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melanielocke · 3 years

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Lost in the Shadows - Chapter 9

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Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Taglist: @nott-the-best @foxglove-airmid @alastair-esfandiyar-carstairs1 @justanormaldemon @styxdrawings @ipromiseiwillwrite

Curious question: why do you think the creature Benedict owed a debt to chose Jesse over Thomas?

‘Why is Mario Kart so difficult?’ Cordelia groaned.

‘It’s not difficult, you just need to play more often,’ Lucie said.

Alastair and Cordelia hadn’t really grown up playing video games, and Lucie had discovered both sucked at playing Mario Kart. Lucie was typically more of a Legend of Zelda fan, but they couldn’t play that together, so she’d suggested Mario Kart instead.

They spent most of their time in and around the house, taking the occasional walk. Lucie hadn’t seen Jesse again, despite searching for him, nor had they gotten any closer to discovering what was going on. They’d visited the ruins of a castle nearby one day, but it hadn’t worked as a distraction. Steve’s body had been found and the lake was open for swimming again, but Lucie wasn’t sure she wanted to. What had happened to the child could easily happen to them.

‘I don’t think I’ll ever get good at this,’ Cordelia said as she drove her kart of the track again.

If anything, Lucie was glad to be able to spend more time with Cordelia, even under such circumstances. Lucie still had no plan on how to tell Cordelia how she really felt, but then neither did Thomas have one for Alastair despite their daily walks and obvious affection on Alastair’s side. Alastair was mostly with the Lightwoods, trying to get into Gideon’s memory and find out what Benedict really had been up to.

‘This is nothing. James and I used to play Mario Kart on the wii and I think that version of Rainbow Road is the most difficult track they ever made.’

‘I don’t think I want to know,’ Cordelia announced.

Cordelia checked her phone once they’d finished the race and scrolled through several messages.

‘Alastair said they haven’t figured out yet what creature Benedict made a deal with, but Thomas went into the village to the grocery store and there he saw his aunt Tatiana,’ Cordelia said.

Lucie checked her phone for any additional messages, but she’d received the same messages. Thomas apparently had made a Whatsapp group titled ‘Making sure I don’t die’ where they were writing out all the information they had. He’d made a secondary group called ‘spam’ without their parents in there where they could talk about things that weren’t essential or make plans, to keep the other group clean. Lucie guessed that made sense. Cordelia changed the name of the first group to “Essential information to save Thomas”.

‘That’s a better name,’ Lucie commented out loud.

‘Exactly,’ Cordelia said. ‘Now we have one place we dump all useful information and can easily find everything, with a fitting name.’

‘I wonder why Tatiana would be here,’ Lucie said. ‘Thomas seeing her and Jesse appearing after years, that can’t be a coincidence. Perhaps Jesse is wherever she’s staying, perhaps there I could talk to him.’

‘Would she let you in though?’ Cordelia asked.

‘Probably not,’ Lucie said, but she had an idea. ‘We could break in.’

‘We don’t even know where she’s staying,’ Cordelia pointed out. ‘That is a terrible idea.’

‘Uncle Gideon is looking into where she’s staying right now,’ Lucie said. ‘Perhaps if he finds out where she is, we can go take a look. In the meantime though…’

‘Please no more Mario Kart,’ Cordelia begged.

Lucie ended up introducing Cordelia to Legend of Zelda after all, opting to watch her play through the beginning of Breath of the Wild. It was clear Cordelia wasn’t used to gaming at all, but she did seem to enjoy it, even if she fell off several cliffs and died a few times because she didn’t remember in time which button was for attacking.

Lucie regularly checked her phone, until Thomas texted her his father had returned, and had found Tatiana. Apparently she was staying at a hotel, but had gotten very angry when she’d seen her brother. Lucie wondered if she knew they were all staying here. It seemed too much of a coincidence.

She googled the hotel Thomas had named and realized she’d seen it on the drive here. There was a restaurant downstairs, and Lucie figured that might be a way in. They had several vegan options too. If she and Cordelia had dinner there, they might be able to sneak inside the hotel itself. Getting inside a room without making too much noise could prove challenging though. Although Cordelia carried cortana and that sword was said to be able to cut through anything. Perhaps she could cut into a lock. That’d be suspicious when Tatiana found out, but she didn’t know about cortana, did she?

‘I have a plan,’ Lucie announced. ‘We’re going to have dinner at the restaurant of the hotel Tatiana is staying.’

‘Do you think Jesse will show up in the middle of a restaurant?’ Cordelia asked.

‘Not really,’ Lucie said. ‘But from there we can sneak into the hotel, and break into Tatiana’s room.’

Cordelia frowned. ‘And if we get caught? We could get in serious trouble.’

Lucie had to admit Cordelia had a point. Neither of them were skilled at breaking in.

‘If we’re only in the corridor, we could always say we got lost,’ Lucie speculated.

‘I’m not so sure they would believe me,’ Cordelia said. ‘Although if you go without me, perhaps you could claim you were looking for a bathroom. Still, going there without actually breaking in anywhere might be a good idea to get a sense of the place, see if anything unusual is going on simply because Tatiana’s there.’

Lucie understood why Cordelia wasn’t willing to take such risks, they were a lot less likely to believe she’d simply gotten lost as a woman of color. She had to admit, her plan was a bit reckless, so perhaps it was a good thing Cordelia was here to talk some sense into her. Still, Lucie was determined to find a way to speak to Jesse. Who knew, maybe he would show up at the restaurant if his mother was there. Or perhaps not, perhaps he haunted the woods instead. Ghosts were nothing if not inconsistent.

‘Good point,’ Lucie said. ‘I don’t think my mother would be very happy if we broke in either.’

‘Alastair would murder us,’ Cordelia added.

‘Good thing he’s with Thomas,’ Lucie said, and she texted to Thomas that he should invite Alastair over for dinner. Lucie wasn’t so sure he would without some encouragement even if he very much wanted Alastair to stay.

Lucie wondered if Thomas was making any progress with him, perhaps that was difficult considering the circumstances. On the other hand, if Lucie had learnt anything from her favorite books was that a crisis was the perfect time to find love. What could possibly be more romantic than Alastair saving Thomas’ life? Lucie thought for a moment and then texted Thomas again.

Lucie: Have you kissed him yet?

Thomas: No, of course not. I don’t even know if he likes me!!!

Lucie: You could ask.

Lucie knew she was being hypocritical, she hadn’t yet told Cordelia how she felt about her. However, Thomas’ chances with Alastair were much better than her chances with Cordelia. Alastair was openly gay and Lucie had caught him staring at Thomas with both affection and desire.

Thomas: How am I supposed to do that???

Thomas: I did invite him over for dinner though. He accepted and my parents are very happy that he did.

Lucie: Time to make your move (;

‘Alastair is staying with Thomas for dinner,’ Lucie said.

‘I’m glad they’re spending time together,’ Cordelia said. ‘Alastair has so few friends. For most of his life he only knew how to antagonize people or push them away.’

‘Yes, he and Thomas seem to like each other,’ Lucie said. ‘Alastair broke up with his boyfriend not so long ago, right?’

‘He did, but maybe don’t mention that in his presence,’ Cordelia said. ‘It was a very bad and unhealthy relationship and Alastair is still struggling with coming to terms with that. He doesn’t often want to talk about it, and only on his terms.’

Lucie imagined that might make it more difficult for him and Thomas. In her favorite books, a good relationship usually fixed any trauma from a previous bad one, but she knew that in real life that wasn’t the case. Of course, in books it wasn’t uncommon for the new “better” relationship to still be pretty toxic, with the main difference that it was unintentional on the author’s part and therefore never acknowledged.

Lucie herself had made such mistakes in her own stories before, writing relationships she later realized were very toxic. In her early teens people would always tell her boys were mean to her because they liked her and she’d believed that until she’d discussed that with her mother, who disagreed.

‘I’m sorry that happened to him,’ Lucie said.

‘Yes, me too,’ Cordelia said. ‘Wait, do you think Alastair likes Thomas? Is that why you keep trying to get them to spend time together?’

‘At least I think they would be good friends, since they have such similar interests,’ Lucie said. ‘But it’s definitely possible Alastair likes Thomas. I wouldn’t blame him, Thomas is a sweet guy and has nice shoulders. Legendary shoulders, in fact.’

Cordelia started laughing. ‘Legendary shoulders.’

