#keep an eye out for incoming memes *eye emojis*

[delicrieux]

—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER

extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 

pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao

author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao

ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist

You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.

A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?

Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.

A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”

mother i crave violence

sensing evil energy rn!!

i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖

^with peace and love shut the fuck up

“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”

You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”

Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.

“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 

rip headphone users

i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears

yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭

To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.

Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 

queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?

Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie

akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.

Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.

There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.

The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.

nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!

^pack it up girl defined

“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”

You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 

“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 

i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 

shes trying give her time

ya dig??? y not capeesh

what scene from the godfather is this lol?

“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.

Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎

You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”

The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.

Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:

I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.

You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.

“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”

NOW she considers it

well....

if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3

Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”

Onto the bio:

You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up 😜 

“What the fuck did I just read?”

The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.

The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 

But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.

No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.

“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.

WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????

tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be

^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell

look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling

It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.

What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.

Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.

YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 

...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.

You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.

“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.

“What?” She grits.

“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”

“What did you do now?”

“I made fun of men on Tinder.”

She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”

“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”

“Y/n.”

“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”

She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.

Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.

You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(

my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?

Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 

Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!

You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?

my husband Not jealous.

Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”

He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!

my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.

You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao

my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?

You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs

my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)

Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.

hope you liked it!! xx

[come-on-shitty-boys]

// green hearts. kuroo tetsurou //

Warnings: kuroo’s like . . .  hella mean?

Word Count: 1.45K

Notes: inspired by this fake fic by shitty.  also i finished assassination classroom last night and LISTEN I KNEW IT WAS COMING BUT THAT DIDN’T STOP ME FROM SOBBING wow my heart hurts

Usually the chime of your phone was easily ignored, but even he couldn’t help but get the tiniest bit frustrated when that small ding stole your attention away every few minutes, a cute smile on your face as you raised your phone up to snap a quick selfie.  And it would’ve been fine.  Kuroo had always stood idly by as you flirted and talked with other guys, being your shoulder to cry on whenever your heart was inevitably shattered into a hundred pieces.  He was there to help you type out responses and laugh at the boys who thought “Hey” was a good enough opening line to get your attention.  Kuroo was that friend.  The best friend who was always down to listen to your girl problems, who had a steady stock of tampons and Midol in his club room locker just in case, your meme supplier and the one person that you would have trusted with your entire being.  Yes, Kuroo was your best friend and that’s all he could ever want to be.  

Well, that’s what he always told himself anyway.

But, it was your phone alerting you of yet another Snapchat that finally drew his eyes down to your screen.  You snatched it up so quickly, clutching it to your chest as if you were doing something that you shouldn’t be.  If that wasn’t enough to raise his suspicions, the way your eyes kept darting towards him every few seconds while you tapped out a response, each glance only making you seem to shy further away from him. 

“Who’s in your DMs this time?” The remark was teasing enough, a simple question that he’s asked dozens of times, but this time your response was different.  Your normal giggle as you would sidle over to him so you could show off an Instagram profile was only replaced by a shake of your head and nervous laugh as you rubbed the nape of your neck.

“It’s no one.”

“I’m pretty sure someone is blowing up your phone.  Come on, show me!  How am I supposed to scare him o- I mean- help you talk to him, if you don’t at least give me a name?”

Kuroo scooted closer to you, but you only slid away from him, the grip on your phone tightening even as it alerted you of an incoming message.  “Kuroo, really.  It’s just some guy.”

“Well, yeah.  But, you at least have to tell me who.”  His hand reached out to gently pull your phone screen towards him.

He wishes he hadn’t.

Snapchat from Daishou Suguru 💚

Kuroo’s normal teasing smirk fell before he even had the chance to catch himself.  A hardened stone settled in his stomach and no matter how hard he tried, there was no overlooking it.  He wanted to smile, pretend to be happy for you, put on his usual smile and laugh and tease you about your new beau until the day would come when it would all come crashing down around you.  But, he couldn’t even bring himself to say a word, let alone push a fake smile.  

Really?  Of all people, you chose him?  Had Kuroo really taught you nothing about that sneaky bastard?  He was a manipulative, lying snake who was just going to throw you to the side when he got bored.  He didn’t care about you.  Not like-

Kuroo couldn’t keep that scoff away. His entire being felt heavy, head pounding at a rhythm steady with his heart.  He was sure that if he dared to open his mouth, he wouldn’t have anything good to say to you.  Kuroo felt his fists clench, nails digging into the palms of his hands as his jaw squared.  

“You’re mad,” you state.  

Of course he was mad.  He was angry and frustrated and- and, well, he didn’t really know.  He did know that he couldn’t stand the thought of Daishou Suguru being anywhere near you.  That snake holding your hand, smiling at you, kissing you?  Kuroo could have thrown up his lunch right there at the mental image of you and the one person that he hated most swapping spit.  What was even so great about him?  Daishou wasn’t anything exceptional.  He wasn’t that tall.  He didn’t have an impressive physique.  He was smart, but there were definitely better options.  Kuroo just couldn’t wrap his head around what the hell you were seeing in someone like him. 

“I really like him, Kuroo.  I know that you two have beef, but come on.  He’s really a good guy.  He’s one of the sweetest guys that I’ve ever talked to.  You’re my best friend.  Please, just let me try to be happy, even if it is with Daishou.”

He had never felt more hurt.  Hearing you utter that he was your best friend felt like someone had just taken a knife and sank it hilt deep into his chest, leaving him to bleed out on the floor.  That’s all he was to you.  That’s all he ever would be to you. Kuroo Tetsurou was simply your best friend and that’s all he would ever be.  But, as time continued to tick on by, he found himself hating that idea more and more.  He didn’t want to be your best friend.  He was already the one that you ran to when you were upset, but he wasn’t the one who would sit you in his lap and kiss the top of your head to tell you that everything would be okay.  He wasn’t the one who got to send you sweet good morning and good night texts with heart emojis and cute pet names.  

“He’s just using you, you know that right?  The second Mika says she wants him back, he’s going to forget about you,” Kuroo says, leaning his head back so he didn’t have to see the way you physically flinched at his words or the way that your whole body trembled as you shrank further into yourself, becoming smaller than a meer field mouse.  He leaned his head back so he didn’t have to see your heart shatter into a thousand different pieces from his words.  

“Y-you don’t know that.”

He rolled his eyes, a bored expression painted across those features that you knew so well.  “He doesn’t want you.  He wants a distraction.”

“Kuroo-”

“Daishou doesn’t give a shit about you, but if you don’t want to listen to me, that’s fine.  Just don’t expect me to be there when he hurts you.”

Your phone buzzed again.  Another Snapchat from Daishou to tell you to have a good rest of your school day, that he would talk to you when he was done with practice, that maybe you guys could call tonight if you were free, to remind you that he really did like you, signed with a simple green heart emoji.  But all of that didn’t matter to Kuroo.  He didn’t care what the Nohebi captain said to you, it didn’t change that undeniable overwhelming sense of envy that completely and utterly consumed him.  

The bleachers creaked as you stood and the weight shifted, each step only bringing another groan from the wooden seats.  Kuroo finally looked at you, a completely defeated shell of who you used to be.  There was no smile that would push a matching one to his own lips.  You weren’t laughing and leaning into his side.  No, you were walking away from him without another word, your phone clutched to your chest, eyes focused on the ground because you were sure that if you looked anywhere else, everything would come pouring out.  

Kuroo Tetsurou was your best friend, but he had wanted to become something more for a while now.  Watching you walk away from him without so much as a goodbye?  He was sure that he had ruined any relationship that he had ever had with you and any chances of pursuing something further.  He was so busy trying to convince you that Daishou Suguru would be your ultimate heartbreaker that he didn’t even realize that he was causing you some of the greatest pain that you had ever felt all because he was in love with you and his bitter rival just had the balls to tell you how he felt first.

The green heart was the ugliest emoji that Kuroo had ever laid eyes on, but there was nothing else that better described him.  A heart filled with twisted green flames of envy, a horrible sight really.

[somethingvaguetodo]

Signals Crossed

It's hard to balance two identities, especially when you are trying to do it all on one phone. Read on AO3 here

EDIT: Now with a second part!!!

Ladybug sat on the roof of the Palais Garnier waiting for Chat Noir to arrive for patrol. She was in the second minute of her deep breathing exercises when her yo-yo chimed with an incoming message.

Her eyes flew open to read Alya’s response. Unsatisfied with what it said, Ladybug chewed her lip as she thought about how to answer.

Marinette was having a crisis. Exactly 36 minutes earlier, she had received a text message from Adrien Agreste. The message read:

Hey Marinette! I have a photo shoot scheduled for Saturday and I just spoke to Père. He said it’s okay if you want to come along! Are you still interested?

In her panic, Marinette had screenshot the message and forwarded it to Alya, who told her to respond immediately and accept. Marinette, however, knew it was better to wait to respond so that she didn’t look desperate. Alya’s disagreement had continued past the time she needed to leave for patrol, so she was continuing the conversation from the rooftops.

I want him to think I’m cool and I have a life Answering in a minute does not show him that at all

Ladybug pressed the M icon at the top of her screen and sent both messages.

A few months ago, she and Chat had been playing around with the settings on their communicators when they discovered this capability. Chat was hoping to find a way to connect to Wi-Fi so he could start an official Chat Noir Twitter, but instead found a way to add another phone number to send and receive calls and messages. She had jumped at the chance to merge her two phones, but Chat didn’t.

“Honestly, m’lady, I love that you are the only one who can contact me when I’m transformed,” he had said with a wink.

Marinette had rolled her eyes and immediately added her civilian phone number. It made it a lot easier to cover herself and back up her excuses if she could contact Alya and her parents when transformed. All she had to do was be careful to choose the correct sender - Marinette, not Ladybug - when contacting them. Tikki had been nervous about the potential for making a mistake but Marinette knew better. Tikki was wise, but she was also old, and knew nothing about technology.

Marinette grew up with phones, computers, and tablets. She had this handled.

Alya had responded: It’s been what, a half hour? That’s long enough M

Ladybug rolled her eyes, but had to admit that Alya was right.

Chat Noir touched down beside her as she was typing her response to Adrien.

“One second, Chat. I’m making plans for the weekend.”

Chat groaned, and sat down beside her. “See this was why I didn’t like this, Ladybug. I’m trying to figure out my weekend plans too but I left my phone at home and will see later if my friend answered.”

Ladybug refused to look at him until she finished typing. “That’s good for you, Chat.”

Hey Adrien!!! I’d love to come to the shoot!! x

She sent it to Alya to make sure it sounded casual enough before copying it into a new message to Adrien. Alya’s response to add a kissing emoji went unacknowledged.

Ladybug reread the message twice to make sure there were no spelling errors. She made sure there were a different number of exclamation marks after each sentence so Adrien didn’t think she was strange or overenthusiastic.

Once she was sure it was perfect, she looked up at Chat and pressed send.

“Done!” she announced with a smile.

Despite his exasperation, Chat smiled back. “Excited for those plans?”

“Yes!” Now that she had finally sent the message, Ladybug could feel the excitement overriding the anxiety. “Oh, Chat, this is going to be amazing! I’ve literally dreamed of this happening but didn’t think it ever actually would!”

Chat’s smile faded. “Ladybug, do you have a date?”

Ladybug’s eyes widened in surprise. “What? No!” Then she thought about it. “Well, I guess it could maybe be thought of as a date...” She trailed off, the anxiety coming back. She grabbed hold of Chat’s arm and squeezed it tight. “Oh gosh, Chat, do you think he thinks it’s a date?!”

He studied her closely, oddly serious. “Would that make you happy?”

Ladybug nodded rapidly. “Very happy.”

