#leanne posts The Horrors (her drafts)

[fearandhatred]

ginger crowley you are so important to me ginger crowley you are so important to me ginger crowley you are so important to me ginger crowley you are so important to me ginger crowley you are so important to me ginger crowley you are so important to me ginger crowley you are so important to me

- draft from december 1st

[goldbasar]

Hey! So I finally motivated myself enough to write an info draft about Frederic ! /o\ hides

Frederic de Verlais, 28, Wildwood Elezen. Born into a wealthy family of Ishgard. 

Grew up in the Pillars with very proud and doting parents who made sure to both educate him well and prepare him for the honor and glory of knighthood.

He’s the second-born son, his older brother striving as an influental Inquisitor. He has a 7 years younger sister who he’s absolutely protective of. 

A handsome man who takes his time when it comes to his looks. He would never voice it, but he’s quite conceited due to his outward appearance. 

Frederic’s utmost drive and purpose has always been his participation in the holy crusade against the dravanians. He views himself as immensly faithful to Halone and like your common ishgardian, despises dragons with a burning passion. 

As a knight and comrade he can be both overbearingly strict and observing as well as caring and protective - He’s actually helpful when training and tries to prepare himself as well as everyone around him for the war as best as he can. 

HOWEVER... He views Elezen as more talented than Hyur. 

He *is* a bit of a snob, so he can be hard on recruits from a lower standing. Most of the time, he has his  moods and prejudices under control. certain types of characters elicit his arrogant behaviour, though... 

Frederic started training since he was a young boy, made sure to meet all criterias and entered Knighthood at 21. He designed his whole life for what he felt was the greatest honor.  After the horrors of his first field operations as a youth, he told himself to become numb towards loss, and while he learned to accept it happening, he never truly gets to turn off his emotions like a switch, as much as he tries to pretend. With war comes brutality, pain, death, decisions. regrets. As every other knight, he had to learn this quick. As long as it continues, you manage to pull through, but what if everything suddenly falls apart?  Unlike many other Ishgardians who adapted to Ser Aymeric’s point of view or even doubted the Church completely during Heavensward’s revelations, Frederic avoided digging too deep into his innermost personal feelings and instead tried to act as a driving force within the Temple Knights, preaching to remain vigilant and motivated to steel themselves against the inevitable battle against Nidhogg.  During the events of Stormblood, Frederic’s world crumbles one by one. Suddenly, he realizes that there is no enemy to fight anymore. That “protecting Ishgard, his family”, “fighting in Ishgard’s name”,  isn’t enough and never has been enough. What made Frederic fight was the enemy. it was anger. It was his whole purpose to see the enemy fall. To make peace with the Dravanians is for him, the ultimate loss of purpose and identity. His whole life long that was his aim, his call, his whole self. While he suffered and set his own life on the line multiple times, he felt ALIVE. HE ENJOYED the war, seeing their arc enemies fall. Even after the events of HW, Frederic never stops hating the Dragons. It started as religion and ended up taking over his whole personal mindset. Ishgard’s peace feels absolutely hollow to him and there’s nothing he can do about it.  Now, stationed at East End, he finally- albeit involuntarily- gives in to his own issues. Nothing to keep him occupied anymore makes place for his major PTSD problems rising up after YEARS, anger, feelings of worthlessness. Bitterness. Boredom. Disatisfaction at it’s highest level. He /still/ tries to tell himself it’s all for Ishgard, he still tries to adapt, but he feels nothing about the peace. about this new cause. It’s like he’s not living his own life. 

http://goldbasar.tumblr.com/post/171424109878/the-abrupt-loss-of-purpose-your-sense-of-dignity

this is a pretty important Frederic screenshot set to me. 

there was also a time when he, in a very bad mental state, would wander off into the Highlands to kill a dravanian brutally after the peace treaty. He’s never been caught for this crime and can barely contain his resentment for this action being treated as such now. He’s not in a good place, obviously, but quite skilled at putting up a front. 

Relationships (so far)

Emelie - Frederic’s first unoffciial girlfriend. The two of them met during his first mission when he was 21. She was the daughter of a priest, living in a little rural church in lower coerthas where his squad sought shelter after a battle with severe casualties. Distraught from what he had seen, she offered solace and comfort that night. He quickly fell for her despite their differences in standing and rare chances to see each other. Ultimately, she was promised to another man whom she married. Occassionally, Frederic would pay impromptu visits to her, trying to win her back, despite the will of the Fury.  Emelie lost her life to the Calamity.

Ann Cross ( @rheavlis ) - A strong-willed, diligent midlander woman hailing from Ishgard who aims to be accepted as a capable knight as much as everyone else and serve her homeland. She, as Ser Frederic, is a Temple Knight. The two often collide due to his sometimes subliminally judgemental treatment or her being too subliminally sarcastic towards his strictness. He finds her incompetent and too bigheaded while she thinks of him as vain and pretentous.  During HW/SB they grew closer and learned to respect each other, Ann being a constant support in his life especially when away from home while she comes to realize she can, in fact, learn a lot from him and experiences being seen as an equal eventually. Frederic may or may not also fight with the fact that he developed an attraction towards her, while Ann often thinks she’s not “qualified” enough to mean something to him as a woman.

Leanne de Verlais ( @rheavlis ) - Frederic’s younger sister. She’s extremely fond of him and views him as the “perfect man”. Back in the days the two of them were close, as he often watched over her and played with her when no one else had the time. Since he entered Knighthood, the two of them grew apart and whenever he sees her now, it becomes increasingly hard for him to sit down and spend time with her. He’s always alert and a bit of a restless character. While he himself is an extremely overprotective older brother at heart, he doesn’t realize that not staying in contact with her hurts her. He thinks that as long as he’s out there fighting and she’s in Ishgard, warm and safe, everything will be alright eventually. 

[fearandhatred]

you HURT crowley? you hurt crowley like he is nothing? oh! oh! jail for neil gaiman! jail for neil gaiman for One Thousand Years!!!!

- draft from october 12th, 2023