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incorrecthoroscopes · 2 years

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My thoughts on the twelve kinds of Taurus Suns 🐄☀️

Taurus Sun/Aries Moon 🧃- difficult combination, taurus sun needs routine and familiarity which the explosive emotions that come with aries moon might upset, can lead repressing the emotional side which is seen as inconvenient or burdensome. on the other hand, when well-integrated, the moon may help the Taurus Sun break through its inertia and the Sun calms the Moon down

Taurus Sun/Taurus Moon 🐢 - like with all double signs there’s not that much to say, it’s just the archetype of Taurus times two. Chill, stable, a bit sentimental, always seeking beauty and comfort.

Taurus Sun/Gemini Moon 🥝 - the sun might stifle the moons natural curiosity, on the other hand the moon might grow restless with the slow pace of life the sun is setting, leading to anxiety. they just want to sit down with their book and a cup of tea but at the same time they want to read every single book and try all the different drinks and they don’t have the time to chill, yet all they want is to chill— you get the idea

Taurus Sun/Cancer Moon 🥑 - these two work great together, both signs heavily associated with the home, this person definitely has the prettiest house you’ve ever been to, and they just make you feel so warm and welcome and cared for. on the other hand, they may be a bit too sentimental, living in the past rather than the present

Taurus Sun/Leo Moon 🦚 - can lead to entitlement, also, the person might feel like their emotions are too big for them to handle. like, they just want to chill but at the same time they can’t help but find themselves in the middle of the drama and what the hell? they may feel like they have two drastically different personalities. on the flip side, they do have exquisite taste.

Taurus Sun/Virgo Moon 🥒 - double earth, harmonious. there’s like a 95% chance they do some kind of knitting/crocheting/etc. Taurus Sun eases some of the anxiety that comes with Virgo Moon, and the moon helps the Sun actually Get Up and Do Shit

Taurus Sun/Libra Moon 🌴 - double venus, always seeking beauty and harmony and security, one of the most aesthetic people you’ll ever meet. their venus placement would probably reveal more.

Taurus Sun/Scorpio Moon 🪲 - I feel like this such a difficult combination (well, it’s an opposition, of course it is), so if this is you I’m so sorry. This person just wants to relax and enjoy the beauty of the world but there’s this subconscious part that won’t let them, that always seeks to dig beyond the surface and beyond this illusion of prettiness and that is never satisfied until it sees the Truth about things, no matter how uncomfortable. And so they’ll go and buy more fancy things and surround themselves with more superficial beauty just to Shut Up those unwanted thoughts, but it never works, not until they accept that the world is not beautiful, not yet, but they can help make it so.

Taurus Sun/Sagittarius Moon 🍀 - extremely different energies, kind of similar to both Taurus/Aries and Taurus/Gem. Very restless, just wants to Calm Down for once but their emotions are on fire, wants to stay at home in their little safe space but has this inexplicable need to go out and explore and experience the world. Would do well with a cup of chamomile tea.

Taurus Sun/Capricorn Moon 🍏 - like all Cap Moons very repressed. Probably buys all the fancy clothes and eats macaroons every day and hopes that if they surround themselves with enough prettiness the sad feelings will just magically go away. (spoiler alert: they will not. you actually have to let yourself feel them.)

Taurus Sun/Aquarius Moon 🧩 - kind of similar to Taurus/Scorpio in the sense that they crave comfort and pleasure but can’t seem to fully experience it, Taurus Sun is all about experiencing the world through physical sensations, being grounded, yet the Aqua Moon is probably dissociating and in another world entirely, forgetting in even has a body, while the Sun is screaming “come back to earth!! let me simply enjoy life!!”

Taurus Sun/Pisces Moon 🍃 - at their best they can be some of the kindest people, they are very sensitive to the pain of others and driven to make the world safer and more beautiful in hopes of easing it. (at least, they can write you a poem about it. creating an actual action plan might take a while). at their worst, they are the masters of escapism, they will surround themselves with pretty things and dream up pretty scenarios in their heads and forget (or choose not notice) that there’s anything ugly about the world at all.

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gallusrostromegalus · 3 years

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If you ever want to do a "Top 10 home gardening tomato cultivars" segment, I'm here for it. (My folks mostly plant Early Girls, but they have a ridiculously short growing season up there. I grow Sweet 100s, because they taste good enough and I gave up on growing anything other than cherries due to bastard squirrels who like to take exactly one bite out of larger tomatoes.)

IT IS NOW TIME TO INFO DUMP

CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED

Ok so the actual thing with tomatoes is there are- checks google- about 10,000 tomato cultivars out there and every single one of them is different, so you should tailor your tomato breeds to what you actually want to do with them. 10K is a lot a breeds to break down, but fortunately, there are ways to Do That:

1. Determinate vs. Indeterminate

Determinate tomatoes grow to a genetically predetermined size and start fruiting. Pros: Tends to have a short time between planting and fruiting, don’t get bigger than a certain size if you only have so much space. Cons: Once they’re done fruiting, that’s it. you really only get the one crop out of them. Also tend to have sad, watered-down flavor.

Indeterminate tomatoes grow as big as the space will let them, and start fruting when they get around to it. Pros: Maximum Plant for minimum investment, which can be like 10x as big as a determinate plant. Will KEEP fruiting until it gets too cold, so if you can get it in a pot you can move inside you could potentially still be harvesting tomatoes after thanksgiving like my MIL was this year. If you live somewhere warm like SoCal or AZ, you could keep it alive all year. Cons: MUCH longer time between planting and fruiting. Indeterminate tomates Get there when they get there. Also may be more prone to disease and pests than the more-modified determinate plants.

There are determinate and indeterminate tomatoes in all 5 of the Greater Tomato Archetypes. Speaking of:

2. The 5 Tomato Archetypes

I’m so good at segues!

So tomatoes come in 5 basic types, each which is generally better for something culinary than the others. You CAN substitute different types of tomato but your food generally doesn’t come out as good.

1. Cherry: Cherry tomatoes produce fruits that are about the size of cherries. Some people put Grape and Saladette tomatoes in here but they are WRONG, both of those belong in the “Round/All-Purpose” group because Cherry tomatoes specifically have thinner skins, more soluable pectin, and more dissolved glutemates, which means they cook VERY differently. Cherry tomatoes also produce a shitload of fruits at a time and might be some of the heaviest producers. Tend to be more heat-tolerant. Good For: Fresh tomato sauces (i.e. takes less than 20 minutes to make), salads, snacking on directly off the vine like you are a small tarsier discovering a hidden bounty of fruit.

Top reccomendations are: -Indigo Cherry or Dwarf Black Krim if you can find it. I always reccomend dark-pigmented tomatoes as I find they have better flavor, pest resistence and UV tolerance. Taste fruity but not over-sweet and Very Tomato-y. -Sweet 100/Super-Sweet 100/Sweet Millions: All varietals of the same mass-producing Cherry Tomato. Makes absolute buckets of Tomatoes, sweeter and more fruity than the Indigo cherry, good disease resistence and long growing season.

2. Paste: Paste tomatoes are thin-skinned, meaty and soft tomatoes that... well, they make good tomato paste, the basis for all long-cooking tomato sauces and recipies. They tend to be kind of Oblong and sometimes grow in fun extras like lil tomato “dicks” or weird cthulian shapes, but this doesn’t effect the flavor or nutrition There’s a shitload of great varietals in this category, I’ve yet to hear of a Bad Paste Tomato, just Less Excellent ones. Good For: Long-cooking Tomato-based dishes like: Bolognese, chili, ketchup, BBQ etc. Also can and freeze well.

Top Reccomendations are: -Amish Paste: MEATY, and well-suited for growing in a variety of conditions. Paste is smooth and velvety. Good for Chili, BBQ and Bolognese. -Opalka tomato: Russian Tomato, little more on the acidic side, grows well in places prone to surprise late frosts. Paste isn’t as smooth but very thick. makes great ketchup. -San Marzano: THE tomato for making Marinara Sauce (also does good bolognese). Sweeter and lighter, with a slightly runnier paste that clings well to pasta. cans and freezes excellently, does well in places with HOT summers.

3. Beef: Beef tomatoes are BIG motherfuckers that kind of take a long time to grow but are very rewarding. Beef tomatoes are firm, have a very solid meat and are best eaten raw, typically sliced onto a sandwich or seared under a broiler for a NZ Mousetrap. Not only are the fruits big but so are the Plants, so they take a long time to reach maturity and the fruit takes FOREVER to ripen but if you like a sandwich, they can’t be beat. Also they look hella impressive on instagram. They also tend to be more prone to Blossom End Rot (which is just a calcium deficiency- just make sure to fertilize with some eggshells and don’t over-water them), and despite the size, don’t tolerate cold well. Good for: Slicing on sandwiches, eating raw like you’re biting into the still-beating heart of your nemesis and enjoying that sweet, sweet revenge, searing quickly under a broiler or putting on a Kabob.

Top Reccomendations Are: -Brandywine: Hefty, great fresh tomato flavor, and PINK. -Big Zac: Goddamn Massive Tomato. A Real Heckin’ Chonker. meatier flavor and lots of firm flesh with few seeds. -Beefmaster: One problem with Beef tomatoes is that a lot of them are heirloom varietals that aren’t as widely available. Of the ones that are easy to get your hands on, Beefmaster is the best, but it lacks the flavor punch of Brandywine or Big Zac, but it’s not a BAD tomato.

4. Round/Early/All-Purpose: The Workhorse of Tomatoes, the Round Tomato does it all- sauces, salsa, sandwiches, salads, and snacks. But it doesn’t do them quite as well as the other, more specialized tomatoes. Also, some of these tomatoes have been Over-Worked and bred to fruit early and transport well, at the expense of it’s Flavor. I’M TALKING ABOUT YOU, EARLY GIRL AND BETTER BOY, YOU FLAVORLESS TENNIS BALLS, YOU INSULTS TO THE MIGHTY HOUSE OF NIGHTSHADES. Love yourself, don’t get Early Girl or Better Boy. If your season is too short for anything but the earliest of tomatoes, it may be better to grow Something Else than put all that effort in for Disappointment. That said, there are many types of Round/All-Purpose tomatoes that haven’t been overbred into corporate blandness, and I can reccomend them in good concisence if you’re not totally sure what you want to do with your tomatoes: Good For: Indecisive people, people just learning how to grow plants, using one plant for a variety of purposes, people who are not yet prepared to enter the world of Tomato Opinions. Top reccomendations are: -If you really must have an early-fruiting tomato, the Wayahead is an heirloom that people swear comes in early with good size, flavor and firm structure. I have not personally tied this varietal but people I trust like it. -Black Krim: GOD-TIER TOMATO. It’s got it all- flavor, high yields, firm structure, pest and disease resistence, fucking purple stripes. Cans Well, Freezes well, seeds well and breeds true. Fuck yes. Other tomatoes fucking WISH they had what this Hot Bitch has. -Invincible is a damn-hard-to-kill tomato that isn’t very large but fruits reliably and preforms well all around. it also ripens 3 fruits at a time so you’re not constantly overburdened with Tomato. Probably my top pick for beginners that need an Emotional Support Crop.

5. Fun: This is not, strictly speaking, a traditional type of tomato, but I feel like it’s an important category for people who want to do something different or really enjoy all Tomatoes have to offer. Good For: Trying new things, taunting the garden gods with my hubris, showing off at the garden FB group, discovering new flavors of plant.

Top Reccomendations: -Mr. Stripey: it has a goofy name, it’s yellow-and-pink striped, and it smells and tastes almost exactly like pineapple, but it doesn’t try to digest you back. I love it. -Japanese Truffle: Dark Brown tomato that looks like someone tried to make ferro rochers at home and bungled it, and has a LONG maturation time, BUT it’s got a chocolately flavor and even at maturity has green insides which give it this. Lightness? it’s hard to describe but it’s a fascinating flavor. The plant also is more branched and elegant than most tomatoes. Very different, very cool. -I have not personally tried Cherokee Purple but I have heard good things about it. We’ll see how it does in the garden this year. -Tomatillos and Ground Cherries: Not actually tomatoes, but closely related. Neat herbaceous sort of flavor, like thyme but to the left. Also comes in a fun Organic wrapping paper. -Ketchup ‘n’ Fries: a Sweet 100 tomato top grafted onto Kennebec Potato rootstock, so it grows both tomato AND potato! Grafting was invented prbably about a week after the concept of agriculture was, and consists of taking two or more closely related plants and taping a cutting of oone into a hole in the other until the plants heal together. Like that one gorilla-dude from Umbrella academy, but without the angst. You can get them pre-made or attempt to make them at home if you’re feeling adventurous and are OK with potentially killing a bunch of starts while you learn.

Good Luck and Happy Gardening!

#Long post #tomatoes #the garden of earthly HOA violations #njelruch

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tg-headcanons · 3 years

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Touka Was Done So Dirty So I Must Analyze It

I have a lot to say about how poorly Tokyo Ghoul turned out. There was so much wasted potential, so much meaningless angst, so many straight relationships crammed where they didn’t need to be, and so many sudden, anticlimactic plot points. But of all of the mishandling and poor choices, I think that Touka’s treatment is the worst.

Touka was a complex and interesting character. She was raised by loving parents, one of whom died early, the other lived a little longer while doing everything he could to impart lessons to keep her and her brother alive. When he died she was suddenly forced to become her brother’s guardian and rush out into a world that is so much less forgiving than her father was. They got taken in by her uncle and his friends, housed and fed, and she even got the opportunity to pursue an education which is a monumental luxury to ghouls. Despite resenting humans for the way her family was massacred and she is forced to live, she became close to a human, looking past her trauma for a friendship she cherishes. Her brother reacted badly to the idea of her being around such a dangerous person who could have them killed like their parents were, and ran off to join Aogiri, leaving her and her uncle as the last remnants of their family.

Touka is angry, and id say rightfully so. Her parents murder, being forced to grow up far too fast, being forced to live in this war she was drafted into at birth, any one thing would be enough to fuck someone up. She has all that going on, so understandable, she’s going to be pissed at the world. If it ended there it would be perfect, a great starting point for a character to delve deep into the concepts of society shaping identity, but then the worst happened

Touka is an archetype I like to call ”Angry Teen Girl”

Before we talk about the archetype, let’s talk about teen girls in real life, specifically how they’re treated by society. The teen girl in the public eye is simultaneously the epitome of beauty who is seductive and manipulative and lustful, as well as airheaded and shallow and naive and pure. The way that changes has to do with the convenience of the adult male onlooker. She’s A tactical mastermind when she doesn’t want to fuck you and she’s an airhead when she has opinions. She’s a prude when she doesn’t respond to advances and a whore when she wears a t-shirt. Most importantly, she’s a silly stupid baby when she demands independence and respect, and a grown woman who should know better when she acts her age

Teen girls don’t have the same understanding that boys their age do. When a teen boy messes up its “oh he’s 15 he’s still learning.” When a teen girl messes up its “shes 15 shes practically an adult she should know better by now.” Because adult men have decided the teen girl is desirable, she’s forced to grow up faster to save them the shame of acknowledging that she is a literal child. And after being treated like stupid children and sexy mature adults, teen girls are rightfully angry. This is so universal, so all encompassing, that almost every teen girl has this undercurrent of anger and grief at how they’d been socialized. Because of that, it too is brushed off as “stupid teen girls and their silly little feelings.”

This is where the Angry Teen Girl trope comes in. There is so much history behind women’s treatment, so many valid reasons for a teenage girl to be pissed, but this character is almost always played off as a joke. Either a joke or something to fix.

Back to Touka, let’s run through this again, this time through her eyes. Her family was perfect until it was taken violently away, she had to become violent against her dead fathers wishes to protect her little brother, that little brother who she was forced to sacrifice her bloodless life for left her for having a single friend, she lived her whole life knowing that no matter who she is or what she does the world hates her and she’s going to be murdered by the state. She has to deal with all of this, and then she meets Kaneki, who tells her to her face that he’s better than her because he was human, not realizing that not eating people is a privilege from birth that she never had. Touka is angry, and Touka is a child. A traumatized child who isn’t in the right for her violent reaction, but isn’t an adult with a peaceful world who knows better

Now if people just hated her for that then fine, but there is a huge overlap of the people who hate Touka for her aggressive personality, and people who love ayato. For every “she’s a bitch who’s so mean and super violent and shouldn’t be killing investigators when she doesn’t need to and deserves getting hurt” there’s a “he’s a sweet boy who’s trying his best and he killed all those people because he’s traumatized.” More and more, it’s clear that the same sympathy given to ayato, the much more violent and aggressive sibling, is not given to his sister. Right off the bat, she’s easy for many to dismiss because the misogynistic tropes that made her are fully reinforced

She is established as a complex person who simultaneously resents humanity for how ghouls are treated and doesn’t want them dead. She’s aggressive to her loved ones as a way to protect them and kills investigators so they don’t have the chance to threaten them. She’s angry because of how she spent her whole life just barely avoiding death at the hands of a genocidal government, she’s angry that she has to live this way, she’s even angry that she had to become violent at all and couldn’t live the peaceful life she could have had

But because she is an Angry Teen Girl, nothing matters except “But She’s such a bitch”

Now Touka at this point is still a great character, but things go south fast. The focus shifts from the world and complex relationships to Kaneki. Out of nowhere, Touka is pining after him. Out of nowhere, she has feelings for him. It was more convenient to just Insert Romance instead of developing them. Even if it stopped here Touka would still be a great character, but it didn’t.