‘Precisely. As a lesbian, I can be very objective when it comes to men’s shoulders.’

Cordelia frowned, but Lucie insisted that made perfect sense. Since she didn’t feel attracted to men or fall in love with them, she had a very objective view and didn’t play favorites with the ones she did like.

‘A year ago I might have favored James,’ Cordelia mused. ‘I don’t think we were well suited though.’

Lucie loved her brother, and they’d always gotten along well, but James could be an idiot. She understood James didn’t like Alastair considering their history, but he simply didn’t understand that he should not bring Cordelia, who loved her brother and worried for him, into their history and that he shouldn’t say bad things about him in Cordelia’s presence. Perhaps Cordelia and James might have worked out better if their complicated feelings towards Alastair weren’t in the way. Alastair was Cordelia’s brother and James should have respected that.

‘Perhaps not,’ Lucie said. ‘I’m glad you can still be around each other though, and aren’t ready to murder each other at any given time like some exes. That would have been awkward.’

‘He apologized, a few months after we broke up. A bit late, but I think all your advice finally got through,’ Cordelia said. ‘I don’t resent him, and I understand why he doesn’t like Alastair, but next time I date anyone it will be someone who at least can be polite to brother.’

Lucie was fairly certain she could meet that criteria. She understood that Alastair hadn’t always been the best, but he had rescued her from bullies several times when he’d gone to school with her. If it was out of guilt towards James, or loyalty to Cordelia, Lucie wasn’t sure but she was grateful to him either way.

‘You have anyone in mind?’ Lucie asked, hoping there wasn’t anyone.

‘Not right now. James’ friend Matthew asked me out not so long ago, but I don’t think I like him that way. Besides, that would have guaranteed the same drama with Alastair, and now that I know what my brother has been through it’s hurtful to hear people say bad things about him. With James, I often let it slide because I often just didn’t want to argue or was scared he wouldn’t like me anymore, but he took that as me agreeing with him and giving him permission to complain as much as he liked.’

Lucie asked her father about her and Lucie having dinner in the village, claiming that way he and her mother could have some romantic alone time. That argument usually worked well on her father, along with Lucie promising she could pay for the meal herself, which her father claimed wasn’t necessary, he’d give her some money.

Her father even offered to drive her. It was a bit of a walk to the village but it was doable and the restaurant was on the side of the town where they’d enter, so Lucie decided she didn’t want to trouble her father.

Lucie changed into a longer red dress with a cardigan tied around her waist so she could put it on when it became too cold for short sleeves, and then she and Cordelia left, walking to the village.

They both kept their eyes open as they walked, although if there was something out there, without Thomas they wouldn’t be guaranteed to see it. Still, their chances of seeing something were better than those of the average mortal. There were no ghosts or other strange creatures to be seen though.

The restaurant wasn’t too busy, which was good because Lucie never did well in loud, busy places. They found a nice table in the corner from which Lucie could keep her eye on everything. Tatiana wasn’t in the restaurant. Would she recognize Lucie after all these years? She’d grown quite a bit and cut her hair after all.

Lucie ordered the vegan burger and Cordelia a curry. Eating vegan in Scotland was surprisingly easy nowadays, and many restaurants offered at least one vegan option. Lucie always made sure to check beforehand though. She knew at some places it was possible to ask for something vegan, but she didn’t want to go through that kind of trouble and risk having waiters not understand what she could and couldn’t eat.

They had almost finished their food by the time they saw Tatiana, Cordelia stealing the occasional chip from her plate. She came down from the stairs, glancing around. She didn’t seem to notice Lucie though. She was wearing a gray hat that resembled a witch hat, except less tall, and decorated with feathers in several colors. There was a girl behind her who matched the description Thomas had given. Around sixteen, very pretty in an unearthly way. Her hair was pale silvery blonde, Lucie didn’t think she’d ever seen anyone with hair naturally that color.

She trailed after Tatiana, a helpless look on her face. Lucie wondered if she wanted to be here, and who she was. Thomas had said they couldn’t make sense of her and weren’t sure if she was mortal or not. Lucie didn’t know either.

There was someone else trailing behind Tatiana though. Jesse was there, but he was leaving, following Tatiana. Lucie put the last bite of food into her mouth and quickly handed Cordelia the money her father had given her.

‘What are you doing?’ Cordelia asked.

‘Jesse is there,’ she said. ‘I’m going after him. Can you pay the bill with this? It should be plenty.’

Cordelia didn’t have time to protest as Lucie slipped out and went after Tatiana, making sure to keep a decent distance. Tatiana didn’t look around much, and Lucie didn’t think she’d been stopped. She tried to get Jesse’s attention, but he wasn’t looking back either. Tatiana left the village, following a path that led into the woods. Lucie didn’t want to follow her all the way along, not knowing where she’d end up, but she needed to speak with Jesse.

She quickly checked her phone, Cordelia had texted. She’d paid the bill and was outside, where was she? Lucie texted her live location and returned her attention to Tatiana, who kept a steady pace. The blonde girl did look back, and when her eyes went wide Lucie realized she’d been spotted. She ducked behind the tree, keeping her eyes on what happened in front, but the girl didn’t say anything and Tatiana didn’t turn around to confront her. If only Jesse would spot her and come talk.

Lucie continued following them, hoping Jesse would spot her. The blonde girl saw her once more, and gestured quickly, a worried look on her face. Lucie interpreted it as go away, you’re getting yourself in trouble. She knew what she was doing was dangerous, but with Thomas’ life possibly on the line, Lucie was going to take some risks. At least following someone into the woods wasn’t illegal. She wondered why the blonde girl was helping her. Lucie didn’t think she wanted to help Tatiana.

And why was Jesse following his mother? Could she see him, or was he trying to get her attention? When the blonde girl gestured to her a second time, Jesse finally noticed her. He glanced around at his mother and then made his way to her at top speed.

‘Lucie, what are you doing?’ he hissed.

‘Finally,’ she said. ‘I’ve been trying to get your attention. I need to talk to you.’

‘I need you to get out of the woods,’ Jesse said. ‘It’s dangerous here, alright?’

‘What is your mother up to? Who is that girl?’

‘Her name is Grace, that’s all I know. I think my mother might be blackmailing her somehow, I don’t think she wants to be here.’

‘Where have you been all these years?’ Lucie asked. ‘I never saw you before. I thought you’d moved on to the afterlife.’

‘I don’t know,’ Jesse said. ‘I don’t remember anything between dying and a few days ago. And I disappear all the time and have no idea where I go. I wanted to talk to you in the woods, I’d finally made my way from the hotel, but then I disappeared.’

That wasn’t something Lucie had ever encountered before. ‘What is your mother doing?’

‘I think she’s trying to reverse what happened,’ Jesse said. ‘She doesn’t tell me her plans, but I think it’s all about me. She often goes into the woods to speak with something, but I can’t come along.’

‘And she can see you?’

‘Yes,’ Jesse said. ‘Grace can too. Other people can’t see me. None except you. Is it because we knew each other when I was alive?’

‘I’ve always seen ghosts,’ Lucie said. ‘When you died, I searched for you everywhere and when I didn’t find you, I believed you’d moved on. I’ve never heard of ghosts returning from where they went after death. Or ghosts randomly disappearing and not remembering.’

‘I don’t understand it either,’ Jesse said. ‘I don’t know what’s happening to me. All I know is I am dead and I can’t be sure for how long. You’ve grown so much, Lucie.’

Lucie frowned. ‘Do you remember dying?’

‘I remember the woods. I remember something stalking me, but I could only catch glimpses of something. I’d never been so scared in my life and I thought I needed to get home as fast as I could. But no matter what path I took, I ended up where I started. The creature stalking me never quite caught up. I spent days in the woods, looking for a way out, until I died of exhaustion.’

‘People searched. Did you not see them, or hear them?’

‘There was no one,’ Jesse said. ‘I screamed and screamed for someone to help me, but no one came, and then everything was gone.’

‘Jesse!’ called a strict female voice. Tatiana. ‘Jesse, come along now! You must not stray in these woods. Even for you it can be dangerous.’

‘I must go,’ Jesse whispered. ‘Do not follow me.’

Lucie nodded, and returned, following the path back until she was at the edge of the woods. She didn’t see Cordelia and checked her phone, where she found several missed calls and missed messages from her friend.

