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#barbie#barbie memes#barbie allan#queer barbie#allan x ken#just brainstorming images to promote my fics#this suggests more violence than I can deliver
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Hi Lola!
Do you have any advice for overcoming writers block? I've tried a few methods out myself. Can't seem to get myself out of this rut lol I really admire your dedication to promoting fanfic so I thought I'd pick your brain! :) I mainly dabble in Caryl but I've ventured out into other fandoms I like. Caryl is where I am stagnant right now. Thanks a lot for any words you can give me lol Caryl on!!! :)
Hi, anon! Thanks for sending this ask, I love to talk about all the things fanfiction and writer's block intersect with my real life job too so we can kill two birds with one stone. 😊 First, since you write for other fandoms, it might be interesting to try to understand why you're particularly stuck with Caryl. You might be very invested in writing for our ship and that can be triggering anxious responses that make it hard to concentrate in your task. Or you might being affected by the emotional roller coaster our fandom is currently experience. Switching between highs too high and lows too low is emotionally exhausting and affects our disposition to do everything, including things we love like writing. Taking a time away from the fandom can help with that. Re-watching caryl scenes or re-reading your favorite fics (and here you can definitely include your own work) can help to restart the joy. Second, there are practical things you can do to help with your block. I'll list a few that work for me: 1. Try to establish a writing routine that makes sense and works for you. You don't have to write everyday or for the same length of time every time, but you can do little stuff that signal to your brain 'hey, it is time to write'. For example, setting a timer so you can write uninterruptedly for short amount of times; listening to a special caryl playlist to get you in the mood or white noise if you get easily distracted with external noises; having a glass of water and a snack right from the start with you so you don't need to get up when you feel thirsty/hungry; creating a comfortable environment to write by sitting in a good chair and having adequate light; 2. Write those scenes that you are dying to write for first. You know those scenes that are the heart of your chapter/one-shot, that you keep daydreaming about? Write them first. Put what brings you joy about your story right on paper and, then, later, fill up with every other scene that leads to it or comes after it. This might be easier than trying to write in the right order, because opening scenes can be very difficult and the main scenes will help set the tone of the rest of the chapter/one-shot;
3. If you're having a hard time describing images or voicing your character's voices and feelings, write the dialogue first. It will help to establish rhythm later when you get back to it to fill the blanks. You can do something like this: [description of the cabin Carol and Daryl are, the sofa is still plush and of a faded pink and there's dust everywhere] " What about this room?" Daryl asks [need to indicate later that he's feeling frustrated but with another noun]. " It'll do for tonight." 4. If you can't put anything at all on paper, you can brainstorm with yourself (or a friend) and write key words that will help you later when you're feeling more inclined to write. Same example than before: evening - abandoned cabin - just a light little coming from outside - lux pink couch - daryl frustrated - carol feelings - small talk - elephant in the room about major plot point You can elaborate as much as you want, turning keywords into key phrases, writing a sentence or two and building on that. 5. Okay, not even key words are working? Get your phone and record what you are imagining on an app that translates audio to text. Come back and edit it later, turning it into workable prose.
I hope these tips help you out, anon. Thanks again for the ask. If you manage to finish writing your caryl fic, no matter who short it is, please let me know so I can read it? It will be a pleasure, I'm sure of it.
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hi I'm an aspiring fanfic writer....have a few (read: a lot of) drafts and ideas, but I have zero ideas how to start a blog here. Can you please give me some writing tips and some how to promote your blog here tips because I'm afraid no-one is going to actually read my fics :(
hi :3 of course i'll give some tips, but please keep in mind that i am by no means a professional + most of these are based on my opinions/observations!! if you have any more questions, please don't be afraid to reach out
writing
one. be original! the most interesting thing about writing, in my opinion, is brainstorming and coming up with original plots. of course, it is okay to be inspired by an author, but it feels more rewarding. two. try to write a bit every day! it's easy to get burned out or get writer's block, personally i think the best way to get around this is by writing a little every day. it doesn't have to be anything that you see yourself publishing, little paragraphs or scenarios should be enough. additionally: set yourself some writing goals to keep it consistent and keep yourself motivated. three. write what you want to read! this is kind of related to the first point, but here i'd like to emphasise just that: write what you want to read. if you thought of an idea, whether it's a plot or an au or anything, and you try to look it up but can't find it, it may be fun to bring that idea of yours to life to share with others!
