Me before season two: i am not a simp for Klaus Hargreeves, i swear. I will not use the drugs addicted boy as a comfort character again, i'm NOT going back on my phase just because season 2 is nearly out. Nope, i'm out of all these things. I don't need hi-
Klaus in season two: hi c:
Me: shit again
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Pickup lines . . .
Luther: Hey girl are you a monkey?
Coz I wanna feed you my banana
Klaus: Calm down monkey-boy
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Diego: Is there a phone in your back pocket?
Because that ass is calling me
Klaus: Since when are you an ass man?
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Allison: I love your trousers! Bet they’d look better on my bedroom floor
Klaus: I heard a rumour, that that line was cheesy
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Five: Did you know your body 70% water? ... I’m thirsty.
Klaus: *Chokes on water*
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Ben: Are you a ghost? You've been haunting my dreams all night. *winks awkwardly*
Klaus: You tried Benny-Boo. You tried.
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Vanya: Are you a wrecking ball? Because I want you to smash into me.
Klaus: *Singing* I CAME IN LIKE A WRECKING BALLLL
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Extra
Klaus: Hey Dave
Dave: Yeah?
Klaus: Did you know my lips are like Skittles and you’re about to taste the rainbow?
Dave: *Blushes*
Vanya: ...
Diego: ...
Literally everyone else: ...
Five: Honestly I loose brain cells in this family
Klaus: I swear you all live to insult me 🥺🏳️🌈
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