#ladies & gentlemen & nb babes I present to you: our gaslighting king 👏👏👏

[unsentmemory]

River river river??

Can we get a morsel of information about them please?

MESSAGE RECEIVED ! RIVER RIVER RIVER RIVER- say his name four times and he'll manifest in your bathroom to sing the fortnite victory royale song

River is 6'1", Filipino, enby af, and... mayhaps a liiitle bit dumb (but he's got the spirit!) 👉👈

he affectionately calls you "bunny" because you were so timid and skittish during the first few weeks of your relationship. (don't tell him you forgot! you've been dating him for over three years now! why would he lie about this? 😊)

has been playing the drums since he was eleven years old. he started learning it because his idol was from a rock band.

Riv loves to combine leisurewear with sportswear. if it looks and feels comfy, he's wearing it, no matter the occasion. will wear sweatpants to your wedding unless you tell him otherwise

his /j hobbies include birdwatching (you), fishing (near you), cross-stitching (in your wardrobe), yodelling (silently, while watching you sleep), baking (your favourite deserts), and Bigfoot hunting (down your enemies)

when he found out that you'd been in a car accident, he immediately dropped everything he was holding and rushed all the way to the hospital on a stolen bike. he was so desperate to see you that he almost bowled over some guy in a gaudy Hawaiian shirt. but he apologised afterwards, so don't worry!

when your friends arrived at the hospital they made it seem like they didn't know he existed up until now, which was strange... considering how he's supposed to be your boyfriend! were you embarrassed to talk about him? or did you not like talking to your friends at all? not to worry, because River is already ushering them all out so you can get some much needed rest.

Riv was also childhood friends with a guy named Ren! they offered to switch seats with him during the first day of middle school, which was a surprise because no-one wanted to speak to him up until now. their kindness touched him deeply, so much so that he wanted to become friends with him. in hindsight, River probably should've realised sooner that the only reason Ren wanted to swap seats was so he could sit closer to his crush 😬

I'm not sure what else to add, so feel free to ask for something more specific!