#it's like three levels. knowing is the 1st one and you nod and you're like 'i may or may not forget about this subconsciously. but i know'

[syrinq]

spending more time forming active coherent thoughts in my brain like "how am i feeling right now?" like i'm my own therapist to gauge how the current meds are affecting me, teaching myself the habit to actually stop and think before i say or act on shit

versus just blurting out whatever comes to mind first now, because i also am getting more aware of how much thought traffic there is and i want to talk about whatever car crash occurred, resulting in more brain farts than i'd like to admit

[emerald-notes]

Noona! Please! Help! - Part 4

Fandom: BTS Characters: Younger Brothers BTS and Elder Sister Narrator Genre: A Little Dramatic and A Little Comedic Word Count: 900+ Words Warning: Academic stress, despair etc. Note: It’s a siblings AU story of BTS with the narrator as their elder sister. I tried to write something different from what I usually write about. I had fun making this. Hope it makes you feel good too. Happy Reading Everyone :)

Summary: Her little brothers can’t attend to a single task without her help. Be it a dance competition or asking out a girl for a date, they always seem to be finding everything too hard to go through without her by their side. ‘Our lucky charm’; that’s what they like to call her. But what if she turns out to be a misfortune in different situations in one single day?

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - More to come

Goodbye, SNU...:

11:17 a.m. 1st September, 2015

Almost all the students seem to have gotten out of the exam hall already but there is no sign of Jimin. What can that mean?

"I don't think his exam went well, noona!" Yoongi quietly puts my thoughts into words.

I shake my head, "He must be talking to a friend. Jimin’s exam must go well. He prepared for it for months."

"Accidents happen, you know!" Yoongi shrugs.

Finally I see Jimin, slouching, coming out of that building all alone. My heart feels heavy. Jimin will not recover from this any time soon if something goes wrong.

Yoongi calls out, "Jiminah! Here!"

There is a moment of confusion in his face at first. Then it fades to recognition. He slowly walks towards us and gives a weak smile.

"Was it that bad?" I ask.

Jimin nods. His smile turns upside down. And the next thing we know is his eyes are wet. Jimin is crying.

I am sitting at a cafe table waiting for my two brothers to come from the washroom, wondering what life lesson the older one is teaching the younger one in his hour of despair. It does not take long. Finally, they make their way towards me.

“Everything okay, now?” I ask.

“Tolerable!” Yoongi sighs. There is a hint of annoyance in his voice.

As soon as they sit down, Jimin begins ranting about all the silly mistakes he had made. His brain was a mess during the exam time so he couldn’t concentrate properly and he had marked the number of bills and coins in South Korea to be five and four respectively whereas the answer is quite the opposite.

“C’mon, Jiminah, everyone knows that” Yoongi grunts mockingly and I glare at him to stop teasing.

I turn to Jimin and, noticing the dark circles and the sharp jawline, ask him, “Have you been properly eating and sleeping, Jiminie?”

“What?” His look was wearied. That answers my question.

I say, “Listen! What you really need is a proper meal and some sleep.” I check the watch on my wrist and calculate the amount of time still remaining before I meet up with Namjoon. “Alright! Let’s go to granma’s place and I’ll cook both of you some hearty meals.”

Driving all the way to granma’s place is tiring to some extent. It is all the more exhausting when you have a passenger talking non-stop about how terrible he’s feeling and how his life is all dark ahead of him as if not getting into SNU means that your life’s over. I understand that all the unnecessary amount of caffeine Jimin had consumed within the last few months had done little to no good to him. What surprises me more is the level of patience Yoongi has for Jimin. Because I am slowly losing my mind right now.

At last, here I am, trying to make some quick healthy lunch for me and my two little ones.

“You're home already?” The youngest enters the kitchen.

Alright. Three little ones now.

I hastily add more water and some spicy ingredients to the soup before turning to speak to Jungkook. “Yes! Just to prepare lunch. Go say hi to Yoongi and Jimin.”

“They're here?” He excitedly leaves without waiting for my answer.

The familiar sound of the boys’ laughter fills the living room. It is carried to my ears which in turns brings a smile to my lips. I prepare the dishes, pour the soup, take the kimchi out of the fridge and finally call Yoongi to help me carry them to the table.

I am surprised to not find Jimin in the dining room.

“Hyung fell asleep so I carried him to my room. He looked so tired. Didn't want to wake him up.” Jungkook informs.

“But the food will go cold when he wakes up.” I say.

Yoongi pulls the sleeve of my shirt and motions me to sit down, “it's alright. I'll just warm them up for him.”

I say, “You start eating. I’m gonna go check on him.”

Yoongi shrugs, “he’ll be alright, noona. We all do.”

I nod a little but my heart does not agree. Jimin is a perfectionist. I know how much it hurts him when he fails to meet his ambitions. And it pains me to even think how this is going to affect him. He is going to be so hard on himself from now on.

I step inside Jungkook’s almost-bare-except-for-a-bed bedroom and find Jimin snoring softly. He looks peaceful in his sleep. Almost angelic other than the fact that he has lost so much weight over the past few months so he looks kinda ill. His eyes have sunken into perfect brown circles and his jawlines look as if it can cut.

I slowly run my hand over his hair as my eyes start to prick. I wish he would stop worrying about being perfect. I wish he knew he was more than his mistakes. I wish he knew how much he is loved.

I quietly go back to eat. Luckily Yoongi and Jungkook are already immersed in a conversation about some comic books that I barely know about. After a few minutes of munching on my food in silence, my phone rings from the kitchen so I have to excuse myself. It is Namjoon.

“Noona! It's already 1:50. Are you sure you can make it in time?” I hear Namjoon's worried voice from the other side of the speaker.

“I'm leaving home right away. You wait for me a little longer. Can you do that?”

There is a moment of silence. Then Namjoon speaks, “of course, I'll wait. I ain't doing this without my lucky charm.”

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[maxverstappensflatbrim]

Show Me Yours | Matty Healy [28]

chapter twenty-eight, act four: somebody else

masterlist

little Author's note /TW before this act begins. There's going to be alot of talk of drug use and addiction within the chapters coming, if you're not comfortable with these kinds of things please don't read.

May 1st 2015

Matty rubs his tired eyes slowly as he keeps blinking at the screen in front of him, George is passed out on the seat beside him, he’d moved three together to fit his body with his head in Matty’s lap. The singer occasionally freezes when the drummer stirs but carries on with work once he’s settled again.

Adam has gone since Carly’s visiting, they’re staying in a hotel not too far away and Ross has claimed the pull out sofa.

Tommie had disappeared a while ago, moaning about something that Claeb had done again as she talked on the phone with this new Phoebe he is yet to meet.

When she does return he doesn't realise it, he’s working on a song muttering to himself as he does.

“One verse isn’t good enough Matty, come on….”

He sighs, replaying it and she grabs the headphones quietly putting them on to listen to what he’s working on.

‘I'll quote ‘On the road’ like a twat And wind my way out of the city Finding a girl who is equally pretty won't be hard Oh, I just had a change of heart’

She freezes, listening to the song slowly, head titlted in that way he usually finds adorable and then she scoffs.

The noise is what catches Matty’s attention and he turns quickly, eyes widening when he sees her standing behind him, “Baby-”

She shakes her head and starts walking out of the studio, he’s quick but careful as he moves George’s head, chasing her down the hallway.

“Baby, wait, Tom. Tommie!”

“What?”

“Wait, I need you- need your help.” He says stopping her, with a hand placed on her upper arm.

“That's it?”

He swallows then nods silently, “That’s it?” She asks the question again, hoping the change of tone, from annoyance to desperation, will open his eyes to the hurt she feels.

“Yeah, uh-”

“Is that song about me?”

“Tom-”

“Is it?” She asks, “It’s my words, Matty. I called you a twat, I- I said all those things to you Matty. ‘A Change of Heart’ are you fucking serious?”

“I was struggling to write,” He says, tongue peeking out to wet his lips, “I needed song inspiration, it was exciting.”

“Exciting.” The word tastes weird to her, like copper and cigarettes.

He steps back, maybe that wasn’t the right word. “I can’t take this.”

“Take what?”

She moves her hand around the gap between them, “This, this weird thing that's been going on. I… I miss us.”

“There was never an ‘us’, Tommie.”

“That’s not what-” She sighs and turns away as the lift dings at their level, “Not what I meant. And you know it.”

She moves her foot so the doors won't close, turning her body to him, “I miss what we were.”

“What was that?”

“Friends, bandmates, I’m not entirely sure. But we didn’t constantly disagree like this, we had movie nights, we talked, it wasn’t…weird.”

“Yeah, well that was ruined when you got a boyfriend.”

She scoffs, a violent sort of scoff he’s sure she never would’ve been able to do if she never smoked in the first place.

“No, it got ruined the day you decided to stick your tongue down my throat and say it meant nothing.”

She steps into the lift, hitting the button for the ground floor and he tries to step in but she stops him with one glance.

“I need you.”

“Don’t worry,” She tells him pettily as she lifts her chin, “Finding a girl who is equally pretty won’t be hard.”

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ

May 22nd 2015

Tommie had successfully avoided Matty for three weeks. In that time she’d recorded guitar pieces for new songs, altered lyrics Matty needed her help with and even done backing vocals for some tracks.

Thanks to George she was able to come into the studio whenever she pleased as the moment Matty would leave he’d send her a quick text.

During the three weeks she’d also helped Caleb get his own place out in LA, the pair had decided that instead of him moving into her house back home in Wales they’d rent out an apartment together in LA.

It’s a small flat, one bedroom big enough for the two of them just a few blocks away from where Phoebe lives. She didn’t tell him that when they were first looking, knowing he’d try to go a little further away from anyone that they knew for privacy.

“How long are you gonna be?”

“Not sure.”

“You’re never sure.”

She sighs, “Album making is a long process, not like you’d understand.”

He pauses, it's when she doesn’t hear the little rhythmic chops of the knife that she realises she said that out loud.

Neither say anything, she continues to gather her books and moves to the counter separating them, “Cal-”

“Text me when you’re on your way home.”

“I’ll see you later.” She moves to him, lips pouted ready to meet his but he turns away. Instead her lips meet his stubbled cheek and she breathes in to avoid another comment.

