#it's all coming together i'm making the connections i'm digesting the themes I See What Is Happening Here

[pochapal]

they cannot see beatrice because beatrice exists only as a rhetorical tool in their contradictory arguments. in other words, beatrice is furniture.

[pinkeoni]

WillEl Narrative Mirroring: Presenting Themes of Sexuality

If we consider powers as a means to present themes of sexuality, then looking at Will & El and how they mirror each other in narrative can reveal different angles on this topic and how the two sides of the coin come together to create a balanced whole.

Very very lengthy discussion of sex, sexuality, sexual assault, and child sexual abuse below the cut.

Will and El being different genders is important to their narrative mirroring, because they are displaying the difference between expectations in regards to male and female sexuality. Let's start with El and what her story says about female sexuality.

Layering the subtext behind supernatural elements is both practical and ethical, and I honestly applaud the Duffs for choosing to go this route rather than making it more explicit from the start, and instead sewing in details along the way. It helps keep the story digestible, allowing for a story like this to be shared to a wider audience while also not forcing their incredibly young actors to portray potentially very traumatizing circumstances.

I'm not the first nor will I be the last person to talk about all of the csa coding regarding El, Brenner, and the lab, especially here on tumblr. I was actually sent an anon awhile back linking a blog post back from 2016 that analyzed this exact thing.

"Eleven's interactions with 'Papa' are laden with coercive, coded language, intentionally leading viewers to make sexual abuse connections beneath the surface of the experiments we are shown. Eleven, vulnerable in a thin hospital gown, is told to "go deeper" and to ignore the men watching her perform. She is told the monster wants her, to go farther, "not to turn away from it." This language is intentionally loaded."

Girls are often forced into their sexuality at a young age, usually for the gratification of men

Young El, in hardly a hospital gown, is being forced to utilize her powers for the sake of Papa Brenner and other men in the lab. The sexuality/power connection is being established very early on.

And even once El has escaped the clutches of the lab and seems to find safety—

And before I have fingers pointed at me, no I am not trying to vilify Mike for this moment nor any of the boys for wanting to use El's powers to find Will. It's more complicated than that. The boys were young, their friend was missing and in danger, and they were excited by the prospect of a real life superhero being able to save their friend. I'll also get into how Mike is a victim of this forced heteronormative relationship much later in the post.

But still, even without meaning to, the boys are reinforcing the role that El is expected to fulfill, which is to use her powers and sexuality in service to the men in her life

Something impressive about that blogpost I linked earlier is the rightful calling out of how gross miIeven is way back in 2016, when the two were considered America's cutest couple by the general public.

"Crucially, in the climax, after Eleven's body is once again used for others, Mike promises her a home, and Eleven shows a glimpse of light, is almost comforted. She'll have a family, she'll have safety. Promise? No, Mike says. She'll have their mother, but while she's wearing his sister's dress he explains she won't be a sister, that he wants Eleven to meet his desire for a girlfriend. How could he possibly understand that more boundaries and a boyfriend is the opposite of what she needs?"

Girls oftentimes do not see many options outside of their sexuality

Starting in season 2 El has two modes of thinking: girlfriend or superhero. Her line of thinking isn't helped much by Hopper, who keeps her isolated from outside world. And like the boys, this is a complicated situation. Hopper is keeping El inside for the sake of her safety, lest the government catch her and lock her up again, and either use her or kill her. Still, this isn't good for her personal development.

Whereas Brenner was the sexually abusive dad who forced his daughter into adult roles at a young age, Hopper is playing the role of the overprotective dad who doesn't want to see his little girl grow up, something that continues in season 3. In his eyes, he is keeping El protected from the men of the outside world who are likely to want to take advantage of her, and keeping her locked in is his way of preventing that. But doing so is damaging to El's psyche in ways he may not realize.

So El is kept locked inside with some of her few windows to the outside world being spying on the boy who wanted her to be his girlfriend, and spending the entire day on the couch watching romantic soaps. Her options regarding freedom are skewed.

When El gets her first taste of freedom and leaves the cabin, she's in girlfriend mode. We know this when we see her go to Mike and she misreads and becomes jealous of his interaction with Max. Now I won't deny that El and Mike do have genuine care for each other, but here she ditches a boy that she hasn't seen in almost a year because he seems to have found another girl to fill that girlfriend role.

Having been hung up on in the void and replaced, El changes trajectory: superhero.

I do want to point out and emphasize the importance of El going to see Terry before this moment. El is not a robot that is programmed for sex and powers. She is very much human, and we see her desires for family and the life she could have lived, which is her motivation to seek both Mama and Kali.

Kali, another woman with powers who had been mistreated like her, offers El an alternative— use her powers against the men that have hurt her. When El sees that Kali is seeking her power as a means to use them, El leaves to save her friends and family.

I once again want to reiterate again El's humanity and her heart. El isn't returning to Hawkins simply as a means to become Mike's girlfriend and to become a superhero. She is doing so because she wants to save the people that she loves. Still, El's resolve for the season isn't super ideal given her overall arc. She is effectively fulfilling the roles that have been charted for her since the beginning. She learns that she can be a superhero and a girlfriend! Yay!

With danger out of sight, El seems to be spending her time doing the only other thing she thinks she can do, kissing Mike in her room. An activity which is described by Hopper and the rest of the party as being "unhealthy" and "bullshit."

So what is the solution? Completely remove her sexuality as Hopper aims to do?

