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I dreamt of my former best friend today and woke up crying. She froze me out of her life 2 years ago and I still don't understand why. I can take emotional distance from anything else yet this creeps up on me once in a while to ruin my day.
#idk man I'm just feeling sad and lonely#like i didn't even do anything like wallowing while awake this time i just woke up with my brain being like#Yeah wasn't it nice when you still hung out with someone you basically wanted to platonically marry? Sucks that doesn't happen anymore huh.#Like Yeah does is actually? fuck you too?#i mean there's still our other friend who's been studying abroad for a few years. she should be back for good this summer#but her family moved across the country in the main time so she's not even near me#and it was always the three of us against the world. it feels like something broke there with her too. that's unfair to her ik#but i used to base part of my mental health on the solid base knowledge that my friends loved me and that pillar crumbled under my feet#like i think she loves me. but do i know? i thought so but apparently sometimes people you love *do* just get tired of you and leave#like huh who knew. seems my social distrust was right all along!#like there's no trust there anymore and i can't mister up the same strong feelings even if she *literally didn't do anything*#it's genuinely not her fault and I'd never tell her that either#it's just... every time i think about this for a moment i understand how people must feel when their partner of a decade cheats on them#it just fundamentally changes your ability to depend on other people and it isn't fair to anyone involved
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In the realm of romantic literature, it would be much appreciated if you could write Wolverine x Reader.
A tragic, angsty with a dash of spirited debate leading to an unforeseen outpouring of sentiments, tinged with a hint of mature themes. (18+)
[Dread not if such narratives are not within your repertoire.]
To put matters into more simplistic terms :
Wolverine/Logan Howlett x Reader. Angsty arguments turns rather bittersweet with an unexpected confession of feelings.
I hope this is sufficient!
"Lose You" - Logan Howlett x GN! Reader
WC: 2,485
Tw: Swearing, angst, yelling, Logan is a grumpy guy, mentions of sex, alluding to sex, broken glass
Requests are open!!
Three days. It has been three days since Logan had spoken to you, three long days since he even looked in your direction beyond a simple glance. You believed he was determined to ignore your existence for the rest of your life, and so did he. The manor was big enough for him to avoid you completely, except for the occasional glance exchange in the halls. His gaze was…cold…and distant. Nothing like it had been before. He seemed to hate you, and you began to hate yourself.
That inner loathing turned into an outwardly unpleasant mood, turning you into one of the more unpleasant mutants to interact with in the manor. After a couple extra days had passed, it has been a week since you talked to anyone beyond a short and angry conversation. Everyone in the manor knew what was happening, students and professors alike, but no one could do anything but watch the train wreck from a distance.
Soon enough it has been two weeks since Logan had talked to you, and you were fed up with him. Every time you even thought of him, you were overcome with an anger so strong it made you burst into tears and collapse to the ground. So, you did your best not to think about him, pushing him from your brain until he was just a distant memory.
One month. Your anger has turned into wallowing in pity and more self loathing. You couldn't believe that someone who you were once so close to would just abandon you completely like that. You locked yourself in your room most of your days, barely eating, barely sleeping. When you did sleep, the sleep was plagued with terrible nightmares. In the past, Logan would've been to your room in an instant to care for you after a nightmare, but recently there'd been nothing. He moved rooms to the other side of the manor, another means of avoiding you.
You woke up quickly, drenched in sweat, chest rising and falling rapidly from hyperventilating. Another nightmare has plagued your sleep, and there was no one there to soothe you. You wanted nothing more than to wrap your arms around Logan's neck and bury your face in his chest as he held you. But, he wasn't there, and the lack of his presence caused you to break down. Your entire body shook as you let out quiet, broken sobs.
You held your pillow close to your chest, the soft fabric of the case soaking up your warm, salty tears. You were like that for a few hours, until the sun rose, filtering through your blinds. Your face was red and puffy from crying for so long, eyes dry and in pain. You sighed softly and slipped out of bed, peeking your head out of your door. It was still pretty early, so not many people would be awake yet, so it was relatively safe to sneak to the kitchen to grab a glass of water.