After she fled anteiku, her character died. Not only was she completely cast aside during Ken’s Plot Convenience And Honestly Lazy Amnesia arc, but everything behind her character was stripped to its bare bones

You see, the Angry Teen Girl is only a teen for so long, and she can become one of two things: Hysterical sad evil woman or Calm Momwife. It’s a problem a lot of male authors have of only seeing a woman’s anger as a character flaw. In order to keep her as a hero, her anger needs to be “fixed,” and even that isn’t done well.

Suddenly, her drive is gone. Her love of Yoriko is completely abandoned, as is her reason to care for average humans. Her ambitions of collage and success are cast aside. Her complicated feeling towards her brother become “oh I get it it’s all cool I love him and just want him safe no hard feelings haha.” By the time we see her in Re:, she is no longer Touka. She is just the Momwife personality she got crammed into because Ishida just couldn’t think of a use for this previously complex character than “Wife And Mom.”

I’m not saying that she should have stayed angry and aggressive, but she should have stayed consistent, she should have changed over time and for coherent reasons. Such pivotal parts of her character are unceremoniously thrown out, we don’t even get a good explanation for why she turned out that way. Yes, she could rebuild her family with her brother, but it should have been built up to. Yes, she could leave Yoriko behind, but it should have any reason for it at all. Hell, I’m a die hard Hidekane fan, but I’d say she could have had a great romance with Kaneki if it didn’t come out of nowhere

She was “calmed” by having her dreams stripped from her after losing anteiku. She was given her “happy ending” by getting knocked up from desperate and uncomfortable pity sex. She was a girl who wanted to go to collage and protect her loved ones, she had queer undertones of being in love with her human fried, she had reasonable aggression as a self defense mechanism. Any one of these things could spring into an arc of their own.

But all that was thrown out in favor of being the most convenient straight love interest for Kaneki, though her personality was so incompatible with him that it had to be stripped bare to even pretend it works

If she had been given the same treatment as her brother and had her anger treated as a byproduct of the way she’s forced to survive rather than a self caused character flaw, she could have been perfect. If she’d been kept in the focus and not shoved aside for so much of Re:, she would have been good. If any part of her character at all stayed in tact, she would have been fine. But instead she’s reduced to either a Bitchy Child or Momwife. She was so interesting, and I wish her character didn’t get gutted for the sake of her male family and rushed love interest

#tokyo ghoul #rant #touka kirishima #ayato kirishima #tokyo ghoul meta #tokyo ghoul criticism

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lazyliars · 3 years

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Tubbo for the character breakdown? :D

How I feel about this character

c!TUBBO MY BELOVED.

The Sidekick. The Yes-man. The Pawn. The Child Soldier. The President. The Government. The Revolutionary. The Fool. The Scientist. The Husband. The Best-friend. The Leader. The Follower. The Underestimated.

Tubbo is a man with many titles, and as the situation calls for it, he can wear any of them comfortably.

Tubbo is defined, more than a lot of characters, by those titles, and by who calls him by which ones. The roles that he has played over his tenure on the server have left a more dramatic impact on both how he is perceived by others, and his own self-image.

He’s Tommy’s Sidekick and Best-friend - but he’s also Ranboo’s Husband, and Snowchester’s Leader, and A Scientist with Jack Manifold, and an (ex) President to Techno, and a Pawn to Dream.

What's interesting is that this relationship with titles is one he shares with Technoblade, and it's a unique way in which they foil each other. None of either of their other foils really share this dynamic, and to add to it, they both propagate this in each other. The difference is in how they deal with, feel about, and utilize it.

Techno is “The Blade” and “The Blood God,” and he hates it. He feels used, objectified, and reduced to a weapon by these titles. At the same time however, the actions he ends up taking only reinforces the way the average people perceive him – violence, blood and anarchy. The reputation Techno has aqquired often overshadows the person who might prefer to be seen as.

Tubbo on the other hand, tends to slip into the these titles without much resistance. He accepts them, sometimes for better and sometimes for worse. He's happy to be Tommy's sidekick; He takes on the role of President of L'manberg; He accepts Dream's metaphor for himself as a Pawn. But to his advantage, his flexibility within these roles and the ability to put them on and take them off as he pleases gives him a uniquely wide arsenal of social tools.

There is so much more to say about c!Tubbo but If I keep going I could be here for hours...

All the people I ship romantically with this character

I am an enjoyer of his marriage with Ranboo, although I wouldn't call myself a shipper really.

I think their dynamic as two people who value kindness, but who also possess the capacity to be surprisingly ruthless, makes them an unusually dangerous and honestly, somewhat thematically opposed pair.

Tubbo is one of the people on the server who has the longest and most consistent relationship with what Ranboo would consider “sides” which automatically sets him up as a foil. Before even L'manberg, it was Tommy and Tubbo vs. Dream, and Tubbo has always held that loyalty close to his heart, and likely wont be cutting that off anytime soon. As a consequence of this, he naturally adds Ranboo to the list of people “on his side,” quietly, but surely.

Ranboo's somewhat correct, somewhat misidentification of “sides” as the root of all conflict on the server, in contrast to Tubbo, drives him to be more individualistic, “choosing people over sides.” And accordingly, it would be a stretch to call him a member of Snowchester, despite how deeply entrenched he's become in it's founder's life. At the same time, it's clear that Tubbo is one of, if not the most important person to Ranboo out of everyone on the server, and he's willing to do anything to protect him.

All in all, Ranboo and Tubbo end up being an odd couple for a multitude of reasons, who, despite some very core differences in personal philosophy, both end up caring for each other ferociously.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

I would love to be contrarian here, but I just can't. Clingy Duo 4 LYFE!

Tommy and Tubbo's friendship, from the start of their time on the server to the current day, has been one “thing” that I continually return to, and that the story over all returns to. They are the emotional anchor of the server in a lot of ways – both a representation of it's innocent, idyllic past, and it's forward march into a darker future. Whenever the narrative wants to make a story beat feel strong and impactful, they'll often end it by echoing the scene on the bench that started everything, whether or not it's Tubbo and Tommy specifically; their Bond resonates so strongly throughout the DNA of the story that their Bench has become a Symbolic Archetype all in itself, and is something that no longer even requires the two of them present to recall it's power as a representation of Attachments, Loyalty and Platonic Love.

TLDR; Clingy Duo is the glue that keeps the core of the story together, and intentionally or not, most important friendships will end up either paralleling or foiling them by the sheer fact of how impactful their relationship is to the greater narrative.

My unpopular opinion about this character

I don't know how unpopular or not this opinion might be, but I do consider Tubbo to be a darker character than a lot of the content for him I see produced.

One way this expressed: he's incredibly pessimistic. He's a person who lives his life hyper aware of how easy it is to die, and with a full acceptance that, if a worst case scenario should arrive on his doorstep, he would die without hesitation, if he had to.

That isn't to say he isn't invested in preventing that, far from it – but there is an undercurrent of absolute certainty that he is living on borrowed time.

One interesting development on this is how he's expressed this – during the Disc Finale, Tubbo has already accepted his own death. He tells Tommy that he's “done enough” and that he should let him die so that Tommy can have his disc back. He tries to get Tommy to resign, to not fight Dream in the end because he can tell that they've already lost and he doesn't want him to have to die too or suffer more.

Contrast this to Snowchester now – as we've learned that the Nukes have dead-mans switch; a suicide button, that only Tubbo knew about. It's a far more proactive expression of this mentality, a final ace up his sleeve, so to speak, so that if an unwinnable situation should occur again, he can turn it from a loss into sick kind of pyrrhic victory.

It's important to note that Tubbo has not yet projected or pressed this mentality onto others; this is self destruction only, and I do think that says something about him, although it's less positive and more tragic.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

VILLAIN ARC. VILLAIN ARC. VILLAIN ARC.

Okay, as a specific example, there is sooooo much missed potential for Egg!Tubbo (and Egg!Tommy) and I will die on this hill.

Imagine, in a world where Tommy isn't immune: Tubbo gets trapped and infected by the egg, as it offers to grant him the one thing he wants most in the world.

The vines grow around Snowchester, seeping into the cracks in it's walls and then hardening into a scaly form, creating a shell around his home. The ambient radiation causes the egg to grow faster in this area, and form odd spikes that loom outwards from the heart of the town, like blades pointed at anything that gets too close.

Tommy realizes too late what's happened, and when he tries again and again to convince Tubbo to just come with him, please come with him to Church Prime, he’s sure that they can find a way--

--he ends up letting Tubbo lead him, and follows him down to the depths of the egg.

When the doors behind them are covered in thick vines, and the humidity of the room increases, and every breath feels like it draws in clouds of dust, it’s already too late to run.

Tubbo stays with Tommy for the two weeks it takes for his will to break and the egg to infiltrate his mind; it's offers of wealth and vengeance and rebuilding L'manberg and resurrecting Wilbur and making people love him and making him powerful and giving him the whole world--

--all rejected, until finally, in the sickening red haze of Tommy's mind, a single scene; a clear blue red sky, the sun high and bright, a warm breeze blowing in, a bench, the sound of good music, and there--

Tubbo moves and the vines around him creak, having been undisturbed for days. He places his hand on the mass of crimson where Tommy is trapped waiting.

--Tommy grins and rushes forwards, all of the weight in his heart, all of the dread and responsibility and fear and anger and hurt and pain, all of it suddenly gone on the breeze as he takes his place next to Tubbo on the bench.

The Eggpire grows. The vines begin to appear in more vulnerable places – peoples secret rooms, near their pets, wherever they keep their most sentimental objects.

Tommy loves causing harmless mischief, and the feeling of being accepted, of being cared for? It's perfect. Nothing can touch him now, where everything is simple and easy and just the way it should be.

Tubbo knows. It's not a deep feeling, it's not a secret part of himself still in there, still fighting. He knows, and when he sees Bad staring him down, piercing through him, he knows that Bad knows too.

There is no kinship for them. There can't be. That would be too close to rebellion against The Crimson. That would be too close to comfort.

But Tubbo knows quietly. He's not a follower by nature, but he'll follow now, simply because he's seen the most logical way to attain what he wants.

And he and Tommy will make a kinder, safer world then the one the Crimson is eating now.

#i lowkey wrote fic at the end there??#who knew i had it in me lmaoo #dream smp #tubbo #thank you for the ask Khizuo :D

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johnkrrasinski · 4 years

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Into It;

full masterlist

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x female!reader

Word count: 1,485

Warning: SMUT. sexy times, cuss words, fluff.

Summary: a casual sunday afternoon spent with your favorite super soldier who just couldn’t resist you no matter how hard he tries.

a/n: another sexy bucky fanfic that i thought about whilst trying to take a nap on a sunday afternoon. please leave a like & comment. enjoy!

The midafternoon sun permeated through the drawn curtains of your room in the Avenger’s compound on another archetypal Sunday. It was a day where everyone in the team could just sleep in until noon, lounge around in the common and do their own thing without care.

Well, not too careless though, since you were still The Avengers after all, and the world doesn’t believe in the concept of ‘weekends are days off’ when miscreants have made up their minds about committing their evil plan and living in a building designed to keep all the on-watch heroes together so they’d be ready whenever the alarm of emergency goes off, you constantly had to sleep with one eye open at night.

Even if when you were simply taking forty winks.

But not today. Today, you only left the coziness of your bed to shower, eat some breakfast and fetch a few snacks and occasionally used the loo. The rest was spent with you cuddled up with Bucky in nothing but your underwear separating your skin from each other. Bucky would regularly go for his early morning run but not on Sundays. Sundays were for him and you. And he wasn’t going to waste a goddamn second with you when the chaos strikes once more tomorrow. Sundays were too precious.

You had been watching sitcoms all day that you hadn’t had the chance to finish it due to incessant missions and paperwork. The superhero life doesn’t exactly reward you a protracted repose despite the number of lives you had saved. So when you were granted the opportunity to watch Brooklyn 99 with the love of your life who was just as fatigued as you were, you were going to savour every second of it.

Things were going languid up until you turned on another side as Bucky spooned you from behind. Bucky’s hunger for you wouldn't allow him to stay still for a second without him getting an erection. What can you say? He just really had a thing for your ass. When your eyes were fixated on the screen, Bucky began peppering your neck and your shoulder with kisses.

Since you were only clad in nothing but your underwear, it didn’t make it difficult for him to graze his fingers along your waistline to your hip, and then he moved his hand to between your thighs as you part them slightly to permit him more access to your most sensitive part.

He inserted his fingers into your panties as he collected the wetness that was already gathering there since the moment he pressed his lips to your neck. You threw your head back to his shoulder as he carried on his pampers on your neck to your shoulder. He motioned his fingers in a circle on your clit, causing your head to spin. His touch always left you breathless and you always ended up craving for more.

“Oh, Bucky…” You bit your lip.

“So wet for me, baby.”

His motion grew hastier to get you off as he sensed your impending climax. You shut your eyes trying to relish the pleasure as you moaned for his name. You were so damn close and with a few more circles, you crumbled. Your release soaked your cotton underwear along with Bucky’s fingers that were still on your clit until you were thoroughly spent.

He retrieved his hand out of your panties and sucked on his fingers that you made a mess off. He tasted you as if he was licking his favourite sweetened cocoa spread sticking on them. You were still panting when you felt him pulling down your underwear and threw them onto the floor. You were still lying on your side when you felt the nudge of his head on your entrance as he quickly penetrated you.

It knocked the breath off your lungs when he was fully seated. His grip on your hip was riveted as he stayed still to let you adjust to his girth inside you. When you ground your arse against him, he instantly got the clue that you wanted him to move. He then complied, fulfilling your desire as he began rutting his into you steadily. He took his time, pleasuring you at a settled pace. It wasn’t lust-driven or a poignant need, it was simply you and him, making love on a dawdling day off; there’s no rush, there’s no agony, it was just you and him exploring each other’s body.

You turned your head to the side to gaze at his handsome face. The short strands of his hair and the neat stubble covering his entire jaw made him look more dashing under the faint afternoon glow. You were always so charmed by Bucky’s looks even before he cut his hair and trimmed his beard. You were allured by his gentle demeanour and his mysterious haze.

It wasn’t long until you felt your second release coming. Bucky accelerated his tempo as you felt the tightening coil in your belly. With only a few more thrusts and the bubble inside you erupted. It was more intense than the previous one and you were drowned in bliss. Bucky extended his thrusts, prolonging your orgasm until he reached his own.

He growled as he was lost in his own euphoria. He rested his head on the side of yours as he held you close in the same position whilst still being inside you until every drop of his cum was stored. He’d never admit it out loud but he loved it when he released deep inside you. He loved the sight of a part of him dripping on your thighs.

You turned your head once more to look at him as he kissed you deeply, the fervour on his lips was palpable. Your tongues tangled with each other’s as his hand that was grappling to your hip moved to your jaw to guide your mouth to have more control over it. You kept devouring each other until you were running out of air.

Bucky’s breath felt like a breeze on your face as he lovingly gazed into your striking eyes, as he once declared. For a moment there, there wasn’t a single word exchanged, it was simply the abounding love that you had for each other and it was more than any word could express.

“You never fail to amaze me, doll.”

You bit your lip at his praise. “I could say the same, soldier.”

“Think we should go back to the show. Captain Holt’s going to start with his boring facts again.” He withdrew himself away from you and laid back on his side of the bed. His eyes were now on the screen presenting Jake Peralta’s comical personality that contrasted with Captain Holt’s deadpan face. It always elicited a chuckle from Bucky.

You sat up and budged to Bucky’s hip, making yourself a comfortable seat. “…or we can go back to our own festive. It’s a lot more fun than listening to Captain Holt’s boring facts.” You repeated his words to playfully tease him while also trying to seduce him.

“Hmm… I don’t know, I kinda like Captain Holt’s boring facts and it’s interesting to hear him talk about the population rate of Philadelphia.”