promoting
one. tags! always make sure to tag your fics relevantly to reach the target audience. for example, "#(group/member) fluff" "#(group/member) fanfic" two. timing! to keep engagement consistent, make sure to post at least once or twice a week. additionally, try to figure out at what times you get the most notes and schedule yourself to post at those times. three. fic layout! the layout and overall look of the fic is also important. having a messy or boring layout will not catch the reader's eye. if you look at other authors, you'll notice that the structure is commonly: 1. title + person // 2. some type of header (usually mood boards) // 3. summary/synopsis // 4. specific of the fic (e.g. genre, trope, warnings, word count) // 5. at least the first paragraph of the fic // 6. a cut. this is also my personal go-to for formatting and i usually stick to three images side by side for the header. the summary and starting paragraph are probably the most important part of getting people to read your fic, make sure it's intriguing and gives enough information without telling the whole story
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So I feel like I haven’t mentioned in a while that I have a Patreon, and since I seem to be posting more on it -- that’s what both of the last posts were from -- I figured I should mention that it, y’know, exists. So it exists. I just always feel a little weird promoting myself.
Everything that is on the Patreon -- with the exception of the dog pictures and some of my brainstorming material or other WIPs that sometimes end up there -- gets reposted elsewhere eventually, usually at the beginning of the month, sometimes later if it’s a current WIP and I’m not done yet. (Like, currently some of the subscribers can read the first chapter of the DreamVision AU I’m writing but you’re all going to be able to read it when I’m done.)
So nothing is permanently paywalled there because it’s pretty much all going to be public sooner or later; it’s also a way to commission me to write meta/reviews if there’s something you desperately want me to read and review for you. (I don’t do fic commissions except as part of charity auctions.) I am still writing meta for here, because image-heavy meta is a better fit for Tumblr than Patreon, and I am working on a couple of those sorts of posts for here -- and I will, at some point, turn asks back on here, probably when I am finished with this fic draft, and you can then hit me up with questions here again.
(Basically, it is me attempting to use Patreon as a tip jar for meta, and, yes, I know Ko-Fi exists but I just like the part where Patreon doesn’t automatically send out the name/address associated with your PayPal to everyone involved in the transaction like Ko-Fi does (or did, the last time I Ko-Fi’d someone), and for a lot of people that’s RL info. All I know on Patreon is whatever name/email is associated with your Patreon, which can be fannish in nature.)
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✨ About and Rules ✨ [now mobile friendly!]
(updated 2021-10-31)
About the author:
Koumine [KOH-mee-nay], call me Kou
she/her
late 20s
Chinese American
pansexual/panromantic, grey ace, grey aro, dom/top
fat, queer, masc, sex-favorable, and fucking awesome 😎
About this blog:
This blog is for: my spicy fanfic and a curation of various things I like (mostly spicy)
primary fandom: Obey Me!
other fandoms: The Mandalorian, Pacific Rim, too many other fandoms to count...
My non-spicy fics and/or other fanworks will be posted on my main blog, dral-koumine, and will most likely get reblogged here.
Update schedule? Never heard of it 😅
Image credit: avatar and banner were made by me.
Let me know if there’s a way I can make my theme more accessible to you!
Rules (for me and you):
We respect and uplift the voices and experiences of people with marginalized identities. As a writer, I purposefully include good representation for folx with marginalized identities in my work, to the best of my ability. This is and will always be a work in progress; I'm learning something new about experiences different from my own every day. If you notice something I could be doing better, feel free to let me know and I will do my best to fix it.
We do not kinkshame. Kink is weird and often unexplainable. It doesn't necessarily reflect on who we are as people; fantasy isn't reality. Something you like will inevitably squick someone else out there, and vice versa. Remember the Kink Tomato: Your Kink Is Not My Kink And That's Okay (YKINMKATO). I do my best to tag all kinks relevant to my content (either in the tag field or within the post itself). If I miss something, please let me know and I will do my best to fix it.
We respect consent and promote/represent good kink & BDSM practices, including: consent negotiation, kink negotiation, establishment and use of safewords/signals, mid-scene check-ins, aftercare, etc.
I don't write for requests, but I do occasionally do ask games. Check out the ask game tag! All ask games are open unless declared otherwise.
Inbox is open and anon is on. I love headcanons and brainstorms! Feel free to share yours, or just pop in to say hi :)
I do image descriptions for content on my blog whenever I have the time and energy for it.
If anything on my blog is inaccessible, please let me know and I will do my best to fix it.
Remember to hydrate :)
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Whirlwind Romance (Part 1)
Prompt: You’re getting married to Chris Evans... Everything in your life is perfect... Except when you break the news to your two best friends: Tom Hiddleston and Sebastian Stan
Word Count: 2446
Warnings: language, anger, angst...
Notes: Beta’d by @like-a-bag-of-potatoes bcuz shes amazing and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo @carryonmyswansong for letting me brainstorm with them. Got this idea from @formyfandoms... Fic image made by the super bomb @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Ms. Y/L/N, you’re on in ten minutes,” a backstage organizer informed you as you stood outside your dressing room, playing on your phone.
