#it's projecting on my blorbos o'clock | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tboybuck · 1 year

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woke up thinking about this post and now i have to project on my blorbos a little bit cw: bullying, homophobia, mention of parent death

steve is in the first grade when he first becomes aware of eddie munson. it's a friday, which means he's in chapel alongside all the other students at st matthew's, but this morning is different. this morning they're doing a dress rehearsal for the second graders' first communion this weekend. there's a long line of them, right up the center aisle of the chapel in alternating boy-girl order, and everybody is watching them.

most of the second graders are doing just what they should; standing with their shoulders back, hands in front of them in prayer position, awaiting their turn to get to the front of the sanctuary and take the eucharist from father hyde.

there's one boy, though, who can't seem to stand still.

ants in his pants, as steve's mother would say. and that's no good for chapel, for mass this weekend when the boy will take the holy sacrament for the first time.

he's a little smaller than the rest of his grade, scrawny almost. his hair's a mop of unruly dark curls and he's got big brown eyes that take up most of his face. his faded trousers are an inch or so too short, showing off a strip of white sock beneath. steve's father would have never let him out of the house showing white sock beneath black trousers. the boy's belt is tightened to the very last hole.

sister ignatius hovers behind the boy, just to his right, with her severe brow pulled into a scowl and her long wooden ruler clutched in her hand.

"munson better cool it," tommy whispers at steve's side. "sister ignatius is gonna get him with that ruler of hers."

but eddie munson can't stand still, and he doesn't even get to father hyde before he catches sister ignatius' ruler across the thigh. he looks like his eyes might be welling with tears after she does it, but he stills, and he forces his body to remain as still as possible until the dress rehearsal is through

when steve is in the fourth grade, he's chosen to play joseph in st matthew's nativity play. eddie munson - still wild, still scrawny, still incapable of being still or quiet for more than a couple of minutes at a time - has for some godawful reason been chosen as the angel gabriel.

eddie munson doesn't take anything seriously, and the nativity play is no different. during practice and rehearsal, sister ignatius has to chase him all throughout the sanctuary while he dives beneath pews and hides under the altar and inside the hollow back of the pulpit.

steve thinks eddie munson is too old to be acting like this.

when the day finally comes, though, and they perform the nativity, munson delivers. for all the screwing around he did at practice and rehearsal, he really comes through and he shines as gabriel.

he's a touch dramatic, and his voice carries a little further than the rest of them, but there's a man and a woman in the second row of pews that smile at eddie like he is the star of both of their entire worlds as he takes a bow at the end.

the woman is young, her eyes big and dark in the same way eddie munson's are, her hair big and dark and curly. eddie's mother, for sure. the man at her side, though... that's not eddie's dad. steve's not sure how he knows it, but he does.

eddie is scooped into a hug by his mother when all is said and done, and the man at her side lays a companionable hand atop his head.

it's the happiest steve has ever seen eddie munson. the calmest, the most grounded.

steve is in the sixth grade when he watches eddie munson get expelled from st matthews.

he heard through the grapevine that eddie's mom died over the summer. he doesn't know the specifics but munson was out of school a lot last spring. they're not friends, barely even acquaintances, so steve doesn't offer any empty condolences when he sees eddie in the hallway between classes their first day back in the fall.

by the end of the week everything falls to shit.

steve's got no idea what or who started it, but when he comes across the scene in the hallway there are three boys surrounding eddie munson. they have eddie on his knees. one boy has a hand fisted in eddie's hair, pulling his head back at an uncomfortable angle, and the two other boys are taking turns hitting him.

the boys are using words that steve has never heard before.

fag. queer. cocksucker.

eddie munson's mouth is bleeding. there's nothing behind his eyes. he looks numb, almost dead himself. the boy holding munson down tightens his hand in his hair and pulls back again.

he says to eddie, "good thing your mom died before she found out what kinda faggot her kid is, huh?" and for the briefest moment, steve sees a flash of fire in his eyes.

and then eddie spits in the face of his attacker. he sprays blood across the other boy's face and all three of them go very very still before dropping eddie in a heap on the ground and running off to find an adult.

steve considers going to eddie, helping him up off the hallway floor, but eddie munson levels him with a hard stare and says, "fuck off."

eddie doesn't come back to st matthews after that, and over the next few years steve begins to hear rumors about him; he worships the devil, he's dealing drugs. he's gay.

in the spring of '86, when steve pulls on eddie's battle vest in the hazy nightmare of the upside down, there's a rosary in the pocket.

#bee's blurbs #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things fic #character study #it's projecting on my blorbos o'clock

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baggebythesea · 2 years

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Any advice for when you get burnout for a fic

Right now my creative energies want to do kingdom hearts stuff then she ra stuff

That's rough. The answer I want to give is 'follow your passion'. If you want to do kingdom heart's stuff, then it's fucking kingdom heart's o'clock! But it depends on several factors.

First of all, is this a question about burnout for a specific fic, or is a question about overall low creative energies? Because if it is, then the answer is - be kind to yourself, allow yourself not to be productive for a while. Here you have to know yourself. I know authors who only work in rabid frenzy every second month or so, while others steadily types away a hundred words a day. Sometimes you have outside stuff that requires your time, attention and mental capacity, sometimes you're just low on energy because fuck knows why. Either way, there will be days or weeks or months where you produce very little, and that's when you remind yourself that this is a hobby and that your story will be here for you whenever you comes back to it. Lean into it! Take a few days when you only do non-productive parts of fandom. Read without commenting. Watch without taking notes for fics. Scroll through social media without reblogging. Just be a watcher for awhile when you recharge.

If it is a question about your growing tired of that one specific fic, the next chapter is tedious and that sweet, sweet scene you are working towards seems ever so far away, while all the time the muse of a new Blorbo whispers sweet words of honey in your ear… well, again, you have to know yourself. I know authors who juggle twenty different projects at the same time, always ready to drop them and pick up a new ball, but somehow often managing to come back to them. I also know authors who are mortally afraid of abandoning a WIP for fear that they will never return to it. An ongoing longfic might be different than a series of oneshots. I can't really advice you there, you'll have to know - or figure out - your own attitude. But if you think you might be able to return to your current fic, then there is little harm in following the path of your current muse for a little while. Remind yourself of the burning passion you feel when you get into a new fandom and there are so many stories you haven't yet written. I'm sure there are little tricks. Pick a date when you will return to your current fic. Clear time in the schedule. Force yourself to write just one paragraph for it for each shortfic you write for your new fandom. Honestly, I don't know. Again, different authors are very different in this regard.

Also worth reminding - sometimes we never come back to our stories, and that's OK. If you want, you might write a 'placeholder' ending just to get it out of your system. If you haven't returned to your story in a year you can post it and call it quits. Or, who knows, five years from now you might find the inspiration hitting again.

Be kind to yourself, follow your passion but keep a strategic eye on your larger wips. Oh, and have fun. Always have fun in fandom.

#writer's corner

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