We now come to my favorite friendship in the whole show, as well as the most important character in El's arc—

Max doesn't suppress El's sexuality or enforce it onto her, but rather is the first person who allows El to explore what she wants, offering her assistance but allowing El to lead the way. Brenner, Kali, Hopper, and Mike have all wanted to shape El into what they wanted her to be. For Brenner, a weapon. Kali, an avenger. Hopper, the perfect daughter. Mike, the perfect girlfriend. Max wants El to be whatever El wants to be. (God I love the elmax friendship so much)

Like I said before, Max does not aim to strip away El's sexuality like Hopper does. Hell, I wouldn't even say that she wanted to keep El from Mike. Hell, Max was even asking El if Mike was a good kisser after El had dumped him. Max is the one who offers to give El her moms Cosmo magazines. She isn't keeping El in the dark about sex and sexuality, but offering her a road map and actual information in order for El to come to her own conclusion about what she wants from it. El can look at pictures of Ralph Macchio and use her powers to spy but also enjoy shopping, listening to Madonna and reading comics.

When El is pushing her powers to find Billy, something that El choses to do of her own volition, it's the girls in her life (Nancy and Max) who advocate for her to lead the way while Mike is the one who wants to control her. And yes, once again the situation is complicated, Mike isn't doing this to be an asshole but out of concern for her safety, but needless to say he isn't beating the controlling boyfriend allegations. And this displays another facet of female sexuality—

Men often feel insecure when women exhibit ownership over their sexuality

Mike, who previously advocated for El to use her powers if it meant helping someone, is now actively pushing against it when it's El in the driver's seat and not him. And maybe Mike was right and El was pushing herself too far. And maybe he was concerned out of guilt for pushing her the first time, but would it also be too out of left field to say that Mike equates his part of his self worth on how much El needs him?

So maybe now I’ll talk about Mike

Mike really isn’t trying to be this malicious, manipulative guy who is using El for sex. Really, he’s not. Mike instead is a young boy who is going through some rather tough internal struggles of his own, and unfortunately brings El into it with him.

Mike is enforcing the heteronormative relationship onto himself just as much as he is doing it to El

I personally read Mike as gay and that plays into this analysis. Mike found a girl that he cared a lot for and everyone around him assumed that he must have feelings for her, so he played the role of the straight boyfriend. When I see Mike making out with El in her bedroom, I see a gay boy constantly trying to become attracted to his own girlfriend. Maybe if he keeps kissing her, maybe it’ll do something for him.

Keep in mind that Mike believes that that’s what El wants him to be, he’s not forcing onto her something that he doesn’t think she doesn’t want. He may have kissed her first, but then El was the one who tried to kissed him at the Byers house. Mike is mistaking El’s own confused feelings for genuine ones.

Being El’s boyfriend was Mike’s way of giving El what she needed, a way to be useful while simultaneously giving him a way to be normal. But what happens when his true feelings are starting to become harder to ignore?

Remember that Mike wasn’t writing “Love, Mike” when he believed that El was doing okay on her own in Lenora and making new friends. It almost makes me wonder if Mike would have said “I love you” to El if she had told Mike she was in distress.

But then again, we do see El in distress in front of Mike and yet Mike still can’t bring himself to say it. It isn’t until El is quite literally on her deathbed that Mike finally works up the courage.

In season four we have El regressing into her superhero or girlfriend mindset, with a third option added— monster.

A pinkeoni analysis that mentions El’s superhero/monster dichotomy???? SHOCKER!!

When girls are not seen as sexually desirable, they oftentimes feel monstrous as a result

El doesn’t have her powers anymore, and Mike no longer sees her as worthy of being a girlfriend, which means that she must a monster. This is a thought that is reaffirmed through El’s treatment from her classmates, and later El’s intrusive memories regarding the massacre. The only way El knows to escape this monster label is to regain her powers using NINA. This is what El knows, how to become a superhero. This is how she becomes desirable again.

I think that Max’s distance from El is a good contributing factor. Not the only one, but a main one for sure. El no longer has that guiding force, and there isn’t a girl in Lenora that understands her disposition and seems willing to take her under her wing. Sure she has her new mom Joyce, who is usually on the phone. Or her new brother Jonathan, who is usually stoned. And her new brother Will, whom we see try an give El support only for her to shut him down with “friends don’t lie.”

So El goes through NINA, gets her powers back, learns she isn’t the monster after all, oh and her boyfriend can say “I love you” now. And yet, as El realizes at the end, it’s not enough.

I promise this post is also about Will too

Now is the part of the post where we shift gears and finally talk about Will. El has more screen time than him, so there’s more to cover. I also felt like discussing her first laid some important groundwork in regards to how Will mirrors her narrative.

El showcased a lot of facets regarding female sexuality. Will covers aspects of male sexuality, but specifically gay male sexuality, which is an important distinction.

What does Hawkins feel about gay men?

Yeah, it’s not looking good.

Gay men are oftentimes perceived as predatory and dangerous

Will’s sexuality is practically an open secret. Will goes missing, and the town’s first thought is that he was taken by another gay man. Troy doesn’t say it directly, but the implication behind his words is that Will was raped and then killed, thus feeling the need to clarify that the man behind it was “another queer.” Gay men rape little boys and throw them into quarries, or so the town thinks.

The eighties is also such an important set piece for this narrative because the entire show takes place right in the midst of the Reagan Administration and the AIDS epidemic. A young gay boy dies and its suspected that another gay man killed him. The government is eager to sweep under the rug what actually did it. The anniversary of Will's kidnapping is Reagan's 1984 reelection date to the day.

Heterosexual men are treated differently on the basis of their sexuality

Well, duh. But I did want to highlight the differences between gay Will and his evil-straight-name-twin, Billy.

Billy wears his sexuality proud and openly. Based on Max's dialogue in season 3 we know that he has sex with girls often. In his introduction we are immediately shown girls ogling him. He arrives in town and is instantly liked and regarded. He catches the eyes of the hot moms in town and he's liked by the other guys.

