interact again, SORRY FANS OF THEM), Luigi in the Dark Lands, and the threesome traveling to different lands. :(

THE LINES "I'm not afraid! I'd do anything for my brother" and "I hope you told your brother how much you loved him because you're probably not gonna see him ever again" ARE NOT IN THE MOVIE (UNLESS I BLACKED OUT OR WAS DISTRACTED AND MISSED THEM) AND THAT IS ACTUALLY A CRIME!!!!!! I AM GENUINELY KIND OF UPSET ABOUT THIS AND DEMAND MORE INFO. HOW THEY COULD RECORD THE FIRST LINE IN PARTICULAR AND NOT INCLUDE IT???? SHAME, SHAME, SHAME

Again, just....a lack of characters getting to have conversations/connections in general. Mario and Luigi's relationship and closeness is the only one that you really BELIEVE. Mario and Peach just don't get time to TALK, and neither do Mario and Toad. Honestly, Mario and DK's relationship felt more fleshed out in the end, and even that was just by a tiny bit.

Speaking of...no Mario + Peach romance in the least, sorry. :( They get ONE scene where DK makes fun of Mario for "flirting" with her but that's basically it. They don't even really get a scene with any romantic undertones other than just general smiling/warmth at each other?

ALSO: no Rosalina, no Daisy, no Wario/Waluigi, no Bowser Jr or the Koopalings, no real cameos of any sort that I picked up on EXCEPT you do see King Boo and some other notable villains at Bowser and Peach's wedding, which was neat! But Daisyyyyyyy. ;____;

Lumalee literally plays NO actual role in the movie and there is no sacrifice for a 1-up or anything like that. The character is just there to be morbid comic relief, which is kind of a letdown!

I HAVE TO SLEEP NOW, but quick thing about the ending (I will elaborate in another post) - the final battle is truly BONKERS. It's NOT a classic Mario VS Bowser battle at all, which is what I originally wanted, but jury's still out on whether I liked it or not? Will have to sleep on it. XD

WILL FOLLOW UP WITH ANOTHER POST TOMORROW WHEN I'M NOT ACTIVELY FALLING ASLEEP

[hargrove-mayfields]

Getting real tired of the duffers and their split-second coincidences.

If Murray hadn’t gotten the code wrong, and Suzie hadn’t made Dustin sing with her to get the right code, thus forcing that ridiculously long montage, they could’ve closed the gate before the Russians arrived, so Billy wouldn’t have died and Hopper wouldn’t have been captured. If that random guy hadn’t walked past the Creel house and seen Erica, if Jason hadn’t responded to that tip and crushed the Walkman during the fight, if Mike's speech had taken just a few seconds less, Max wouldn’t have died. If Murray hadn’t been in the right spot at the right time with his flamethrower then Joyce and Hop would’ve died. Actually all of Russia was just one massive predictable chain of events, starting from the moment Joyce got the package, to Enzo conveniently being at the phone when they call back, to Yuri's betrayal conveniently happening in enough time to get them in the prison right before the demogorgon fight, to them finding a grate in the floor that lead to the middle of nowhere but was still close to Yuris hideout, etc. Also the California crew finding the Nina Project at the same exact time it’s being busted so they can take El away before the government realizes she wasn’t killed. The timing of every single moment is way too practiced and forced.

They’ve been doing this shit since season 1, the earliest I can think of being Jonathan taking an extra shift so he conveniently wasn’t home to notice Will went missing overnight or to give him a ride home from the Wheelers. One (usually) implausible thing after another building and building until it’s just over in the end and you feel empty because nothing really happened. It’s honestly getting boring. You can’t make a good show out of pure tension with no big pay-off. They drag out these sequences just for the outcome to be exactly the same. Hopper was in Russia for all nine episodes, and then he gets like five minutes to reunite with his family. Talk about rushed. We all knew he was going to survive, so putting him in these situations that were never going to end badly for them just made the Russia sequences feel long and unnecessary. And later, if Mike hadn’t said anything and El gave up, Max still would’ve died because the Walkman was broken. So what did the love confession add? They already created the setup, we could’ve skipped the middle entirely because it didn’t actually change anything in the long run. This is how they end up with details that they forget completely and it’s honestly just a frustrating way to write a story.

But they keep doing this over and over, crafting these extremely high stakes situations that they think are plot twists, where the predicted outcome still happens in the end, and there’s loose ends left over. That’s why I think the ending of the Piggyback felt so flat. Because it was the first moment in the season pretty much that wasn’t pinballing off of another. It felt like the start of the next season instead of a meaningful conclusion to everything that had happened in this season. Because after killing off two characters, their tension was used up, and they had to find a way to start over and fill in all the gaps they’d left in the storytelling while they were chasing those high-strung, coincidental plots. At some point, they realized they’d written themselves into a dead spot by beating this tactic to death and just went with a spongebob time card to fix all their narrative problems for them while they dumped all of the plot exposition into a half hour block of dramatic shots, which very much just felt out of place as a conclusion to this massive season with multiple episodes the length of films.

[randomnotesofmyown]

Sailor Moon Eternal: the Outers

The first half of the second part of Sailor Moon Eternal was about the life the Outers had been living for six months after the death busters got defeated.

It started with Haruka wondering how Usagi would answer if she asked her about her dream.

Then it revolved around Hotaru, growing up at an incredible pace since the day of the total solar eclipse, making Setsuna and Michiru wondered if Saturn would awaken yet again.

During a violin lesson, when it was Hotaru's turn to play the instrument, the ghost of a Pegasus appeared, and then followed by an apparition of Chibi Usa.

Then after dinner, Hotaru played a solar system development game under Haruka's watch. 

In her simulation of what happened in the solar system, Hotaru presented the vision that the Earth became shrouded in shadow and the Moon lost it glow after the total solar eclipse.

After Hotaru went to take a bath, the other three Outers discussed the vision shared by Hotaru. Setsuna determined that enemies had infiltrated, and Michiru, frustrated at losing the ability to do what they once could, lost her composure on hearing those words.

Michiru recalled, as Setsuna looked at her with her eyes wide open, what they all sensed on the day of total solar eclipse and pointed out they couldn't transform.

And Haruka, feeling that there was no longer place for them as senshi, sadly added that they were no longer needed, the Inners could carry out the missions on their own.

Hotaru was about to enter the bath when a thunder stroke, causing the light in the bathroom to go out. She then saw in a mirror an apparition of Sailor Saturn, and was told that it was time for a new awakening.

And then, Hotaru awakened once again as Sailor Saturn. She delivered Sailor Crystals to the others after saying that they were all destined to live for a particular person.

Then the Outers said goodbye to the peaceful, dreamlike life, set off and headed to the place where they should go (Haruka), the place where their real dreams existed (Michiru and Setsuna). Even though they were all fully aware of the danger and the possibility of being killed (As shown in season 3).

The Outers got to the Dead Moon Circus, transformed, freed the Inners from the enemies' trap (Uranus and Pluto), and told the Inners that the Prince and Princess were in danger (Neptune).

Uranus and Neptune then fended off a round of attacks by the Amazon Quartet, and Saturn called out to Chibi Usa with her Glaive.

And Chibi Usa saw them in Neptune's Talisman.

Sensing the return of the Outers, Usagi told Chibi Usa to go ahead. So Chibi Usa transformed, requested the Talisman to go to where Neptune was, and headed out.

Neptune had her mirror back.

With that, she showed the Inners the actual state of the world outside the Circus. 

And the Outers explained to the Inners what happened.

A triumphant Zirconia emerged before the Senshi, turned Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Mask into the form of children and left.

Saturn and Chibi Moon chase after the Amazon Quartet. Saturn repeatedly asked the Quartet to wake up, saying that they were being exploited. After she disabled the Quartet's trick that fed her and Chibi Usa with nightmare, Saturn walked to the Quartet, and extended her hand. 

The handshake was interrupted by Zirconia, who confined the Quartet in four pieces of marble, and trapped the two Senshi in two shards of glass.

Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Mask returned to the surface of the Earth after the spell cast against them was nullfied and they were changed back into their original form.

Zirconia appeared again and fed the Senshi with nightmare. After the Senshi were freed from it, Uranus vowed on behalf of the others that

They then launched a counter attack as a group, with Uranus taking the lead. The Senshi chased after Zirconia.

After being rescued by Sailor Moon, Saturn picked up the four pieces of marble.

After the battle was over, Neptune looked into her mirror and told the others that the nightmare was about to end.

After the remaining shadow was removed from the Moon, Saturn stepped forward, knelt, and presented the four pieces of marble, saying that:

And

From the marble four future Senshi emerged.

Saturn assured the four that they would protect the Princess. And so, the future Senshi departed.

What happened after the departure of the four future Senshi served only to wrap up the story and the roles the Outers played ended here.

# # #

At the beginning of this second part, the Outers, unable to transform, thought their role as Senshi was over. Yet the reawakening of Saturn, and the Sailor Crystals that were given to Haruka, Michiru and Setsuna enabled them to transform and joined the Inner.

Throughout the second half of this movie, the Outers, guided by Saturn, acted as the bedrocks, boosted the morale of the others, and signaled the end of the nightmare. Saturn, the most significant of the Outers, was shown to possess sharp intuition, and very independent. Without her, the Senshi might lose.

And this would be the last post I write about Sailor Moon Eternal.

Update/Comment: 

I came to see today that there was one thing I didn't take note when I first wrote this: Uranus, despite not being able to transform for an unspecified period, still remained agile:

The only logical explanation would be that Haruka, during the time when she was just an ordinary human, still made the effort to hone her combat skills. This served as a side note on how much importance she attached to her role as Senshi.

It required effort to make sense of what the Inners had on their mind; it required an even bigger effort to look at the clues and deduce what went on in the mind of the Outers. This was the case for Haruka/Uranus, it would be the same for the other three. Yet for now, it is likely that I would only come to see those when I revisit the movie yet again in future.

Edited June 24, 2021.

Second edit: August 10, 2021.

[bentforkent]

to the moon and to saturn - chapter two

spencer reid x fem!reader

navigation and summary

there is a version of this story featuring my oc sara on my wattpad and ao3!

word count: 3,559

content warnings: alcohol mentions

previous chapter | next chapter 

betty 

spencer has a recurring dream about her. in this dream, it’s y/n’s 18th birthday. his brain doesn’t know what she looks like past age seven, so dream-y/n has her youthful face on an adult body. her eyes crinkle at the edges when she smiles. she’s holding a birthday cake that’s covered in lit candles. there’s no indication that spencer baked the pink, sloppily-frosted cake, but in his dream, he knows he did. 

she holds the cake out towards him. “make a wish, spencer,” she says, her voice sounding far away and warbled. “it’s not my birthday, love,” he insists, swiping some of the frosting and brushing it across her cheek.

she grins and sets the cake down on the round table in front of her. “sure, but i want to share mine with you.” she pulls out a box, gift wrapped in bright yellow paper with a large blue bow on top. he always wakes up before he can ever open it. 

 he gets this dream once a month without fail. it’s pathetic, he thinks. he hasn’t even seen y/n in twenty years. he’s doesn’t even know her, to be frank. and yet he thinks about her constantly. he---and his therapist, of course---chalk this up to the abandonment he felt when she never came back. she didn’t even say goodbye. spencer thinks about this often, wondering if it was his fault. he wonders if any or all of the horrible things he’s been through have been his fault. his sick brain tells him yes, yes they are. 

 often, when spencer thinks of y/n, he imagines her in some incredible life. a spy, maybe. he knows it’s unlikely that she’s a princess or bank robber now, but he doesn’t put it past her. he doesn’t have enough memories of her, so every play-pretend game they played as children supplements what he knows about her, creating at least some whole adult person for him to fantasize about. she’s become almost a fictional character in the movie of his life. he wishes that they weren’t estranged, wishes that he could know the real y/n instead of whatever caricature of her he’s created. even if she actually was a bank robber. he just wants to know.

wait. he just wants to know. 

spencer is lounged on his couch, cardigan long tossed aside, tie long undone. he’s been home from work for a few hours now, an easy paperwork day cutting his day short. he takes half of a second to make his decision, then pulls out his phone.

 ------

“i need you to look someone up for me,” y/n says nonchalantly, flicking through a cheesy magazine. they’re laying on penelope’s bed, tv in the other room playing a rerun episode of “the office” just loud enough for them to hear. penelope has one hand in a bowl of popcorn, and one on her laptop scrolling mindlessly through some geeky website y/n can’t comprehend.

 y/n had seen spencer that evening on her way to penelope’s house. at least she thought she did. y/n was stopped at a red light, staring straight ahead at the crosswalk before her. living in a decently populated city, there were always fun characters crossing the street, and while y/n had once been in awe of the medley of people living in dc, she’d become used to it, and stopped paying attention. at red lights, she usually takes time to relax, letting her eyes glaze over before the switch to green and the restart of traffic. but before she could check out for her 15 seconds of a mental break, she saw a long haired figure hunched over a book, crossing the street directly in front of her car. 

granted, y/n hasn’t seen spencer in twenty years. she has no clue what he looks like nowadays, but everything from his ray bradbury book to his lanky frame to his beat up converse was familiar. her eyes clung to him, desperate to catch a glimpse of his face, but it never came. and y/n felt like she was going crazy. of all the places in the world, there’s no way that spencer reid’s life path had taken him all the way from nevada to the exact same city she lived in. 

but she didn’t have to wonder, or anxiously await the next time she saw the man by chance, because her best friend was a techy genius and no one could hide from her. y/n decided then, at that red light, that she’d ask penelope to find spencer, something she couldn’t even picture herself wanting just thirty seconds earlier.

y/n’s attempt at casually bringing the topic up is futile, because a.) penelope garcia is a very nosy woman, and b.)....penelope garcia is a very nosy woman. in all of the best ways. “who?” she inquires excitedly, halting all motion that could distract her from this very important conversation. 

“it’s kind of a long story,” y/n says, closing her magazine and sitting up. she crosses her legs, a seating pose that indicates that she’s devoting everything to explaining this to penelope. “so, when i was really little, there was this boy…” 

and the suspense is killing penelope. y/n’s launched into this whole story about blanket forts, and being young, and blah blah blah whatever, but she’s not giving up her male protagonist’s name. penelope has her hands poised at her keyboard, ready to give y/n a location, occupation, and criminal record in less than 30 seconds, but she just needs to know his name. y/n talks, and talks, and talks, and penelope, as the good friend and listener she is, doesn’t interrupt once except to ask a question. 

(“so your mom was sleeping with his dad?”

 “yes! my own mother! i know, right?”)

y/n’s oblivious to the fact that penelope is on the edge of her seat, hanging on her every single word, just waiting, waiting, agonizingly waiting for a name. 

“once, i even put jell-o down a girl’s shirt for this kid,” y/n laughs. “it was cherry flavored, i’ll never forget. my first badass moment.” she stops her story with a shared chuckle, and a silence settles over the two women for a moment. 

“so, did you want me to find this prince charming, or…” penelope waggles her fingers over her keyboard as to emphasize her point.

“oh! yeah! his name is-----” 

penelope’s phone rings, and they let out a frustrated groan in unison. y/n flops back into her laying down position, knowing that when penelope’s phone rings, it almost never bodes well for wine nights.

 ----------

“garcia!” spencer greets as soon as she answers.

“as much as i’m excited to hear from my favorite doctor-profiler-boy-genius, i wonder to what do i owe this pleasure?” penelope glances over at y/n, who has already found her way back into her cosmopolitan magazine. 

 “hey, i was wondering if you could look someone up for me. i know technically it’s not ethical but---”

 “do you have a name for me, wonder boy?” penelope asks. she’s not waiting a second longer for him to spill, lest she gets trapped in yet another long-winded backstory. 

 “uh, yeah. y/n y/l/n. she---,” spencer speaks, and is immediately transferred to hold, with a short and excited “wait!” from garcia. sure, she feels bad for cutting him off twice now during the short span of their phone call, but this? this is major. 