“Well in that case,” Chat said, “I hope he does think it’s a date.” At Ladybug’s surprised look, he chuckled. “I just want you to be happy, LB.” Ladybug felt herself warm up, a blush dusting her cheeks. Chat’s smile turned mischievous. “Besides, I know we’re endgame. This will be a fun story to tell our grandkids one day.”

Ladybug rolled her eyes and shoved him. “Come on you crazy cat.” She pushed herself off the roof to stand, tossing out her yo-yo and pulling the string taunt. “Race you to L’Arc de Triumph.”

Chat Noir dove through his bedroom window, releasing his transformation as he went and landing in a forward roll on the floor. Plagg spiraled out of his ring, moaning for cheese. Adrien picked himself up and walked to the bed, collapsing on his back.

He still had to complete a chemistry worksheet, shower, and change before going to sleep, but he could afford to rest for a few minutes. He picked up his phone from where it was charging on his nightstand and scrolled through his notifications.

There were a number of unread text messages, but he looked for Marinette’s name first. Adrien was disappointed to see that she hadn’t responded to him yet. He was really hoping that she would come this Saturday to his photo shoot.

He went to respond to Nino when he noticed one new message from a number he didn’t recognize. In fact it wasn’t a normal number at all.

0000M0000C0000 SMS message

Convinced that it was a scam or robo-message, Adrien ignored it in favor of answering Nino.

After sending a message, he swiped out of Nino’s thread, intending to check and make sure his message to Marinette went through. On the main page of his message app, however, he could read the beginning of the message from the unknown number.

0000M0000C0000 Hey Adrien!!! I’d love to come to...

Adrien looked at it, chewing his lip as he decided what to do. It was clearly from someone who knew his name, but a scam could have found that out. If it was a scam, it would be better to ignore it. But it could also be something important, or something Nathalie or Père scheduled that he would get into trouble for ignoring.

Deciding the curiously would kill him if he didn’t look, Adrien opened the message.

Hey Adrien!!! I’d love to come to the shoot!! x

The message sounded like it came from Marinette. He was expecting a response from her about a photo shoot, and she often signed her messages with an x.

But unless Marinette bought a new phone with an unconventional number, it couldn’t have been from her.

Something about the number was bothering him, and he took another look.

It wasn’t so much a number as a string of zeros and two letters. He doubted it was coming from a phone. Maybe an IP address? Or an e-mail? One of his fathers’ colleagues had tried to send an e-mail to his phone number and it came out strange.

Deciding to find that old message, Adrien scrolled back through his thread, watching names pass by before something caught his attention.

0000M0000D0000

He pressed it. It was a series of unanswered messages, but Adrien recognized them all. They were reminders he had sent himself: things he had to do before going to bed, homework that was due the next day, people he was supposed to reply to. But he had sent them all from Chat Noir’s baton communicator.

Adrien’s heart was pounding, but the conclusion he was jumping to couldn’t possibly be correct.

“Plagg,” he called out, and the kwami appeared with a wedge of Camembert clutched in his paws. “Can you take a look at this?”

Plagg floated over, and Adrien switched back to the message from 0000M0000C0000.

“Could this be from Ladybug?” he asked, trying to keep his voice light.

Plagg glanced at the screen and shrugged. “You know I don’t understand all of your computer stuff,” he whined.

Adrien fiddled with his phone, trying to decide what to do. He finally gave in to his impulses.

“Plagg, claws out!”

Chat Noir sat on his bed, cross-legged, and took out his baton. He opened the messaging app. There were only six conversations: Ladybug, Queen Bee, Carapace, Rena Rouge, his cell phone, and the one time he tried to message Hawkmoth only to discover that he had deactivated that feature.

He clicked on Ladybug’s. There were a series of important messages about akumas and patrols, jokes, and silly memes usually sent by Chat. He navigated to her contact card.

Her face smiled out at him, information below the photo.

Ladybug Miraculous 0000M0000C0000

Chat stopped breathing.

He held his phone up beside the baton and compared the numbers to make sure they were exactly the same. They were.

He released his transformation with an exhale, his baton disintegrating from his hands. Adrien was left sitting on his bed, phone in one hand and frustrated kwami landing in the other.

“What was that for?” Plagg asked.

Adrien decided it would be best to logically present the data he had accumulated. “I got a message from a strange number, that I now can see is actually Ladybug’s yo-yo. The message was addressed to Adrien, which means that Ladybug knows me as Adrien. It was about coming to my photo shoot, and only Marinette would be sending me a message about a photo shoot.”

Plagg blinked up at him. “So?”

“So,” Adrien echoed, his voice calm and measured, “Marinette is Ladybug.”

They both let that statement sit between them for a moment. Then Adrien started hyperventilating.

“Marinette is Ladybug! How didn’t I notice that before? It’s so obvious! Ladybug is Marinette!” Adrien dumped Plagg unceremoniously onto his bedspread and leapt up, pacing the length of the room.

“So Ladybug sends a text to Adrien, but she thinks that she is Marinette sending a text to Adrien. But she isn’t, she’s actually Ladybug who is also Marinette who is texting Adrien who she doesn’t know is actually Chat Noir and was right next to her at the time.”

Plagg watched him. “Sounds about right.”

Adrien ignored him. “Ladybug isn’t interested in going out with Chat Noir, but Ladybug who is Marinette said that she wants the guy she was texting to think of their plans as a date. And Ladybug was texting Adrien.”

Adrien turned to Plagg, his hands tugging at his hair. “Which means Marinette wants to date Adrien, if I haven’t lost track,” Plagg finished for him.

Having reached the windows, Adrien rested his back against one and slid down to sit on the floor. “Which means Ladybug wants to date Chat Noir,” he said, a smile blooming on his face. “She just doesn’t know it yet.”

Adrien started laughing, and found he couldn’t stop. Now that the shock had worn off and the information was starting to sink in, he felt a little delusional. This couldn’t actually have happened, could it?

Plagg shook his head. “How are you going to tell her?”

Adrien thought about it, and suddenly a grin spread across his face. “This photo shoot is going to be fun.”

[seagreen-meets-grey]

When you’re close to me

After the realization hit her, it was impossible for Astrid to look at him the same way anymore. (Aka being a teenager and having a crush on your best friend is the best set-up for prom night.)

[Part 1: Revelations] [Part 2: Chicken Dance] [Part 3: Night Owls]

(The quoted song is “Sway” by Blue October.)

Crossposted on ao3 and ff.net

Astrid didn’t know exactly when it started.

She remembered lunch in the cafeteria, trying to squeeze in some homework, and a slightly nasal laugh when the math equations didn’t make sense to her and she let that out in a menacing tirade under her breath. She remembered wondering why it had pleasantly filled her ears, why it had made her look up.

She remembered standing in the school’s hallway shortly after last period, students jostling around, a cacophony of girly laughter, loud testosterone-filled exclamations and the general buzz of conversation surrounding her. She remembered turning away from her locker, ready to head out, and catching a glimpse of auburn hair in the crowd. She remembered smiling and waiting for him to catch up to her so they could walk out together.

She remembered her smile growing at every new text, remembered her sudden awareness of how much fun it was to hang out together.

But most of all, she remembered that one Saturday before finals.

It had been a busy couple of weeks, crammed with last-minute papers and presentations, long nights filled with caffeine and frustration. She was nothing but an ambitious student, always determined to ace every test coming her way, to prove herself and excel in every subject. Astrid Hofferson had goals, and she’d do everything in her power to reach those goals. That meant a very rigorous studying schedule, no distractions allowed. That again involved not being able to see her friends outside of school. She had no time for smoothies and movies, for afternoons in the park, the cove or on Heather’s couch, and certainly no time for Hiccup Haddock. Which sucked, because he was her best friend – the best she’s ever had, if anyone asked her.

She had first met him in kindergarten, but never really had had anything to do with him. Only when they got paired up for a project in freshman year – the classic way of getting to know people you never talked to – and after the initial rounds of awkward silence, did she have a real conversation with him. Up to that point, she had thought they couldn’t be more different people and that she couldn’t be less interested in the person that was Hiccup Haddock. But when he mentioned his dog with a missing tail and she told him stories about the parakeet she’d had as a kid and the puppy she had recently adopted, the conversation just kept flowing. Not always smoothly, but that didn’t matter. She liked talking to him. She found out he had a strong passion for what he loved and what he thought was right. He deeply cared for the people in his life and would do anything for them. Besides, it turned out they shared a lot of interests, and that made becoming friends even easier. And being friends with Hiccup was just that – easy. It was as if they clicked on another level, able to read each other like a book. There was no one who Astrid rather spent time with. He always made her forget about her troubles, but unfortunately finals – and therefore studying – were her troubles at the time.

Astrid groaned and buried her face in her physics textbook. She was lying on her stomach on the ground in her room, every surface covered with binders, notepads, textbooks, post-its, and index cards – the aftermath of a whole Saturday morning filled to the brim with studying, right after a short few hours of sleep preceded by a Friday afternoon and night study session.

Her brain was overflowing with equations, bullet points, half-sentences and phrases that refused to fall into context. The more she read and reviewed the less sense everything made in her head. Astrid sighed. She needed a breather. Placing her textbook aside, careful so the post-its didn’t shift out of place, she reached for her phone. She lay on her back and, holding her phone above her face, skimmed through various group chats. They all basically said the same; people were either studying or procrastinating, asking for help in several subjects, and the overall vibe screamed for salvation in the form of finals to be over already or a distraction of any shape or form.

Astrid was just grinning at a few memes sent by the twins when her phone suddenly buzzed several times from incoming texts, prompting her to drop it on her face.

Hiccup [11:48am]: your brain melted yet? i think i’m seeing smoke signals coming from your house

Hiccup [11:48am]: or did you try to make lunch and the house is burning down

Hiccup [11:48am]: do i need to call 911

Hiccup [11:49am]: where are your parents

Hiccup [11:49am]: omg did you finally snap from all the studying and killed them?

Rubbing her aching nose where her phone had met her face a moment ago, she typed back.

Astrid [11:50am]: Who do you think I’m cooking? ;)

Hiccup answered with a series of shocked emojis. Astrid grinned and imagined him placing a hand on his chest, pseudo-shocked look on his face. She rolled back onto her stomach, eyes set to the little dots indicating he was typing.

Hiccup [11:51am]: tbh i’m not surprised

Hiccup [11:51am]: always knew it was just a matter of time until someone died at your hands

Hiccup [11:52am]: how did you do it? axe or feeding them your version of an edible meal?

She could easily picture him gesticulating, waving his hands around, never able to keep them still while talking. It was kind of charming.

Astrid [11:52am]: Axe, of course. My cooking might be basic, but it doesn’t kill people.

Hiccup [11:53am]: biggest

Hiccup [11:53am]: lie

Hiccup [11:53am]: ever

Hiccup [11:53am]: hofferson

Astrid was about to reply when another text came in.

Hiccup [11:54am]: HOLY SHIT IS THAT WHY YOUR STEW WAS SO BAD? WHERE YOUR NEIGHBORS IN IT???!!

She rolled her eyes. A few months ago, she had made dinner for her friends. She had tried to follow her mother’s recipe but with her own twists, wanted to create something new, something originally Astrid – and, apparently, had succeeded. Only that her friends were rather spitting it back out on their plates than praising her cooking skills. The only one who at least tried and gulped down a few spoonfuls was Hiccup, and she loved him for it, despite the following teasing she had to endure.

Astrid [11:55am]: Shut up, Hiccup. I’m trying to study here.

Hiccup [11:55am]: how’s that going

Hiccup [11:56am]: have you even eaten anything yet

Astrid sighed. At his mention of stew, her stomach had growled viciously. Aside from half a croissant early in the morning, she’d had nothing to eat yet. She’d been so absorbed in studying that she hadn’t even noticed her parents leaving for their shopping day. Just one more chapter, she told herself while reopening her textbook, then she’d look for something to eat in the kitchen.