Oh, and he's racist, violent, abusive, and overall a total sack of shit.

We see Billy's sudden rise to popularity in the same season that we see Will's incessant bullying and him being branded "Zombie Boy" by what seems to be the entire town. Even Billy who's been in town for like a day is already calling him "the freak." Will is sweet, kind, friendly, wouldn't hurt a fly, but he's the weird homo whereas Billy is the cool straight guy with the nice butt.

Gay men's sexualities are often suppressed

So now we get to the part that exhibits the WillEl mirroring, as well as some “Will has powers” theoretics. I guess your willingness as a reader to continue forward may depend on your feelings toward Will with powers. I may lose some of you, or maybe I may even swing some skeptics with my explanation. As I say in most of my posts: bare with me.

If El's sexuality and powers are being forced upon her, then Will's sexuality and powers are being forcefully snuffed out.

Let's take a look at Lonnie Byers, in many ways similar to Papa Brenner and in many ways his antithesis. Both abusive fathers with silver hair, Brenner is the obsessive parent who wants his fingers all over his daughter while Lonnie is the distant parent who wants nothing to do with his gay son. Joyce's dialogue "Lonnie said he was queer. Called him a fag." indicates that his homophobia probably has something to do with his distancing. Lonnie's verbal abuse of Will was likely a method of trying to snuff out his queerness. And when that didn't work, he left.

(and if you wanna get theoretical you could say that he had connections to the lab, knew about Will's powers and was trying to get rid of them, but that's just speculative)

A big part of season one is the fact that the entire time, Will was in his own house. He was spending his time running and hiding from the monster that was in his own home, the one that wanted to kill him. And the only time he ever expressed himself, the only time he ever used his powers—

—was when his loving and supportive mother encouraged him.

But also keep in mind that almost every time Will tries to speak with his mother through the lights, express more of himself and use more of his powers, it usually attracts the presence of the monster. Will continues his cycle of running and hiding until it doesn't work anymore, and we get what is perhaps the most overt sexual assault imagery in the show that even little fifteen year old Robin Pinkeoni picked up on in 2016.

Season one ends with Will experiencing sexual violence, and in season two we see how this trauma is encroaching on his everyday life, as well as being stalked by the same man that took him and shoved a vine down his throat for the sake of reproduction. He follows Will to the arcade. He follows him while he's trick-or-treating with friends. He finds Will at home. Eventually, he finds Will after hours at school where he's able to reenter his body in the second most overt sexual assault imagery in the show.

Where El's sexuality was suppressed in season 2, Will's sexuality was being forced upon

Will is feeling the effects of this assault for the rest of the season. He's finding it hard to sleep, and constantly feels the presence of the man who attacked him, everywhere.

Vecna is possessing Will because he wants to use him as a vessel to control help control his army, and for whatever other powers Will may have. If El never closed the gate, if Vecna had completely taken over Will's body as he originally planned, what would he have done from that point on? Would he have just discarded Will's body, or was there something special about him that he needed?

Will begins to believe that everything people say about gay men is true about him

Keep in mind that at this point Will's only experience and exposure to gay sex is being assaulted twice, all while his father and the whole town is bullying him and telling him that gay men are predators. Will isn't a predator. He isn't dangerous and we know this about him. And yet Will uses the freak label in a negative way.

So it's no surprise given the internal and external that Will is suppressing his sexuality even further.

In season 3 El begins her journey of self-discovery and likes what she finds. Will knows exactly who he is

and he hates it.

Will fucking hates himself bro. He knows he gay. And he accepts it. But he also accepts all of the labels and restrictions that it comes with. I am gay. My sexual desires are dangerous. I can never express and experience love and sex the way I want to.

And maybe there is a glimmer inside of him that sees that what he is is a wonderful thing, that maybe he does deserve better than all the abuse he's endured just for being who was.

And maybe these feelings were easier to pack away when he was younger. Maybe it was easier to say "I'm not gonna fall in love" when you're fourteen, but as you get older and grow into your teenage years...

...maybe your desires are getting harder to ignore.

What happens when you don't die innocent, and you grow up instead?

So we bring it around to season 5

El is a superhero and a girlfriend again. But it's not enough. Something is missing and she isn't fulfilled. Max is missing, and El is going to have to face and overcome her biggest challenge yet, which is completing her journey of self-discovery that started in season 3. She's going to have to put aside the expectations that many have for her and decide what she wants.

Will Byers is back in town. How has the climate surrounding gay men changed since then?

Oh! It's worse now!

Remember, the town believes that the same sodomizing Satanists are the ones behind the recent murders and earthquake. It's gonna be really bad for Will when he gets back.

So now Will is tasked with a challenge that is harder here in Hawkins than it might have been in Southern California. Maybe Will can't change the minds of these religious townsfolk but maybe he can somehow find a way to shift his own way of thinking. Embrace who he is, embrace his powers, and realize that he deserves more than the hand he's been dealt.

So that was... a lot

Analysis mostly over. Here are some of my concluding thoughts.

I know that this is probably one of my longest posts ever. I know that a lot of it feels like reiterating plot points, but that really felt like the best way for me to articulate all of my thoughts on this. A lot of it needs to be backed up with evidence from the show.

Also, sometimes when I sit down to make a new analysis, sometimes I don't make it because I think I have all of the answers, but I make it as a way to try and find answers. To talk through some of my long and complicated thoughts and open the floor to discussion. Even with the length of this post, there is waaaaaaaaay more that can be discussed regarding this topic (some that has already been discussed).

To wrap everything up, I wanna share this screenshot from Reddit, which low-key inspired this entire thing. For context, this was in response to a question asking if people expected to see a Will coming-out scene in season 5.