Lucie called back, and Cordelia immediately picked up. ‘Lucie, where are you!’ Cordelia yelled. ‘Never do that to me again.’

‘Didn’t you get my location?’ Lucie asked.

‘Stupid thing didn’t work, you kept jumping all over town and whenever I caught up you weren’t there. What have you been up to, you have been gone for an hour!’

‘No, that’s impossible,’ Lucie said. ‘It was ten, fifteen minutes max.’

‘I don’t know how you sense of time is, but it’s been an hour,’ Cordelia insisted. ‘Where are you now?’

‘At the edge of the forest. I’ll return to the restaurant, might be easier to find.’

‘Alright, I’ll see you there,’ Cordelia said. ‘Bye.’

Cordelia hung up and Lucie returned to the restaurant, where Cordelia was waiting.

‘I knew you were reckless, Lu,’ Cordelia said. ‘But please never do this again.’

‘It hasn’t been an hour,’ Lucie insisted. ‘It can’t have been.’

‘Check the time,’ Cordelia said. ‘You texted me your location shortly after you left, which was an hour ago.’

Lucie checked the time stamp on Cordelia’s texts and realized she was right.

‘But how?’ she asked. ‘I wasn’t gone for that long.’

‘Did you at least speak to Jesse?’ Cordelia asked.

‘For a little while. It was all very odd. Jesse had disappeared until recently, he doesn’t remember where he’s been and at times he still disappears. He thinks his mother is trying to reverse what happened, he’s not sure exactly but she’s up to dangerous things. She can see him, and that girl too. Jesse said her name was Grace, but he doesn’t know what she is. He thinks Tatiana is blackmailing her somehow.’ Lucie paused, her father was calling her.

‘It’s getting late, Lulu, are you and Cordelia still at the restaurant?’ he asked when she picked up.

‘No, we left, but we’re still in the village,’ Lucie said. ‘It’s a bit of a long story, I’ll explain when we get home.’

‘I’ll come pick you up,’ her father said. ‘It’s getting late. You can explain in the car.’

If he was upset, she didn’t hear it. Lucie had always been told she got her recklessness from her father, and it was usually her mother who got upset with her when she did something like this.

‘We’re still near the restaurant,’ Lucie said and she hung up. ‘My father is coming to pick us up.’

‘Is he mad?’ Cordelia asked.

Lucie shook her head. ‘My father never really gets mad with me.’

Cordelia tilted her head. ‘Mine doesn’t either, at least not with me. My mother is the one with a temper, usually. And Alastair. But I guess my father just wasn’t really there.’

Lucie imagined it had to be difficult to discover such a terrible secret about your father after loving him for so long, after not seeing there was something not right at home.

‘If I’d done what you just did and told my mother, she would murder me for sure,’ Cordelia said, with a small smile. ‘Being a strict parent isn’t really effective though, Alastair and I just learnt to lie well. But I know she means well.’

‘Then you won’t mind not mentioning I’d followed Tatiana on my own?’ Lucie asked. ‘Instead, we went into the woods together, I spoke with Jesse, and when we returned suddenly an hour had passed.’

‘Sure,’ Cordelia said. ‘Honestly, I think your father believes anything I say.’

‘He does have a weakness for the Carstairs family,’ Lucie said.

Her father’s best friend was Jem Carstairs, Cordelia’s cousin. Her father had decided that by association, Cordelia and Alastair had to be just as amazing as Jem was. Lucie guessed that weak spot for the Carstairs had its downsides as well. Her father had idolized Elias as well as the other Carstairs, and learning of his addiction and abuse of his children had been quite a shock for him. Lucie suspected her father felt guilty for not seeing it sooner, for not doing anything to help.

When her father arrived, Lucie and Cordelia quickly got into the car, and Cordelia recounted the story of them going for a short walk following Jesse when suddenly an hour had passed and Lucie added in what Jesse had told her.

‘I knew Tatiana was up to something,’ Will said. ‘Reversing what happened, does that refer to Jesse’s death?’

Lucie guessed it would make sense for a mother to want to bring her child back. She had done something already, to bring him from something he didn’t remember back into this world.

‘So if she were to bring back Jesse,’ Cordelia said. ‘Would that mean Thomas dies in exchange for his life?’

Will looked grim. ‘If Benedict owed someone the soul of a grandchild and that creature took Jesse, I’m guessing Tatiana might attempt to exchange Thomas for Jesse. But it’ll probably cost more than just Thomas.’

#Lucie Herondale #Cordelia Carstairs #Thomas Lightwood #Alastair Carstairs #Thomastair #Lucelia #the last hours #tlh #fic #fanfiction

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ohnotoomanyfandoms · 4 years

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Not a fair stairs shipper but they will 100% share a kiss it seems! I see you don’t think so but even Cassandra hinted at it so maybe? Whether or not Cordelia kisses him back is the real question. Her feelings won’t be romantic though. Cordelia seems a bit naughty despite not wanted to damage her or her family’s reputation if you pay attention to some of her remarks in Cog. I think her hurt feelings and anger will have her sharing kisses that aren’t with James. I don’t see anyone being so angry without any kisses involved but that’s just me.....I don’t think Cordelia or Mathew will be as noble or considerate as you think..

Hi, thank you for your comment and theories!

I honestly, remain firm in my belief that nothing romantic will happen between Matthew and Cordelia of their own free volition, or between Cordelia and anyone else that isn’t James. Especially not while they’re married. Afterwards, who knows?

If the “””kiss””” that Cassandra has “hinted at” is the accidental brush of lips in the Chain of Iron excerpt, I do believe that’s really Cassie being a tease. Cordelia certainly didn’t think twice about it. Here’s what CC had to say about the scene.

I’ve talked extensively about Cordelia’s necessity to abide by the perfect girl standards for the time here, but I also want to give a couple of reasons for why Matthew would never kiss Cordelia in his right state.

First of all, I do sincerely believe his “feelings” for Cordelia are being caused or manipulated by Grace in some way (though not through the Gracelet, as that only controls James). Sure, Matthew could’ve been attracted to Cordelia as the new shiny toy in town, but something in him shifted halfway through Chain of Gold, especially after his interaction (and SUPER WEIRD KISS, still not over how anti-climatic and out of place that scene was) with Grace. I am certain she somehow manipulated him in that scene, possibly with magic. (Don’t forget that Grace has also magically convinced Charles “I will be the next Consul” Fairchild of breaking his long-standing engagement to Ariadne Bridgestock, the Inquisitor’s daughter with whom he has a perfectly convenient understanding about their sexualities, so that he could marry Grace herself, the ward of a disgraced madwoman? You have to admit something smells here...) By the end of the book, Matthew appears to be completely in love with Cordelia and bitter that James gets to marry her even if just for show since he believes James doesn’t truly love her. And yet, even with this belief, drunk, and possibly controlled by Grace, he still says of Cordelia:

“It would be one thing if James loved her. I would go into the quiet dark like Jem did and never speak of her again.”

Even more importantly, Matthew states he would never dare make any sort of move towards Cordelia, a betrothed/married woman. Let alone that she’s his own parabatai’s soon-to-be-wife.

“And yet,” Magnus said, “during that year, they are man and wife.” Matthew looked up, his green eyes flashing. “And during that year, I will do nothing. What kind of person do you think I am?”

Matthew is upset Magnus would even suggest that Matthew might take advantage of the situation. He is completely opposed. And he is so drunk he can barely stand when this conversation takes place, so we know he’s saying the absolute truth.

So, if Matthew wouldn’t do it and Cordelia shouldn’t do it (and shouldn’t want to either, since we have seen no indication that she is interested in Matthew that way), why would they share a kiss/romance?

There are other ways for people to cope with sadness and anger and frustration that aren’t finding refuge and comfort in other people’s arms. Our beloved characters don’t need to be developing new romantic relationships to cure old ones and to be okay. They can find comfort in friendship, in focusing on training, in planning a mission... the world will probably be going to hell with the killer on the loose and there won’t be much time for illicit affairs anyway.

I honestly don’t see the necessity for Cordelia to go kiss other people just because James lets her down, but then again, I also haven’t been seventeen for some years, so I may be thinking of this from a more mature perspective.

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shadowhuntertrash · 4 years

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High Notes

Chapter Ten

Characters belong to Cassandra Clare

The rest of the concert went well. The girls sang their set while James, Matthew, Thomas, and Christopher put their stuff up and helped set up a bit for the meet and greet for the fans.