“Oh really? So it’s more interesting than this, huh?” You climbed down his body to lay on your front between his legs and you began stroking his shaft then proceeded to swirling your tongue around it like a goddamn chocolate chip ice cream on a sizzling summer day. You loved the look on his face when he lost himself in pleasure. The pleasure that you bestowed on him.

“Fuck yeah, baby, just like that.” You kept sucking him up and down until he was zoned out enough in eroticism and you retrieved. The shift on his face nearly cracked you up, to say he was disappointed was an understatement. It was unmistakable that he wanted you to keep going.

“Why’d you stop?”

“Well, you said that Captain Holt’s facts were more interesting than our copulation so maybe you should go back to the show and just let me be.”

“Fuck no baby, I didn’t mean that.”

“You gotta do better than that, Barnes.”

“Please, baby? I’ll do anything.”

“Anything?”

“Any-fucking-thing. What wouldn’t I do for you, doll?”

His pleading face was too adorable to resist and you were planning to return the favour before he begged anyway, so you returned to your previous spot as you pushed him down the bed. He was looking at you with so much eagerness and you couldn’t wait to watch the look on his face when he was about to ejaculate deep within your mouth, quenching your thirst of him.

The day was still long and you were keen to spend the rest of it stimulating one another, defiling the immaculacy of your pristine white sheets.

Man, you really did love Sundays.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fluff #sebastian stan fanfic #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan fic #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x y/n #sebastian stan smut #sebastian stan one shot #bucky barnes au #sebastian stan

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slasherscream · 4 years

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I just found your blog and I love it! I saw your chill!Latina!reader x Poly! ghostface and I raise you a Latina!reader with absolutely no chill? Like someone says something even remotely insulting towards them or the boys and they're immediately cursing them out in Spanish and English.

the duality.... of latina adjkl-

Woodsboro.... straight up wasn’t ready for you.

It is important, in the cut throat land of high school, to immediately establish oneself as someone to not be messed with. This is especially crucial if you are entering a new high school in the middle of senior year.

This would be a big yikes for absolutely anyone. But you? You waltz into the school with your head held high, you make eye contact with everyone and walk like if someone is in your way you will simply run them over and not pause to check if your shoes left marks on their back.

The boys hear about you but they don’t seek you out or anything. They’re curious, of course, but it’s not that huge of a school and they know that they’ll run into you sooner or later.

They have a few classes with you but you keep your mandatory “class introduction” short and sweet like no one has a #Right to know anything about you. Billy respects that he knows nothing about you besides the fact that you clench your jaw when you’re annoyed.

It’s about a week in when someone finally decides to test you.

One of the more popular girls in school is getting a little jealous that you’re all anyone can talk about. Wanting to knock you down a peg she tries to trip you at lunch in the hopes that you’ll make a mess of yourself.

You wind up spilling your food but manage to not fall on the floor. Everyone watches with baited breath for your reaction. They expect you to run off crying in embarrassment, instead you whirl around on the girl like the devil. By the end of you absolutely reading her for filth she’s the one who leaves the cafeteria in tears. You get another tray of food, find a table, and eat in peace.

At that point you have the whole school’s attention. But who cares about everyone. The important thing is you caught the attention of the dangerous duo.

Stu is the one who approaches you first as the people person.

They’re not sure about what they want to do with you honestly. That little display of fire was.... intriguing. You have final girl archetype written all over you. The people they kill so rarely put up a fight it can almost get boring. But before they finalize any plans they want to know you. The wait makes the kill all the sweeter.

It takes you quite awhile to warm up to Stu. Frankly you’re just trying to do your time and then get the hell out of dodge. You go to school, deal with your insufferable classmates and teachers, and go home to unwind. But Stu is nothing if not persistent.

He’s everywhere you turn and eventually his presence just becomes a non-factor. You’ll be digging through your locker for your books, sense someone looming over you from behind and just say, “Hi Stu” - because that’s how on your jock he is.

You wouldn’t call yourself friends exactly but you’re comfortable with him.

One day you happen to be looking for a movie at the local video store. You notice that Stu is in there talking to another boy but don’t take much note until your perusing of movie options brings you close enough to hear their conversation.

You don’t hear the asshole thing Stu said that prompted Randy to insult Stu’s intelligence rather harshly all you see is Stu’s face falling ever so slightly before he masks it behind a mischievous grin. You step in front of Stu instantly on the defense, “Who do you think you’re calling stupid with a face like that? ¡Vete a la mierda! Beat it, gringo.” and poor Randy runs off wondering how he became the bad guy during a run in with Stu of all people but whatever he knows when he’s in danger and makes himself scarce.

Stu is #Shook because first off he rarely needs to be defended, he can handle himself, and second of all just... no one has ever really jumped in when people are mocking him (even though he admittedly deserves it sometimes) and believe it or not people thinking he’s stupid is a sore subject for him even though he acts like he’s the popular class clown that could care less.

Now he has heart eyes for you and you really can’t get rid of him.

When Stu comes running to Billy talking about they just can’t kill you is when Billy has to step in and see what’s so special about you that you’re suddenly above being their latest victim.

After a few group hangouts he starts to get it.

You’re vibrant, and passionate, and have so much fire in you that sometimes it can’t help but come out in bursts of you not being able to take a single ounce of bullshit and they’re in love.

Billy flirts with you by pissing you off, full warning. He loves watching you get riled up and really loves the way you look at him before you’re about to let him HAVE IT. He’s never really been around a girl who doesn’t just melt for him. He likes that he’ll poke at you and you’ll poke right on back, never backing down.

Stu just follows you around like a loyal puppy dog. He likes to annoy you a little here and there but not in the same way that Billy does. Billy likes to challenge you and see how far he can go, always testing his limit. Stu just likes to annoy you because then he has your undivided attention. He’s a kindergartner pulling on his crush’s pigtails.

Honestly you’re probably all going to be just friends for awhile until Stu finally convinces you to come to one of his parties where you will promptly be hit on and before you can rip the guy to shreds ENTER PLAYER ONE aka Billy Loomis who looks like he’s going to pop a blood vessel as he grabs the guy and asks him what the hell he thinks he’s doing talking to you.

Once he gets rid of the guy you ask him who does he think he is running off guys for you and he’ll just snap and kiss you because the sexual tension has been there for like two months now and he can’t take it anymore.

You guys are full on making out when Stu tracks you both down and you instantly pull away because Oh God You Also Care About Stu This Is A Nightmare but before you can panic Stu has pushed himself into your side and asked in the huskiest voice if there’s room for one more so there’s.....that.

Everyone is so mad that you managed to snag the two hottest guys in school but they don’t dare say anything because....well, you’re you and no one wants to have their ass verbally handed to them.

Every single one of your tirades is legendary. Do people respect you or do they fear you? Doesn’t matter because the end result is people leave you all alone about your relationship.

Both the boys think it’s hilarious that people are so scared of you when they’re the coldblooded killers.

You and Billy get into a lot of small spats because you both have tempers and don’t like to apologize because that’s admitting you were wrong and you’re both always sure that the other one is in the wrong and you are the long suffering tolerant partner. Stu is constantly cooling the both of you down until you can admit you both let things get out of hand. You’re both very clingy whenever you come out of these little fights. You missed each other while you were being stubborn :(((

The first time they tried to sneak into your room through your window you nearly killed them because you started hurling the heaviest shit you could find and they both almost fell like...two stories. Stu got his nose lightly bruised (not even broken!!!) and whined about it for weeks. You argued that they could’ve given you a damn warning before they tried to pull a Romeo and Juliet on you.

High-key Billy wonders if you might one day be their third ghostface. He imagines you taunting and snapping at victims with that razor sharp tongue over the phone before the three of you close in on them like the prey they are and slaughter them. He wonders if you’d be as vicious with a knife as you can be with your words.

They’re working up the nerve to tell you about their little....hobby. They know your initial reaction is bound to be intense so they’ve already braced themselves for that they’re just not sure what will happen after. The thought of losing you because you can’t wrap your head around what they’re doing scares the shit out of them but they also know the longer they don’t tell you the more upset you’ll be, you demand 100% transparency from them because you can’t tolerate bullshit.

For now they relish the dynamic you all have together and tell themselves that no matter what your first reaction is they’ll just remind you of how much you all need each other. You’re their perfect fit and you always will be, they’re sure of that.

#billy loomis x reader x stu macher #billy loomis x reader #stu macher x reader #billy loomis imagine #stu macher imagine #slasher x reader #latina!reader #this took FOREVER my love and for that i am SORRY #morning-star-57

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manychocolatefactories · 3 years

Text

CatCF Ruby Chocolate: Part 1, Kids and characters

This version is the last of the "four main versions". It is named after the new, fourth type of chocolate discovered in 2004 but only publically released in 2017. It is a modern version, supposed to take place in the 2010s. In this version, there are six Golden Tickets released in the world.

First Winner: Augustus Gloop

(Based on: Augustus Gloop)

This version of Augustus was inspired by the 2013 musical, more specifically by the idea of a cute little boy that eats "pigs limbs from limbs", and also swallows whole little dogs. So, something quite dark.

Augustus has a very cute face. A chubby, angelic face, like the puttis of the Renaissance paintings: blond curls, puppy eyes, a radiant smile. If he wants, he can make your heart melt like the video of a little kitten purring.

But Augustus is hungry. All of the time. He eats and snacks all day long. He dreams of food. He sleep-walks to eat. And while he adores candies and chocolate, there is one thing he loves more than anything else: meat. Meat and blood. He is a true carnivore, for him every meal rhymes with "meat". And if you leave him unattended, he will try to get meat by himself. For exemple, by attacking a living pig and devouring it on the spot. Or by biting off the fingers of a plump woman. But, of course, all of that with a cute smile and while saying sorry in the most adorable way.

Nowadays, if your cute you must be innocent, and thus forgien.

Augustus' body is not as cute as his face. It is said to be a "bloated mass of pink flesh", actually very similar to the body of a pig. His fatness is described as "ill-fitting", as if it was "forced" onto his body. His overweightness is not natural. It is puffy, flabby, bloated, but doesn't feel "natural".

Augustus also always wear ill-fitting clothes and suits.

Mrs. Gloop is a tiny woman, usually wearing a pale pink skirt suit, with her hair arranged in a crown of braids. She might be tiny, but she is bold, energetic, and speaks both clearly and loudly. She has so much presence, she often intimidates people. She keeps reminding others of how cute her son, and how eating makes him grow strong. She insists that she is a good mother who makes sure her son eats of everything (to have a balanced diet), eats well (by giving him only the finest and best-quality products (such as the Wonka bars and not their cheap rivals knock-offs), and of course, she only feeds her son because he "needs nourishment".

And don't dare criticize her, or she will scream so much, so hard and so high your ears will bleed. Just like the "original" Mrs. Gloop, this one keeps pointing out the "hooligans", saying it is better to stay at home eating food than being a violent thug on the street. My iteration sincerely believes that violence and criminality is due to poverty, hunger and lack of food, and if everyone was well-fed the world ould be at peace.

(For her, think of Mrs. Gloop the original, mixed with Bernadette from the Big Bang Theory )

Mr. Gloop (full name, Gordon Gloop, parody of Gordon Ramsey) is the son of a butcher, and the grandson of a slaughterhouse worker. He was always knee-deep in blood, and as a result grew accustomed to killing animals and cooking them (in fact the sight of blood makes him peckish). He is a tall and strong man, but suffers from a bad sleep due to his wife's horribly loud snoring.

He tried to teach his son the refinment of haute cuisine, for Mr. Gloop is a world-renowned cook, but to his disappointment Augustus only cares for raw meat and drinking blood-dipped candies. Mr. Gloop is so obsessed with having good dishes and best-quality ingredients, he keeps at the back of his house a little barnyard full of cattle (if he ever has to serve some steak or ribs to his guests). Trouble is, Augustus keeps sneaking into said barnyard to devour the poor animals.

Second Winner: Elvira Entwhistle

(Based on: Veruca Salt)

Veruca Salt being a pretty solid and complete archetype in herself (the girl who wants it all and has her parents buy her all), it is quite hard to reimagine her. So, I tried thinking about "why" she wants things - given the actions are settled and confirmed, it is the goals that are important, the motivation. And , in our time of modernity, what makes people want things? Trends, fashions, what is "in".

This reinterpretation of Veruca, named Elvira Entwhistle (after one of the old drafts names), is a mix between Chanel Oberlin from Scream Queens and Esmé Squalor from a Series of Unfortunate Events. She is a girl living for trends, for fashions, buying and acquiring all of the latest things "in", only to discard them as soon as they are "out" or not trendy anymore. Spending her time on social media, following models and influencers, she keeps going to luxury shops with her "personal assistant" (a nice name for what is a modern slave) to buy accessories, jewels, clothes, pets and whatever corresponds to the current trend.

Spoiled, impatient, self-centered and short-tempered, she needs to have the latest fashion NOW or she will get insanely angry. She also doesn't hesitate to change her personal appearance to fit all the new trends (for exemple her hair changes color and shape every week). Of course, she got her Golden Ticket because it was the current trend. Everyone was searching for it, so she had to get a Ticket to be the most "in" person around.

Third Winner: Mike Teavee

(Based on: Mike Teavee)

For this version of Mike Teavee, I wanted to get away from the usual hyperactive and hyper-violent kid. I wanted to take back this common idea that television makes you stupid and sluggish, by making Mike the perfect embodiment of a couch potato (even though he was designed to look at the same time like a mushroom and a zombie).

Mr. and Mrs. Teavee are hard-working people, who spend their entire week working and only come back at home for very brief periods of times (usually in the week-end) before going right back at work. As a result, Mike barely knows his parents. He doesn't even know what kind of work they do. To "babysit" their son, the Teavees bought an enormous, high-definition television with a 666 channels pack, and kept telling him to not go outside due to the outside world being "dangerous" and filled with crushing bikes, killing cars, kidnappers and the like. This is how Mike began his life as a shut-in.

Spending his days looking at the television, never going outside, he ended up closing all shutters because light bothered him. Living in the dark, barely lifting his body from the couch, he only survives on candies, snacks, television-plates and microwaved/defrosted food (and the Teavee family can afford to buy a lot of it, because they are really, really rich - Mike has accounts in three different banks).

The result? A chalk-white boy. A bloated ans shapeless body. A full-moon face covered in craters and scars due to a bad case of acne. Two dead, sunken, small eyes. Speakin slowly, and often pronouncing only half of the words, Mike refuses to answer or talk to anyone while television is on : he only speaks during "uninteresting advertisements". The only thing muscular in his body are his fingers, that got a lot of muscle mass due to twitching frenetically all day long on the remote to channel-hop.

Mike is actually a very intelligent boy, but all his cleverness and intellectual gifts are buried and wasted by the brain-washing of his shut-in life and his television obsession. He got his Golden Ticket because his parents often buy him Wonka bars as "television snacks". Even though, in his own words, he prefers food that "tastes like plastic".

Fourth Winner: Violet Beauregarde

(Based on: Volet Beauregarde)

What is Violet, originally? She is a girl that seeks fame and attention, that is snarky, that is nasty towards people, and that does stupid records. What reflects that perfectly in our day and age? Reality television shows!

Violet Beauregarde was strongly inspired by the most brainless and "sassy/nasty" stars of reality television and the Internet. She is a teenage girl wearing clothes of such bright, flashy and clashing colors it often hurts people's eyes. Her face is covered in makeup, her hair is covered in extensions and her hands are covered with fake fingernails.

She thinks she can be as rude and horrible as she wants, as long as she calls it "sassy". But on the other side, she considers "rude" anyone or anything that doesn't please her, or that is too "ugly" or "dirty" for her. She is the kind of girl that keeps screaming loudly "YAAAAAAASSS, bitches!" and "DAAAMMMNNNN", that calls herself "the queen", that chews ferociously on her gum all day long, and that says "Why are you touching me? See, you're touching me again!" while she is the one hitting people. She hates everything "old" and "boring". She keeps publishing musical albums that nobody actually buys, because she sings badly mere words (her singles being titled "Lalalala" and "Heyheyheyhey" - she never understood a song needed to have lyrics). Finally, her biggest dream is to be part of a TV-reality show.

Her father, Mr. Beauregarde, feeds his daughter's "bitchy diva" attitude and her delusions of grandeur by acting as his agent (just like in the 2013 musical). He is also the "ringleader" of Violet's circus (because Violet, with her clothes of ridiculous colors, and her enormous amount of makeup, has a clown subtext). As a result, Mr. Beauregarde is like a ringleader in acircus, a showrunner in a freak show, and also an agent. He "sells" his daughter, he organizes her interviews, he has people pay money for "extra time" with Violet, he shows her around, and finally he uses his whip (yes, he has a whip) to attack all those that try to "touch the product".

