#last week totally fucked me when it really shouldnt have. it was supposed to actually help me out but of course i got the fucked end of it

[shmingleping]

I fucking hate meth, man. It's never given me a good high and usually makes me literally insane. And it takes like shit. And it burns like a motherfuck to mainline like no matter what... a register feels like a miss and a miss feels 200x worse. I've only had I think two shots that haven't felt horrible..... out of like possibly hundreds at this point now. Who even likes coke mixed with meth anyways ? Totally ruins coke imo. I can't taste of the coke (something I love) & the every other part of injecting it that I like (the hearing thing & all that). What's the point dude? It's cheaper than just getting white, sure. But with all that I'm return? Not worth it to me. I want my coke back 😭

[atomicwedgienerd]

Boyfriend Twins No Longer

Derek was furious. Last night had been his 21st birthday and what should have been a blast had been ruined by all the jerks at that gay bar. “Boyfriend twins!” The taunt rung through his mind. Nobody had ever made fun of him and Arjun before! They didn’t even look that similar. After all, Derek might be tan but he could never be compared to Arjun. Sure they had both been wearing Abercrombie shirts and khakis in nearly the same hue, but lots of people dressed like that! And besides, Derek though their matching sneakers were cute. And yet, when they walked into that one queer bar in town, the hipsters all turned to them and immediately started laughing. The door guy asked if they were clones and the bartender asked if there was a 2-for-1 special at the Abercrombie shop. Like they were so cool just because they had piercings and tattoos! That didn’t make them unique! There were plenty of hipster “boyfriend twins” in that bar and nobody gave them any guff! Regardless, Derek couldn’t stop fixating on it. He hated being criticized by other gays after a lifetime of being mocked by straight people for being different. He glanced over at Arjun as he snoozed, admiring his butt in the matching pair of Andrew Christian briefs that they had actually bought in a 2-for-1 sale. Well damn, thought Derek, maybe we are a little similar. “Are you ok, hun?” Arjun asked, stirring from his sleep. Derek sighed and turned away. “You can’t be upset about the boyfriend twins thing, can you?” Derek harumphed and turned to his lover, unaware that the mystical forces that grant birthday wishes had decided to pay attention to Derek this year. “I just wish we weren’t so similar!” Derek said angrily. A lighting bolt cracked across the sky, scaring both of the boyfriends. “You’re being dramatic,” Arjun sighed as he got up from the bed. “Let me make you some coffee and we can do something fun for your birthday. Arjun headed out to the kitchen, his ass looking great in the jockstrap he was wearing. Wait, that wasn’t right, thought Derek. They had the same pair of underpants! “Arjun!” Derek cried. “What’s up with that jockstrap!?” “Uh duh, it’s what I always wear, bro,” Arjun yelled back from the kitchen. That didn’t seem right to Derek. He looked down at his own lap and noticed that he was now wearing a pair of plain Hanes tighty-whiteys. That definitely wasn’t right. He sat up and leaned over the edge of the bed but something else was wrong. His feet didn’t reach the floor anymore. Derek panicked and stood up. He looked in the mirror and something was off. Where they had both been a solid 5’11” before, Derek couldn’t be more than 5’8” now and he was looking leaner than usual. There was something weird going on with his hair but Derek couldn’t really discern it in the mirror. He grabbed his pair of thick black framed glasses from the end table and threw them on. His hair was paler, more red, than before and seemed to be stuck in a weird center part. This was not the haircut he had gotten a week ago. And wait a minute! Derek didn’t need glasses! He threw them off and the world turned into a total blur. Derek started to panic, breathing heavily and starting to hyperventilate. Arjun reentered the room, or at least Derek thought the blurry shape was Arjun—it seemed taller—and handed Derek a glass of skim milk. “What’s this?” Derek whined, his voice noticeably higher pitched. “Where is my coffee?” “You can’t drink coffee, bro,” Arjun laughed, his voice noticeably deeper. “You’re spastic enough as it is.” Arjun took a deep sip of his coffee. “Give me a sip of your coffee then!” Derek whined. Arjun laughed. “You need to put on your glasses dude.” Derek did as he was told and was shocked as the world came into focus. The Arjun in front of him was different. He was taller for one, at least 6’2” now, and substantially more muscular than he had been before. Whereas Arjun had always been clean shaven, he was now sporting a decent five o’clock shadow. Derek rubbed his face; it was now smooth where before he had been sporting the beginnings of a beard. And then Derek noticed Arjun wasn’t drinking coffee at all. He had a protein shake. “Something isn’t right!” Derek wheezed. Arjun rolled his eyes and handed him an inhaler. “You need to calm down bro. And use your inhaler. You know you’re not supposed to get excited. It’s time for us to get dressed and head to campus anyways.” “But it’s my birthday!” Derek complained, taking three short puffs of the inhaler. “So who cares!?” Arjun laughed. “Get out of my room and go get dressed!” Arjun’s room!? But they had shared a room for six months. Regardless, Derek felt too timid to argue and he shuffled meekly out of the room. Derek headed down the hallway and then noticed his backpack peeking out from their study. He opened the door and was shocked at what he saw. It wasn’t a study any more. It had turned into a bedroom. In the center was a twin sized bed with Pokemon sheets. The walls were decorated with anime posters and cardboard cut outs of Lord of the Rings figures. There was an entire shelf of trophies from Math League, Chess Club, the 24-Hour Coding Challenge, Klingon Karaoke. Whoever had this room was a total dork! And that’s when Derek saw it. A framed picture on the wall of a total dork with Patrick Stewart at a comic convention. The guy looked familiar even though he was wearing thick glasses and the nerdiest clothes Derek had ever seen. He looked closer and gasped. It was HIM. But this wasn’t right! This room belonged to a total dork and Derek wasn’t a geek! He barely even used his computer. And yet this room had a massive desk with multiple computers on them, running World of Warcraft! Derek looked at the picture again and shook his head. This couldn’t be right. He would never dress like this! And yet when Derek opened the closet. all the clothes matched those in