 “y/n, tell me his name is spencer reid,” penelope says, voice coming out rushed and full of eagerness. 

 y/n’s eyes go wide. penelope was really good at her job. she got his name just from her little jell-o story? “yeah, it is, pen!” y/n laughs. “what’s he up to these days?”

 penelope covers the receiver of her phone even though spencer was on hold and couldn’t hear her anyways. “he’s on the phone with me! we work together! we’re like, super close! y/n!” penelope is emphasizing her words with crazy hand gestures, the clinking of her bracelets serving as enthusiastic punctuation.

y/n doesn’t really know how to respond to this information. “he’s FBI?” she asks, stupidly. 

“that is so far beyond the point!” penelope exclaims. “he’s the guy i was texting you about earlier today, the one i wanted to set you up with!”

y/n, with a big goofy grin on her face, tosses a piece of popcorn at her head, watching as it gets stuck in one of her ponytails. “take him off of hold, penny!” excitement courses through her veins. she had seen him earlier. what are the odds?

spencer paces anxiously in his apartment. she’d dead. y/n is dead, and garcia’s trying to find the best way to tell him. that’s why she put him on hold, he knows. there’s a crackle in the phone, and garcia’s voice rings through the speaker. “spencer?” she asks, making sure he’s still on the line. there’s giggling on her end, pulling him to the conclusion that whatever garcia was about to say, at least y/n’s not dead.

 “yeah, garcia?” spencer says, too on edge to say more than a few words at a time. 

 “i’ve got probably a million and one things to tell you about a certain y/n y/l/n,” garcia says, voice mischievous. on her end, there’s a squawk of protest followed by some shuffling. 

spencer waits patiently, and then garcia’s voice is back. “i’ve got her right here with me, actually.” 

 spencer, overwhelmed with nerves, hangs up immediately. 

 “he hung up!” penelope screams, and the two women burst into laughter. penelope’s hunched over at her laptop, cackling.

“i can’t believe he hung up,” y/n says through her fit of giggles.

“you have to come to our work get-together this weekend and see him, y/n. spencer’s hosting!” penelope says.

“he clearly doesn’t want to talk to me,” y/n says jokingly, and they laugh again. not at the boy, but at the scenario. “also, no! no ‘get-togethers.’ you know i don’t do parties.”

 ------

 y/n’s on her way to the party. it took all of 15 seconds for penelope to convince her to be her plus-one. all she had to do is say the words “casual” and “wine” and y/n was in. she tried to ignore the fact that it would just be penelope’s coworkers, one of them being her estranged best friend, and her. at spencer’s apartment, nonetheless. it was bound to be awkward, but y/n tried to focus less on that and more on how excited penelope was to introduce her to spencer. re-introduce her, rather. 

 penelope offered to drive y/n to alleviate some of her nerves, and y/n accepted graciously. neither one of them had talked about spencer since the phone call, except for penelope casually mentioning that spencer hadn’t brought up y/n to her at work at all. they’d all spent the week in limbo, then. the drive to spencer’s apartment is generally silent, penelope jumping in with words of affirmation every so often, if not to calm y/n then just to make her laugh. y/n’s leg bounces as she looks out of the window of penelope’s car. 

when they arrive, after penelope’s parked, she turns to y/n. “y/n. you are colorful, beautiful, perfect, and every other nice word i can think of. everything will be fine. but if, by some odd, unpredictable chance, everything is not fine, say the word and we will be out of there faster than you can say ‘penny.’” y/n pulls her into a tight hug, and penelope can feel her heart beating.

“what if he just tells me to, like, fuck off?” y/n murmurs.

“reid would never. he could never,” penelope says. with that reassurance, they get out of her car and head up to the party.

 -------

y/n stares at spencer’s front door as penelope knocks. the paint on it is chipping, she notes. spencer swings open the door and hoots erupt through the apartment. 

“garcia’s here!”

“hey, garcia!”

“babygirl!”

everyone’s calling for her, so she snakes past spencer and into his home with a pat on his chest. he’s stuck in the doorway and y/n’s stuck in the hall. neither of them know what to say to each other, so they’re sticking to intense eye contact and nervous foot shuffling. y/n’s here, at his apartment. he’s shocked. she’s real, she’s here, and here is his apartment.

 “you look the same,” they say at the same time, and then, at the absurdity of the situation, they laugh together. y/n, feeling empowered by the diffusion of the tension, wraps her arms around him in a hug. he’s broad, she notes. he hugs her tightly, holding on a second too long as compensation for the fact that he’d never know when their last hug had been their last. 

 “come in, come in,” spencer says. as he’s ushering her inside, hand against her lower back, he speaks again. y/n’s acutely aware of his coworkers eyes on her, but she’s distracted by his voice. “did you know that we begin to forget childhood memories while we’re in childhood still? younger children remember 60 percent of early life events, and that goes down by 20 percent in just a year or two.” 

 “hmm, so it’s weird that you remember me, then?” y/n teases as he hands her a glass of white wine.

“well, i don’t, really,” he admits, and y/n hums in agreement against the rim of her drink. 

penelope calls y/n over to where she’s sitting and introduces her to the team. y/n takes notes. penelope never really combines her work and her play, telling y/n it’s to keep her safe, so y/n revels in this insight into her best friend’s life.

 jj, the pretty blonde, seems to be the glue of the group, y/n judges. emily’s guarded, but fun, and y/n sees a lot of herself in her. derek is penelope’s favorite, y/n knows, and it’s not hard to figure out why. he’s attractive, but more than that, he’s charismatic and intelligent. y/n can’t get a good read on hotch, but she likes him well enough. rossi’s her favorite, though, his laidback, cool demeanor just mysterious enough to pique her curiosity. y/n greets everyone with a warm hello and a short introduction, and finds her place at penelope’s side.

she’s out of place for sure, but the team tries their hardest to include her. they’ve got great chemistry as a group, and y/n wins their favor when she cracks a dry joke that gets everyone laughing. she can feel spencer’s eyes on her the whole night, but she doesn’t indulge him by looking back. she’s too nervous. he keeps her glass filled all night, a gracious host, and when she thanks him each time he gives her a shaky smile. he’s nervous too, she realizes.

 when people start filtering out, y/n realizes she’d hardly spoken to spencer all night, save for some light small talk with others. she’d really like to get him alone, but she doesn’t want to overstep. spencer looks at her intently when she stands to leave with garcia. he wants to get her alone, but he doesn’t want to overstep. be bold, spencer, he thinks. it’s just y/n. but it’s not just y/n anymore. they aren’t kids anymore, blindly bonded to one another out of convenience. there’s nothing tying them together anymore except for some flimsy memories, and this scares spencer. y/n’s also insanely beautiful. this adds to his nerves. it’s not too often he has a pretty girl in his apartment alone.

 “you can stay longer if you want, y/n. i’ll drive you home,” spencer says, his words surprising even himself. his eyebrows furrow and y/n wants to smooth the crease in his forehead with her thumb. 

“okay,” she says softly, turning to penelope. “i’ll see you tomorrow, pen?” they embrace, and penelope says her bright goodbyes. when she leaves, y/n leans against the closed front door, staring at spencer expectantly. 

“do you want another drink?” he asks her, unsure of what to do with his hands. 

“no, i think i’m sufficiently tipsy-adjacent,” y/n jokes, placing her hands decidedly on spencer’s shoulders. “i think you and i should talk.” 

“yeah,” spencer replies, his amber eyes searching hers. “we can sit outside.” he leads her to his balcony, and takes a seat on his outdoor couch. 

“it looks like it might rain,” y/n says lamely, sitting next to him, close enough for their thighs to touch.

“did you know women are more likely to give a man their phone number on a sunny day rather than a cloudy one? there’s only a 14% success rate when it’s rainy, as opposed to a 22% success rate when the sun’s out.”

“that’s interesting, spencer. were you planning on asking for my number?” y/n asks jokingly. spencer flushes at the question, stammering a defense. “just kidding. you sure do know a lot of stuff, don’t you?”

“sure,” he says with a bite of his lip. “i have three phds. what i don’t know, though, is where you went when you left vegas. or why you left vegas. or…”

“or why i didn’t tell you i was leaving?” y/n finishes for him. he gives a small nod, embarrassed to admit how much it affected him, and y/n frowns. she lays the palm of her hand against his face, rubbing her thumb against his cheekbone. spencer’s taken aback by the affectionate action, but leans into her touch anyways. y/n holds that position for a minute, surveying his features. she’s not ready to tell him the story, honestly. it’s humiliating. save from the fact that her mom essentially ruined his parents’ marriage; she didn’t know the nature of spencer’s relationship with his father now. for all she knows, it’d done a complete 180 in the past 20 years, and she’d ruin everything with her anecdote. no, she couldn’t risk this. spencer looked too pretty under the moonlight, was too nice to her tonight.

“would you be mad if i didn’t want to talk about that yet?” she asks, tracing her finger down the bridge of his nose. spencer feels a little relieved by this. he’s prepared for that conversation to be a heavy one, prepared for her to say she left because of him. because he wasn’t good enough for her. he doesn’t think he can handle that confirmation tonight, so he welcomes the change in subject. 

“can we just...start over?” spencer says.

 y/n nods. “hi, i’m y/n,” she holds her hand out to shake, finally removing it from against his face. spencer takes it with a small smile. 

“i’m spencer,” he replies. they sit in silence for a while, watching the stars. the moment is long, but it feels like they’re suspended in time. like the cars and people underneath them have come to a standstill. spencer reckons y/n’s always had that effect on him, but the hustle of the city disappearing around him makes it much more pronounced.  spencer steals a quick glance at her. she looks so serene. he wonders if she’s thinking as much as he is, or if she’s simply appreciating the city sounds and night air. 

“are you thinking as much as i am?” y/n pipes up, breaking the silence. 

spencer shakes his head incredulously with a chuckle. “you took the words right out of my mouth.” 

y/n turns to face him, pulling her knees to her chest. “tell me a story. like you used to.” when spencer’s gaze meets hers, y/n’s hand moves to tuck a piece of his hair behind his ear, the movement nearly involuntary. there’s a low rumble of thunder, but it sounds far away. 

“okay,” spencer says, neither one of them breaking eye contact. he remembers her eyes being much more vibrant, but he likes the true hue better. and whenever she thought of him, y/n had always imagined glasses, like when he was a child, but being able to see his face clearly is so much better. 

“actually,” y/n starts. she finishes her statement by pressing her lips against spencer’s firmly. he threads his hands through her hair and pulls her closer to him, letting out a soft moan. the kiss is passionate, but not lustful. it’s gentle and full of energy. y/n nips at spencer’s bottom lip. he tastes like sangria. his hand travels to the side of her face, thumb rubbing against her cheek slowly. he kisses her like she's oxygen and he’s never had a breath of fresh air in his life. 

after a minute, y/n pulls away slowly, resting her forehead on his. “okay, now you can tell me a story.” 

spencer presses another chaste kiss to the corner of her mouth. “how do you expect me to remember anything right now?” 

y/n grins, pulling away from their intimate position and turning to face the stars. “i can wait. i’ve got all night.” 

[loregoddess]

Ib and Ff7

FF7 is under the cut bc I Had Some Thoughts about it, and I am so sorry.

Ib:

Favorite thing about that game: I was NOT expecting to end up as emotionally invested as I got after like, a handful of minutes playing it? Like it's a little indie rpg maker game and yet it's honestly one of the most impactful games I've ever played.

Least favorite thing about that game: The motion controls are a bit wonky which like, small indie rpg maker game mechanics are to blame, but it made getting out of the mini-maze hell when I was on my "I have to save Garry" run.

Favorite character in that game: Garry, I've never gotten so attached to a fictional character in such a short amount of time only to be BETRAYED by my own choices, resulting in him being dead and in a painting for my first ending.

Would I recommend it? Why? Yes yes yes, it's free, it's fun, and it only takes like, 30 minutes to play.

Free space to go off about something! Despite Mary being the antagonist and responsible for Garry's death in several endings, I do feel a bit bad for her and wish there was an ending where Ib could like, save both Garry and Mary. It doesn't make much sense for the overall mood of the story, but still.

Rating out of 10: 9/10, good game overall, strong narrative, slightly wonky controls, excellent soundtrack, endearing aesthetics.

FF7:

Favorite thing about that game: It has a really interesting plot and cast of characters, and just a really strong narrative overall. Getting into all the extended compilation stuff was easy because the initial game experience left me wanting to explore more. The Remake does a really good job integrating a lot of this extended lore into...whatever the Remake's narrative is trying to do.

Least favorite thing about that game: The fandom--Okay, for real though, in the original game I hated Aerith's death. Like, yes, from a story perspective as the player because she was one of my favorite characters, but I actually think that was strong writing for the narrative development. What I mean is that mechanically it was a hideous decision because it leaves this gaping hole in the game. Maybe the player was using her and now has to try and get a character they weren't used to using up to level speed with Cloud and whoever else they were using for their main battle party, and that's just frustrating from a player perspective, but also when she leaves she takes everything except the materia she was carrying with her and the player looses access to that entirely for the rest of the game, but can still purchase her staffs and stuff from in-game vendors? Like, knowing this now what's the point of using her at all for the first part of the game? There's literally no point in leveling her up when I could use the exp for someone else, and there's no reason to buy her any good equipment because her most powerful staff is in the last dungeon you can use her in and you could give her any throwaway bracelet because you're going to lose it anyway. It literally makes no sense from a mechanic standpoint and I hate it because the original game's mechanics are already wonky (although that wasn't entirely rare for that era's jrpgs) but then just having this mechanical gap appear halfway through the game just messes things up even more. The original FF7 game has a lot going on in it, but because there's so much I feel it lacks the sort of polish it could have had, and I especially feel that Aerith's death just made the lackluster mechanics feel more insulting. However, the Remake has so far done a fair job of balancing the party mechanics so that even if the writers do decide to kill off Aerith again, I don't think there will be the mechanical gap that the original game suffered from because the Remake is much more mechanically balanced and well-designed.

Favorite character in that game: Aerith and Tifa, even when I was playing through the original game with it's really wonky writing (or localization, maybe), I just liked them a lot. Aerith breaks a lot of the "jrpg squishy healer girl narrative's heart" tropes I've come to expect, and Tifa had a lot of depth stemming from all that was going on in her personal character arc, and I really appreciated the writing for both. The Remake's kept the momentum and added even more details that make me love these two even more. Special mention goes to Nanaki (Red XIII) because would it wouldn't be a game series I've been obsessed with if I didn't love one of the characters the main writing team loves to ignore.

Would I recommend it? Why? Y...yes? I mean, sort of. Like my very long rant shows, I'm not actually a fan of the mechanics of the original game, and that's saying a lot since I actually love a lot of old game's for their wonky mechanics. But like, I had a hard time figuring out the internal logic and battle systems, and I'm still not even sure what healing magic scales off of right now, or the most effective use of materia and other items to their maximum effect, which is something I usually pride myself for knowing in jrpgs. The story is really interesting, but there's also a lot of plot gaps that sometimes get explored in extended lore but were never hinted at in the original narrative (like, when I found out that Tseng and Rufus not only survived their "this character very much just got killed on screen" deaths, but got quasi-redemption arcs, I was so, so confused). Also the general pacing is really weird, like the Midgar section sets up the Turks as being Really Serious antagonists, but then they just. End up being comic relief for the rest of the game, and slightly annoying boss fights. Rufus gives this really dramatic speech about how he's going to be a tyrant who rules by fear and then spends the rest of the game Not Doing That, instead chasing after Sephiroth and failing and then dying but not really dying bc as I noted, that got retconned. Hojo is literally one of the most evil characters in the story and the root of almost every issue, but you also get directions from him on a beach surrounded by girls in sexy (for PS1 era graphics) swimsuits, and it's like, why? So like, the original is decent and has a lot of interesting points, and the ost is amazing, but the mechanics are wonky and the actual plot flow is...weird. So like, if you just want to know the story, watch a playthrough, but if you want the challenge of the wacky mechanics (which I know damn well people have figured out and made incredibly strong end-game teams), then go ahead and play it yourself. As for the Remake, I would suggest at least watching the original game to get to know the narrative to better understand how the Remake is changing the direction of the story, but also like, I'd recommend it just because it's plain fun, the mechanics are pretty easy to pick up, the ost is still amazing, and the narrative is even more rich. I would suggest a handful of things from the extended compilation works to better enjoy some of the Remake additions (i.e. the novel where Kyrie and Leslie first appeared as characters, they're both actually super amazing and the Remake only skims the surface with them), but like, it's not necessary for the overall enjoyment of the Remake.

