#just something i thought about and felt like it was impirtant to me

[uncanny-tranny]

Your life isn't a to-do list. You're allowed to exist, to take life as slow as you'd like. The dreams you have won't suddenly disappear. It's okay to stop and smell the roses, or to engage with "childish" things, or to recover, or do what you need to.

[bee-s-honey]

OMG ITS OK😭😭💗💗 I’ll just try to remeber what I wrote- headcannons for kurapika developing a crush on a person in the dark continent arc? Like the person stays with kurapika for like two years as like a helper. Kurapika and the person are just friends at first.🥺 They meet at the exam and he and the person help each other through it to the dark continent arc- and kurapika starts to realize how important they are to them and all- and he starts falling in love with them- or like finally knowing he’s in love-💗💗 sorry if it’s confusing😭 I tried to remember what I wrote I’m so sorry

Yes this is perfect thank you so much 🤍 I have no idea why your apologizing though cuz I'm the one who fucking deleted it on accident 😭😭(づ￣ ³￣)づ

And I wrote so much for it but now I have to do it again because of me. Anyway-

Kurapika started gaining the feelings around late late yorknew arc, but at the moment his head was so filled that he started trying to ignore it, but it took a toll on him the entire time that he did. he would not be able to sleep because normally in order to sleep he would think about how happy he is that he had you- he felt like he had nobody, and in order for him to sleep he has to think about the things that make him happy, you. But after realizing his feelings were more romantic than just friendly it felt so wrong to even think about you and he stopped, making it hard to fall sleep happy or feel good about much. Thoughts about you running into his head we're like cute puppies that kept nibbling at his ankles, he didn't really want to get rid of them, they made him so happy, but the fear of losing you- the thought that he wasn't worthy of loving you- the exhaust of now having even another thing to think abott-all of it made him want to push it all away.

He went through a long period after YorkNew. He began ignoring you. The both of you met up maybe once but then he tried to keep his distance. That just made everything worse, So he decided to actually try and start regularly hanging out again because he felt that you deserve to not be left in the dark no matter how hard it was to be around you when he flt like he was taking up space. Eventually you both get on to the black whale, and this is where it starts.

He's already been through the stages of what I call the 'oh god I like them' realization, first there was very realization itself then a quick spout of denial followed by leaving you because he felt he was not worthy of being in your presence the more he began to think about you. However after realizing how terrible it was to just ghost another person he just wanted so badly to be around, he started liking your company again on the black whale.

Feelings have only grown deeper now, and signs are starting to show- he gets so protective and to some it would even be insulting. You already know so much about him since you've helped him starting at the hunter exam. You and the other three are really the only people who completely know about his missions, his thoughts, etc etc (you know a little more than the others of course since you've been with him the entire time and he has told you the most out of all) so he's not stupid- he knows you know everything that's going on, but still he protects you from it. When you ask about Tserriednich (probably didn't spell that right) he will just change the subject completely. Maybe by asking you to go to the bar and get a drink or telling you to go to sleep because he thinks you need some rest. From there on he refuses to give you any information on his missions or what he's doing because he genuinely doesn't want you to get any more involved with the potential that you'll get hurt.

Eventually protection leads to heightened jealousy when it comes to people that could be putting you in danger. on the black whale no one's ever completely safe and he gets skeptical when someone looks at you too hungrily- what used to be a quiet man when jealous becomes a petty snob to the person who's talking to you, but it's just at them not you- aggression is toward others who could be putting you in danger.

If a man were to seem suspicious while asking you something or trying to have a conversation he comes up and rests a hand on your back- one even a little too high for a friend, like he's so nervous about touching you that he suddenly doesn't know what to do anymore- he'd say something to the guy to make a point of introducing himself into the conversation, then making sly petty comments until the poor fool goes away.

But don't worry, he has good judgment. This wasn't a normal guy, Kurapika knows what he's doing and knows a sneaky prick when he sees one. Now a simple need for seeing you somewhat safe is a running theme of making sure you're never hurt, that you are the most ok out of anyone else- and gods it's hard- having to deal with Wobble and everything as well as now trying to shield you from the contents of this ship to hell.