So, hopefully with this long ass post, I've proven that maybe the show is about the complex effects of one's sexuality in the 80's, actually.

[pebblysand]

Hi Jo,

Your recent post about your headcanon about the kids future in castles made me wonder if you had any headcanons on what happens with the adults? How long is Hermione minister, what does Harry do after being head of the DMLE, did Ginny ever publish the novels inspired by Lily, and does Ron ever get rich enough to buy the Chudley Canons?

hi there! thanks for your question!

so, to answer your question generally - i don't really have any headcanons there. i think when it comes to these characters, my brain has said all it had to say about them. i don't really daydream about these people anymore, which is probably saying something. i wouldn't necessarily say they "live happily ever after", because that's not really the vibe of this fic, but i think ultimately, they are fiction, and we have reached the end of the story.

having said that, i can give you my best off-the-cuff sense regarding the specific questions you asked :).

How long is Hermione minister?

i could see her doing another term, so maybe 15 years total? a lot of countries have a two-term limit these days, but you have to remember that time is "longer" when it comes to the ww (people live longer), so i could see her implementing a three/four term limit to make sure people don't stay in office too long. i think hermione would like the idea of forcing democratic change a little. she's less power-hungry/intent on hanging on to power than kingsley.

What does Harry do after being head of the DMLE?

you see the beginning of this in chapter 23 but i think he just... chills. spends time with his children/grandchildren. helps lily get better. i see him helping out hermione, helping her see that last reform through (separating the DMLE and justice) and then quietly retiring. i reckon he does like Hawk eventually and puts together a retirees quidditch team or something haha.

Did Ginny ever publish the novels inspired by Lily?

no. those were just for her. it's too raw, and as she says herself, no one wants to read that. my fellow writers will probably know what i'm talking about, but i think sometimes when you're going through something, all you produce is just you talking to yourself about yourself. it takes time to digest it in a coherent narrative that can connect to others. i think the anxiety and the loss is probably a theme that exists in her future novels, of course, but not in a literal sense. i think Ginny generally doesn't write to talk about herself, so.

Does Ron ever get rich enough to buy the Chudley Canons?

lmao maybe that's what he and harry do after harry retires?? manage the chudley canons?? lmao. harry does it for the lols (and because he loves ron). ginny just rolls her eyes 😒.

[fayeimara]

Meant To Be || One For Every Billion

6. By My Side | Pt 4

"You've got to be kidding me."

Your group has already grabbed a table on the second floor balcony, overlooking the crowded paths below, at one of the nicer restaurants at the heart of the park's main food district and you've been checking updates on your phone after messaging Tobio and Hiro when Oikawa's unamused voice breaks through your thoughts.

You glance up to your left at him to see a look of disbelief on his face and when you follow his line of sight, you see the two stragglers everyone has been waiting on heading your way, weaving through the tables to reach you all.

"Tobio!" A smile breaks across your face at your cousin's grumpy visage. He seems a little closed off, studying the additions to your group with what you think is apprehension.

"Tobio?" Toru's head literally snaps towards you in question.

You turn to him as Tobio and Hiro come to a stop and pull out the two empty chairs at your table.

You hear Iwa murmur a low, "Oh shit." but you have to dismiss it because you're clearly missing something.

"Yeah," you watch Toru with a question in your own eyes, "My cousin, Kageyama Tobio. And Hiro, Hana's brother.."

Iwaizumi is actually facepalming while Maki and Mattsun are chuckling, but you can't see what's so funny so you continue with the introductions, "Tobio, this is-"

"We already know each other, Y/n. I went to school with Oikawa-san and Iwaizumi-san until they graduated this year."

Okay, small world. All you can really say while you digest this information is, "Oh."

But then, "Hiro doesn't know them... right?"

"No, not yet!" Hana's a lifesaver that steps in to make introductions with the rest of the guys while you chew it over. There's clearly history here, right?

Then, you kind of get an answer because Toru turns to speak with you while the others greet each other, "So let me get this straight. Ushiwaka and Tobio-chan are both your cousins?"

"Um. Yeah. Pretty much." You watch his eyes narrow on your response.

"Pretty much?"

"Yeah, Tobio's actually Shin's cousin but they're both more like brothers to me. I guess it's the same situation with Toshi but on my dad's side... we're not directly related either."

You can see the understanding light up his eyes for a moment, "You choose them, huh? As family?"

"Exactly."

"Interesting taste. So family but not."

"No. They're definitely my family, no question. Nothing will ever change that."

You and Toru stare at each other for a moment as you both try to work out what's going on in the other's head and where the lines are. When he doesn't reply back, you raise an eyebrow and prompt, "So.. you and Tobio..?"

He lets out a laugh that might be just a little bitter, "Please, there's no me and Tobio."

"Hm." You let it sit there because you're not one to pry more than that when someone is clearly somewhat unhappy. You'll get it out of Tobio later anyways.

And, cue lightbulb, "You were on the volleyball team together."

A cavalier smile spreads across his face at your question, it's definitely not sweet, teasing, or nice. It seems carefree but the expression in his eyes is almost telling you to back off. However, he still answers, "We were on the same team once, sure."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah." You smile with what you hope is the kindness you want to relay and not the awkward uncertainty you're feeling, "Why? Do you have more you want to say?"

He studies you a moment longer before turning away to pick up his menu and study it instead. You still hear his quiet answer, "No."

You look away as well and your eyes fall over Tobio, who's looking back at you. His expressionless gaze doesn't convey much but, for once, even you can't read beneath it, and then the connection's cut when he glances away to the rides in the distance.

Okay.