She put her phone away, not giving Hiccup the chance to further tease her on the subject of food. She would never admit this to him, but he was right. Astrid didn’t know how to cook, no matter how many cookbooks and articles she read, no matter how often she tried even the simplest meals. She was a lost cause. This was the reason why her motivation to look for something edible wasn’t necessarily high. She knew for sure there were no leftovers, and the fridge was likely mostly empty anyway; her parents would buy groceries at the end of their day at the mall.

Forcing herself back to her textbook, she pushed the notion of food to the back of her mind. Soon she was buried deep in her notes, trying desperately to press new information into her brain. When she stared at an equation and the numbers and symbols started dancing all over the page, she groaned in frustration. She needed to know this stuff by next Friday, and there was still so much more to revise.

She got up and went to the bathroom, filling the sink with cold water which she then dunked her head in several times. But it was of no use, it wasn’t ice water, of course this wouldn’t work. The only thing it did was to make her aware of how thirsty she was. While towel-drying her hair, she trudged down the stairs to grab herself a bottle of water. A quick check of the fridge confirmed her suspicion that there was basically no real food in this house. She found a few crackers in the cupboard and resigned herself to her dry excuse of a lunch when she heard the bell ring.

Bag of crackers in hand, she went to open the door and was greeted by a pair of familiar green eyes and a lopsided smile.

“Hey,” Hiccup said. His hair was as tousled as always and she noticed he was wearing an old green sweater that he only dug out on lazy weekends. Astrid didn’t have to ask if he had opened a textbook at all today.

“Hiccup, you’re smart,” she said in lieu of a greeting. “How do I restart my brain?”

Following her into the house and stealing a few of her crackers, which earned him a ferocious glare, he shrugged. “That’s exactly why I’m here.” He threw a cracker in his mouth and nearly missed. “I read the smoke signals.”

Astrid gave him a punch on the arm. “That’s for wasting my last food ration. Now I’m going to starve!”

Rubbing his arm, he motioned his head toward his car that was parked outside. “Then let’s go get some food.”

She crossed her arms, empty bag crinkling in her hand. “I can’t. I have to study.”

“We both know you’re not going to come far like this. Come on, I know you need a break.”

Astrid sighed. They both knew he was right.

“And something to eat,” he added when her stomach chimed in on the discussion. “See? Now let’s go before you kill and eat me too.”

Astrid bit her lip. She knew he wasn’t going to drop this. And a short break from studying could surely recharge her concentration.

“Alright,” she gave in with a sigh and put the bag in the trash, grabbed her jacket and followed Hiccup back outside. “But I lied, I didn’t cook my parents. They’re out shopping.”

“In that case, I’m even more scared, in such proximity with you when you’ve clearly not yet let out your daily dose of violence.”

“It’s not violence,” she protested, “it’s communication!”

“If it is, people should even be more afraid of you. You have some strong opinions.”

Astrid grinned and shut the car door. “Hell yeah, I do.”

“So communicate with me then,” Hiccup said while turning onto the street. “What do you want to eat?”

“Anything that’s not a dry cracker.”

“Or stew.”

She punched his arm lightly and he glared at her. “I’m driving here, you insane muttonhead.”

“You’re the muttonhead,” she retorted brightly before plugging his stereo cable in her phone and selecting their special car playlist. The songs that made it in were a bunch of shared favorite songs, songs they listened to on longer car rides together, songs that had a special meaning to them, or songs that were some sort of inside joke between them. They referred to it as their car playlist, but Astrid thought of it only as her Hiccup playlist. Whenever she felt down, she listened to it, finding comfort in the memories it held and the promise of their friendship that came with it.

While the music blasted through the speakers, Hiccup hummed along.

“How did you know?” Astrid asked as he turned onto the main road.

“Hm?”

“That I needed a break from studying.”

Hiccup glanced at her before turning his eyes back on the road. “Like I said, I read the smoke signals from your brain. I call it,” he made a grand gesture with one arm, “Astrintuition.”

“That’s not a thing, you dork.”

“It is now, I just named it.”

Astrid looked out the window to hide her smile. Of course he knew. He knew that she would spend her entire weekend preparing for finals and that she’d prioritize that over everything else. That’s why he decided to come by and make sure she ate something and still saw the sun. A fond feeling spread in her chest.

They ended up at Pizza Hut where they shared their favorite pizza, a Cheesy Crust Chicken Supreme. Hiccup watched in awe as she devoured slice after slice and when he exclaimed that he was stuffed, she ate the rest of his half too. She might not look like it, he thought, but that girl could rival his father when it came to eating. Astrid was so busy with her pizza that she missed the affectionate look he gave her.

On the way back to her place, the sun came out. It hit Hiccup’s hair at just the right angle to create a fiery halo around his head. Astrid rolled down her window to enjoy the warm breeze.

When their playlist jumped to a loud and fast song, Hiccup amped up the volume. He and Astrid automatically started duetting, jerking their heads along to the fast parts and swaying in sync to the slower ones. It had taken them a lot of tries to finally get all the lyrics right in the proper pace, and even now one of them sometimes fell out, provoking a snort from the other while they spluttered to jump back in.

Astrid loved moments like these. It was her and Hiccup, a team, enjoying each other’s presence. When the song faded out, their last chuckle dying down with it, she propped up her elbow and leaned her head on her hand. She closed her eyes, felt the wind in her hair, on her skin. She smiled when she recognized the next song, her favorite from three summers ago. Silently mouthing the lyrics along, she got struck by a feeling of utter contentment, accompanied by a swelling in her chest while familiar, memory-laden streets around her where dipped in sunlight.

Forget about the trouble Forget about the drama Cause I ain't Casanova Baby I can dance for days This time with you Is just amazing in so many ways

She looked over at Hiccup who slightly bobbed his head to the music, his eyes on the road, a small smile gracing his features, the sunlight dancing in his hair. She couldn’t stop looking at him. It was as if she was suddenly seeing him with new eyes. She felt a swoop in her stomach. In the light, she could make out slight stubble on his chin. His fringe and thick eyebrows cast shadows over his face. She had never really noticed how handsome he was.

Feeling a blush heat up her cheeks, she averted her eyes. Well, this is new, she thought.

For the rest of the day, she couldn’t really concentrate on anything and fell asleep much later than usual, confusion and strange new revelations keeping her awake until early in the morning.

From then on, she noticed the little things. The small touches that were suddenly too much, the glances, the dragged-out goodbyes, the increasing frequency of hugs that tended to linger a moment too long. She wondered why she had never noticed how green his eyes were, how much taller than her he had grown, or how broad his shoulders had become only in the last year.

Every day, she noticed it, noticed him more. And it only got worse over time.

When he looked at her, her heart skipped a beat or two. He invaded her thoughts regularly and often in the most inconvenient moments, like when she wanted to sleep or needed to pay attention during class. Astrid was in no way a sappy romantic. But every time the topic of love or romance was brought up even in the slightest, her mind wandered to Hiccup, much to her chagrin. They were friends. She didn’t want to ruin that with sudden, stupid feelings.

Eventually, she came to admit to herself that she had a crush on him (just a small one really, no big deal). It was when her grandmother asked for a nice photo of her and Astrid sorted through her pictures on her laptop. After an hour or so she suddenly noticed she had moved from looking at pictures of herself to staring at pictures of Hiccup instead.

It took her a while to come to terms with it, before she tried to block it out and hoped it went away on its own. When that didn’t work, she changed tactics. Going out with someone else would certainly help her forget about her crush. But whenever she tried to find a guy she’d go on a date with, the qualities she looked for in them were traits she associated with Hiccup. In comparison to him, everyone else quickly faded into the background.

By the time she gave up changing targets, she could no longer deny to herself that this crush was indeed not small at all. And her plan to not tell anyone so that it couldn’t become a bigger deal than it was – and it really was a big deal – failed spectacularly when Heather caught her staring at Hiccup from afar and asked her if she ever noticed how she wouldn’t shut up about him. Astrid tried denying it at first, but there was no fooling Heather.

“Hiccup this, Hiccup that. Astrid, you couldn’t be more obvious.”

Sometimes, though, Astrid was glad that Heather knew. She would do her all kinds of little favors, like “accidentally” forgetting something in her locker when the three of them were on their way to class, saving Hiccup a seat that happened to be right next to Astrid, or cancelling at the last minute when they decided to go to the movies so Astrid and Hiccup were to themselves. Although Astrid loved her for doing that, it didn’t help her frustration about her one-sided crush.

Heather, however, had a different opinion. She believed that Hiccup had feelings for her, too, based on the way he acted around Astrid. Despite her hopes that her friend was right, Astrid nevertheless argued that Hiccup had always been like that since the beginning of their friendship; Heather just hadn’t been there to see it since she’d come to their school later. Besides, Hiccup was the one always stressing that they were friends (best friends, but still just friends). Heather would just look at her like she was missing something obvious.

Time went on like this, with Heather always trying to nudge Hiccup and Astrid in the right direction and telling her to just talk to him or make a move herself. And it’s not like Astrid didn’t try. She gave Hiccup signals all the time, like shuffling closer and leaning against him while they were watching a movie, dropping comments here and there about the two of them together, touching him on the arm or chest or hand whenever she got the chance to – not that she minded at all – and even going out for ice cream on Valentine’s Day. But either he didn’t notice the signs, like the dork that he was, or he read them wrong. And there was still the possibility that he wasn’t into her at all – a notion Astrid hated but had to admit could be true.

Her frustration got especially bad when prom rolled around. While she normally wouldn’t even think twice about the ridiculous need to find a prom date that other girls seemed to have, a part of her still hoped Hiccup would ask her while she tried to work up the nerve to ask him herself. But whenever she opened her mouth to bring up the topic, she chickened out. If she asked him and he said no, she didn’t want that to affect their friendship, didn’t want to jeopardize whatever it was that made their whole dynamic so easy and comfortable. And it wasn’t like she needed a prom date to have a good time with him, anyway.

She kept going back and forth with her reasonings, caught between her idea of simply having fun with her friends without conforming to high school society norms, and the inevitable pull Hiccup had on her, creating her desire to be close to him, closer than she was now. And she just couldn’t find a solution.

Astrid was sitting in the cafeteria, picking at her vegetables, while she glared daggers at the girl who was currently talking to Hiccup on the other side of the room. The girl was tall, blonde and pretty, and she had her hand on his arm while she threw her hair back laughing at something he said.

“I know cafeteria food is awful, but even those peas don’t deserve what you’re doing to them,” Heather said next to her, watching as her friend tortured squashy peas and radiated jealousy like a miniature Chernobyl. When Astrid only grunted in response, Heather sighed. “Just ask him already. I don’t know how much longer I can take this unnecessary pining.” She snorted. “Or Snotlout.”

Astrid rolled her eyes. “Don’t remind me.” She’d been asked to prom nine times by now, eight of those by Snotlout (the other one by an overachieving freshman named Gustav).

She cut into her steak, pretending she wasn’t secretly watching Hiccup and that girl. Her plate made a horrible sound when she got through the steak and ran her knife over the cheap china. She and Heather cringed at the bloodcurdling noise and Astrid mumbled an apology.

When she looked up the next time, that girl was gone. Hiccup came towards their table with his food tray and sat down opposite them.

“That’s the fifth time this week that I’ve been asked to prom,” he said. “Is there some kind of prank going on?”

Astrid scowled. She only knew about three. “If there is, I’m going to kill the person responsible,” she mumbled and chewed on her steak. Hiccup frowned at her sour mood but didn’t comment on it.

“Hiccup, do you even know how popular you are?” Heather asked him. “And you’re an eyecatcher. Girls notice you.” Hiccup looked at her as if she’d grown a second head. “It’s true, just ask Astrid.”