Kurapika would also start wanting to be closer to you more often, he'd hold your arm as you walk down the hallway, or purposefully scoot his seat closer to you at a table you both ar sitting at. He always has a great scent on and his presence(while full of stress itself) brings you peace. It's like a thin veil of light energy, he sometimes doesn't even pick up on how much aura of devotion he puts down around you.

But there is one day, one day- and it's so rare that probably in a million other realities it wouldn't have happened like this, where he feels both too brave to ignore the constant feeling of warm flower petals in his stomach and he's too scared of somehow loosing you that he comes to you and admits his feelings

And- it's adorable. He has a deep red blush which nobody has seen forever since he masks every emotion so well now, and his eyes look deeper than ever. He's worn by years and months of connection to a single person as well as just wanting to get what he thinks will be a rejection over with- but his eyes hold something so remenisant of purity. O course you express how you feel the same he'd get so happy, barely being able to show it, but grabbing your hands and having a smile you hadn't seen since the hunter exam.

Being in love, for him, and realizing it most of all, would be both a blessing and a curse. A white rose of beautiful fluttery feelings with blood of stress dripped on it, and especially for someone he'd only met at some exam. Something so built up could not be expressed subtly and would explode in a wave, all happening in maybe a couple minutes, and you get to see him unfold. By the end it's nothing but stress relief and at least a couple more things to be happy about.

More things he does when realizing how important you are to him:

-he normally looks behind you when facing you. He's a very direct person and when speaking to everyone he has a non-impirtant, far off eye contact, but he just can't with you. He can't give you that fake look he gives everyone, and he looses the real one so he just decides to not look directly at all

-CONSTANT "what do you rhink about this situation" "what do you want to do" "well what's your opinion"

-he always thinks in the shower and refrains from thinking about emotions or feeling at all otherwise so every night he just constantly pretends almost like practicing talking to you, and forgets it the next day because he finds that too embarrassing

-king of not understanding how to make up for anything so he just buys you things. Like when you're having dinner on one of the ship restaurants in his head he thinks just completely paying for it himself is better than just talking to you. But it is endearing

- you CANNOT trip. Catches you every time.

-to make conversation he points out or tries to talk about the gross parts of the ship. People throw up all the time, or if he's breaking into a room and there's weird stuff, because what else is there to talk about

-despite the fact that in general falling in love on the black whale and with the situation he's in calls for angsty situations he always finds ways to be unintentionally amazing.

-he remembers small things too, maybe not a lot, but your favorite meal at the main eating area in the ship, or where you keep notebooks or toher objects in your room.

-he'll actually be invested when you start talking about something you like or showing him unlike how he is with almost anyone else

-he makes sure to have a soft caress in his voice like and well he's not going to be super smiley when hanging out he's not going to have a blank dead look on his face. And that's just amazing in itself.

-he just wants to protect you from harm, and while he really wants to think about you all the time, that's a little hard with such a guilty conscience that can't even indulge in anything good.

-but far into the relationship he gets so lovey and I'd love to write that for you if you ever want to ask

[trilies]

Hi! Same anon, i meant the last part of that ask saying it was an unhealthy coping mechanism wasnt impirtant, not the entire ask itself. Sadly because im autistic im unable to form a lengthy discussion because im very bad at correctly writing down my thoughts. I just want you to think about it you know! This isnt meant as rude, i just want to help people realize that even though the content they create could come somewhere from themselves, in the end it still hurts people if left unchecked

Oh, I can totally understand if long drawn out conversations are a problem for you. I feel a little bad now, ha ha, because I am very clearly the exact opposite if my conversation with keigophobic wasn’t clear. I have a tendency for rambling.

I understand where you’re coming from, but I think labeling it as an “unhealthy coping mechanism” is just as incorrect as labeling it a “healthy” one. It’s very context dependent, very reliant on the individual.