You quietly made your way to the kitchen, slipping in to grab a glass of water before you stopped in your tracks. Logan was sat at the table, glass of whiskey in hand. It was obvious that he had been up for a while himself. Since this was your first time truly seeing him in a month, you felt your heart getting caught in your throat.
“L-Logan?” You muttered out loud before you could stop yourself.
He froze, his muscles tensing as he placed the glass of whiskey back down on the table. He didn't turn to meet your gaze, but he wasn't trying to up and leave, not yet anyway.
“Look at me Logan, please. “ You whispered with a broken whimper, your voice was pathetic. You couldn't believe how desperate you sounded - or how desperate you truly were.
“Get out of here, bub. “ Logan grumbled, not casting a glance in your direction.
Something about his tone set something off inside of you as you crossed your arms, voice shifting from whimpering and begging to annoyed. “ What, am I not allowed to grab a glass of water anymore? Oh I'm so sorry your highness,” you bowed, your voice laced with a mocking tone, “ I didn't realize what you said fucking goes. “
Logan tensed more at your tone and harsh words, hand gripping the glass with so much force you were surprised it wasn't breaking under the pressure. “Shut up. “ He grumbled, not quite a growl.
You walked over to the sink and grabbed a glass, filling it with water. When you were looking away, you could feel his piercing hot gaze on your skin. You spun around, glass of water shaking a little in your hand. “What the hell is your problem Logan?”
Silence filled your ears, which only made you more irritated.
“I asked you a fucking question, or are you suddenly too high and mighty to talk to someone commoner like me?” You sneered, watching as he gripped the glass tighter, it began to crack.
“Shut up. “ He growled, his breathing uneven and nostrils flaring.
“I don't think I will, because you've been a real dick recently, Wolvy. “
And with that mocking nickname, the glass shattered in his hand, pieces of glass sticking into his skin. You jumped a little bit, watching as he didn't even flinch, his hand just closing around the shards of glass.
A part of you grew very concerned for the gruff man, but you were still overcome with some anger and resentment towards him for having had the guts to ignore you for a whole month.
“Ooo the big scary wolverine can shatter a glass, you're not special. “ You sneered, taking a sip of your water.
Suddenly, without any warning, Logan was standing up, pushing you flush against the counter, hands on either side of you, caging you in. You dropped the glass you were holding out of shock, it fell to the floor and shattered, glass shards surrounding the two of you.
His breathing was ragged and unsteady, his eyes narrowed with anger. “Don't you know when to shut your mouth?” He growled, looking down at you.
“Don't you know when you're being a dick? Get your hands off of me, Logan. “
He huffed and took a step back, avoiding the shards of glass carefully, the shards in his hand slowly falling out as he healed. He stared at you, eyes narrowed and brows furrowed. He looked at you like he hated you, like he loathed you entirely. His gaze made you want to shrink and run away, but you stood strong, meeting his gaze.
“Why are you being such a brat?” He huffed, picking the glass out of his hand before sliding both of his hands into his pockets.
“Why am I being such a- Oh my God. Seriously? Seriously Logan?! You dare to have the gall to call me a brat when you have been nothing but a total douche recently?! Oh my God. “ You said, giving a soft laugh, surprised at his words. You shook your head in disbelief.
“I have not been a total-”
“Don't even try to finish that sentence, dickwad. Because news flash, you've been a complete asshole! You've been avoiding me ever since that last mission! Fuck, you even switched rooms just so you could be as far away from me as possible. Every time you look at me, you look at me like I'm the worst person in the world. And I…and I didn't even get an explanation. “ You started yelling, before your voice began to crack as you choked back tears. You were deeply wounded by his actions, especially by the fact that you never even got an explanation as to why he completely abandoned you.
His gaze softened slightly, his brows letting up as concern began to lace his features. It hadn't even dawned on him that his actions had been harming you like this, driving you to brink of insanity.
“What, now you got nothing to say?” You muttered, crossing your arms as your eyes began to water. You could feel tears threatening to spill over the threshold. Your chest was rising and falling harshly due to your uneven breathing.
“ I'm sorry. “ He muttered, so quietly that you could barely even hear him at first.
“A sorry ain't going to fix this, asshole.” You huffed, turning your head away from him, your bottom lip beginning to quiver.