the pictures. Plaid button downs, cheap pleated dress slacks, shiny leather shoes. None of it seemed right. “Hurry the fuck up and get dressed!” Arjun yelled from out in the hall. Derek had never heard him yell like that before. That wasn’t the Arjun he knew but something made Derek quiver. He did not want to make Arjun mad! He sighed and started getting dressed. He buttoned up the button down all the way to the top and felt compelled to add a too short black tie. He put on a pair of clashing brown slacks that stopped a couple of inches above his ankle and couldn’t stop himself from attaching a pair of red suspenders that yanked the waist of the pants up above his belly button. All of Derek’s socks were white crew socks now and they clashed with his black patent leather shoes but he could hear Arjun getting impatient so he threw them on in resignation. He was scared to make Arjun mad; something he had never felt before. He looked at himself in the mirror and sighed. He looked like a total dork! He had definitely shrunk too! There was no way he was over 5’2” now. “HURRY UP DWEEB!” Arjun boomed from the living room. Derek grabbed his backpack and meekly shuffled out, his confidence totally eradicated. He gasped when he saw his boyfriend. Arjun towered over him now, standing at a solid 6’6”. Where he had been slightly muscled before, he was now a total meathead, weighing in at 300 lbs of pure muscle. The five o’clock shadow he had moments before was now a beard of epic proportion that came down to mid chest and his hair was up in an unruly and super masculine bun. Arjun’s muscles were massive… unlike anything Derek had ever seen and they were on full display as Arjun was now wearing a muscle tank that said “Give Me Deadlifts or Give Me Death” on it. On his legs, he wore tight black sweats that showed off every bit of muscle in his thighs and his massive calved. His arms were now dotted with tattoos and an 8 gauge septum piercing adorned his nose while double zero gauges rested comfortably in his ears. “S-s-s-since when do you l-l-l-lift weights?” Derek said, now aware that he stuttered. “S-s-s-s-since fucking forever, braceface,” Arjun laughed. Braceface? Why would Arjun call him that? But Derek reached up and touched his mouth and knew the answer. Huge clunky orthodontics were now glued to his teeth and when he caught his reflection in the mirror, he sighed. “You sh-sh-shouldn’t talk to your own boyfriend like that,” Derek implored. This sent Arjun into a series of hearty chortles. “Boyfriend!?” he laughed. “I would never date a dweeb like you, fuckwad. The only reason we live together is that the college said I needed to get my grades up if I wanted to stay on the weightlifting team and well, you’re too much of a fucking pussy to stand up to me when I ask you to do my homework.” Derek tried to argue but found himself getting too nervous. I guess I am too much of a pussy, he thought. “You’re right, Arjun,” Derek complied. Arjun rolled his eyes. “How many times have I told you? It’s AJ, not Arjun. Only my mom calls me Arjun. Now let’s get going.” Arjun grabbed Derek by the waist of his tighty whiteys, effortlessly lifting him up in a painful wedgie and carried him out the door. As they walked to campus, Derek felt all eyes on them. People were swooning over Arjun—er—AJ and pointing and laughing at Derek the whole way. He couldn’t stand it! AJ and Derek couldn’t be more different. That’s when it hit Derek. The wish. HE HAD WISHED FOR THIS. “Th-th-this isn’t what I wanted,” Derek said meekly as they arrived on campus. “Well I didn’t want to have to spend time with the university’s least attractive virgin but here we are,” AJ said as he dumped a bunch of books in Derek’s hands. “I’m going to need all these papers written by Monday so I can stay on the team.” “B-b-b-but-“ “No buts, dork!” AJ yelled as he shoved him towards the library. Derek looked at AJ with tears in his eyes. They had been so close, so in love, and now this was their life. More muscular hunks walked up to AJ as they started heading off to the gym. Derek turned meekly and started shuffling towards the library, his spindly legs giving him an awkward gait. “Hey nerd!” AJ yelled after Derek. “You forgot your student ID!” He flung it at Derek and it hit him right in the forehead, causing a chorus of laughs from AJ’s weightlifting bros. Derek struggled to pick it up from the ground without dropping all his books and gasped at his ID. For a brief moment, it listed the correct information: “Derek Parker, English Comp” before shimmering for a moment and changing. Derek blinked his eyes and looked at it again through this thick coke-bottle glasses. “Derwin Pimpleberg, Computer Science,” he sighed. Derek—make that Derwin—had totally changed, and all because of this stupid birthday wish. He headed into the library wanting to cry. Luckily, Derwin found academic achievement easy, which was great because soon AJ was making him do not only his homework, but also all of AJ’s weightlifting bros’ homework. AJ and his boys would come around on Saturdays and get wasted before heading out leaving Derwin alone to play World of Warcraft all weekend. While AJ would bring home a different stud every night to fuck, Derwin was alone reading fantasy novels and writing World of Warcraft fanfiction. And the noise from AJ’s heavy fucking made Derwin sad. Before the change, Derek and Arjun had had plenty of sex, but Derwin—well that was a different story. He was a virgin and try as he might over the next few decades, no one ever wanted to have sex with him and he remained a virgin forever. Eventually, the now roommates graduated but AJ didn’t want to let Derwin go. Why would he? Derwin was too meek to fight with AJ and would clean up after him, make his protein shakes, and wash his dirty gym clothes for him. Besides, whereas AJ’s degree was useless, Derwin’s computer science degree was a cash cow and Derwin was making tons of money consulting. Of course, AJ had made Derwin sign over all of his bank accounts to him so AJ could focus on professional body building instead of working, meaning that Derwin still had to wear cheap dorky clothes and couldn’t really afford to go out, not that he had any friends he needed to see. A few year later, Derwin had to go to his high school reunion and AJ decided to tag along. All of Derek’s friends were shocked to see that their old buddy was now a total nerd stereotype that went by Derwin but they were all enamored with AJ and joined in on mocking, ridiculing, and beating up Derwin. As his former friends hoisted him up the flagpole so he had to just dangle there in an atomic wedgie, Derwin sighed. He had wished that he and AJ were different and well, it couldn't have come any more true. 