“Oh, thank you,” you kindly said before taking a deep breath.
“There she is!” a very familiar voice announced from your right as he came down the hall.
“Hey!” you greeted happily to Sebastian, your best friend. The two of you embraced and you felt the same warm, fuzzy feeling you got every time he was around. Sebastian was your goofy, loving, other half. He shared the same amount of silly that you did, making him the best to have around when your life got completely maddening.
“Last stop on the tour, huh?” he noted, referring to the promotional tour the two of you were doing. The two of you had starred in your second film together, and for the last couple months, you’d been to all sorts of interviews and events to get the word out. Tonight on Conan would be the last stop for dedicated promotion for both of you. Sebastian had other filming obligations to get to, and you were about to start work on a film with your other best friend, Tom.
“Yeah looks like it,” you remarked with a relieved smile. “I’m gonna miss going everywhere with you though!” you almost whined.
Seb laughed and threw his arm around your shoulders as the two of you walked toward the stage. This was almost as familiar as breathing to you, being around him, joking with him.
“Hey, just because we aren’t touring together doesn’t mean we won’t see each other. You know that,” he reminded. On that front, he was definitely right. You two were in a large circle of the same friends, played in similar movies, and even if none of that occurred, you’d been best friends for seven years.
“I know, you’re right. But touring with you has been so fun.”
“You make it sound like it’ll be the last time we tour together,” he teased as the two of you walked towards the stage.
“It might be, if you don’t learn how to have a professional interview,” you teased right back.
He put his hand on his chest. “Now that really hurt, Y/N.”
“I’m sure you’ll live,” you joked with an eye roll just as the two of you reached the doorway to backstage.
“You two are on in thirty,” a different crew member told you as they came up beside you, armed with a clipboard and headset.
The two of you nodded and you waited for Conan to announce you.
“Starring in their second film together, Sebastian Stan and Y/N Y/L/N! Give it up everybody!” Conan said jovially, marking the moment for the two of you two walk out. Sebastian walked out first, with you on his heels.
The two of you waved and smiled politely, following the same usual etiquette for these sort of things. Conan shook Seb’s hand and patted him on the back before shaking your hand and kissing your cheek. You took the seat closest to Conan, and Seb sat on your right on the neighboring couch.
“Oh, wow, well welcome back!” he said to the two of you. “Sebastian I think the last time we had you was… The Bronze?”
“The Bronze, yep.”
“Wow. Been a little bit. And Y/N, the last time we had you was for your role in Neverending Water.”
“Mhm,” you said nodding your head, looking out to the crowd.
“And now the two of you are back, promoting your second film together. Sebastian, you’re here for I, Tonya as well right? You’re one busy guy!”
“Hey, gotta pay the bills, right?” he said with a slight shrug and smile.
“That’s true,” Conan agreed. “So tell us about his drama the two of you are in this time around.”
You and Sebastian looked at each other briefly. “Do you want me to or…?” you asked him.
“Be my guest,” he said, gesturing to you.
You laughed and turned back to Conan. “Well it’s a drama-mystery. It’s about a woman whose daughter goes missing, and everyone in the town says she never had a daughter.”
“Crazy stuff, crazy stuff. And who do you two play in it? How are you related to the woman and the daughter?”
“I play the neighbor,” Sebastian informed.
“And I play the mother’s sister,” you added.
“Well, we have a clip with the two of you. Mind giving some prelude to it?”
You nodded. “Sure. This is where Sebastian’s character, Greg, is accusing me of being as crazy as my sister. My character, Lucy, is sick of the town turning against us. So… this is where the conflict starts to come to a head.”
“Alright, great. Let’s see you two at each other’s throats!” Conan said with a laugh and you two turned to face the screen, watching the twenty second snippet of you two screaming at each other. That scene was honestly so fun to shoot because you would never in the world scream at Sebastian, so to get to do that to him in film was a new experience.
“Jeez, Y/N, you really laid into him!” Conan noted with an impressed voice.
“Oh, just years of repressed anger,” you joked as you patted Sebastian’s hand, to which he grinned at you.
“That’s right. You two have been friends for how long now?”
“Seven years,” you responded with a fond bob of your head.
“Man that is a long time to know someone. And that’s because you two starred in Jagged Edge, right?”
Both of you nodded.
“Now, Sebastian you’re done with I, Tonya and now Missing. I hear you’re going on to another role.”
Seb nodded.
“And Y/N, you’re wrapping up Missing and going on to a film with Tom Hiddleston, is that correct?”
“Yeah, we’ve got a romantic comedy in the works.”
“And all three of you are friends. Like best friends?”