When it was Alastair’s portion of the concert, Thomas had made his way backstage to watch him. He passed Cordelia and Lucie on the way and they both sent him matching smirks and Cordelia winked. Thomas had flipped them off but he was smiling too big for it to be taken rudely.

Alastair had looked beautiful. His face was bright, his eyes more alive than Thomas had ever seen. Alastair was always a people pleaser, even if he’d rather have one on one conversations and interactions. He used to act like he hated everyone but Thomas had always been able to see through that act.

Thomas was sure he looked utterly ridiculous watching Alastair sing like some lovesick fool but he couldn’t help the brazen smile that didn’t seem to want to leave his face. There were a few times when Alastair would turn and sing a line directly at Thomas and Thomas laughed at the fans who craned their neck to catch a glimpse of who Alastair was singing to.

After his set, Alastair walked directly up to Thomas and grabbed his hand, dragging him to what Thomas presumed was his changing room. “We should go on that date now.” Thomas laughed at the giddy eagerness of Alastair’s words, a slight fluttering feeling in his chest at the thought that he got to go on a date with Alastair.

“We still have the meet and greet.” Thomas said and laughed again when Alastair pouted. It made Thomas feel good, the amount of trust Alastair seemed to have in Thomas. Alastair was himself around Thomas which was a big thing since he was relatively masked around everyone else.

“You have no idea how this could go, you could hate me for all you know. This could be a terrible date.” Thomas said, a smirk on his face to hide the heavy feeling the words left on his heart.

Alastair’s eyes narrowed. “I could never hate you, Thomas Lightwood.” The fluttering feeling returned to his chest and Thomas averted his eyes, a warm feeling creeping up his neck. He couldn’t help the stupid smile that stretched across his face.

Thomas turned his eyes back to Alastair as he realized he had to go over some things, warn him about some of the downsides of dating Thomas. “I think it’s only fair to warn you that I’m not out yet. Whatever we have, if it works out I mean, would have to be a secret for a while. At least until I come out.” Thomas fiddled with his sleeves, his tongue running over his lips anxiously.

“If you don’t want that I completely understand, it’s a lot. I don’t want to make you do anything that you feel is uncomfortable.” Thomas watched as Alastair smiled softly, his hands coming up to cup Thomas’s cheek. He wondered briefly if Alastair could hear his racing heartbeat but then found he wouldn’t mind if he did.

Alastair smiled at him, wider this time. “Lightwood, you’re worth the wait.” Thomas let out a shuddering breath and closed his eyes instinctively. When he opened them again Alastair was exponentially closer, his eyes locked on Thomas’s lips as he licked his own.

Thomas let his eyes fall closed as he leaned in closer, anticipation thrumming through his veins. The moment was interrupted by the door opening and Thomas stepping back quickly. Both of their eyes opened and found Cordelia, her mouth opened as her eyes went back and forth between the two boys.

“Oh god,” She said, a quick breath leaving before a large smile appeared on her face as her eyes lit up. “Oh my god.” She said louder this time. “I knew it, oh my god, I knew it. Lucie owes me ten bucks.” She squealed as she launched herself into her brother’s arms.

Alastair caught her easily as he laughed at her excitement. His eyes found Thomas’s and he laughed again at the blush that had spread across Thomas’s cheeks. Lucie bound in a moment later and smiled at all of them.

“We have to go to the meet and greet now, stop being so slow.” She said, her hand going to Cordelia’s wrist as she dragged her friend out of the room. “You owe me ten bucks.” Cordelia said happily before they got to the door.

Lucie turned to her confused. “Why do I owe you ten bucks?” She asked and Cordelia just smiled before looking back at Thomas and Alastair who were both standing there flushed. Lucie followed her gaze and her mouth fell open as her eyes widened in understanding. “You’re kidding. Tell me your kidding.” She said, her wide eyes stuck on Thomas’s scarlet face.

Cordelia shook her head and laughed brightly. Lucie shrieked and threw her arms around Thomas in a way that was so like Cordelia that Thomas wondered how they weren’t siblings. Thomas wrapped his arms around Lucie and laughed quietly. “I’m so happy for you, Tommy.” Lucie said, her voice lower than it had been. Thomas sighed happily and let her go so he could look her in the eye.

“As much as I appreciate your enthusiasm girls, we’ve not done anything. We just decided to go on a date, which we haven’t even done yet.” Thomas said. Alastair laughed softly behind him but Cordelia and Lucie rolled their eyes. “Yes, but at least the pining is over.” Both boys went brilliant shades of red and Thomas coughed slightly to clear his throat.

“Yes, well, nevermind that.” The girls laugh and Lucie took his hand. “Don’t worry, by the way, we won’t tell anyone.” Thomas smiled and kissed her forehead, grateful that she was able to read his mind.

Thomas guessed that Lucie reading his mind came with being so close but he was thankful none the less. Lucie took his hand and pushed him so that his back was to her and he had barely managed to squat in time for her to throw her weight at his back. He groaned and pretended to drop her, Lucie squealed and tightened her grip around his neck. Thomas choked slightly and brought a hand up to pull Lucie’s arm until she was hanging on loosely.

“If you didn’t want me to choke you out then don’t pretend to drop me.” She huffed indignantly and Cordelia and Alastair laughed behind them. Alastair threw Thomas a soft look and Thomas couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face.

Cordelia took her brother’s hand and gave Thomas a knowing smile. “You two are going to have to wait a little longer because we really do have a meet and greet we need to get to.” Thomas laughed and nodded as he ducked under the door, mindful of Lucie’s head. Lucie took her arms and placed her hands on Thomas’s head before resting her chin on them. “I’m really proud of you Tommy. We all are. Are you going to tell the boys?”

Thomas hummed. “I will when this is real. Matthew knows far too much about how real I want this to be and how much I want this to work. If this doesn’t work out then I don’t want them all to pity me.” Lucie nodded and ran a hand through his hair. “I understand that.” Lucie looked over to where Cordelia and Alastair were laughing a little behind them. “I think this will work Thomas. I hope it does you both deserve it.”

Thomas lifted her up further and lifted his head so he could look at her. “Thank you. So when were you planning on telling me about Jesse?” Lucie turned a dark scarlet and looked ahead, Thomas laughed.

“I- We-” Lucie was saved from further embarrassment when James walked out of the door they were walking to. “There you are, what took you so long?” James said, grabbing Thomas’s arm and pulling him into the room. Thomas ducked again, Lucie bending her head so it wouldn’t hit the door frame.

There were about twenty people in the room. Most were teenagers, some parents, and few children. Thomas set Lucie down and winked at her. “That conversation was not avoided, simply postponed.” Lucie groaned and walked towards Cordelia.

Thomas spotted Talia right away, their eyes meeting at the same time. Talia smiled widely and ran over to him with her arms wide. Thomas bent down and scooped her up, spinning her in a circle as she giggled. “I’m very glad you stayed.” Thomas said as he rested her on his hip. Talia laughed again and wrapped her arms around his neck.

She bent her head forward and whispered. “Me too but it’s ten o’clock which is past my bedtime.” She giggled and looked over at her mom who was currently smiling at them from a chair across the room. “My mom hasn’t noticed though so don’t tell her.” Thomas laughed quietly and nodded seriously. “I would never.” He said and Talia gave him a calculating look that was rather intimidating for a six year old.

Talia leaned away from him before extending her pinky finger to him with narrowed eyes. “Pinky promise?” Thomas laughed softly but hooked his pinky around hers. “Pinky promise.” He said secretively. A large smile graced her face and she rested her head on his shoulder.

Thomas walked around and greeted a few people, Talia now asleep on his shoulder. Thomas found he rather liked meet and greets. It wasn’t as overwhelming as seeing a whole bunch of people at once nor as surprising as seeing someone in your everyday life.

After a while he sat down and talked to Talia’s mom. He had already grown quite fond of the little girl, not having known her very long. As it turns out the cheerful little girl that was still snoozing on his shoulder came from a relatively poor household. Her mother, Joyce, was a teenager when she got pregnant and was now a single mother. She had discovered she had breast cancer the year before and Thomas felt a wave of sadness wash over him as he listened to Joyce talk about their struggles as if it was a normal thing.