“I never wanted to hurt you. I just…I'm mad at you. “
“You're mad at me?! Why on earth would you be mad at me?!” You cried out in disbelief.
“Because you almost got yourself killed!” He yelled back, the loud sound causing you to close your eyes right as you flinched, tears finally spilling past the threshold, falling down your face.
He saw the tears roll down your face and gave a heavy sigh. Now he had done it. “That…that last mission…you completely drained yourself and left yourself open to be attacked…I don't understand why you would do that.. “
“Why would you even care if I got killed? With the way you've been acting, I thought you hated me. “ You spat, your voice shaky as you held back sobs.
“I can't hate you. Nothing in the world could make me hate you. “ He spoke weakly. His voice began cracking, he could feel tears swelling in his own eyes. But he swallowed them back, not wanting to upset you further.
“Wha-” you began, before he cut you off.
“I didn't mean for it to go this far. But…when I almost lost you, I realized that … you deserve someone who can protect you better than I. I almost failed you. So I drove a wedge between us. “ He sighed, placing his head in his hands for a moment.
“Lose me? Logan, what do you mean?”
“ You can't technically lose something that you never had, but I wanted- no I needed- you to be mine.”
“Logan…” You whispered as you looked at him once again, eyes wet with tears. “You always had me. I was never going to belong to anyone else.”
You took a step forward, reaching out a hand tentatively. “I was protecting you…because I couldn't bear the thought of losing you…”
“You can't lose me…” He took a step closer as well, hand intertwining with yours.
“You don't know that for sure…” You stepped closer, your bodies now inches apart.
“I would rather die than live in a world where you're not by my side. “ He placed a hand on your hip, pulling you flush against his chest.
“That's stupid…” You buried your face in his chest, sniffling softly.
“People do stupid things for the ones they love. “
You pulled your face away from his chest and looked up at him in disbelief. “ You shouldn't love me. “
“Why the hell not?”
“Because…”
“Sweetheart, nothing you say could change how I feel about you. Simply put, you are my world. I revolve around you, day and night, and without you I feel like I'm suffocating. You are my oxygen, you are my source of life. “ He muttered softly, looking down at you.
“If I'm so vital to your survival…why did you avoid me for so long?”
“I don't deserve you. “
“And I deserve you?”
“Sweetheart, you deserve the absolute world. If the grumpy, old, gruff man is who you want, then it's the grumpy, old, gruff man you'll get. But is that who you want?” Logan asked as he tilted his head gently to the side, his eyes watering.
“You're the one I want, Lo, but are you sure that I'm the one you want? Because -”
Logan dipped down and captured your lips in a soft kiss, hand resting on your cheek. You were surprised, but quickly melted into it, leaning against him as you kissed him back gently. He was holding you so delicately, like he thought you were going to break if he touched you wrong.
After a moment, he pulled away from the kiss, “You're the one I need. “
You gave a weak smile, burying your face in his chest once again. “‘M sorry for being so terrible to you..” you sniffled gently.
He lifted your chin so you were staring into his eyes. “ I don't want to hear your apology, sweetheart. You did nothing wrong. “ He smiled gently down at you.
“But I was awful…how can I make it up to you?”
“Promise me that no matter what…you'll put yourself before me? That you'll never sacrifice yourself for anyone. I won't be able to survive without you. “
You thought for a moment about all the implications of making that promise, but his eyes were staring into you with so much sincerity, that you knew you had to promise. “ I promise, Logan. “
He sighed with relief and pulled you closer, pulling you into another soft kiss. You noticed more this kiss, how coarse his lips felt against your own, but they felt wonderful. They felt like they were molded specifically to fit perfectly against your own.
Slowly, the kiss became more passionate as the dam of emotions came undone. Both of you became more desperate to never stop kissing the other, your hand sliding under his shirt slightly, resting against his abs.
He paused and pulled away, swallowing hard. “ Sweetheart, I think we have to calm down here…otherwise I think I'll take it too far. “
“ What if I want you to take it too far?”