“Bye.” She mutters under her breath.

Closing the door behind her she walks out the flat and fifteen minutes through the LA streets to their rented studio.

Adam’s in the booth, George clicking away at buttons in his little ‘producer’ chair.

She sets off to the kitchen, making coffee and tea for the trio, that’s where Adam finds her, moving around and muttering to herself.

“Hey.”

“Coffee?”

“Tea please.”

She nods using his little ‘world’s best grandmother’ mug Matty had gotten him for his birthday last year for some unknown reason, adding in the tea bag, water, milk then his one sugar.

She makes her own tea and a coffee for George but before she grips both mugs to take them out to him Adam stops her, “What’s going on with you?”

“What?”

Adam sighs, placing his mug on the counter behind him, “You’ve been acting weird,” He tells her, “In your own head too much, what’s going on in there?”

She sighs, crossing and uncrossing her arms, tugging on the sleeves of her cardigan before shrugging, “I don’t know. I… I have no reason to feel this way.”

“Feel what way?”

She shrugs, “Like I’m in some kind of slump. I feel…” She trails off looking away from him but she sees him nod encouragingly in the corner of her eye, “I feel like I’m out of my body, I’m going about my life day to day, you know, but by the time I get home and sit down, can’t remember a thing, feel like I’ve walked around the world yet done nothing all at the same time.”

She shakes her head, “Then my riffs and solos aren’t good enough, and everything I’m suggesting is turning out shit, and when I take over for George I start ruining takes, and my vocals are getting shit cause I can’t go as high as Matty wants me to go, and the songs I’m writing, Jesus, the fucking songs are terrible, Adam, nothings good-”

“Hey woah-” His hands are on her shoulders, pushing her into the ground as if she had begun to lift into the air, “Everything you said there is a complete lie. Your solos are amazing, you’re literally the best guitarist I have ever met. Your suggestions are good, most of them have worked out-”

“Not all-”

He quickly continues on, ignoring her interruption completely, “George is grateful for the takeovers, no one else is offering to sit in the chair for hours when he plays drums over and over. Your vocals are great, and you can go high, you’re just pushing yourself to try and beat Matty which you don’t need to do, work as a team, not against each other. And I’ve only seen one of the songs you’ve written but If I Believe You was so beautifully written, it made me question whether or not to go get christened.”

She giggles at the last statement and he smiles at her, “You’re stressing, and I think Matty has something to do with it,” He approaches the subject softly, making sure to tread on the subject carefully, “Did you guys get into a fight?”

She nods, “Over what?”

“Uh… Ashley.”

“His girlfriend, why?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Okay,” He says gently, “When you do I’ll be here waiting to listen.”

“Adam?”

He pauses by the door before he can leave, mug once again cupped between both of his hands, “Hmm?”

“Thank you for being my mam.”

“Thanks for being my son.”

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ

May 26th 2015

It’s quiet, too quiet.

George hasn't uttered a word since she came in. To be fair he was passed out asleep for four hours as she moved around writing and recording her background vocals. But then he woke up, and now another three hours later he still has barely said anything besides a greeting.

Then she hears his chair creek, he slowly slides his headphones off and glances a few times over to her before sighing.

“Matty-”

“No.”

“Tommie.” George sighs, “He’s been asking about you.”

She shifts, then looks over at him again, “Like?” She prods.

“Like… how you’ve been and stuff.”

“And stuff?”

George nods, “He wants to go over some song lyrics with you.”

She sighs and runs her hands through her hair already knowing where this is going, “He’s on his way.”

“George…”

The door opens, George is standing and grabbing his hoodie to slide it on, “I’m going back to sleep.”

He heads over to the door separating their studio and break room, not wanting to leave in case she actually murders Matty. Something George is very confident Tommie (the one who forces him to have ‘True Crime Thursdays’ once a week) is capable of doing.

Matty pauses, as if not believing she would actually be there and then swallows slowly before moving over to her.

She doesn’t look at him, fiddling about with the production setup and tinkering with all the settings on Ross’ bass, something she knows the giant will get annoyed about tomorrow. But that's tomorrow's issue.

He tugs the chair he’s now sitting in closer to her, opening his mouth several times with nothing coming out besides the noise of his quiet gulp.

“Tom-”

“I don’t want to speak to you.”

He sighs, head bowing down, hair covering his face then looks up through his brows, “I know. So, let me speak.”

He shifts closer again and she leans back, staring forward into the recording booth and away from him.

“What I wrote… I understand that it upset you, using your words and- and saying those things-”

“Saying what, Matthew?” She says harshly, ignoring his little comment of ‘oh, guess you’re peaking to me’, “That I’m replaceable, average, that you can find someone prettier in seconds, do you-”

She stands and he leans further back, preparing himself for anything, a slap, a punch, a knife to the vocal cords, “I know I’m not the prettiest, I mean in school boys never even second glanced at me and Caleb was the first guy to even attempt to flirt with me. I was used to the funny stares and the worthless whispers of comp bullies… but coming from you? My best friend, the person who I thought loved me the most?”

“No, no,” He moves to catch her hand to stop her from turning away, “Please, Tommie, you know I think the world of you. Of your talent, the way you write, you're the most beautiful person I have ever set my eyes on, and the more I got to know you the more beautiful you became to me-”

“Matt-”

“Please listen, Tommie-”

“I-” He sighs and looks at the floor, “I wrote the song when you first got with Caleb, because I was jealous.”

“Jealous?”

“I-” He sighs, “I wasn’t the main guy in your life anymore-” She opens her mouth, ready to comment on the guys, but he beats her to it, “And I did that to myself, I was the one who pushed you away and I’m sorry for doing that but- the truth…”

He sighs and looks down at where his thumb is tracing her knuckles. He moves one of her rings, a small plain silver ring with some Arctic Monkey lyrics engraved into it, around her finger.

“The truth is I still adore you, Tommie, and nothing really matters anyway when you're around me.”

He moves his other hand to catch her left hand so he’s holding them both between them, placing one kiss upon each hand, “I think the world of you, and this song was a moment of weakness where I let my jealousy get the better of me and I’m sorry…”

He looks at her socked feet, a huge pair of green fuzzy socks which are way too big, pool around her ankles below her rolled up sweatpants.

He can see the edge of one of her tattoos peeking out from beneath the trousers. It's one of his favourites of hers, a simple frame the same size as her box tattoo, with an old vintage styling outline.

“Say the word and I’ll take the song off the album.”

She turns away from him, “Don’t just say-”

“I’m not just saying anything,” He promises, “I-” He sighs and hangs his head, long unruly hair covering his face from her, then he lifts it, flicking his head back to get it out of his eyes, “I’m sorry.”

She doesn't say anything, the frown stays on her face and she stares past his head at the mixing booth behind him.

“Tom?”

Nothing.

“Baby?”

“I broke up with Caleb.” She decides to say.

She’s not sure why she says it, but she does. It lips out, so she decides to add on, “A few weeks back,” His face drops, shoulders falling nd smile vanishing, “We were arguing a lot, and then I listened-”

He turns away. He knows, he knows what she listened to, and oh how he wishes he never met Ashley, or at least didn't meet her until after.

“George told me.” He tells her. “That you listened to it, and… about Caleb.”

“We’ve moved in together now.” She finds herself telling him, shutting down any suggestions she can see spinning round in his head through the glint in his eyes.

He nods, “Told me that too.”

“I broke up with Ashley.” He tells her then, when the silence stretches too long and her hands are covered by the sleeves of her hoodie. “This morning, on my way here.”

“Why?”

He shrugs. He knows why. It’s the same reason she broke up with Caleb.

This unspoken agreement between them that they do want to be together, in more ways than friendship. But they’re both too stubborn.

“It was a fling, maybe out of boredom, maybe loneliness, I knew it wouldn’t last, and so did she.”

“I’ve missed you.” He says then.

She steps back, “Please, don’t-”

“I have. I’m sorry, this whole-” He moves his hand around in the space between them then stands to match her height, “Thing- Can we- can we just, start again?”

“Start again?”

“From the beginning?”

“No,” She says, “I can forgive you, slowly, but I won’t forget. I can’t forget.”

He nods, then brushes his hand across her arm, past her elbow until his thumb rests in the middle of her box,  “Tom, I just- I need you to know-”

There's a knock, then the door creaks open, Caleb stands there, bouquet of flowers in hand, hoodie and sunglasses on. Tommie doesn’t see what he’s wearing, but Matty does and he lets out a little puff of hair at the irony.

There’s no need for Caleb to disguise himself, no one knows who he is.

“Oh, hey, Matt-”

He lifts his head in a greeting and sits back down in George’s chair.

Tommie licks her lips, still staring at him but he's turned the chair and is moving around to set the booth up to record some more vocals for one of the new songs.

She stares at his side profile, ignoring the sound of her boyfriend’s steps as they get closer to her, “Babe?”

Matty licks his lips, doing that little tongue into his cheek thing that used to drive her nuts. Now she wants to punch him.

“Hmm?”

He smiles a little when she blinks, shaking her head to then focus on him, “You okay?”

She nods and smiles back at him, “Yeah, sorry, just in my own head trying to get these lyrics right.”

He nods, kissing her cheek, “Sure, you’ll figure it out, uh… can we talk? Outside?”

She casts one more glance at Matty, hoping he’ll fly from his chair, wrap his arms around her and beg her not to follow.

She wants him to get to his knees and hold her there, hold her there in the studio with him, tell her not to follow Caleb. Tell her to break up with him, to leave him, abandon him. 

Because the truth is she’d still drop Caleb for him, he just needs to say the words.

He just needs to promise her he’ll get it right.

Matty doesn't move, he leans back in the chair staring at the microphone in front of him. Humming along to one of their tracks, Paris.

She nods and follows him outside, taking the flowers from him, “Look, I’m sorry about the last few weeks, I just-” He shakes his head pushing his hands into his pocket, “I think… maybe moving in has been a bit stressful since we’ve been trying to get the place sorted, and when you’re there I’m not, then when I’m there you’re not-'' He stops himself, “Point is, I think the reason we’re going back and forth all the time s because we never see each other.”