You nodded with a pleased grin. “Yep. They’re my two best friends.”
“Yeah, the media likes to call you the Three Musketeers of Hollywood. In fact, we have a good picture of the three of you.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah, let’s get that up there,” Conan instructed.
A picture appeared on the screen, and it was honestly one of your favorites. It was a picture at the red carpet event for Captain America: Civil War. You had it framed, and hung in your living room you loved it that much. Just seeing it gave you a warm feeling.
“Okay, so tell us what’s happening in this picture,” Conan requested.
You laughed, thinking back to that night.
“Ugh, my feet are killing me,” you noted to Chris as you walked. Normally, heels never bothered you, it came with the territory for the job. But like a fool, these were brand new and you didn’t break them in. Instead, you strapped these stilettos on just before attending two different pre-premier parties, and now you were strutting down the red carpet. Since Chris, your boyfriend, was the star, there was a lot of standing around, posing, and very slow walking.
“I’m sorry, babe. Want me to carry you?” he teased.
“What’s this about carrying Y/N?” Sebastian asked as he walked up.
“Chris is being a goof,” you informed, brushing him off.
“No, no, I distinctly heard something about carrying you,” Sebastian said in a mischievous voice.
You quickly picked up what he was saying and you were about to backup and run, but on the red carpet, that would be a no-no. So you stood in place, gently begging them not to, but when Chris and Seb got that look in their eye there was nothing stopping them.
“Yeah, man, she said her feet hurt. I think she should be taken off her feet,” Chris said.
“No, no, no,” you said, backing up a step from the two of them, wagging your finger.
“What’s all this?” Tom suddenly asked from beside you. He’d been down a ways on the carpet, but the three of you had been stalling with this goofing around.
“We’re gonna carry Y/N into the premiere, give her feet a break, you in?” Seb asked.
“I’d be delighted!” he said as his face lit up.
“No! Tom! What the hell?!” you asked, but your anger was very much not real, seeing as you were already laughing.
“On three, guys?” Chris asked as he looked to your best friends.
“On three,” Tom agreed.
“What? No! No!” you pleaded in a futile attempt.
In a flash, Chris had grabbed your torso, Seb grabbed around your hips, and Tom grabbed your legs, and since you knew better than to fight, you just prayed they held onto you. By the time they got situated, you were on your side, as the three of them were lined up on your backside, holding a portion of you. Almost as if you were a surfboard on your side.
The photographers ate it up. Flashes went off like never before as the three men held you in the air and you posed, putting your hand under your head, as if you were posing for a magazine layout. Thus, it resulted in a picture of you being carried by your boyfriend, and your two best friends, while you donned a vibrant red evening gown and heels. Each of you looked amazing, with stunning smiles on your faces.
The boys kept to their word too, they didn’t let you walk. Instead, they ushered you into the theater, as soon as the cameras were out of view, they sat you down.
On Conan, however, all you said was that the boys were just goofing around, and decided to carry you on a joke.
“Now this picture, it’s great because it shows your two best friends, who you’ve played in movies with, but your boyfriend Chris, you and him have never played in anything together, why is that? Don't wanna mix business and pleasure?” Conan teased.
You laughed and said, “Something like that.” The crowd laughed and you waited until you could say, “No, no. So far our schedules haven’t really aligned and we just haven’t gone for roles in films we’d like. Nothing has come across for either of us that has a role tailored to what we’d like so… I’m not opposed to it, the opportunity just hasn’t arised.”
“I see, well maybe someday right? Speaking of Chris Evans… we heard through the grapevine that there are wedding bells. Is that true?”
Instantly, a pit formed in your stomach as you got cold and hot at the same time. No one was supposed to know about that. It only happened two weeks ago in the confidence of your family. You and Chris agreed to keep it a secret but now that you were asked, you weren’t sure if denying the engagement on live television would look good.
Your mind flashed back to the evening it took place. Chris was wearing a brand new blue sweater you’d gotten him, an early Christmas present to wear at your parents. He looked like he could be on the cover of GQ with as polished and handsome as he looked, even in his beard. The beard took some time to grow on you, but once it was full, you had to admit, he looked petty damned sexy. But that night, he’d gotten you tons of gifts that you adored. Jewelry you’d been eyeing, a book that you’d mentioned wanting, and a little figurine you’d seen on a trip together months ago. The rest were small things you’d asked for around the house, or something for your car.
But then, you opened a smaller box, and you had no idea what lay inside. When you opened it, and a ring box fell out, you thought it was just more jewelry, until you heard your mom gasp and you looked up, only to see Chris on his knee in front of you.
Your eyes had gone between the box and Chris about fifty times before he started his jaw-dropping, romantic, sappy speech. When he was done, you were grinning like an idiot, and said “yes” to him rather loudly. Earning some cheering from your family as the two of you embraced.