“Sweetheart, you can't say shit like that…”
“ I mean it, Logan. “
“Don't get me wrong…I need you, darling, but it's probably just a heat of the moment thing and I don't want you to regr-”
You cut him off with a kiss, pulling his head down by placing a hand on the back of his neck. You could taste the whiskey on his lips. You pulled away after a moment. “ Sorry, I just really needed you to shut up. “ You said softly, placing a hand on his chest and rubbing gently. “ I promise you I won't regret it, Lo. “
He pulled your hand off his chest gently. “ Trust me sweetheart, I desire you more than anything else, but I'm also…slightly drunk. And I want there to be no chance of forgetting what I'm going to do to you. But I promise you…tonight, come to my room, and I will ravage this…delicious body. “ He said softly as he pulled you close, pressing his hard on against you for a moment, causing you to gasp.
He let go of your hips and pulled away, a smirk evident on his face. “ See you tonight sweetheart, alright? “
“O- okay Logan…” you managed to get out, face a bright red from a moment earlier as he walked out of the kitchen, leaving you to clean up the shards of glass on the floor, your stomach doing flips.
Tonight was going to be one hell of a night.
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett fanfiction#logan howlett#wolverine x reader#wolverine#wolverine fanfiction#x men
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Baldur's Gate 3 Characters x Reader/Tav with childcare habits
[ Not sure what to title this. I work with toddlers and very small children, and there are so many habits that leak over into other things I do. Thought that it would be funny if Tav had the same problem. Not necessarily romantic relationships, it can be platonic too. This is written gender neutral so it can be any reader or Tav.]
Gale- There was a general air of exhaustion that hung over the camp. But, on the bright side, at least Gale could rest easy in the knowledge that there was a very powerful, easy to consume artifact in his hands. While he usually liked to go through the whole song and dance of this unfortunate requirement by himself, he didn’t mind if you were there. You had both seen each other in stranger situations by this point. Add to this that you looked like you were about to fall asleep at any moment, there wasn’t much to be self conscious about.
Just as Gale put the artifact to his lips, you suddenly moved his hand away, giving it a few gentle taps.
“Ick, ick! Makes a Gale sick.” You mumbled, not conscious enough to be considered awake before you rolled over and fell asleep proper.
Gale gave a tickled chuckle that was slightly tinged with the bitterness of the truth in the situation.
“Oh, believe me. I know.” He patted your shoulder and got back to the deed at hand.
Halsin- Everyone else had retired to their tents except Halsin and yourself. The both of you had offered to clean up the mess from dinner. You had talked for awhile, but finally got around to actually cleaning. The pot that was used to cook dinner was left too close to the fire, so it was still too hot to touch with your bare hands. You had used a cloth to move it away, and were waiting for it to cool off when Halsin came over to pick it up.
Moving faster than your thoughts, you moved away his hand while instinctively saying.
“Hot, hot for Halsin!”
You were hoping that he somehow didn’t hear what you had said exactly. And, when all he responded was a polite, “Thank you for the warning,” you thought he might have not. However, Halsin was literally biting his tongue to try not to laugh.
A few days later, he teased you by taking a lit torch from you and gently scolding, “Hot, hot for Tav.”
Astarion- Things haven’t been great for him lately. And, by lately, he meant decades. However, he could wallow in self pity later. Right now he needed to feed, and animal blood wasn't cutting it. Lucky that you seemed to put your bed roll a bit farther from the fire than the others in the group.
He quietly sneaked his way over to you, and prepared to strike. However, when his fangs hit your neck, things took an unexpected turn.
"No bites! Not nice!" You scolded in your sleep as your hand moved to rest on his forehead and gently push him away.
You suddenly woke up. The two of you stared at each other, neither saying anything. After an agonizing awkward few minutes, he walked away.
The next morning he pulled you aside from the rest of the party and sternly whispered, "Look- you don't mention that I'm a vampire and I won't tell them about the baby-talk."
Shadowheart- She and Lae'zel had gotten into an argument. Nothing new for either of them. This one really got under Shadowheart's skin this time.
"Can't believe that slimly toad of a woman thought she could pull something like that..." She grumbled as she stomped past you.
"Hey, are you using your kind words?" You asked.
This stopped her in her tracks and she turned to look at you, her anger almost completely replaced by myrth. "I'm sorry, what did you just say?" She questioned, her voice sounding as devious as she felt.