She nods in agreement, “I’m sorry, I-” She considers telling him the truth but then changes her mind, “I’ve just been taking the night shift to cover for George, he works himself too hard and I’m worried sometimes.”

The real thing she wants to say is Matty has the normal shift, the nine to five, day shifts, so she's taking the night shifts to avoid him. Stay out of his way. But if she tells Caleb that she will have to explain why. Tell him why they’re arguing, that they slept together, that she was going to break up with him.

“Let me make it up to you,” He says, “Show you I’m sorry, I mean, you were so patient as I made my EP-” She was on tour and barley around, she had no time for him not the other way around, “I’ll take you out to dinner, you pick the date, the time.”

She smiles, “I’ll take tomorrow night off, I think everyone wants a break, I’ll force them to leave the studio and do actual human things.”

He nods, “Tomorrow night, I’ll go over to the guy's place, and then I’ll come pick you up at 6, like the old days.”

“The old days.”

Four months ago.

Caleb smiles brushing her hair back over her shoulder, “We’ll go somewhere fancy, dress nice, you can do your hair.”

She frowns, but she doesn't comment.

“See you tomorrow then.”

He smiles, walking away from where she’s standing in the door frame.

Matty watches her, the way her hands are at her sides, thumb tapping along each finger, pointer middle, ring, pinkie, pinkie, ring, middle, pointer.

Her back is tense, shoulders slumped.

Button nudges his knee and looks over at her, Matty shakes his head as if the dog can understand and turns back to the song in front of him just as Tommie turns back into the room.

She swallows the rising lump of guilt and tugs her cotton t-shirt down a little before walking into the booth.

⋆｡ ﾟ☁︎｡ ⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ

June 3rd 2015

When Tommie wakes up that morning, bed cold and lonely, she doesn't expect to smell something sweet from the kitchen.

She rubs her eyes, wrapping herself up in a zip up and follows the smell and sound of humming down to the kitchen.

Only she doesn't find her boyfriend, apron on in his boxers like he usually is. No, he’s in New Jersey supporting one of his friends' bands who she’s never even heard of.

She finds Matty. Grey joggers, hair swept over one side of his head and one of their own band hoodies on.

Button is sitting on his feet, greedily waiting for food to drop on the floor as he makes what seems to be pancakes.

He turns to grab the butter he’d left on the counter and jumps, “Jesus Christ! You scared the shit out of me.”

“Me?” She asks in shock, “You broke into my house.”

“To make you breakfast.” He grins pointing the spatula at the pan.

She raises a brow, wrapping her arms around herself as she moves slowly to the breakfast bar, it separates them from each other but it's a good enough spot she can still see him perfectly.

“What are you doing here?”

“It's your birthday.”

She shrugs, pulling the sleeves down to cover her hands, “And?”

“I never miss a birthday.”

He pushes a little bag towards her and she raises her eyebrows, but then he pushes it closer again and with a sigh she grabs the little string handles to pull it closer.

Inside is a little digital camera. Not just any camera. The exact same sony little red camera she had for her eleventh birthday when she went through a photography phase.

She remembers saying something to him, about six months or so back-

‘If I could do another book I’d do one like Alexa Chung, put my old photos in it, maybe take some new ones.’

“Matt…”

“I bought it ages ago, saw it in a shop in London back in like…” He thinks for a second, “December maybe, so…”

She frowns as she looks across the counter to him, “Matt…”

“Look, I just- I’m sorry, alright. I don’t exactly know what for anymore, I just know I am. I must’ve fucked up if youre not talking to me and I just want us to be us-”

She cuts him off as she pulls him across the counter top to wrap her arms around him, holding herself to him, “Thank you.”

She sniffs, eyes glancing to the stove, “You’re burning the pancakes.”

“Shit!”

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[taliesin-19]

Random Fact (scene) of the Week: September 1st edition

"Just breathe, you've got nothing to be afraid of. We'll all be here for you, and we'll be proud of you no matter what happens."

"Oi! Who's the one going off to Hogwarts, here?" James said, pushing past them all and making his way casually through the barrier to platform 9 and 3/4.

Abby let out a little squeak. "He doesn't have to be so blase about it," she said, looking at Harry with a frown.

"Ignore him," Harry said, directing her towards the brick wall. "Why don't you take Al's hand, yeah? He'll guide you through."

Harry squeezed the boy's shoulder, then watched as Al led Abby gently towards the brick wall before abruptly tugging on her arm and sprinting towards it.

"She's totally going to kill me for that later, isn't she?" Harry told Lily as Abby's scream evaporated into thin air.

"Eh, once she's seen the train, she'll get over it," Lily said with a wave of her hand. "That's how it goes every year with Teddy."

The first time Abby had tagged along to see Teddy off to Hogwarts, the entrance to the platform had unlocked a fear in her that she hadn't known she possessed.

"I guess I just don't like running straight at brick walls!" she'd exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air after coming down from a mini panic attack.

"You three, go with Grandmum and Teddy, we'll meet you there--and stop laughing James, this isn't funny," Harry said as Abby took several deep breaths.

It took a lot of coaxing, a lot of breathing, and a lot of encouragement, but Harry had learned to always leave the house an extra twenty minutes early every 1st of September.

Abby had offered plenty of times to stay behind, but he knew it was only because she hated being a bother. The look on her face whenever she saw the Hogwarts Express was enough to make Harry forcibly bring her along each year. And she'd never forgive herself if she didn't see Teddy, and now James, off for the year.

And besides, she was getting better about it. She hasn't even hyperventilated this year.

"Come on, flower, you're up," Harry said.

"Can we leave James at Hogwarts for the winter and summer holidays, too?" she said, over her shoulder.

"I'll consider it."

Lily grinned.

They both knew they'd be counting down the days till December, but if Harry spent too much time thinking about it, he might just break down into a panic attack himself.

When he was a kid, he'd never given a second thought to what everyone else might feel like, standing on platform 9 and 3/4, watching the train leave.

Hogwarts was his escape, the train was a beacon of hope and freedom.

But as an adult, he dreaded the sight of it.

Through the barrier and onto the platform, he watched as one by one, everyone bid James and Teddy farewell. It was Teddy's final year at Hogwarts. And the fact that he'd be there during James' first year was just about the only thing that prevented Harry from calling this all off together.

He pulled Teddy aside and gave him a long hug. "Have fun, Mr Head Boy," he said, causing Teddy to grin. "They'd be so proud of you, you know. Especially Remus. Tonks, well...she'd probably call you a nerd."

Teddy laughed and looked down.

"But she'd also be really proud," Harry said with a wink. "As am I. Ridiculously so."

"I know," Teddy said. "And before you say anything. Don't worry. I'll watch out for the little bugger. I promise, Harry."

Harry swallowed hard and nodded, squeezing Teddy's shoulder. "I know he'll forget to write to me tonight. Can you just let me know what House he's in?"

Teddy nodded. "I'll let you know as soon as he gets into Gryffindor."

"Oi, don't jinx it," Harry said before giving Teddy one last hug.

With a long exhale, Harry then went to find James, his heart heavy in his chest.

The rest of the family subtly moved away as he approached, for which he was grateful.

"How are you feeling, mate?" Harry said, crouching down so they were at eye level.

"Good," James said with a shrug. "Freddie's saved me a seat. Oh, that reminds me, can I have some extra money for sweets? Freddie said that Uncle George said that there's a trolley lady that turns into a carnivorous bird who attacks you if you try to leave the train, but she also sells a bunch of different sweets and if you buy some, you'll be on her good side."

Harry sighed. "There's money in the pocket of your trunk, don't waste it all on sweets."

James grinned and went in for a hug. "Okay, bye, Dad!"

"Whoa whoa whoa," Harry said, pulling him back before he could leave. "That's it? Just 'bye, Dad'? I'm not gonna see you for several months, you know."

With a small groan, James relented. "I'll write to you, okay? And besides Teddy will be there. And Fred. And Vic. And Dom. And Alice--"

"Okay, okay, I get it," Harry said. "I'm gonna miss you, is all. But...I want you to have fun. And stay out of trouble, make friends, and just...just make good choices."

James stared at him as if he'd grown another head. "Sure, Dad, I'll do that," he said before going in for another hug. "I'll miss you, too."

Harry closed his eyes and squeezed the boy tight, willing the moment to last forever.

"Love you, Jamie," he said.

"Love you, too, Dad."

After finally letting go, Harry took hold of the boy's trunk and helped him load it on the train.

A few upper year Ravenclaws were passing by, but when they spotted Harry, they stopped abruptly in the corridor and stared openly.

James snorted. "Bye, Dad!" he said in a loud voice. "I'm so glad you could take time out of your busy schedule saving the world to see me off today."

The Ravenclaws erupted into furious whispers as they continued their paths to their compartments.

"That'll get old real quick," Harry said.

James shrugged. "Might as well give them what they want. It's fun to see their reactions."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "You've been spending too much time with Abby."

"Should've thought about that before you married her," James said, patting him on the shoulder. "Anyway...guess I should be going."

With a nod, Harry stood up with a long sigh. "You better write me tonight. Even if it's just to say what House you're in."

"I will, Dad."

"Otherwise I'll come to Hogwarts myself--"

"Dad."

Harry winked. "Have fun," he said. "I'll see you at Christmas."

James paused for a moment, his face pinching into a small frown. He then hurried over to Harry and gave him once last, bone-crushing hug, before running down the corridor.

With a smile, Harry met the rest of the family on the platform and waved goodbye till the last carriage of the train disappeared from sight.

[nicklesbam]

Promise part 2

gore, swearing

Y/n made sure to close the blinds and move the desk in front of the door after locking it. She looked to the blonde man and he was loosening screws on the vent above us

"What are you doing?" She spoke. He looked to her for a second

"Plan B in case it gets through" y/n nodded. She looked down in thought for a minute

"If it finds us, we die right?" He looked to her with an amused smirk

"Wow, so you figured it out. This your first game?" He questioned still working on the screws

"Yeah. I was on my way to the hospital when everyone disappeared" he nodded and looked back at her

She looked around, thinking for a second. She suddenly walked towards the desk and started pushing. She struggled a bit but got it moving towards the door

"You gonna help or just sit here and look pretty?" She remarked to the blonde man. He smirked

He moved from his spot and took a spot beside her. He helped her push the desk against the door. She guessed he didn't exactly work out before all this but he did help at least. She smiled at him

"Thank you" and he nodded in return. Our phones went off

'The game will now commence. The time limit is 40 minutes. Commence now.'