[theythemsam]

spn 1x02, liveblog, collected posts (all 20 of them) or as i like to call it: better graphics, angrier sam, they definitely have bit more money now and that’s nice and why is dean so cranky?:

Hmmm…. i miss camping so much. i totally have to get my friends to go on a camping trip with me again at some point, cause it’s so nice (if there’s not monsters in the forest only of course. I don’t wanna be eaten and i don’t want my friends to be eaten.)

#is it a liveblog if i just ramble? #probably not but whomst cares

awww, sam’s nightmare about bringing flowers to jessica’s grave ;( sad

#and then BAM dirty zombie hand #poor sam

why is dean such an asshole the moment Sam uses a word that’s not 101 English Vocab? Like… corporeal doesn’t seem super advanced (at least to me, a second language learner, who probably has a bit of an advantage since i read a lot) and definitely not “professor” level?

#like idk i probably wouldnt even react to my friends saying that #but its a good way to say somethings physical and its probably used in a lot of lore about supernatural creatures #like i know i first encountered it in a ghost story #also its weird that like dean shouldnt know that #because like i said: its ghost lore 101

you know what i love? sam actually being allowed to be angry in that episode. like jess literally just died last week, which is super traumatic, he feels incredibly guilty, he just wants to avenge her, of course he’s angry. its nice to see that, especially when in later seasons, he just… doesn’t…. get angry anymore… like at some point he just locks that all away, which is super unhealthy.

haley collins, a smart girl, who understands hiking: you’re hiking out in bikerboots and jeans? (both very bad choices, unless you want to die of a lot of pain every evening and probably have to give up super early into your hike, but hey, it’s your feet and legs)

dean, immediately condescending: oh sweetheart, I don’t do shorts

#like... your funeral i guess #also... he regularly uses terms of endearment in this sexist way and i hate it so much lmao #deans asshole factor #(a small aspect of it but you know its there) #he just... cant take the littlest bit of criticism and thinks hes so much better than everybody cause he's a hunter #and yeah you know more #but that doesnt give you the right to mistreat other people #also... theres other outdoor gear than shorts #just like... dont wear jeans! pls god!

also the way dean immediately attacks roy even though he’s so far from his element is such a jerk move? like dude, you wanted to go out there with them,, be nicer. and yeah, sure, he’s a “real” hunter, but what the hell is that kind of dick measuring contest supposed to prove except that dean nearly stepped in a beartrap, because he just doesn’t know the woods. it’s so annoying.

#also... what would they have done had they gone out there all alone? #neither of them are in any way shape or form outdoorsy people #like we get a bad retelling of hansel and gretel #and yeah sure i guess you can kill the wendigo #but will you find your way back out?

it’s probably the most honest i’ve ever been with a woman. like ever.”

that’s… not a positive thing to say dean

#wowsers #the barney stinson of hunters #and thats a negative endearment #i also hate the way he lies to women to get them into bed? typical con artist tricks some of them? #like i get that he cant just tell everyone the truth #but he definitely can get women to sleep with him without lying to them so outrageously #like he could just say hes a veteran or a mechanic #and not a producer that can get you a job in the industry if you fuck me :)))))

I do like how they juxtapose near complete silence with the sudden screams, it makes for a really creepy feeling #like... silence then roy screams and youre like Oh NO! then silence again and then dean screams and youre like ohhh nooo~ #and then silence again and then haleys brother screams and youre like AHHHHH!!! #running through the woods (from shia labeef)

sam! my smart boy! immediately realizing it’s a wendigo. i love it.

#he knows his lore

roy: “i was hunting these woods when your mum was still kissing you good night”

that’s a rude one, roy.

#like he specifically says it to sam which makes that whole thing even worse 

ahhh, the good old “i think he wants us to pick up where he left of, saving people, hunting things, the family business” (which actually gets even worse when you know… mary’s background asdfghj, thanks, i hate it)

#thats one out of... maybe three good things dean does this episode #but it already really establishes that incredibly black/white worldview and the way dean thinks hes above the rest of humanity #cause hes a hunter #at least in the first season thats a big one #he really doesnt like normal people #it does make him an interesting character i just wish he was less of a jerk and i think he could be a really good character

“all that anger… you can’t let it burn over the long haul. it’s gonna kill you”

asdfghjk said from now the most angry character on the show lmao

#i miss sam being angry so i really like that #he gets to really express that #and the same single minded determination of wanting revenge #as his father probably had at first #like deans right but... maybe get that boy into therapy? definitely more useful than killing #eh im thinking about this in a much too healthy way #pls somebody just put my children in therapy they need it

well, roy ain’t hunting in these woods any longer (but he may be haunting them, because i dont think they burn his body… man that would be a nice angry ghost)

#listen let me make bad puns

dean’s “we gotta torch the sucker speech” is actually also quite nice.

#sometimes... assholes have good points

that scene where the wendigo is supposed to rush through the underbush, is literally just a person in a white fullbody dress. like why choose white of all the colors? (especially since the actual wendigo is portrayed as black)

#asdfgh im so amused by this #like the way they run... you just see it for two seconds but its so distinctly /human/ that it makes me crack up everytime

asdfgh i forgot that dean leaves behind a m&m breadcrumb trail. now i did get my hansel and gretel reference, i love it.

that short pause to listen to the creaky floor, sam just looking like

and down they go

#i had to pause cause i was like: i know a kitty meme with that face #asdfgh i hate everything

mother hen sam, just spreading his wings to protect his flock, awwww

#i still love that scene #fits well with sams martyr myth i have built in my head and that i still would die for #listen... im gay im catholic im a sucker for religious imagery whereever i can imagine it

at least the graphic effects for this monsters death are better, even though the sounds are still horrible to my ears

aww yes, for the first time ever, sam gets to drive the impala, nice!

#his little happy smile is so good #awwwww love my boy

[bangzchan]

au where isak is moving out and even’s the guy who helps with that/taking his stuff to his new place and while theyre outside packing into the car, isak hears a familiar voice greet him and he freezes and turns around and its julian, his ex, holding another boy’s hand and isak screams inside but puts on a smile “hey julian. what are you doing here?” and julian looks at his boyfriend, “we’re on a house hunt. moving in together” and isak clenches his jaw bc fuck that, THEY were supposed to do that months ago before they broke up. then he looks back at isak “and you? moving out?” and isak panics and doesnt think twice about what he’s saying, “yeah actually im moving out to move in with my boyfriend” and he wishes he could take it back or just run but he stands still and julians like “boyfriend?” and isak wants to wipe that smirk off his face, “where is he then?” and then isak hears the car door close and then even is walking towards them with a smile, work finished, and isak just. “here.” and even stands next to isak and is looking between him and julian, “hm?” and isaks like “this is even, my boyfriend. im moving in with him” 

and he’s SO glad he remembered his name when he introduced himself that morning and even, without any hesitation, holds out a hand for julian to shake, “nice to meet you, uh sorry, who are you again?” and julian clenches his jaw, “julian. his ex.” and even smirks, “oh! didnt hear that much about you” and puts an arm around isaks waist and okay wow. he’s really thankful for even but also his hand holding his side feels weirdly good. and then julian’s boyfriend introduces himself too and then theyre just looking at each other until julians like, “how long have you been together” and isak and even a different length at the same time and fuck, isaks not convincing enough (and he shouldnt be, why is he trying) “we dont really care about that. we just enjoy each other” and julian hums, “we should have a double date” and even’s thumb presses deep into his skin, but isak is too quick to reply with a “yeah, totally” and he hates himself and julians boyfriend is furrowing his eyebrows but they leave with afterwards with “see you on friday then. i’ll text you the place” and then when theyre alone, even is looking at isak, “not sure i can do friday” and isak shakes his head, “no,of course, i’ll just make up an excuse. sorry for dragging you into this”.