"Are you speaking well about our teammates?" You rephrased.
Raphael- He had insisted that he recite a new poem that he was working on, even if he had to wake you up to do so. Despite trying to stay awake, you couldn't help but doze off on Haarlep's shoulder. They didn't mind as, though they weren't physically tired, they would also rather be anywhere else. The two of you both being Raphael's quite literal captive audience.
"Oh, no. That most certainly is NOT what you asked me." Shadowheart teased. She wouldn't let you live this down for a long time. She's never too hard on you though.
Once the cambion had finished, he looked at the both of you expecting praise for his prose; Haarlep elbowed you just in the nick of time so you could sit up before Raphael noticed.
"Well?" He goaded.
"Truly, you have outdone yourself." Haarlep gave a purposefully unconvincing cheer.
Raphael rolled his eyes before moving his attention to you. "And, you, Tav?"
Still not fully aware of how you sounded or anything in the actual contents of the poem, you said, "Oh, how pretty, Raphael!" like you would have to a child that just gave you a finger painting.
The next thing you knew, Haarlep was rushing down the hall, you slung over their shoulder, their wings hitting your head with every movement, as they were laughing so hard it almost turned into a coughing fit. The quick escape must have been from the vaguely Raphael shaped fire right behind you, snapping and flinging blazes your direction while cursing and yelling about you not knowing what true art is.
Haarlep- They had heard that you had taken a pretty nasty hit to the head. Still, they hadn't quite expected what they were greeted with when they went to take stock of your condition like they were asked to. (Nurse work wasn't usually in their duties, but Raphael couldn't be bothered to do this himself.)
They appeared in your room to see you sitting on your bed, staring at nothing.
"Knock, knock, little mortal." They announced their presence which tore your eyes away from the space you were looking at.
You looked at them for a moment before giving a exasperated sigh.
"Where are your clothes?" You asked.
They blink a few times, not knowing how else to respond. "I beg your pardon?" They eventually asked.
You walked over to your closet and started digging through it. Eventually you walked over with a completely mixed matched set of clothes. "You have to wear something. You can't just run around in your undies!" The last part was very exaggerated as you lightly pinched and wiggled their nose.
They immediately returned to Raphael with you in tow. "It's worse than we thought." Was all they said as they sat you down and walked away.
Gartash- To say that Enver Gortash's work and habits were messy would be an understatement. It was certainly no different tonight. He had gotten blood and viscera all over him. And, seeing as he loved to get a rise out of you, he chose not to wash it off before going to find you.
When he saw you reading, he took a moment to compose himself to seem as though nothing was amiss, and walked calmly up to you.
"Anything interesting in your books today?" He asked, barely holding his excitement to hear you yell at him.
You started to say something, but when you turned to look at him you took a cloth from your pocket. Reaching up, you rubbed the blood from his face; each pass of the cloth was acompanied with a sing-song, "Wipe, wipe, wipe, wipe, wipe."
Gortash was baffled and indignant that he didn't get the reaction he wanted. He smacked your hand away and yelled, "What in the hells was that?!"
"Sorry," you offered sheepishly, "force of habit."
#bg3 x reader#bg3 gale x reader#bg3 gale x tav#shadowheart x tav#shadowheart x reader#gale dekarios x tav#gale dekarios x reader#bg3 gale#bg3 astarion#bg3 astarion x reader#bg3 astarion x tav#astarion ancunin x reader#astarion ancunin x tav#bg3 halsin#bg3 halsin x reader#bg3 halsin x tav#halsin silverbough x reader#halsin silverbough x tav#bg3 shadowheart#bg3 shadowheart x reader#bg3 shadowheart x tav#bg3 raphael#bg3 raphael x reader#bg3 raphael x tav#bg3 haarlep#bg3 haarlep x reader#bg3 haarlep x tav#bg3 gortash#bg3 gortash x reader#bg3 gortash x tav
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Never bloom again
Jung Jaehyun x female reader
Based on: never bloom again by waterparks
You and Jaehyun had been dating for 9 months, and you had decided to move in together, with a house in LA. Jaehyun was your favourite place, he was your escape from reality, and he never failed to sweep you off your feet.