Y/n took a deep breath and sat against the wall on the floor. She stared at the camera's hoping that whatever 'it' was stayed away from them. She took another deep breath to calm herself down

The blonde man observed her carefully. How could she devise a whole plan, figure out what the risk of the game was, and find the perfect spot to hide but be so scared and anxious at the same time. The look on y/n's face remained stoic most of the time but it's cracking a little

It wasn't until she noticed the man staring that she fixed it. She took one final deep breath before speaking

"Anxiety. Deep breaths help me sometimes" she said while her gaze remained on the camera's. He nodded

"Your doctor tell you that?" He joked though his face and voice remain monotone

"Actually my therapist" she retorted smiling, it may be small but it's genuine. He hasn't seen a genuine smile in a while

"Since we're stuck here for the next 37 minutes, what's your name?" She asked turning to face him. He was leaning on the wall where he can see the camera's still

"Why would I tell you?" He mused. She lightly scoffed and smiled

"Secretive are we? Fine, I'll go first. I'm y/n, nice to meet you" she said while holding her hand out. He chuckled a bit before shaking her hand

"Chishiya" she nodded

"You're a doctor, aren't you?" She asked tilting her head to the side a bit. He smirked again, surprised she figured it out

"How'd you guess?" He leaned back against the wall. She smiled and pointed to his hand

"Your hand. You use precise movements and they're very soft, not calloused" he had sharp eyes, not angry but suspicious

"You worked in the medical field? A nurse?" He asked. Usually he doesn't bother to get to know his opponents or fellow players but she was just so inviting and persuasive

"Yeah I did. That was actually why I was on my way over to the hospital. I had to cover another shift" she spoke tiredly. He nodded remembering his intern days when he would almost never get any sleep

"Any advice for a future nurse?" She mused. He chuckled shortly

"I wouldn't be the one to help you with that" she nodded understanding that they don't have the same jobs

Suddenly they heard shots. Y/n flinched at the sudden noise and looked to the surveillance camera. It was someone in a clown costume

"Odd choice for an outfit but ok" she murmured out loud. Y/n and Chishiya were on the 3rd level of the mall, the highest level. 'It' was on the 1st floor. They were checking in every room

They watched at it found a girl in a frozen yogurt shop and shot her dead. Y/n had to calm herself down, she closed her eyes and took three deep breaths

When she opened her eyes again she saw a person running across one of the camera feeds

"What are they doing? They're gonna get killed if they keep moving like that" y/n thought outloud

"Looks like another one's about to bite it like they always do" y/n turned to him with a glare

"These are people we're talking about, not animals" after she said that he chuckled

"Oh you have no idea" she brushed the comment off and turned back to the feed. A girl just got found in a clothing store. She tried to run but bullets are faster, she got shot down. Y/n looked away to the floor

"He's coming to our level" he spoke out. Y/n got up and turned the lights out. She got low on the floor again trying to be as quiet as possible. Suddenly the speakers to the mall went off

'Ten minutes left'

They could hear the person get more frustrated and scared. They watch the monitors as they check all stores and rooms on the level. Soon all that was left was the security office

Y/n turned to chishiya and signaled to the vent, he nodded. They quietly get up and walk over to the chair under the vent, before y/n climbs up she walks over to the weapons area and grabs a taser and gun

She handed the gun to chishiya but he nodded no and pointed to the taser. She almost laughed at how lucky he was but nodded and handed him the taser

Suddenly they heard the knob to the door try to open. Y/n turned to chishiya and pushed him to the chair, urging him to hurry up and climb in the vent. He had to use his upper body strength to lift himself into the vent

As he was struggling to get in, the door was shot at. They hit the knob and the door would've opened right up if it weren't for the desk in the way. Chishiya finally pushed himself all the way in and it was y/n's turn

The door made a banging sound as it tried to stomp on the door to open it faster

"Well isn't this just great."

[thehorrorsoftheblackbunnymask]

The Proxy's Little Pet

Summary: You're a psychologist that works at the insane asylum, and you're assigned to deal with the infamous criminals that claim to be the legend, Slenderman's, proxies. Little do you know that these three will be a lot more dangerous than what they seem...

Warnings: PTSD, Mental Disorders, Manipulation, Sexual Assault, Past Rape (Mentioned), Memory Loss, Mental Hospitals, Anxiety, Violence, Choking, Past Abuse and Crying.

Author's note: IT'S FINALLY FINISHED LET'S GO!

Links: [Part 2]

Edit: If you want to be tagged in part 2, just leave a comment.

You were new, everyone could tell. You were young, just graduating and this being your first real job.

One of the security guards was showing you around the Asylum. The asylum had 5 floors. Floor 1 held the least dangerous patients, while floor 5 held the most dangerous.

Since the Asylum knew how good you were, since you were recommended by the college you went to, you'll be working on the 5th floor. The security guard was hesitant as they unlocked the doors of the 5th floor, as you walked down the hallways you glanced at the paitents in the rooms. One was a black and white clown with a pointy nose, the smile he gave you sent shivers down your spine, another was a boy that looked similar to Link, he just stared at you. The security guard turned back around and began to walk down to the doors.

"So uh, who will be the patients I'll be working with?" You asked nervously.

"3."

"Who are those three."

"The head of this floor, Miss. Gullermary, will give you their folders. Go to her office, it's on the 1st floor."

You nodded as you walked down the stairs. The Asylum was loud. There were screams, cries, laughter and groans all over the place, not to mention the place was filthy.

Once you were on the first floor, you walked towards that had ' Miss Gullermary' on it. You knocked and only went in when you heard a ' come in'.

"Hello Miss Gullermary."

"Hello, you're Y/N L/N, correct?"

"Yes, it's a pleasure to-"

"Enough with the politeness. If you keep that attitude those level 5 paitents will eat you up and spit you out! Now an I making myself clear?!" Miss Gullermary asked, slamming her fist down on her desk.

"Y-Yes M-Ma'am..."

"The level 5 paitents know your fresh meat, news spreads like wild fire in this place. Here are your paitents folders."

You took the folders from Miss Gullermary's hands before opening the first one.

"Name: Timothy Wright.

Age: [Redacted]

Date Of Birth: [Unknown]

Disorders: Insanity, Extreme Anxiety

Crimes: Murder, Stalkings, trespassing, kidnappings, Sexual assault, multiple accounts of rape and Abuse

Background info: Unknown At This Time.

Floor: Level 5/Dangerous

Concerns: Please write any concerns here.

Restrictions/Warnings: This patient is to be kept away from Brian Thomas and Tobias Rogers at all times. Known to be extremely manipulative."

The folder had to two pictures. One was a feminine looking mask, and the other one was a guy with sideburns.

You pulled out the second folder, Miss. Gullermary lighting up a cigarette as she heard you read the files.

"Name: Brian Thomas.

Age: [Redacted]

Date Of Birth: [Unknown]

Disorders: Insanity

Crimes: Stalking, Murders, Theft, Kidnappings, Sexual assault, multiple accounts of rape and Abuse

Background info: Unknown

Floor: Level 5/dangers

Concerns: Write any concerns here.

Restrictions/Warning: This patient is to be kept away from Timothy Wright and Tobias Erin Rogers at all times. Known to be extremely manipulative."

You grabbed the last folder as a loud scream could be heard throughout the hallway, making your skin crawl.

"Name: Tobias Erin Rogers.

Age: [Redacted]

Date Of Birth: [Redacted]

Disorders: CIPA, Schizophrenia, Tourette Syndrome, PTSD, Amnesia, ADHD, Depression, Bi-Polar.

Crimes: Murder, Torture, Vandalism, Arson, Stalking, Patricide, Kidnapping, Sexual assault, multiple accounts of rape and Abuse.

Background info: Abusive home life, Deceased sister, murdered his abusive father, bullied for most of his life, had no friends.

Floor: Level 5/Dangerous

Concerns: Write concerns here.

Restrictions/Warning: This patient is to be kept away from Timothy Wright and Brian Thomas at all times. Known to be extremely manipulative. Known to have dangerous mood swings."

"Poor guy..." You said, putting his folder down.

"Don't feel bad, that's just what they want. Their monsters, no doubt about it. Their trauma is no excuse for their actions. Now, Tobias hasn't seen a psychologist in a month or two, so you'll meet with him today. So I recommend taking his folder with you."

You nodded before taking all three folders with you. You walked up the stairways and got back to the 5th floor. Even though you were standing outside, you heard laughter and screams from within, and it sent shivers down your spine. Opening the door with a security guard behind you , you walked down the halls until you got to room 16, Tobias Erin Rogers room. You peeked through the small window and saw the man twitching as his arms were in restraints. The security guard told you he had recently broke one of the nurses' arms and has to be restrained until further notice.

"LET ME OUT YOU FUCKING BASTARDS! I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU! YOU HEAR ME?! EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU WILL BE DEAD!" Toby yelled, twisting and turning all of the place.

The security guard opened the door and you were face to face with Toby. His room was pretty messy. A rusted bed in the corner and that was it. There were crayons and pencils with a notebook for him to draw in, since his previous physcologist said it would help him, since he has high stress levels.

Toby looked at you as his entire body twitched, a smile creeping onto his face before he was yanked up by the security guard. As you, the security guard and Toby walked down the halls to go to the floors therapy, or interagation room as the Level 5 paitents called it, a guy with a bloody smiled yelled from one of the cells.

"TOBY! ARE YOU GOING TO RIP THIS PSYCHOLOGISTS' FACE OFF, LIKE THE OTHER ONE?!"

"FUCK OFF JEFF!" Toby yelled, his body twitching before he fell down.

"Don't listen to them, they're just saying that to scare you," The security guard said, grabbing Toby by his hair so he could stand up right.

You opened the door of the therapy room and sat down on a chair, the security guard sat Toby on the chair before letting his arms and legs free. After that, the security guard left, leaving you alone with Toby.