The lunch goes surprisingly well considering the amount of tension around the table at the start. Mostly between Toru and Tobio, but even Iwaizumi seems more... engaged in the situation. Everyone else continues to get along fairly well and make up for those three, however, and the atmosphere eases out eventually. It probably helps that Tobio is quiet as per usual and Toru is unerringly good at pretending all is well in Oikawa-land.

When everyone heads out for the rest of the rides, you do catch Toru watching you interact with Tobio and Shin but you don't know what's so curious about your relationship with your cousins. What you do think is curious is his interest and attention when you're joking around with Karu or talking to Hiro. See, he doesn't seem to mind if you sit with your cousins, his friends or Hana, but somehow always manages to slip into the seat next to you if it looks like one of Hana's brothers will.

It's so obvious that you can't help but bring it up as you exit the picture booth at one of the rides, "Not that I should have to ask you permission, but are you going to let me sit with Karu or Hiro?"

"Do you want to sit with one of them?"

"Don't answer my question with a question."

"I like having you by my side."

"Still not an answer to my original question."

"Do you not want me next to you?"

"Stop avoiding my question or I'm going to assume you're jealous."

"Sounds like you want me to be jealous."

"I didn't say that."

"You also didn't deny it, Angel."

"Toru." You mean to admonish him for the little games he's playing but when his first name slips out and you see the wide grin start to spread across his face, you have to close your eyes in defeat.

It's with your eyes closed, as you're taking a breath to find your calm, you hear a soft smile in his voice as he calls to you, "Y/n."

And when you open your eyes he's holding up a printed picture from the ride you were just on. You and Toru are sitting next to each other, your hands interlocked between you again and you're trying to hold your hair down with your free hand, while strands still fly everywhere from the wind, to look over at him. Your expressions are caught in that moment, now eternal, as you're laughing at the cute pose he's trying to make for the picture but he's looking back at you and not the camera, with the happiest grin on his face.

"Why this one out of all the others?"

"I've been getting those too, just electronically. I wanted you to have this one."

"It's for me?"

"So you can remember how much I like you by my side."

You can only smile and take the picture from him, responding with a soft,  "Thank you."

"Say my name again, Angel."

"Oikawa."

"My first name."

"No."

"Please." He's giving you the cutest puppy eyes, but-

"I said no." And you turn to walk away before he can actually convince you, the smile still stretching your lips as you carefully tuck the picture into the hidden pocket, between your phone and cards to keep it from crumpling as much as possible.

-x-x-x-

Your group and Toru's end up going separate ways after an early dinner, which Miwa and her friend joined you all for. She got along famously with the unexpected additions to the group which you found pretty ironic. So did Toru, you guess, since he made it a point to state his delight at meeting a better Kageyama. No comment, you're biased.

You did have to promise Toru that you'd see him again before you left the park which, oopsie, you guess you never mentioned you'd also booked rooms to stay overnight. Haha. Yeah. You wonder if that means you can message him in the morning?

No, he'd just message you tonight if you don't first. He's already texting every so often and it's just been about fifteen minutes since you both went separate ways. So you end up texting him back to promise you'll see him in an hour or so, after some quality time with your cousins.

Back with the original group consisting of just your family, you all head over to one of the themed lounges to grab desserts and drinks. Tobio, of course, sticks with milk, while Miwa is all about getting her drink on with Sakepolitans - a cosmo made with sake.

Ren manages to convince her to order him an old fashioned or two, stating he's almost legal anyways - you roll your eyes at that - but you and Shin decide to experiment with the house recommendations. He goes with the Uji Matcha Latte while you go your typically coffee route with the café mocha.

An hour flies by fast as you all catch up on your day and make plans for the next but, by the end of it, Miwa is definitely in need of a bed, maybe with a trashcan by the side, and Tobio might actually be asleep on the table.

After telling Shin to stick with you and Tobio, Ren hauls Miwa away to get some sleep, letting you both know he'll be meeting back up with his friends after she's tucked in so to call if any of you need him. He does hesitate briefly, glancing between you and Shin, and you swear he mutters, "Just how much trouble can they get into here?" before shaking his head and leaving.

Hm. You throw a look over to Shin as he shakes Tobio awake and state, "Why don't you get him back to his room while I finish my coffee?"

He eyes you warily, considering your offer, "Right. Like you'll go to your room straight after?"

"What? Don't tell me you're not meeting up with Karu after you drop Tobio to bed."

His mouth opens but literally no words come out. Yeah, that's what you thought.

"What about you? Meeting up with your boyfriend?" Never mind, he found his words. Well, you can too.

"Why do sound like a elementary school kid? Oh right, emotionally you are one."

"I'm telling Ren that you're sneaking out." Rat. He would never, would he?

"You're literally just proving my point. Please, keep going."

"Why are you like this?" Ah, there's the crack. But you need to push a little more.

You lean back with a mocking smile, "Better than you at everything?"

Yup, now he's pouting. "Mean."

"It's genetic. You should know, you are too."

"Wow, I can't believe we're related."

"Me neither. Now, should I let you do your thing and have fun with your friend? Or do we call Ren and both end up stuck in our rooms for the night."

"How do you always...? Never mind." He grimaces in complete defeat, "Fine. Just keep your phone on and answer me right back if I message or call."

He's about to turn away but stops and adds, "And obviously old rules apply. You call immediately if you run into Ren so I can have my story together or make sure I'm back."

"Obviously." You smirk up at him over the mug before taking a sip.

But he didn't even have to say it. Whatever shit the two of you pull on each other, you also have each others backs when it counts. Especially with your older siblings. That was the pact those of you within a one to two year age range made with each other when you were all kids, as if any of you even had to. It's kind of cute you guess, but you'd never say that to any of them or they'd never stop harassing you.