Thomas was rather rich from the music industry but growing up poor and sickly he knew the struggles it brought. He was offering financial help before he even registered what was happening, not that he changed his mind when his brain caught up to his mouth. Joyce blushed and Thomas felt a wave of guilt at having made her feel bad.

“Please, it’s really no trouble. We have what we need to get by.” Thomas just shook his head, his eyes on the sleeping girl in his arms. “I don’t doubt you do, I just think a family as special and sweet as y’all’s deserves more than the necessities. I grew up quite like you so just think about it as me projecting really. I want to help you give Talia what I didn’t have growing up.”

Joyce had stared at him for a minute and Thomas suddenly felt as if this had been a bad idea and she was offended or mad at him for even suggesting such a thing. Instead she just shook her head, a small smile gracing her lips. “Bless you Thomas Lightwood. You’re good people.” She said kindly as she hugged him gently, mindful of her sleeping daughter.

“We almost didn’t come tonight. A guy I work with was going to take his daughter but they both got sick and he knew how much Talia loved your music and so he gave us his tickets.” Thomas smiled widely. Fate seemed to know good people when it saw them. “I’m very glad you did.” Thomas said warmly before writing down his number on a napkin for Joyce to take.

“I do have to ask you not to give anyone that number naturally.” Joyce nodded with a quiet laugh. “I won’t. Thank you again for everything, I know my daughter can come on strong.” Thomas laughed and patted the girls head affectionately. He had always loved kids, he’d always wanted some. It was a hard thing to realize and come to terms with when he discovered he was gay and wouldn’t get to ahve any biologically, well without surrogates and such.

“You’re very welcome, it was my pleasure.” Thomas said softly as Joyce took her daughter. They hugged one last time before Joyce left.

Thomas had a warm feeling in his chest. He barely knew them but he was excited to get to know them better. They seemed like they were good, kind people. They were the type of people who truly deserve help.

Alastair made his way over as the last of the fans made their way out. Alastair grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room, dragging him back to his warm up room.

Once they got there Alastair plopped on the couch and Thomas wasted no time laying down beside him. Alastair stiffened slightly before relaxing and running his fingers through Thomas’s hair. Thomas sighed contentedly as he let his eyes close, exhaustion creeping up on him. So much for the date that night.

“Who were you talking to?” Alastair asked quietly, his voice tired too. Thomas yawned before he answered. “That was Joyce, Talia’s mom. Turns out she’s a single mom, only twenty three. She’s sick and they’re poor so treatments are expensive.” Thomas yawned again, his arm going around Alastair’s waist. “Helping them pay.” He said, his voice turning sluggish from the fatigue.

Alastair’s hand stilled in his hair. Thomas looked up at him and saw Alastair watching him with a smile he’d never seen before. “You’re helping them pay for the treatments?” Thomas nodded, his head tilted to the side as he tried to figure out what Alastair’s smile was. “Yeah, mortgage too. I mean I understand what it’s like growing up that way, the money it takes to get better. I thought it was a chance to make a difference in somebody’s life and you have to admit, Talia is the cutest kid you’ve ever seen.”

Alastair laughed and shook his head. “You’re such a good person Thomas.” He said quietly before dropping a kiss to his forehead. Thomas’s heart managed to skip a beat and speed up at the same time, a wave of heat spiking through his body as his cheeks flamed.

Thomas buried his head in Alastair’s chest, a stupid grin on his face. Alastair laughed and resumed stroking Thomas’s hair.

They sat there in comfortable silence, Thomas’s thoughts racing over the simple affection. Cordelia opened the door sometime later, Thomas had fallen asleep so he wasn’t sure how long they’d been there.

“We’ve got to get on the buses now. By the way, the boys have been looking for you Thomas.” Thomas groaned before getting up and stretching, not missing the way Alastair’s eyes fell to the strip of stomach that showed when his shirt rode up. A weird stroke of confidence hit him and he winked at Alastair before walking out.

Alastair’s cheeks heated up and Thomas took pride in reversing the roles for once. He heard Cordelia say something about being ‘so whipped already’ to Alastair before the door shut behind him.

Thomas found Matthew and James talking in hushed voices on the way to the bus. Matthew turned and saw Thomas first. “Thomas, there you are. We’ve been looking for you everywhere. Why is your face paint smudged?” Thomas felt a rush of alarm ring through him but he just shrugged with a tired smile. “I fell asleep.”

James nodded, believing it easily but Matthew stared at him for a minute before the ghost of a smile crossed his face and he tugged on James’s wrist. “Jamie, I’m tired.” Matthew whined. James smiled at his boyfriend and wrapped an arm around his shoulders before guiding them back to the bus.

“You good for the night, Thomas?” James asked as they stepped onto the bus. Thomas stood there for a second, confused, before he remembered that he and Alastair shared a bus for the nights. Thomas turned around in an attempt to hide his blush. “Yeah. You two get some sleep. I’ll meet up with you tomorrow.” James voiced his agreement before shutting the door to their bus.

Thomas yawned and made his way to the other bus. He climbed up the stairs and found Lucie sitting there with Cordelia. “Where’s Alasair?” Thomas asked as he plopped down on the small couch next to Lucie, his head resting in her lap.

Lucie ran her fingers through his hair with her long nails scratching his scalp, chills broke out on his arms. “He’s helping Jesse clean but all the equipment up.” Cordelia said. Thomas opened his eyes and looked at Lucie with a broad smile.

“Ah, Jesse. I do believe you owe me a story, love.” He said sweetly to Lucie who was blushing. Lucie flicked his forehead with her finger and bit her lip. “Do you two really want to know? It isn’t all that fun.”

Cordelia rolled her eyes and gave Thomas a ‘can you believe this girl’ look that made Thomas laugh loudly. “Yes we really want to know, you haven’t shown an interest in anyone since I met you and now you have a mysterious boy who seems to only like you? Yes, sweetheart we want to know so spill.” Cordelia said, excitement clear in her voice.

Lucie rolled her eyes before playing with Thomas’s fingers. “Well, I met him at boarding school. We didn’t really talk but then this guy stole my journal, the one where I write all my stories and started reading them out loud to the entire class. I was about to get up and tell him off in my, as you two call it, scarily feisty way, but this kid who has been silent all year just pushes the kid down, grabs my journal, and gives it back before walking straight out of the room.”

Lucie smiled slightly and Thomas could tell she was in the memory rather than just recalling it. “I followed him because as much as I appreciated it I could have handled my own and it would have been less embarrassing.” Lucie huffed slightly. “We all know I don’t need a stupid knight in shining armor, and I told him that. He just smiled at me and told me he knew very well that I could have stood my own but that I didn’t always have to.”

Cordelia’s face broke into a smile and she shared a look with Thomas. Lucie studiously ignored them. “Of course that was one hundred percent the best thing to say and he just left it at that and walked away. We normally didn’t see each other much but it’s like every turn we made we ran into each other. So we became friends and we may or may not have kissed a few times. I left before he did and we texted a while but then we just kind of stopped talking I guess.” Lucie’s face turned a little bittersweet.

“He’s gone through a lot, but he’s a good guy. I’m glad he’s here with us, when he opens up I think you all will like him a lot.” Thomas smiled at her and pulled her hand so he could kiss it gently. “I am very excited to get to know him. I have to say though, keep that story to yourself until James is really friends like him. That way James can’t hate him since he’s already admitted to liking him.”

Cordelia and Lucie laughed. “Thomas, bless your beautiful brain.” Thomas laughed loudly. “I have to say, only you could find Prince Charming in a school of knights.” Cordelia said, her voice somewhat dreamy. Lucie smiled softly, her eyes slightly glazed. “Yeah, I guess so.”

They fell into a comfortable silence that stretched until Alastair walked in. Thomas opened his eyes which had gained a hundred pounds with the exhaustion that crept in. Alastair looked at them all with a tender smile as he made his way over to Thomas.

“Tired?” He asked quietly when Thomas opened his eyes as wide as they would go, it wasn’t much but he could see Alastair and that was always enough. Thomas nodded and looked at the girls, both of whom had fallen asleep.

Alastair chuckled and took Thomas’s outreached hands to pull him up. Thomas stood, almost falling down when his leg refused to hold him up. “If I knew you were falling for me this hard, I would have asked you out earlier.” Alastair said with a smirk as he caught him with a questioning gaze, Thomas blushed. “Sorry, my leg’s asleep.” Alastair laughed and made sure Thomas could balance properly before going and waking his sister up.