He is a short, flabby and balding man, that smokes very long and thick cigars, wears enormous rings and clothes that are garrish and clownish - his over-the-top and ridiculous fashion sense is clearly a compensation for what he lacks in height, hair and health.

Fifth Winner: Marvin Prune

(Based on: Marvin Prune)

In the original drafts of Roald Dahl, Marvin Prune was a Mr. Know-it-All, a too-perfect schoolboy obsessed with studies, an arrogant bookworm, a haughty teacher's pet, you named it. In this version, i decided to keep the idea of Marvin being a "know-it-all", but instead of using school, books and the like, he rather uses modern technology and the Internet.

Marvin is a tech-obsessed boy. He lives for, with and through technology, to the point of neglecting to live in the real world. He thinks his over-use of technology, and all the knowledge it can provide him, make him an "intelligent" and "superior" boy (when in fact it does not).

He thinks he can claim to have been everywhere in the world because he visited virtually all the most important landmarks of the world. He claims he can speak all the languages in the world, but in fact he uses translation websites. He keeps tracks of all his bodily functions thanks to health monitors (heartbeats, blood pressure, cholesterole...) but not because he is concerned for his health, merely for the sake of knowing more things. For him, Googling something is the best solution to all your troubles, and as a result he is a self-centered and pompous boy.

Due to his technology dependance, Marvin is actually quite a weak boy. Since he doesn't do any sport or physical activity, and since he rarely leaves his house (due to always ordering things online, having classes online and visiting places virtually), he is a quite thin and frail boy, if not emaciated - at least, a good chunk of his muscle mass has melted away.

The original parents of Marvin Prune were, in Dahl's works, teachers and school principals. I decided here to go with the opposite of a teacher : Mrs. Prune never does anything herself, and always blame it on others. There are problems in the world? For her people should fix it, but they are too lazy to do it - while she herself does nothing about it. Her son acts rude? "Someone should teach him good manners" she says. She loses all of her money? "That's because the people in charge of the economy are all incompetent!"

Mrs. Prune thinks of everything and everyone as stupid because it allows her to blame all of her problems and flaws on other people. But ultimately she never takes any kind of action herself. If someone should teach her son good manners, it is "those lazy teachers at school", certainly not her! She also dislikes things that are "foreign".

Marvin found the Golden Ticket when he ordered by mistake a chocolate bar in France : in truth, he wanted to buy a "tablet" (in French a tablet is tablette, and a chocolate bar is also a tablette de chocolat).

Marvin will also be incredibly frustrated inside Wonka's factory, because in there numeric devices mess up, stop weirdly or disfunction totally (the same way UFOs tend to mess up phones, radios, computers and the like). As a result, he becomes powerless and helpless.

Sixth Winner: Charlie Bucket

(Based on: Charkie Bucket)

Here, I decided to really twist things up. To have a Charlie Bucket that isn't thin or malnourished, but fat! Yes, here's Chubby Charlie! (No, not Fat Charlie, this one is copyrighted)

Charlie's story is deeply linked to the story of the Wonka factory. The town Charlie lives in was built around the Wonka Factory a bit before the 20th century - it was a "worker town", created to allow the workers of the factory to live with their family next to their place of work. For more than fifty years the Factory was the only occupation and work of the town. But somewhere in the 1950s or 1960s, all the workers had to take an early retirement. They were kicked out, and the Factory closed to the public. The Factory was still working, but not hiring anyone anymore. This was an enormous blow to both the town's economy and moral. There was an economic crisis and poverty (since people were trained only to work in a candy factory).

But there was one good thing: since it was the town Wonka's products were created in, they were sold at must cheaper prices than anywhere else in the world, and all the ex-workers of the Factory got in exchange for their work coupons and reductions for themselves and all of their families - reductions on the Wonka products, of course. This was seen as a chance, because the Wonka products were world-renowned candies, even luxury goods in foreign countries. It was like being able to buy haute-couture as daily clothes and eat gastronomic cuisine every week-end.

But this good wasn't so "good". Indeed, given the poverty and lack of job in town, the ex-workers and their family relied more and more on the coupons and reductions, their diets filled with candy and sugary products. As a result, from the 1970s to the 2010s, the number of people suffering from obesity, diabetes and teeth problems blew up.

[ This background is actually a mix of two different real-world fact. Real-world fact 1: the Menier Chocolate Factory in France, aka the real-life Wonka Factory, was revolutionary for creating a town for its workers, and taking care of their health, education and the like, but closed after World War II, to the deception of everyone. Real-world fact 2: Coca-Cola, Nestlé and other big food industries tend to pay their employees with extra-sugary and extra-addictive if their own products in poor areas, such as South America - resulting in sicknesses and diseases.]

As a result, in this version Charlie is fat. Because in modern days, and in developped countries, poverty and malnourishment actually leads to obesity and diabetes, due to the cheapest food being candies and junk-food.

This version of Charlie is a very nice kid, but a kid addicted to the Wonka products. He grew up on the coupons, due to his family all being ex-workers. Grandpa Joe and Grandpa George both worked at the factory, but were too old or sick after being fired to find a new job ; Mr. and Mrs. Bucket had been trained for the factory and could barely afford new studies after its closing. Mr. Bucket became a street cleaner, while Mrs. Bucket became a receptionist and secretary for a dental office (due to the rise of tooth diseases, dental offices boomed in town, but most are actually crooked or scams).

Charlie grew up in a very humble home, with two parents working really hard to have enough money to buy food for everyone. Of course, fresh or good food is too expensive. Charlie tries to help his family the best way he can with his part-time job (making people fill surveys) and by working really hard at school. But as the years go by, his weight and his health are beginning to cause problems. Due to not having any money he can't do sports, wich makes him gain weight, and the fattest he is the hardest it is to do sport, it's a vicious circle. Every year, the scale reveals he puts on more and more weight, and faster and faster - if he doesn't do something quick, he may end up obese.

And, as I mentionned before, Charlie is truly obsessed with the Wonka products, it is an addiction. He dreams of them at night. He sticks Wonka bars wrappers on the wall of his room like posters. He drools at the mere mention of a Wonka bar. He isn't spoiled, cruel or nasty, but he is too addicted for his own good. In fact, when he finds money in the stret and buy chocolate bars with it, it is a pure act of selfishness, because he doesn't have the willpower to turn away from the candy shop and go back home.

#catcf #charlie and the chocolate factory #charlie bucket #augustus gloop #veruca salt #mike teavee #violet beauregarde #marvin prune

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zaph1337 · 3 years

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Monster Hunter Rating 30: Fatalis, the Dark Demise

The world of Monster Hunter is a dangerous one. Monsters with powers unlike any animal we know run rampant, and some of them are so powerful as to be compared to natural disasters, or maybe even gods. These “Elder Dragons” are viewed as forces of nature given body and mind, and wherever they are, they’re almost always at the top of the food chain. But it begs the question: what is the strongest Elder Dragon of them all?

Some would say that Lao-Shan Lung, the Old Mountain Dragon, holds that honor. After all, it will destroy entire mountains if they stand in its path, and every hunt with one is a race against time to prevent the monster from reaching and destroying the fortresses that separate it from the settlements it would crush beneath its feet as it wanders. But why does Lao-Shan Lung wander? Why does it never go around the obstacles in its way? Why will it never fight back against the hunters that pose a serious threat of killing it? The answer is one that no one wants to accept: Lao-Shan Lung, what may be the living incarnation of an avalanche or some other seismic force, is not wandering. It’s running for its life. Elder Dragons may be the embodiments of natural phenomena, and though we may not like it, death is just as natural as landslides and lightning. We’ve come a long way, but it’s finally time to talk about the final boss of the first Monster Hunter game: the Black Dragon, Fatalis!

(How it appears in Monster Hunter 1)

(How it appears in Monster Hunter World: Iceborne)

Appearance: If the wiki had a third render of Fatalis that I liked, I would’ve put it up there. Anyways, Fatalis looks just like an archetypal European dragon; four legs, two wings, horned head, and a long tail. It looks pretty generic, but there are a few things that help it stand out. First off, it’s huge, being 4110.6 cm (134.9 ft) long in every main series game it appears in except for MHW:I, where it’s 4137.17 cm (135.7 ft) long. That’s 30+ ft more than Diablos or Gravios, and if you wanna see how big Fatalis is compared to a person, well...here’s an image from MHW:I:

Yyyeeah, it’s big. Something else that’s interesting is the fact that Fatalis has eyes which are literally made of crystal, which is why they look shiny in the above image. They still look a lot like traditional dragon eyes, though. In fact, basically all of its design elements are things that you’d expect to find on European dragons, which makes Fatalis look rather generic. You’d think that even in the first game, the devs would be more creative with their final boss considering the other dragons in the game, but that’s just it: Fatalis stands out when compared to a lot of the other dragons in Monster Hunter because it looks just like a European dragon and not much more. This makes it feel like it’s not just a dragon, it’s the dragon. When you hear stories of dragons wreaking mass destruction, you’ll likely imagine something that looks just like Fatalis, and I believe that that’s exactly what the developers of MH intended when they made it. It’s kinda genius, in that way, and combined with the overwhelming presence Fatalis has thanks to its size, I feel like I have to give it an 8/10.

Behavior/Lore: Since I like to cover the lore of a monster in this category anyways, I thought I might as well change its name to reflect that. Anyways, people don’t know a lot about Fatalis, such as how many there are, where there ideal habitat is, their mating rituals, stuff like that. The reason why we don’t know a lot about Fatalis is that it kills literally everything it sees, which tells us a lot on its own. Fatalis doesn’t always eat what it kills; it just kills for the sake of it, and since literally everything that breathes seems to be on its sh*t list, this has led to the conclusion that Fatalis hates all livings things on the grounds that they exist.

As I alluded to in the introduction, the natural phenomenon that Fatalis likely embodies is death itself. All other monsters are terrified of it, and, as seen with Lao-Shan Lung, will go to great lengths to stay as far from it as possible. How strong do you have to be to make a monster that bulldozes mountains run for mommy? Well, let me put it this way: Fatalis obliterated Schrade Kingdom in a single night, and now uses the ruins of the castle as its den; the very sky above the kingdom’s remains is a perpetual bloody red, with a miasma of purple clouds that hover over the fallen settlement. And that’s just what we know is true; according to legend, Fatalis could scorch all the world’s lands in a matter of days, causing the end of life itself. Obviously, this can’t be proven, nor do I know if they’re talking about one Fatalis or all of them (however many there are), but when legends like that are circulating, it’s a wonder that people aren’t living in constant fear that this thing will decide to visit their settlement one day and kill everyone. Well, not so much a wonder as it is a conspiracy; the Hunter’s Guild, fearing that the fear of Fatalis’ capabilities could lead to an outbreak of panic and anarchy, has done its best to relegate Fatalis and all stories related to it to the realm of fantasy. Only hunters who the Guild believes are skilled enough to possibly repel or kill Fatalis are allowed to know that it exists, and even then, when the Guild sends them on secret missions to fight it, they almost never come back.

Though Fatalis leaves few witnesses to its attacks, there are some who provide valuable information about the dragon’s habits. After Fatalis kills a hunter, it melts said hunter and their equipment down, then applies the remains to its body to armor its hide, making it even harder to kill. Now, some say that this is an instinctual behavior, like how the monster Nerscylla wears the hides of its prey for the same purpose, but Fatalis is only known to do this to humans, which wouldn’t make sense because killing monsters would give it more material to cover itself in. This has led some to believe that Fatalis knows that hunters make armor from the remains of the monsters they kill, so it makes armor out of them to mock them in death. If this is true, then not only is Fatalis smart enough to have a concept of irony, it harbors a special kind of hatred for humans in particular, and it presumably enjoys killing them. These things make Fatalis even more terrifying and dangerous than previously thought, and put its attack on Schrade Kingdom and its occupancy of Schrade Castle in a new light.

Speaking of equipment, the few times anyone has actually killed a Fatalis and made weapons and armor from its parts, they’ve almost always regretted it. Those that wear Fatalis armor have been victims of disturbing phenomena; horrible nightmares and periods of unnatural, unwanted strength are a common occurrence, and some have reported feeling as though something is possessing them and forcing their legs to move against their will. In extreme cases, hunters who have been knocked unconscious while wearing the armor report feeling that something was controlling their bodies before they awoke. But those people are the lucky ones; hunters who wear Fatalis armor for extensive periods of time often disappear without a trace, or even die for no apparent reason.

Not even the weapons are safe. Some cause the wielders to hear phantom screams, others induce feelings of gnawing despair or paranoia, and some are even said to corrupt the wielder’s soul, turning them into a force of bloodshed and chaos as Fatalis was...or is. In Monster Hunter Generations, a cave in Pokke Village contains a giant version of a Black Blade, a Great Sword made of Fatalis parts, which can be mined for Fatalis materials. It’s been noted that the damage done to the blade by mining it will regenerate in a matter of days; when you combine that with the symptoms of using Fatalis equipment, it gives credence to the possibility that Fatalis lives on through said equipment, controlling the bodies and minds of those that slew its corporeal form. Whether this is true or not is irrelevant; the fact remains that Fatalis equipment has a deleterious effect on those that use it, and as such, it’s recommended that none should attempt to utilize anything made from Fatalis’ remains at all.

If you thought that Fatalis as a life-form was fundamentally wrong before, then I have one last bit of absurdity for you: the one time anyone ever found a Fatalis egg, the newborn that hatched from it grew to its adult form in literal hours, and presumably hated everything that breathes from birth. Other than that, we don’t know anything about its life cycle or parental habits, and the wiki doesn’t say what happened after the baby reached maturity, but we can reasonably assume that it was a bloody event.

I’ve never been more enthralled by a monster’s lore than I have been reading about Fatalis. The developers really went out of their way to impress upon players just how unnatural and evil Fatalis is, and the result is the monster to end all monsters. I think my favorite parts are the fact that the Guild covers up Fatalis’ existence to prevent society from collapsing and how even its equipment is too dangerous to be around. And even with this, there’s still so much we don’t know about Fatalis, which makes it even more intriguing. With how much I’ve been thinking about all this the past few days, I feel like I have to give this category a 10/10.

Abilities: Obviously, Fatalis is one of the strongest monsters in the series. Its body is very durable due to its habit of melting down hunters to use as armor, and even the membranes of its wings are has hard as metal. It can both fly and charge at high speeds, with the latter doing massive damage thanks to Fatalis’ raw strength. However, its most famous ability--and its deadliest--is its fire breath, which is equal in power to some other Elder Dragons. The streams of fire that escape from Fatalis’ maw are even bigger than the dragon itself, and can be so powerful that they one-shot hunters caught in them. Fatalis can also spread a cloud of reactive powder around it; igniting this powder causes a devastating explosion.

Now, conceptually, these attributes and attacks aren’t too crazy, but there’s one more thing I want to mention: In Monster Hunter 1, you fight Fatalis in 4 quests (assuming that the wiki’s quest list for the game has all of them), and in all of those quests, the goal is “damage Fatalis as much as you can to drive him away,” not “slay Fatalis.” This means that Fatalis is so much more powerful than anything else in the game, the Guild does not believe you are capable of killing it. Despite all of your accomplishments up to that point, the Guild still doesn’t think you have what it takes to kill the darn thing. Now, considering the goal doesn’t say “slay or repel” or anything like that, I was under the impression that you couldn’t kill Fatalis in the first Monster Hunter, but a video on the wiki shows that you can, so I guess the devs phrased it that way to make you feel even cooler for achieving what even the game thought was impossible. It’s a nice touch. Anyways, Fatalis’ abilities may not sound like anything special for a dragon, but the sheer power behind its attacks, as well as how much work you have to put in to damage it in any meaningful way, gets it an 8/10.

Equipment: Since most, if not all of Fatalis’ equipment is inherently evil, I’ll mention if the descriptions say exactly what they do to the user. Let’s start ourselves off with a Hunting Horn called the Black Lute:

According to its description in MHFU, “[a]nyone who hears this Horn feels faint.” Kinda counterproductive, considering the Hunting Horn’s whole gimmick is that it buffs you and your allies with magical songs. Its upgraded form, the Fatalis Menace, isn’t much better, as “its song causes listeners to turn into disheartened beasts.” So already we see the dangers involved in using this weapon, but the description is lore that doesn’t impact gameplay, so strum to your heart’s content! As for how the Lute looks, I like the use of Fatalis horns as the majority of the main body, and the little red gem is a nice touch. Next up, something a little less evil, actually! The Dual Blades called Double Dragon require both Fatalis and Lao-Shan Lung parts, which I guess makes them okay to use?

