#like I realized I’m enby and not strictly binary man!!

[whatthehickheck]

so coming back from college this summer I would say I’m a bit more feminine in appearance and action (I’m more expressive, use ‘girly’ slang, grew my hair out, wear tighter and shorter clothes, etc) which my mom fucking loves except whereas she thinks I’m finally realizing that I’m “still” a cis girl what actually happened was I became much more comfortable in my gender and masculinity so uh yeah checkmate transphobia

[imaginepirates]

What it would be like to marry James : Enby Reader

For @groovyfluxie​, who wanted something about marrying James as a nonbinary person. I did this as a list of headcanons because my inbox is quite full at the moment, and I want to be able to get through everything. (Yes, I did bring up social standards at the time, just a warning. It gets happy, don’t worry).

James grew up in a household strictly regulated by societal standards. He still, of course, given his station, feels that there is an obligation for him to meet these standards. Anything outside the regular gender binary, is, at this point, looked down upon.

James is very used to these prejudices, and has been forced to hide many of his own feelings and urges to meet the expectations of society. For him, it’s second nature, though it’s tiring, and he secretly wishes that things weren’t how they are. He knows that anything he does will be in the public eye, and that he must be careful to maintain the reputation of his family.

He may find your being nonbinary to be a bit strange, at first, but he doesn’t particularly see why there should be a problem with it. It’s not like he particularly cares about the gender of his partner, though he knows he can’t admit to it in polite company. He knows that the only thing that matters is who you are as a person. Don’t forget that he still loved Elizabeth when she dressed as a boy and ran off with pirates.

James won’t let anyone talk down to you, and will defend you from anyone who decides that they’re going to have an unwarranted opinion. He’s a rather intimidating man, and all he has to do is give someone a glare before they decide their presence might be needed elsewhere. He knows you can stand up for yourself and take care of yourself, but he doesn’t want anyone thinking that it’s anywhere near acceptable for them to be judging you. He has a bit of a protective streak.

Remember in AWE, when James began to have that idgaf attitude? Yeah, that’s the sort of attitude he begins to have about society’s expectations. To hell with other people’s opinions; it wasn’t as if they were going to decide your futures, anyway. He realizes it’s a lot more important to be with somebody he loves than to listen to societal standards.

His proposal, is, as expected, awkward, but you know that that’s just how he is, and that he has a hard time getting his emotions across. You accept, of course, and he gives you that giant grin that lights up the room. He’s in a bit of shock. He didn’t actually think he’d make it this far in life, so he’s somewhat stunned.

In any case, your actual wedding would be too adorable. James would want to go with the traditional, though he might not necessarily care for a church wedding at all (I’m not entirely sure what the options were, at this point), but he’d want to keep to most customs and find a nice outdoor venue that capitalizes on Port Royal’s good weather. It would probably be modest, because he’s not a super social person.

He is absolutely the type to cry when his partner walks down the aisle. He gets very emotional during the wedding, having always wanted a family, and he can’t believe he’s finally getting that. He wouldn’t take his eyes off of you the entire ceremony, and would hold your hands tightly the entire time, beaming that darling smile of his. For usually being so composed, it’s nice to see James showing earnest emotion for once.

You’d have a nice reception, attended, of course, by the Swann family, as well as many of James’ crew mates. Whetherby couldn’t be more happy for James, and Elizabeth couldn’t be more happy for you. All the boys in the navy would be losing it; they can’t believe that their emotionally constipated commanding officer is getting married. They would be ecstatic, to say the least.

Actual married life with James would be peaceful and domestic. He still can’t believe that he’s sharing his house with someone; it excites him, but makes him nervous at the same time. He wants you to feel at home. Having your things mixed in with his is a constant reminder to him that you’re sharing a space and a life together, and it feels a little surreal.

He’s as sweet as can be, doting on you all the time. James is just that way. He won’t make you do anything you’re uncomfortable with, even if that means sleeping in separate beds. That being said, James is the most touch starved person on the planet, and will melt right into your arms if you hold him. He would appreciate sleeping with you more than anything—just the sleeping, too. He can’t get enough of his arms wrapping around you, holding you close to him. He really enjoys casual, non-sexual intimacy.

You’d spend a lot of your time together at home, preferring to be around each other than going out places. James wouldn’t know what to do, at first, but eases into being less stiff and formal, realizing that he can just be with you instead of needing to act any certain way.

Seeing him relax has to be one of the best parts of your marriage. The way he loses the tension in his muscles the moment he gets home, taking a deep breath and greeting you with open arms, warmth, and love is nothing but endearing. The two of you will spend time reading toghether, whether you’re reading your own books or reading to each other. He likes being able to hold easy conversation with you, talking about his day and things from your pasts.

It takes some time for him to realize that he can open up about deeper things, too, but it only makes him love you all the more when he figures out that you’d rather help him with his problems than not hear them at all. Once he knows that he can come to you about anything at all, he immediately makes it clear that you can do the same to him, and he probably cries a little in relief and gratitude for how loved you make him feel.

He, of course, wants you to feel the same, and never puts any pressure on you to do things. He doesn’t expect you to be solely in charge of the upkeep of the house; he probably hires a maid to that effect. He also doesn’t expect you to cook, though he doesn’t mind nights when the two of you make a meal together, and enjoys that sort of time spent together. This usually ends up making a bit of a mess, but it’s a nice thing to do.

Communication is key between the two of you, so any arguments and problems are eventually solved in a way that satisfies both parties. Other couples don’t quite understand how your marriage seems consistently happy, but you both know the key is being able to sort out disagreements.

Over all, you’d lead a soft, sweet life together. James has always wanted a domestic life, and having one is easily the best thing that’s ever happened to him. That’s not to say that the two of you don’t share plenty of adventures, but at the end of the day (metaphorically) and the two of you are back home together, the world kind of melts away and you can be in a world of your mutual making.