Thomas turned and shook Lucie gently. Lucie just groaned and turned over so Thomas decided to take drastic measures. Lucie screamed as her sides were attacked by Thomas’s fingers. “Stop! Stop, I'm awake! I’m up!” She shrieked around her laughter as she swatted Thomas’s hands away.

Thomas laughed and looked over to where Alastair was talking quietly to Cordelia as her eyes opened slowly, his hand brushing away the dark curls that fell in her face. Thomas couldn’t help the rush of affection he felt as he watched the pair. Lucie sighed as she watched them too.

“Why can’t you be sweet like that, Thomas? Why must you attack me?” She asked as she draped herself across his back dramatically. Thomas laughed and shook her off, turning to see the pout on her lips. “Lucie, darling we all know I’m only sweet like that to my boys.” Lucie chuckled and shook her head.

Thomas shooed her with his hands. “Go get some sleep before tomorrow. No one wants a grumpy Lucie on the road or at practice.” Lucie huffed, affronted, and Cordelia laughed as she stood stretching. “Isn’t that true.” Lucie crossed her arms, sulking. Cordelia walked over and grabbed her arm, tugging gently as she walked towards the door.

“We have to get going so all the buses can leave. Plus they need some alone time.” Cordelia added with a stage whisper that made both boys turn red. Thomas shifted slightly, suddenly nervous to be alone with Alastair.

Thomas didn’t really have experience with boys. He’d dated a few in high school but when he started getting famous he shut everything down to stop rumors or the chance of forced outing. He hadn’t kissed anyone in at least two years and he didn’t know exactly what Alastair had planned.

What if Alastair had planned on kissing him already? What if he wanted to do more already? Thomas tapped his foot subconsciously as the doubts and anxiety started to build up. He felt a hand on his shoulder and jumped as he turned to look at Alastair.

Alastair was watching him with a concerned expression. “Are you okay, Thomas?” Thomas laughed tensely and looked down. “Umm, yeah. I’m just tired.” He said, hoping Alastair would take the hint and they could go to sleep.

“Okay.” He said slowly, his eyes never leaving Thomas’s. “You do know that I’m not going to do anything you’re uncomfortable with, right? That’s a known fact?” Thomas laughed incredulity, questioning how people could read him so clearly.

Thomas turned and looked at Alastair with a small smile, the anxiety loosening in his stomach. “Thank you.” Thomas said softly. Alastair just rolled his eyes and grabbed Thomas’s wrist. “Don’t thank me, that’s just being a decent person.” Thomas laughed as he let Alastair pull him to the bathroom.

They brushed their teeth and got ready for bed next to each other, going to their own rooms to change. Thomas peeked his head in Alastair’s room to find him reading on the bed. Thomas opened the door and stood there for a second not wanting to intrude, but Alastair looked at him and beckoned him in.

“Sorry, I was tired but I’ve woken myself up again.” Thomas said as he sat on the edge of the bed not quite sure how to talk to Alastair. It was like they had been friends forever but at the same time it felt like his life was moving so fast he couldn't catch up.

Alastair smiled at him sweetly, the book still open in his lap. “It’s no problem. I can’t go to sleep without reading first so I’ll be up if you want to stay a bit.” Thomas smiled gratefully at him and laid down, not too close to Alastair. “What are you reading?” He asked after a moment of silence had passed.

A book appeared above his head and he laughed quietly as he read the title, Frankenstein. Thomas hummed, he’d read it before but he’d liked it a lot. “Read it to me?” He asked quietly, instantly regretting it when Alastair gave him an unreadable look.

“Or don’t. You don’t have to, I can sit here. Sorry that was stupid.” Alastar shook his head quickly, his hand reaching down to Thomas’s shoulder. “No, you’re fine. People just don’t normally ask that, especially not this book.” He said laughing, Thomas joined him and let out his own nervous laughter. “Oh, well it’s one of my favorites.” Thomas said quietly as he watched Alastair pick the book back up.

Alastair winked at him from top of the book. “Mine as well.” He said before he began reading. Thomas loved Alastair’s voice, it was soothing and smooth in a way that was just so Alastair that it brought a smile to Thomas’s lips.

Thomas found his head in Alastair’s lap as his eyelids regained their heaviness. Thomas quoted a few lines with Alastair, the filter in his brain that kept him from coming on as a full nerd gone with exhaustion.

“I have love in me the likes of which you can scarcely imagine and rage the likes of which you would not believe. If I cannot satisfy one, I will indulge the other.” Thomas mumbled sleepily. It took him a minute to realize that Alastair was no longer reading and when he looked up he was Alastair’s eyes closed, mouth twitching as if he were still trying to read.

Thomas laughed quietly and sat up. He gently took the book out of Alastair’s hands and placed it on the table beside the bed. He pulled the blanket up to Alastair’s chin knowing he was almost always cold, where he knew that he was completely sure.

After he got Alastair settled in he made it to his own room and sent a quick text to his sister.

(Thomas = bold, Barbara = italics)

guess who got a date with the guy they’ve liked since they were eleven

Thomas you didn’t?!?!

How?!?

What happened?!?!

Thomas laughed at his sister’s excitement and lack of ability to send more than one sentence in a text.

we were about to get ready and we had been singing together and he just looked at me and asked if i wanted to go out

THOMAS?!

YOU SAID YES RIGHT?!?

I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU SAID NO CAUSE YOU OUT I WILL PERSONALLY COME AND TELL HIM ALL ABOUT YOUR MOPING WHEN YOU THOUGHT HE DIDN’T LIKE YOU

Thomas glared at the screen.

you wouldn’t

but yes I did agree, we’re going to go on one the day after tomorrow fyi

Thomas I’m really proud of you

Look at us getting dates and getting married

The dream

*is scoffing* getting married and going on a date is certainly not the same thing but I appreciate the sentiment anyway

It’s a step in the right direction.

How was the rest of your day? How was the concert?

it was magical Barb

everyone was so energetic and they were all screaming it was like a dream

i met this six year old, Talia, remind me to tell you more about her tomorrow

I’m glad everything went well.

We’ve all been worried you wouldn’t do well with so many people

wow, thanks for the faith

i do have to say all those people wore me out so i'm about to go to bed

Okay, but don’t forget to text me tomorrow. I love you sweet dreams use protection!!

BARBARA NOOO GO TO BED

Thomas turned his ringer off and sat his phone on the table next to his bed as he laughed. He knew Barabara would be excited for him, she knew how much he liked Alastair. It meant a lot that she was so supportive of him.

He was ready to see her again, he couldn’t believe she was engaged and he hadn’t even gotten to hug her.

Thomas shrugged off the homesick feeling and buried himself in the covers, a stupid smile still stuck on his face.

#thomas and alastair #alastair carstairs #thomas lightwood #matthew fairchild #matthew and james #james herondale #jesse blackthorn #cordelia carstairs #lucie herondale #jesse x lucie #high notes #tsc fanfiction #fanfiction #christopher lightwood

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kevoreally · 6 years

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#BuffyAt20 - S03E08 “Lover’s Walk”

> OKay, first thing’s first: is it Lovers or Lover’s? Wikipedia has the first one, Hulu has the second. Very confusing.

> Another fake-out opener where someone is being hyperbolic about the world ending but it’s just grades or something.

> Willow got a 740 verbal on her SATs. Like, I think she’s being too hard on herself, but I get not feeling academically fulfilled by that. I think I got 700? I don’t remember. My math sucked, that’s for sure.

> That Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel reference has endured the test of time.

> What is Xander’s score if it’s close to 740? We joke about his grades a lot but like. Get serious, son.

> Willow, that top is so loud.

> Omigod, I’m looking forward to going back to pretending Xillow never happened soon.

> Cordelia testing well is good continuity with “Band Candy.” And I loved them following up on SAT scores. I think these might have come out a little quick, but it’s fine.

> “That was my sarcastic voice.” “Y’know, it sounds a lot like your regular voice.” “I’ve been told that.” I feel you, Oz.

> Cordelia’s terror at the idea of double dating IS A DANGER SIGN, XANDER.

> I have Buffy’s SAT score memorized: “1430, Buffy, you kicked ass!” (A friend got the same score on her first take.)

> “Now you can leave and never come back.” I actually love Cordy here, a rarity for me lately.

> Pretty sure the shot of Spike crashing into the Sunnydale sign is just a retouched copy of the one from Season 2. Not a problem, just funny.