I say that these aren’t evil because their description just says “[t]he Dragon element infused in these Dual Blades hits enemies from both sides.” Though, you do have to make them by upgrading the Fatalis Sword and Shield called the Black Sword, and according to its description, “[t]he void it creates envelopes all in its path[,]” which makes me think that these are probably still unsafe to use. Though I do like how the blades are different shapes and sizes to match up with the dragons they came from. But you know me, if a monster has a weird or goofy weapon, I gotta show it off, and Fatalis isn’t exempt from this. So here’s the Light Bowgun called the Black Parasol:

I was gonna make a JFK joke, ‘cause one of the theories surrounding his assassination was that someone used a gun disguised as an umbrella to shoot him from the side, but I don’t think I can make a joke like that without being tasteless, especially since this weapon apparently has “an assassin's thirst for death.” But here’s some tasty lore for you: the Black Parasol’s upgrade in the Japan-only MH4U, the Dark Parasol, was “designed behind the scenes by the Guild for assassination purposes.” This may be a translation of the Japanese description, so “assassination” might just mean “kill,” but it makes you think about how weird it is to call hunting a monster an assassination; there’s a chance that the Black Parasol was made by the Guild specifically to kill people, and that just raises more questions. As for the Parasol’s design, it’s so out of left field that I can’t help but find it amusing. The doily-like trim combined with the swirly handle makes it impossible to take seriously, which was probably the point.

Now, here’s where things get a bit messy; the wiki doesn’t have very many pictures of Fatalis armor. The ones it does have are small, not the standard Fatalis armor, or don’t have an image of the male armor to go with them. So, I have to resort to using the small images of the “S” armor from MHFU. I’ve made them bigger to avoid straining anyone’s eyes, but they’re all blurry now, so I apologize if I miss any details you think are important. Here’s the Blademaster armor:

Oh, my God, they gave the women’s set a helmet! Aaaannd it’s for the armor set with low-quali renders online. Yaaaay. Okay, that aside, this does look awesome. It definitely looks like armor that would make you evil if you wore it, and the curved horns on the helmet really add to that theme, as do the spikes on the arms and legs. As for the Gunner armor:

It looks really cool, too! Seems that the wings are attached to the arms in lieu of arm guards, like the ones you see on other Gunner sets. The horns on this set are pointed up this time, presumably for reasons related to peripheral vision or something like that, which is helpful for someone using a gun. The boots on the armor look like dragon feet, and combined with the wings and other design aspects, makes this armor feel like the one that’s most likely going to let Fatalis’ soul overtake you.

Overall, the equipment does what it was made to do: look powerful, yet evil at the same time. It seems like something that fanfic authors would make use of for their worldbuilding--something like how the greatest hunter in the land went missing after killing Fatalis and making equipment from it, only for horror stories of a black knight wielding cursed armaments wiping small settlements off the map and slaughtering travelers. This is the first time that equipment lore factors into the scoring for this category, and I might have to look at the descriptions of the equipment I choose in future reviews to see if that affects my opinion on it any. For now, Fatalis’ equipment gets an 8/10.

Final Thoughts and Tally: The creators of Monster Hunter wanted to make an unforgettable final boss, and they succeeded. The concept of a truly evil, apocalyptic monster in a world where most monsters are basically animals adds to its intimidation factor, and I can only imagine how kids felt when they saw Schrade Castle and the skies above it for the first time. It honestly makes me sad that I never had the original Monster Hunter as a kid, ‘cause the impression Fatalis and the fight with it would have had on me would likely have stuck with me to this day. One thing’s for sure, though: if I ever get a Monster Hunter game besides Rise, it’ll probably be Monster Hunter World and its Iceborne expansion, ‘cause aside from the Coral Islands, fighting Fatalis in a modern game would be exhilarating. 8/10.

#monster hunter #monster hunter rating #zaph1337

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sadlyafanofotomegames · 4 years

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A Road Paved with Bad Endings - Nightshade

You know why it takes so long to talk about Nameless Bad Endings? Because they’re so complicated and different from each other! There’s so many bad endings. So. Many. Bad. Endings. So why don’t we shift gears and talk about a game that limits itself to one bad ending per boy. Sometimes you get otome games where each ending is unique and fucked up in their own special way. And then sometimes its just “And then they died.” And you know what? Those endings can be just as valid. So lets get to these shinobis and ninjas and Naruto has corrupted my vision of ninjas permanently I am so sorry.

Nightshade is about Enju, daughter of the Koga Clan’s leader and the sister of the Iga Clan leader. After the Iga Clan was destroyed in a war the Koga Clan absorbed the survivors. Because of this Enju is seen as the glue keeping the Koga and Iga Clan together, and is treasured by the villagers. But Enju wants to be a real shinobi and go on missions like everyone else. One day she gets her wish, and travels with her childhood friends and mentor to complete a mission. Good news, she completed the mission! Bad news, she gets accused of killing the ruler right after.

On the way she travels with her childhood friend and bodyguard Gekkamaru, her other childhood friend and Gekkamaru’s brother Kuroyuki, and her mentor and cousin (oh no) Chojiro, as well as meeting a cold-hearted powerful ninja from another clan, Hanzo, and a libertine totally-not-a-gentleman-thief Goemon. Who’s going to be with Enju beyond the game of life-and-death she’s been forced into? Or in this case, who’s going to see her literal end?

General Thoughts on This Bad End Journey

So before I get to the boys I’ll just do an overview on how choices work here. Note that I’m playing the Switch Version. You got the boys. You got choices. First four chapters you make choices that the boy you want likes and then in chapter five that’s when the route starts (though some routes start a bit early, but each route’s choices still start in Chapter 5.) If you go to the Relationships in the Menu you’ll notice the line of boys and under each one is a line of flowers. Every time you pick a choice a boy would like, the flowers will flash on screen and the next time you check the Relationships you’ll see the flower line begin to fill in with color. Whoever’s flower is colored in the most until chapter 4 will begin the route in 5, and to get the good end you need to continue filling the line with color as much as possible. Don’t fill the line by the end? Bad Ending.

This makes it pretty simple to get the ending you want. Quick Save, make a choice, see the flowers, good. Make a choice, don’t see the flowers, bad, quick load. I’d recommend Quick Saving continuously if you’re like me and can’t stop smashing buttons like I’m trying to speedrun (I can read pretty fast) because if you’re not paying attention you’ll “A” yourself right into picking the first option of a choice that popped up. I did this more times than I would like to admit to.

On the content of the choices themselves, they’re good at connecting to the themes of each boy, so even though you can depend on the flower pop-up to keep you on the path you want you can intuitively see which choices work. This is not true for all otome games.

The Bad Endings themselves basically all lead to the same place - dead and sad. Enju dies, then boy. Or boy dies, then Enju. But each ending differentiates itself in the various flavors of how the deaths occurs and the reaction to it. Also there’s one sad song for all the bad endings and it is a mood. Despite the simplicity of it these endings do genuinely make me sad because Enju is a cutie and I love her and how dare you do this to her and dangit now I’m fond of the boys and now they’re sad and now I’m sad and I’m listening to a sad credit song and want to eat ice cream in a empty bathtub and cry for some reason. So lets be sad...together.

Spoilers for each route. Warning for Descriptions of Death and Suicide.

Goemon - It’s All Fun and Games Until You Need to Pretend You Betrayed a Cute Girl and Cause Her to Be So Sad She Doesn’t Stop Someone From Killing Her

Goemon is a gentleman thief archetype, who’s a player (or in this case libertine?) and steals from the rich to give to the poor. Goemon is the only real one because he doesn't give a single fuck about cops, shinobi rules or the hierarchy, and strives not to shed blood if he can help it, AND is always good to Enju (expect when he was forced to be mean and he literally cried about it later in the good ending.) Usually I’m not for player types, but Goemon manages to pull off being flirty and playful without coming off as pervy and careless. It helps that there’s isn’t a Mean Girl for him to flirt with to cause conflict. But then we near the ending of the route, where Goemon has to pull off a ploy to save Enju without being able to tell her the ploy, and it sucks. I knew it was a ploy from the start, but you still made her be sad gosh darnit! They managed to save the good mood of the route after that spell but just thinking about it left a sour taste in my mouth. Unless you’re in the bad end, in which case you’ll be left with the taste of TEARS.

How to Get the Bad End

Show distrust toward Goemon. Goemon, lets be honest here, looks a little sus. He pressures young ladies into going out for deserts, he’s a little flirty and doesn’t seem to take things with the right amount of seriousness, you fought him on a rooftop because he’s a notorious thief you were sent to capture, you know, it might be hard for Enju to trust him. When Enju trusts in Goemon and is ready to have a good time (no not that kind) the two really establish a bond. But on the road to the bad end Enju always had a seed of doubt in her mind about Goemon.

What Happens

The ploy Goemon came up with was to pretend to rejoin his old shinobi clan, the Fuma Clan, and deliver Enju to the Council of the Five Elder (who all want to be the regent for the late rulers son but need to avenge him by killing his murderer) and then double-crossing both the Lords and his old clan and escaping with Enju with them believing she died. Unfortunately because he’s surrounded by Fuma Clan members during this ruse he couldn’t spill the beans, thus Enju was left in the dark. Also he faked all of her friends murders. It’s not a great feeling to become so connected to someone only to find out that they killed all your friend and will send you to your death.

But in the good path Enju is able to still believe in Goemon. In the bad route...she just gives up on that line of thinking. When they reach the palace, there’s a twist Goemon wasn’t expecting. The late ruler’s Concubine and mother of the later ruler’s son enters before any of the Lords can debate who’ll execute her and kills Enju herself, and in her despair Enju lets her. Goemon then releases the poison that causes people to see illusions and kill each other. Hanzo escapes with his lord Tokugawa before it hits them.

Review

This ending fits well with Goemon because its after Enju dies because of her doubt toward him that Goemon truly betrays his beliefs. He didn’t want to kill anymore. He didn’t want to ever use the cruel techniques he was taught as a shinobi leader. And then he’s left holding Enju’s body covered in blood that’s not his own, tear in one eye. Hearing the screams of lords and servants alike killing each other due to his poison. It’s poetic.

Hanzo - TFW You Go From Cold to Softie But Still End Up in a Double-Suicide Because You’re Girlfriend Didn’t Fully Learn Her Own Self-Worth

So Hanzo is what the kids call, a kuudere. He’s also the oldest, being the same age as Enju’s mom. Enju is 16-17. I am uncomfortable. To be fair Goemon is also around Hanzo’s age, but Goemon doesn’t act as a tutor/guardian in the way Hanzo does, so its less noticeable. Also...he gets real saucy in the last chapter. Saucier than the so-called libertine. Went from 0 to 100 real fast. There are some parts I really love about this route, but given Hanzo’s role and age-gap I feel like this is one of those ones where I wish they left out the romance altogether, but hey this wouldn’t be an otome game without the smooching, so eh.

How to Get the Bad End

Be pessimistic, hesitant, self-defeating, make silly mistakes. Hanzo wants Enju to be smart and willing to improve her skills. This entire route is really about Enju’s growth, both mental and physical, in the face of overbearing odds. So don’t do that and you’ll end up in the bad end. There’s a loooong gap between your last choice and where the bad end hits, and in the last chapter you don’t get any more choices.

What happens.

When Hanzo seemingly disobeys his lord’s order to kill Enju (at least, that’s what the messenger said) he planned to commit suicide. In the good ending Enju stops him and they move on to smooches but in the bad ending...she kills him herself so that he wouldn’t have to do it. Then she ends her life soon after.

Review

I was honestly wasn’t expected this flavor of death from this route, but I suppose its attached to the antithesis of the route. Hanzo, first from orders and then from heart, needed Enju to live and demanded Enju to stay alive, but in the bad end she was able to kill her own lover but didn’t learn to stay alive for herself. It’s sad, but its a little too short for me to really sink in the tragedy. Now if you want tragedy for the entire route, well that’s what our next boy’s for.

Chojiro - This Whole Route is a Bad Ending That the Real Bad End is Almost Cathartic

Chojiro is...*long, drawn out sigh* Enju’s cousin and mentor, whom she calls “Brother Chojiro.” Look there’s a lot of tropes common in otome games that I just can’t get behind, but here I am still playing them. Anyway sliding that fact back under the carpet Chojiro is another seemingly cold-hearted man, but unlike Hanzo, Chojiro already has a developed bond with Enju, and that bond makes it obvious that Chojiro’s got the fuzzies deep down. Unfortunately a lot depends on him being a shinobi who follows the rules and orders to a T, which is awkward when yer girl becomes a fugitive after being accused of murder and you’re sent to kill her. Again, there’s parts of this route I really like if they didn’t bother with the romance. The thing under the carpet aside I feel like there was already an established love between the two from the get go, so to have them smooch, especially after all their friends died, is a little bit...bad timing is all I’m saying. Now the bad ending, well, that just fits right in.

How to Get the Bad End

A good chunk of the choices made are without Chojiro present at all, but if you pick the right choice you’ll still see the flowers. A main theme I suppose would be to get the bad end Enju emulates Chojiro. Try to be cool and calm. It’s not real, but its how Enju sees Chojiro. Think of what Chojiro would do, rather than what Enju truly feels. That’s just a loose thread though. The path to the bad end comes mainly from how the plot of the route happens, which is Enju asking if living is really worth...all this?

What Happens

So uh, that ruler Enju was accused of murdering? Yeah he never died. The double was killed. In this route at least, he set it up so that the Five Elders would play a game to see who would become the guardian. Each of Enju’s friends, tricked into hunting down Enju at risk of losing their entire village, represented one of the five lords. But then, in the ruler’s viewpoint, Enju managed to kill four of her friends (actually they mostly killed each other...it was actually three of them who died) and was so impressed...that he decided to bring her and Chojiro to the castle to set up a death match. Enju’s blood is boiling. Chojiro’s blood is boiling. My blood is boiling.

So what are we gonna do? Go down in style. Enju decides that if they both can’t live in peace, then they shouldn’t have to live while the other dies either. She convinces Chojiro, who’s revealed to be as soft as Chojiro always told her she was, to strike her as she strikes him. They die in each other’s arms with smiles on their faces.

Review

While the choices don’t really connect outside of whether they’re good for Enju or not, the Bad End fits like a glass slipper on this horrific tragedy. It’s poignant that its Enju who takes the lead in how they go out, when its always been Chojiro who had to be in charge. At the end it was like Chojiro was holding Enju’s sleeve. Sad and beautiful...and closed off from the opportunity to escape that was so close.

Kuroyuki - Kuroyuki is a Tragedy with a Neat Scarf and Losing Enju Did Not Help

Kuroyuki was raised alongside Enju and is, FOR ONCE, around the same age as Enju. At age 8 he was sent out on a mission and only returns now to tag along with Enju and her friends during their mission. He’s aloof and playful, but its pretty clear he gots some secrets, and has some feelings for Enju from the beginning. Once you get into Kuroyuki’s route he doesn’t hide that fact, up and saying that he loves Enju early on in his route. He can act very forward (forward enough to make me act like a PTA mom and evoke the three-feet-apart rule), but when he realizes Enju’s upset he’ll quickly apologize and make pouty faces. Despite the fact that he can be a cold-blooded killer (like all the boys except Goemon can be) and also be the most calculating, he can also be a sweetie, and it feels like he and Enju are on a more even playing field than the other boys. Kuroyuki and Enju can be pretty childish toward each other, and it can get pretty cute. That won’t stop the plotwist, and this bad end, coming fast to snap your heart in two.

How to Get the Bad End

Okay also Kuroyuki’s a yandere. Probably should have said that sooner. Anytime you’re in a yandere route the choices that lead you to the good end are basically to be sensible, because your yandere pal sure won’t. Its the same here, though its good to show some care. So get to the bad end...don’t be sensible. Be reckless. He’s says they’d live together and die together. That’s not worrying at all! What if I want to be with the yandere who gaslit me, mom!? Ever thought about that!?

What Happens

So in this route, the ruler was killed for realzies this time...by Kuroyuki. He was probably killed by Kuroyuki in every route except in Chojiro’s and Gekkamaru’s, because when he kills the ruler there’s no blood or open gash, which is a mark of his type of power. There was a deal between the Kaga Clan (who Kuroyuki was sent to train in 8 years ago) and the Koga Clan to kill the ruler, bringing the country back into war. There’s no use for shinobi in times of peace. What Kuroyuki wasn’t planning was for Enju to be accused of the murder. So uh...he basically sets it up so that he’d be the only one to save her from prison and travel with her. He lied about her friends possibly coming after her, which even I was set to believe because I was in a couple of routes where they did come after her, which was clever. He was spot on about Enju’s father disowning her though, even if he didn’t know it when he told her, which goes to show how much of an ass her dad is.