"So, Tobias-"

"Toby."

"Uh, ok. Toby, do you mind telling me anything that's been on your mind recently."

"I w-would love to see a h-hachet right b-between your e-eyes!" Toby yelled, before breaking out into laughter.

You stared as Toby began to tic again, but this time it was more violent.

"Well, do you mind telling me a bit about what your life was like before this? Did you have any friends? Cause in your file it mentions a Brian and Tim."

"Those t-two aren't my friends. J-Just co-workers, well, f-former co-workers. I h-haven't talked to them s-since we got h-here, since w-we have to be s-separated."

"Are you lonely, Toby?"

Toby paused for a moment. His head looking down as he picked the skin of his fingers.

"Very."

"Is there anything I can do? Maybe make living here a bit more tolerable?"

"I want y-you to stay w-with me, f-forever..." Toby said, before grabbing the table.

"I'm sorry Toby, I can't do that... I'm sorry."

"But... YOU A-ASKED! Y-YOUR FUCKING L-LIAR! THESE BITCHES CLAIM THEY WANT TO HELP ME BUT THEY DON'T EVEN DO WHAT I WANT!" Toby yelled, him twitching before he slammed his hands on the table.

"Toby, I need you to calm down. I can't do what asked... I'm sorry..."

"Y-You don't want to help me... You o-only want the m-money," Toby said, his body twitching as he turned his head away.

"Toby, I want to help you! I'm being serious! Yes I need the money for me to live, but that's not the only reason why I'm here."

Toby glared at you twitching violently. You slowly pushed your chair back, only for Toby to start laughing.

"YOU'RE SCARED OF ME! YOU'RE SCARED! I CAN'T WAIT FOR ALL THE TIME WE'LL HAVE TOGETHER!" Toby yelled, before pouncing onto you.

"SE-" You began to yell, but Toby covered your mouth with his hand before whispering in you ear.

"Nobody will hear you screams... And when I'm done... You'll be nothing but a rotting corpse..."

Your eyes widened before you kneed Toby where the sun don't shine, only for him to stare at you. Luckily, you managed to get him off you and ran out.

"Take him back to his room... He's unstable... Really unstable..."

The security guard nodded before walking into the room and dragging out a restrained Toby. Toby glared at you with rage in his eyes.

When Toby was thrown into his cell you heard him screaming and begging to be let out. He begged and begged, and you almost went to unlock his cell, until the guard stopped you.

"He's manipulating you, don't let him. He'll stop once we leave."

You nodded at the two of you left, the 5th floor growing silent.

---------------------------------------

The next day, Miss. Gullermary told you had a therapy session with Brian. Miss. Gullermary warned you and told you he was one of the worse, so to be extra careful when dealing with him, and since he murdered his last physcologist with his bare hands just because they didn't call him 'Hoodie' was kinda scary.

When you went into the Therapy Room, you saw someone sitting down. His hands were cuffed and his eyes looked dead and emotionless.

You sat down in front of him as he looked up at you. He had a scruffy beard growing messy brown blondish hair.

"Hello, are you Brian?"

Nothing. He just stared at you.

"Uh... Do you go by any nicknames? Maybe alter egos or?"

"Hoodie."

"Uh... Ok, Hoodie, uh, are you enjoying your stay here?"

"Fuck no."

"As I thought... Uh, do you have any friends here?"

No reply, he just glared.

"Ok. Have you had anything on your mind recently? Any wants or depressive thoughts?"

"I want my clothes back."

"I don't think we can do that. Your file here says you came in with a yellow hoodie, jeans and a mask, those things can help people choke themselves or try escaping."

No response.

"Uh... Is there anything I can give you for you to make this a bit more tolerable?"

"I want a camera."

"A camera?"

Hoodie nodded.

"For what?"

"I want a camera."

"I'm sorry Hoodie but I can't just give you things without reason..."

"If you don't get me a goddamn camera you'll end up like that last one. Ripped to fucking shreds! You'll look like Jeff when I'm done with you..."

You froze in shock as you dropped his file onto the table. He was staring at you with a sinister grin on his face.

"So... How about that camera?"

"I-I'll.. talk to the director about it...."

"No one needs to know about this Doll... This can just be our little secret~"

"I can't lose my job Hoodie!"

"But will you not lose your job if they found out one of your patients tried to commit suicide because of you?"

"I..."

"Be a good girl/boy and get me that camera..."

You looked down to the ground as Hoodie smiled, his hands cuffed to the table.

"Times up!" The guard said as he walked.

Hoodie smirked as he was dragged away by the guard.

The words Good girl/boy ran in your head as it grew louder and louder.

Good girl/boy... Good Girl/Boy... GOOD GIR-/BO-

"Y/N?" The guard said, looking at your distressed state.

"Y-Yeah I'm fine."

You pulled out your journal and wrote 'Hoodie wants camera, TELL NO ONE. '

You left the room with your mind racing of so many thoughts. You knew you shouldn't listen to Hoodie, but something about him made your body stiff, made you want to hide and never be seen again.

-------------------------

"Today you'll be with Timothy. Be careful with him, he's unpredictable."

You nodded as you left Miss. Gullermary's office. Timothy's file was in your hands as you walked up to level 5. As you were walking to the therapy room, you saw Toby coloring in a coloring book, him twitching from time to time. By the look on his face he seemed distressed, and sad and on the verge of tears. You knocked on his window and waved at him. He looked up and waved back with red eyes. You wrote in your notebook to schedule a session with Toby later that day.

You opened the door of the therapy room and saw someone sitting down in chair. As you sat down in your chair you finally got a good look at it Timothy.

"Hello! Are you Timothy."

"Yeah, but I go by Tim, or Masky..." Tim said, running his hand through his hair as he bit his nails.

"Well, have you had anything on your mind recently."

"Why do you want to know?" Masky asked.

"Well, as your physcologist I want to make sure you get out of here and live a normal life."

Masky scoffed when you said ' Normal Life. '

"My life before this shit show was fine. I liked my life before I came here."

"Claiming to be a proxy of an urban legend shows signs of instability. I just want to help you."

"Whatever... Nothing has been on my mind, this place is boring as hell, and the people on this floor are a pain in my ass."

"Well... Do you have any friends here, or any people you talk to frequently?"

"I'm friends with Hoodie, but I haven't talked to him since we got here due to the bitches here saying we have to be separated. The only people I really talk to are Ben, Natalie and Jeff."

"Well, that's good to know you have people to talk to. Do you want anything to make life here more barrable?"

No response. He just stared at you with a smirk.

"Can it be anything?"

"Anything as long as the board approves of it."

"A lighter and pack of cigarettes."

"Cigarettes and a light? I know I can't do that. You can cause harm to the other paitents."

"I know you're giving Hoodie a camera and you're not telling the board, are you picking favorites?" Masky asked, grabbing your wrist.

"How did you..."

"How I know doesn't concern you. I'm not asking much, it's just cigarettes, can't handle a little bit of smoke doll?"

You turned your head to avoid his gaze, the nickname he gave you causing your anxiety go up to an unhealthy degree.

"Ok..."

"Great! Good to know we're on the same page doll!"

"Don't call me that, Timothy."

Masky stopped laughing and glared at you. A snarl on his face as he slapped you across the face, his eye twitching in frustration.

"You don't fucking call me that you bitch! YOU DON'T GET TO FUCKING CALL ME THAT!"

You froze as you backed away from the pissed off Masky. Next thing you knew a guard bursted in and dragged Masky away. You took a deep breath and exhaled to calm your nerves, you stood up and walked out of the room, going to Miss. Gullermary's office.

"Miss. Gullermary?"

"Yes, what do you want?"

"I'd like to schedule a session with Tobias after dinner."

"For what reason? Is it a concern."

"Well, yes. When I was going to have my session with Timothy, I saw him crying in his room while he was coloring."

"Fine."

You nodded before walking out, going down to your office on the main floor.

You sat down on your chair and looked over your notes, but you couldn't help but feel like you were being watched. In the corner of your eye you saw a tall white and black figure standing outside your window.

When you went to fully look at it, nothing was there.

"Y/N?" Someone outside your door said.

"Yeah?"

"I have your lunch," The voice said, opening the door.

The person who opened the door was a college friend of yours, Fern. Fern and you got the job together and have been really close.

"Oh thanks! I forgot it in the apartment..."

"No problem! Oh, and uh, don't forget to take your medicine to, you didn't take them yesterday or this morning."

"I know... But I don't fucking want to! Why do I need them anyways..."

"You said it yourself, it feels like everything before college doesn't exist. You said you don't remember your family, you only remember college. The pills are to help you cope, and you haven't been yourself recently."

"What do you mean?"

"You keep mumbling in your sleep about masked men, your anxiety has been getting worse, and you've been missing the past 7 therapy sessions."

"I'll go back to therapy when I want to."

"Y/N... I'm not messing around. I want you to get better, I want you to remember."

"I'm not messing around either! I can control my own life Fern!"

"Fine. Be like that."

Fern walked off as you stared at the pill bottle in your hand. You didn't understand why you needed it, you didn't understand anything! Ever since college you didn't really feel like a person. All the memories you once had, the memories who made you who were just vanished into thin air. You wanted to cry, hide even sometimes because you'd have nightmares of masked men you didn't even know!

A few hours past and your lunch still laid unopen on your desk with a bottle of pills next to it. Looking at the clock, you saw that dinner had just started and decided to go up to level 5.

You decided to go and actually get a good look at Toby's room. Using a key to open the door, you saw that his room was quite messy, and seemed to have been recognized. The bed was now in the corner of the room. You saw the pictures were all over his room, along with crayons and coloring books. Picking up one of the pictures, you saw a little doodle of you with a heart around, with the word mine around it with a doodle of Toby holding your hand.

You felt uncomfortable as you placed to photo down. You looked at the other photos and saw extremely gruesome photos, them getting more gruesome as you went on.

Looking into a one of the coloring books, you saw what looked like a diary entry.

"Day, whatever, fuck it I've lost count already. My beloved has once returned! They're so niave... They don't even remember us! Such a pity..."

You wondered who his beloved was, and you couldn't really get a guess because there was no date.