Free space to go off about something! I've gone off about enough already, but I would suggest avoiding the fandom if you're interesting in getting into the game because there's so much petty arguing over shipping nonsense and what is or isn't canon, like, it's not the most toxic fandom I've ever seen but it's not what I'd call fun either. Would fully recommend the entire compilation though, I really loved all the novels/short stories, and even just watching playthroughs of the games related to FF7 was so much fun and added so much depth to the world and characters. Would recommend Advent Children, but only after playing/watching the original game and reading at least On a Way To a Smile (and additionally reading The Kids Are Alright for the Complete version of the movie) because nothing in the movie makes any damned sense otherwise.

Rating out of 10: Original game is 6/10, and the Remake is 9/10

[iwikedinos-notactive]

can i get an alphabet thingy with sting or gray 🥺 thank you lovely

- Couldn’t decide so I did both. Enjoy! - Dino 🦖

Affection - Sting is an attention whore. He’s such a cuddly boi who will literally give you any form of affection at any time. He is super clingy and sometimes it gets a little annoying but you still love him.

Babies - Sting would want 700,000 children. He loves kids! Two girls, two or three boys. It's a full house.

Cuddles - Sting is a very cuddly person. He’s a back hugger. He always lets you sit on his lap whenever you watch tv or do anything.

Damage - Sting hasn’t dated too many people since he’s been attempting to improve himself but he has been cheated on before. I dunno why I feel strongly about that but I do. Poor baby. Its painful.

Eager - Sting will want to tell you immediately that he likes you. He will make it pretty extravagant too so you absolutely can’t say no to a date.

Fights - Sting gets really pouty when you don’t agree with him. Even when he knows he’s wrong, he will still argue.

Goofy Moments - Makin’ out in the guild master's office.

Home - Not too big or messy but the interior is insane. He’s got red colored walls and statues everywhere. Extravagant.

Intuition - Sting is 100% an airhead. He will not know when your upset. You have to tell him your upset or he will just assume you great.

Jealousy - STING IS SO JEALOUS! Jesus Christ Sting yeah I spoke to another guy for two seconds, and no I didn’t marry him you retard.

Kissing - Sting is the pecking type. He loves to kiss your face with kissing attacks so watch your back. He will find you.

Love Confession - Very extravagant. He’s always looking to go the extra mile. He took you somewhere high class and did it over a glass of wine and candle. Such a gentleman.

Marriage - Sting is a housewife. If you have a different opinion I will fight you. Every once in a while, you come home to him making dinner, cleaning house, etc. Whenever you two first got married he legit thought about quitting as guild master to become a housewife.

Needy - Sting is super needy. Constantly begging you for attention. Hugging you, kissing you, anything to get your attention.

Opposite - Sting wouldn’t pick a stoic partner. He’d want someone to have fun with and do cool things with. However, he needs someone who knows when playtime is over and he needs to finally work.

Pace - Sting doesn’t screw around in relationships. You’d best be prepared because he isn’t gonna waste any time. He’s a “live while we can” type.

Quit - Cheating is an absolute no-go. If you cheat on him your out forever. No friends, no nothing. Guild mates is all.

Romance - Sting is the type to set up a table in your living room with candles and food on the table at random. He’s probably the most romantic person I’ve ever wrote for.

Start - Sting really doesn’t change at all throughout the relationship. He expects you to tell him to quit when he’s over done something.

Time - (Not specified)

Undying Love - Sting trusts you with his feelings. He always has to be strong and happy for his guild but around you have can let go.

Valuable Time - Dinner dates are his go-to. Can’t go wrong with dinner and chatting about your lives.

Worst Fears - He’s scared that you will run from him if he opens up to you. He fears he will do something wrong and you won’t care for him or love him anymore.

Xe’s - Only about one or two different ones. Like a few casual dates with girls he found attractive.

Yield - Sting will never lay a finger on you if you don’t want him to. All you have to do is say the word and he will keep the relationship alive by carving messages into rocks and throwing them at you because you don’t wanna be touched or bothered.

Affection - Honestly Gray isn’t one for too much affection. He’ll hug and kiss you a bunch but if you wanna cuddle or anything major like that, you’ll have to ask for it.

Babies - Gray wouldn’t want a billion kids. One girl or boy is fine with him. However he’s pretty strict with them. He wants them to be able to take care of themselves.

Cuddles - Like I said, you gotta ask for cuddles. But his cuddles are absolutely perfect. He is a human refrigerator so it’ll never get too hot.

Damage - Gray has never dated anyone for more than a month. He broke up with them every time. Honestly he never really felt comfortable in a relationship till you came along.

Eager - Gray catches feelings, you won’t know about it. He keeps that bottled up for years. It’s, insane.

Fights - Gray stands there and just takes it. He’s not good at arguing so he lets you get all your anger out. It’s frustrating sometimes but you gotta whip him back into shape.

Goofy Moments - Snowball fights in the winter are the best.

Home - Gray has the bare minimum in the house. A habit he picked up from Ur.

Intuition - Gray has a very keen eye for your emotions. When you feel down, he’ll know, but he isn’t entirely sure how to cheer you up.

Jealousy - Incredibly jealous. But he’d never say anything. He trusts you. But if Joe lays another hand on you HE'S GONNA DIE.

Kissing - Pecking is his go-to. But when your alone, you best believe y’all are making out. He’s an amazing kisser.

Love Confession - It’s not extravagant like Sting but it’s actually the cutest thing ever. He made an ice sculpture that said “I love you” and gave it to you and if that doesn’t warrant the same thing back I don’t know what does.

Marriage - He becomes a whole lot more lax with his partner. He kinda felt like he was walking on glass when they were dating but now he feels like he understands you.

Needy - Gray is the furthest thing from needy. He will never ask for a hug, kiss, cuddles, anything. But when he’s in a bad mood or angry a hug and kiss never hurts.

Opposite - The opposite of Gray is Natsu, and Gray wants to strangle Natsu. I don’t think he could deal with dating him too.

Pace - Gray has to be forced to quicken his pace in the relationship. At first it’s just casual hugs. Then the casual hugs last from dates 1 to 7.

Quit - Gray hates taking “breaks.” If you say you just need a break, he’ll just end it. But he will be hesitant to get back with you if your explanation was weird.

Romance - Gray is a gift-giver. He loves seeing the happy look on his partners face when he gets them a cool new pen or trinket.

Start - Gray is very jumpy at the beginning of the relationship. He doesn’t like to be touched because he’s not used to it. Give him time and he’ll come around.

Time - (Not specified)

Undying Love - Gray shows his love by gifts, like trinkets and all sorts of different things. He actually made you a scrapbook of your relationship and gave it to you as a wedding present.

Valuable Time - Gray isn’t one for public dates so he will typically stay inside and watch a movie with you till you all fall asleep.

Worst Fears - Your death scares the hell out of him. Pretty much everything good in his life has died at one point and you are the last thing he needs to die.

Xe’s - One or two causal relationships. The longest one he had was four months and that was because he forgot they were dating.

Yield - He’s already pretty upfront about his dislike for affection but if you say the relationship is going too fast or anything like that he will immediately stop.

[moonlightmadnessreviews]

The Lodge (2020): Domestic terror with a cold blooded conclusion

While the home can be a place of comfort and security for most, it can often hold horror beyond our imagination and I truly enjoy when a film maker can break down the walls of a home to show us what lurks inside. The Lodge does just that, painstakingly taking its time to build to a conclusion that is both gratifying and bittersweet.

Directors Veronika Franz and Severin Fiala first made waves in the film world with their 2014 film Goodnight Mommy. I was extremely impressed with this film and loved how Franz and Fiala were able to chill our bones without the use of conventional Hollywood scares. The same can be said for their latest effort, The Lodge. First premiering at Sundance in January of 2019, Franz and Fiala teamed up with screenwriter Sergio Casci to once again explore the family dynamic in a claustrophobic and isolating manor. At times the film can feel reminiscent of the The Shining, with its snowy setting, wide angle shots down hallways and even a dog playing a pup named Grady (which HAS to be a nod to Kubrick’s film, right?!).

After losing their mother to a sudden and tragic suicide, siblings Aiden and Mia are forced to spend quality time with their father’s new girlfriend Grace, who happens to be the sole survivor of a Heaven’s Gate-like death cult. Having placed the blame of their mother’s death on Grace, tensions run high once the siblings are trapped in their mother’s mountain lodge with her. To make matters worse, the power is out, the food has disappeared and they seem to have slipped into some sort of rift in space and time, all while a snow storm rages just outside.

Riley Keough stars as Grace, Jaeden Martell and Lia McHugh play Aiden and Mia respectively, Richard Armitage plays their father Richard and finally Alicia Silverstone makes a brief but impactful return to the screen as Laura, the children’s mother. Silverstone’s performance is so impactful in the brief time she spends on screen and she really manages to say so much with her performance. I love how she is able to demonstrate grief and loss with something as simple as squeezing an eyelash curler for a few seconds too long. Martell manages to elicit sympathy while still playing a moody, prickly teen, while McHugh really helps to balance his character with just how sweet and loving she can be at times. Like Silverstone, the pain and suffering McHugh puts on screen for us is incredibly genuine.

Keough is a stand-out in the film, her character balancing barefoot on the edge of a knife as she tries to relate to the children and bring them closer, while her own traumatic past begins creeping its way closer and closer to the surface. We are introduced to the character of Grace at first only through glimpses, just missing her out of the edge of the shot, in silhouettes through frosted glass or obscured by ice on a window. Like the children, we are curious to see this evil woman who has stolen away their father’s affection, only to find she is not an old haggard witch but a beautiful young lady who bares a stunning resemblance to their mother. We really see Grace trying to make the best of a horrible situation, and once finding out a bit more about her past, we are drawn into Keough portrayal even more.

The film has a strange quality to its visuals, managing to shoot halls and rooms in a wide angle and yet making them feel terribly claustrophobic. Some shots had a digital quality to them as well, similar to the way 2018’s Unsane was shot completely on an iPhone. I enjoyed the contrast of those shots to the other, more milky and dream-like scenes. As the movie begins, we get a shot I really enjoyed of Armitage and Silverstone having a conversation while the camera slowly pulls in on their faces and manages to communicate how trapped Silverstone feels in her dire situation.

There is this push and pull between the children and Grace throughout the movie as they test one another’s limits. As is often the case with children, they aren’t aware of when they’ve pushed things a little too far, and you can tell Mia seems to be much more accepting of Grace than Aiden is. Watching Grace trying to hold it together in the face of this is great, as we get to see her desperately try to take back things she’s said to the children in anger. It’s this push and pull which helps to build to a climax, all without bringing too much attention to itself.

Though I really enjoyed the twists and turns, and how the film manages to fool you into thinking you have it pinned just for it to turn on its heels and head in another direction, it felt like it went on just a little too long. I do love a slow burn, but once you’ve really caught on to what’s happening, it feels like the film starts and stops in places. Rather than heading straight to the peak that is the films conclusion, we get stuck in the snow that are the twists and turns and I can see how some audience members may get frustrated with the film’s last act. What I will say is the film pays off in a big way, with the final 15 or so minutes being the culmination of tension we didn’t even realize was building. The tension and terror manages to sneak in and this is really a sign of great direction.

I knew I was interested in seeing this film from the moment I saw the first trailer. Keeping in mind this was back sometime in 2018 or ‘19, I feel Ike I was able to go into this movie fairly fresh and without too many expectations, and it honestly made for a wild ride. Franz and Fiala manage to once again warp the family structure and make the home a horrifying place to be. Their directing and this standout cast put together a film which will have you questioning who to root for, and what you’re even seeing to begin with. The Lodge will have it’s wide release late this February and I can’t wait for the horror community to experience another great, slow paced, snowy horror film.

Rating: 4 Full Moons out of 5 🌕🌕🌕🌕

[haeddoti]

This is my first blog-post and it is about some of the books I read between year 7 and 11 in my German high school. These books aren’t in a particular order, I just wrote all of them down and took some notes to guide me along. I’ll give a brief summary and then my thoughts about the books.

Without further due, let’s get into the series!

Nr. 1 “Hexen in der Stadt-Ingeborg Engelhardt”

We read this book in seventh grade and immediately after reading (actually during reading as well) we asked ourselves how and why someone thought “Hell yeah, that’s a topic for 11 year olds” since the book is originally listed for grade 5 and 6.

The story takes place in a German town during the Thirty years war, the witch hunts are running wild and the church is all over the place. The story follows a family of four who live in this town, the father is a doctor, one daughter is read-headed and the other a sleep walker. And although the father is greatly needed in this time, the towns people are really suspicious of the family, and they have to flee the city.

First of all, the book was so dense, it was almost unbearable. Definitely not something for children and yet the book won the “Youth literature award” in Germany, so I guess it wasn’t too bad after all. I honestly don’t remember a lot from it, I know we watched a horrible movie about it and I also remember that the pacing(?) in the book was weird, because the first 80% or so took reaaaally long to read through and virtually nothing happened and then in the last 20% everything happened all at once and it was just too much.

Nr. 2 “Am kürzeren Ende der Sonnenallee-Thomas Brussig”

The only (apparent) reason why we read this book was because we had our final class trip to Berlin in year 10.

 The setting is the DDR, East-Berlin to be precise, somewhere around 1970ish. Our protagonist Micha lives in a street which was cut in half my the Berlin Wall and he, unfortunately enough, lives in East-Berlin. He frequent meets with his friends in a nearby park where they listen to West-Music and swoon about Miriam, the neighborhood beauty who is kinda a not-like-other-girls-girl.

All in all, the books is about searching happiness and thinking about how it is so very close and yet never being able to reach it.

It was comfortable to read and overall it was an okay novel. I don’t remember much about it, although I literally read it a year ago. The insight about east-Berlin was cool, and the author definitely implemented own experiences and as someone who grew up in post-split Westgermany it was rather informative and interesting. The quote on the back of the book was also pretty.

“Happy people have a bad memory and rich memoirs”

Nr. 3 “Frühlings Erwachen-Frank Wendekind”

(Springs Awakening)

Oh. My. God. This whole topic was such a BS and I hated every second of it.

The book takes place, once again, in a German Town in a time where there is no Sex-Ed, aka 1900th century, which is also the topic of the book; Sex-Ed gone wrong. Our first protagonist Wendla grows up in a home with a loving, strict mother and far, far away from everything unholy like sex. Our second protagonist, Melchior, is a really smart, really handsome boy who is the top of his class and who likes to read provocative literature which makes him think about masturbation. His best friend is also handsome but really stupid but the social pressure keeps him from dropping out of school- that and his strict, abusive father. Melchior and Wendla fall in love (he hits her with sticks after she metions that she has never been hurt before), have Sex(he rapes her) and after Wendla gets pregnant and dies after an attempted abortion via poisonous plants her aunt have her, Melchior is only mildly devastated. He turns sad, and kinda crazy, after his best friend commits suicide. He has a rendez-vous with the ghost and death itself, he is happy again? I dunno, the whole book was all over the place.

Worse than the book was the discussions we had in class afterwards. One time we had to argue whether it was in-fact rape or if it was just sex. Second discussion we had was about Wendla being a masochist.

The worst thing about the whole topic was the stupid ass movie adaptation.