I need to set this all up to say after all this is revealed Kuroyuki decides that if he can’t be with her, he’ll at least make a better world for her, first by killing her ass of a dad (which, like, same.) Coincidentally Enju, determined to find out who ordered Kuroyuki to kill the ruler to save Kuroyuki, decides to confront her dad on the matter as well. So they both meet again while facing off her dad. Enju wants to live and die with Kuroyuki, and in her reckless rush to protect Kuroyuki her dad stabs her. Kuroyuki kills her dad (good) then carries Enju to a clear field. He gives Enju the only thing he can give her at that point - a happy dream that everything turned out alright, and that he and all her friends are together and happy. Enju dies peacefully in his arms. He promises to join her soon.

Review

I feel like I’m going to say this every time we meet a yandere, but while I like seeing yanderes as obstacles, I don’t believe in good endings with yanderes, at least romantically. Like if a boy can only see happiness by keeping one girl by his side with rope and a red eye that freezes your shadow so you can’t move, maybe he should, at the very least, try to connect with people other than her? Like, maaaaaaybe take a break from each other, clear your mind? No? Enju wants to be with you forever now too? Tch.

That being said, I’m glad this was the bad end for this route, and not a yandere ending where Kuroyuki kills Enju or Enju gets trapped in an illusion so that she couldn’t escape or something. Much as I like “WTF” bad endings this bad ending struck a chord in how...sad it is. Hands down, this one made me cry for Enju and Kuroyuki. Much as Kuroyuki’s got issues, he gave Enju a way to pass peacefully. It hurt me when she closed her eyes, and it hurt me when Kuroyuki cried.

Gekkamaru - The Overprotective Childhood Friend to End All Overprotective Childhood Friends

Gekkamaru is Enju’s childhood friends and bodyguard, and is overprotective to a...concerning degree. No matter which route you’re in he’ll come to Enju’s aid, ranging from “well that’s sweet” to “oh gawd Gekka pls calm tf down.” So you can imagine how he acts in his own route. Despite the over-protectiveness (though I suppose when you become a wanted criminal over-protectiveness is a welcome trait) Gakkamaru is probably the Best Boy of the whole game. He’s earnest and a real sweetheart. Its too bad that this route is about as tragic as Chojiro’s, except the tragedy happens gradually, over and over again, not to mention his bad end...

How to Get The Bad End

So that whole servant-and-master thing? Yeah it’s fine. Gekkamaru wants to act as a servant towards Enju? Eh, don’t worry about it. Pick options that don’t rock the boat on their relationship. Don’t pay attention to Gekkamaru’s growing feelings, it’s fine. It’s fine! Not like he’ll die or anything.

What Happens

So he dies. Turns out Gekkamaru’s been hypnotized not once, but twice! Enju’s mother hypnotized him into protecting Enju at all costs, and his mother hypnotized him into want to kill Enju, due to her father killing his parents before she was born. Enju was tricked into releasing Gekka from her mother’s spell, leaving him with the curse forcing him to attempt to Enju. Before he could do the deed, Enju tell him she loves him. Rather than her love breaking the curse, Gekka’s role as her servant and bodyguard wins over, and he stabs himself fatally. Enju follows after him.

Review

This ending isn’t far off from what actually happens in the good ending, but it mattered how Gekkamaru broke the curse. What killed him was his duty trumping both the curse AND his love. It’s what Enju feared - that his devotion was only due to the spell, and that it would kill him. It’s poetic, but given the roller coaster of tragedy that’s happened throughout the route it feels like just another addition to it.

Conclusion

If I were to rank these bad endings from least interesting to most interesting, I’d say Hanzo - Gekkamaru - Chojiro - Kuroyuki - Goemon. Obviously if you’re looking at good ending ranking or best boy the ranking would be different, but that’s not what we’re here for! This is BadEndVille babey! Chojiro, Kuroyuki and Goemon are a bit of a toss-up, since all three of those bad endings match the character and evoke a unique sort of pain. Hanzo and Gekkamaru’s endings are also sad, but I don’t think they’re as strong a finish as the others. Chojiro, Kuroyuki and Goemon’s bad endings feel like a real conclusion to a tragedy, while Hanzo and Gekkamaru’s bad endings feel like a “whoopsie you killed yer boy from the top!”

Still, all the bad endings are fitting for how they occur: Enju and Her Love learned the wrong lessons. Enju constantly has to face being hunted down by shinobi stronger than her, being abandoned by the village who treasured her and the father who never acknowledged her, and sometimes she has to face her own childhood friends. But on the way she’s often with someone who loves her, who’s willing to carry her through. What she needs isn’t just strength and willpower, its the desire to live. Live even when it feels like it’d be easier for everyone if you were gone, because your life is not for others to use up and wilt.

And in the bad end, Enju fails to learn that lesson. She dies because she can’t see happiness in living, not without the person who loved her by her side, and doesn’t realize that there is a way out, that they can both be saved. With Kuroyuki, they both agreed that they will live together and they will die together, and in every bad end Enju decided that dying together was the better option.

It’s the same for the boys: Goemon fails to keep his beliefs after Enju dies, Hanzo fails to save Enju because he couldn’t change his beliefs as a shinobi, Chojiro fails because he’s so certain that everything he loves with eventually wilt, Kuroyuki fails because he realizes the consequences of what he’s done too little too late, and Gekkamaru fails because he couldn’t truly see himself as anything other than a loyal servant, ready to die even if that dooms the one he serves to misery. They all became Romeos and Juliets, too short-sighted to see the light beyond the horizon.

All this to say that if you have the time after completing the good endings for all the boys, grab some ice cream or any other sweet treat that suits you and go through these bad endings. Let those sad feels wash over you for a bit. Then get to those bonus stories in the extras because I THOUGHT I WAS DONE-

#a road paved with bad endings #nightshade otome #nightshade #otome game

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nowhereiswhereibelong · 4 years

Text

73 Questions

I mas tagged by: @mrs-machinegun-norris about two centuries ago sorry

On a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now?

• 5

Describe yourself in a hashtag?

• #sadbicht

• Cause I'm a bad bicht you can't kill me, only I do that

If you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be?

• Aaron Taylor-Johnson

• Colson Backer

If your life was a musical, what would the marquee say?

• The crazy bisexual is on the loose

What’s one thing people don’t know about you?

• That I cant handle silence

What’s your wake up ritual?

• All my cats and family yells at me till I roll of take my meds and stare at the wall till I'm late

What’s your go to bed ritual?

• Make sure I cleaned the litter box and that my cats have food and water then is up to bed and reading anything and everything till I fall a sleep

What’s your favourite time of day?

• Night time (I get the zoomies), or when I'm home alone

Your go to for having a good laugh?

• I really like comedy and some that make me laugh even when I watched 1000 times: John Mulaney, Daniel Sloss, Russel Howard and Sarah Millican

Dream country to visit?

• As many as I can! I have an extensive list

What’s the biggest surprise you’ve had?

• Last semester 3 professors at university were really supportive and understanding and I didnt expect them to be so kind or belive in me that much.

Heels or flats/sneakers?

• Sneakers everywhere all the time for any given reason

Vintage or new?

• Vintage bits and pisses of different eras but late 80s early 90s give me live

• And I'm obsessed with 70s buildings dont know why

Who do you want to write your obituary?

• An creative stranger - go nuts dude freak people out

Style icon?

• dont have one I guess

What are three things you can’t live without?

• My cats

• My phone

• My guitar

What’s one ingredient you put in everything?

• I'm crazy about mustard

• My dad always says anything salivary can be better with cheese and anything sweet be better with chocolate - not that far from the truth

What 3 people living or dead would you like to make dinner for?

• Elvis Presley

• Jane Fonda

• Janis Joplin

What’s your biggest fear in life?

• Failure

• The dark

Window or aisle seat?

• Window: you can look at the view, it's better for sleeping and during the day sunlight for reading

What’s your current TV obsession?

• A have many, it's a problem, but right now mind hunter

Favourite app?

• Instagram and tumblr

Secret talent?

• I like to lie to myself and say acting but maybe just weirdly good at pretending to be good at things (ain't that the joke huh)

Most adventurous thing you’ve done in your life?

• I would say it was dumb, stupid and streamly dangerous but when I was 16 a friend and I went to some guys house in a very weird neighborhood and lied to our parents about it and only 1 other friend new (also our taxi couldn't find the house). We meet those two guys at a friends party and they said that they were throwing one and that we should go, and our dumb selfdestruting alcohol hunting minds though, why not. It was not a party. It was just a hang out with us and one other guy and to this day I dont know how we left at 7am (the only way to get out of there was the first bus because uber wasn't a thing yet and me and my friend were to scared of what kind taxi driver we would find) unharmed and not sexually harassed, given that one of the dudes that our friends new more hated me for a few months for not putting out for him, cause you know, men.

• I'm absolutely sure they wanted a sex party that didnt happen. But I did show my unasked skills of knowing every single black veil brides lyrics.

How would you define yourself in three words?

• Anxious

• Laud

• Loyal

Favourite piece of clothing you own?

• The stolen 80s tshirts from my dad

• High waisted shorts

Must have clothing item everyone should have?

• A comfortable pair of jean shorts that you feel pretty in

Superpower you would want?

• To stop time

• I get to anxious trying to time manage and it just snowballs from there. And sleeping in without being always late.

What’s inspiring you in life right now?

• Machine Gun Kelly (I stared listening to his stuff a few months ago)

• But always and forever is the passion that moves people

Best piece of advice you’ve received?

• Be/do to other people what you wanted to be done for you

Best advice you’d give your teenage self?

• It's not just on your head it's a real thing, you're lot alone, and it ok to need help.

A book that everyone should read?

• Harry Potter: that even thou I have read multiple times it still is amazing and full of symbolism that people brush through some times.

• Women who run with the wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estés

• My older sister made me start this book and its absolutely live changing and I belive should be obligatory to all women in this world. This book is a live long work by this psychologist and through miths, legends, folk tales and stories she puts together what she calls the wild women archetype and what is the feminine instinct is and how those tales teach us about it and how to have a healthy relationship with her.

What would you like to be remembered for?

• For being kind

How do you define beauty?

• It's an powerfull force within

What do you ~love most~ only love about your body?

• The shape of my eyes

Best way to take a rest/decompress?

• Listening to music and dancing around

Favourite place to view art?

• I dont understand sorry

If your life were a song, what would the title be?

• Static supernova

If you could master one instrument, what would it be?

• Guitar and piano cant choose only one

If you had a tattoo, where would it be?

• My planned ones:

• Orca

• Felix felicis

• Tree

• Mother earth

• Penicillin allergy (I dont trust nobody)

Dolphins or koalas?

• Dolphins

• Did you y'all know that orcas not only aren't whales but belong on the same family as dolphins?

What’s your spirit animal?

• Orca

Best gift you’ve ever received?

• My cats (even thou there are rescues they're my little special gifts from nature)

Best gift you’ve ever given?

• On my best friend wedding my friend and I gave a performance as siluetes (it was private beach and all the light were off and we had the car headlights behind us) I played the song you are in love by taylor swift while she did an beautiful performance on silks the song represented their relationship and how she shared it if us in a very sacred way and the silks was a representation of her herself and how the 3 of us saw in the last few years her transformation from a very broken person to the women she was born to be.

• Yes we were crying the hole time but was the most genuine and beautiful think I ever done so yeah

What’s your favourite board game?

• Dix it, its awesome go play it pls

What’s your favourite colour?

• Petrol blue

Least favourite colour?

• The color of lentil soup my mom makes it looks like a baby have serious digestive problems

Diamonds or pearls?

• Diamonds of the symbolic value of "the pressure that could've break us made us into diamonds insted"

Drugstore makeup or designer?

• Drugstore makeup, the one I know that are real brands hauahauahs

Blow-dry or air-dry?

• Air-dry

Pilates or yoga?

• Pilates even thou I must prefer sports mostly

Coffee or tea?

• My blood is coffee at this point

What’s the weirdest word in the English language?

• Wolrd, because English is not my first language and specially in an American accent the pronunciation of wolrd if simply the worst and is absolutely obnoxious and unsettling.

Dark chocolate or milk chocolate?

• Dark

• But my absolut favored is a 70% cacao white chocolate. It's incredible but I only got to buy it twice :(

Stairs or elevator?

• Stairs, I also love to sit on them

Summer or winter?

• Winter. I only like heat if I'm inside very cold water

You are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat?

• If nutrition value doesn't matter, ice cream

A desert you don’t like?

• Orange cake. Bad memories and I vomit every time I try to eat it.

A skill you’re working on mastering?

• Singing and playing the guitar

Best thing to happen to you today?

• I think I made a online friend :D

Best compliment you’ve ever received?

• That I'm kind

Favourite smell?

• Buttering sugar

Hugs or kisses?

• Hugs i Iike to be permanently attached to some people at times

If you made a documentary, what would it be about?

• Domestic violence

• Parenting

Last piece of content you consumed that made you cry?

• Today I was trying to play this song called Ronan and cryed my eyes out like all the other times I tried before It's a song of child cancer in the mother's perspective

Lipstick or lip gloss?

• Lipstick

• I'm a red matte lip stan

Sweet or savoury?

• Sweet

Girl crush?

• Billie Elish

How you know you’re in love?

• The only time I think I've been in love I only realised it because they left and I didnt understand why i was severely hurt by it and changed the way I created all relationships after that. And then it hit me

• So pain and heartache.... yeah that's depressing as shit

Song you can listen to on repeat?

• When the sun goes down - Arctic Monkeys

If you could switch lives with someone for a day who would it be?

• My own self but not a anxious depressed mess just to feel what it's like

What are you most excited about at this time in your life?

• That I dont need to make decisions

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thesinglesjukebox · 5 years

Video

youtube

ORVILLE PECK - TURN TO HATE

[6.18]

Next up, a masked singer who presumably won't turn out to be, I don't know, Ninja...

Alex Clifton: "Fringed masked queer cowboy with Elvis's voice and an '80s melodic sense with a dash of Twin Peaks" sounds like a shtick when phrased that way, I'll admit. But to dismiss Orville Peck as some kind of novelty star really ignores how good he is. There's something about the way he mixes everything together that's hypnotic and keeps me coming back for more. That voice, for one -- every time I hear it, I'm blown away that someone can just make that come out of their mouth, especially since it's been a long time since I've heard a male voice this rich. I tried not to be impressed the first time I watched his videos as there was an element that felt too campy for words, like it would all be revealed to be a joke at the end. But to be fair, you can't make this kind of music and not have some sort of campiness. Peck is the real deal; if anyone deserves more attention and has been overlooked by the general masses, it's this guy. [8]

Joshua Copperman: It's an effective gimmick; the narrative is less "hardcore guy goes country" than "mysterious pale masked man inexplicably has a gorgeous baritone." Pony's missteps recreate Morrissey/Elvis/Roy Orbison too neatly, but the best moments use pastiche as a foundation to build a new voice. The pinnacle is "Turn to Hate," which is closer to '80s-new wave than '50s rockabilly and benefits from that distinction. Its message jumps the song forward another thirty years; "Don't let my sorrow turn to hate" is especially powerful in this age of radicalization. The line "you're just another boy caught in the rye" is maybe my favorite lyric of the year; reassuring the wannabe Holden Caulfields of the world they'll be "alriiiiiight." The "yee-haw" is up there with "get 'em" and "*GASP*" in the very specific pantheon of infectious 2019 ad-libs. He can be as goofy as he wants (and get away with "You'll all be stars, now just you wait") because of the depth of feeling and urgency in this song. And anyway, why be Holden Caufield when you can be a chaotic cowboy that channels his loneliness into helping others instead of wallowing? [9]

Iain Mew: Peck sings as if having a deep voice is an automatic granter of a resonance which never arrives. The low-stakes jangle works well enough until he completely takes over, but I get easily distracted by imagining what Michael Stipe could do with the same material. [4]

Katherine St Asaph: The sum total of my knowledge about Orville Peck: 1) he's a deliberately anonymous ersatz-country artist, 2) always appears in a The Hitcher mask, 3) is signed to Sub Pop. Is the latter why I keep swearing this is about to turn into a Throwing Muses song? [7]

Nortey Dowuona: A soft shading of guitars sets the stage for Orville Peck to pull in the warm, fuzzy bass, gale wind guitars and 3D printed drums around their prickly, hurtling croon. [6]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: Bar music you listen to while sipping an IPA and eating salted peanuts. Pleasant, well-executed, inessential. [5]

Alfred Soto: A flashback to the Poppy Bush Interzone of college radio when Nick Cave and Lower Manhattan-era Lloyd Cole garnered airplay on little more than the symbolic portent of their two-dimensional baritones. Cool guitar twang. Not queer enough in toto. [5]