"Masky and Hoodie are so fucking mean to me! I can hear them through the walls, at lunch, everywhere, they keep making fun of me! The voices don't help, they're the only company I have and I keep hearing them yell bad yell about how pathetic I am! It's not my fault she died! IT'S NOT MY FAULT! FUCK HOODIE, FUCK MASKY, FUCK EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING IN THIS SHITTY PLACE! I'm going to hurt someone... I can't take this. The medication those stupid nurses gave me to help with disorders don't fucking cut it. I haven't taken them in the past month and I can actually think straight."

You knew this entry was probably from today.

"I can't wait to have my plaything back..."

You decided to close the coloring book and set it back down. You looked down at your watch and saw that lunch was over. So, you walked out of Toby's room and towards the Therapy Room.

You waited a few minutes and then you saw a very pissed off and messy Toby get pushes into a seat. When the guard left, Toby kept mumbling as he twitches uncontrollably, piling at his hair as his eyes twitched.

"Good evening Toby, how are you doing?"

"A-Awful," Toby said, his eyes starting to water as he pulled his hair harder.

"Toby, stop pulling at your hair you're gonna rip it out," You said, grabbing his hands and placing them on the table.

Toby twitched as blush went all over his face as he cried. You couldn't see the blush because his face was already red from crying.

"There. Now, what happened? You seemed to distressed today."

"Masky and Hoodie are so mean to me! They're always assholes to me! Masky keeps making fun of my tics at lunch and in his room and he knows I can hear him! Hoodie keeps ripping my drawing at lunch and throws them in the trash! Those drawings are the only thing preventing me from burning this place to the fucking ground!"

You were stunned, not only was your guess right, but Toby didn't stutter one bit. You knew he was upset, really fucking upset.

"I'm sorry to hear that Toby... Were they always like this?"

"Masky was... H-Hoodie didn't do much..."

"Well, how can I help?"

" Killing Masky and Hoodie."

"I can't do that Toby."

"Can you ask them to stop... They keep destroying my drawings, making fun of me and it hurts..."

"Ok, I'll try talking to them Toby."

Toby wiped his tears as you looked at you with smile. That moment have you a good look at his face. The right side of his mouth had stitches and his eyes were baggy and he looked tired. His hair was longer than in the picture and he was pretty pale.

Toby stood up and walked around the desk, making him pretty close to you. He grabbed your chin and kissed you. It wasn't loving, but more obsessive, hungry, desperate. When you tried to push him away, he only grabbed you harder and wrapped his hand around your throat.

You opened your eyes and saw him slowly take out a knife, he most likely stole it from lunch from the kitchen.

Panicking, you tried kicking and punching but it did nothing. Once his knife was out he stopped kissing you, his hand covering your mouth.

"I won't hurt you too much... I just want to punish you for leaving m-me... I mean, us..."

Toby moved the knife dangerous close to your eye before the door slammed open and he got tackled by a security guard.

"Miss Gullermary!" You said, standing up.

"One of the knives were missing a from the kitchen, and it seems like we found the culprit."

"G-Get Off me!" Toby yelled.

"No more coloring books for 3 months!"

"3 months?! Miss. Gullermary don't you think that's a it much? Can it just be two weeks?"

"Why?"

"All he can do is color! He has no friends here, please?"

"Fine."

Toby screamed as he was dragged away, his screams being heard from every corner.

____________________

A week passed and today you had a session with Hoodie. You hid the camera in your coat as you walked down the halls. When you opened the door, hoodie was there, sitting in a chair. You closed the door and sat down, staring at the man.

"Do you have my camera, doll?" Hoodie Said, A smile on his face.

"Yes..."You said, pulling it out from your coat.

"Good doll~ I knew you'd be good for me, such a good girl/boy..." Hoodie said, caressing your cheek as he took the camera.

"I have another request."

"No Hoodie, I'm not risking anymore for you!" You said, snapping back at him.

"I thought you were a good doll. Remember what I said doll, when I die you'll Be to blame. You'll have no job, all that college work was for nothing, you'll have nothing! And I know you don't want that."

"I can see through your lies Hoodie, you're trying to manipulate me to get what you want for whatever your planning! But listen, I'm not falling for it, do you understand?"

Hoodie chucked darkly as he grabbed your hair and pulled you onto the table.

"Such a disobedient whore, I thought you were going to behave. Well, I guess I'll have to punish you," Hoodie said, slowly putting his hand in your pants.

"S-Stop! Stop! Hoodie stop!" You kicked and punched him, but he only got more violent and rough.

"I'll do what you want! Just get off!" And then, everything was over. Your pants were off already, but Hoodie sat back down on his seat.

"Good girl/boy... Sadly, I really wanted to get fucked, it's been months. And keep the pants off."

You shakily sat back down looked at his with tears rolling down your face, your hands gripping onto your shoulders.

"W-What do you want..."

"A laptop."

"L-Laptop?"

"Yep. Can I get it? It can be another one of our secrets~"

"Fine..."

"What was that?"

"Ok."

"Atta girl/boy. Now I want it soon, I want it this week."

"O-Ok..."

Hoodie smirked as he hid his new camera into his hospital like gown. Hoodie stood up and walked out, being brought back to his room.

You slid down to the floor and cried. Your mind racing as blurry memories ran through your head. You heard screams, your screams, your cries. It scared you, memories you don't even remember flooding your head.

You stood up and walked out of the room, shaking and crying as you walked down the halls. When you were so close to the exit, you felt someone grab your hand. Looking over, you saw a black haired lady.

"U-Uh... Hello?"

"You're the newbie right? Sorry I didn't meet you earlier! I'm Jane."

"Y-Y/N..."

"I want to warn you of something, and I don't do this often..."

Suddenly, Jane grabbed your hand and pulled you infront of her.

"Meet me after work in the parking lot, I want to talk with you."

"How can I trust you?"

"I can't blame you if you don't. But, if you want answers, meet me after work."

Jane walked off, leaving you standing there to be in your own world of thoughts.

_________________________________________________

After work, you grabbed your jacket and your backpack full of various items. You walked out of the back door and saw Jane sitting on the sidewalk.

"I knew you'd show up. Come, sit down, it's pretty comfortable down here."

"What did you want to talk about?" You asked, sitting down next to Jane.

"You don't know the truth. There's holes in your memories, and I know why."

"You do?"

"They wiped most of your memories. You know those paitents you're assigned, Tobias, Timothy and Brian?"

"Yeah."

"They were your abusers. They abused you for around 8 years. They said they were in love with you, and when they were caught you were found. They wiped your memories, so you could live a normal life. The amount of trauma you had was too much.

"Why should I believe you?"

"I don't expect you to believe me, I'm just telling you how it is," Jane said, standing up and and fixing her coat.

"Well it was nice actually talking to you Y/N, but I have to deal with my most lunatic paitent Jeff."

"Ok, uh, see you around Jane!"

Jane turned around to look at you, before giving you a soft, pity filled, smile. You picked yourself up and walked towards your car, the words Jane said to you running through your head.

But, when you got to your car you saw a letter there, the handwriting was barely readable and it was childish looking almost.

"What the... Must be some trafficking thing," You muttered, before going into your car and driving off.

The next day at work was off, so to speak. Toby was a lot more anxious and even had a panic attack and nearly tried to choke you to death, yelling while tears swelled in his eyes about how he'll treat you so much better this time, before saying he'll make your life hell. Brian was alot more quiet and only asked for his mask back, and Tim just flat out ignored you.

You expressed your concerns to Miss. Gullermary, but she just ignored you. You had decided to take things into your own hands and talk with Toby to see if he knew anything.

"Hey Toby, how you feeling today?" You asked, sitting in front of Toby.

"Fucking terrible doc!" Toby said with an eerie smile on his face.

"You wanna talk about it?"

"I don't wanna take my meds, I don't wanna! it silences them... They make me feel not as lonely, BUT YOU GUYS TRY TO SILENCE THEM!"

"It's in order to help you Toby..."

"You always fucking say that... I don't care! It doesn't help me! Not even a little bit!"

"I'm... sorry."

"I don't care if you're sorry, the voices are already telling me what to do to you..."

"What are they saying?"

"If I tell you that you'll tell the old hag!"

"I swear on my life Toby, I won't tell her, I swear."

"They want me to fuck you... Fuck you until you can't even walk, talk... Breathe... Like how it used to be! But... You're just a bitch now... But I'll fix you..."

Toby blushed as his mind raced with so many dirty thoughts, his dick hard and him pulling in his hair to stay grounded. The whole thing made you uncomfortable.

"That's not a good thing Toby..."

"But you use to love it! Sure you'd fight me but you'll always be a moaning mess, you would beg me for more and to never stop..."

Suddenly your body started to shake, memories that were blurry raced through your mind, causing you to silently cry.

"Aw... It's ok, I'll make sure you get out here safely."

Suddenly, the alarms went off. Lights flashing, doors locking, gunshots being fired, and Toby holding you tightly.

"What... What did you do...,"

"Masky did this! Not Me! I'm taking you back home... You'll remember everything there..."

Toby slowly shoved his hand into your underwear before coving your mouth to silence your cries.

"But first... I want to remember how it feels to be inside you again...

[iam93percentstardust]

First of all, Happy Birthday Month!!! Many happy returns!! I have been reading fanfiction for e very long time, but this is the 1st time I have ever submitted a prompt. I kinda think Stuckony would be great but I am down with Winteriron or Stony, wherever the prompt takes you. You're amazing so I know it's gonna be fantastic! Thanks in advance!💜💜💜 “Is that your robot?” “That’s a rude way to talk about my husband.”

This was such a fun prompt to write, thanks for sending it in! And thank you for the birthday wishes!

As always, everything I write is also on ao3

~

Something taps against Bucky’s foot. At first, he ignores it, figuring someone just bumped into him, but then it happens again and then for a third time. He looks down, fully expecting to see a small child, only to see a small gold and blue robot run into his shoe, back up, and then run right into it again. It looks a little like an atom with a central core and three rings spinning around it in multiple directions. He smiles at the oddly charming behavior and bends down to pick the robot up, wondering if it came from one of the many glittering exhibits he and Steve have walked past today or if it belongs to someone.