As he heads off, you pull out your phone to message Toru and then decide to drop a picture of your drink on your twitter while you wait for his response. Which is unnecessary because the boy responds almost immediately. What, was he waiting by his phone?

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Masterlist

Behind The Scenes!

-Y/n also stopped to get pics... at all the rides

-Toru might have been telling the truth and got them all lol and he was def caught looking at her in more than just that one ;)

-Not that she wasn't... I don't know about you, but I definitely think I know which ones they'll both get printed :)

A/N: Really getting there.. one more part left in this episode! Buckle up, it's the longest one <3

Taglist: @delusivist, @prettyinblack231, @kac-chowsballs, @sakusasimpbot, @hawkthekinnie

[thebranchyoubreak]

This shit crazy

Y'all don't know that don't shit faze me

(Ball so hard) This shit weird

We ain't even 'posed to be here

(Ball so hard) Since we here

It's only right that we'd be fair

Psycho: I'm liable to go Michael, take your pick

B-ball so hard) I'm shocked too

I'm supposed to be locked up too

If you escaped what I've escaped

You'd be in Paris getting fucked up too

(B-ball so hard) What she order, fish fillet?

I don't even know what that means

No one knows what it means, but it's provocative

No, it's not, it's gross

Gets the people going"

Ball so hard mothafuckers wanna fine me

Don't let me get in my zone

These other niggas is lyin'

Actin' like the summer ain't mine

(I got that hot bitch in my home)

The stars is in the building

They hands is to the ceiling

I know I'm 'bout to kill it

How you know? I got that feeling

You're the only story that never been told

You're my dirty little secret, wanna keep you so

Come on out, come on over, help me forget

Keep the walls from falling as they're tumbling in

You made everybody else seem insane

You filled my head with your notions

As far as my eyes can see

There are shadows surrounding me

You've always shared my darkest hours

Chasing the only Meaningful memory you thought you had left

With some pretty, bright and bubbly Terrible scene that was doing her thing on your chest

But, oh comely

It isn't as pretty as you'd like to guess

Standing next to me, he's only my enemy (blond and I were shoulder to shoulder waiting to be seated at the resto on jakk’s bday)

Your father made fetuses with flesh licking ladies While you and your mother were asleep in the trailer park (my father fucking anything that moved & giving me siblings)

The music and medicine you needed for comforting

So make all your fat fleshy fingers to moving

And pluck all your silly strings and bend all your notes for me

And soft silly music is meaningful magical

Smelling of semen all under the garden

Was all you were needing when you still believed in me(the night blond told Jakk to break it off with me, he went home to tell her that we weren’t breaking up, but when he got there her mother was sleeping over, so we met in the park and had sex. It wasn’t very good, sadly. Kind of just an attempt to feel bonded in the face of adversity.)

They buried her body

I wished I could save her in some sort of time machine

Know all your enemies

We know who our enemies are ( I just got this. It’s a reference to stella’s death. Several spiritualists said the accidents (mine & hers) were connected, and that she absorbed a hit that night that was meant for me, and that it resulted in the accident.)

Goldaline, my dear

We will fold and freeze together

Far away from here

Goldaline’ is an unreleased Neutral Milk Hotel song that has been described by Jeff Mangum as a story about lost siamese sisters that are soon to be engulfed by a beast.

But now we move to feel

For ourselves inside some stranger's stomach

They are warm inside the belly of the beast, and together they await their death by digestion.

Further details are: Goldaline is a siamese twin, lost in the woods indeed, and they are facing a bear. Mangum here speaks of the theme of death (in the eyes of these girls) as redemption. Earlier lines mostly speak of how they are lost and will die a horrid death, but there is a solution after, “far away from here […] sun and spring and green forever” which could be heaven or whatever. Here, in the bear, by destruction, they can find redemption…There is also a recurring theme of reincarnation on this album: perhaps after being devoured they find themselves, not in the stomach of a monster, but of their next-life’s mother.

(Worth mentioning that when stella was alive, I agreed to write her a play, and she wanted it to be about a little girl and a bear.)

Knowing everything, knowing everything, we cried

I told you everything about everything

You said "Holy shit, we almost died"

I had no idea, I had no idea

[ganymedesclock]

Clockie, I'm still kind of down from Coran's show making Hunk look dumb. Do you have any Hunk positive head cannons or theories rattling about in that astounding mind of yours?

So something I’ve been kicking around for a while is a comment made by part of the show’s crew that while it’s fun, from a writing perspective, to show off how smart Hunk is, it’s not something he himself focuses on because it’s “not his passion”, and I think how I read that is...

Pidge clearly has a lot of identity bound up in being smart. She’s socially awkward and this is the element of herself she’s most confident putting forwards- we see this in s1e1 where the first time she seems really actually happy is smugly declaring she built all her equipment, and in s4e2 in the first flashback, she’s clearly trying to make friends/connect with people by offering up information.

Hunk is not, remotely, even in the slightest, stupid, any more than Lance is a seductive homme fatale, any more than Pidge rattles meaningless jargon, any more than Shiro is a brainless beauty whose only appeal is his Heroic Musculature. Any more than Allura is Keith, or Keith himself is an arrogant lone wolf. These concepts are bundled together under the unifying umbrella of they’re completely wrong about who these people are.

Because Lance flirts but in his vlog acknowledges he’s not actually ready for a serious relationship, because when people reciprocate he rapidly turns into a timid dork about it whose idea of impressing a girl is “....do you wanna see me climb this tree”, who in s2e2 the idea of someone kissing him on the cheek because they were grateful to him was a big deal. Because Pidge is very inclined to heavy vocabulary but it is anything but meaningless.