“Uh, yeah, yes, that’s right,” you informed, nodding.
At this, the audience’s decibel level nearly became unbearable.
“Well do you have the ring? When and how did this happen? You owe a lot of heartbroken girls all the details,” Conan pressed kindly.
A charming laugh bubbled out of your lips. “Well, it was at Christmas,” you started. “It was pretty traditional. He asked my father for our blessing in front of me, then got down on one knee when I opened it and…” You trailed off with a shrug. “Here it is,” you stated, showing him and the audience the ring.
“I had no idea,” Sebastian suddenly blurted out when you got around to showing him. His jaw had nearly dropped and his eyebrows were raised slightly in shock.
“Sorry, we wanted to keep it a secret but I guess cat’s out of the bag,” you apologized with a shrug.
For some reason though, the shock on Sebastian’s face never recovered. The rest of the interview went well but Seb seemed to be off his game for the rest of it, remaining a little more quiet than usual. The interview ended and the two of you went backstage to get unhooked from your mics.
“Hey, you okay?” you asked Seb as you lightly nudged him with your elbow. “You seem pretty quiet ever since the engagement thing.”
He looked up at you with a sullen gaze. “Huh? Yeah. Just… surprised is all. I guess I would’ve thought you would’ve told your best friend,” he remarked with a nervous sort of laugh.
At his odd behavior, you frowned. Why wasn’t Seb happy for you? You and Chris were his best friends, hell it was because of Seb that you’d even met Chris.
“Well, we wanted to, but we also wanted to keep it to ourselves for a little bit.”
“I get that,” he offered, understanding full well he liked his private life kept rather private as well.
“Are you not happy for us or…?”
As if he sobered up, he took a deep breath and gave you a star-studded smile and said, “No, yeah, of course I’m happy. Why wouldn't I be? I was just surprised is all. This is awesome. Congratulations,” he said before pulling you into a hug.
“Thanks,” you kindly said.
After that, Seb took you out to dinner to celebrate.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Forever Tags:
@essie1876
@magpiegirl80
@letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked
@iamwarrenspeace
@marvel-imagines-yes-please
@superwholocked527
@missinstantgratification
@thejemersoninferno
@rda1989
@munlis
@thefridgeismybestie
@bubblyanarocks3
@igiveupicantthinkofausername
@kaliforniacoastalteens
@feelmyroarrrr
@kaeling
@friendlyneighbourhoodweirdo
@damalseer
@heyitscam99
@yknott81
@sorryimacrapwriter
@glitterquadricorn
@xxqueenofisolationxx
@little-dis-kaalista-pythonissama
@bittersweetunicorm
@alyssaj23
@sea040561
@princess76179
@thisismysecrethappyplace
Tom Hiddleston:
@camigt1999
@lenawiinchester
@esoltis280
Sebastian Stan:
@nedthegay
@lostinspace33
@alwayshave-faith
@elleatrixlestrange
@buenostardissherlock
@lenawiinchester
@the-red-world-of-jess-chibi
@memory-of-a-goldfish
@shamptain-shmerica
@crazybutconfidentaf
@esoltis280
@alwayshave-faith
Chris Evans:
@nedthegay
@camigt1999
@lostinspace33
@alwayshave-faith
@elleatrixlestrange
@lenawiinchester
@mellsstark
@esoltis280
#whirlwind romance#tom hiddleston x reader#chris evans x reader#sebastian stan x reader#tom hiddleston#chris evans#sebastian stan
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For your headcanons meme: Darwin and/or Madra (Sorry if this is a repeat)
THIS MADE ME SCREAM WITH DELIGHT even though I didn’t really have headcanons about Darwin and Madra so I had to THINK OF THEM, sorry this took me so long, also sorry this is kind of more of a fic(?) about Eva but Darwin and Madra are there, it’s just what happened when I started brainstorming. And also sorry to everyone who is particularly sensitive to horror of getting infested because CONTENT WARNING: THIS IS A LOT OF THAT!!!
Send me a character and I’ll write 10 headcanons!
As soon as Eva heard Marco’s voice, both she and Edriss went quiet. There was a certain calmness shared between the two of them, a revelation and a premonition. They both knew how resilient the “Andalite” bandits were, and they both knew how carefully Marco had played Eva’s rescue. Her son never played impulsively unless the odds were somewhat in his favor. They knew that Edriss would die, and Eva would be saved.
Edriss did something in that moment, something she had never really done before. She opened up the connection between them, and let Eva see through Edriss’s brain in the way Edriss always could Eva.