“Hey, Stevie,” he begins, thinking to share it with his husband, but when he looks around, Steve isn’t anywhere near him. Bucky sighs and turns in a circle, hoping to spot him somewhere in the packed crowd. Who knew the Stark Expo would draw so many people on a Tuesday in the middle of March? “Stevie, you’re too small to wander off like this.”

He feels a tug on the hem of his coat and then a small voice primly says, “Excuse me, Mister Sir, that’s mine.”

“Huh?” He looks down again, this time to see a young girl of about six or seven years holding onto his jacket. “Oh! Is this your robot?” he asks, crouching down to her level.

“That’s a rude way to talk about my husband,” she informs him, holding her hand out for the robot.

Bucky blinks at her. He’s heard about kids playing pretend with their toys but that’s usually things like Legos or dolls, right? Not a whirring, circular robot that doesn’t even have a face.

“Can I please have Jarvis back?” the girl asks, insistently tugging on his coat again.

“Oh, sure, sorry about that.” He passes it back to her and then looks around, hoping to spot the girl’s parents before she realizes she’s left them. He’s dealt with plenty of upset kids at the school he and Steve work at, so he’s more than capable of handling any meltdown she might have, but he’d like to stave it off if he can. Unfortunately, he doesn’t spot anyone frantically looking for a lost kid, so he’s just getting ready to resign himself to dealing with a crying kid when Steve appears from out of nowhere.

“Hey, Buck, sorry about that, got sidetracked by one of the exhibits. The person works with sand and sound to make art, it was really—” He stops short at the sight of the girl hugging her robot. “Bucky. You didn’t pick up another stray, did you?”

“Excuse me?” Bucky asks, affronted. “I never—”

“No? So what’s Alpine then? Or Dodger? Or, for that matter, me?” Steve crouches down next to the girl and holds out his boney hand for her to shake. “Hey, kid, my name’s Steve. This is Bucky. What’s your name?”

She gives him a suspicious look, but must decide that he’s safe because she says after a moment, “Morgan.”

“Well, Miss Morgan, why don’t we see about finding your parents?” Steve offers. “It looks like they’ve gotten lost.”

Morgan turns one way and then the other, noticing for the first time that she’s alone. Her lower lip trembles, eyes welling up with big, fat tears. “I—”

Bucky, sensing an impending meltdown, quickly says, “Hey, it’s okay. We’ll find them. We grown-ups are pretty good at getting lost. It’s up to brave kids like you to help us get found again.”

Morgan sniffs, but nods. “I’m here with Uncle Happy,” she says, sliding her small hand into Bucky’s.

“Then let’s find Uncle Happy,” Steve says decisively. “Would you like me to hold your robot?”

She shakes her head, clutching the robot tighter to her. “You can’t take JARVIS,” she says. “He’s mine.”

“Okay,” Bucky says soothingly. “We won’t take him away.” He shares a quick glance with Steve. “Should we start at Lost and Found?”

“If I may, Sirs,” the robot suddenly says in a cool British voice. Steve yelps, jumping away from it. Bucky startles, dropping Morgan’s hand.

Morgan giggles. “Don’t worry, that’s just Jarvis. He’s an artificial intelligence.” She pronounces the words carefully, like it’s something she’s been taught to say. She holds the robot up, who lights up with every word he says.

“The tracker in this device has been activated. There will be no need to move from this location. Sir will be here momentarily,” Jarvis tells them.

“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph,” Steve mutters, taking a closer look at the robot. “It talks.”

“I am Just A Rather Very Intelligent System or—”

“JARVIS,” Bucky realizes. “It’s an acronym, not a name.”

“Quite so, though I was named for Edwin Jarvis, an old friend of Sir’s.”

“And Sir is…?”

JARVIS lights up like it’s going to talk again but before it says anything, they hear someone say loudly, “Morgan H. Stark!”

Morgan’s face brightens and she turns, running right into the arms of a slender man in a suit, closely followed by another larger man. “Daddy!” she exclaims, throwing her arms around the man, who catches her up in a tight hug.

“What have we said about running off?” the man asks, sounding worried. He has a familiar voice, Bucky thinks. He wonders where he’s heard it before.

“I didn’t run off,” Morgan protests. “JARVIS did and I had to get him.”

“You didn’t think to tell Happy where you were going?” The man gently brushes her hair out of her eyes before straightening up, setting Morgan on his hip.

“I didn’t have time! JARVIS was moving too fast.”

The man makes a dissenting noise. “Flaw in your logic.”

She shakes her head. “No flaw.”

“Yes flaw. JARVIS has a tracker. You, O’ Great and Powerful Maguna, do not.”

It’s adorable watching the two of them together, seeing the way the man softens the longer he holds Morgan and the way Morgan leans into him. And it doesn’t hurt that the man is wildly attractive too: all big brown eyes and curly hair that Bucky wants to feel between his fingers (he bets they’re as soft as they look). Bucky feels something stir in his heart that he hasn’t felt since the day he met Steve. He quickly glances at Steve, wondering if Steve feels the same way. Steve’s eyes could practically be cartoon hearts, he’s melting so obviously, and Bucky smiles to himself. Maybe, if they play their cards right…

“But I didn’t get lost,” Morgan protests and points at Bucky and Steve. “I had Mister Bucky and Mister Steve.”

Abruptly, all the warmth drains out of the man’s expression. He looks at Bucky and Steve coldly, mouth a thin, tight line. “Oh you did, did you?” He turns to the second man behind him. “Happy, could you take Morgan for a moment?”

“Daddy—” But Happy—who looks more like an Angry than a Happy—has already nodded and taken her from the man’s arms.

“You got it, boss.”

The man now stalks closer to Bucky and Steve. “Alright,” he says abruptly. “How much do I owe you?”

Steve’s expression goes blank. “I’m sorry?” he repeats, voice tense with hidden anger.

“What do you want for this?” the man says. “Finder’s fee, something to keep you quiet, what do you want?”

“Look, I don’t know who you think you are—” Steve begins heatedly, right as Bucky realizes where he’s seen this man before.

“Stevie, stop,” he mutters, catching Steve’s arm before he can get too angry and take a swing at the guy. “That’s Tony Stark.”

“Huh?” Steve looks again and then his face clears. “Oh. This must happen a lot, huh?”

Stark glances between the two of them, looking confused now, rather than angry. That’s good; that’s something Bucky can work with.

“Look, we’re sorry about all this,” Bucky says apologetically. “But we’re really not trying to cause trouble. Morgan’s robot ran into my foot, that’s how we met. We didn’t even know who she was until you got here. You don’t need to pay us off or anything.”

“Really,” Stark states suspiciously. “So I’m not going to wake up tomorrow and all the headlines are saying that I can’t take care of my kid?”

“We’re both teachers,” Steve says, gesturing at him and Bucky. “We know kids wander off all the time. They’re more slippery than a bar of soap in the shower. You’re not going to hear anything from us.”

Stark slumps and runs a hand through his hair. He looks tired all of a sudden, not that Bucky can blame him now that he knows this entire Expo is being run by him. “Sorry,” he says quietly. “You just can’t be too careful in this line of business.”

“I can imagine,” Bucky says soothingly. “If it would help, we’d be happy to sign an NDA.”

“Pepper would probably kill me if I didn’t ask you to,” Stark admits. He sighs. “Great, first time I contact her since the divorce and it’s about my fuckup.”

“You’re not a fuckup,” Steve insists. “Seriously, this happens all the time. Just last week, I had a kid decide he wanted to keep looking at the snails in the Botanical Gardens we took the kids to while the rest of us went to lunch. Took me an hour to find him.”

Tony gives him a hopeful look. “Really?”

“Really. It’s okay. You’re not a bad parent.”

“I’ve just—I’m supposed to be presenting in—” He checks his watch.

Happy shouts, “Five minutes ago, boss.”

“It’s my presentation, I think they can wait for me if I’m running late. Morgan didn’t want to wait while I was prepping so I asked Happy to take her to see some of the exhibits. I didn’t think she’d wander away.”

“Well, hey, we’d hate to make you any later,” Bucky says. “So we’ll let you—”

Morgan pipes up, “Daddy, can’t Mister Bucky and Mister Steve come too?”

“Well—”

“They were so nice,” she says, making her eyes big and wide. “And I think we should be nice and let them watch.”

Stark smiles helplessly at her. “You know what that is? That’s extortion.” He turns to Bucky and Steve again and shrugs. “Do you want to come? It’ll be backstage, so you won’t get to see as much as you would if you were watching from the front. But it’ll be fun, I’m presenting the new arc reactor. Oh—and please, call me Tony. We’re all friends here, no need to stand on formalities.”

Steve and Bucky have one of their silent conversations that always bothers their friends. “Are you sure?” Steve asks. “We wouldn’t want to be a bother.”

Tony gives Bucky a very obvious onceover, followed by a look at Steve, just as obvious and just as hungry. “Oh yes,” he murmurs. “I’m sure.”

“Then we’d love to,” Bucky says, giving Tony a onceover of his own. He and Steve don’t often invite a third partner to their bed, but there’s just something about Tony.

“Great!” Tony chirps. His eyes go dark and heated as he adds, “And maybe afterwards, we can talk about a way to pay you back for helping Morgan out.”

“Tony, really, we don’t need anything,” Steve begins.

“Please,” Tony purrs. “I insist.”

[j-wont-stop]

Mary Mary (Chapter Two)

Title - Mary Mary (Chapter Two)

Word Count - 1063

Fandom - The Umbrella Academy

Pairing - Five Hargreeves x OC

Summary - October 1st, 1989. Forty-Three infants were born to women with no previous signs of pregnancy. It was also the day of four-year-old Mariana Polakoff’s death. The world carried on, her mother being the only one left to grieve. But on one miraculous day, the little girl was spotted. But she was not how the world remembered her.

Warning(s) - Near sexual assault

Inspiration - I Just Died In Your Arms (Hidden Citizens)

A/N - This is set after season two, but instead of the Sparrow Academy appearing, everything is back to normal. Five is also physically 22 for reasons later on in the story.

