#like i said no rules just right we vibin tonight

[a-mir-mortal]

Very rough doodles I did a couple weeks ago without a real attempt at reference. Just vibes and a pencil tool I had never previously employed.  

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Xtreme Rumble 2020 (4-26-2020)

XPWEW Xtreme Rumble 2020 April 26th 2020 Denver, Colorado Denver Coliseum

SHOW OPENS WITH PYROTECHNICS

We are introduced to tonight’s commentary team of Kaitlyn Khaos and Nick Simmonds and they run down the card and explain the importance that is the Xtreme Rumble match and it gives the winner a golden ticket to be in the main event of the biggest event in XPWEW history: Lockdown 7 on May 23rd, 2020 in the platinum shimmering city of Dubai on the waterfront now let’s kick it over to James Westerbeck at ringside bell rings

James Westerbeck: The following contest is a TABLES MATCH! The rules of this contest are You must put you opponent through a table!

Joe Gacy enters holding both tag team titles (Commentary explains how this match came to be, When Solomon Nasty appeared plucked from nowhere and wanted to be Joe Gacy’s tag team champion partner despite not impressing Gacy for the last month on Friday Night Pyro and now the ultimate challenge awaits Soloman, Gacy’s favorite matchup. A tables match.

Solomon Nasty enters

Tables Match 1 on 1 M1: Joe Gacy defeats Solomon Nasty

General Manager Romeo Roselli enters and walks down to ringside turns the corner and walks up to the timekeeper and grabs both Tag Team Titles. Gacy looks perplexed and a bit heated.

Romeo Roselli: Joe it’s been 30 days since Brodie Croyle was injured and you were asked at my discretion I’ll admit, you were unable to find a tag team partner so I am going to be stripping you of the XPWEW Tag Team Championships! (Crowd yells)

Gacy: Why.....Why...Where are the articles of confederation when you need them (shuffling trying to grab the belts tucked in Romeo’s left arm)

Romeo: But Joe I’m not leaving you in the dark. As successful and Plagueground was for the past 6 months that era must come to an end, pending injury and inability to find a replacement but Joe. I’m a fair GM. You are in line for these belts, That’s right Joe I’m making you the Number One Contender! BUT I took the liberty upon myself to find you a replacement because since YOU can’t seem to do that. I did it for you. So meet your new tag team partner

Audrey Carbine enters

((Joe Gacy blows the hair out of his face kinda groaning at the thought of Audrey being his new tag team partner))

((Joe Gacy jerks the mic out of Romeo’s hand))

Joe Gacy: THIS? She’s a woman, She’s weak, She’s vulnerable and to me, a wrestler who has applied his craft all over the world!! This is an insult To me and No, No I will

((Audrey Carbine power walks right up to Gacy’s face))

Audrey Carbine: “Shut up Pussy” (crowd ooohs))

Audrey Carbine: “I was a highly ranked official in the American Army for 8 years and I served four tours in iRaq while you sat on your ass playing Modern Warfare (crowd oohs again) I’m not too excited on being your partner myself but I’ve been itching for a fight since I got here and you’ve just been itching for relevancy Joe admit it (crowd oohs) The Tag Team division in xpwew is weak and that’s one trait that I’m not. So you’re either gonna hate me or you’re gonna tolerate me but together we’re gonna be The Death Machines

Joe Gacy: “Audrey, you .....I gotta singles career to focus tonight in the Xtreme Rumble” (crowd reacts mixed)

Backstage Segment: Troy Clausen standing with two unnamed women (just pretty faces to spin the tumbler) Troy Clausen: Ladies tonight my son Champagne Clausen is going to be entering at the number 29 right? Lol yeah we’ll See I hired this other guy named (gibberish)

The Set walks in (Myron, Kotto and Jordan) Jordan: “Woahhh T-Roy Clausen Whatup Dogg Troy: “Vibin’ pimps, Vibin’” Jordan: Myron? Myron: Yessir! Jordan: Tonight is one of them special nights you know cause look at the probability Me, You, Kotto, Ruckus we got 4 chances of winning this whole shit and turning Lockdown to SetDown Kotto: Aha! I mean how they gon’ act when young Kotto Brazil pull up and win the rumble you feel me, I see the hate tho I love it love (The Set all joking around) Jordan:

(((Jacques Dudley waltzes in and just goes straight to picking his number and before he’s about to leave))) Jordan: Oh look who it is, Croissant Dudley LOL you grabbing another number for D-Von (The Set snickering) Jacques: Hmm Nice joke Ellen, You giving away a car next? Jordan: Man Shut your punk ass up before I slap you around in that ring tonight Busta ((Myron and Kotto react to their numbers with a “Meh so so” reaction)) Myron and Kotto: What you got J? What you got? Jordan: ((((I don’t know,,,Nah nah nah Jacques you trade me?)))) Jacques: ppfft trades numbers (((Both open at the same time)) Jacques reacts “WOW Thanks Jordan, see ya out there Jordan: (under his breath: Pfft Fuck outta my face) Myron and Kotto looking over his shoulder Jordan opens up his number ((Myron and Kotto start looking at each other )))( Jordan: Maaaaan this whole shit whack man what damn number he then then? Man shit The Set walks away Tumbler Girl #1: Wow what number did he get? Troy: 4 Tumbler Girl #2: How do you know? Troy: Magic