In the height of her starvation induced insanity, Edriss’s memories were scratched and imperfect. Human faces had crooked Gedd teeth or blood red Taxxon eyes or had no faces at all. Sound was distorted, mixing with memories of Eva’s own Edriss induced screams. Languages were were a harsh, unnatural, jumbled mess, but because Edriss understood them, Eva understood.
Eva saw Edriss seeing a blue sky and feeling sand whip across her face. She felt the unspeakable pleasure of writhing beneath Hildy Gervais and knowing he was Essam. She felt the hardly suppressed joy of those increasingly rare moments when ten-year-old Marco would put his head in his almost-mother’s lap. Through it all, she saw two ever shifting images, two faces that Edriss was desperately trying to build with her tortured, fragmented mind.
She saw Darwin, and she saw another young girl, and it did not take someone of Eva’s abilities and wit to figure out that she was Madra.
Edriss couldn’t quite give her exact addresses, but Eva managed to pick out street names through the flickering images. She picked out street numbers, and she saw the city maps Edriss showed her, and she figured it out.
Edriss managed.
Eva replied.
–
Edriss had send her twins to two separate places, both far from Santa Barbara, but not too far. She still liked to visit them. Through Edriss’s jagged memories, Eva learned she would take temporary hosts, then pose as some sort of teacher or doctor or friend and talk to Darwin or Madra. This explained away Edriss’s odd day trips. At least once a year, Edriss would tell Peter and Marco that Eva was going to some kind of retreat with her friends. Then, she would find some guileless junkie in the seedier areas of the city, and convince them to get in Eva’s car. She would then go to a Yeerk controlled gas station, drug the addict, and blindfold herself. One of Edriss’s trusted lackeys would drive them to some cabin. There, Edriss would set up a television with a feed to the outside of Eva’s house. She would explain that the house was set up with explosives, and if Eva tried to run and attempt to find her way back to Santa Barbara, her lackey would wait until both Peter and Marco were home and hit a button. Eva would always, always promise to behave. Edriss would wash her new host’s body, make it presentable with make-up and expensive outfits, and leave.
This would continue even after Eva’s “death,” though the temporary host was often presented to Edriss by the lackey rather than Edriss risking getting caught out in the city herself. Eva watched what happened to her bright, beautiful boys in the aftermath of her false death. Edriss found joy in her pain, and once bugged the inside of Peter and Marco’s apartment, just to torture Eva more. They ended up moving, and Edriss never found the time to bug the new place. Then, Peter got his shit together, and Eva started delighting in Marco and Peter’s progress. Eva never bugged their new places. If she had, the Animorphs would have been found out within weeks. To this day, Eva freezes with the nearness of it all.
When Edriss returned to the cabin and reinfested Eva, she would kill the temporary host. Eva knew the blood on her hands didn’t really belong to Eva, but her nightmares didn’t.
—
Edriss was obviously going to infest Darwin and Madra one day, that much was clear. But Edriss wanted to control the infestation, make sure that her children were given to high ranking Yeerks that Edriss trusted. That was why she found parents that lived so far away. When Eva thought back to it, she had a feeling Edriss was priming two of her subordinates to take Darwin and Madra, a Sub-Visser Forty-Nine and a Umlash 979. Edriss had always a strange and sickening parental attachment to those two. She forced both of them into human hosts, even if Umlash had a strong attachment to Hork-Bajir. Edriss would occasionally call one of them into her quarters simply to talk, or to give them a gift, or to offer them sweets. Once, she forced Sub-Visser Forty-Nine to lay xir head in Edriss’s lap, and Edriss stroked xir hair while singing in Korean.
Gom semariga hanjibe isseo. Appa-gom, eomma-gom, aegi-gom.
Eva could still hear her voice singing tunelessly, her tongue perfectly enunciating words in a language Eva did not recognize.
Eva had never understood it, but neither had her chosen surrogate children. Eva could feel their hesitance, sense their bafflement, but somehow Edriss could not. Eva suspected Edriss turned off the connection she had to Eva in those moments. She was living out some fantasy, and Eva did not belong in it.The first and only time Eva had mocked Edriss for these meetings, Edriss silenced Eva with drugs, pumping their body full of hallucinogens and then disconnecting herself from the effects. Eva never said anything about it again.
–
At first, Eva did not want to find Darwin and Madra. They were not her responsibility, because she was not Edriss. Edriss was her captor, her slaver, and she had said goodbye to her when she crushed Edriss in her hand. However, after a few months of perfect strangers seeing her and breaking down in grocery stores, Eva accepted that Edriss was part of her. It was not a happy acceptance, but it was an acceptance that would allow Eva to move forward with her life.