Astrid almost choked on her (awful) steak and felt Hiccup’s eyes burning through the side of her face. “Yeah well, kind of,” she stammered, fighting the blush growing on her cheeks while she avoided his gaze, “I mean, everyone gets more handsome when they grow up, not specifically you, but everyone, you know, which doesn’t mean that you didn’t, I mean… You’re fine, I guess.” She shrugged and stuffed half her steak into her mouth so that she couldn’t start rambling again like that.

“What Astrid’s trying to say here is that I’m right.”

A quick glance told Astrid that Hiccup was still frowning at her weird behavior. “Are you alright?”

She gave him a strained smile and swallowed the ball of dry meat in her mouth. “I’m fine.” He didn’t seem convinced but didn’t question her further either. Instead, he went back to complaining.

“I just can’t catch a break from turning down prom invitations. Which I most certainly never thought I’d ever even have to do in the first place.”

Heather took from that that he’d immediately said no to all of them. A smile grew on her face as an idea crossed her mind. This was a perfect opportunity.

“Hey, why don’t you guys go together?” she asked, looking back and forth between Astrid and Hiccup. Both of them simultaneously started to protest.

“It’s not like that.”

“We’re not… It’s not…”

“We don’t date.”

“Yeah, that’d be weird, because we’re just–”

“We’re just friends.”

“Yes, exactly.”

They were both blushing pretty hard, avoiding each other’s gazes. Heather rolled her eyes.

“Then just go as friends. That means you,” she pointed at Hiccup, “will be left alone by all those girls, and you,” she pointed at Astrid, “will get Snotlout off your back.”

Astrid pondered that for a moment and came to the conclusion that she liked that thought. She and Hiccup shared a look.

“Alright,” he said and gave her a lopsided smile. “Wanna go to prom?”

She tried not to break into a wide smile while she felt the familiar tingle in her stomach. “Sure,” she shrugged and went back to eating her cafeteria food which suddenly didn’t taste so bad anymore. Hiccup did the same, suppressing a grin himself. Heather just shook her head at them and sighed. Hopeless dorks.

[gail-hq-archive]

INVOLVED: Gail Weston and Casey Rose @casey-hq

DATE & TIME: 14 August, 2019

LOCATION: Casey’s apartment

SUMMARY: Kisses and cuddles I guess.

WARNINGS: None.

Gail had been trying to distract herself from the fact that she was texting Casey by scrolling through Tumblr for some mindless stupid memes. It's not like she's staring at her phone waiting for a reply. Pfftt, that's absurd, Gail Weston doesn't wait for anyone's text. She thought as she tried very hard not to swipe down from the top centre screen to check for another notification. It was stupid, putting her phone on Do Not Disturb when she's trying to text someone - and she never puts her phone on DND! So when Casey replied, finally, it only took her ten minutes and twenty two seconds, not that Gail was counting, it unnerved Gail to another level. It was dumb to pretend she wasn't nervous, but at this point in time, Gail might as well be dumb. 

She yelled at the bedroom and told Connor that she was going out and practically burst out the door. So here she is, standing in front of Casey's door, wearing a pair of bunny slippers and not knowing what the fuck she was doing there. How dare Casey text her and basically order her to come over? Gail was an independent woman who takes order from nobody. Not to mention she was smoking hot and had people lining up vying for her attention. Who does Casey think she was? OKAY, so Casey might also be stupidly hot and cute, like who the fuck allowed someone to be both hot and cute at the same time? Gail glared at the door as though it had personally offended her. She should just leave, she had no business being here. What did she even wanted to get out of this? A kiss? Maybe? Probably? Most definitely? So instead of moving, Gail just allowed herself to stand in front of a door in the middle of a corridor, looking like an idiot.

Things with Gail had proven to be a little complicated and very confusing. One moment they were fine, talking like the acquaintances that they were about a month ago. Then she slapped Marley and everything got turned upside down and in a fit of overprotectiveness and rage, Casey had retaliated and had slapped Gail - though she’d immediately felt horrible for it. Then they’d become... friends, somewhat. Casey loved to bother her and buy her lunch, stealing glances when Gail wasn’t looking and noticing the faintest hint of a smile, especially when she hung out with Nala. It was different from her usual demeanor - serious, a frown and furrowed brows. Gail seemed lighter and carefree, and Casey couldn’t help but wonder how often she actually looked and felt like that. 

And then Gail kissed her. It was nice, of course, her lips were soft and the brunette was offensively gorgeous. No one should be that attractive; it truly was offensive. Gail had avoided her afterward and Casey had an inkling as to why, especially since Gail had been intoxicated when it happened. Casey wanted to do it again, of course. Sober. So when she texted Gail that she was free, she half expected Gail to say maybe another time, but she didn’t. And by the looks of Nala’s perked ears, tilted head and curious sniffing, someone was outside her door. Casey waited for Gail to open the door, sitting down on the couch and wondering how long it would take. I don’t bite she texted Gail after a few minutes, then added, Unless you want me to.

Gail had given up on keeping her phone on DND when she kept checking it for the umpteenth time back when she was still at Connor's. It might've been a giant mistake on her part because when it pinged for a new incoming message, Gail knew she was busted before she even checked who it was from. Looking down at the texts, she wanted to curse Casey's name right there and then. No, actually, scratch that, she wanted to punch this stupid door and then maybe punch Casey because she's probably sporting some infuriating smirk right now. But then again, her face was too pretty, so maybe not. 

Grumbling lowly to herself about the unfairness of this whole situation, she grind down on her teeth, stiffen her shoulders and spine, took a hell of a deep breath, and...… 

Couldn't do it. 

Gail jabbed at her phone and sent a message to Casey, because she started this, so she might as well see it through - not Gail.

‘come open ur stupid door 😠’

Although Casey wanted to remind Gail that she'd left her door open and she could just come in, she decided to go easy on the brunette, quirking an eyebrow at the adorable use of the angry emoji and gently placing her phone face down on the coffee table. Was Gail Weston nervous, perhaps? A smirk pulled at the corner of her lips at the thought, feeling as if it was some sort of ego boost even though there was no confirmation about whether or not that was the case. Was it unusual to wonder what Gail was wearing? Was she still wearing one of her work pant suits, or had she changed into something significantly more comfortable? Was she sporting the same look as the emoji, annoyed with Casey even though the blonde technically hadn't done anything... yet. 

 When she finally opened the door, she was met with the brunette still standing at her door, her phone in hand and looking somewhat... flustered? Or was she actually nervous? Casey wasn't sure. "I told you I don't bite" she smirked, moving a bit to the side so Gail would come into her apartment. She couldn't stop thinking about kissing her dumb lips, but she figured it was best to do it behind closed doors and not in the middle of the hall.

The moment the door opened, Gail glared up at the offending blonde on the other side. How dare she look so beautiful even at night. This should be illegal. This is more of a threat to her safety than a broken glass bottle. She had almost stuck her tongue out at Casey when she got cheeky. Unbelievable. 

Clad in a loose flow-y chemise and some Capri length tights, which probably worth more than Casey's monthly salary, Gail huffed her way into the apartment; making sure to shoot the blonde another glare for good measure. 

Once inside, the first thing Gail did was to greet Nala and picked her up for a hug. The little puppy doesn't deserve her ire, she only deserve happiness and cuddles and scratches. Turning on her heel, she pursed her lips and looked on at Casey. "I'm here, now what?"

Casey, of course, had eyes and she couldn't help but check Gail out as she walked into her apartment - smirking because she'd definitely noticed that glare that had been shot her way. Honestly, fucking sue her for checking out her ass in those tights. Biting back a chuckle, she closed the door behind them and watched as Gail picked up Nala, eyebrow quirked as her demeanor changed... somewhat. She was still a little wary and a little defensive, almost using Nala as a shield. 

Shaking her head, Casey gently took Nala from her arms and softly placed her on her bed, giving her belly rubs before she made her way back to Gail. "Now what?" she asked, repeating what Gail had asked. She took a step close to her, slightly amused at their height difference. It wasn't much, but it was still noticeable, especially in an instance like this. "Do you want to do this?" she questioned quietly, wondering if she was still into it. The whole point of it was that Casey wanted to do this sober so there were no regrets; she was just curious if Gail still felt the same.

Gail almost whined when Casey took Nala away from her. But instead, she crossed her arms and looked forlornly at the puppy. This is animal cruelty. Humans are animals, and Gail's a human - most of the time, when she's sober and awake. Now that Gail's without her Nala buffer, she's feeling a little self conscious. What exactly did she expect to get out of coming to Casey's apartment? Did she just wanted to talk? What would they even talk about?Clearly not about her activities last weekend. Does Gail really want to talk about kissing Casey? Sure, the blonde is cute and pretty, and for fuck's sake, why does she even have to smell nice too, and it's a no brain-er that Gail would want to kiss those sweet lips again. 

So what's it going to be, Gail Weston? She challenged herself as Casey stepped closer to her. Gail might have to tilt her head slightly upward to look at Casey in the eyes, but she has the bigger personality here, and the bigger presence. Damn this beautiful tree of a woman. "Do... what are we doing?" She said sidestepping the topic of the night.

Casey quirked an eyebrow, wondering if she now had the upper hand. Sure, it wasn't a game, per se, but Casey loved being in charge and right now... well, she felt that she was. "What did we talk about doing?" she whispered, taking another step toward Gail and softly cupping her cheek with her right hand. She frowned, knowing that she'd hurt her there a month ago due to her feeling anger toward her, having flashbacks to Marley being bullied and Casey fighting the girls who'd hurt her. Marley was too pure and too gentle; she didn't believe in physical violence, but she'd cry at their words and Casey wasn't above hurting them for what they'd done to her. To Casey, it'd been like that - Gail had hurt Marley, so Casey had to retaliate by hurting Gail. Unfortunately, Gail had been hurt in the process as well and as Casey softly ran her thumb along her cheekbone, she silently apologized for the role she'd played in that situation. 

"I want to kiss you" Casey admitted as her blue eyes bore into Gail's, the faintest of smiles had pulled at the corners of her lips. "And if you don't stop me in the next five seconds, I'm gonna do it. I'm giving you an out. You can say no. But if you don't..." she trailed off, the smile now morphing into her signature smirk.

Gail furrowed her brows and continued to stare at Casey. She was severely at a disadvantage here. She's already shown her hand of wanting to kiss Casey, and then she willingly came over to her place all because of... what exactly? She knew better than to be tempted by handsome men and pretty ladies, so what makes this so different? Maybe it's because this infuriating woman shares the same face as Marley Rose -- who was also to knock Gail's world out of kilter? That couldn't possibly be it. It'll have to be something about Casey... But while Gail was trying to figure out the reason why she's so intrigued and captivated by Casey, said blonde was now literally inches away from her face. Now all she could focus on was the gentle caress of her cheek and those lips right in front of her. 

Fluttering her eyelashes, Gail didn't move an inch. She wasn't going to stop Casey but she's also not going to be the one to make the first move this time. Once was enough, and it didn't even went all that well. She flitted her gaze between Casey's eyes and lips before settling onto just looking straight at her, trying to disguise the fact that her heart was beating overtime in her chest and that as of this moment, she wants nothing more than the promised kiss.

Five seconds passed and Gail hadn't moved, she wasn't stopping Casey, she wasn't doing anything but waiting for Casey to make the first move. This was something that the blonde was more than okay with - she enjoyed being in charge of these situations, so she was glad that she did have the upper hand here. Her smirk grew as the seconds continued to pass, adding to the anticipation and Gail's wait. Finally, her eyes drifted from Gail's eyes down to her lips, her hand continuing to cup her cheek. She was still waiting, taking her time before she finally leaned in and captured Gail's lips with hers.

It started out soft and gentle... a lot like the kiss they'd shared a couple of days ago while Gail was inebriated. But it was also different because this time, Casey was kissing her... and quite possibly letting out the softest of moans as the kiss gradually became a little more hungry and Casey's other hand found Gail's waist and she quickly pulled her body flush against hers. The height difference didn't bother her, but there was a part of her that wanted to take this to the couch. Who wouldn't want a hot girl on top of them, right?