Because Hunk’s hilarious- but as a brilliant, sociable person who’s immediately likable. He’s totally okay with the “humorous” thing because Hunk is funny, we’ve seen him! Guy has a killer appreciation for puns. But of course, Worm Coran is marketing this in the most shallow superficial way possible and he’s not letting any of them shine the way they’re actually good at.

I think the key difference between Hunk and Pidge is they’re intellectual equals, but Pidge takes her intelligence very personally. It’s kinda the only game she has, she’s still awkwardly growing into a lot of other things and as a prodigious fifteen-year-old who struggles to connect outside her family, it’s sort of the bastion she hides behind.

Hunk? Hunk is two years older than Pidge, and even the way he talks about his area of expertise betrays that he has a much more grounded (one might even say earthy) understanding. He doesn’t just understand the subject matter brilliantly, but he summarizes, uses metaphors, explains things in a very easily digestible manner. Which requires excellent command of the subject matter- because he knows how to truncate and summarize. Matt in s4e3 points out that Hunk’s making all of these impressive cognitive leaps behind the scenes to which he very knowingly and smugly replies “Yeah, well, I try.”

The underlying thread to Hunk’s interests seems to be that he’s fond of things that are approachable, but have near infinite potential to be built on. It’s very easy to pick up cooking and baking, or simple machinery- but from there, the sky is the limit to how sophisticated and advanced you can get. It very much ties Hunk back to his element and his whole theme of foundations. Hunk with a good foundation is unstoppable- a determined juggernaut that even Shiro hesitates at (see, s1e6 and the “I knew it” rant) worthy of his Lion. This is the guy that slammed his vehicle headfirst into Zarkon’s flagship and popped out of it blasting the hell out of everybody in his way.

Without it, he struggles- we see this very literally with his motion sickness, which almost entirely fades the longer the show goes on- as he gains more confidence. So it makes sense that Hunk loves things that he can cultivate over time, deepening and enriching his understanding.

In mythology, the aspect of earth has often been associated with wealth and plenty, and Hunk’s close connections to Pidge (forest) and Lance (water) would also create an image of agriculture- which Hunk also shows that his understanding of food goes all the way down to the fundamentals of where it comes from considering in order to make milkshakes out of actual fresh cow milk he’d need to know how to pasteurize it. I wouldn’t be surprised at all if Hunk rounds this out with knowledge of the photosynthetic process, digestion and nutrition, and probably also understands machinery down to the nature of how certain minerals and materials are formed and where in the earth they’re found. 

So Hunk presents a complacent surface- he takes his brain for granted and doesn’t have the slightly needy emotional tie to it that Pidge does- but the breadth and depth of his knowledge would betray that Hunk actually is a highly curious person- and we see this somewhere else.

See, Hunk very specifically disregards boundaries when he’s emotionally invested in something. All the way back in s1e3, the first sign we have of Hunk connecting emotionally with the team?

Bear hugs for everybody.

Even earlier than that, him taking proper interest in Pidge?

Look at this face. This is not the visage of a man who is clueless about boundaries and just bumbling into people by mistake. He knows exactly what he did.

Hunk gets interested in things and people and his response is to wade up to his armpits in it. And that, I think, is the thing that gets him following Lance into situations even when he’s talking about it being a bad idea- because actually his sense of adventure is, ultimately, stronger than his fear of the unknown. Part of him not only wants to poke in and figure it out, but, he doesn’t want someone to just hand him that understanding- he wants the satisfaction of dismantling this himself.

Half of his “I knew it” rant in s1e5 wasn’t even directed at Rolo, really- again, it’s the, “I had the satisfaction of figuring this out.”

Personally, this makes me think that Hunk and Pidge probably learned what they know from very different sources- while Pidge seems to have hit the books very hard and spent a lot of time around her very highly educated family and the high-education Garrison, I would guess that Hunk’s access to higher education probably came after a massive volume of his knowledge- that Hunk is overwhelmingly self-taught. He strikes me as the kid who dismantled the TV remote, and then the TV, and then got frustrated because he figured out the TV could run better if you did this instead, and after a while the level of his fiddling hit such a threshold that he inevitably had to go play with the Garrison’s space program because he was having a hard time finding a challenge any more. And sure, it’s quite possible he had some academic training pre-Garrison but it would be overwhelmingly supplemented with going home and trying it himself, Mythbusters style. He strikes me as an incredibly hands-on kinetic learner.

But to Hunk, it’s not a big deal- again, it’s not really a part of his identity to prove his smarts as much as it’ll just bug him if he leaves this thing without digging out its secrets. He isn’t invested in proving his intellectual supremacy as much as he is invested in connecting with people and the world and exploring them- continuing to endlessly feed his curiosity and, to a degree, his desire to take care of others.

[anettrolikova]

Mastery and Mimicry by Sep Kamvar

You have everything you need right here, he told me. Look at it. Good surf, good friends, this sunset. The problem with having a lot of stuff, he said, is that at some point the stuff starts ruling you.

A recurring theme in science fiction is the idea that one day, our technologies will become self-aware, grow their population, and take over the world. Of course, humans will still be around, otherwise there’s no story, but they will be second-class citizens to the tools that they invented.

I've often wondered why self-awareness always comes first. Perhaps it's because it makes for a more interesting storyline. After all, a technology doesn't need to be self-aware to be self-reinforcing.

There is a story of Bill Joy asking Danny Hillis what he thought about the scenario in which humans one day merge with robots. Danny responded that the changes would come gradually, and we'd get used to it.

That's the way it is with technology. We get used to it.

When the mechanical clock was invented, one of its early uses was to set the arrival and departure times of factory workers during the industrial revolution. At the time, people hated the idea of getting to work at a certain time; it felt like the ultimate victory of machine over man. Now, it's seen as responsible behavior.