For me, writing was very healthy. It allowed me control and understanding over the situation that I never had as a child. It allowed me to explore sex, but in a safe way where I was never actually in harm.

(I think in the current climate, I might have spiraled into a lot of self hating, because I was a CSA victim, but still felt sexual feelings? I must be a Terrible Human! ...something like that.)

For another person, however, it might be the worst thing for them at that time. But that’s where a tag on a fic would help, warning them away from something that would be harmful.

Going back to your other ask, it is true that there’s a possibility a rape fic I write (as an example) could appeal to an actual shitty rapist. But... there’s also a chance that a fellow victim could read it and feel some measure of relief or understanding or... anything. So in the end, what’s the right answer?

I don’t think there is one. Like I said, it’s a difficult and complex topic. Which is the frustrating thing, huh? Trust me, I don’t want to be here either, ha ha!

[elejah-wonderland]

Original pic from instagram posted by@idkhaylijah,

but I cropped it for this one shot. I hope you are not mad at me.

💟💟💟

GO YOUR OWN WAY

Fanfiction

a/n: this is just a one shot fanfic inspired by this picture of Dg. And a song from Fleetwood Mac 😀

AU, set after Elijah has his memories erased, travelling through Europe. Months after Klaus killed Antoinette.

Pairing: Elijah Mikaelson x reader

Warning : Fluff, but 18+ - vampire blood drinking mentioned.

Thanks for the inspiration @idkhaylijah 😀

Tag '@dendrite-lover

💘💘💘

Elijah felt lost. For months he had been travelling around Europe. Never stopping long in any place he found himself in. He hated himself, the world, his family. He wished he never found out he was a Mikaelson, and all that was attached to it.

Now in the 2 star hotel room, he looked at himself in the mirror. He was far from the Original vampire, who once wore pristine tailor made suits, nearly always clean shaven. He let his hair, his beard grow long, wore ripped jeans, flannel checkered shirt.

Taking a deep breath, he now took the scissors and cut his hear short. Then his beared, but not all of it. He left it at short length. He was not ready for a complete change. This bohemian look suited him. For some reason, he felt this alter ego comforting. Picking up a blue tweed-suit jacket from the chair, he went out into the night.

He loved roaming around the streets of the old parts of the cities he would found himself at. He would drink of a passer by, but as his sister Rebekah showed him, he would not drink too much, and he sure would compel the person afterwards.

Having let the blonde woman go, he had just had drank from, Elijah wondered into a bar, a few alleys further. Barcelona was a place he came back several times. Something about it was magnetic. This was maybe one of those places he could stay for a tad bit longer. Maybe.

Now, he sat down at the bar and ordered a beer. As he turned around to now concenteate and listen to the band playing, he saw a woman, who he had lived across from the hotel. Twice he found himself watching her as she sat on the tiny balcony, sipping coffee in the morning, reading a book obviously basking in the autumn sun. She was a vision of beauty. But to him and his tormented heart just something illusive. He thought. She now took to the stage, greeting everyone present. The guitarist, who clearly was her friend stood up, saying thanks for her gracing everyone with this special appearance.

"Thank you for your invitation, Cacho " - Y/N said, adding-"Ok. This is a cover from an old song I've been listening to lately a lot. It's Fleetwood Mac- Go Your Own Way-I hope you like it."

You turned to your friend indicating you were ready to start.

Elijah, who was a lover of all jazz and classical music, playing piano himself masterfully, lately had been enjoying listening to live bands playing 60s and 70s music. He had not yet dwelled further into the pop stuff. Now, listening to you singimg and the words floating to him made his old heart jump up a beat.

Loving you

Isn't the right thing to do

How can I ever change things

That I feel

If I could

Maybe I'd give you my world

How can I

When you won't take it from me

You can go your own way

Go your own way

You can call it

Another lonely day

You can go your own way

Go your own way

Tell me why

Everything turned around

Packing up

Shacking up is all you want to do

If I could

Baby, I'd give you my world

Open up

Everything's waiting for you

You can go your own way

Go your own way

You can call it

Another lonely day

You can go your own way

Go your own way

You were singing it from your heart and the emotions coming from it went right through Elijah. He looked at you mesmerized. Every other song that followed cut deep into him. He could not remember when he last enjoyed a performance like that.