You think Percy Jackson has it bad? Oh boy. Ohhh boy. The movie plays in the 2000s, graffiti, cool skater boys, rapper-wannabes and early 2000s fashion included. The names stayed tho, cause why not name the male protagonist Melchior in 2001. There are scenes where teenagers, TEENAGERS, go to a brothel. Ah, I forgot.

They are 13-14, book and movie alike.

10/10 would NOT recommend.

Nr. 4 “Der Besuch der alten Dame-Friedrich Dürrenmatt”

(The visit)

(No, not the horror movie)

Oh my goodness, I loved this book.

Picture this. A small town in a German province far away from any major cities with a single trail connection between Hambourg and Zurich, aka the whole length of Germany, where virtually nothing happens. One day, a former resident, comes for a visit. But not just anyone, Claire frikking Zachanassian comes for a visit.

And for blood, because this sixty-something, badass multi-billionaire who got her fortune by marrying a bunch of men who died coincidentally one after the other proposes to the town an offer.

One billion for the head of the man, Alfred the third, who expelled her out of the town after getting her pregnant and lying about it in court after she sued him.

They sent her away in the train, called her a hoe and laughed about her. She lived in a brother for a little while, her son died, and a horny, rich man decided to marry her because why not.  

At first the towns people are disgusted by the offer, outraged by the immoral offer and they straight up deny it. “I’ll wait, Claire says”.

You see, the town is really, really poor. Not only because it is in a terrible location commercially wise, but also because Claire bought every factory in the town and brought them all to a stand still to slowly dry the city out. She planned this revenge.

And you see, the proposal of 500 million split between the inhabitants and 500 million for the industry of the city sounds great if you are on the brink of disaster and hunger and misery. But surely, with such an immoral offer, no one would want to commit a crime? Or would they.

Because, now that I look at it, Alfred really did something horrible… maybe, just maybe I can allow myself to stack up some dept.

And Alfred grew more and more paranoid. Begging Claire to stop this, apologizing on his knees, crying and sleeping with one open eye at all times.

We discussed in our class what we would do. We didn’t really came to a conclusion since we had nothing to compare, not one of us was ever asked to make such a decision. “It depends” was our final answer.

They do kill him in the end. It doesn’t end happy, Claire isn’t happy, but she does give the towns people their money. I really enjoyed reading this book. The female “antagonist” was refreshingly bad-ass and the moral despair was entertaining to read.

We learn that Claire is rich and powerful, but that she lost so much innocence, so much energy to enjoy her life in such young years that, as a reader, you cannot not sympathize with her.

Nr. 5 “Das Versprechen-Friedrich Dürrenmatt”

(The pledge)

Hands down the best book I’ve read in school.

This book is originally a critique by Dürrenmatt about the emerging detective novel genre where everything always works out.

The setting is in a Swiss town, 1950ish, and in the beginning the reader takes on the role of an author who meets a certain Dr. H who works for the police. They become friends and take a ride through the mountains. Upon taking a stop at a gas station, Dr. H introduces us to a seemingly old, smoking, alcohol-reeking man and a scruffy looking girl. The narrator is confused, asks who these people are, and back in the car, we learn that this is the former detective, no-one-escapes-me, super-brain Matthäi.

From that point on the narrator switches and we are now in a third person narrator perspective.

Matthäi is introduced again, this happening in the past, as a hard-working, clean, structured man who doesn’t smoke, drink or disobeys rules. No one really likes him in the office, but they value that he just so good at his job. But because he is so unapproachable, they want to sent him away to Jordan.

The week he was planning to travel there, a young girl is raped and then brutally murdered in a small town nearby. And because he is Mister Superbrain, he goes there to help investigate.

The other officers at the crime scene are (understandably) uncomfortable, they don’t want to talk to the family, or the people there in general. So Matthäi talks to everyone. He is a very calm, collected, cold man. So he meets with the family, tells them what happened to their daughter and is utterly, completely shocked when the mother just blankly stares in his face, and asks him to promise her to find the murderer of her daughter. He is shocked by the lack of emotion in this moment and sees himself in this cold visage of the mother. He promises her, just to get away from her as fast as possible, and drives back to be office.

I don’t want to spoil too much because this book is just so good, but oh my god

I’m in general a sucker for drastic changes in character or demeanor (hence why I liked The Visit so much as well) but his book takes everything to another level. They “plottwist” is so incredibly frustrating and nerve wraking to read, the perspective changes provide so much more depth.

And for the first time I finally read a really intricate, morally gray character.

Nr. 6 “Nathan der Weise-G. E. Lessing”

(Nathan the Wise)

This book was kinda eh. If I had so summarize it as fast as possible it would probably be “Religion and accidental incest”. It is about the three world religions and stereotypes between them, about genocide and also about stigmatization. It ends on a nice note, tho.

The only really remarkable passage of this book is the so-called “Ringparabel” in which Nathan answers to the question which religion is the real, big OG of them all. It is pretty nice and the symbolism is really fitting as well. The beginning of the book is incredibly boring but it does get better in the end. All in all not a total waste of time and money but nothing I would read again.

Nr. 7 “Die Leiden des jungen Werther- Goethe”

(The sorrows of young Werther)

Ah yes, no German class without Goethe. This book is written in a way that lets the reader really seep into Werthers emotion because it is written as a letter-novel. Werther is a young, nature-loving guy who (in the beginning of the book) is just really happy, go-lucky and over all nice. Then he meets Lotte, a young, pretty, smart and book-loving woman who is empathic to all those around her.  He falls in love with her, despite knowing that she is literally engaged and about to marry. She knows he loves her, her fiance know he loves her and literally everyone knows he loves her and they are ok with it? I dunno. Werther has a severe Seasonal-affective-Disorder. He kinda makes it through the first winter after meeting Lotte but never really recovers, even during summer. In the second winter, he can’t take it anymore and he commits suicide.

I liked the book (not only because I can identify with the SAD). In the end we learn that Lotte isn’t as good as we originally think she is; She is actually really possessive of Werther and although she wants him to be happy, she doesn’t think anyone is good enough for him and thus he should just stay close to her. She enjoys the attention given by her husband, who is actually really nice and whom she does love, and by Werther who is utterly and completely obsessed with her.

Opinions on this book split 50/50 with my friends. Some of them think like me and they see the heart break and the desire to move on but ultimately, the way attraction is so so strong. Some other friends, more specifically my Help-with-Maths-Go-to-Guy hated this book with a burning passion. I can see why. The imagery is sometimes a tad too far-fetched and the wording is, in true Goethe-Fashion really hard to read and the sentences are kinda messed up as well.

But in the end it is still the book which opened the way for Goethe to be one of the greatest writers in Europe and I can see why.

Oh wow. This concludes all the books I read thus far. There will be definitely more to come next year and maybe I’ll do another post like this once I read some more.

I hope you enjoyed to read my thoughts and maybe felt inspired to look into one of these as well!

See you soon!

[darkcloud-kcalifornia]

You know, I think it’s time for me to try watching that there new video game movie.  Based on a real old game too.  What was it called again…?  Ah yes, Dragon Quest: Your Story.

 What?  Why in the world would I wanna watch a Sonic movie?

 * This opening is not filling me with confidence for the rest of this movie.  I mean yeah, there’s a lot of story to cover in Dragon Quest 5 if you’re making an adaptation, but that’s, like, why it’d be better to not try and cover all of it.  Like, one movie for childhood, one for young adulthood, and one for fatherhood. Instead we’re skipping past almost all of childhood with a whole lot of exposition thrown in quite clunkily and through game footage.

* Well, give the movie some credit here, they’ve introduced Dr. Agon a bit earlier so as to establish relevance (and yet more exposition…), and he doesn’t have the indignity of Luca and co. having to rescue him from a runaway mine cart.

* Well I’m not entirely sold on character appearance, and the dialog seems to be sped up often to match mouth flaps, but some of the scenery shots are downright gorgeous.

* Suspicious slime is suspicious.

* Aw… no Harry falling in love with a cute nun?

* Man, this whole thing is pretty much on fast forward.  I don’t like it.

* Well, interesting change about the sword being the one in, um, the rich person’s care (look, it’s a long name and I’m horrible with those, alright).  Although this makes me thing that they’re going to skip the rest of the Zenithian equipment and focus on just the sword.  Because if not, well, Luca’d be claiming the sword right about now.

* OK, the metal slime scene was pretty good.  As was Luca being stocked about the cash drop from the Goodybag and Mimic.  Because let’s face it, if there’s two things every Dragon Quest player is familiar with, it’s the frustration of trying to kill those slimes and being short on cash.

* And again we get the ludicrous fast pace with him suddenly getting Gootrude and Purrcy on the team.

* OK, as much as I love the DQ theme and for all that it makes sense for a “starting off on the journey” choice, ending with the triumphant trumpets as Luca comes upon a recently burned city?  The amount of dissonance here is unbelievable.  Who directed this?!

* Um… I don’t think you need to translate the subtitles into English when the subtitles where there to translate something written in English.  Also, they’ve changed the marriage quest to demon slaying rather than magical wedding ring retrieval?

* I know this awkwardness between Luca and Nera is supposed to be cute.  But it’s not.  It’s really not.  I’ll admit though that I might have had a bit more emotional investment here if their previous interactions as children wasn’t brushed past in 3 seconds of sprite work!

* Gootrude has the sword! She must be the Heavenly Hero! …Dang it, I was making a stupid joke, but now I can’t help but wonder what her and Luca’s kids would end up looking like.  Stupid generational plot.

* Alright, time to give the movie credit again.  The failed attempt at drawing the Sword was pretty funny.

* Oh come on, at least let us see Bjorn in the party!

* Again, the supposed emotional connection would be a lot stronger if they didn’t skip past the adventures as a kid with Bianca too.

* Well, if Luca owes Bianca half the reward I guess she’s marrying Nera too now.  Rather naughty of Nera, trying to get two spouses like this. Well OK, to be fair this is more her dad’s decision.

* Bianca is three sheets to the wind.  How old is she supposed to be right now again?  I mean, medieval society, different standards for drinking and all. I just hope that Luca and Nera don’t mind her tendency to get hammered occasionally.

* But seriously it’s a little late to be pulling the “which one will Luca marry” thing after he’s already popped the question to Nera.

* Man, they are seriously trying to push the Bianca possibility with now having a pushy fortuneteller.  I mean not that I’m complaining about the ship, Bianca was my bride of choice in the game, it’s just, well… he already proposed and is quite happy with his choice. There’s a point where it’s a bit too late to indulge in this plotline!

* Although it would be kinda funny if drinking that potion showed him a vision of Deborah completely dominating him.  Never mind that Deborah hasn’t been in this movie yet.

* “Refusing to drink a strange glowing potion given to you by a very pushy magic woman obviously means you’re in denial!”

* *Luca falls into his subconscious*  When did this become a Kingdom Hearts movie?

* Alright, while most of the wedding plotline wasn’t very good, and Luca changing his mind after proposing was kinda infuriating, the old woman being Nera in disguise was a nice touch.

* Only one kid? Before Luca finds out about and reclaims his kingdom?  There’s supposed to be royal twins!

* Also kinda weird how they changed the two-bloodline thing needed for the hero to just having even more Zenithian blood.  But then Bianca was captured rather than petrified, so really we’ve pretty much almost completely jumped the plot rails at this point.

* Ah there’s the petrification.

* Yeah, this version of the years in petrification is kinda sad, but honestly I found Luca being placed in the garden of a family as a supposed protective spirit, being there to watch the family’s young boy grow up, only to be helpless to do anything when the boy is kidnapped my monsters to experience they same kind of horrific slavery he did, the father yelling impotently at the statue he purchased and pushing it over, only for even more years to pass, to be far more poignant. I mean, that scene wouldn’t have even taken that much more time than this one did.

* OK, I kinda like the monster just being able to follow Ollice’s Zoom spell with one of their own to be pretty good.  It’d be nice to see that in the games at some point.

* And the drawing and first use of the Zenithian Sword was definitely cool.

* “That’s just how it is this time around.”  Wait, is Dr. Agon suggesting multiple timelines here?  And that he’s aware of them?  You know, that would be one way of handwaving all of the discrepancies between this movie and the game.  Or even the differing versions of the game.  Different timelines and realities.  Or that could apply to the different games in which the Zenithian Dragon appears; rather than a continuous timeline which wouldn’t make much sense due to the massive differences in the landmasses and lore of the settings, it could be different realities that the Zenithian Dragon has been appointed over by the Goddess, and thus has a split awareness.  …Which in turn suggests more realities through multiverse theory on which girl Luca marries.  The timeline here just got incredibly complicated.

* This… this time travel plotline is being bungled so badly.  And Luca was the one who gave himself relationship advice in the past? Uuuuuuuugh.

* It’s Mada!  Mada is dead!  OK, honestly that one isn’t different at all from the game.

* Sudden reinforcements? OK, I’ll admit I was kinda hoping that Bjorn would show up, but I wasn���t expecting Harry.  At least not after the battle has already begun.  Like, if they were going to toss this one in wouldn’t it have made a lot more sense to have the heroes gather forces before the big battle than have them show up out of nowhere during the big fight?

* Well that’s… odd. I’d crack a joke about the movie crashing, but I have the feeling that plot point isn’t out of the question here.

* OK, so, the movie really is a game world, and “Nimzo” is a virus that was inserted into the programmed final boss, so now everything is going absolutely haywire.  Well I guess that’s what the “Your Story” title is about. It’s the story of the player of the game.  And as Luca is the player avatar, he’s the only one still with any kind of awareness. But Dr. Agon and Mada seemed to have some awareness of the nature of their world, hence their reference to “this time around”.  It’s “this time the game is being played”.  But if things were changed about the basic nature of the game, some of the plot points and so forth, that makes me wonder if the reason for those changes is because this isn’t the base game, it’s actually a ROM Hack. One that carried a virus in it.

* So I was mistaken. It was a remake for a VR system. Oh crap, the virus is going to try to do a mind hijacking, isn’t it?

* No, just a nerd pissing match.  Man, this thing got strange.  And kinda disappointingly shallow for big bad motivation.

 Well, that’s the movie. I guess they wanted to try and do something of an examination of nostalgia and gaming?  But honestly in the end even that plot point was rushed, and even if there were a few hints at something being off that still felt like it came out of nowhere.  Points for effort?  But this was not a good movie.  At all.  I can see what it was trying to do, and that could have made for good storytelling if enough time and care had been devoted to it.  But there just wasn’t.

[baconpal]

here i go talkin bout fuckig anime again

rant time, but like a good one where i’m happy about things instead of angry

so ima talk about and recommend some anime shit, specifically  comfy anime and gurren lagann

i’ll just start it by saying what i mean by comfy anime, cus its something that is more vague than it should be for most people, but for me it’s pretty much anime that i wouldn’t want to binge all together, and instead watch an episode or two when i want to just enjoy something. The kind of show where after watching a little you become really confident that every single episode is just gonna be good, and you can just enjoy forgetting everything and watching it for just a moment of time. 

The anime I consider comfy and also like the most are: 

Girls Last Tour, which i’ve talked about a lot already and i will do it more if you give me an excuse, still one of the best things out there, go watch it fuck you, but that was really good as a once a week thing to wind down my week when it aired.

Non Non Biyori, which is a pretty classic example of just a really slow paced show about a slow paced kind of life. It’s about the best example of slice of life since it’s not trying to be anything else. It’s not comedy or romance or a hobbyist show or anything at all but moments in life, and it’s very relaxing.

And lastly, the comfy anime that made me wanna start ranting in the first place, Yama no Susume. I’m gonna go and talk about it for a while now, but I’ll just give it a general recommendation to whoever cares. The episodes are all short so watch a little and decide if you like it, cus if you like the beginning even a bit, you’ll likely love seasons 2 and 3.

I found this show when my brain thought “anything with a sequel must have at least been good enough to warrant more”, and I looked at the currently airing anime that was a sequel of something and went and watched the first seasons instead, despite coming to enjoy Yama no Susume, I also found that watching things just because they have sequels is a pretty bad idea, cus most of it fucking sucked.