and then on thursday morning isak gets a call and its from even, “so i got tomorrow off and..i could go to that date with you?” and isak has been pacing in his new flat for hours and he’s so thankful but tries to be chill, “i mean if its not trouble” and even laughs, “should be fun, honey!” and isak groans, “dont call me honey” and evens like “okay then, can i call you ..hm..baby?” and shit ,that sounds really good coming from his mouth. so isak nods, then realizes even cant see him so he chokes out a “that will do”.

and come friday, the four of them sit in a restaurant, silently and awkwardly waiting for their food and then isak and julian start talking about an old thing and even grabs isaks thigh under the table and isak faces him and even leans in to whisper in his ear, “if you want to get over him dont talk to him like youre still together. now act like i said something sexy” and isak is flustered and a shiver makes its way through his whole body as evens lips brush isaks earlobe and he doesnt have to act. even turns back to the other two, “sorry i couldnt resist. he looks so hot in this buttonup” and julian squints his eyes with a forced smile. 

then later when even is walking isak home (”its okay, i have time”) they are laughing about the whole date, even making fun of julians jealousity and isak is over him (or he likes to think so. he’s really not, though) and then theyre standing in front of isaks flat and evens like “is this where i kiss you?” and isaks eyes widen and even chuckles, “im just kidding” and isak wishes he wasnt. even walks away with a “thanks for tonight, baby” and laughs and isak spends the night trying to fight the grin spreading across his face

a week later then when isak has almost forgot about all this, he’s walking down the stairs and runs into julian and theyre both taken aback and isaks like “why..are you here?” and julian chuckles, making isaks heart ache, “we rented the flat on the second floor..didnt know you live here?” and isak swears in his head but smiles, “what a small world!” and then excuses himself and almost runs out the building, texting even, “hey sorry for bothering but im in trouble if you know what i mean” and even texts him back like 10 questions marks and a “did you kill someone??”and isak laughs out loud, getting looks from strangers on the street then tells him what happened. and they meet up later that day at a café and before isak could take a sip of his coffee, even talks “so you want me to continue be your fake boyfriend?” and put it that way, it sounds silly and childish but isak nods, hiding his face behind his cup. and even sits back in his chair, “do i have to live with you or?” and isaks like “you could come over only a few days a week? or something..” and even seems to think about it long then laughs, “why the hell not. im looking for a place anyway”

so he comes over a few times, but that turns into 5 days a week when julian comes over on a wednesday and friday and even’s not there both times, and then sometimes he spends the whole week (totally only because julian could knock on the door any time and isak isnt strong enough to be alone for that) but they sometimes (most of the time) forget about the reason even’s staying. they become really good friends and its surprising but in a good way and isak really likes even, and he finds himself not thinking about julian that often but when isak comes home one day to even cooking in only his sweatpants with the radio on, he realizes why he hasnt been thinking about julian that much. because he’s been thinking about even instead and he tries to shake that off and act as casual with him as he’s done before but it doesnt really work, especially when theyre having their movie night and evens head ends up in isaks lap and isak has to fight the urge to run his fingers through his hair. even doesnt seem to realize how isaks breath hitches each time he steps too close.

then one night julian and his boyfriend invite them and a few other friends over and isak ends up drinking a few shots and even has a few beers too and then theyre sitting in a circle and before isak realizes, they are in the middle of the “make out game” andwhen its their turn, evens eyes are telling him its okay ,they dont have to do it but isaks drunken mind says fuck it and he leans in and theyre kissing and isak is dizzy and doesnt want to stop and evens hands are on his neck and holy shit its the hottest kiss isak has ever had in a long time. he drinks after that and somehow forgets that happened

until next day when even brings some water and painkillers in for isak and isak cant look into his eyes and his heart feels like its gonna jump out his chest and even is sitting on his bed and then hums, “so last night was interesting” and isak downs the whole glass of water slowly, trying to gain himself some time and then he looks at even, “yeah? dont really remember anything man” and he sees evens face drop and isaks heart does the same but then evens lips quirk up in a painfully fake smile, “yeah me neither” then leaves the room with a “hope your head is okay” and isak is ??confused. bc he doesnt think even ever felt the same but this did make it look like he did but isak doesnt know what he’s supposed to do about it. so he doesnt do anything and ignores the topic, acts like nothing happened.

and then even stops coming over and doesnt answer isaks calls or texts and isak is mad at himself for fucking up whatever they had and julian asking where even is makes it harder and he’s annoyed and sad and still confused but mostly in love with even. so when on his way home he sees even putting furnitures and boxes into a car at a house, he steps up to him with a racing broken heart and when even sees him, isak feels his heart break into more pieces and he misses the smile on evens face. and he wants to talk to him but evens just “i really gotta work, we’ll talk another time?” without looking at isak and fuck, that really hurts. but isak goes home.

and after he finds out from evens best friend that even kept talking about isak and how that kiss made him sure that he loved isak, he goes over to even’s and that night even tells isak he’s bipolar and isak has an idea of what it means, though he’ll make sure to learn more about it, and he tells him its okay and his arms wrapping around evens worn out body that night makes even believe that it IS okay and when they go back to isaks flat, even is bringing more clothes than he’s brought before. and isak running into julian two weeks after that feels funny bc isak realizes if it werent for him turning up in his life this many times, he wouldnt have even waiting for him in their flat and isak just pats julians shoulder and greets him with a wide smile and almost skips while walking out to the street, going to the nearest bakery to bring some food home, for him and even

[strawberryspeachy]

So far on the boys ive talked to in japan - aside that teacher

1) around september i decided to look at whose on tinder. One boy i matched with talked to me and didn’t stop responding upon finding out i was not japanese. He helped me with a couple japanese phrases - telling me what sounded most natural. Asked me if i lived alone. Said he wanted to meet me.... asked if i was free that week. I said yes. I gave him a couple days that i was off. He never responded again - that was about 5-6~ days into talking