Finishing the sat, and thanking the great cheering you got from the crowd, bowing a little, giving all the accolades to the band you went to edge of the bar were Elijah was standing, asking the bartender for a Clara Beer.

"You were amazing" - Elijah now shot at you, and you looked at him smiling-

"Thank you. It wasn't that great. I was a bit wobbly at the beginning."

"You are selling yourself short" - Elijah said-"You are the best I have ever heard and I really mean it."

Sippinga bit of a drink down now, you looked at the vampire saying-

"If I didn't know better, I thought your compliments are mulding into a smooth 'coming on to me'"

"Ok - sorry if it came across like that, but - I will not deny - that - I will now get in trouble I see" - Elijah curled up an embarrasing smile somewhat.

"If you invite me for a harmless cup of coffee and croissant in the cafe across from your hotel, you will not be in trouble." - you said.

Elijah looked at you surprised now. Getting another sip of your drink, you said-

"The window of your hotel is across from my room. Sometimes, I can't sleep and write. And I saw you gazing at the moon like - all night - you couldn't sleep either, right. I totally get it. Barcelona is magical, nighttime or daytime."

Elijah nodded. He didn't want to go into details about him being an ancient vampire, who didn't really need too much sleep, if any. He now turned to a more impirtant issue and that was the invitation to coffee-

"Would you like to have coffee and croissant with me?"

"I'd love to" - you said.

"I'm Elijah" - the Original now introduced himself.

"Y/N. Nice to meet you Elijah" - you said adding-"I have a confession to make."

"Oh!" - Elijah now looked at you even more surprised.

"Two, actually. I - the hotel manager is my friend and we got talking, so I asked him about you. I am sorry if this sounds creepy and weird. I thought you were an artist, because I thought I saw you months ago doing a graphitti on one of the garage doors of Barrio Gotico. He said no. He told me that you always stay at his place. And that once you played the piano in his friend's bar. "

"I don't do graphitti, but yes, I play the piano. And I have played it at his friend's bar last time I was here." - Elijah admitted-"what's the other confession?"

"You play a role in one of my short stories I am writing. I put that scene you gazing at the moon, but the character name is Daniel, but I think I will change it into Elijah" - you said.

"You are a writer and a singer. Multitalented"

"I am so much better at writing than singing."

"Well if you write as good as you sing- I am already a fan"- Elijah said.

You chatted some more and not long after you both walked to your repective residences, talking about why Barcelona appealed to both of you so much.

"Ten o'clock?" - Elijah said as he walked to you to your door.

"Eleven?" - you said.

"Eleven it is." - Elijah said.

You both now smiled awkwardly for some reason, you glancing at the full moon that now seemed to wink at you. Elijah looked up at the grand round bright ball in the sky.

"I don't know what it is but it so inspires me, even though I can't sleep when it's a full moon."- you said.

"It's got magical properties according to folklore" - Elijah now said turning his look to you.

Y/N looked at him, now gulping as his eyes stared deep into hers.

Elijah wetted his lips a bit, now gulping himself, searching for approval in your eyes that had already sunk in a glistening haze. Making a slight nod with your head, you felt his hand now cup your face. Leaning now towards you, feeling his lips on yours. It was magic, the way his lips connected with yours. His mouth was warm, the caress of his lips softer than you could ever had imagined. Pulling you to him, he now deepened the kiss making you let a low muffled moan out. His lips, his kiss obliterated your every thought. You were up there dancing with the stars around the moon. Drawing out of the kiss, he gazed at you lovingly, his eyes softening with such tenderness that made your heart race up. Gently tapping with his thumb on your chin, he smiled at you a little, uttering-

"See you in the morning"

You nodded slightly, and still with stars in your eyes, waching him now walk away across the road to the hotel.