To say Gail was tense when Casey pressed her lips against her own was an understatement. But it only took a moment before her eyes shut responsively where she sighed and relaxed into it. She had let out a soft moan when Casey pulled her tightly into her arms, she only made her appreciation known by deepening the kiss. It was far too soon before the contact was gone and Gail was left reeling from it. With her eyes opened again, there was Casey looking at her with that same stupid grin on her face. 

Gail had no idea that a similar but albeit more demure smile was also painted on her own face.

Casey bit back a grin when they pulled away and she'd caught Gail smiling. Eyebrow quirked in curiosity and slight amusement - and slight cockiness as well - Casey grabbed Gail's hand in hers and led them to the couch where she sat down and looked up at Gail. Tilting her head, she challenged Gail, wanting to continue this here and now. "C'mere" she whispered, smirking, challenging her to straddle her or to at least sit down next to her. The night was still young and though this hadn't been on her plans at all at the beginning of the night - really, this hadn't been on her radar due to how Gail had been avoiding her, she couldn't help but want just this for the rest of it. 

"C'mere" she repeated with a little more urgency, beckoning for Gail to join her.

Pouting at how she was caught smiling like an idiot, Gail dragged her feet on her way to the couch. She stood between Casey's legs and stared down at the blonde. At the first beckon, Gail folded her lips over her teeth and shook her head. It shouldn't be this easy to get Gail to surrender to someone, so she's going to do everything she can to make it difficult. But God, it is hard. When Casey repeated once more, Gail stood contemplatively for a moment before she kneel on the couch, effectively straddling Casey. She kept her weight on her knees whilst she place her arms on Casey's shoulder. "I'm not a dog." She said lowly, looking down at Casey.

Gail could be a little stubborn, a little difficult, so Casey couldn't help but grin triumphantly when she finally relented and knelt on the couch. Gail was almost straddling her - almost, but not quite. "I never said you were" Casey smirked, enjoying the position they were currently in, but wanting to feel Gail's weight on her. Keeping her eyes locked on Gail's, she placed her hand on her waist then slowly moved it to her ass, gently guiding her so that she would be more comfortable on top of her. "I just wanted you on top of me, is that a crime?" she asked cheekily, her other hand tucking a strand of hair behind Gail's ear. "Are you going to punish me?"

Casey needs to die. That's it, that's all there is. But if she wants to play then it's only fair that Gail gets to join in on the fun, Gail refuses to be toyed with like a pet's toy. She leaned her head forward as though she's going in for another kiss but just as their faces were only millimeters apart, she stopped. "It's not punishments if you enjoy them," She nipped at Casey's bottom lip. "So why should I bother?" Gail pulled away and promptly sat down onto Casey with as much force as she can possibly muster. With her hands now resting at the nape of Casey's neck, she played with the shorter tendrils of hair there. "I hate you."

"True" Casey acquiesced with a nod, adding, "there are more than a few punishments that I'm pretty sure you'd enjoy." Though she loved that Gail was feeling comfortable enough to tease her - especially when she nipped at her lip - Casey was itching to take control of the situation. She would be nice, though, and allow Gail to think she had the upper hand for the time being. "You don't hate me" she shook her head, sitting up and leaning forward, both of her hands now on Gail's waist, "you just hate that you love this as much as you do." Casey pressed her lips to Gail's neck then her jaw, "And that you couldn't leave right now even if you actually wanted to because you want this as much as I do."

Instinctively, Gail tilted her head away to allow Casey more access. She hates Casey, so much. So freaking much. So she may be just a little into this whole thing that they're doing, but it's only because... because Gail is trying to erase the fact that Connor was her latest sex partner; that's all. Biting at the corner of her lip, Gail kept quiet instead of replying. She wasn't going to give rise to the bait, Casey can say whatever she wants, it doesn't mean it's true. Instead, for retaliation, Gail gave a sharp tug with the hand that's currently entangled in the golden locks.

Casey dragged her teeth along Gail's soft skin, only nipping the base of her neck gently before pressing a few kisses along her jaw. Gail was clearly flustered due to how she'd reacted, her hair being pulled at as Casey continued teasing. She hummed in appreciation, looking up at Gail with a smirk that let her know this was just the beginning. "You can keep doing that" she said, moving her hands to her ass and squeezing, "just know that I like it." She was in control, as per usual. She was the one in charge, just the way she liked it. But because of that, because of what Gail had done in retaliation, she wasn't going to kiss her just yet. Instead, she continued to tease her jaw, slowly moving toward her ear and whispering to Gail that she liked it rough.

"Fuck," Gail breathed out, the tip of her ear redden from embarrassment or arousal, nobody knows. This is going to drive her insane. What is with this girl? Her heart rate is already going through the roof from just the light touches on her neck and jawline. Swallowing heavily, Gail clenched her jaw and pinched the back of Casey's neck. "Stop teasing and just...!" She growled. She didn't want to be the first to give in, but it's starting to look like Casey knew exactly what to do to make Gail give up the remaining shreds of control. While most of the people would assume that Gail loves to be in control during sex, she prefers it the other way around. She's had so much control in her life that she just wanted, no needed, someone else to take the reins in certain parts of her life - that being sex. But in this particular case, she would be damned if she doesn't fight to keep every last sliver of it, no matter how much she wants Casey. It might be a losing fight, but she'll damn well put up a good fight.

"Stop teasing and just...?" Casey repeated, questioning Gail quietly, brow quirked in the most teasing way. She was feeling more than cocky because it seemed as if Gail was slowly losing control and just wanted what Casey was so rudely keeping from her. Gail was anxious to have it, and Casey wanted to keep it from her for just a little bit longer. Her tongue darted out between her lips, slowly trailing up from the base of her throat to her jawline. "What do you want?" she asked, nipping at her skin as she dug her fingers to her side. "Do you want me to kiss you?" she whispered low, "do you want me to bite your lip and pull your hair?" Casey bit her own lip, her hands slowly moving up Gail's back. "What do you want me to do to you, Gail Weston?"

Feeling entirely too uncomfortable and uneasy, Gail shifted on Casey's lap as she felt hands running up her back. She rolled her eyes and leaned in to give Casey a peck on the lips. "You're infuriating." She said resignedly. "Yes, to all of it" It hurts Gail to admit it, to admit defeat in this battle of wits, but it might actually, physically, hurt if she doesn't. "Kiss me already." 

Casey smirked, nodding when Gail said she was infuriating - and she was, she knew she was, she was proud of it, actually. "I am" she admitted, the smirk still prominent on her features, tilting her head upward when Gail gave in to her and admitted she wanted her to kiss her. Casey hummed, pressing a kiss to Gail's jaw, then her cheek, then the corner of her lips. Still, even though Gail had admitted to wanting her and had given in, she was teasing her. "I'll kiss you now." And so she did, capturing Gail's lips with hers and forgetting about the game she'd been playing with Gail for the past few minutes or so. Her hands moved back to Gail's waist, tightening her grip on her as the kiss deepened. This was much better; why hadn't they started it off with Gail on top of her from the get-go?

Kissing Casey, really kissing Casey was an experience. It's not like there are explosions or that it was a life-altering experience, but there were definitely some fireworks lighting up behind her eyelids. Okay, so there were a lot of fireworks but whatever, nobody can judge her. With the way her body melted and relaxed into Casey's embrace, nobody would've believed it that she was high-strung and all rigid seconds before. Gail reveled in the feeling of Casey's lips on hers. They were the softest, plumpest lips she had probably ever kissed this side of college. Whimpering quietly, she opened her mouth which, almost instantaneously, Casey took advantage of.

Not that she didn't like the Gail that she saw often - hard and rough exterior, furrowed brows and a 'don't fuck with me' look on her face - but Casey could tell that she was a lot more relaxed now as she kissed her. Casey's right hand snuck its way under Gail's shirt, ghosting her fingers over the small of her back and slowly up her spine. Not too far, though. She kept her hand in a respectable spot, still ghosting over her skin, daring to move it to her ribs... but that was more than enough for her. She wasn't going to push unless Gail asked her to. Besides, she was happy to just be kissing her, to feel her lips against hers, her tongue. It didn't even matter when their teeth gently knocked against one another's. This felt good. And if Casey really thought about it, if she wasn't so distracted by Gail's lips and tiny noises of approval, she would realize that this was the first time in a while that she wasn't doing anything to make it sexual. This was the first time she was okay with just kissing someone... even though, yes, she did want to switch their positions and lay Gail down on her couch so she could be on top of her. This was fine. Really, this was more than fine.

"Fuck," Gail said quietly as she slowly pulled away from Casey, their noses centimeters away from each other, their lips barely touching. She kept her eyes closed and tried desperately to regulate her breathing and heart rate back to normal again. She's made out with a lot of people, she's had groping sessions like every other girl, but none actually made her feel this much with so little. For Christ's sake, Casey hadn't even touched her breasts yet. "I can't, I can't stay." She finally got out, voice soft and eyes hazy. She was still reeling from the whole making out with Casey thing to really throw back on her usual stoic, snark, and sarcasm façade. So instead, she sat limply on Casey's lap with her arms still circled around Casey's neck.

Casey furrowed her brows when Gail said she couldn't stay, confused at the soft words and the meaning behind them, especially since Gail wasn't making the effort to actually get up and leave. She was still there, on her lap, looking at her in a way that was unlike her usual demeanor. "You don't have to stay" Casey whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of Gail's lips then pressing another to her pulse point, "I won't make you stay." She was breathing hard, still reeling from what had transpired just a few seconds earlier... still wanting to kiss Gail. "But I want you to" she admitted, biting her lip a little nervously, "even if we don't keep kissing. We can just go back to my bed and we can lay there. We can sleep. We can cuddle. We can... it doesn't matter what we do." She cupped her cheek with one hand, smiling softly at the brunette, "stay the night. What do you say?"

Gail tried to look frustrated and her usual grumpiness but all she managed was a slight pout of her lower lip. "I can't," she said, devoid of any conviction. It also didn't help that she had made zero effort to move or to get off of Casey's lap. She just sat there and let herself be handled and kissed. "I shouldn't." She said breathlessly this time, what with Casey kissing her neck softly. Gail doesn't push her away, but rather stretched her neck as Casey's mouth traveled upwards. "Maybe." A peck on the corner of her slightly up-tilted lips. It shouldn't be this easy to change her mind, she really shouldn't stay. She had work early tomorrow and she has nothing here, unlike Connor's place. She would literally have to wake up at ass crack of the morning to get home and get changed. But one by one, all the reasons why Gail shouldn't remain at Casey's place were kissed away, peck by peck. Until finally, she relented. "Okay," She rolled her eyes, she couldn't help herself and dove down for another peck, just for good measure. "You don't play fair and you know it."

At first, Gail said 'I can't' and Casey took it as there being an outside reason for her needing to go... whereas when she said 'I shouldn't', it felt more as if there was an internal battle that Gail was fighting against - and losing. So Casey kept pressing soft, gentle kisses on her skin, trying to melt away whatever excuse she had on the tip of her tongue. Casey hummed, not saying anything as she continued to pepper her skin with feather light kisses, both of her hands sliding under her shirt and the tips of her fingers ghosting over her warm skin. Then she kissed her lips - still, though, just small pecks. Not enough to be turned into something hungry and needy, but enough to change Gail's mind. "I know I don't" she grinned her signature grin when Gail finally gave in - her teeth were showing and her eyes and nose were scrunched up, "but I have a feeling you like it." She pressed her lips against the tip of Gail's nose then whispered, "I'm glad you're staying."

Gail wrinkled her nose, not knowing what's the right thing to say at that. Does she say 'you're welcome'? She could, and she probably would've in any other occasion. Her presence is a gift and not many gets the privilege to bask in it. "You have to wake me up tomorrow," she crossed her arms in front of her chest, feeling rather vulnerable all of a sudden. "I have to go back to my place to get changed before work. And I'll have to shower." She continued to list out all the things she needed to do. "Maybe this isn't such a good idea after all. I don't like waking up early, and sleeping here means I have to do just that."