Regardless, I saw season 3 was airing exactly 1 year ago, and began watching the first season, which really shouldn’t have taken long, because it was a short series, coming in at maybe 40 minutes of actual episodes for the entire first season, even still, I watched it over the course of a month, and really enjoyed having such incredibly small amounts of nice content to just have ready whenever. The second and third season are still shorter than most, with 13 minute episodes over regular anime lengths, and also encouraged a slow consumption of just a little bit whenever I felt like watching. It’s been a clean year since season 3 aired and I’ve only now finished the series, despite being fully engrossed the entire time I was watching. I guess talking about the anime is probably a good idea, so here’s the gist:

THE GIST

Yama no susume is a hobbyist anime about mountain climbing. I don’t climb mountains and I don’t use any part of my body besides my arms and my penis so I don’t have much investment in the subject, but it was still very easy to enjoy the show because the premise set up the studio with the chance to produce countless beautiful scenic shots, which is usually the strength of hobbyist shows, one specific thing the artists want to draw really really well. Yama no susume also has a strong story it wishes to tell on top of an easily enjoyable premise and format.

Like most good hobbyist shows, the main character, Aoi, starts of without any interest in the subject, and seems to have a void in her life, in her case, absolutely nothing going on in her life, at all, besides casual knitting. It took a bit for it to sink of for myself, but I had become very attached to Aoi because she mirrored very similarly my own life going into high school, no friends I really felt like i cared about or cared about me, and only a passing interest in some stuff I wasn’t too invested in. The entirety of the show explores how a friend entering Aoi’s life and giving her a hobby to be invested in and meet more people through improves her outlook on life and helps her grow as a person in pretty much every possible way. 

THE NOT GIST (THE ACTUAL STORY)

The first season, being so short, really only features Aoi and her forgotten friend Hinata climbing two mountains total, both of which are pretty much just light hiking that most people have probably done once or twice themselves, and meeting two people in their town with more interest in the hobby.

I’ll also just awkwardly sandwich this here, in between season 1 and 2 is a very short ova where they climb a rock wall with their new friends, but its not anyway near as well animated or interesting as anything else in the series and also has an extensive sauna scene that, again, doesn’t really fit with anything in the series, so if you read this extensive review before deciding you wanted to watch the series, feel free to skip that one i guess.

The second season is where a lot of the show really is, and most of the show being 24 of the 39 episodes, as well as including a nice short film that’s pretty much just 2 more episodes afterwards. With the new, longer, but still short episode time, a lot more mountains get climbed, as well as some actual stuff goin on. After climbing a few mountains, Aoi decides she wants to climb Mt. Fuji, the fuckin big boy, and the 4 ladies go and do that together, when the show pulls out the first of it’s comfy tricks;

the main character does not succeed at their goal they had set and worked towards, and it results in an uncomfortable situation for the rest of the cast. Aoi is unable to handle such a difficult climb, and her friends complete the climb without her, and it pretty much destroys her for a good amount of episodes. Despite definitely being a comfy show, there are a few stretches of episodes in which things are not going well for the cast, and the slow paced scenery viewing takes on a more comber, pensive purpose. After failing at her hobby for the first time, Aoi falls pretty hard back into her original disinterested state of being, and it seems like a lot of her character falls apart. It takes the intervention of Hinata again to reinvigorate her by taking her to the first mountain they climbed, showing Aoi that she has still grown a lot, and that she will improve more with time.

From that point till the end of season 2 (including the movie) the driving idea of the show becomes memories, and how the vague and heart-shaking feeling of nostalgia can be helpful in unpleasant times. The two main girls recall things that occurred when they were childhood friends, like times they were scarred and depended on each other, or a camping trip they took when they were children, and use those memories to fuel further bonding and growth. Even the two secondary girls use memories to reconnect with their friends and families, and it’s a very strong concept to roll with for the slow, one step at a time type of show it is. The season ends with all 4 girls better than ever, and flexing their friendship muscle by making friends with a stubbornly shy mountain climber that parallels Aoi’s original state, and shows her new understanding that having a friend that shares your hobby will always lead to both of your lives being better.

While the first episode is almost entirely about Aoi and Hinata being friends, the second season continues to introduce more characters that Aoi interacts with as she grows more socially capable, with her even getting a job to support her hobby. This shift away from the relationship between the two girls is then made into a proper topic in the third season, where Aoi is pushed to gain even more friends and do things completely separate from Hinata and mountain climbing. This is when the other comfy trick comes out;

The secondary protagonist, Hinata, becomes upset that the Aoi has grown to have more friends and be less dependent on Hinata, and begins to make poor decisions that further put strain on their relationship over most of the season. 

“wow two characters misunderstand each other and it creates drama!!!” isn’t exactly a mind blowing thing for an anime to do, but whenever any problems came up in the first two seasons, they were handled fairly quickly, rarely ever lasting more than one episode, and usually handled with pretty open, mature conversations that you would expect two friends to actually have instead of just being pissed at each other for a few weeks. So when Hinata does not make any attempt to be open about her feelings, and Aoi is unable to grasp the situation, it creates a justified stretch of drama. I really do mean it when i say most of the season is about this, like pretty much from episode 3 till 12 it’s just a constantly building frustration with a lot behind it, and when they finally can have a simple, honest conversation, it really feels nice.

After that there’s one final episode with a more expected case of the two not understanding one another, and having an honest conversation about it. This specific case is a good capstone to the series, as they discuss how you really don’t know much about even your best friends, but talking about each other honestly, and desiring to know more about each other is where a lot of the fun in friends is. 

With that, the series is done for now, but who knows where it’ll go from here. I heard a lot of good about season 3 as it was coming out, and still see a good amount of support for it, and season 3 ends with “See you again” as opposed to “The end” like the other two season. I’m not gonna get my hopes up cus there’s already a lot there and they explore 3 very important ideals that really resonate with me. But if they could make a fourth season that brings in an entirely knew concept to look at, I’d be really happy. 

Anyway if you read all that and still haven’t decided then just go fucking watch some Yama no Susume, see if i care.

THE GURREN LAGANN PART

Ye how about a complete tonal shift from comfy anime to loud action stuff?

SO i saw Promare finally after missing a bunch of chances to see it, and honestly I don’t have all that much to say about it. Despite being 2 hours it felt really short and like I got no time with the characters, and they were all pretty shallow characters that I didn’t really have any attachment to even on a surface level. Near the end there’s a big drill and a mech with a face on its chest with absolutely no reason or explanation, and because of that I came out of the theater really just thinking “i really want to rewatch gurren lagann” instead of caring that much about promare.

Now I’m rewatching it for probably the 8th time and it really impresses me how much more I like it each time. When i was a stupid baby and watched it for the first time i did what a lot of stupid kids did, watched for a while, really liked kamina, and stopped watching when the he was gone. Obviously I’ve watched it fully many times since then, and while younger me probably would have loved the second half, where simon fills the role kamina did, the me of today really doesn’t care for the second half that much, and I find myself watching just the first half of the show and stopping, or watching the second movie instead of the tv version. The first half of the series is just really strong to me, so I’m just gonna talk about that a little bit and then go to bed I guess.

The art and sound is so fucking good in gurren lagann holy shit. Everything is so springy and malleable, and the mechs are just really big people who are equally malleable and expressive. The characters are all unique and fun, even random background characters in the villages are strong. The use of that very specific light green color that spiral energy has begins with this show, and trigger would forever try and fail to use it as well as gurren lagann did, though LWA uses it pretty well. Every little thing feels so right that I’m just amazed the show keeps up such quality for the whole first half...

EXCEPT THAT ONE EPISODE WHERE IT FUCKING DOESN’T

Along with always assuming gurren lagann isn’t as good as I remember, I also somehow manage to forgot how absolutely miserable the fourth episode is. Not to say that i forget it’s bad at all, i couldn’t forget that episode 4 sticks out as a really not good episode and bring it up as a weird point of contention for the series, but watching it again it’s really baffling how awful it is.

The visuals just fall apart, the shots are lazy and don’t read well, the animation is choppy and unpleasant, the characters look really stupid, and the newly introduced characters never get any proper cuts to introduce themselves with and make a good impression. The voice actors also don’t seem quite as into it as with the other episodes, presumably because they had to watch episode 4 while voicing it, and couldn’t feel the same energy the rest of the show has. 

I can really only assume it was an outsourced episode or something to that effect, and near the end, when gurren laganns absolutely kino combination cuts that would be reused for the next few episodes are first shown, it becomes even more jarring how bad the fight afterwards looks, and how bad the episode is in general. It’s a shame that such a good show has to have such a sudden and massive drop in quality, but it’s interesting in it’s own way.

KAMINA THOUGH

While i did say i’m not as into the kind of character simon becomes in the second half, kamina himself is still undeniably a strong character, and I always appreciate how dopey and unmanly his face is despite being the embodiment of excessive fighting spirit, rash thinking, and unapologetic horniness.

Another strong kamina related thing that always hits me right in the feels is the episode titles, which for the first 8 episodes, are all lines that Simon hears kamina say at some point, which comes is used as a really strong twist, when in episode 8, kamina’s last words are used as the episode title, and not presented as the title until the viewer already knows the meaning of those last few words. From there the episode titles become things Nia says until episode 15 where simon is finally able to step up to his destiny and say his own damn episode title, but Kamina really does get the most out of such a simple concept.

Related to Kamina, I really enjoy how the very very first part of the show sets up episode 8′s strength even more. Besides being a really weird segment where simons voice and design are kind of off and dai gurren’s design isn’t quite finished and also boota is a dude, it sets up the concept of “The man who has yet to realize his own destiny” before introducing simon. The show doesn’t do anything to hide the fact that this “man” is simon, but also never clearly states it, so it’s not hard to understand people who gravitated towards kamina more and assumed that kamina would have a great destiny. Many episodes began or ended with a statement from the narrator saying that “the man” still was not aware of his own destiny, until episode 8, where the narrator claims  “Now the man will realize his destiny”, and before the episode is over, Kamina is gone, and without every stating it, the identity of “the man” becomes clear in a rather brutal process of elimination. Another minor aspect to how gurren lagann builds itself up so well.

Only other thing i really have to say about it is I still really appreciate stories where the protagonist steals things from the villains to grow stronger, or just generally makes use of things his enemies used, creating their own style out of disparate pieces. I hope to make a strong case for that kind of stuff when I can finish more of my comic. Read my comic.

And, as always, if you read all this shit you’re cool and we can be friends. We won’t be, but we could be, and that’s nice to think about sometimes. Have a wonderful night.

[hockeyluver-1995]

Chance Meetings- Morgan Rielly Story Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Word Count: 3.1

Trigger: talks about being in a manipulative relationship.

December 26th, 2018

Morgan message me his flight itinerary the day he left for Vancouver. He was scheduled to arrive home early in the morning so being the good girlfriend that I am, I decided to head over to his place so that I could bake him some treats as well as surprise him with some lunch.

Morgan had given me his spare key, so That way when he got home I would already be there and breakfast would be ready, and then we could spend the rest of the day in bed in each other’s arms. Technically we had only spent a couple of days apart, but for some reason, it felt like an eternity.

I had just taken out the healthy muffins that I made out of the oven when my phone started ringing.  I looked at the caller ID confused as to who was calling me from an unlisted number, curiosity got the best of me and I clicked answer.

“Hello?” I questioned as I brought the phone up to my ear.

“Babe,” said the voice that I recognized right away. My heart dropping into my stomach the second I heard his voice. The voice that at one point in my life, I loved hearing and it was the voice that I craved hearing.

“Lucas,” I replied with an annoyed tone, “why are you calling?”

“I made a big mistake, I should have never let you walk away,” he took a deep breath before continuing on his speech. “What I did to you was incredibly stupid, and I lost the best thing that had ever happened to me because of it,” Lucas said as he sniffled into the phone, obviously, I could help my think that he was acting slightly emotional to mess with my head.

I always thought that Lucas would make a better actor than hockey player solely based on the fact that he was good at manipulating me into doing whatever he wanted.

It took me stepping back from the situation and leaving him for me to realize just how much of our relationship had traits of being kind of emotionally abusive. Now that I am with Morgan, I look back at my relationship with Lucas and I realize that it was never 50/50. It was always about him his wants, his needs, and his dreams.

“Are you kidding me right now, you have had over a year to say this but now that I am finally happy and am in love you phone me expecting me to just forgive you and get back together with you? Like you didn’t shatter my heart?” I yelled as I started pacing back and forth.

“Are you also forgetting the fact that YOU cheated on me with countless women for two years? You made me believe that we had a future, that I was the one who you were going to spend the rest of your life with, we even talked about our future children.”

I didn’t even get to finish what I needed to tell him when he tried to interrupt me.

“Hold on it gets worse… when you got caught you tried to manipulate me into believing that you would change. But I guess what they say is true ‘once a cheater always a cheater’.” I took a deep breath and continued “Morgan makes me feel like I am a priority, and he most definitely does not make me feel like it’s an inconvenience to love me.”

“Hails, I promise you that I have changed and that I am a better man than Morgan. I bet he doesn’t know how to make you feel the way I did.” He replied a cocky tone coming out in his voice.

“You are unbelievable!” I screamed into the phone frustration evident in my voice, as I paced back and forth.

“Morgan is more of a man than you will ever be. He makes me feel as well as treats me 100 times better than you ever did. And you better believe that means in the bedroom as well.”

“And unlike you, his actions speak louder than his words. And he truly loves me and doesn’t just make empty promises to get me into bed. I bet you’re just jealous that he got the girl and he is a better hockey player than you. Who plays full seasons in the NHL, instead of being a player who spends most of his season in the AHL. The fact that you think you can phone me and manipulate me into leaving him, proves to me why I will never get back together with you or any other guy for that matter.” I said as I smirked into the phone. I knew what I said was harsh but in my mind, he deserved it, especially after everything that happened between us. I finally dared to tell Lucas everything that I have been bottling up since the night I left him. I honestly believe that being with Morgan has created a sense of self-confidence within myself, and has showcased a strength I never knew I had.

“This isn’t over.” He muttered as he hung up the phone.

I had just hung up the phone when Morgan walked into the apartment. He was hoping that I would already be at his house when he came home from the airport. Even though it had only been a couple of days he had missed me like crazy and he couldn’t wait to have me in his arms. A big smile formed on his face when he noticed my boots and jacket hanging near the front door. But what caught Morgan by surprise was the fact that I didn’t rush to greet him as soon as I heard the front door open. My plan originally was to surprise him by wearing one of his dress shirts and jumping in his arms. However, the phone call from Lucas threw me for a loop. Right away Morgan could tell something was off and walked further into the apartment.

“Babe!” He said rushing over to the couch where I had the blanket wrapped tight around my body, creating a sense of comfort.  Once sitting down beside me he pulled me into his arms so that my body was in his lap and my head was buried in between his neck and his shoulder. “What happened? Are you hurt?”

I took a deep breath and inhaled Morgan’s cologne before muttering one work “Lucas”

“Oh babe, what did the asshole want?” He questioned as he kissed my forehead.

I looked up into his blue eyes before putting my lips on his neck and mumbling,  “I love you and I am so thankful that I am with you. You are one of the best things that have ever happened to me.” I pulled away and kissed him on the lips pouring every ounce of love I could muster up.

“I love you double infinity Hails, but what did he say to make you so upset?”

I quickly sat up straight in his arms and started explaining exactly what Lucas said.

“He said that he saw the post about us that you made on Instagram. He begged me to take him back, saying that cheating on me and letting me go was the worst mistake he has ever made. I then yelled at Lucas saying that he has no right saying those things and that you make me feel like a priority and not some chore he hates doing.”

Morgan looked me in the eyes pulling me closer to him if that’s even possible.

“I promise you that I will never let him hurt you again. You are my girl and you are stronger than he even knows.” He said smiling, before continuing “You are beautiful on the inside and out. You are everything I could ever want in a teammate and my partner. I can not wait to see what our future brings us and I will not be letting you go without putting up one hell of a fight.”