Vikram Joseph: I guess I was expecting something self-consciously challenging, but for all the masked theatrics, "Turn To Hate" is a remarkably comfortable-sounding country-pop song with beautiful, crisp production. There's more than a trace of Reckoning-era R.E.M. in the rich jangle of the guitars -- especially the three-note lick leading into the chorus -- and the hazy outro is eerily reminiscent of another hazy 2019 outro, but Orville Peck contrives to sound both classic and sharply idiosyncratic. Also, if there were a prize for the most deliciously understated "yeehaw" of the decade, this would walk it. [7]

Kylo Nocom: Here comes the cowboy! And he sounds a lot like an unfunny version of the Magnetic Fields! Mac DeMarco's appearance in the video is unsurprising; both artists have summoned audiences through extra-musical goofiness more so than their rather pedestrian tunes. The antics make for easier branding and a fine token country slot come year-end list season. They do not make for fine music. One wonders why all the BDSM imagery is here when Orville has such a gutless, clean-shaven aesthetic. [4]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: It's so easy to read Orville Peck's act as just about the mask (just about the mask, as if that doesn't mean the mask as metaphor / the mask as literal mask / the mask as affectation / the mask as prop-work / the mask as pageantry / the mask as marketing gimmick) that I at first did not want to even encounter his music. Wouldn't the idea of a masked cowboy goth indie folk singer always outstrip the practice? Yet "Turn to Hate" works both as a part of the Peckian mythos and as a work of Springsteen-cribbing Americana. It's a simple song, raving up the same changes until they become laden with meaning, but it's effective, like the high-beams on an old Toyota cutting through a Southwestern night. It's kitschy in a way that only furthers its immediacy, a masked song about the mask's necessity that nevertheless opens its own beating heart up. [8]

Oliver Maier: Many musicians have flirted with or fully adopted the cowboy mantle in the past couple of years, but Peck is one of the few for whom the campiness of the persona feels planned rather than arrived at. This permeates the music to an extent, though I'm not sure whether it's intentional. For all their theatricality, Peck's vocals lack presence and conviction on "Turn to Hate," and I can't decide whether it's a cunning way of draining the gruffness out of the archetype or just a genuine weakness. Maybe I'd be more inclined towards the former if anything else about the song felt particularly sophisticated, but while there's glimmers of Big Star's motel melancholy, it's still not much more than a placid alt-country head-nodder. [5]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

#Orville Peck #country #pop #music #music review #Amnesty Week

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ariadenassau · 5 years

Text

AMERICANA TASK 001

LAYER ONE : THE OUTSIDE (OOC)

name: Ariadne Marie de Nassau

meaning of name: Ariadne is a Greek name, meaning “chaste” or “most holy”. Marie is a French version of Mary, and the meaning is debated, but can mean “sea of sorrow” or “rebellion”. Her last name, de Nassau, is literally “of Nassau” — she is a part of the House of Nassau.

aliases: Aria is her nickname from childhood and her preferred name.

place of birth: Brigham and Women’s Hospital in Boston, Massachusetts.

race: Caucasian

nationality: Dual citizenship with France and the United States.

gender: Cis-female

sexuality: Mostly heterosexual

profession: A freelance journalist

eye color: Dark brown

hair style/color: Straight, chestnut brown hair to her shoulders, usually partly braided or in a plait.

height: 5’4” (164 cm)

clothing style: Simple, tailored, and clean-cut, Aria dresses in neutrals and soft materials. She's partial to creamy ivories and tans as opposed to bright colors, with the occasional baby pinks. The only jewelry she wears is a simple gold pendant and a sapphire ring, her birthstone.

best physical feature: Her eyes — both soft and piercing at the same time, the eyes are truly the window to Aria’s soul.

appearance: Very soft and muted, yet luxurious. Aria is from wealth, which shows, but she never flaunts it. She doesn’t wear much makeup and avoids showing too much skin. She looks professional and pretty, but not someone you’d turn around and look at twice in New York.

weight: 110 lbs (50 kg)

complexion: Fair during the winter, slightly tanner during the summer, as Aria darkens easily under the sun.

build: Slight and petite, she is quite skinny and small, without very many curves.

voice: Gentle, she rarely speaks over a shout. She doesn’t like to yell and upturns the ends of her sentences, as if she’s always a bit unsure of herself. She has a slight British/European accent from her upbringing abroad.

LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE (OOC)

fears: Spiders, roller-coasters, and disappointing her parents — although she is working on that last one,

guilty pleasure: The Bachelor. Aria will never admit to watching them, as she finds the entire idea trashy and degrading, but somehow, she turns it on every week when its airing with popcorn and a glass of wine.

biggest pet peeve: People who chew on their food loudly (bad table manners in general, really.)

ambition for the future: To find out who was behind Abby’s killing and write an entire expose on it.

one bad habit: Popping her pimples and skin blemishes.

one good habit: Washing the dishes immediately after she uses them.

one habit they can’t break: Her daily iced coffee (or two) from Starbucks.

one they’ve broken: Chewing on her nails.

LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS (OOC)

first thoughts waking up: “I need coffee.”

what they think about the most: Deep-set anxieties about her future and identity as an individual person.

what they think about before bed: All the errands and things she needs to accomplish tomorrow.

what they think their best quality is: Intelligence and writing ability.

what they think would completely break them: Finding love, and then losing it.

what they think was the best thing in their life: Discovering that she had a long-lost sister, and getting to reconnect with her.

what they think was the worst thing in their life: Losing that long-lost sister.

what seemingly insignificant memories stuck with them: Her childhood piano teacher smacking her fingers when she’d play the wrong notes.

LAYER FOUR: WHAT’S BETTER? (OOC)

single or group dates: Neither — Aria hates dates.

to be loved or respected: Respected.

beauty or brains: Brains.

dogs or cats: Dogs.

coffee or tea: Coffee.

showering in the day or night: Showering at night.

taking baths or taking showers: Taking showers.

tv or movies: Movies.

writing or reading: Writing.

platonic or romantic love: Platonic.

iced tea or lemonade: Iced tea.

ice cream or smoothies: Smoothies.

cupcakes or cake: Cupcakes.

beach or mountains: Mountains.

LAYER FIVE: DO YOU? (IC)

lie: “Yes — it’s a way to get information that I want out of people. But I never lie to hurt anyone.”

believe in yourself: “I hope that I do. I think that I do. Maybe not.”

believe in love: “I think love is out there, but I don’t know how to find it or if it even exists for me.”

want someone: “Maybe.”

work so that you can support your hobbies or use your hobbies as a way of filling up the time you aren’t working: “Well — neither. Writing is both my work and my hobby. So I guess I lucked out.”

have something you’re reluctant to tell people: “My ‘royal’ status. It doesn’t mean anything.”

have an opinion about sex: “It’s something lovely that can make two people’s bonds stronger, but... I don’t know. I don’t think I have a strong opinion either way.”

have many friends: “I have many acquaintances from work and school, but close friends? Probably not.”

have as many friends as you want: “Yes. I’m a bit of a loner, you see.”

have something to make a scene in public about: “God, I hope not.”

have something to give your life for: “A hundred percent — my career, my writing, and figuring out what the hell happened to Abby.”

have major flaws: “I… get too attached to people. It goes along with having such little close friends. The friends I do have, I keep very close to my heart, which means when I lose them… well, my world falls apart.”

have something you pretend or try to care about: “Um — politics?”

have an image you project: “I think I try to come off as more self-confident than I am. I’m also very polite to most people, even if I don’t particularly think the person is deserving of it.”

have something you’re afraid of: “Isn’t everyone afraid of something?”

think you’re polite or rude: “Definitely polite.”

LAYER SIX: FAVORITES (IC)

favorite color: “Hm. I love baby pink, but I also love cream and ivory as well.”

favorite animal: “Polar bears. They’re so majestic!”

favorite movie: “Lost in Translation. It was such a beautifully shot movie!”

favorite game: “I don’t play very many games.”

sound: “Oh! — the sound of sunny winter mornings back when I was in school in Gstaad. You can hear it when you open a window; the chilly breeze, the sound of snow underneath people’s feet… I miss it.”

song: “It changes, really, but I can always listen to anything by Frank Sinatra.”

band: “Is it cliche if I say The Beatles?”

outfit: “Well, it certainly depends on the season, but for the fall and winter, I love my tan crepe pants, an ivory cashmere turtleneck, and my Acne leather boots.”

place: “Switzerland. I spent most of my years there, and the landscapes are so beautiful.”

memory: “I think the first time I met Abby — I was so nervous, and I just saw her, and we talked for hours in her room afterwards. Her parents made hot cocoa, and we just sat there, laughing, crying… it was so wonderful, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”

person: “Abby. Or my mentor back at Harvard. She was the one who helped me curate my writing to what it is now.”

show: “I don’t watch much television.”

LAYER SEVEN: AGE (OOC/IC)

age: 29

date of birth: September 2nd, 1990

day your next birthday will be: Thursday.

zodiac sign: Virgo.

age you lost your virginity: 18.

does age matter: “Age certainly matters if you’re younger, but once you pass twenty-five or so… who am I to judge?”

LAYER EIGHT: PERSONALITY (OOC)

moral alignment: Neutral Good.

enneagram: 4 - The Individualist

four temperaments: Melancholic

tropes: the soiled dove, the lost soul, the contrite, the taciturn

archetypes: The Sage/Innocent

tarot cards: Temperance

compassion: yes.

empathy: yes.

creativity: yes.

mental flexibility: at times, no.

passion: yes, for the right things.

stamina: yes.

physical strength: not much.

battle skill: not at all.

agility: a bit.

strategy: she’s always planning for her next move, so yes.

teamwork: yes, but she needs to be the leader.

strength: so much emotional strength.

intelligence: yes.

wisdom: partly, but still trying to find it.

dexterity: none; Aria has a rare muscular dystrophy that degraded the muscles in her hands and fingers.

constitution: a hundred percent.

charisma: only on certain occasions; otherwise, Aria is quite aloof.

LAYER NINE: FINISH THE SENTENCE (IC)

i love: “... good food. Can you blame me?”

i feel: “... lost.”

i hide: “... my feelings, my emotions, my thoughts.”

i miss: “... Abby.”

i wish: “... that I could know where life is taking me.”

i hate: “... people who think they can take advantage of my kindness.”

LAYER TEN: FAMILY (IC)

relationships: “I had a boyfriend. It’s awkward to talk about really, but he dumped me. Quite an awkward situation.”

parents: “My father is Prince Jean Louis, sixteenth in line for the throne in Luxembourg. My mother is Princess Charlotte Julie, formerly Charlotte Julie Vanderbilt.”

siblings: “Just Abby, who was fathered by my father and another woman. She was given up for adoption when she was a baby, which is why I never met her until I grew up.”

children: “No — although, maybe in the future.”

favorite childhood memory: “Oh — my childhood wasn’t that fun. But I guess, early on, my parents did take me out on trips on the boat in lakes in the South of France. Those were always nice.”

favorite childhood toy: “My stuffed bunny Juliette. I still have her.”

embarrassing story: “I fell asleep once in a bowl of yogurt in class. I was so tired staying up studying for an exam, that during it, I was eating my breakfast, and just… fell asleep.”

favorite family member: “Abby. I’m not very close to my parents, or anyone from my family, really.”

#americanatask001 #( there are things no one knows but she keeps them close to her heart | about. )

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sebcastellanos · 5 years

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what's your favorite Jeff scene? what's your favorite Abed scene? and what's you're favorite Jeff x Abed scene? :)

I'M FINALLY HERE... we'll pretend i'm not in the middle of review classes for my board exams 🙃

my favourite jeff scene/s (because GOD it's hard to choose) are high toss-ups between his conversation with his dad on thanksgiving and his graduation speech

the former is the first explicit mention by jeff himself, i think, of his vulnerability/mental damage, and while he's brought up going to therapy before i think the depths of his scars are only properly touched at that point? jeff also has this tendency to pretend he doesn't feel things, or isn't affected by them, so that scene absolutely obliterates me, especially since he makes an effort to go back to william after he initially runs away from thanksgiving dinner. jeff always runs away from these things that break him, but not this time!

as for the graduation speech, i figure that's self-explanatory. but in the same way talking to his dad highlighted the parts of him that're broken, his speech was a nice way to show how much his involvement with the study group changed him into a person capable of love and caring. and sure enough in season 5 and beyond we see jeff willing-- WANTING-- to engage in affection. he's not always wanting it, sure, but he asks for group hugs and he cares about his friends openly and the graduation speech was just a nice way to metaphorically open that door towards a more openly feeling jeffrey

as for abed, it's hard to top the first short film he made for his father? that and the conversation when it came out his mum couldn't visit him for christmas and it had him desperately searching for "the meaning of christmas" after. i also really liked his bonding with buzz over his duck comics, but there were probably better ways to write abed in that episode, generally

it's just good to remember that abed is human. he's not a robot and he's not a tool for fourth wall-breaking, though the latter is certainly an aspect of his writing. the film about his family life was super eye-opening, and abed doesn't communicate his emotions well either, so i liked that he found a way to do it. that being said the importance of film to him makes the recycled cinema episode really interesting-- and meaningful, when abed realises he CAN'T control every aspect of his life, no matter how much he wishes he could. beyond the fact he can't control his film, in his talk with jeff he illustrates he can't confine things to the staples we see in character archetypes and plot tropes, he can't plan everything. and neither can jeff

SO. favourite jeff/abed scene?? that bit in the frisbees is one, because not only do we get jeff's vulnerability, but we also get a very obvious show of how these two are two sides of the same fucking coin. and there is something in the way jeff pulls abed in his arms and abed is left there, held by him, eyes wide because he hadn't seen it coming (except jeff has hugged him before, and abed is even the first person jeff ever hugs in the entire fucking series), because as much as he's trying to illustrate to jeff why things are going to be ok, he also needed some comfort himself. his film turned out awesome, that's true, but it hadn't been an easy thing for him to go through, and jeff was there to hold him

it's SO hard to pick a single favourite scene for them. like i love when jeff becomes abed's roommate and just finds satisfaction in having nothing, and he's so comfortable living in that dorm eating cereal and watching TV that he opens up to abed about his shit dad, and abed loves having him around but believes jeff is destined for greatness that he can't achieve as his roommate because he'll drag him down. it breaks my heart? and it breaks my heart when abed, who for all his life was surrounded by people who wanted him to be someone different, is told by jeff that "i don't need you to grow or change"-- that he likes abed for who he is. and the fact jeff set up an entire party just for abed, just to make abed happy, and he's never done that for anyone else, is such a big thing!!

abed sees jeff for who he is and jeff knows this and that makes abed, in a way, "safe". in the same way jeff doesn't need abed to be different if he doesn't want to be, abed doesn't need jeff to be more than what he is, even if he hopes he becomes something better. consider the fact that when abed disappears into himself after it's revealed jeff is graduating early, it's his mind's version of jeff that gets him back to reality. consider that when jeff goes through the same thing, right after getting his diploma signed by the dean, it's his mind's version of abed that gets him back to reality. they're each other's anchors, in a way. and right in the pilot they do a whole full circle thing with either of them "seeing the other's value"-- a value that continues throughout the whole damn show

the best thing about jeff/abed is that they know and understand each other and they don't need to be attached at the hip for that to continue to be true. they're like the idea of a True Home; it's not something you necessarily have to return to everyday, but you CAN return, and the doors will always be open for you, and you'll feel safe

if you consider the fact abed never says a thing he doesn't mean, then his telling jeff that he has value is SO MUCH. if you consider the fact that abed reads jeff in a way noone else can, then jeff doesn't have to say anything for abed to know that he cares about him. (except, again, jeff holds him tight and close and it surprises abed not because he doesn't know jeff cares, but because jeff isn't always so fucking open and willing and ready to do that)

ANYWAY. i wish i could talk more about this but i'm mobile and this review class is starting to get intense. i hope you find these answers satisfactory 😭 i have so many feelings about my sons.......

#jeff x abed #jeffabed #anonymous #ask #long post /#SORRY FOR FILLING YOUR DASHES EVERYONE........#otp: i don't need you to grow or change

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xb-squaredx · 5 years

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Fire Emblem Three Houses Review: Shin Megami Sensei

The Fire Emblem series has been on an interesting journey in the past few years. Going into the development of Awakening, the series looked to be on its last legs, only for Awakening to catch on and result in the best sales in the series’ history to that point. While stumbling a bit with Fates and the release of Echoes flying under the radar, all eyes are on the franchise as they make their grand return to home consoles with Three Houses. If the sales data, reviews and word-of-mouth haven’t caught up to you yet, then let me be the first to tell you that Three Houses is an absolute smash hit for the franchise. Engrossing, packed with content, and not afraid to make some bold decisions, it’s an ambitious title that fans, new and old alike, shouldn’t pass up.