Pressing yet another gentle kiss to Gail's lips, Casey tried to wordlessly reassure her that everything would be okay - that she would wake her up early so she could go back to her place (Connor's place?) so she could be able to get to work on time. "You know... Connor's place isn't that far from here, just an elevator ride away. I mean... okay, what time do you usually wake up? I can wake you up ten minutes before that so your schedule is not off kilter." Casey tried to reason with Gail, kissing her softly. "Ten minutes. Five minutes." She paused, then added, "I don't know, I kinda just wanna wake up next to you for real this time. I like holding you, you know."

"Fine, but we'll have to make that ten minutes." Gail sighed. At least this wouldn't be as bad as Connor waking her up at 5 in the morning, or at least she hopes. "My place is a ten minute drive. I don't keep clothes at Connor's." She bent down and stole another kiss. She can at least admit that she likes kissing Casey, even though she might not be entirely too comfortable with sleeping with someone but not sleeping with someone. She's fine with sleeping over for random hookups but to just sleep with someone after kissing them for almost half an hour? That's just... weird. "My legs are falling asleep, so if we're going to keep talking or... you know, we're going to have to move." She placed her hands on Casey's shoulder, trying to push herself up. "Or at least I have to."

Before Casey even attempted to move, she leaned in to give Gail another kiss - deep, but not enough for it to drive her crazy, not enough for her to want to lay her down for more. "Okay" she breathed against Gail's lips once she'd finally pulled away, moving her hands to Gail's ass, squeezing before she moved them to her thighs as she scooted to the edge of the couch. "Let's go to bed, then." And with that she got up, picking Gail up as if she weighed nothing and leading them back to her bedroom like that, with Gail still wrapped around her. "You might be a little overdressed" she smirked as she lay Gail down on her bed, her eyebrow quirked in a cheeky, teasing manner, "you can borrow a t-shirt if you want."

Gail let out a high pitched squeal as she was unceremoniously picked up by Casey. She quickly wrapped her legs and arms around the blonde, trying to make sure that if she does fall, she's bringing Casey down with her. "Oh my God," Gail exhaled once she was safely deposited onto the bed. "You could've warned me!" She pushed at Casey's shoulder and smacked her a few times for good measure. Gail tried to be angry with Casey but just one look at that smiling face killed any chance of that. Rolling her eyes, she stuck her hand out for the aforementioned shirt. "Well? I'm not going to wrinkle this shirt any more than I already have."

"Where's the fun in that?" Casey asked her, the smirk still evident on her features even as Gail pushed and smacked her for doing what she'd done. "Take it off, then" she challenged after pressing one last kiss to Gail's lips, then pulled away from her completely and made her way to her dresser to grab one of the many LA Dodgers t-shirts she'd accumulated ever since moving out to the west coast. Without really thinking, she stripped out of her bottoms and the t-shirt that she'd been wearing, changing into a clean one before making her way back to Gail, Dodgers shirt in hand. "You'll look good in my shirt" she commented, wondering if she should turn around and give her some privacy as she changed, "- I mean, you'd look good in anything." She rolled her eyes, adding a playful "you gorgeous bitch" under her breath.

Sitting on the bed, Gail had the best view of the city. She licked her lips as she watched Casey changed shirts and kicking off her bottoms. Casey might've done it without thinking or awareness for her surrounding, but Gail planned to do it in a very deliberate manner. So when Casey came back, handing over the Dodgers t-shirt, which Gail only mildly snarled at because she was a die hard Mets fan, Gail gripped the bottom of her blouse and slowly pulled it over her head and off. Clad in just her black lace La Perlas, she looked Casey dead in the eye as she reached for the shirt before pulling it on. Not one to sleep with her bra on, she reached under her new shirt and unclasped the back, pulling the straps down her arms, and pulled it out from under her shirt. "Do you have a hanger I can hang these on?" She asked nonchalantly, as though she didn't just deliberately stripped in front of Casey.

There was no way in hell that Casey would turn around now, seeing that Gail was basically putting on a show for her. Biting her lip, Casey watched as she pulled off her blouse, put on the t-shirt she'd been given, then took off her bra and pulled it out from under the shirt. It was done so effortlessly that Casey was left dumbfounded until Gail finally spoke, making Casey nod, dumbfounded at what she'd just witnessed. Like she'd thought before, Gail was offensively attractive. "Yeah... yeah. Yeah. I got it. Yup." She sounded like an idiot and she knew it, but she didn't much care as she grabbed her garments and hung them in her closet. Finally, she made her way back to her bed and laid next to Gail, shaking her head. "You're a tease" she stated, though it was clear it was mere banter, "I like it." She kissed Gail's lips, amused at what she was about to ask. "Are you gonna let me cuddle you and hold you through the night?"

Gail made herself comfortable in the bed, lying on her back and staring at the ceiling. It's weird, sharing a bed with someone who's not her friend and not her sexual partner of the night. When she felt the bed dip next to her, she turned her head and was greeted with a kiss. It's nice, kissing Casey. She wants more of that, for sure. "No" she replied simply, but like before she did nothing that might suggest that contact from Casey is unwelcome. Instead, she turned and lied on her side, facing Casey. If anything that was an encouraging sign that Casey should wrap her arms around Gail and hold her.

When Gail turned so her body was facing hers, Casey couldn't help but tilt her head and smile at her sweetly. Though she'd said no, her actions told a different story. Before she could wrap her arms around her and hold her, though, Casey chose to press her forehead against Gail's, kissing the tip of her nose in a feather-light touch. "I'm glad you stayed" she whispered, leaning down slightly and brushing her lips against hers before finally wrapping her arms around her. This was good. This was more than good. Casey hoped there would be more of this in the future but even if there wasn't, this was... this was enough.

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Fully Editable Funny Videos: Videos are one of the highest consumed forms of content. So why not create memes from them to boost engagement? Thankfully, with this option now included in MemeBuddy... you can do so easily and quickly. Just scroll through our funny video library, click to edit, and create your meme in a flash!

Weíll Host Your Data For 60 Days At No Additional Cost To You! Listen, we want you to get up and running quickly and getting results with MemeBuddy right out the gate. Thatís why weíre going to include 60 days of hosting all the memes you create on our own server. You wonít have to worry about a single thing.  Every campaign you put together will be stored securely and ready for use when you need it up to 2 months.

DFY Ready To Go Templates You Can Edit Quickly: Success loves speed. Meme marketing is no different. So when you get ready to make your memes, weíve got you covered. We provide DFY ready made templates that lets you create fantastic eye-catching memes from the start. Just a few clicks, some quick editing, and youíre all set.

Trending Hash-Tag Retrieval: Hashtags are some of the best ways to get involved in conversations and get extra organic traffic. Inside of MemeBuddy, youíll also find hashtags that are a great fit for your niche.  Or if you want, you can build memes around existing hashtags that are receiving a lot of views in real time. This list includes over 1000+ hashtags at any given time and is updated consistently for the best research & results.

High Traffic Hashtag Insight X-ray: In addition to giving you the latest hashtags, weíre also going to give you the ability to get suggestions for hashtags with all the necessary data included. This gives you insight into data such as likes, total traffic volume, retweets, and more. Now you wonít waste any time going after hashtags and keywords that donít matter. With the Hashtag Insight X-ray, youíll know exactly where to focus your meme marketing efforts for the best possible results.

Get Up to 30 Animated Emojis: Memes are already a great way of capturing attention, but with this option you will make your memes stand out from the rest. Add one of the animated emoji from the included library and get ready to make any meme you create pop!

Edit Videos With Just 1 Click: You can also take snippets from ANY video and use those in your meme marketing as well. Simply upload the video from your computer, click and add your elements, and youíre done! Perfect for creating the best memes or animated gifts. You can also take snippets from ANY video and use those in your meme marketing as well. Simply upload the video from your computer, click and add your elements, and youíre done! Perfect for creating the best memes or animated gifts.

Convert ANY Meme into a Fully Animated GIF: If you want to put a new spin on existing memes or just come up with a different variation of memes... this is EXACTLY what you need. By having access to this option, youíll be able to breathe new life into any meme you want. Plus you can add even more ëspiceí to it by using one of the animated emojis included with MemeBuddy.

>>> https://jvproducts.club/meme-buddy-oto/ <<<

Benefits:

Gets You Organic Traffic Easily: Because memes are a natural part of internet activity, these items get shared and passed around the internet over and over again.  Sometimes with millions of views. You can use this strategy for yourself with the right hashtags and let the traffic roll in.

Takes Your Paid Traffic To A New Level: By getting paid exposure to your memes, you can build your brand, email list, and business up faster than ever. This helps in creating engagement in various places online.  When people engage and trust you, credibility follows.  And when you have credibility, itís only a matter of time before you start making sales.

Capture Attention, Get Clicks, Make Sales: Itís been said that attention is the new currency online.  Itís scarce and EXTREMELY VALUABLE.  Thatís why so many companies are using memes now.  To make sure they get in front of their target audience. Use MemeBuddy to help you create incredible memes for you or your clients and capture attention and trust.  With trust, comes sales and more sales.

100% Cloud Based. No Messy - Downloads or Software Installs: Weíve taken all the obstacles out of the way and made sure you can get started quickly with MemeBuddy.  That also means there is no complicated software for you to install. Doesnít matter if youíre on a Mac, PC, or your mobile device.  Log in to your account, create your memes and get done quickly!

Works Fast: There really arenít many other marketing methods that can bring results quickly like memes can. And when you take the power thatís included in MemeBuddy, you can start pumping out traffic getting memes like a meme factory on steroids. Share those memes, redirect them to your offers...and you could start seeing traffic in hours...maybe even minutes!

Great For Beginners and Advanced Marketers Alike: Youíll love the fact that MemeBuddy has practically zero learning curve.  This makes it a great option for non-savvy tech people.  But because of all its powerful features, itís also perfect for the advanced marketer too. Both parties will benefit from MemeBuddy for years to come.

Receive A Major Discount...For A Limited Time: While we do profit from the sales of MemeBuddy, we donít want it to break the bank for you.  Thatís why weíre going to give you a special one time discount when you sign up today. This way you can start getting traffic and making sales or start your own meme creation agency without any huge hurdles.

>>> https://jvproducts.club/meme-buddy-oto/ <<<

[superdavidplank-blog]

Animate360 Review – Think Again!

Welcome to my Animate360 review. Animate360 is a brand new Product by UGOO CARSON ET AL. As usual, many affiliate marketers are promoting this Animate360 to their email list. Maybe you are one of them who saw their promotions and came here to read an honest Animate360 review. 

You want to know if Animate360 works or not! Right? So welcome to my honest Animate360 review based on real user’s results and opinions. Comment below your experience and results using this Animate360 below. It will help our readers to take decisions. 

Animate360Review – My Personal thoughts

After seeing their sales page and lots of promotional emails you can expect or dream a lot of things from Animate360. This is natural. People fall for promises. 

Let me explain, suppose a product or course named X can be workable for one and can be not working for another person.

Before buying any product you must need to know that if it will fit you or not.

And as usual, these types of products and courses like Animate360 give a lot of reason and promises why you should purchase this. 

But we always try to advise our readers to do more thinking and do some research before falling for something which may not work for you.

You obviously should have noticed that every week more than 7-10 products/software are launched and everyone promises you a lot! Products are launching one after one!

So, will you buy every product or you should stick with one PROVEN method and a much solid product like my #1 recommendation?

What you should? Obviously you should focus on ONE thing and should not be distracted. Distracting from one method to another will just make you an unsuccessful circle. So, you just need to come out from that circle and need to follow one solid, proven online business formula like my no#1 recommendation for not only make income online but also build a long-time successful online business career.

