#like would it be violent controlling manic or distant avoidant depressed? it was a surprise
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local man forced to think about their father: one dead, countless injured.
#eliot posts#i just got a gift in the mail from him#he almost always gave us gifts on valentines day#it's like. he was sweet sometimes yknow?#but he's also the same man who shoved me against a wall and threatened to stab me in a fit of drunken rage that one time#he used to put me on his shoulders to pick fruit from the tall branches to bake pies with#he also used to mock me til i was near tears for his own amusement#he'd stay in my bed with me when i was little and gave myself nightmares from watching too many of those cryptid documentaries#but also he stunk of booze and once was so drunk he pissed himself in my bed and i had to scrub myself off before going to kindergarten#it's. easier to deal with my feelings about my mother in some ways#she was just. pretty consistently awful.#sometimes the *ways* in which she was awful varied (i think she's who i inherited the bipolar from)#like would it be violent controlling manic or distant avoidant depressed? it was a surprise#but i could kinda count on the fact that like yeah whatever she sees me as a burden no matter what. whatever.#but with my dad... oof. much more complicated.#abuse mention
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