Jacques Dudley enters

Jordan Oliver enters with Siaka Lexoni

XPWEW Juniorweight Championship 1 on 1 M2: Jordan Oliver def. Jacques Dudley

After one hellacious closing back and forth of reversals Jordan turning Jacquesms spinwill armdrag into a tombstone piledriver for the 1-2-3 and Jordan Oliver is still the xpwew Juniorweight champion

Backstage Segment:

Garrett Thompson and Ethan Bedlam are in their reading their numbers and Slayer walks in with Rosemary and Lotus

Troy: Not gonna speak Slayer Slayer: looks at Troy and leaves

Leonard McGraw enters bumping Slayer’s shoulder intentionally Leonard: Is something funny? Garrett: Yeah as a matter of fact it is, Look at you walking in here lookin bloody ridiculous with that stupid hat Leonard: You don’t like my hat? Garrett: Well quite frankly Leo its a bit worn out it looks like a damn travesty, What is that a fish hook? You are one putrid Longfellow Leonard: I like to fish. I like to hunt. I like Wayne Newton. Is that a problem? Garrett: I don’t care what you do in your spare time living in a trailer park Leonard: Garrett Thompson you big sum bitch. I said I like to hunt. I don’t play games. You are game. You, Ethan Bustass over there you’re game. Y’all some bucks to me. 10 pointer and he’s bout a 4 pointer. I’m looking for ya out there in the rumble and I’m taking your sorry ass out of misery because it’s open season on the xpwew locker room and I’m fixing to cook something to eat. Now Garrett what’s so funny....... Leonard and Garrett lock eyes ((Garrett walks away)) ((Leonard McGraw grabs a number and winks at the tumbler girls) Leonard: Now What the fuck we got going on, Are any good numbers left Stretch? Troy: Gotta be something Leonard Leonard: Ah shit ima just dig down in the bottom and grab two of these here and let you pretty ladies pick one of em’ which one darling? ((Tumbler Girl #2 picks the left)) Leonard: “Oh sweet Jesus this better be a good one. If it’s bout 25 I’ll kiss ya on the lips let me see ((Opens number) Leonard: Fuck! Godamnit to hell. (Leonard locks the number back up and throws it back in the tumbler) (Leonard storms off) Troy looks pissed he ruined the sanctity of this rumble

Brutus The Barber Beefcake enters with a staff worker pushing the chair and barber shop utensils down to ringside

James Westerbeck: The following contest is for the xpwew women’s championship and it will be contested in a Hair Match The winner of this match will shave the loser’s hair bald

Prisiclla Kelly enters

Kiera Hogan with Brian Lee enters

XPWEW World Women’s Championship Hair vs Hair 1 on 1 M3: Prisiclla Kelly defeats Kiera Hogan

AND NEW!!!!! Xpwew Women’s Champion Prisiclla Kelly!

After the match Brian Lee tries to grab Kiera and escape but Priscilla is able to rub him down and grab the kendo stick used against her earlier in the match and whack Brian Lee at the knees then repeatedly whack him across the back until he pleas up the ramp

Brutus The Barber Beefcake secures Kiera Hogan at ringside who’s kicking and screaming to squirm her way out of this Prisiclla taunts with Brutus’ shears and then cuts a huge chunk of Kiera’s weave The Prisiclla takes her time cutting big chunks with small scissors for a while (((Is Kiera Hogan crying?))) Prisiclla then takes the heavy duty hair clippers and does a streak down the middle of Kiera’s head and we now see scalp of the former women’s champ ((Kiera screaming)) Prisiclla then quickly keeps going over and over until Kiera is left bald

Priscilla grabs her title and laughs up the ramp

Brutus let’s Kiera go Kiera is sobbing uncontrollably and doing a fit at ringside and during her rage she grabs a hold of Nick Simmonds shirt and says “This is your fa-ha ha ha hault”

Ad: Golden Bryce BANG Energy

Ad: Lockdown 7 is 27 days away

We swing it back to commentary and Kaitlyn Khaos reviews what we’ve seen tonight from Joe Gacy being stripped of the tag team titles and Audrey Carbine being appointed by GM Romeo Roselli as his new partner then we seen Jordan Oliver and Jacques Dudley tear the house down and we just witness Kiera Hogan being humiliated by Prisiclla Kelly as she lost her title then was shaved BALD and coming up next to world heavyweight champion Golden Bryce just has one more hurdle to cross and he will be going into Lockdown for the 2nd year in a row as world champion

VIDEO PACKAGE : All Man vs Golden Bryce feud history

All Man with All Woman enters

Golden Bryce enters

XPWEW World Heavyweight Championship 1 on 1 M4: Golden Bryce (c) defeats All Man w/ All Woman

((All Man put up a fight and didn’t come across as weak as he did during their Flirting With Disaster PPV match last February the match ended when All Man had to match in his favor but when on the to rope looking for a Super-Plex he hyperextended his leg and landed on the ropes completely falling crotch first between the ropes (he oddly backed himself up to about the middle). All Man stood straddling the ropes with his crotch there long enough for Bryce to regain composure jump off the top rope and hit a very very awkward crooked version of the 6 rings. All Man gets untangled in the ropes and Bryce gets up yanks him out the ropes and pins him 1-2-3 Odd finish, Unique finish but the crowd really was expecting a kick out so the response was delayed. Just a weird match

AND STILL XPWEW WORLD CHAMPION: GOLDEN BRYCE

M5: Ruckus wins XPWEW 2020 Xtreme Rumble Match