Animate360 Review – Overview

Сrеаtоr:                         Ugoo Carson

Рrоԁuсt:                         Animate360

Lаunсһ Dаtе:                2019 – Nov – 24

Lаunсһ Тіmе:                 10:00 ЕSТ

Оffісіаl ѕіtе:                     https://animate360

Frоnt-Еnԁ Рrісе:             $27

Воnuѕеѕ:                        ҮЕЅ, НUGЕ ВОNUЅ

Rеfunԁ:                          ҮЕЅ, 30 Dау Money – Back Guаrаntее

Nісһе:                            Social Media and Video

Ѕuрроrt:                        Еffесtіvе Rеѕроnѕе

What Is Animate360?

Animate360 is an across the board high media programming that encourages you to create splendid recordings and enlivened designs.

At the end of the day, it proves to be useful regarding building realistic battles and promoting recordings. Therefore, you will have a chance to expand your social nearness, connect with your customers, eventually increment your changes and find new endorsers.

Concerning comfort, Animate360 is completely perfect with other video creation programming just as PCs. Likewise, it works flawlessly with a great deal of illustrations configuration devices, for example, Youzign, DesignOPro2, Pixamatic, etc.

In addition, Animate360 has been tried a few times, so you can have confidence that it will achieve great encounters for its clients.

About the Author:

I accept that you are not new to the name Ugoo Carson, so allows simply keep this part short. Ugoo Carson has been outstanding as a specialist in making programming for a long time. As for his accomplishment, he is renowned for making a gigantic online accessible library that comprises of a large number of novel stock recordings, stock photographs, animation video resources, animation symbols, and pictures. Practically the entireties of his items are viewed as reasonable for individuals who like to make dazzling recordings to work together on the web.

Features of Animate360:

1. Cloud-based All-in-one innovative Media Dashboard with more than 5 Million Assets.

2. Consistently developing library with more refreshed substance consistently.

3. Snatch Images, Videos, PNGs, GIFs and considerably more in practically any specialty!

4. Get mixed media components in excess of 10 sorts of organizations!

5. Get Omni-Compatible Assets to use with the most utilized Video Editing Softwares on the planet like Explaindio, and so on.

6. Remove your Multimedia-Stock buying spending plan.

7. Gain admittance to the Professionally Made and Tested components.

8. Get Multimedia resources that are made to change over and utilized by the specialists.

9. Complete Multimedia Database with Keyword-Search alternative.

How Animate360 works:

With Animate360, you can set up a never-seen-before video in no time by following these 4 simple steps:

Step 1: Searching for the Video Clips, Characters or images you want to use

Step 2: Editing video clips or images downloaded if needed

Step 3: Downloading the creative assets

Step 4: Uploading your videos to any video creation APP.

What you need not be to use Animate360:

No Separate Software required.

No Technical Knowledge Required.

No Video Creation Knowledge or Experience.

No Domain.

No Marketing Experience Required.

No Need to be before Camera.

No Website.

No Hosting or anything that you esteem entangled.

What you will create by using Animate360:

Testimonial Videos

Sales Videos

Explainer Videos

Seasonal Promo Videos

Vlogging Videos

Elevator Pitch Videos

Eye Balls Grabbing Memes

Stinger Videos

Brand Promotional Videos

 Lead Generation Videos

 Review Videos

 Facebook Ads

 Real Estate Videos

 Video Intros

 Video Outros

 Call To Action Videos

 Tutorial Videos

In which Software Animate360 can be used:

Video Robot

Explaindio

VideoReel

PlayPix

Create

Clipsreel

live reel

scriptreel

socifeed

 storyreel

 syvid

 Thumbnail

 VidCuratorFX

 Doodly

 Invanto

 VideoBuilder.io

 Flickstr

 TechSmitCamtasia

 PowerPoint

 Animaytor

 Youzine

 Sqribble

 DESIGNOPRO2

 DESIGNA

Price and Bonuses:

At the point when you make the wise decision to get your hands on animate360 today, you’ll pay just a one-time investment of only $47

OTO 1: Animate360 PRO ($47-$67)

1. 1.5 Million+ Animated Scenes

2. 200k+ HD Stock videos

3. 200k Illustrations

4. 100k Scalable Vectors

5. 200k Video Icons

6. 10k 3D Video Elements

7. Access to Members Only Training on How To Land High Ticket Video Clients (Over 4 hours of training)

OTO 2: Animate360 CLUB ($27/mo – recurring)

Monthly New Additions every month of the following:

1. 200 Animated Video Elements (GIF)

2. 200 Statics Video Elements (PNG)

3. 200 Animated Video Elements (MOV)

4. 500 Emojis

5. 500 Video Stickers

6. 50 PPT Video Templates

7. 3000+ Premium SVGs

8. 500+ Audio Tracks

9. 10k+ Stock Images

10. 500+ Stock Videos

11. 5000+ Scalable Vectors

12. 2000+ Vector Illustrations

OTO 3: Animate360 Reseller ($97-$197)

1. Resell Animate360

2. 100% Commission across Funnel

3. 500 Licensees

4. Unlimited Licensees

So, should you buy Animate360?

First, it depends on you. You need to think about whether you should invest your money and time on Animate360or not. 

But keep in mind that you can also lose your money if it won’t work for! It doesn’t matter what type of promising they claimed you. 

If it’s your type then there’s a chance it may work but if not you will just lose. So think twice if this fits for you before purchase.

I am not discouraging you to buy this but just try to warn you. Many people fall for promises and lose their money by buying products after products. So, you just need to be determined!

In the end, this Animate360 Review post offers users leave their honest reviews after testing and experiencing this product.

Anyone can give their positive testimonials or scam report if it is! Feel free to comment below if you have tested this product and if any results. Also if it not works, you are welcomed to let us know below on this post. 

Our readers will be benefited from your honest real user review. And we will know the real performance of this product.

Conclusion:

So, before I finish the Animate360review, I want you to know that to build a real online business, you need the best and working online marketing methods and funnels created by the best person in the industry.

Instead of buying products after products blindly and getting into something you don’t know about, see my no#1 recommendation and see exactly how to make $200 – $300 per day as a complete newbie without having any website, list or any complicated process. Work on something that is working now and changing many people’s lives every day with LIVE proofs and testimonials. 

When you join my no#1 recommendation, YOU will GET The Secret To Getting Free Traffic For Life For YOUR Business In 30-Days Or Less! – FOR FREE

You’re also going to discover:

* The #1 Non-Techy Way to Rake In Free Leads For Life

* How to Get People Coming To YOU Already Interested In What You Have To Offer

* How to Dominate The Search Engines (Even If You Don’t Have A Blog & Hate SEO)

* How to Get Started Even If You’re Brand New

* And much, MUCH More!

CLICK HERE TO JOIN Now!

So, thanks for reading my honest Animate360review and don’t forget to comment below your thoughts.

https://imsaikat.com/animate360-review/ https://medium.com/@bikromprasad03/animate360-review-think-again-b930d6974050 https://medium.com/@davidplank433/animate360-review-think-again-bd2b17b5c60a https://trello.com/c/7I5JkHbV/31-animate360-review-think-again

[346644bathspa]

Communication in the context of Digital Citizenship

‘One of the significant changes within the digital revolution is a person’s ability to communicate with other people’ (Ribble, 2017). In the Western World, communication has been made far easier and more accessible, however, it’s not the same case for the rest of the world. In many other countries, communication through the internet is a vastly different experience, ranging from the dominant market share WhatsApp possesses in India and the role it plays in everyday life, to the use of social media alternatives such as WeChat in China and Vkontakte in Russia. There is an entirely different side to the internet that the Western World rarely experiences or hears about. There are similarities, however, such as the large influx of ‘fake news’ that most countries are having to deal with, although the effects can be much more deadly in some countries than others. The dangers that come with communication in the context of Digital Citizenship can raise questions as to whether the benefits outweigh the potential risks and negatives.

In India, the internet is accessed primarily through mobile phones, with over 200 million Indians using the messaging service WhatsApp (Safi et al. 2019), due to the app allowing people to communicate through text, audio, images and emojis. This versatility in how WhatsApp allows its users to communicate is particularly of benefit as 50% of Indians are functionally illiterate (Safi et al. 2019). In this context, communication and the use of apps that are used for it (WhatsApp, Viber, etc.) has had a positive effect, as it allows the internet in India to reach remote villages and locations where it would otherwise be unavailable.

There are a number of drawbacks to this, however, as fake news has been able to spread easily and influence a large number of people, without the news stories being verified. In 2018 there were a series of lynchings in response to the rapid spreading of a fake news story that detailed groups of strangers kidnapping children, taking them to the forest and cutting them to pieces. The local authorities quickly disregarded this, as there was no evidence supporting these stories, however, the general public was heavily influenced, with it resulting in a number of killings and lynchings. Whilst WhatsApp has made efforts to stop the spreading of ‘fake news’ through the app, it has denied the Indian Government the ability to trace the origin of users’ messages for law enforcement purposes (Dogra, 2018). This can be argued as respecting the privacy of its users, however, if people are being murdered because of users spreading ‘fake news’, it raises questions as to whether or not India’s Government should have some degree of access to Whatsapp users’ messages. WhatsApp isn’t in conflict with India’s government however, as the state authorities in Andhra Pradesh use the messaging services to broadcast warnings regarding incoming lightning storms (Safi et al. 2019), along with the WhatsApp group ‘Cardiology At Doorsteps’ that allows doctors to be put in contact with less experienced medical personnel in remote areas of the country, extending the extent to which doctors can help treat patients or those in need. Both of these examples highlight the benefits and risks of how communication in the context of Digital Citizenship can affect a country and how it has affected India. It highlights the need for regulation and an awareness of how communication can be abused and used to bring harm to others, along with those who are taking advantage of communication in the context of digital citizenship needing to be educated, which was part of the reason that the ‘fake news’ was able to spread so quickly and with ease.

Communication through the internet in Russia is also a different experience to what we experience in the Western World, but not in the same way as it is in India. In Russia, access to the internet, devices that can access the internet and an education in how to use the internet is more readily available and accessible, so the problems experienced aren’t the same. In Russia, the problem lies within the government’s desire to be able to access any user’s information, with their efforts in trying to force companies such as Facebook and Twitter to store user data in their country, threatening to ban them if they don’t (Kwong, 2017). This lack of respect for users’ privacy is a large issue, as it allows the instant communication we have due to the internet to be used for surveillance rather than simply communicating. Looking at this in the context of Digital Citizenship and communication within it, a different set of benefits and drawbacks are highlighted than when looking at India. Whilst the internet allows people to communicate faster and easier than before, it has also provided Russian authorities with reasons to arrest members of the public. There were four trials in 2017 where Vkontakte (a Russian social media website) users were arrested because they posted memes that the authorities claimed ‘insulted the sensibilities of religious Russians’ (Safi et al, 2019), whilst analysts claim that the Russian authorities were simply trying to reach their quotas and so used Vkontakte and the data accessible through it to do so. Communication in the context of digital citizenship has made it easier for the Russian government to not only have access to user’s data and what everyone is saying, but also to punish them for it. This shows that whilst communication through the internet can have a variety of benefits (such as making it easier to keep in contact with friends, making the exchange of useful data and articles faster and keeping up to date with the modern world), the way we communicate can be used against us and so can put some users at risk more so than others, especially if they hold and post about opinions that disagree with what the local authorities deem acceptable.