2) october i went to a club... after a disappointing night i talked to the cute ... not bar person but like he was on the floor. I thought he’d walk away but he got all happy and kept moving close to me to talk. It being too loud combined with my poor japanese and his no english meant we used google translate to talk mostly. Added each other on instagram and he said he’d like to hang out sometime. I asked about a few days and he pulled out his calendar and both were days he worked- he had two jobs. He said we’ll figure out a time later. We had some conversations on instagram. Then after a couple weeks his stories always showed him with friends. I asked him a couple times when he was free and he said he was working all the time. After another weekish of that i said it seemed that he had time to see his friends but not me. And he basically just said yep

3) december i got back on tinder. But for real. Not just a qick swipe through. Talked to the next guy with a bunch of other dudes. Was just talking. Trying to improve my english. Hoping someone would ask me to go eat with them since that is what id written on my profile. This boy asked me to hang out. We’d talked more and more over the two weeks and he said he really wanted to see me. But he couldnt cause he was working too much. Then he told me when he has a break. I had the flu at the same time and told him id tell him when i was better and he got sweeter and sweeter toward me. Then we talked on the phone and it was awkward and difficult cause my japanese not being great is even worse when i cant gesture. But it went well. Then. Suddenly. Over text the tinder boy - lets have sex! - bs came up. I said i didnt want to the first time we meet and i wanna just talk. He asked a couple more times about it and then agreed. The day before we talked on the phone again - he suddenly said he had to take another call and hung up and then didnt say anything else the rest of the night. I freaked out a bit that night thinking hed stopped talking to me. But the next morning he messaged me like nothing happened. Didnt even want to acknowledge my freak out aside from telling me not to think so much.

We met up. He took me to a shrine. We got fortunes and ties them to a tree... then he took me to his apartment... fast... he said he wanted to watch movies together.... bought... chocolate. I mean great but i wanted real food i was hungry. Then. He kept trying to have sex with me. So many times just pushed and pushed. Would not take no for an answer. Finally when... he was trying to take off more of my clothes and i wouldnt let him and said no again. He asked if i had my period. And only stopped after i said i did. Kept trying to pursuade me to give him a blowjob.

Before that... he asked me to be his girlfriend. Said he was moving soon and asked me to move in with him. Told me hed be workig two jobs for the rest of january so we couldnt meet again till February...

Anyhow after i kept saying no to a blow job and other stuff happened i asked him if we could go get food. He said he didnt have money and cooked bad ramen on the stove and french fries... he drank a bunch of alcoholic. We watched some music videos and he went to sleep.

When he kinda seemed to wake up i tried to make a point of me leaving. He just acted kinda annoyed that he had to even still deal with me being there at that point and ignored me while trying to sleep... he ghosted me right in front of me

He replied to my text the next day with some nonsense and about a week later he told me about his apartment plans. He sent one last text about it before... never responding again

I let it be for the next four weeks... till the days he was supposededly done working two jobs and couls see me again. Hed made story postings during this time

But yea. Never replied to me again

4) some boy who wanted to get better at english cause hes moving to the us. We talked on the phone a couple times near christmas. He complained about not having a gf and said he wanted to hang out. But the times i asked he was “busy”. We hung out once... played darts. He said he didnt want to drink cause he drank the night before and he ate before meeting me so left early.... said next time. There was never a next time.

5) some guy i talked to a bit. He asked to meet up. I agreed. Took a whole for us to find each other cause he kept...... hanging up the phone on me.... he didnt look like his pic and he dressed weird. He basically hailed me over when he found me and then walked fast so that i basically had to chase him around. He was one of those dudes that walks with his hands out like people are supposed to move for him. After about 20 minutes of that he told me to wait while he pretended to get a call and then told me his dog is sick and he needed to leave to take her to the hospital. He said well meet again. Never saw him again not that i wanted too.

6) talked to another boy for a couple weeks. Just about fun stuff it was good conversation. We talked about music and movies and murder mystery parties. About our days and just generally the kind of good conversation you have with friends. Around the third week we talked about meeting... but. Then. Tinderboy - i wanna have sex! Came into the convo... i told him i had my period and asked if we could go out to drink instead. He said lets drink before we do next week. Whatever. Next week comes around. Same good conversation everyday. The day of comes and he responded to me in the morning reconfirming the time and place and stuff. Once the time to meet rolled around. No response. I called him a couple times more so to bitch him out. He blocked me.

7) some other dude. We talked a bit. He asked me to go out to eat. Post poned 3 times that night cause he was working later than he was supposed to. I was so hungry. No he didn’t wanna go out to eat. Bought me some convience store food and barely let me finish eating before hooking up... he said thanks to my happy birthday message. But otherwise we havent talked again. Even though hes a ten minute walk away.

8) then of course theres the absolutely adorable boy who took me out on the date of my dreams.... until he silently walked me the train station. Said bye. And now has slowly ghosted me all week. He just unmatched me on tinder after i asked about it so. Guess he’s gone. Which has me feeling fucking terrible.

9) talked to a guy a couple days ago. He asked if i wanted to hook up. I basically agreed. I WANTED HUMAN CONTACT ON VALENTINES DAY. He told me beforehand he was only free for a couple hours. Asked if i wanted him to pick me up the night before buttttt i got my hair treated and shouldnt sweat so i said it was too late and i needed to sleep. He met me. Late. At the station and walked me back yo his apartment after i was done work. One of my students saw me with him... embarrassing. We talked a lot. Hes the oldest guy ive ever... anything. Though still just 29. It would have been a good conversation if... i didnt know he asked me to come have sex and then never made a move. An hour and a half in he suddenly went

Oh its the time! Sorry go. I should have agreed to his request for yesteday instead of insisting on friday.

Ive been freaking out about 8 and i messaged him asking if he lost interest in me. He never responded to my message asking if he wanted to hookup yesterday. He didnt respond for 20 minutes and then i said either say yes or no so im not waiting. And he almost immediately responded with no. So. Idk.