> I wasn’t sure I had the energy to do my #BuffyAt20 right now but this theme song is giving me life.

> I don’t get Spike’s obsession with Sinatra in this episode but sure.

> Oh man, remember the Factory? It’s a slot on my Buffy Monopoly board.

> Do we feel the flashback to when Dru left Spike that we get in Season 3 keeps in line with what we’re presented here? Dru accusing him of loving Buffy as far back as now? Hm.

> Literally the episode where Cordelia and Xander break up is the episode where it most seems like they’re a happy couple. And even then, they’re horrible to each other half the time. Sigh.

> Oz giving Willow the PEZ Witch is still one of the best things ever. I really wanted a wolf PEZ for Oz.

> Okay, a friend and I recently discussed a fan poll where people voted on their favorite mate for Willow and it made me uncomfortable that Oz was winning. But… I get it.

> There’s a lot of focus on Giles packing in this scene.

> Ooh! Worth noting: the guy who wrote this episode wrote three of my favorite #Daria episodes! He’ll also later write “The Zeppo.”

> This episode laid a lot of interesting potential for Buffy to be able to leave Sunnydale. Not forever, but, even if just for college. It was interesting.

> I wish I could make Buffy Now see how much Giles treated Seventeen Buffy like an adult over this Angel situation. He could’ve been SUUUCH a prick. And their relationship got really awkward for a while there, and I don’t think Buffy was entirely fair to him. Or probably him to her too. Fathers and daughters, man.

> I spent a whole dumb Xillow scene typing that last one. Not sorry.

> I’ve said it before but it’s wild that Buffy’s house never changes once in 7 seasons. The cinematography changes so much that it feels like a different house.

> How does Angel not hear, or even sense, Spike right outside the Mansion? Still recovering from Hell, I guess? Coz otherwise, wtf?

> I do love Spike waking up on fire.

> What happened to Spike’s car between Seasons 3 and 4 anyway? Where’s that story?

> “This is just too much.” Some real gentle language there, Spike.

> The Magic Box is, like, the same SHAPE we see in Season 5. But the layout isn’t totally right. And the back hasn’t been blown out yet. The storefront is the same. They moved the register away from the door. Hmm.

> Ooh, that Spike shot of grabbing the shop owner becomes his credits shot.

> Hey! It’s the Mayor! I forgot he’s in this one. And Allan! He’s pretty cute, tbh.

> “Boats did have canons. And a loose one would cause it to rock.” Lol.

> The way that the Mayor celebrates sinking that putt makes me wonder if he hadn’t been expecting it, haha.

> Where is Angel getting hair gel from in the Mansion? How is this a priority? Then again: same question at Derek Hale sleeping in a train yard.

> I’m not loving the dramatic beat when Angel tells Buffy she should leave. Like. Buff. Shouldn’t you? Sigh.

> Willow is trying to do magic on Xander without his consent. That’s actually an interesting portent for Season 6.

> Xander and Willow, like, really try and hold their own against Spike here. Mad respect.

> Alyson Hannigan shows such amazing vulnerability in the scenes with James Marsters, it’s bonkers. And then how it flips on a dime to be comedic. Wild chemistry, those two.

> OOOH, Dru accused Spike of going soft for teaming up with Buffy, eh? Interesting…

> HA! The “chaos demon, all slime and antlers” line was a favorite among fans, so we loved finally seeing him in Season 5.

> “I haven’t had a woman in weeks.” Blech. “Well, unless you count that shopkeeper.” Double blech.

> “I’m not a real witch, you know.” Heh.

> It. Is. SO. Clever. That Willow sends Spike to Buffy’s house. Holy. Shit.

> You know who else is a good version of Cordelia Chase? Valencia from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. Becomes a good person in, like, half the time it’s taking Cordy…

> Ugh, I hate coincidence moments like that. Buffy heard Spike on the phone when her mom happened to call? Sigh.

> YAAS, the Joyce/Spike bond! We needed more of this!

> Joyce Summer is Top 5 TV Mom material.

> “You get out of this house or I will stake you myself.” GEDDIT, JOYCE!

> Lol, remember how Buffy is going to start sleeping with Spike? This show, man.

> Spike just called Angel a “poof.” Nice.

> “What if they were kidnapped by Colombian drug lords?” CORDELIA. STOP.

> Oz smelling Willow is… interesting.

> Buffy is so eager to kill Spike.

> Did Buffy rip off Sookie Stackhouse with this love triangle or vice versa? Angel being Bill, Spike being Eric. Hm.

> Buffy always made kicking in doors look so cool.

> What exactly are we supposed to make of Spike’s observation about Buffy and Angel being in love here? I mean, he’s right. But. Like. What, they needed someone else to tell them?

> “I won, right? Kicked his ass?” “You were real brave. Do you need to barf.” Classy.

> “Give me a third option.” “He’s so drunk he forgets about us and we starve to death.” HA.

> AAAAAnd they kiss, aaaand Oz and Cordy show up, aaaand it’s horrible. AAAAND Oz is the only one who composes himself maturely, like always.

> Cordelia getting skewered was… so weird.

> They’re having this vampire fight, like, in the middle of downtown Sunnydale right now. I get that it’s probably 3am or something but omigod.

> Oh yeah, the storefront is definitely the same a when it’s the Magic Box.

> Seeing Buffy, Angel, and Spike standing side-by-side is a hoot.

> The “let’s give baby a taste” stuff Spike does is… No.

“ “Baby like his supper?” No. No he doesn’t.

> The table Spike stakes this guy on is, like, probably the same table he and Anya bang on in Season 6, haha.

> The holy water bombs are so cool. Why don’t they use holy water more often?

> The resolution of this Spike story is… so Spike. You know, we probably would’ve never seen him again if they didn’t love James Marsters SOOO much.

> Remember when they made us think Cordelia died? Like, right after she found of Xander cheated on her? This story was, like, one of the lowest points of the show. I’m sorry but it was. I remember laughing out loud when we found out Cordy wasn’t dead. That’s not something you wanna get a laugh on.

> What was the point of this story arc, though? “Don’t cheat or someone could die?” This is a ‘Blood on the Pavement’ type parable here. Way more Dawson’s Creek than Buffy The Vampire Slayer.

> I remember thinking Cordelia was going to be blind, because of the “I can’t see you” thing. I don’t know how being skewered would blind her.

> Okay, CAN WE TALK about the nailed-up broken sheets of wood at the Mansion entrance? It is the weirdest thing, it looks like a child’s tree fort.

> Buffy, if you think you’re fooling Giles and your friends into believing you don’t want Angel, you are sorely mistaken.

> Angel, be a big boy, let the seventeen year old girl go.

> She has to step through his weird cobbled-together wooden doorway! And it’s gone, like, after this episode! Wtf!

> This maudlin montage of all the characters being despondent was, like, the biggest bummer. Why do I love Season 3 so much?? This is such a downbeat point for the show.

> And there’s Spike riding off into the sunset. See you in a year, William.

#buffy #buffy the vampire slayer #BtVS #Buffy Season 3 #Lovers Walk #Spike #Angel #william the bloody #Buffy Watch #Buffy Blog

