#just add magic the rise of a fascist dark lord a high-pressure society a weird school and house elves

[arggghhhsstuff]

@foursaints post about ideals jobs for barty send me on a loop, for here's my quick barty analysis. i have more if anyone's interested.

his full name is Bartemius Crouch Junior. it means that not one, but two women made the decision to call their son Bartemius. it drives him crazy

he’s a weirdo. a fucker. an irreverent piece of shit. a criminal. an arsonist. he speaks Italian with his mother because it’s the only thing his father can’t touch. he hates him so much he became a terrorist, isn’t that cute?

he’s a line cook at a shitty diner, but he’s also dj-ing in his free time. he’s great at teaching but he hates kids- but he loves his niece, she’s his everything. he contains multitudes.

when he was a teen, he worked as a cashier and never checked the amount or what people were hiding in their purses. he stole from the liquor section but never got caught. he was eventually fired for smoking weed on the job.

he has burn marks all over his arms from playing with cables and electricity and fire. the older ones are from his dad, though. they're the only ones that aren't incorporated in his tattoos designs

speaking of tattoos: he’s covered in them. shitty tattoos, intricate pieces of art, some of his own design. most of them were done when he was drunk, or high, or both. He got one for every person he loves: evan’s initials on his hipbone and his bite mark of his arm, where everyone can see it. a snake on his left arm for regulus. runes for pandora. some motifs are recurrent: snakes, knives, bats, skulls.

he drives like a madman, it’s a miracle anyone ever sold him a car.

(they didn’t, it’s a shitty truck he got from the nephew of the neighbor's cousin of his mom’s boyfriend from when she was in college)

he has that look of hunger on his face, like he was starved for too long. of what no one knows. food, sex, love, drugs, answers, forgiveness? all of that is kind of true anyway.

he doesn’t believe in magic or fate and is the most sinful man alive, but he gets weirdly silent inside of churches. no one knows that his deal is, but they've learned to leave him alone.

When he looks into the mirror, it's his father who looks back.