“Mo, know that I am not crying because I miss him. I am crying because I’m so angry with him because he still thinks he can play with my emotions and manipulate me into being with him.”

Morgan nodded his head as he placed his hands on my face pulled my chin up a little so I was looking in his eyes.

“I hate what he did to you. I hate the fact that he hurt you. But it’s his loss, and because of his actions, he lost the best thing that has ever happened to him. Because of his actions, I found you, and I fell in love with the love of my life. Because of him, I get to hold you in my arms, I get to hear your contagious laugh that makes me smile every time I hear it. I get to see the way your eyes sparkle when you do the things you love and most of all I get to show you every single day how much I love you.”

A tear rolled down my cheek as I listened to Morgan’s words. His fingers reached up and wiped away my tears as he slowly placed his lips on mine.

When we pulled away I buried my head in his neck as he pulled me even closer to his chest. In one swift motion, we were standing up as he carried me into his room. He slowly placed me onto his bed as he handed me his Apple TV remote, “choose any movie you want, even a romantic one and I will be right back.” He said as he leaned down and kissed me once more before heading towards the kitchen.

I was still searching through Netflix when he walked back into the room with a basket full of junk food, and a bouquet. They were the flowers that were slowly becoming my favourite flowers, every time he gets me flowers they are the same bouquet. My face lit up at the fact that he must have gone to the grocery store quickly to purchase everything needed for our day in bed.

He set the flowers down on the bedside table before he pulled out his phone connecting it to his portable speaker.

I couldn’t help but giggle as Morgan played the song ‘Whoever Broke Your Heart’ by Murphy Elmore.

I was not prepared for what happened next... Morgan started singing the song while looking deep into my eyes.

As he was belting out the words he slowly started to sway his hips and reached up to take off his sweater.

I’m sure all you could hear were my giggles as I watched Morgan remove one piece of clothing at a time at a teasing pace as he serenaded me.

Morgan grabbed my hands pulling me into his arms, as we slowly started swaying to the beat of the music. I fell more in love with him at this moment as he sang the lyrics in my ear... lyrics that seemed to be written for us, they seemed to fit our situation perfectly.

It must have been a funny scene to watch, us swaying to the music. Morgan only wearing his boxers and I was wearing one of his long sleeve shirts that just covered my bum.

It’s moments like this, moments when we are so consumed in each other that time seems to stand still. Moments that I wish could be caught on tape so that we could have video memories of just how in love we are, for us to look back on, to reminisce about the beginning stages of our lives together. Memories that we could show our children one day so that they could see just how in love their parents are and exactly how much they love each other even before they got married and had children.

Once the song was over Morgan picked me up in his forearms and spun me around before kissing my lips.

Seconds later I was being thrown onto the bed as he dove on top of me laughing.

“God, I love you.” I murmured as I patted at the space beside me in bed.

He rolled over so that he was not squishing me, laughing as he pulled me into his chest. Giggling I grabbed the remote and clicked play as we started watching the movie ‘the proposal.’

“What are your plans for our 9-day break at the end of January?” Asked Morgan as he looked down at me, the movie playing in the background.

I shifted my position so I could see him better, “well I have the week off so I was kind of hoping you would tell me what we would be doing.”

Morgan’s face lit up at my reply “well we are either going to San Jose for the all-star games or Vancouver.”

“Well, I may have jumped the gun a little. I asked Jess and Tom a couple of days ago for time off when I noticed the big break in your schedule. So I am free to follow you where ever you go.” I said as I blushed a little bit, waiting to see his reaction to the fact that I just assumed he would want me to tag along on his break.

Morgan smiled even bigger than I thought possible as he kissed my lips.

“Perfect! Because I think my parents love you more than me at this point. They couldn’t stop talking about you during the Christmas break.”

I started giggling once I heard that his parents wouldn’t stop talking about me. “Well I’m guessing the same thing will happen with my parents, they can’t wait to meet the guy their daughter is in love with,” quickly adding, “the last part is their words, not mine.”

Morgan laughed as his eyes lit up, at the fact that my parents were just as excited to meet him, as he was to meet them.

“I know we are having junk food, lounge in bed all day kind of day to forget about Lucas but we do need to talk about the fact that we play Vancouver at home on Jan 5th.” Said Morgan as he absentmindedly rubbed his hand up and down my arm an action that made me feel calm.

“Please do not worry about me, because I’m not worried at all. Just play your game because I know Lucas and he will do anything to get under your skin. You are a better player than him, he is an AHL player who is fighting for his chance to play in the NHL.”

“Hails you also don’t need to worry about me. I already know he is jealous of me, I got the girl of my dreams and I am living out my dreams of being an NHL player.

“You’re slowly becoming a star in the NHL, working your way to being one of the best defensemen in the league. How many goals and assists do you already have and it’s only the end of December?”

Morgan quietly mumbled “13 goals and 31 assists,” before saying, “I’m having my best year yet, and it all started when I met you. I believe it’s because I have you in my corner supporting me, loving me, and cheering me on every day.”

We were laying in bed enjoying each other’s company as we ate junk food and talked.

I was scrolling through my Instagram feed when I saw that my best friend from Vancouver had just gotten engaged.

“Omg,” I squealed, as my smile grew wider as I thought about my best friends future wedding.

“What?” Questioned Morgan as he smiled at my reaction.

“Look,” I said as I tossed my phone towards Morgan. “My best friend Brittney just got engaged!” I exclaimed as I lunged into his body, catching him off guard.

“Uff,” he gasped trying to catch his breath as I knocked the wind out off him with my elbow.

“Whoops,” I giggled as Morgan took some deep breaths trying to regain his normal breathing pattern.

“Can I look at the picture now? Or should I be prepared for you to take my breath away again.” Morgan teased as he grabbed my phone once again, to look at the photo.

“Well you should be used to be taking your breath away, it’s a daily occurrence.” I joked as I settled back into Morgan's arms as he held my phone out in front of us.

“Wait, that’s my friend Ryan from back home,” he stated as he zoomed in on the picture.

“No way,” my eyes widening at the fact that Brittney’s fiancé was one of Morgan’s friends from home.

“This is so crazy!” He shook his head at the fact that we had a mutual friend.

“I can’t believe our friends are engaged and it took you moving to Toronto for us to meet. Can you imagine what would have happened if we just happened to be at the same party when you were living in Vancouver.” He kissed my forehead and pulled me even tighter.

“I think we met when we were supposed to meet. I have a feeling that if we had met when I was in Vancouver, I would have tried to avoid you. For a while, I was avoiding every male like they were the plague, just because of what happened with Lucas.” I said as I looked up at Morgan, slowly leaning in for a kiss.

“So how did you meet Britt?” Asked Morgan, as he still couldn’t believe that I knew his friend Ryan.

“We met my first year at UBC, we were both studying at a cafe when she sat down beside me. We started talking and we hit it off so she invited me into her friend group and I guess the rest is history.”

“I’m kind of mad at Ryan!” Stated Morgan shaking his head smiling.

“Wait, Why?” I questioned.

“Because he didn’t even try to set you up with me, he must have known you were the perfect girl for me.” His answer caused me to giggle as I said, “well you are going to have to take that up with him.”

“I’m going to text him right now,” Morgan said as he grabbed his phone from the side table.

I quickly sent Britt a congratulations text, and layback down in Morgan’s arms enjoying the rest of the movie.

Finally at peace after an emotionally draining afternoon, I slowly fell asleep in the comforts of his arms.

[takerfoxx]

The Rise of Skywalker Review

All right, new year, new decade, and all that jazz. Now, I do have a few things I wanna say about reflecting back on where I was and where I am now, personal growth and all that, but first, I have some major I need to get out of my system, something that’s been eating at my mind all week, something I really need to sit down and dissect to properly suss out my thoughts and feelings.

And that thing is this: what the fuck happened with The Rise of Skywalker?!

Now, just for the record, I’m that lapsed Star Wars fan who grew up with the original trilogy, who had a full shelf of EU novels that I read and reread over and over until their covers fell off, who spent untold hours replaying both of the Knights of the Old Republic games, was majorly let down by the prequels and became disillusioned by the franchise as a result, who reacted to the news of Disney’s acquisition of the franchise with cyncisim, who thought that The Force Awakens was decent but otherwise substance-less knock-off of A New Hope, who was bored to tears by Rogue One, who skipped Solo entirely, but who actually was surprising engaged and receptive to the subversive themes and new places that The Last Jedi took the franchise even if it was very flawed structurally and thought that it was the best Star Wars film since Return of the Jedi.

And hell, let’s just state my reasons right now. The Last Jedi came out at a time when I was just so tired of people trying to recapture lightning in a bottle with once-great franchises that had lived on long past their expiration date with trying to pass off clearly inferior knock-offs to their original installments as sequels. I mean, it can work, sure. Both of the Creed movies followed the Rocky movie formula pretty closely but were still great, and even if it didn’t click with me the way it did with other people, Fury Road was a fantastic film. The thing is though, both of those movies were still being handled by their original creators, specifically Sylvester Stallone and George Miller, while my beloved Star Wars and Jurassic Park had become divorced from their daddies and were now being handled by people who just. Didn’t. Get it.

And then The Last Jedi came along and was all, “Shut up about bloodlines, they don’t matter! Your main character is not the descendant of some already established character, she’s just some rando Force-sensitive that caught up in all this and decided to answer the call, so let her stand on her own! The Jedi were a well-meaning but immensely flawed, so leave them in the annuals of history and stop venerating them! Same with your heroes! Also, your Resistance has its hands dirty too because it’s a fucking war and war makes monsters of everybody while the little people suffer, sometimes you need to listen to the people in charge instead of being a hothead bucking the system, and the intimidating villains in black are in truth a bunch of insecure man-children playing dress-up to make them feel better about themselves and are pretty pathetic until they take that last step and become actual threats because that is how fascism works!”

Do you realize just how refreshing all of that was? Oh my God, is the Star Wars franchise actually…moving forward? Are we getting new stuff that’s not hampered by George Lucas’s unbearably hackneyed writing?

Yes, the whole Finn and Rose sidequest contributed nothing to the plot and ultimately went nowhere. Yes, the whole Poe vs. Admiral Holdo had the looming question of “Why doesn’t she just tell Poe that she’s got a plan instead of doing everything to set the team rebel off?” which undercut its message. These are major problems, I acknowledge that. The thing is, they are easily fixable problems that would have been smoothed out by a few more script treatments. It sucks that they weren’t, but as for me, they were roadbumps, not dealbreakers. I noticed them, I saw that they were major problems, but they didn’t make me angry, and I liked what they were trying to say enough for me to still be with it. And I felt that all the Luke/Rey/Kylo stuff was gangbusters (yes, I loved cranky, disillusioned old Luke. I know Mark Hamill didn’t care for it, but that’s fine, it worked great for me), so I ultimately left feeling pleasantly surprised. As if in, it was a flawed but very refreshing experience, one that said things I had been feeling for a long time and took things to interesting places that I actually wanted to see play out. I even got choked up when Luke let himself fade away when feeling absolutely nothing when Han died the previous film.

Unfortunately, that seemed to be a minority opinion, with many other Star Wars fan outright detesting it, sometimes to a pretty gross level (you know what I’m talking about). So when JJ Abrams was brought back on board to try to salvage things for the final installment, my reaction was, “I’m going to hate it, aren’t I?”

Still, I knew I was going to see it anyway, just to say that I did. And…welp.

…

Dafuq was that?

All right, all right, now before I continue, I need to acknowledge something. First of all, I have nothing against JJ Abrams as a person or even really as an artist. From all accounts he’s a cool guy who’s been taking all the backlash he’s been getting with a commendable amount of maturity, and he was placed in a very unenviable position by taking the reins in the midst of a very volatile situation. Plus, he had set a ton of things up in TFA that TLJ burned to the ground. Granted, it was a bonfire that I thoroughly enjoyed, but as the person watching his ideas just get cut off, that must have been frustrating watch. Like, what was he supposed to work with once he was brought back on after Colin Trevorrow had gotten the boot? And on a side-note, they really need to stop bringing Colin Trevorrow into big blockbuster franchises.

And if that wasn’t bad enough, we had the tragic passing of Carrie Fisher, which, in addition to being a terrible loss in general because she was a wonderful person that we’re all the poorer without, this movie was supposed to in some way revolve thematically around her, much like the TFA did with Han and TLJ did with Luke. But with her gone, they were just left with footage and recorded dialogue from deleted scenes from the first two films, which is next to nothing to go off of. Now there’s a debate to be had about whether or not it would be appropriate to CG her face onto a different actress, and I do get them feeling that doing so would be ghoulish…but they kinda already did that to bring Tarkin back in Rogue One, so…

Even so, that really sucks, and as awkward as the Princess Leia scenes are as a result, it isn’t their fault, so I’ll leave it at that.

And finally, it must also be acknowledged that a lot of the things I’m going to criticize them for were present in the original trilogy, and were just as awkward then. The OG movies weren’t perfect, folks. We’ve come to accept these flaws, but they were just as clumsy asspulls back then as they are now.

All right, now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, I actually want to start off on a positive note, specifically talking about the stuff I liked.

Let’s begin with the thing that I consider to not only be good, but actually kind of great: the relationship between Rey and Kylo Ren. Their weird Force-link in TLJ was one of the few new ideas that everyone seemed to like, especially since neither of them could really control it and were equally befuddled by it. It’s just a cool idea, a new aspect of the Force we haven’t seen before, and it’s slowly built upon, actually affects both the plot and the characters, and leads to some great scenes between the two of them.

And you know what? I was actually surprised by how much I liked these two together. After the wooden pile of bleh that was Anakin and Padme, I was bracing myself for more of the same. But as it turns out, Daisy Ridley and Adam Driver have an incredible amount of chemistry, and Adam especially was able to pull off the whole tortured bad boy who’s trying to be a villain but feels endlessly conflicted in a way that Hayden Christensen never could (though to be fair, Adam had way more to work with). So giving them that weird link where they’re forced to interact at different points despite being galaxies across from one another is a fantastic idea.

And I was happy to see that not only was this idea not walked back on, they actually built on it. Without giving too much away, there’s an amazing scene where they actually have a lightsaber fight despite being in two completely different locations and not really knowing where the other is, with the camera jumping back and forth from each other’s perspective and items from each other’s surroundings keep getting thrown into the other’s area and it’s honestly really great.

There were also a lot of visuals that were pretty great. The whole indoor lightning of the Sith Planet was neat, as was the flying stormtroopers, and that festival was pretty cool, and…

Actually, come to think of it, most of the scenes in this movie are, when viewed in isolation, pretty good, and could have worked if they had been buffeted by, you know, proper buildup, actual pacing, and taking the time to let events have weight.

But that leads us to this movie’s biggest failing, the problem that bring the whole thing crashing down. And that is it will just. Not. Slow. Down!

Seriously, don’t take a bathroom break, because if you do, you’ll come back to find everybody on a totally different planet doing something completely different, and the plot point you left on is completely in the rearview. It’s exhausting how quickly this movie jumps around from place to place, where we get a look at a setting and characters that might have been interesting if we got to spend actual time with them, only to drop it and we’re onto the next part. This isn’t a story, it’s a list of bullet points! It’s a three hour highlight reel of a whole-ass fourth trilogy, one that could have been cool to watch if they had chopped it up into three parts and fleshed them out into three movies. Hell, I’ll tell you where to end each one: Rey vs. Kylo on the Star Destroyer, Rey vs. Kylo on the wreckage of the Death Star, and the actual finale. Expand on the stuff in between, flesh things out with actual, you know, character development and consequences instead of zipping around, trying to come up with as many places as they can to cram into Star Tours’ randomizer.

And that’s what this basically is, an overly long Star Tours ride! Now I like Star Tours just fine, because it visits places that hold actual meaning due to being properly developed in actual movies, but these places just left me feeling hollow. And while we’re on the subject, did we really need another desert planet, ice planet, and forest planet combo? Spice things the fuck up! Say what you want about the prequels, but at least they tried to take us to cool new places.