But if aliens come from outer space and see people wake up grudgingly every morning to the beeping of an alarm clock, they might wonder who is the master and who is the tool.

Inside of each of us, there are about 10 trillion human cells, and about 100 trillion bacterial cells. By cell count, we are only 10% human.

Given how outnumbered we are, it's surprising that we don't die more often from bacterial disease. You might expect that, of the hundreds of species of bacteria that live inside of us, at least a few would have the habit of getting out of line and growing at our expense.

We can give credit to antibiotics for saving us, but I think that would miss the point. Even before antibiotics, a surprisingly small number of people died from bacteria considering how many of them we host. And if we could invent an antibiotic that would get rid of all bacteria, we wouldn't want to. Our bacteria help us digest our food, store our fats, produce our vitamins, and train our immune systems.

The truth is that we are not alive in spite of the hordes of bacteria that inhabit us. We are alive because of them.

Relationships tend to develop a rich texture as they mature, and us and our symbiotic bacteria have been going at this for some time now. I'm reminded of an older couple, where both partners have their quirks, but each knows how far to go, when to pull back, and what to tolerate; where each knows the other so well, and is so dependent on the other, that it's hard to tell where one person stops and where the other begins.

The relationship between us and our tools is newer, like a younger love. It's fiery and exciting, and we're still trying to figure out our boundaries.

Our tools, like most things, have natural limits to their utility. Up to a certain point, e-mail makes us more efficient. After that, the mounds of e-mail in our inbox take time away from our real work. Up to a certain point, time spent on social networks brings us closer to our friends. After that, it takes away from time we spend with them in person.

Our bacteria can offer us some wisdom here. If we want tools that respect their natural limits, we can design limitation into the tools themselves.

If the idea of self-limiting tools seems antithetical to technology and capitalism, let me suggest that we already build them. A search engine is a self-limiting tool. As is an online dating site. When these tools succeed, people leave the site. Video games and TVs, on the other hand, are self-reinforcing. Their use doesn't lead to disuse; their use leads to more use.

The more self-reinforcing a tool is, the more likely we are to use it at our own expense. On the other hand, the more self-limiting a tool is, the more likely it is to die out.

The key is to find the balance.

Gandhi fiercely opposed expensive technology. And at the time, modern technology was expensive technology. If you opposed the factory, you opposed modernity.

But what Gandhi understood is that tools are most useful to the people that own them.

And villagers didn’t own factories.

We use tools to build our tools. We use an ax, a hammer, and a saw to make a cabin, and we use Python, Django, and Apache to build a web service. These upstream tools are crucial in shaping our society. A world with no hammers would have no houses.

The web, for the most part, gets this right. Most web services are built on top of free operating systems, databases, web servers, and programming languages. They are marketed by accessible tools like Facebook and Twitter and Adwords. And they are often funded by accessible funding sources like YCombinator, or Kickstarter, or by sales through App Stores. The pace of innovation on the web, and the outsized role that software has played in shaping our lives, is in large part because these upstream mechanisms for production, distribution, and financing are more available than they are in other industries.

Look for upstream tools that are accessible, and make them more powerful. The recent efforts around JavaScript, like Crankshaft and processing.js, are nice examples here.

Like the sun, our upstream tools should be accessible and empowering to all

When we build our tools, we should aim for the latter.

An individual ant is a feckless creature. It wanders around aimlessly, seeming to have no ability or purpose. But when you get a lot of them together, it's like alchemy. They transform into creatures that astound us with their intellect.

If software follows content, I imagine we'll start to see lots of APIs that do small things. But they will easily interact with one another to together do big things. And if hardware then follows software, I imagine that we will see lots of small devices that do simple things alone, but complex things together. They might remind us of ants.

When we build our tools, we often depend on metrics to guide our development. We keep graphs of unique visitors and pageviews and watch them closely. This keeps us honest. It's hard to convince anybody that we're building a useful tool if our metrics show that nobody is using it.

But we must take care when we use metrics. Metrics can be like the horse in the old Zen story. Once we decide on them, they have a habit of setting the agenda. As the old adage goes, what gets measured gets managed.

It is useful, therefore, to have missions to balance our metrics. Of course, each tool should have its own mission. But if I were to suggest one mission for all tools, it might be this:

Every tool should nourish the things upon which it depends.

We see this principle at varying levels in some of our tools today. I call them cyclical tools. The iPhone empowers the developer ecosystem that helps drive its adoption. A bike strengthens the person who pedals it. Open-source software educates its potential contributors. A hallmark of cyclical tools is that they create open loops: the bike strengthens its rider to do things other than just pedal the bike.

Cyclical tools are like trees, whose falling leaves fertilize the soil in which they grow.

It’s difficult to build cyclical tools because the alternative is so tempting. Cars are faster than bikes.

But you can’t measure the impact of tools on their own. You must measure them by the ecosystems that they co-create.

Our heads cultivate reason. Our hearts cultivate intuition.

Our heads seek opportunity. Our hearts seek purpose.

Our heads maximize utility. Our hearts give gifts.

Our heads think of self. Our hearts feel connection.

Today, our technologies reflect reason and utility and opportunity and self. But this may be an artifact of our time. We could equally imagine building technologies that reflect intuition and purpose and gift and connection. I might say we're already starting.

When people talk of gift economies, often they talk about them as a replacement for the market economy. But gift economies and market economies have operated side-by-side for much of history. Child care, until recently, was exclusively a gift economy — neighbors would babysit one another’s kids. The creative arts and science have historically been gift economies, and to a large extent they still are. And today, free, open-source software sits alongside ad-supported and paid software.