10) talked to some dude from hong kong yesteday. He messaged me first saying he doesnt like japan and just came for the food. Ive been crying all day and basically hust bitched about japan to him. Apparently he doesnt actually dislike japan... he just doesnt like the bidets.... and i told him my home life sucks so im here but here sucks too so wtf. Ya know. Things that are totally attractive go someone you started talking to a half an hour ago. He said he wanted to talk about food. Im good at food talk ok. Then asked if i wantrd to meet up and look for cake with him. Sure. Shinjuku. The same placd i met 5 and 3. Thought id break the- everytime i come to this city im depressed. Cause before them the last time i went to shinjuku in the summer. I couldnt find the clothes shops i was looking for. There were couples all around me. And it was the first day in japan i felt so utterly and truely miserable and alone and like nothing in my life was better. I was still hoping at that point that the teacher i worked with would go with me and show me around and i left thinking next time i go itll be better cause i wont be alone.

Well shinjuku appears to be bad luck for me. I got stressed trying to find this boy and sounded like it over the phone. But he still met up with me. I brought him some snacks from the baskery near me on my way. We talked. He speaks english. But he just asked about my job... how do you get it. Is it hard. Whats its pay.

I walked past a cake shop on my way to meet him and i showed him the cakes he said he really wanted. He said he didnt bring much cash so he didnt want it.... k i thought that was the point of this trip but whatever. He asked me if i was hungry three times. I said i ate before coming because normally when i meet people we dont eat and i go hunry. I left out the YOU SAID YOU WANTED CAKE!!! Part. He said he was hungry but didnt want me to not eat while he did. So i told him to find a place with desert and ill eat desert while he eats a meal. Were walking. This is about 25 minutes in and he starts to complain his legs hurt and that hes tired. Another 10 minutes pass and he complains more about how he feels like hes floating and his shoes dont fit. I see mcdonals and say i know this is lame but ive kinda been craving a big mac. Its fine if not cause ya know your visiting japan but would you want mcdonals. He jokes about it and then goes yea i could go for a bigmac. We get in the store and he tells me to go. And i tell him to go ahead first. Then he says no he feels sick and doesnt want to eat.... tells me to eat... the exact situation he didnt want earlier

Hm. Gee. I wonder whats coming. I say i only wanted to eat cause he said he was hungry. We leave and then he says maybe its tmi but - proceeds to tell me about being constipated. I didnt try to listen. Btw he was 6’4 and kinda difficult to hear if i didnt try. I wrap that up with. Yea i think that was a tmi story but good for you. Cause the gist of it was that he could shit now.

Then. You know its coming. He says hes gonna go home. I stop acting happy. I told myself the next time this happened id confront them.

We met up at 7 and it was now like 7:50. My train is 10 bucks round trip.

But. I couldn’t think of anything to say.

All i could say after a while of kinda just going silent was - whyd you ask me to meet if you were so tired.

And he aaid cauae walking around japan alone isnt fun. Yeah mean i know. I said that to you over text earlier.

I asked him if i dont look like my pic. He says i look exactly like my pic.

I say a few times before ive met up with guys and we never talk again. And he goes - well youre meeting strangers and sometimes it just doesnt click

He unmatchd me the moment he got on his train. I imagine were still friends on snapchat cause he probably deleted it since he redownloaded it to talk to me

So yea. Same experiences as back home because im me and i will always be cursed and miserable. I dont wanna sleep cause im waiting to see when that boy in 8 will block me on line... cause i sent alot of messages. It doesnt help me to know when.... but.... ya... idk. Someone shoot me please

[viralhottopics]

27 Doctors And Nurses Describe The Exact Moment They Realized Their Patient Was An Idiot

1. Put collard greens into her vagina

I had a patient that got a pretty nasty infection and became septic after putting collard greens in her vagina for several days because she thought it would induce an abortion.

2. Thought she had menopause

Not a Doctor, but EMT.

Had a woman who was in active labor, despite insisting she couldn’t be pregnant. She said her last period was “like ten months ago” so she’d gone through menopause.

She was 25.

3. I don’t have diabetes…

“I don’t have diabetes, I take medicine for that.” – happens so often I cant put a face to that quote.

4. The oatmeal lady

A woman comes in after having a baby and tells us she’s having trouble breastfeeding. I book her an appointment at a breastfeeding clinic, give her some resources, etc. Her appointment was fine and she went on her merry way. A few weeks later, we get the fax that she went to the breastfeeding clinic and everything was fine. Awesome.

A year later she shows up for her doctor’s appointment, and she’s obese. She must have put 100lbs on an already obese frame. She’s developed many health problems related to her weight (that she refuses to acknowledge are due to her weight. Of course.) She tells us she’s never been more active after having a kid, her diet hasn’t changed, her work life hasn’t changed, nothing has changed, the weight gain just happened due to ~hormones. We ask if she’s breastfeeding, she says yes. We ask how she’s getting the extra calories for the breastfeeding, and she tells us the Clinic told her to eat 1-2 bowls of plain oatmeal a day. It worked, so she’s still doing it.

We figure this is how she gained so much weight (she’s probably eating 2 large bowls of oatmeal on top of her meals, with milk, sugar, butter, etc), but the woman she’s eating 1-2 packets of plain oatmeal a day. Nothing on it, nothing added to it. It says plain on the package, it tastes plain, it’s plain.

We send the doctor in to see her after briefing him on the whole story about the oatmeal. He’s in the room with her a time — much longer than normal. When she comes out of the room, she keeps her head down and walks off, looking angry and embarrassed. The doctor walks up to the nursing table and fills out the chart.

“You never asked what of oatmeal she’s eating”.

Yeah. Turns out she didn’t know plain rolled oats were a thing. She thought the breastfeeding clinic meant plain oatmeal . She was eating an entire of Dad’s oatmeal cookies every single day for a year (basically a ‘bowl or two’ filled with cookies), and could not understand how that was different from oatmeal.

5. She was expecting to lose weight on this diet?

Had a patient who was coming back post lap band for a check up. What we usually do is revise the patient’s weight, etc and ‘tighten’ the band or ‘loosen’ it as needed.

Now the thing to remember is that getting lap band isn’t as easy as just throwing down some money. For six months, the patient must meet with a psychiatrist and a dietitian to understand what they’re getting into and if they can adjust their lifestyles and commit. A goal weight loss target (ex: lose ten pounds) is usually set for the end of the six months to ensure the patient is serious. So after all of this rigorous evaluation, a patient is deemed fit for an operation.

Enter my patient ‘Sylvia’. I checked her chart, BMI before surgery was 40, she was morbidly obese, and now had come in for her first follow up to ascertain if she’d lost any weight. Well, I put her on the scale, calculate, and what do I see? Her BMI was now 45. Perplexed, I asked her to explain her diet to me.

Sylvia- Well I’ve been doing a liquid diet just like you all said

Me- Very good! Can you maybe what you have?