This problem is taken to the extreme in China, with the infamous ‘Chinese Firewall’ making it extremely easy for the government to filter out any information they don’t want their citizens reading. It doesn’t seem to bother a lot of people in China, however, as because of many sites being unreachable, such as Facebook, Chinese alternatives have been created and are used instead. Just as we have access to many applications and websites China doesn’t, they also have access to a lot of applications and websites that aren’t popular or available in the Western World. An example of this would be Wechat, which is China’s most popular messaging service, however, there are many more, such as Meituan (an application used to order food) or Alipay (a service through which you can purchase movies). China’s ‘Great Firewall’ has blocked its internet users from having complete access to data and information from the rest of the world since the 1990s and whilst China has more than enough resources to provide complete access to the internet for its users, it chooses not to in order to stop the spread of any information that conflicts with the Government’s agenda, with a number of laws having been passed that mean internet providers, users and anyone else involved is responsible and liable for what is posted and available online. Phrases such as ‘I don’t agree’, ‘lifelong’, ‘human rights’, ‘oppression’ and many more have been blocked throughout China (Safi, et al 2019). When examining the Chinese firewall and its effects in regards to communication in the context of digital citizenship, it’s clear that whilst being able to communicate instantaneously with each other has its benefits, it also has the potential to allow governments or organisations to track us and keep an eye on what we say to each other, potentially infringing on user’s rights to privacy. Whilst this is similar to the issues in Russia with communication through the internet, China puts huge amounts of effort into censoring of what users in their country can access, with thousands of low-wage workers in ‘censorship factories’ being trained to browse the web and flag anything that the Chinese government disagrees with (Yuan, 2019) . This can range from shutting down political opponents, to blocking news stories or articles that highlight any misdeeds that China has committed, past or present. The 1989 Tiananmen Square massacre in Beijing is one such particular event that China makes an effort to hide any information about from their citizens. The effects of this censorship can be seen, as when 100 students in China were asked, only 15 could identify the iconic ‘Tank Man’ picture from the 1989 Tiananmen Square massacre (Lim, 2015), an image that shows a lone man blocking a line of tanks by standing in front of them, has been made famous around the world. The fact that only 15 out of 100 students in China could recognise this photo shows how effective the Chinese firewall has become in controlling what it’s users see.

In conclusion, communication in the context of digital citizenship can be seen to have both positive and negative effects and uses. The trail we leave behind online can often be used against us, as any opinions that disagree with the authorities can be used to charge users with offences, a problem in both China and Russia. It’s not only the government that is able to abuse our ability to communicate online, however. The spreading of fake news and its ability to influence people can have dangerous and deadly consequences, such as the lynchings in response to the fake news story of foreigners killing children in India. These problems do not suggest that communication through the internet is an inherently negative activity, however, as many people benefit from it every day. With trained professionals being able to extend their reach and advice to their less experienced and educated peers, (such as the ‘Cardiology At Doorsteps’ Whatsapp group in India) and friends and family being able to keep in touch and communicate instantaneously despite any distance between them, communication in the context of digital citizenship simply appears to need proper regulation and education. With proper measures needing to be put in place to stop the spreading of sensationalist new stories, respecting user privacy and preventing unnecessary censorship and surveillance. Whilst communication through the internet can be abused, proper education on how to use the internet and how users should be cautious in regards to what they post or read online can allow users to communicate effectively and with minimal negative consequences, allowing the benefits of communicating through the internet to outweigh the negatives.

[bizmediaweb]

28 Twitter Statistics All Marketers Need to Know in 2019

Whether it’s the latest news or the latest meme, Twitter consistently punches above its weight in our cultural consciousness. And it’s an important space for brands to make an impression on potential customers. We’ve gone ahead and compiled all the Twitter statistics that you need to know to market among the microbloggers in 2019.

Bonus: Download the free strategy guide that reveals how Hootsuite grew our Twitter following to over 8 million users and learn how you can put the tactics to work for your business.

General Twitter stats

1. 500 million tweets are sent each day

That’s 5,787 tweets every second.

Yes, this official number is impressive, but let us please note it was first announced in 2014 and hasn’t changed in the years since.

2. Twitter only became profitable in 2017

It wasn’t til Q3 2017 that Twitter posted its first profit: 91 million dollars. And according to analysts, that was based more on cost-cutting (in sales, marketing and R&D) than business growth.

However, Twitter has been consistently profitable for the last four quarters, and it posted its largest profit ever in Q3 2018. The stock market likes this bump: Twitter was #21 on Forbes’ Top 100 Digital Companies list for 2018 (beating out Facebook at #26).

3. The most popular emoji on Twitter in 2018 was the laugh-cry face

Followed by heart-eyes at #2, and cry-cry at #3.

What better way to celebrate #WorldEmojiDay than with some ????✨data✨?????

These are the most used emojis on Twitter the past year: ➖???? ➖???? ➖???? ➖❤️ ➖???? ➖???? ➖???? ➖???? ➖???? ➖????

— Twitter Data (@TwitterData) July 17, 2018

(Okay, you didn’t really need to know that. But you wanted to.)

Twitter user stats

4. 326 million people use Twitter every month

That’s nine million fewer than in mid-2018, and four million fewer than late 2017. Management blames bot purges, Europe’s new data privacy laws, and some technical issues for the decline.

5. 9% more people are using Twitter on a daily basis

While monthly users decrease, the number of daily users has been increasing consistently since 2016.

Source: Recode

This lines up with Pew Research’s finding that 46 percent of American Twitter users visit the site at least once a day.

CEO Jack Dorsey stated that Twitter is focussing on making the platform “a healthier and valuable everyday service.” If these numbers reflect Twitter’s goal to be more attractive to good users while booting bad ones, they may translate to higher-quality audiences for advertisers.

6. 80% of Twitter’s users aren’t American

259 million of those 326 are international users. Twitter supports these users with 35 offices around the world, and the platform operates in 33 languages. (34 if you count emoji.)

Additionally, Twitter actively supports uptake in the developing world via Twitter Lite, the app’s data-friendly alternative. Twitter Lite is available in more than 45 countries, and this dedication to growing new markets has translated to increased international revenue growth for Twitter.

7. 24% of US adults use Twitter

Of those adults, Twitter users tend to skew urban, educated, and higher-income.

Source: Pew Research

For more detail, check out our comprehensive breakdown of Twitter’s demographics.

8. User growth is predicted at less than 1%, in the US

Emarketer predicts that Twitter will only add 500,000 American users in 2019. Most of the new users will be adults over the age of 25.

9. Only 6% of US teens say Twitter is the most important social network

According to Statista, teens don’t prioritize Twitter over other platforms. (Yes, Snapchat still reigns supreme.)

Source: Statista

10. 80% of Twitter users are affluent millennials

That’s what Twitter says, anyway. This number lines up with what we know about the platform’s general demographics. 45 percent of American 18- to 25-year-olds say they use Twitter, for instance.

But does it line up with the fact that the most retweeted tweet of all time is a plea for free chicken nuggets?

Twitter usage stats

11. 71% of Twitter users are reading news there

And, according to the same study by Pew Research, that works out to 12 percent of all Americans. No other platform rivals Twitter for bleeding-edge news and up-to-the-second happenings.

This relevance is quite possibly the reason Twitter continues to be such a major player in the social media landscape, despite size and reach. After all, Twitter invented the hashtag, and live-tweeting. (And Vine. RIP Vine. Never forget.)

12. Twitter is the number one platform for government leaders

Twitter outdoes Facebook and Instagram among powerbrokers. According to the 2018 Twiplomacy study, 187 governments and heads of state maintain an official presence on Twitter.

And in related news that is surprising to no one, Twitter is politically polarized. But since outrage is the most viral emotion on the internet, at least marketers can count on Twitter users being engaged. Just keep the relatively volatile nature of this environment in mind as you build your Twitter marketing strategy.

13. People are 31% more likely to recall what they saw on Twitter

This, as opposed to what they recall while browsing online in general.

Apparently, Twitter maintains a special place in its users’ hearts and minds. Or is it just that pithy content is stickier? Regardless, this is a notable lift that’s worth capitalizing on.

Twitter stats for business

14. 75% of B2B businesses market on Twitter

Source: Statista

And 65 percent of B2C businesses are marketing there. That means Twitter outranks Youtube, Instagram, Pinterest, and Snapchat.

15. 85% of SMB Twitter users say providing customer service there is important

One of the top reasons businesses feel they need to be on Twitter is customer service. It’s almost de rigueur now to @ your airline about every twenty-minute flight delay.

However, smaller brands can also jump on the opportunity to turn frowns upside down.

16. Only 3% of customers will @ you when they complain

According to Edison Research, brands need to put in some legwork and broaden their Twitter customer service horizons.

Check out our full guide to social listening here. Or, if you haven’t already, demo the sentiment analysis tools from Hootsuite Insights.

Twitter advertising stats

17. Twitter posted a 50% increase in ad engagements between October 2017 and 2018

As of their Q3 2018 conference call, ad engagements on Twitter continue to rise. If Twitter’s ROI wasn’t competitive last year for your industry and audience, it may well be now.

18. Twitter also saw a 14% decline in cost per engagement over the same period

Likewise, given lowering prices, if you’re not paying for Twitter ads right now maybe it‘s time to crunch those CPC and CTR numbers again.

19. Twitter ads are 11% more effective than TV ads during live events

More effective at “stimulating mental engagement,” to be precise. (And 9 percent better at memory encoding). This is according to a NeuroInsight study that also found people spend 4 percent more time on Twitter during a live event than they would normally.

Take, for instance, the 4.8 billion Tweet impressions during Superbowl LII last year, most of which—I can only assume—was everyone looking at pictures of Nick Foles holding his baby.

More than any other platform, Twitter lives for major events. That kind of predictable surge in interest is worth experimenting with in your paid strategy.

20. 40% of users say they’ve made a purchase because of an influencer’s tweet

Twitter is an indispensible platform for many experts and thought leaders, not to mention comedians. Have you considered complementing your traditional ads with a well-placed shout-out from the right voice?

Twitter publishing stats

21. The half-life of a tweet is 24 minutes

In other words, a tweet gets half its interactions in the first half hour, and then starts a long, slow decline into the fog of time.

This is why some guides don’t have upward limits on the number of times a brand ought to tweet in a day.

22. Brands tweeted an average of 122 times a month last year

Source: Statista

What does that work out to, four tweets a day? Six per workday?

Although, we hope they aren’t only tweeting on workdays. A better idea: schedule your tweets in advance to catch your audience when they’re online and engaged.

23. The best time to tweet is 3 p.m. on weekdays

In our studies we’ve found that engagement on Twitter peaks around mid-afternoon, if you’re a B2B brand.

B2C brands might have even better results scheduling around working hours. (Think commutes and lunch hours.)

That said, check out your audience’s habits using Hootsuite Analytics if you want to fine-tune your timing.

24. Tweets with a GIF get 55% more engagement

Twitter studied 3.7 million accounts in order to reach this, the conclusion everyone already knew.

But it’s nice to know the exact percentage, right guys?

Twitter video stats

25. 93% of Twitter videos are viewed on mobile

This statistic from Twitter’s internal data is a good reminder that video content needs to be equally effective whether or not users have their sound on.

In fact, mobile optimization across the board is a good bet: short, punchy, and vertical.

26. Tweets with video attract 10x as much engagement

We’re all still smarting from Facebook’s (um, alleged) inflation of video views, but this is a pretty compelling number. If you haven’t brought your video assets to Twitter yet, now is the time.

27. Promoted tweets with video saved 50% on their cost per engagement

Since Twitter Business is the one who came up with this statistic, it feels almost like they’re announcing a discount. However, it could make for an easy ROI lift for those of you with spare video content in your back pockets.

28. In-stream video ads lift purchase intent by 6%

Twitter’s new type of video ad is pre-roll before video content from Twitter’s publisher partners. Essentially, you can position your 15 second ad before desirable, “brand-safe” content (think: sports highlights, models talking about dogs) from big publishers like Condé Nast, Fox, Reuters, et cetera.

According to Nielsen Brand Effect’s data, these ads are performing effectively for their brands and are worth considering if you’re looking for a new tool to reach your audience.

Source: Twitter

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