Eva couldn’t shake the idea that if Edriss was part of her, then so was Alison Kim, and so were her children. While Eva doubted her ability to help Darwin or Madra in any meaningful way, she knew Eva herself would never feel truly at peace until she tied that loose end. They were not her responsibility, but without Alison or Edriss, no one would ever take responsibility for them. They were not her children, but they would grow and they might wonder about their birth mother, and Eva was the closest thing they would ever have.
She wouldn’t speak to the kids. She would, however, set up some arrangement with the parents.
-
It was happenstance that the Yeerks had found Darwin at all. As it turned out, Darwin’s mother wanted to pursue television writing, so Darwin’s father got a job at the University of California Santa Barbara. They moved to a suburb somewhere between LA and SB. The commute was killer, but there weren’t a lot of colleges that needed a professor of medieval literature, so Darwin’s father took the Santa Barbara job with grace. Darwin’s father was the sort of young, hip college professor that drew trust from his students, something an unfortunate controller managed to zero in on. It was child’s play to use The Sharing to draw Darwin’s father into The Pool. Darwin’s father became Avis 2771, and Avis was fond of taking Darwin on walks. One day, a man stinking of unwashed clothes, urine, and liquor approached them. It would have been annoying but otherwise unremarkable if the man had not directly asked Avis if he was a Yeerk.
Avis took the man home and got as much of a coherent story from this “Spacey” as he could. Between Spacey’s half sentences and the fact that his mouth was the same shape as Darwin’s, Avis managed to piece together some of the story.
Avis went to Visser Three immediately, hungry for a promotion. They infested Darwin, and formulated a plan to use Darwin against Visser One. Avis became Sub-Visser Eighty-Seven.
By the time Eva found the family, they were all in post-Host recovery. They had all gone through it, and were very supportive of one another. They had moved closer to Santa Barbara to allow Darwin access to other post-Host children.
They were doing everything right, and that warmed Eva’s heart. It was more than she could say for her own family.
—
She set up a meeting with them through the school, making sure she saw the parents without Darwin. She knew the sight of her would be a bit much for a ten-year-old child.
“I know you know who I am,” she said calmly. “And I know you know the origin of your son. You may also know by turning on the television at any given moment of the day that my son is currently making me more money than I can spend. Would you like a college fund for the boy? Perhaps a new house?”
Darwin’s parents agreed to the college fund, but said they were happy with their current home. They didn’t want to disrupt Darwin’s life too much. They told her Darwin didn’t really understand his parentage, and that his memories of being a host were spotty at best. Eva was more than happy to hear it.
—
Madra was harder. Madra had been sent to a sweet but dangerously naive family, the sort of family that defined themselves by white fence standards and didn’t seem to have soul. Eva hated the mother especially. She was the sort of woman Eva would meet at her old churches, before she found a community that truly understood and delighted in the pure joy of Jesus. These women were more into the idea of absolution than they were in living the radical Word, and Eva had never liked them. She could see hypocrisy in the woman’s exact shade of Stepford red lips, could read lies in the shape of her eyebrows. This woman had probably stood in front of her church and proclaimed God told her to adopt, and most likely found more joy in the attention for her “sacrifice” than she found joy in the actual child. Eva had a feeling that if she tried to tell this woman her adopted daughter was the product of a sick Yeerk marriage, the woman would simply call the police. The father wasn’t much better. He made ball-and-chain jokes about his wife, and spent as much time away from his spouse and their children as he possibly could.
She would need a different tactic. She would also need a different face.
—
She thought about asking Marco. She knew her son had a few alternate human morphs, and she didn’t blame him. Her son couldn’t walk outside without getting mobbed these days, and if he had the ability to disguise himself beyond a wig and sunglasses, Eva was all for it. Only she knew he wouldn’t like that she was finding and supporting Edriss’s lost children. Marco was far, far more sensitive about Edriss than Eva. Eva had lived through being infested, and she found power and healing in being frank about it, because she had been in her mid thirties and had decades of experience to hold her up. Marco had lived through a hell of his own, with all of thirteen scant years to help him. He tried to bury his nightmares by acting like it had been a fun adventure. When Eva spoke about Edriss, Marco bristled. Eva understood why, and knew that forcing him to think like her wasn’t going to help him heal. She just made it clear she would support him, and when Marco did open up, it was always to her. If she wanted him to continue to open, she had to never, ever tell him about Darwin and Madra.
So she called Jake.
—
Marco never shut up about how Jake never returned his calls (and his tears over the situation were one of those rare moments he only showed his mother) but Jake got back to Eva almost immediately. Perhaps because it was very, very odd for Eva to reach out to Jake at all. They had been close before the infestation, but after Eva’s “death” and their shared time in the Hork-Bajir Valley, they weren’t exactly on speaking terms. It wasn’t malicious, it was just that Eva tried to reach out to Jake multiple times, but between her lack of stability and his, every outreach ended up awkward and went nowhere.