Sylvia- I make smoothies and have them whenever I feel hungry.

Me- So what do you put in your smoothies?

Sylvia- Cake and ice cream.

Me- …..

Yup. She was serious. Somehow it didn’t occur to her that this wouldn’t be healthy. We reversed her band.

6. What was she feeding her baby?

A woman came in for a baby check with her 6-month-old and she had what looked like chocolate milk in the babys bottle. So he started explaining to her as kindly as he could that she shouldnt be giving her baby chocolate milk. At which point she interrupts him and says, “Oh that isnt chocolate milk. Its coffee! He just loves it!

7. Actually, she wasn’t dying at all

An older lady was brought into the ER barely conscious by her husband. In a very thick Italian accent she told the doctor she was dying. She had complained of feeling tingly and having a dry mouth prior to passing out.

The doctor sat the husband down and they did a history. No serious medical problems and she was very fit. In fact she spent the morning cleaning her sons bar, as she often did on a Sunday morning.

Considering her age they took these symptoms very seriously and begun running tests to find the source of her ailments.

The son came in to visit his mother, and on the way he bypassed his bar. He noticed that his mother had helped herself to some of the ‘treats’ prepared the night before.

The son, the apple of his parents eye, had to then explain to his father and the doctor that the treats she had enjoyed were space cakes. And apparently she really enjoyed them as she ate quite a few.

They then had to sit down and tell this elderly lady that she was not dying, and that she was in fact stoned!

Fortunately she was still high enough to see the humour.

8. Her son had a “skull fracture”

A secretary buzzes back to me that there’s a call on line two that needs medical advice. I pick it up and one of our patient’s mother is on the phone having a panic attack. She is hyperventilating into the phone. I asked her if she was alright, thinking maybe she needed an ambulance, and through her breaths and now tears, she starts telling me that she thinks her four year old son has a skull fracture.

I ask if he fell. No.

I ask if he’s conscious. Yes.

I ask if he’s breathing. Yes.

I ask if he is bleeding from his ears, eyes, nose, mouth, scalp. No.

I ask if there is any visible wound. No.

I ask why she thinks he fractured his skull. Because underneath his eyes is red and puffy and Google says that’s a skull fracture.

I tell her to go to the ER for proper assessment (we don’t do MRIs, X-rays, CT Scans). She doesn’t want to. She says she was supposed to take her kids to the beach. Mind you, she is still crying and breathing heavy at this point. I tell her to come right over then but warned her we would probably have to send her to the ER.

She shows up 15 minutes later, cradling the child and crying. The little boy was crying too and screaming “I don’t want to die Mommy!” She kept hushing him and saying “Mommy loves her strong boy, no matter what!” Which only made him cry harder.

I pull her back into the room and she just dissolves as she tells me how she looked at him in horror this morning and saw the guarantee signs of a skull fracture. She swears he must have hit his head yesterday at swim practice.

The little boy is crying hard but I can see the noticeable swelling and pinkness under the eyes that she was referring too. I went to get another doctor and told her what I thought. She went in, came out about ten minutes later shaking her head. She had the same diagnosis.

You know when you wipe your eyes after swimming, you usually wipe under your eye too? The kid must have wiped off his sunscreen around his eyes the day before. All the pinkness and puffiness was from a mild sunburn under his eyes.

9. People who go to the vet are stupid too

I don’t have to deal with people patients, but I helped out a vet for a while and there’s a lot of dumb pet owners. Had one lady who was really concerned about her obese lab getting hiccups. The vet let her know the dog was overweight and she told him he was wrong and then insisted we do diagnostic tests to “figure out” the hiccups.

10. He totally does this to himself

I don’t like speaking ill of my patients mainly because I think we all neglect our health to a certain extent volitionally, and that can be viewed as “dumb”.

But the winner is Aristotle*. Aristotle is a 35 year old highly functional corporate lawyer. Aristotle has G6PD deficiency and (in his case) he develops mild hemolysis when exposed to certain foods, including fava beans. Every year for his birthday, Aristotle goes to the fancy Greek restaurant and gets gigandes plaki, his favourite dish. Every year he develops mild hemolysis with mild jaundice and dark urine. Every year he comes to see me, his gastroenterologist, urgently and without an appointment on the day after his birthday — bull-in-china-shopping my clinic, yelling at the secretary and other patients if he could be seen first. Every year he repeats his highly anxious concerns that his liver is screwed up because he’s mildly jaundiced and has dark urine. Every year I tell him it’s from the gigandes plaki. Every year he resolves never to eat it again and is fine for the rest of the year on his G6PD diet.

And every year on his birthday, he forgets. And then the cycle continues.

11. Cure us with ur mind plz

A lot of patients come to the hospital because they are “sick” but refuse to do any tests or take any medicine. Do people expect healthcare workers to do a ritual dance and chant around them and magically heal their illnesses?

12. But seriously

Patient: “Well do I really NEED the chest x-ray and EKG?”

Me: “Well you came here for a cough and chest pain soooo…”

P: “Yes but do I NEED them?”

Me: (thinking) WHY THE FUCK DID YOU COME HERE?!

13. She drank acidic water (but said it wasn’t acidic!)

Dentist here. In school I had a 70yr old pt who was still in the dating game and looked like that old lady who just died who played the Jeanie. (I was thinking of Joan Rivers)

She’s got a ton of acid erosion on her teeth. Tells me she drinks on “3-O” water. Didn’t know what was in it. We look it up on Google. That’d be a pH of 3. All of her water. Plus, she likes to put lemons in her water. I tell her this is also acidic. She tells me I’m wrong, because her friend who took a few nutrition classes said that as soon as the lemon juice gets into the body, it turns basic.

I told her I had a biochemistry degree… And that was wrong.

Also, her blood pressure is super high every visit. She tells me that she stopped takin her BP Meds because she thought they were unhealthy. I tell her that he method is not working at all.

A few weeks later, she strokes out and never gets out of a wheel chair again.

I’m friends w/ her on Facebook now. It’s just sad.

14. Greasy hair = diabetes???

Was translating at a medical clinic once. A father brought in his 20-year old son convinced he had early signs of diabetes since his hair was greasy. After convincing the doctor that’s what he was actually there for, we told him to go take a shower and try different shampoo its sad how little some people know about diabetes

15. Wait, which hole is it?

Nurse here.