"Good morning darling" he came and pressed a kiss on your collarbone and have you a back hug while you stood at the stove cooking breakfast. You hummed happily in response, continuing to fry your eggs. "Jaehyun baby, could you go and set the table" "of course princess" he said, detatching himself from you to and set the table. You plated up the food, and took it into the dining room, gently placing them opposite each other so you could look at Jaehyun and talk to him over breakfast. He smiled contently at you as he say down, you focusing on his cute little dimples, and how prominent they were when he smiled.
You two talked over breakfast. And then you helped him put his jacket on and fixed his pretty hair before he kissed you and left for work.
The days always went slow when Jaehyun was at work, so you called your best friend Karina and chatted about nothing. Once the clock hit 2, you started preparing Jaehyun a snack for when he got in, like you always did. And you left it with a little note next to the plate that said "Hi handsome, I'm in the shower, but when I get out I'll be there to cuddle you" And you headed upstairs.
As you turned the shower off, clicking the head back into place, you heard the back door slam closed. You hurriedly dry yourself and get dressed and practically throw yourself down the stairs "Jae you're home" you squeak excitedly, but he just ignores you. You notice he looks upset, and he didn't eat his snack either. "What's wrong Jae you look sad, and you seem distant" He just huffed in response and you try to hug him to imply you're here for him but he just pushes you away.
You decide to give him space and you go and sleep at Karinas house, leaving breakfast in the fridge for Jaehyun and a note on the side. Karina tried to assure you that everything is fine, and Jaehyun probably just had a bad day. You still can't sleep regardless, worrying about what could possibly be that bad.
Jaehyun pov:
I didn't want to do it. I feel so bad, but it's all for work. I can't just leave my princess without telling her why. But if I tell her anything I'll get fired. Jaehyun lead awake all night thinking, knowing he has to leave in the morning without telling you why. He tried to write a not to even explain something to you, but he didn't know how to say it. So he just write a sentence and left.
Reader pov again:
When you get home in the morning, you see a little tatty teddy holding a heart, and a note that said "sorry princess, it will all make sense one day" and that's when you realised he was gone. You sobbed for hours, rereading the note a thousand times, though the tears were blurring your vision. You decided to just wallow in self pity, dancing around the living room to lover of mine. You just didn't understand.
You both suffered for the next few weeks, Jaehyun waking up a four am and wishing he was home again. You realising just how much you needed Jaehyun to function. It only got harder and harder. You knew what it was like to be alone, but it has never stung like this before. You just wished you never left him alone that day. You wanted to give him space but you stepped away from his brain. But what you didn't know is that you never left his mind. Everyone he saw looked like you from a distance, not because there was any resemblance, but because he wanted to see you. Every night you were both restless, thinking of each other, taking sleep until you were dreaming.
You decided, on tuesday, you were flying around to go and find him. You called Jaehyuns friend doyoung.
"What is it"
"Tell me where he's gone"
"I can't tell you anything"
"Doie please" he could hear the desperation in your voice.
"Look y/n, I'm sorry but I just can't tell you what's going on, I can't tell you why he left, I can't tell you who he left with"
"He left with someone" your voice was weak and sounded somewhat heartbroken.
"Don't worry, it's not like that, he didn't leave with someone to forget about you, he still loves you I promise"
"Doie where is he"
"Korea." He sounded a little shy and scared " but don't tell him I told you" he added quickly
"I won't, thank you for your service"
A plane ticket to Korea, how expensive.
You woke up on the Tuesday, determined to go find Jaehyun. You fell asleep for most of the plane ride, exhausted from spending 3 weeks sleep deprived and sobbing most of the time.
What you didn't know, is that Jaehyun had quit his job to go back to you. And just as you stepped off the plane, Jaehyun entered your home in LA.
All he found when he entered the house was his lonely words "sorry princess, it will all make sense one day"
You were gone, he didn't know where to, and he never found out the Doyoung knew where you were. He knows you are his one and only, and he'll never bloom again
Requests
#jaehyun#nct u x reader#nct 127#jaehyun fluff#jung jaehyun#jeong jaehyun#nct dream#Wayv#nct jaehyun fluff#jaehyun x reader
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