And you know what? I’m going to say it. This movie is actually worse than the prequels. Not because it’s nearly as clumsily written and woodenly acted, or because it’s dragged down by dumb attempts at comedy; it’s none of those things. But at least the prequels were trying! George Lucas might be totally inept as a writer and should not have been given free reign, but there were attempts at things like proper plot and character development, pacing, plot twists, mystery, building things up and paying them off. Just go read the novelization of Revenge of the Sith. It’s fantastic! Same plot, same events happening, same conversations, but the dialogue is reworked to give the characters actual personality and it’s narratively told in an awesome and creative way and it’s overall just a great book. So George Lucas’s movies had the framework of a good story, he just wasn’t the right person to tell it.

In contrast, this movie has actual good acting, and the dialogue isn’t anywhere nearly as corny, but it’s just so unbelievably basic. It’s surface level writing, with barely a hint of cleverness and very little personality other than what the actors are about to wrangle out through their performances. But structure-wise, other than to expand it into a full trilogy, I don’t see how anyone can turn this mess into an engaging, single-movie narrative. So much happens, and it just feels so empty.

And…okay. Let’s address the Bantha in the room. Let’s talk about Palpatine.

Why is he back? Why? Just…why? He doesn’t need to be back! He doesn’t! It’s stupid, it’s hackneyed, it’s not even explained! I mean, there’s an offhand mention of cloning, so yeah, it’s feasible, it just makes no narrative sense! Hell, the fucking opening title crawl just plain says, “Yeah, he’s back. No reason, he just is” and goes on from that. And apparently he’s been behind everything that’s happened, like Snoke and Vader’s voice in Kylo Ren’s head and stuff, because things just can’t happen without being masterminded by someone I guess.

Really? This is the best they could come up with? I know TLJ cut off a lot of their plot branches, but goddamn it, this is the best you’ve got? Resurrect Palpatine? They do remember that the first two movies from the trilogy barely had the emperor as a presence, right? Vader carried them all just fine! Just run with that! Have Kylo Ren be the main antagonist! Have this be able his ascension to actual mega threat instead of Darth Vader cosplayer. If you want Ian McDiarmid to ham it up in the robes one last time (and hey, who wouldn’t?) just give him a cameo! Like, a holographic message to any potential successors Kylo Ren is looking for. Have him be the devil on Kylo’s shoulder in a is-he-real-is-he-just-a-hallucination sort of way. Make him something tempting Kylo Ren to fully embrace being the new Sith Lord, something Kylo has to overcome if he wants redemption. But don’t bring him fucking back! That’s just so, so stupid.

And Rey being Palpatine’s granddaughter kind of pisses me off. Her being revealed as a nobody from nowhere in the last film was great! I loved that idea! But no, let’s just retcon that whole business because we’re trying to apologize for the only one of these movies that had any balls and everybody has to be the descendant of someone important. Even fucking Lando gets a long-lost daughter in this! No, I’m not joking, he totally does.

Now, could Rey’s Sith heritage have worked? Sure! In of itself, it’s a rad idea, one that could have been used to explore all sorts of awesome themes…if that had been their plan from the beginning instead of a cheap attempt to replicate Empire’s big plot twist. But let’s face it: they threw it in as a desperate attempt to placate the fans. There never was any sort of plan. Abrams made the first movie with the sole intention of trying to recapture that nostalgic feel and fucked off, Rian Johnson took over with no notes and decided to do what he wanted, Trevorrow got fired, and Abrams got brought back for PR reasons because hey, people liked his movie, and he had to scramble to piece something together! Damn it, Disney! You literally have infinite resources! Hire someone with actual creative talent!

Oh wait, you did, and people hated it. Fuck.

So yeah. Rey’s parentage? Total waste, raises more questions than it answers. Chewie’s apparent death? Total waste, because he was actually on another ship! Though you could Force sense these things, Rey! Dark Side Rey in the trailer? Total waste, just a Force vision. That whole bit with C-3PO potentially sacrificing his entire identity? Total waste. No one seems to care, he gets no say, and after his memory gets wiped it’s treated as comic relief. Yeah, one last look at your friends indeed, Threepio. Some friends you have there. Oh, except Artoo’s got your memory backed up, so it doesn’t matter, just like everything else.

Oh yeah, and fuck Chewie’s medal! Who was really asking for that?

What a mess. What a disjointed, soulless, pandering mess. What a waste of potential, squandered on nothing. Bleh.

Oh well, at least we still have the Mandalorian. I’ve started watching that and it’s really cool so far.

[thereturnofthedirtyblog]

10 Best Episodes of Ghost Adventures, According To IMDB

BY ANTHONY FERTINO – ON SEP 02, 2019 IN LISTS

The Travel Channel has strongly expanded its programming regarding the paranormal. It’s a controversial subject, which is curious, given how commonplace religion is. However, the validity of the phenomena is often hindered by reality shows like this. The reenactments are silly, and Zak Bagans is a hopelessly theatrical character.

Still, Ghost Adventures gradually shed its more embarrassing habits and focused primarily on collecting evidence. It’s left to viewers to decide upon the legitimacy of said evidence. This is a niche genre, with company like Sightings and Paranormal Witness. But for believers and casual viewers alike, Ghost Adventures is usually a fun and breezy hour. For the former, the encounters can sometimes be genuinely creepy. Here’s how fans rated this long-running staple of ghost hunting.

10 CRESCENT HOTEL - 8.8 (S18, E7)

All of the more interesting episodes on this show have a compelling setting. Learning the dark, true history of various establishments is pretty entertaining. In this episode, the Crescent Hotel is revealed to be the home of a real-life villain. A man named Norman Baker used the location as a hospital to prey on cancer victims.

He delivered a false cure, made of lethal nonsense, and made millions. Zak opens up about losing his father to cancer a month prior, which is surprisingly frank and stirring. Also, the majority of the episode is comprised of investigating rather than interviews. The GAC uses a good variety of technology, more than usual. The EVPs and SLS oddities are definitely unsettling.

9 IDAHO STATE TUBERCULOSIS HOSPITAL - 8.8 (S18, E12)

Surely, it makes perfect sense to take a location as creepy as a tuberculosis hospital and make it an Inn. Although, The Shining’s Overlook Hotel did cast an eerie shadow over that, too. The owners of this episode’s Inn, tragically, are revealed to have lost two children.

No matter your position on the supernatural, this show consistently deals with genuine grief and loss. It’s later suggested that one of the kids is reaching out, seemingly providing intelligent responses. But this would be benevolent contact. The most unnerving evidence is an EVP recording of outright, frustrated screaming. It’s a disturbing sound, even for non-believers.

8 OLD LINCOLN COUNTY HOSPITAL - 8.8 (S11, E4)

In this episode, the crew travels to Tennessee to investigate an abandoned hospital. That’s simply an innately creepy setting, anywhere. There’s a reason it’s used in so many horror movies. But this episode has a really interesting turn of events—the police get involved. Briefly, while attempting an interview, the police arrive at the scene of filming.

A local commander in the police department describes potential paranormal activity, which can’t be a more welcome testimony. Still, a single piece of evidence can make all the difference in fan appreciation. The presence of a potential shadow figure is a compelling piece of footage. The episode is paced well, and the crew also uses some interesting new gear.

7 HAUNTED HARVEY HOUSE - 8.9 (S11, E5)

It’s always interesting when this crew is the first team allowed to officially investigate an establishment. At the very least, it adds some credibility to them, given that certain locations have particular reputations at stake. This episode features two very old buildings in Las Vegas—New Mexico.

And once again, apparent shadow figures are the most alarming and memorable encounters in the episode. Two dark, fleeting shadows whoosh past a doorway. It’s some pretty startling footage, akin to anything in a Paranormal Activity movie. But the GAC also collects a wide range of numerous voices, and they utilize a good range of tech.

6 STONE LION INN - 8.9 (S14, E1)

The adventurers travel to Oklahoma to investigate a small bed and breakfast, that was once used as a mortuary. Now, the owner runs a murder mystery show there, and is purportedly enacting genuine satanic rituals. Besides this silliness, there’s some really interesting history. The episode recounts the true story of a train robber’s corpse ending up as a mummified tourist attraction for decades.

It’s fairly disturbing, with real photos of the remains on display. However, this episode also compiles some pretty incredible evidence. This time, it includes alleged poltergeist activity. Doors apparently move on their own, and a camera’s tripod is completely knocked over. Poltergeist footage is the crown jewel of such investigations, and fun to dispute.

5 THE WASHOE CLUB: FINAL CHAPTER - 8.9 (S16, E7)

This location was featured in the original Ghost Adventures documentary from 2004. That history is inherently appealing for longtime fans. It’s especially moving that two people who helped with the previous Washoe investigation have since passed on. And according to some strangely coincidental and intelligent communication, the team believes those friends are reaching out.

It’s one of the more personal investigations, with intriguing visual and audio evidence. We see a strange SLS figure, the full spectrum camera captures an odd mist, and there’s a long sequence of alleged footsteps. Also, a brief visit to a candy shop provides some surprisingly good humor, which rarely works on this show.

4 LEWIS FLATS SCHOOL - 8.9 (S16, E8)

In this episode, the investigation is set at a school that burned down and became a taxidermy-filled steakhouse. This selection almost gets straight to the evidence, rather than the typical half-interview formula. And it’s pretty intriguing, with EMF spikes, intelligent audio responses, and even the classic horror staple of fluctuating lights.

But the most alarming moment is the extraordinarily distinct shadow behind a doorway. Clear enough to suggest a living intruder, who apparently left some animal bones. That kind of threat is equally disconcerting as any alleged ghost. Still, after a couple of thrown objects, Aaron is left by himself. He’s scared out of his mind by some strange sounds, later jumping at his own reflection. It’s both compelling and pretty amusing.

3 IRELAND'S CELTIC DEMONS - 9.0 ( 10/31/14)

This two-hour special appropriately travels to the birthplace of Halloween, and tells a brief origin for the holiday. It’s a fun way to get in the mood for Halloween, an inviting time to watch this show. The guys undergo an entry ritual to appease an old Celtic goddess, and there’s a story about a demonic cat. It’s all a bit much, but the specials usually are.

It’s just the thing to deter more casual audiences. But familiarized fans are on board as long as the evidence and history are intriguing. The Irish setting is fascinating, and although the first half doesn’t offer much beyond an EVP scream, Loftus Hall delivers. Built in 1666, the team captures an almost stereotypical ghost in a doorway, a white mist. They also get an extensive SLS figure apparently standing on Aaron’s shoulders.

2 HALLOWEEN SPECIAL: ROUTE 666 - 9.1 (10/29/16)

This was a two-parter taking place at the DeSoto Hotel and Goatman’s Bridge. So, the special is, in fact, available to stream on Hulu, albeit by those individual titles. This was a pretty stunning special. It had some incredible evidence, and an experience that convinced Jay Wasley’s wife to quit the show. Undoubtedly, the DeSoto Hotel includes some of the most memorable moments in the show.

Shadow figures compel Billy to actually call the police at a cemetery. A ceiling fan is thrown in plain sight, and the light above it turns on by itself. Also, a wire’s tugged in equal view of the cameras. Goatman’s Bridge is unfortunately set in the woods, where evidence is even more unreliable and unclear. Worse, the physical effects are totally indeterminable as evidence. However, there’s still some interesting audio.

1 HELL HOLE PRISON - 9.2 (S12, E8)

Prisons have long been a terrifying, awful place, regardless of any purported paranormal activity. It’s a concentrated population of immoral, vicious people. Guards and prisoners perpetuate violence within those walls. But in this episode, the crew collects SLS evidence of some remarkably friendly types.

It may sound silly, but an entire band of ghosts appears to perform on a stage. They react with intelligent responses to the team’s communication. It’s a profoundly strange, amusing, and impressive piece of footage. If you believe in the supernatural, and this show, then it’s easy to understand (understand) how it achieved the highest IMDb ranking of all.

DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH THE TOP 10 LIST ?

#HauntedParaClassics

[johnlockficclub]

Discussion Recap - Author Q&A!

Well, JFC crew, we’ve reached the end of another fabulous fic! Thank you so much to everyone who read along and participated in the weekly discussions - you all are the best.

And of course, a huge thank you to @swissmissing for writing The Baker Street Nativity in the first place and for coming along to our Author Q&A to share some insight into her writing process and background to this fic. Questions and answers are below the cut as this got quite long!

And finally, thanks once again to @frodosweetstuff for allowing us to use her artwork for these update posts!

Happy holidays everyone - may you and your loved ones be safe and happy this festive season! xx

1: Why this AU? What got you started on it? @ewebie 

 I saw the movie and with MF in it, of course I immediately started thinking of how it could be a Johnlock AU.  I do that frequently anyway: imagine Johnlock versions of stuff. I just watched a few Netflix Xmas movies recently and I am still thinking of how to turn them into Johnlock AU's. I see the world through Johnlock-coloured glasses. Is that healthy or normal? IDK.

2. Would you ever consider publishing your fanfic? @norburylibrary 

No. First off, the story is obviously cadged from a copyrighted screenplay. To publish it for real, as an original work, I'd have to scrub the names and characters so that they don't interfere with BBC copyright. That part should be feasible, but the story itself is too close to the Nativity screenplay. As for any of my other fics, the non-fusion ones, I don't think I've written anything that could stand on its own without the Sherlock association. One of the huge assets of fan fiction is there is a built-in character background and setting. I'm not up to rewriting to the extent of creating something that could be published as an original work.

3.  What do you enjoy writing most, humor or angst and why? @elwinglyre

I can do both, but I guess I'm more drawn to angst. I think humor is harder to pull off, for me at least. I'm not a naturally funny person. I have to think hard to come up with funny situations and lines. Confession: In some of my fics, there are certain punch lines that were actually written by my beta readers. I think Sherlock and John - in fact all of the Sherlock BBc universe - lends itself more naturally to angst anyway. although there are humorour parts in the eps, I find them more geared towards angst.

4.  Was it confusing at all having seen the movie to then switch the roles?  When writing it. @sherlock-nanowrimo

Yes, totally confusing at first! I started out with the "natural" roles, with John as the teacher and Sherlock as the assistant, but it wasn't working for me so somehow I just got the idea to try it the other way round. Once I started down that path though, it wasn't confusing for me. I was worried throughout that it would be confusing for readers. But everyone who commented and said they had seen the movie, also said the switch wasn't hard for them to deal with.

5.  When you write is it because you get a fic idea or for some other reason? Like stress reliever or for doing something fun? @tildathings 

Good question. I always want to write. I get a great feeling of satisfaction when I write something. Especially when I finish a piece. It's a big shot of dopamine for me. It carries me for a long time, sometimes days. BUT I can't force myself to write. I tried that one year with nanowrimo and it was not a good thing. So I can really only write when "the muse" grabs me. When I get an idea that sticks with me for days and weeks. And with this fic, it really came alive and almost wrote itself, once I was on the right track.

6. How much do you base your writing on the show and how much on your headcanon? @travelingwithoutthedoctor 

This is a problem too, as I haven't gone back and watched the episodes in a really long time. Many of the eps I only saw once in the first place. I have the feeling that the fandom circles you travel in tend to create a fancanon that pretty much replaces the actual canon. So that's something I struggle with. I actually try when I write to imagine and hear the TV characters speaking and acting things out, in the hopes that it makes it closer to how they might actually be in those situations. I suppose that's unavoidable. I'm sure I do have an image of the characters in my mind, and I write from that. I just hope they are pretty aligned with the original characters from the show.

7.  I thought you did an incredible job making Sherlock a teacher for young children credible. That wasn't something we'd think of Sherlock doing, and you made it work. What did you take into consideration when doing this? @elwinglyre

Woo boy, that's a thing! He is so completely unsuited for this position. I had to justify him being in that position, however, so I kind of hand-waved something. Honestly, it wasn't my priority. I was just trying to create Johnlock moments. I mean, I think he's actually quite good with children. We've seen that on the show with Archie. I think it would depend on the kids.