Soft chattering filled the room, glass clinking together and silverware scraping against dishes sounding in the background. She stared at the glass of water that sat in front of her, the ice cubes and vibrant slice of lemon floating delicately, timelessly. A hand reached her field of view to set down a plate of fish and chips. She looked up at the waiter and he offered a smile, but all he received was a glare through her lashes in return. The faint red hue that surrounded her eye sockets just added to the level of discomfort he felt and a chill ran down his spine. He didn't show his discomfort until he turned away, too frightened to even risk offending her somehow.

She continued to stare at the man conversing with who she assumed was his mother that worked the counter. The woman's face flushed when she noticed the girl still staring at them, feeling a sense of relief once she turned to her food.

"So judgmental." Dascal commented from beside her.

"It's quite intriguing." She spoke softly as she started to pick at her food, the door to the diner chiming. He raised a brow in question. "Most people barely know themselves, yet spend so much time on others."

"Well you're not wrong, dear one." Mary chuckled. "Humored?"

"By them." Dascal nodded in agreement, letting out a few chuckles of his own.

"It seems you have an admirer." Without looking up, the used to be child let a faint smile reach her lips, but it was deceitful.

"It would seem so." She mumbled and raised her head just enough to meet with another set of eyes. Icy blue met with emerald green, almost challenging each other. She felt a sudden rush of emotions, but they were not her own. It felt as if she was existing as two different people simultaneously, yet still had superior control over her own. First it was surprise, followed by curiosity and suspicion. However, when she looked away it all disappeared. As if a blanket had been ripped from her body. She hummed in her own sense of curiosity as she cleaned her hands with a napkin to place the cash on the table.

"Hungry?" The goat mused as Mary brushed out her dress after standing from her seat. She clicked her tongue before making her way towards the door, catching the stranger's eyes once more as she exited the building.

The dim lamp posts were all that lit the streets, and even then it was still hard to see with how dark it was. They had only passed another person every now and then. It seemed out of character for the city compared to how busy it was during the day. Yet she felt something, someone. Except there was no one in sight other than Dascal.

"Calm, dear one. They feed on fear."

"Like yourself?"

"Indeed." Dascal glanced to his right into an alleyway and guided Mary into the abyss. The two of them came to a halt when they heard echoed footsteps that were not their own.

"You know, it's impolite to stalk." Mary spoke out. A raspy chuckle followed her confrontation. The footsteps grew closer, as did the hoofed man beside her. His large hand protectively rested on her upper back. When she turned around she was met with a scruffy looking man, appearing much older with his greying hair that had started to bald. She held his hazy gaze as he crept closer.

"What's a pretty little thing like yourself doing out here?" He slurred. He attempted to corner her, but when he started to get too close she put a hand to his chest to stop him. Her nose scrunched up when he bit his lip. "I sure do like em' feisty." He went to grab her wrist, but as soon as he made contact he stilled.

His eyes widened and time seemed to slow, his breath caught in his throat. Slowly his veins protruded from his skull, swelling with blood as his face reddened. Terror was all that was left in his eyes. The woman watched in curiosity and slight amusement.

"Dascal?"

"Perhaps this is a-" He was cut off when the two of them heard a 'clang', then the man collapsed onto the ground. Mary held an expression of disgust as she brushed off the wrist her attacker had grabbed, then looked up to see the stranger from the diner. Said stranger huffed and looked at Mary incredulously.

"You're welcome." Mary quirked a brow at the man.

"Is he dead?" She questioned. Now it was his turn to raise a brow.

"Clearly not." He motioned to the breathing man as if it was the most obvious thing.

"Then I'm not thankful." Mary stepped around the scene to make her journey back to the apartment, Dascal following behind the stranger in case he decided to try anything.

"Not thankful? When he was about to do who-knows-what to you?"

"He wasn't going to do anything because he would've been dead." They made their way into the old apartment building, an orchestra of creaks sounding from the stairs as they all made their way up to the second floor.

"And how would that be? You couldn't even get him off of your own wrist."

"What is it with you all being so judgmental?" Mary mumbled as she unlocked the door to her room. She stepped inside before turning to face the slim man. "Goodnight."

Once the door was locked Mary made her way to the bedroom. There was already a set of pajamas already sprawled out on the twin bed and she smiled.

[randomsevans]

Lover

Steve Roger's x Reader

A/n I might do another version of this . Since it wasnt what I planned for this song but I came out this way anyway . I like the story but I have another one in mind of this song

Remember to send in a song request along with a character ❤

Requested by @donutloverxo

We could leave the Christmas lights up 'til January

This is our place, we make the rules

And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you, dear

Have I known you twenty seconds or twenty years?

Its hasn't quite been twenty seconds or twenty year . But long enough for me and steve to finally get our place together. We havnt been here long late August. And our little nest has already seen the change of season quite quickly with as soon as September rolled around the Halloween decorations were up. It didnt take much convincing since steve loved the holiday.

But as 31st of October past and November the 1st came forward I knew my work was cut out of me .

" please stevie . Pretty please " I said looking up wrapped up in his arms on the stairs giving my best puppy dog eyes .

"No . It ain't gonna work " steve shut his eyes shaking his head trying to avoid your eyes

"But .... please "

"No doll . The boxes are going up and nothing it coming down . No Santas or reindeer until the 1st of December " steve said sternly

"But that agesssss a way "I whined like a kid . What can I say I love Christmas well any holiday really

Steve took a deep breath and step away from me . Picking up the box on the floor filled with skulls ,bones and black and orange decor .he began to clime the ladder to the loft whispering to himself "no happening. Not happening. It was literally Halloween yesterday "

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out, and take me home

You're my, my, my, my lover

As I stood there staring at the ground waiting for steve . I knew he wouldnt let me put the decorations up . I mean it November shops are selling Christmas stuff why cant I put it up ! I'm not waiting a month ! I softly yet firmly stamped my foot like a child . Quickly glancing up to see if steve notice he doesnt like it when I'm a brat . But what do u expect me to be like when I want Christmas and his been a grinch .

Yet I couldn't find it in me to be angry with him . His been so patient he waited months for me to finally agree to a date and then took things slow with me . But when one night randomly in his room he said he wanted a place of our own . I freaked out and avoided him for days until we talked and he said he was happy for to wait for me to make a decision . It didnt take me long tho . I knew steve was the one . He will always be my lover . That's why I dont think I wanted to rush things but to make them perfect . But the thought of a place all mine and steve warned my heart I couldn't wait. I ran into the compand kitchen one day shouting 'yes ' everyone thought we were gonna get married . But no I said yes to a place of our own , where the walls would have our favourite colour and our pictures. Decorations when ever I want . Apparently not

We could let our friends crash in the living room

This is our place, we make the call

And I'm highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you

I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all

Its wasnt until a heavy box fell at my feet with a thud that I snapped out of my thoughts looking down untill u saw the red tinsel picked out . I smile creeped on my face. Growing as I turned my head towards steve who was at the bottom of the ladder showing of his muscles as he held a larger box on his shoulder . With a final creek he was at the bottom and turned to face me . He had a frown on his face as he was clearly trying to hid his smile . He left the box on the ground and grabbed you with full force you fell over my own feel and right into his chest . His arms circled around me.

"Let's make one thing clear " Steve slowly said as his blue ocean eyes glance into mine ."this ..." he pointed to the boxes "is only happening ... this early ... because it our first Christmas here "

"Yes sir " I said happily bouncing quite literally up and down with a wide smile on my face untill I was pushed all of a sudden to the wall behind me

"What the h..."

"What did you just call ?" Steve voice was stern yet playful .

"Umm " my throat all of a sudden become very dry

"Now what do you say and say it right " steve soft eyes where a contrast to his voice . It's one of the many things you love about your lover for the last three years . Mainly why you will alway want to be with this man .its always somthing I know alot of people would want and do want . Even after three year and a house with the ring hidden in his drawers I cant help but still feel like he doesn't actually want me because I know everyone falls to his feet so why pick me . But the though went as quickly as it came as I feel Steve's lips getting closet to mine .

"Ummm thank you captain "

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out, and take me home (forever and ever)

Steve quickly pulled away just before our lips met .

"Come on then " the bastard had a smirk on his face as he looked down at him .I just hummed as a reply pissed of with me . "Dont you want to to decorate " he bend his neck till he was eye level with me and did a playful pout . I quickly nodded and zoomed off to get a box .

You're my, my, my, my lover

Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?

With every guitar string scar on my hand

I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover

My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

All's well that ends well to end up with you

Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover

And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me

And at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover

The sky had turned black as me and steve finally sat down with a cup of hot chocolate for both of us . Mine with mashmalls of course. I sighted finally relaxing. I glanced around the room. Seeing the tall tree and the red and gold decor every way.

"Thank you stevie " I spoke softly

"No thank you doll "

My brows raised as I turned to face the handsome super solider "what for ... you spend your day of helping me take down and put decorations "

"That I did love ... but maybe next time you shouldn't let me have so much control over where to put put them " steve said as he leaned toward and took my hot chocolate out of mine hand . He slightly titled his head up with a devilish smirk . I followed his eye light . Untill I saw a mistletoe hanging down . I small chuckle left his lips and he came closer to me. "It is traditionally after all "

A small smirk was now placed on my face as I quickly got up and ran to the kitchen "not quite yet lover boy " I giggled

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out, and take me home (forever and ever)

You're my, my, my, my

Oh, you're my, my, my, my

Darling, you're my, my, my, my lover

His laughter boomed though out the halls as he slowly made his way towards me . "Ohh really " he cockly said as he point above me once again. My heart sank as I looked up and saw yet another mistletoe.

"Oh you think your so clever dont you?"

"You know it darling " he quickly stood in front of me with his hand framing my face and his lips touched my softly .

I softly sighed as we parted I must of looked pissed or sad or angry because Steve's face quickly become worried. "What's the matter doll . I'll take them down if you.."

"No ...no " I quickly said

"Then what is it ?"he softly asked his hands moving to my waist .

"Can we stay this close forever " I closed my eyes . Untill I heard a chuckle

"Forever and ever my lover , "

"Really " I looked up wide eyed .

"Of couse if you'll have me that is ?" He looked a bit scared untill I placed a small peck on his pout .

"Why wouldn't I? Your my lover "