ACADEMIA OF THE THREE KINGDOMS

The premise for Three Houses is quite different from your typical franchise entry. Players take the role of Byleth, a young mercenary who is requested to become an instructor at Garreg Mach Academy. The Academy houses students from the three main governing bodies of the continent of Fodlan, and one of the first major decisions players will make is choosing which of the three houses to teach at, which results in many branching pathways after the beginning chapters unfold.

Right from the start, there’s intrigue. The game opens with a stylish, surprisingly bloody battle between two mythological figures, the Goddess Seiros and the King of Liberation, Nemesis, with Byleth’s connection to the two becoming more apparent as time goes on. The Church of Seiros has a tight grip on Garreg Mach, with the archbishop, Rhea, in particular setting her eyes on you. Amidst the schoolyard fun, there’s an undercurrent of rising tensions between the various countries and kingdoms under Fodlan, with certain figures working in the background on some truly gruesome things. While much of Three Houses is fairly lighthearted, when things get serious, it gets dark fast, but thankfully it’s done tastefully and rooted in complex character motivations and excellent world building. Depending on the route you choose, events unfold in different ways and different pieces of the puzzle become clear, though admittedly you’d be losing a lot of context gained from other routes. While each ending is, at least from what I’ve seen and heard, satisfactory, those that want the “whole story” have quite a bit of game to get through to see it all.

Of course, I personally don’t mind, as I find the narrative extremely interesting. Three Houses is packed with great bits of foreshadowing for many later-game events, the alternate routes give you tons of replay value, and in this game more than almost any other Fire Emblem game, the characters sell the experience. While not all are winners (at least in my book), just about every playable unit has more than meets the eye. Some characters come across as one-note: Raphael loves to eat and get sick gains, Annett is the cute, clumsy girl, Marianne is the shy wall-flower, and so on, but getting to know the students, and seeing how they interact with each other, often leads to some interesting surprises. Certain characters ended up winning me over after a few support conversations gave me a bit more insight into why they act the way they do, and some characters in particular have great chemistry with each other. Seteth comes across as a stern, overprotective brother at first glance, but he’s always there to help others and gives some pretty sound advice to anyone willing to hear it. Bernadetta might seem like the mopey shut-in that just needs to get out of her room more often, but it becomes clear her situation is a lot more complicated (and disturbing) than it seems. As in past games, you can have units raise their Support values to get to these heart-to-heart conversations, and while not every single character can Support with another, there’s enough overlap to help make these characters appear three-dimensional, and prove they’re more than the anime tropes and archetypes they seemingly embody.

A MASTERCLASS OF WAR

Fire Emblem has always been a series about decision-making, though Three Houses extends that past the battlefield, resulting in a very different structure for those used to the old games. Each chapter in the game is laid out on an in-game calendar, in a manner that can remind one of the Persona games. At the end of the month, the chapter’s main mission (or “lesson”) will take place, and it’s up to Byleth to make sure their students are prepared. During the week, Byleth teaches students in the art of warfare, helping them cultivate their skills and in some cases, have them reassess their goals. In past games, playable units had a fairly linear path. This one’s an Archer, and can become a Bow Knight or a Sniper, while this Cleric can choose to become a Mage if you wish, for instance. In Three Houses, however, players have almost total control over how their students grow and what they specialize in. While each student has their own strengths and weaknesses (Lysithea excels at magic rather than, say, melee combat, for one), it’s ultimately the player’s choice who fills what role. Students can focus on up to two skills in their own studies, occasionally asking their professor if they should switch goals and focus on other skills instead, resulting in some interesting customization. Characters can also have Budding Talent in certain fields, resulting in them excelling at classes they’d never do on their own. Hilda tries to player herself off as a fragile weakling, but she has the potential to be one of the best Knights in the game, with bulky armor that repels most attacks.

Class Changes work quite a bit differently here too: rather than strictly requiring an item to swap to a new class, students also need to pass Certification Exams to gain the right to use a certain class. Depending on the class, they might need to get weapon skills to a certain point, as well as reach a base level requirement. While I appreciate the customization in this system, being able to keep all my favorite characters in one group without becoming over centralized, I do take issue with the late-game Classes in this game. The Master Classes in this game feel a bit too homogenized, almost all requiring high-levels of skill in horse riding or flying, two skills that happen to be rather annoying to level up. Most characters wouldn’t normally bother with horses, but suddenly need them to complete their upgrade path, which just seems odd. Not to mention certain niches, like the Thief Class, being left out and effectively losing out on a final Class Change. A minor problem in the grand scheme, but it’s a bummer.

Outside of studying, Byleth uses Sundays as their free days. Here players can explore around the academy to chat with students and engage in a number of activities. Gardening, fishing, cooking, fighting tournaments and more. Most of these activities grant you some kind of usable item, or at the very least increase Support levels with students, so they’re well worth doing. You can also attend lectures if you want to squeeze in a bit more skill leveling, take a rest day and effectively skip ahead to the next week, or engage in battles. At times Paralogues, character-specific missions, and side missions can be tackled as well. While the game gives you plenty of options, keep in mind that you only have so much time in the day. Everything in-game has a limited amount of “points” attached to it, so you have to plan wisely. Lecture points for students, exploring points on free days, and battle points for…battles. On Normal Mode, however, there are some battles that can be repeated without any point penalty, effectively allowing for grinding for those that need it, though Hard and above lack it. Three Houses is a game all about options, and of course that’s before we even get to the battlefield!

SQUAD UP

When it comes time to battle, the experience has largely stayed the same as the older titles, though not without some refinements and a few new things thrown in for good measure. The game is still a grid-based, turn-based tactical game at its heart. Players move their units into position and move to take the enemy down, hopefully without any casualties along the way. While many traditional rules still exist here, such as arrows ripping right through flying units or magic wrecking bulky knights, the games iconic “weapon triangle” has largely been downplayed. Players can still earn skills in-game that more or less mimics the advantages you’d get in the old games though. Players who picked up Fire Emblem Echoes will surely notice a lot of that game’s mechanics also appearing here, albeit changed slightly. Weapon durability returns, for one, but now Combat Arts, special moves that cost players health in Echoes, now wear down weapons faster, and I personally like the change. There are a couple of neat additions and minor changes to certain unit types that I like too, like being able to dismount from your horse or flying creature once per turn, allowing players to greatly reduce the specific risks those units typically carry. Pair Up, introduced in Awakening, has been turned into the much-less-powerful Adjunct system, where you assign a character in reserve to another unit, where they will occasionally attack alongside your lead character, defend them from an attack, or heal them. They gain a small amount of EXP from this too, without being in danger of dying, which is neat. Though honestly, I barely noticed Adjuncts helping much throughout the game. Fates already rebalanced Pair Up, so I’m not sure why Three Houses felt the need to weaken it further.

The only out-and-out new mechanics in Three Houses are Battalions. Effectively a small army that is equipped to a given character, Battalions gives a slight boost to stats and also allows for the use of Gambits, special moves that players can only tend to use once or twice a battle. These range from large-scale magic attacks that hit multiple targets, healing or support spells that affect multiple allies, or powerful attacks localized to one enemy. Most of the time, a successful Gambit results in the target becoming “rattled,” unable to move or gain perks from their own Battalion for one turn. While it IS visually interesting to have these battles fought with actual armies as opposed to the dozen or so units seen in most games, Battalions don’t really add too much to the game and if they took them out in the next installment, I wouldn’t miss them much.

One feature that looks like it might become a series staple is the ability to turn back time to undo mistakes. In Echoes it was “Mila’s Turnwheel” and in this game it has been christened “Divine Pulse.” While having limited uses per battle, using Divine Pulse allows players to travel to the turn or action of their choice and have another go at it, undoing a unit’s death or attempting another potential strategy. For all those random “gotcha!” moments these games occasionally dole out, like an unlucky enemy critical hit, or sudden reinforcements, Divine Pulse ends up taking away a lot of the frustration that would otherwise arise. It certainly makes runs on the Classic difficulty toggle, wherein each death in battle is treated as permanent deaths, a lot more manageable. Full disclosure here, I went Normal Casual for this game, and admittedly the game lacks a lot of bite here. Perfect for a newcomer for sure, and there are still some standout missions that required me to reload and try again, no matter how many uses of Divine Pulse I had, but fans that crave challenge might be a tad disappointed. Harder difficulties are coming in a free update, however, so there’s that. On the whole, I think the game did a good job in streamlining some aspects and making it easier to glean information from what’s on screen without reducing depth.

IN CONCLUSION, FEAR THE DEER

The announcement trailer for Three Houses had me nervous, admittedly. After Fates had quite a few missteps, this title needed to be a slam dunk to rebuild faith in the series, at least in my eyes. Hearing all of the positive impressions from reviewers before launch got me interested and upon finishing the Gold Deer route, I was left with a sense of relief. Three Houses surpassed a lot of my expectations, and ultimately delivered on what I wanted out of a home console Fire Emblem experience. The school setting seemed like an odd choice but put into practice, it worked out perfectly for the game and I hope later titles keep finding ways to keep things fresh. Most issues I have with the game are fairly minor, nitpicks at best, and do little to sour me on the title. Yes, there’s the odd nest of menus to navigate for certain things, certain characters aren’t as compelling as they could be, and the game ain’t exactly a looker a lot of the time, but hooked me from the first time I booted it up and it took a lot to pull me away from playing, and that says enough. Fire Emblem: Three Houses is a fantastic starting point for new fans, and a deep, rewarding experience for series veterans. I know strategy RPGs aren’t exactly for everyone, but anyone who has even a passing interest shouldn’t hesitate to add this to your Switch library.

Fear the Deer.

-B

#fire emblem three houses #nintendo switch #golden deer #blue lions #black eagles #edlegard #dimitri #claude #SRPG #Persona #shin megami tensei

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ill-be-istj-if-no-one-else-is · 5 years

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MBTI, Mental Health, and Uncertainty

This is a long post but I think it might be one of my most important ones, and I hope you can take the time to read it.

In light of a couple recent questions I want to address mental health in a different way than in the PSA post. I do still stand by that post! But it was intended to be more along the lines of providing succinct encouragement with clear steps, rather than a means of providing deeper context.

MBTI is an unreliable way (at best) to deal with mental health. It was not designed for it. It has a few aspects that are useful in a limited way, which is honestly how I feel about MBTI at large - it is one tool in a very large toolbox, and it’s not necessarily the best one at that, and plenty of people get along fine without using it at all. (in fact if you’re not up to reading the rest of this post consider this paragraph my main point and the rest all elaboration on that theme).

On a larger scale, a lot of Tumblr advice is a terrible way to deal with mental health. I recognize I’m offering advice here on Tumblr but in general my statement re: all things mental health is that stigma, accessibility, and poor clinicians are all serious barriers to good mental health information and treatment, but that doesn’t mean that the more accessible options of “randoms on the internet” or “psychological theories with a strong internet presence” are a viable substitute.

I think a personal example may be helpful here, so: I have some very severe food allergies. I’ve had them my whole life. And I do fully believe that they’ve shaped aspects of my personality. In some ways, they’ve made me more cautious and desiring of control over my environment. They’ve pushed me to explore things like cooking. They’ve required me to become someone who plans ahead, who advocates for herself, and who’s comfortable saying a firm “no” to intended hospitality. They’ve given me some areas of anxiety. They’ve made me a faster reader. They’ve arguably contributed to my sense of humor.

If I could push a button and get rid of my allergies, I would, without question, because they are often a source of stress and inconvenience. But they did contribute to me as a person, and had I grown up and developed without them, I would probably be different in some ways - and I have no idea how exactly I’d be different. Would I be as fast a reader or as detail-oriented if I didn’t have to read ingredients lists at a glance? Maybe - I was a bookish kid. Would I be as responsible and assertive? Possibly - I’m an oldest child, I was always on the stubborn and independent side. But really, who knows?

I went to a doctor when I was in grad school for a check-up and a top-up of my epi-pen prescription. I said I hadn’t had to use the epi-pen in years. He mentioned that he had a friend with the same allergy who had a reaction once every year or so because he was a little scattered and a huge socializer and people-pleaser, and so he often had reactions to baked goods around the holidays - baked goods that I would unequivocally politely turn down. Same condition. Wildly different responses.

Mental illnesses or conditions are highly analogous to this experience - if they’re debilitating and unpleasant, even if they’ve caused you to develop in positive ways, you’ll be glad for those benefits but you may wish you could flip a switch and get rid of them.

But other conditions might be so central to your identity that you genuinely would not be you without them, and the issues that arise are because your identity is not well-accommodated in your environment

And while I can speculate on which sorts of conditions fall into which bucket (most people with depression would put it in the first; autism, for many autistic people, is in the second; this is a huge topic I can’t do justice here but you can even see this categorization in my language). But in the end, it’s a case-by-case choice dependent on the person with that condition. For more on the nature of ‘abnormal’ conditions and self-conception I highly recommend the Oliver Sacks essay “Witty Ticcy Ray” specifically, and his essay collections The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat and An Anthropologist on Mars. But if you can’t get to those my point is that people’s relationships with things that affect their cognition are complex and deeply personal.

So coming back to MBTI. Is MBTI the reason why I am vigilant and others with allergies are less so? Well, we don’t entirely know where type comes from, but maybe. Maybe it’s my upbringing, maybe it’s my inherent self, maybe it’s something else. We don’t know. I don’t know.

With mental illnesses, there’s a second factor. Allergic reactions are physiological and predictable- doesn’t matter what kind of person you are, if you eat the thing you can’t eat, your body will initiate the immune response. But when your illness or condition also affects your cognition, MBTI isn’t just a reason for how you respond to the condition. Your type, or at least your personality that you attempt to categorize into a type, is both influenced by and feeds into the outward signs of said condition. The outward signs of mental illnesses are themselves diverse! The PHQ-9 survey, a very common depression screening tool, doesn’t require that you display every single possible symptom - just a certain amount of them together (and even then it’s just a starting point for an individual follow-up. So we don’t know what’s ‘you’ and what’s the condition and what’s the combination thereof and even if you and the effects of said condition can really be seen as separate entities.

What this means practically is that figuring out how personality type, in any system, impacts mental health is an astronomically hard task, because both type and mental illness are best described as collections of a sufficient number of coexisting patterns of thought and behavior, not an absolute yes/no. If you’re trying to figure out yourself, again, MBTI is one of many tools and should not be your only point of reference - it’s a good starting point but at some point you’re going to have to leave it and jump into the vast unknown of what the self truly is (I feel very cheesy typing this but funnily enough I think Jung would back me up here). But only you can really do that. I certainly can’t do it for you.

Something that I think a lot of people forget is the origin of MBTI. MBTI was developed using Jung’s idea of cognitive functions as a starting point, and the catalyst was Myers and Briggs (her mother) noticing that Myers’s husband (an ISTJ) was really different from them (both high Ne users) in terms of personality. They took a theory because it matched what they observed in real life. I am unsurprisingly in favor of this. You want to know how people act? Interact with them! You can sum up larger trends in a theory, but it will always be a simplification of the infinitely complex truth. You can’t know how MBTI will make any one person act with any certainty - you can only guess.

Similarly, things like loops and grips are a bit of a one-way street. MBTI theorists observed that certain patterns of stress behavior tended to crop up more frequently in individuals of the same type and came up with names for them and a theory to describe why they may occur. This does not mean that the same behaviors cannot exist in people of other types. This does not guarantee that a person of a certain type and under stress will fall into a loop, a grip, or really do any specific action at all. As I have said many times and will say again, mental illness and stress have real, measurable neurochemical effects and people will ‘self-medicate’ (eg: seeking endorphin-releasing activities when unhappy), and type doesn’t enter into it (which is also why I think the advice to look at your stress behavior is not particularly good).

Finally, even if you are in a loop or grip, if you’re having a difficult time, a decent therapist will probably give you advice that isn’t out of line with MBTI recommendations, because there’s more than one way to come to the same conclusion! A lot of advice is broadly applicable - start with small steps and be gentle with yourself, for example. Play to your strengths - and you don’t need to know MBTI to know what you’re good at. You need to have a general sense of who you are and MBTI is a way to categorize who you are, not a way to do that initial self-discovery.

In conclusion: I know I sound like a broken record, but if you’re interested in human behavior at large please, please treat MBTI as one of many aspects of it. If you have the opportunity to take a class or do some serious reading about neuroscience, cognitive science, psychology, sociology, or basic statistics I recommend it, and whether or not you can do those things, interact with people! Sitting behind a computer screen theorizing how an archetype that must necessarily describe literally hundreds of millions of people is not really a helpful exercise! “Go outside” isn’t a threat to be read in the tone of ‘get off my lawn’; it might be said in a mildly exasperated way but it is meant as an invitation to a vast resource that you are not using to its fullest.

#mbti #long post

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