Still, she had been Auntie Eva, and sometimes she had even beenmom, so Jake returned her call. When she explained the situation, Jake immediately agreed to help. There was a sort of desperation it, a need to give what he could to those affected by a war he didn’t start, but accepted blame for. Eva would have contacted Jean about it, but Jean was afraid of her these days, and all Eva could do was wait it out.
Eva fed him a story, and Jake fed it to Madra’s mother. Jake appeared as himself, which was much easier for Stepford Mom to swallow than Eva would have been. Jake was a good guy in the invasion story, and his face was only associated with stories of triumph. Eva’s face did not have the same association.
Jake (through Eva) spun a tale of a sacrificial woman who aided the Animorphs when they needed her most, who had made Jake promise to help out her daughter and her son. Madra was delighted at news of a long lost twin, the secret fantasy of nearly everyone. Jake agreed to set up trust funds not only for Madra, but for her two siblings (biological children of her adopted parents.) It was a happy story, full of closure. The family took pictures with Jake.
—
Darwin and Madra met for the first time in a McDonald’s. Madra taught Darwin how to dip fries into a milkshake. They played in a ballpit, giggling and free
Eva was there, in her wig and sunglasses. She whispered to Darwin’s parents, and they agreed not to tell Darwin and Madra the truth until they were eighteen.Eva didn’t plan on finding out how that went down.
I did what you wanted me to, bitch, she thought to a blissfully empty place inside her. Your children are happy and safe. Now rot.
#animorphs#zarohk#eva#madra#darwin#yeerk horror#I don't think I technically put up the ten headcanon meme#but I did reblog someone's about Jake#so I think that's what this is????#if it's not if it's some other thing I reblogged#bro I'm so sorry#I'm so sorry about the way I am#but so many of y'all can send me asks I'm so here for it
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My EP!
After seeing a couple of posts about Milanote I got curious; the screenshots looked intriguing, and you know how it is with people and shiny things...
I truly have unholy amounts of love for Scrivener, but there have been times that I’ve had to go outside the program to visualize a plot problem in order to solve it. I looked at Milanote and thought, “Why not?” So I signed up for a free account.
I sat there a minute looking at the blank canvas thinking, okay, now what am I going to use this for? I looked through the templates and I thought...yes! One of my B-level characters is working on an EP and one of the A-level characters is very much involved, so thought I’d tool around with that for a bit to get a feel for the app.
After looking through the Board templates, I chose the Product Management >> Customer Journal Map for my project because I liked the way the boards were set up. A word of warning: these boards are highly customizable. You can play around with them for hours.
After I picked my template, I used an online album title generator because it takes me waaaaaaaaay too long to come up with that kind of stuff on my own -- my brain starts spinning in too many directions. I shortened the title I finally settled on, and it was perfect.
If I used an album title generator, you know I needed a song title generator as well. I clicked and clicked for a bit before I finally got four good titles that were perfect after tweaking. One of them I absolutely love, and it will be perfect for the single my characters release.
Since you can’t add text to pictures in Milanote (not that I’ve seen anyway), I found a picture for the album cover and used the markup tools on my laptop to add the title to the cover, then uploaded that simple graphic to my template on Milanote.
In total I have seven elements in the main board for the EP:
The main character who’s involved and a breakdown of his responsibilities.
The cover.
The track listing, which includes writing credits and song length.
Guest artists; who did the artist ask to join them? What happened then?
Album production; at a high level, what’s involved.
Album promotion; at a high level, what’s involved.
Album credits, including studio, label, engineer, producer, and a list of artists and their credits.
If anyone thinks that visualization is useless or a waste of time, I can assure you that it isn’t. Even though this little album and things around it are already being featured in my story, I started brainstorming while filling in the details for this visualization. I already had at least one name who’d be asked to be involved, but..who else? I went to wikipedia to check out known associates and wow, now I had a whole host of folks to choose from, some I wouldn’t have thought of who are SO, SO PERFECT.
Then you ask yourself the classic question: What happens next?
I don’t have a checklist for album production or promotion except the loose details in my brain, so that’s what I’ve got in my little boards. I wasn’t looking to create a technical manual on how records are produced, I just wanted to corral my thoughts concerning what would happen in my fic, and when.
I love it so much.
You can export boards as standard and high quality PDFs or a PNG image. I tried all three, and they all look great. So that I’d have the info in my story bible, I screenshot the various elements and loaded them up to Scrivener. I’ll post my boards in a bit.
What a time to be alive.
#milanote#super self-indulgent self-insert fic#tools for writing#visualization tools#holy crap so far I'm loving this#my ep!
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