8.  I’m curious about the speed of writing. How quickly do you get a chapter done? @vitruvianwatson

Once I get going, I can usually do about a chapter a week. My chapters tend to be 2-5K. 

9.  The UST, miscommunication and angst of this fic was deliciously frustrating, and a lot of us were yelling at them to just sort themselves out. If that was the hardest part about reading it, I'm wondering about what was difficult to write in this fic?  Were there certain sections or characters that you found challenging? @lediona25

I was honestly following the pacing of the movie, pretty much. I did need to add some scenes. I tried to pace it so that there was a romantic bit about at the halfway point, and another one for the big payoff at the end. One challenging bit was the dog. I wasn't sure whether to include him, but once I did, I kept forgetting about him. I kept having to go back and remember where the dog was and who was taking care of him. I don't have a dog so I was just doing what I've seen other people doing with their dogs. They leave them tied up outside of shops and restaurants all the time so I figured it was okay. Again, it wasn't really a priority. A lot of people commented that they liked the dog in there though, so I'm glad I left him in.

10. It was perfect casting!  We were talking about it during the movie - like with Greg as the headmistress. @sherlock-nanowrimo

That's one of the best parts of doing a fusion, for me anyway, is the casting.  I love discovering how characters map onto each other. Sometimes it's astonishing.  I HAD SO MUCH FUN WITH JIM!!  I didn't want to make him actually evil or a real threat. It always gives me massive anxiety when Moriarty shows up in a fic because often truly awful things happen then. But I wanted to keep this in line with it being a kids' movie. And to be fair, I didn't really need to change all that much from the movie bad guy anyway. That nativity play he put on was insane! And I actually was just teaching one of my classes last year about universal story plots such as the hero's journey.  (Yes, I'm an English teacher.) 11.  One of your ficlets suggests some pretty unpleasant stuff re: Jim's backstory. @bluebellofbakerstreet

Jim's backstory. I kind of imagined he and Sherlock had been rivals at the conservatory and Jim had tried to derail Sherlock with drugs. Perhaps somewhat successfully.

12.  What the hell is the story with Sherlock and whatever he did to Seb Wilkes?! @ewebie

I don't know either! LOL that is actually something I like doing in fics because, again, I like it when fics do that: hint at something but not elaborate and leave it up to you to decide what was actually going on.  I guess maybe that's frustrating to some people but for me, it gives fics depth and realism.  It's like in some fics where you just hear about a case in passing but the details are never fleshed out. I was using it to show that Sherlock had made poor decisions with kids in the past, so this thing he did with taking the kids to the studio wasn't out of character.

13. John... as a classroom assistant. How did you see him ending up there? Our conclusion was that... lost people just sometimes end up places @ewebie

I don't recall if it's explained in the fic or not, but I actually had something in mind for that. He was invalided out of the army and bumming around with nothing to do, feeling useless. His good friend Mike, who was also a teacher, recommended him to Greg as a classroom assistant. No idea if that would be allowed in the UK but here in Switzerland it's frequently done. Usually a retired person will be brought in as a classroom assistant. This keeps them active and engaged, and is a big help to the teachers.

14.  We loved the whole scene with Moriarty at the end when Mycroft pops out and saves the day.  You did a bang-up job with that.  When you're finishing a story, are you one those "I've planned it all out" writers or stream of consciousness writers. Let's go with the flow? @elwinglyre

In this case, the ending was written for me. I just followed the plot of the movie. Usually, though, I do have the ending in mind from the start. It's usually pretty much a sex scene, lol. The whole point of the fic is usually, how do I get these two together? 

15.  Oh! The sex! Is that easy for you to write. I have the hardest time with that. Is something your really get into? @elwinglyre 

True story (which I also told on one of my guest slots on the TPP): I didn't use to be able to write sex scenes. But I wanted to. So I literally would copy sex scenes from fics I liked. Just like, typing them out word for word. This got me used to writing those words and those acts on my screen. Then I tried writing my own. I think I sort of have a reputation for writing awkward-realistic sex scenes. I'm not aiming for that, it's just how they come out. It's a mix of, again, imagining how the characters would appear and act and speak in those situations, and also I guess how I would feel and want things to be.

16. We have a lot of people in this group who are just starting out writing fic or are thinking about writing something, do you have any advice to new writers? @lediona25

I'll just say what we started out talking about: Write for yourself. Write what you want to read. You will always have an appreciative audience. I see so many writers get discouraged because they don't have massive hits and kudos, and they just give up. I think most of the popular writers in fandom have been around for years. This may be their third or fourth fandom. They've been writing in real life. Experience takes a long time to build up.So write for yourself. The rest will come. And... at the moment, it feels a bit like there's less readers than 2 years ago, so really really don't be discouraged.

Thanks to all those who asked questions and to @swissmissing for her thoughtful answers! :)

[honeylikewords]

Hey, K, I know it’s been days but you still feel like infodumping about Spiderverse? :o

pettyprocrastination said to jonedwardbernthal:Hello yes I loved into the spiderverse with my heart and soul please info dump I require sustenance

YES I DO WANT TO INFODUMP ABOUT SPIDERVERSE THANK YOU FOR ASKING

okay okay so i’m gonna put this all under a cut for those who haven’t seen the movie and wish to remain spoiler free, and i’ll also put a couple images so that mobile users (who sometimes automatically see the post, apparently?) to warn them to scroll past!

(pls enjoy my crappy ms paint warning banner ghskhgdk)

SO FIRST OF ALL I WANT TO SAY that genuinely, this movie changed my life. I have never been as excited or happy about a movie as I was with this one, and can find few (if any) flaws with it. I would have to be hyper-nitpicky if I wanted to point out anything wrong with it, but overall, I gotta say, this movie inspired me, made me cry, made me laugh out loud, made me shake and jitter with excitement.

I should point out that, yes, the visuals can be kinda jarring, especially for sensitive people like me who react to flashing stimulus and abrupt movement very poorly, but I honestly LOVED the visual aspect of the film. The character design is incredible, the animation is so unique and stunning, and every single person has this wonderful individuality in the way they look and move that it just blows me away. This movie is already a frontrunner for an Oscar in the animation category, apparently, and it’s easy to see why.

The writing is also impeccable, with a quick pace and genuine humanity to it, and it feels so bright and alive! The way people talk is so full of character and personality, and Miles’ codeswitching is adorable and fun to listen to, and everyone has such a special and unique personality that comes through how they speak. The voice acting is INCREDIBLE and the array of the cast is SO awesome and I LOVE everyone who was in it!

I literally am so excited about everything that I’m having a hard time keeping this post linear and sensical, but I just! Love it so much!

Some people criticize the film by saying that it’s not really the “first black Spiderman movie” because Miles “shares the spotlight”, but, honestly? That didn’t come across to me at all. This movie felt entirely centered on Miles. Yes, Peter B. Parker played a big role, but, like, every movie has supporting characters and co-mains. I understand the frustration, but that’d kinda be like saying that Captain America: The First Avenger isn’t Steve’s story because Peggy gets screentime and so does Bucky. But I also do get where people are coming from and I find the frustration very valid.

But I LOVE all the spider-people, and they didn’t actually overwhelm the movie. Peni, SpiderNoir, and SpiderHam all took backseats. They were fun additions, but didn’t ever detract from the experience of this being Miles’ story. Even Gwen didn’t derail the film, or even Peter B.! They all stayed in their lanes and moved Miles’ story along, more like the wheels propelling him than roadblocks obfuscating his progression. 

I loved every one of the characters, and I got so attached to all of them; Miles’ family really stands out to me, because they are such strong and loving characters, and it is so, so sadly rare to see loving black families portrayed like this. Jefferson, Miles’ dad, is allowed to be flawed without ever crossing the line into “bad dad” territory. He’s allowed to be wrong but still love his son and be doing the absolute best for him. Even Miles’ “bad” uncle, Aaron, made me cry and love him. When Aaron died, I was horrified (mostly because, I mean, god, we really did not need to see another black man getting shot by a white guy...), but they also never demonized Aaron, or downplayed the tragedy of his loss. He was heroic, even in his mistakes, and I think that was really noble on the part of the storytellers. 

The movie just feels so lived in and loved and human, and you can tell that it’s just a work of art and love and passion. It’s a game-changer. I legitimately consider it the best Marvel movie ever made, on par with Black Panther in terms of artistic value and importance. It’s the fun of Thor: Ragnarok and the art and significance of Black Panther rolled into one, unique, amazing bundle that has forever set the bar for how I want movies, especially movies intended for families and children to be.

“Anyone can wear the mask” means something. It may sound like a cheesy cop-out, but it means that we don’t have to look up to Perfect Pillars Of White Heroism as our standards. It means black children from Brooklyn are heroes. Jewish people are heroes. Women are heroes. Asian people are heroes. Even Miles’ parents are heroes, and it shows the wide gamut of good people and what we owe to each other. While neither Rio nor Jefferson Morales-Davis are “superheroes”, they are legitimate heroes, doing their part to make the world a better place.

Also, check THIS:

Just saying!

Anyway, moving on; the jokes in the movie are awesome, and my family has been throwing them back and forth ever since we saw the movie. SpiderHam’s t-pose ascension into the black hole and “keep this, it’ll fit in your pocket” had us in tears. SpiderNoir and the Rubik’s cube? Incredible. Peter B. crying in the shower? Artistry.

AND NOW FOR ME TO TALK ABOUT THE AFTER CREDITS SCENE BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN HOLDING IT IN FOR S O   L O N G

When I read that Oscar had a cameo in the movie, I needed to know. It was the only spoiler I allowed myself to know about, and when I heard he was going to be Spider-Man 2099/Miguel O’Hara, I flipped. I read nothing else about the scene, and wanted to go in blind, but I researched Miguel and, well, you know, I fell in love!

His scene was SO good and SO funny and I LOVE Miguel SO much, you have no idea. I am SO excited for him to be in the next movie (fingers crossed!) and can’t wait to see more of him. I do hope they give him more screen time, because he’s a great character, and because it’d be amazing to have a Latino Spider-Man AND a Afrolatino Spider-Man! And because, you know, more Oscar is always ideal.

I love, love, love Miguel, and Oscar was so funny (he has amazing comedic timing and such great range, omg), and I am desperate to see more of him. I haven’t stopped bombarding my poor friend Cydney with love and affection for Miggy in, like, two weeks. I’m sure she’s sick of it by now. Also, I kinda wanna write stuff about Miggy, lowkey, as self-indulgence, but for now I’ll just keep that foolishness to myself lol.

Miguel O’Hara Is My Boyfriend Now ghdkhgkldhg

Anyway, the movie is chock-full of amazing things, both from an artistic/cultural standpoint and from a Marvel-fan standpoint: so many easter eggs and little surprises, so much amazing writing, so much amazing character design, just!! So! Good! Please go see it immediately, because I’m itching to see it again and don’t know how I can resist going in for a second watch.

Also, Peter B. Parker is Jewish and it’s canon and if you want to step up and fight me about it, feel free to, but I will kick your ass. I will. Know this. Jewish Spider-Man FOREVER, FOOLS. No one is allowed to thirst after him if they also ignore his being Jewish or disrespect it, so if you wanna love him, you gotta love his Judaism too, or I’ll fist-fight you behind the Denny’s at 3 am and knock you the hell out.

also john mulaney’s cussing outtakes for spiderham are the funniest thing on earth and i’m crying 

OH and I have the art book for the movie and everything is so *kisses fingers like an Italian cook* B E A U T I F U L! And the soundtrack? BOY I TELL YA I was listening to it for WEEKS in advance even when there were only three songs released and some of those tracks are, like, incredibly powerful, whooh. 

Anyway GO SEE SPIDERVERSE. I LOVE IT. ALL OTHER SPIDER-MAN MOVIES ARE DOOKIE BY COMPARISON.

I have more I could say but I’m so excited I’m bouncing around and going hog wild dgkgdhgkg i love spider verse

[jmsa1287]

HBO's Adaptation of 'My Brilliant Friend' is Intense, Rich & Painful

hi i got to write about HBO’s adaptation of “My Brilliant Friend,” which will please fans of the book series but it may be harder for newcomers to lock into it.

Adapting novels into TV shows or movies is nothing new. Hollywood has been doing that for decades — it's a proven formula that shows when a beloved book is transformed to the screen it can be a massive success. HBO alone has built its empire on source material, namely the novels "Game of Thrones" and more recently "Big Little Lies."

It's likely the network has another hit on its hands with "My Brilliant Friend," based on the incredibly popular Neapolitan book series by Elena Ferrante. The show may not have dragons or A-list celebs but makes up for that by channeling what the novels do so well. It packs a powerful and emotional punch and, for better or for worse, transports you to a small working-class town in 50s Italy.

The first season of "My Brilliant Series," which debuts Sunday on HBO, follows the epic friendship of two young girls Elena Greco, a.k.a. Lenù (Elisa Del Genio plays her as a girl and Margherita Mazzucco as a teen), and Rafaella Cerullo, a.k.a. Lila (Ludovica Nasti as a girl and Gaia Girace as a teen). They're both exceptionally intelligent girls drowning in a town who don't know how to handle their gifts. Their parents would rather put them to work than further their education and nurture their gifts. On top of unsupportive family life, the girls witness violence on almost a daily basis. The two watch as their community destroys itself from the inside out; mostly by men. The men in this drab town outside of Naples physically assault each other and even kill each other over petty squabbles. The women, too, get into fights and scream obscenities at each other, imprinting toxic behavior on the impressionable children who watch them.

We watch as the girls grow from elementary school students to teens. As they age and become aware of the painful world around them, we watch as their friendship blooms and diverges. In one episode, Lenù and Lila are reading "Little Women" together until the book falls apart. Years later, the duo are in competition with each other while Lenù continues schooling (much to her mother's chagrin) and Lila is forced to work in her father's shoe shop. Nevertheless, despite receiving formal education, Lila consumes every book she can get her hands on, learning Latin and Greek by herself and surpassing Lila.

"My Brilliant Friend" is a faithful adaptation of Ferrante's novels. A co-production between HBO and Italy's RAI and TMIVision, the limited series is a rich and painful story brought to life by director Saverio Costanzo, who helms all eight episodes. He also co-writes, alongside Francesco Piccolo and Laura Paolucci, bringing the girls to life. It sticks to the book's framing device, using voiceover from a much older Lenù, who begins writing this story when she gets a call from Lila's son that she is missing. The voice over can be annoying when it feels like Ferrante's prose is literally cut and pasted into the show.

Despite its lavish production, "My Brilliant Friend" feels small, contained and modest. Most of the first season is set in the small town, which feels incredibly claustrophobic. It's a relief any time the characters get to venture outside the town. The show's slow pacing is frustrating and nearly every scene is full of intense dread — as if any moment someone could snap and cause harm to the two young protagonists. Even in the show's happier moments — specifically a New Year's celebration — the fear of something truly awful happening is always in the back of the viewer's mind.

That may be part of the experience of watching the devastatingly sad "My Brilliant Friend," but a show too drenched in despair (not to mention one with a 56-minute runtime that is in no rush to get to where it's going) is a hard hang. But those who have consumed the books will surely be devout to the series. The show is also exceptional at weaving its themes into its narrative — class and money, or lack there of, play important parts in the story of the two girls. Getting their hands on a book is revolutionary. Convincing parents to enroll them into school is as challenging as climbing Mount Everest. Both girls come from a working class family and often bump up against the children around them whose families became rich off the fascist-era black market. In the back half of the season, Lenù and Lila are still impressionable teens but it feels like a revolution is bubbling.

Who knows how audiences who haven't read or heard of the books will receive "My Brilliant Friend." It's doesn't pander to American viewers — the show is in Italian and is subtitled; an unfortunate turn off for many. Though it's not a home run, there's something hypnotic about the show. If you invest time into Lenù and Lila's friendship, there will be a rich payoff in the episodes to come.