Recently had a patients wife claim to be a retired nurse. While we were teaching her how to do an in and out catheter on her husband, she asked which hole the pee came out of and which hole the semen came out of.

16. Use the crystals instead

I’m a medical student but the number of patients I’ve seen who refuse to take medicine because they ‘don’t want chemicals’ inside them is staggering

17. Why do the good die young?

I had a woman call 911 once for a body who was supposedly murdered underneath a railroad bridge during a massive music festival. When we got there, it ended being a log with a jacket thrown over it, and a very drunk woman sobbing over said log.

18. She doesn’t want a “child’s disease”

Patient came in with a rash around her mouth; she was going on about how she had it 14 years ago and the dermatologist prescribed a certain antibiotic to cure it and diagnosed her with “perioral dermatitis.” She’s showing us pictures on Google. Okay.

Doctor diagnoses her with impetigo and prescribes her an antibiotic ointment. She leaves and fills the prescription and comes back flipping her shit. She googled impetigo and, with the help of WebMD, came to the conclusion that it was a children’s disorder on the arms and legs that can only be contracted from children and she wasn’t around children. Insists that what she believes she has (perioral dermatitis) is a “woman’s disorder” and she doesn’t have this “children’s disease”. Says that the antibiotic he prescribed isn’t on the list of treatments (thanks WebMD). (It’s on the top of the list actually, of you know, actual medical books, but whatever)

Whole time, she’s showing us these pics off google of “perioral dermatitis” saying it’s a woman’s disorder. Half the pictures were of men. Now one thing you should know, perioral dermatitis means rash around the mouth. That’s it. It doesn’t mean shit. It’s not a type of rash. It’s not only cured by a specific antibiotic. It’s just a rash that happens to be around the mouth. She was furious, shaking with rage and about to start throwing shit bc the doctor wouldn’t prescribe her this certain antibiotic. Doctor told us to call the cops if she came back. People are crazy.

19. He was stung by a bee and fine

I’m a student and my GP supervisor was involved in a scheme to reduce A&E waiting times by having a GP in A&E to take patients that weren’t actually in an accident or an emergency. As none of the patients were actually dangerously ill I was basically doing the consultations with the doctor supervising, double checking and signing prescriptions etc.

A guy in his late 20s walks in, looking very healthy, and sits down. “I was stung by a bee this morning”. “Where?” “On my cheek” “How long ago was this?” “Well it took me about half an hour to get here and then I’ve been waiting another three and a half hours” “Did it stop you swallowing or breathing?” “No.” “Are you allergic?” “No.” “What would you like us to do?” “Check I’m OK.”…

At this point I turn around to my supervisor attempting to say WTF do I do here? He says “You’re OK, go home.”

It was the most surreal consultation I’ve ever had.

20. That’s not how glasses work

Not a doctor but my dad is an opthamologist (eye doctor). He once told me that one of his patients came in utterly confused why the “medicine in his glasses no work anymore.”

21. Couldn’t feel the tiny tip of her pinkie

When I worked in a&e, had a patient with the complaint of “neurology” in minors. She tells me she cant feel the tip of her pinkie. A vague 0.2cmx0.2cm patch right at the top. No sensation there whatsoever. No other history or symptoms. I grabbed a needle, poked it and cured her.

22. What the actual fuck

I had a woman who refused to be discharged as she “couldn’t keep any food or drink down”. Her room was filled to the brink with sweets crisps and fizzy drinks.

I asked her to show me the vomit. She produced a sick bowl she had filled with spit. I pH tested this in front of her (contents of stomach are acidic). Of course pH was normal. She then stuck her fingers down her throat and physically forced herself to repeatedly gag and vomit. In front of me.

Next day I returned and said she had blood in her urine. She’d filled a sample pot with red juice. It literally smelled of fruit.

Boss discharged her that afternoon. She was back within a week I think

23. She wouldn’t turn off her zombie movies

Another patient was in the hospital to have her 9th baby and then give it up for adoption (she was 9 for 9 on adopting out babies). She was 34, had a BMI of 65, no teeth, a creepy partner (I think it was a feeding fetish type relationship) and NO pain tolerance. I was asked to do an epidural. As I’m going through the consent, she’s distracted by some zombie pseudo-documentary that she refused to turn off. She had brought the entire DVD set to watch during labor. At the end of the consent process, I asked if she had any questions.

She just wanted to know “when can I go smoke a cigarette?” I told her after the baby was out she could do whatever she wanted. The adoptive parents, who already had a few of her offspring, were there the ENTIRE time. I had to forcefully ask them to leave for the sterile epidural placement, which was remarkably easy given her size but a little more challenging given the distracting zombie show that she REFUSED to let us turn off. Baby slid out about 30 minutes later, and she was discharged before the end of the day. I think the OBs at least managed to get an IUD into her.

24. But will he still be a virgin?

I had a patient’s mom ask me if putting a catheter in her 6 year old son would break his hymen and would he still be a virgin.

Being a virgin was important to them because of religious reasons.

25. You can’t cure stupid

One was a lady wanting to know if our clinic would do a “virginity test” on her because her PCP told her they don’t do that. It took me way too long to explain it’s not a real thing.

Another lady needed to get tested for STDs, not weird, but she said she needed us to send the results to her prospective employer? Uh why?? We told her we wouldn’t do that but she could come get a copy of her results and do whatever she wanted with it. She does but comes back later the same day and says we gave her the wrong test results. We double check, nope, those are def her test results. Trying to sort this out with her, I asked her why her employers would want an STD test anyway. She says, they said it’s to make sure I don’t have “tubulars.”

Then it dawned on me. She meant Tuberculosis. She needed a TB test, not an STD test. She gets angry and yells that we’re just trying to trick her into taking more tests to charge her more and then stormed out…

26. “One more for the road”

This happened to a friend of mine when he was in training to become a paramedic. He was on a ride along, basically, and they had received a call where a woman fell down the stairs. They get to the address and knock on the door. The woman who called was inside folding clothes. Apparently she had been drinking on her medication. Twisted her ankle and called for an ambulance. So they asked her if she wanted to go to the hospital. She’s says yes, then proceeds to the fridge to pour “one more for the road.”

27. I told him to not do cocaine

Doc here. I had a guy with an ICD in place. For those who don’t know, it basically shocks your heart if it goes into a funny rhythm.

He would regularly come into the hospital to have it turned off because he would do a ton of cocaine and the thing would keep firing due to his high heart rate.

I told him not to do cocaine. He kept doing cocaine.

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