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livvyofthelake · 2 years

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omg is that beth actually doing a thing she was tagged on whaaat that’s crazy. anyway tee @willoughbyblake tagged me and i have been slightly Offline today and haven’t truly had a good ramble so you’re getting it <3

last song I listened to: unholy sam smith and kim petras…. like your honor they slayed

three ships: first of all i am going to say my most beloved most special most important most interesting most perfect most fucked up most romantic most everything ever super special little guys. frankly if you can’t guess what i’m about to say i don’t think you’ve been paying attention for the past. year. girls have a renaissance of something they cared wayyy too much about from 12-15 and don’t ever shut the fuck up about it. anyway kit and ty. i’m normal about it all btw. um secondly i’ll say cordelia and james because i am in fact sitting here waiting for them to finally fucking kiss like real people do. third. i’ll try to think of something not written by cassandra clare. can i say liv and major i loveeee liv and major. oh shit i should have said beronica. ok whatever they can share the third space xoxo

currently reading: my babygirl chain of thorns. also where the crawdads sing (has read one page). also as always, in the middle of the goldfinch (frankly i don’t think that’s going anywhere). and still redacted (not even necessarily anything embarrassing i just don’t want to talk about it. i might cry. i’m normal about it. well i mean it’s not a hard redacted to decode given the past like 11 months i guess. i might have even told you all already that i was reading it. nvm don’t even worry about it idk what i’ve said. i would have started this in fucking july). and a study in scarlet (girls when they said they would read The Canon of sherlock holmes but haven’t quite cracked into that first book in any meaningful way yet). and then also reading guinevere choices, which counts. to ME <3 look ok they’re called books and you do read so like lay off

last movie I watched: in FULL the last movie i watched was the squid and the whale last night. which was okay, certainly not necessarily bad, however i do think noah baumbach should kill himself. that’s like unrelated to the quality of the movie though that’s just a general opinion coming from a committed I Hope Jakey Dies girl. and the last movie i watched NOT in full is that i’m currently watching picnic at hanging rock. happy valentines <3

craving: hmm. honestly. i literally just had a smoothie tonight (i deserved a treat) but i would kill for another smoothie. i love a good berry smoothie i love the strawberries i love the blueberries i love it all i love slurping that shit up i wish i could have a smoothie every single day of my life

um i’ll tag @certifiedloverdyke and @subarubajafanclub if you’d like 🫶

#guinevere choice does count as a book ok it’s just short and interactive and has pictures…#beth.txt

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shadowhuntertrash · 4 years

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High Notes

Chapter Ten

Characters by Cassandra Clare

The rest of the concert went well. The girls sang their set while James, Matthew, Thomas, and Christopher put their stuff up and helped set up a bit for the meet and greet for the fans.

“You have no idea how this could go, you could hate me for all you know. This could be a terrible date.” Thomas said, a smirk on his face to hide the heavy feeling the words left on his heart.

After a while, he sat down and talked to Talia’s mom. He had already grown quite fond of the little girl, not having known her very long. As it turns out the cheerful little girl that was still snoozing on his shoulder came from a relatively poor household. Her mother, Joyce, was a teenager when she got pregnant and was now a single mother. She had discovered she had breast cancer the year before and Thomas felt a wave of sadness wash over him as he listened to Joyce talk about their struggles as if it was a normal thing.

Joyce had stared at him for a minute and Thomas suddenly felt as if this had been a bad idea and she was offended or mad at him for even suggesting such a thing. Instead, she just shook her head, a small smile gracing her lips. “Bless you Thomas Lightwood. You’re good people.” She said kindly as she hugged him gently, mindful of her sleeping daughter.

“I do have to ask you not to give anyone that number naturally.” Joyce nodded with a quiet laugh. “I won’t. Thank you again for everything, I know my daughter can come on strong.” Thomas laughed and patted the girl's head affectionately. He had always loved kids, he’d always wanted some. It was a hard thing to realize and come to terms with when he discovered he was gay and wouldn’t get to have any biologically, well without surrogates and such.

“You’re very welcome, it was my pleasure.” Thomas said softly as Joyce took her daughter. They hugged one last time before Joyce left.

Alastair made his way over as the last of the fans made their way out. Alastair grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room, dragging him back to his warm-up room.

“Who were you talking to?” Alastair asked quietly, his voice tired too. Thomas yawned before he answered. “That was Joyce, Talia’s mom. Turns out she’s a single mom, only twenty-three. She’s sick and they’re poor so treatments are expensive.” Thomas yawned again, his arm going around Alastair’s waist. “Helping them pay.” He said, his voice turning sluggish from the fatigue.

Thomas buried his head in Alastair’s chest, a stupid grin on his face. Alastair laughed and resumed stroking Thomas’s hair.

“We’ve got to get on the buses now. By the way, the boys have been looking for you, Thomas.” Thomas groaned before getting up and stretching, not missing the way Alastair’s eyes fell to the strip of stomach that showed when his shirt rode up. A weird stroke of confidence hit him and he winked at Alastair before walking out.

Alastair’s cheeks heated up and Thomas took pride in reversing the roles for once. He heard Cordelia say something about being ‘so whipped already’ to Alastair before the door shut behind him.

“You good for the night, Thomas?” James asked as they stepped onto the bus. Thomas stood there for a second, confused before he remembered that he and Alastair shared a bus for the nights. Thomas turned around in an attempt to hide his blush. “Yeah. You two get some sleep. I’ll meet up with you tomorrow.” James voiced his agreement before shutting the door to their bus.

Thomas yawned and made his way to the other bus. He climbed up the stairs and found Lucie sitting there with Cordelia. “Where’s Alastair?” Thomas asked as he plopped down on the small couch next to Lucie, his head resting in her lap.

Cordelia rolled her eyes and gave Thomas a ‘can you believe this girl’ look that made Thomas laugh loudly. “Yes we really want to know, you haven’t shown an interest in anyone since I met you and now you have a mysterious boy who seems to only like you? Yes, sweetheart, we want to know so spill.” Cordelia said, excitement clear in her voice.

Lucie rolled her eyes before playing with Thomas’s fingers. “Well, I met him at boarding school. We didn’t really talk but then this guy stole my journal, the one where I write all my stories, and started reading them out loud to the entire class. I was about to get up and tell him off in my, as you two call it, scarily feisty way, but this kid who has been silent all year just pushes the kid down grabs my journal, and gives it back before walking straight out of the room.”

Cordelia and Lucie laughed. “Thomas, bless your beautiful brain.” Thomas laughed loudly. “I have to say, only you could find Prince Charming in a school of knights,” Cordelia said, her voice somewhat dreamy. Lucie smiled softly, her eyes slightly glazed. “Yeah, I guess so.”

Thomas shooed her with his hands. “Go get some sleep before tomorrow. No one wants a grumpy Lucie on the road or at practice.” Lucie huffed, affronted, and Cordelia laughed as she stood stretching. “Isn’t that true?” Lucie crossed her arms, sulking. Cordelia walked over and grabbed her arm, tugging gently as she walked towards the door.

“Sorry, I was tired but I’ve woken myself up again.” Thomas said as he sat on the edge of the bed not quite sure how to talk to Alastair. It was like they had been friends forever but at the same time, it felt like his life was moving so fast he couldn't catch up.

Alastair winked at him from the top of the book. “Mine as well.” He said before he began reading. Thomas loved Alastair’s voice, it was soothing and smooth in a way that was just so Alastair that it brought a smile to Thomas’s lips.

After he got Alastair settled in he made it to his own room and sent a quick text to his sister.

(If you couldn't tell Barbie is Barbara)

Tommy <3

guess who got a date with the guy they’ve liked since they were eleven

Barbie

Thomas you didn’t?!?!

How?!?

What happened?!?!

Thomas laughed at his sister’s excitement and lack of ability to send more than one sentence in a text.

Tommy <3

we were about to get ready and we had been singing together and he just looked at me and asked if i wanted to go out

Barbie

THOMAS?!

YOU SAID YES RIGHT?!?

I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU SAID NO CAUSE YOU FREAKED OUT I WILL PERSONALLY COME AND TELL HIM ALL ABOUT YOUR MOPING WHEN YOU THOUGHT HE DIDN’T LIKE YOU

Thomas glared at the screen.

Tommy <3

you wouldn’t

but yes I did agree, we’re going to go on one the day after tomorrow fyi

Barbie

Thomas I’m really proud of you

Look at us getting dates and getting married

The dream

Tommy <3

*is scoffing* getting married and going on a date is certainly not the same thing but I appreciate the sentiment anyway

Barbie

It’s a step in the right direction.

How was the rest of your day? How was the concert?

Tommy <3

it was magical Barb

everyone was so energetic and they were all screaming it was like a dream

i met this six year old, Talia, remind me to tell you more about her tomorrow

Barbie

I’m glad everything went well.

We’ve all been worried you wouldn’t do well with so many people

Tommy <3

wow, thanks for the ego boost

i do have to say all those people wore me out so i’m about to go to bed

Barbie

Okay, but don’t forget to text me tomorrow. I love you sweet dreams use protection!!

Tommy<3

BARBARA NOOO GO TO BED

He was ready to see her again, he couldn’t believe she was engaged and he hadn’t even gotten to hug her.

Thomas shrugged off the homesick feeling and buried himself in the covers, a stupid smile still stuck on his face.

#high notes #high notes: chapter ten #thomastair #thomas lightwood #alastair carstairs #merry thieves #cordelia carstairs #lucie herondale #barbara lightwood #band au

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