#lamplight Ren. makes me sad

[liloinkoink]

Fic ask meme: I wish you would write a fic of lamplight Ren’s thoughts when he first meets Martyn 🥺🥺 -rem

[ask meme: i wish you would write a fic where...]

The first sign that Ren’s life is about to start again is the sound of shattering metal. The second is the protest of old hinges, and the third is splintering wood.

The man who enters the room doesn’t wear a mask like the ones who put him here, which is enough for Ren to like him. He steps back to the door, breaks off a chunk of wood, and holds it into the fire. 

Ren isn’t sure where the man is planning to take him, but it doesn’t matter.  

Ren takes the lifeline with both hands and lets the man pull him free. 

They don’t go very far. The man circles the room once, quietly concentrating, though Ren isn’t sure on what. As he searches, Ren focuses on him. 

The man is exhausted. He looks like he’s been punched in both eyes, and has to switch which hand he holds the torch in several times as he circles the room because the act of holding it up seems to tire him. He seems to be looking for something. Whatever it is, not only does he not find it, but he’s so focused on searching that he nearly walks right into the statue of Ren—the last bastion of a useless god, drenched in darkness even when its patron is made of light. 

He stares at it blankly, circling around to see its face, holding Ren up to look closer. Ren reaches toward it, but the man pulls his hand away before Ren can touch the stone. 

“Are you still here?” the man asks, and Ren’s attention whips back to his face. The man stares directly into the stone face of Ren’s statue, as though he’s trying to meet Ren’s eyes. The man’s talking to him? “You’ve been stuck here a really long time, huh? When was the last time someone came down to talk to you?”

I’m here! Ren wants to say, but all that comes out is a crackling. He tries anyway, insisting I can hear you. I’m listening.

“Listen, uh. We’re in a pretty similar spot right now. I don’t know who put you down here, but there’s bad people running around your place now,” the man says, and oh, does Ren know that already. He doesn’t need someone to come down here to remind him how he’s failed to save even his city’s corpse. 

Does he want Ren to save Dogwarts? He’s come to the wrong place. The city-no-more doesn’t need a worthless god. What use is a prayer to Ren?

“They’re keeping me here,” the man says, pleading, “and I’m running out of options.” 

Oh. 

“If you can help me escape, I’ll follow you,” the man continues, “I’m not really a paladin, but I’ll see what I can do.”

A paladin’s oath is nothing to scoff at. A lifelong bond from a god to a mortal, a promise of devotion in turn for power and protection. Most paladins study under their gods’ churches for some time before making the sort of oath this man offers now.

To offer this at first meeting, before even offering his name? This is a desperation Ren knows. The last time he felt if, he gave up his form to save a city already burning. The first time he felt it… 

This is the sort of desperation that drives a mortal man to set himself alight in search of godhood. 

“Neither of us have better options, so…”

Ren is the pointless god of a dead city. 

But surely, surely, Ren can save just one man. 

Who would Ren be to turn him away?

The basin goes out, the fire inside snuffed without a sound. Martyn jerks back, startled, but he can still see, if barely.

Nice to meet you, paladin, Ren says, Let’s leave.

“Oh,” the man—his paladin—breathes. He holds the torch with both hands, and Ren can feel the way they tremble, even as he looks past Ren toward the statue above him. “I didn’t really think you could hear me.”

I told you I was listening! Ren wants to say, but he’s a bit too giddy to be properly chiding. 

“Oh, man. If I knew you could hear me, I…” his paladin trails off, “Wait. Am I watching this now? Am I supposed to build a temple or something? I’m not really a builder… If I get out of here, I’m going to be the world’s worst paladin.”

His paladin looks down at Ren, and Ren would give anything to smile at him. Only the worst for the world’s worst god.