#mad max headcanons

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Max Rockatansky Dating Headcanons

[monsterbrush]

SO. I've been reading your asks, definitely giggling the whole time but I have a question about the nasty lizard. You covered pets, friendship/romance, and even his sexual preferences BUT... What if something killed his favorite f*** buddy? What would he do? How do you think he'd react? I don't mean a lover dying historic or losing a battle with fever, I mean bloody MURDER. What are Slit's stages of grief?

OHOHOHO I think we all know where this is gonna go. 

Warning for extremely unhealthy coping mechanisms, suicide, self harm, and depression, Slit is not gonna handle this well.

Disclaimer: I’m basing this on a Slit without significant character development. It is my personal interpretation of the character and can be subject to change.

Since the line between fuck-buddy and friend is kinda thin for Slit, his reactions to the aforementioned scenario are gonna be pretty damn similar between the two, and it is also important to note that it will not matter to Slit whether his partner deserved what they got or not, or that Slit might have done the same were the circumstances reversed, all that matters to Slit is his partner has been killed. What’s more is his partner has been abruptly taken from him and he. Is. Pissed. 

Slit doesn’t go into shock very often, and when he does, it is quickly followed by blistering anger. Anger is his automatic response to most things, it is his default, it’s how he protects himself from feeling soft, or sad, or scared, so his mind jumps to anger in situations like this. It’s just easier for him this way. So his shock doesn’t last long, he dives headfirst into his anger, channels it, fuels himself on it, and attacks. This line of action has two outcomes, so let’s explore them both shall we?

Option one: Slit gets his revenge. In his rage he will brutally slaughter the focus of his anger. Depending on his current level of coherence he will either kill them fast or choose to make them suffer first. Morals mean very little to Slit. He is mad, and they are to blame, so whatever he does to them is justified. It’s one of the things that make him such an effective War Boy—maybe not when directed towards his fellow Boys, but towards enemies it makes him very nice to have on your side unless you’re big on the whole “No unnecessary killing” thing, because Slit’s definitely gonna throw a wrench in that.

Naturally, once his enemy is dead Slit’s at bit of a loss. His partner is gone, and now so is the person that killed them. He might take his lingering frustration out on his surroundings, kick the corpse around a little bit longer etc. He’ll wear himself out until he can barely stand. War Boys aren’t taught to grieve for their fallen brothers, so with his anger out of the way Slit just… shuts down. He wanders around on cruise control. Doesn’t really do much here or there. His partner is gone, there’s a massive hole where they’re meant to be, so Slit does what any War Boy would do and gets the hell away from that. He changes bunks. He stops visiting the places where he and his partner used to hang out at. Avoids anything to do with them. He keeps their memory close sure, maybe carves a little doodle or two into his stomach to commemorate them, to take his mind off of it all—it’s his own twisted way of coping, being soft without being soft. 

If left to his own devices he’ll be quick to find his way to Valhalla, not out of glory but more out of a lack of seeing something else to live for. He can’t move on from this on his own. Slit’s not good at making new friends, he knows that, and he knows how unlikely it is for him to find someone else to fill the space his partner left, and he might not even want someone else, he wants his partner. So naturally Valhalla is his best bet, it’s impressed upon War Boys enough that dying in glory is what they might consider the only natural response to something like this. His partner is usually the one to help him out with his emotions and things so without them there’s not much he can do by himself in this regard, emotional support is vital and he does not have a lot of it. So he chases Valhalla in a blazing ball of fire and that’s it. That’s the end. 

Option two: Something stops him. Slit gets restrained, held back, or otherwise kept from achieving his desired revenge or dying in the attempt because you know damn well it wasn’t a sudden emergence of empathy that stayed his hand, and now Slit is left to fester. He is unsatisfied, stewing in his rage. It simmers and burns, churning his guts. He lashes out at everyone with the slightest provocation. Anything becomes worthy of a punch in the teeth to Slit. Any tiny little infraction. Without expressing his rage towards the one who killed his partner he inflicts it on everyone else instead, and when that isn’t enough he takes his frustration out on his environment, throwing things, hitting things, breaking things. Instead of avoiding the memory of his partner he soaks himself in it, he clings to the idea of vengeance and doesn’t let go. Never forgive, never forget. Under the right circumstances even Immortan Joe himself could become the target of his rage, if an adequate reason isn’t given for Slit to more easily accept his partner’s death. Gods and kings mean nothing to someone like Slit, it’s all about who’s on top, Slit knows that better than he knows God. As someone whose morals are so loose and subjective, his religious views are much the same. They are a means to an end for Slit. If something isn’t working, he either changes it to suit his needs or abandons it entirely. He’ll burn for himself before he burns for a God, his devotion ends where his God ceases to benefit him.

It is more than likely that this scenario ends with Slit destroying himself in some violent explosive death fueled by the rage he’s marinated himself in like a box of fireworks soaked in gasoline that’s been lit by a match, but on the off chance he does eventually achieve the revenge he so desperately sought after he is actually much better off for it (a relative term, nothing about how he is handling this is okay). Delayed gratification is one hell of a drug. Slit feels satisfied, he can move on with his half-life now, he can rest easy knowing the person who took his partner from him finally got what Slit felt in his soul they deserved. Now Slit can move on. He still probably ends up going to Valhalla, but that’s what War Boys are taught to do. 

Regardless of how things come to pass, Slit becomes self-destructive either way. His coping mechanisms are not healthy in the slightest. He doesn’t handle grief well. Or helplessness, or loss, or fear, etc. 

One might say he takes after Max Rockatansky when it comes to the loss of a loved one (haha that was a terrible joke, I’m so sorry Max). 

Ideally he needs intensive emotional support, a firm hand, someone to walk him through what he is feeling and support him through it, and an outlet for his emotions. Even then, the road to recovery is bumpy as all hell, as anyone who has experienced loss of that magnitude can tell you, and Slit will struggle and hurt practically every step of the way, but if he has even one of those things his chances of coming to terms with his partner’s death and moving on are better than if he is left to his own devices.  

[floating-world-pictures]

I saw a text post (that now I can't find) pointing out that Slit throws a thunder stick at the Buzzard just as Morsov kamikrazies himself into it, and I find this really interesting and telling of Slit's character.

He is an asshole, yes, and a shit-talker, but this is not, I think, an example of that. I mean, could you imagine how awful it would have been for Morsov to not die instantly there? It seems to take several well aimed blows to really get the Buzzards, and for all Slit's shit-talking after it, I think he was just making sure Morsov was going to make it to Valhalla.

Slit isn't exactly affectionate and my head canon is that he's actually really going to miss Morsov so he called Morsov mediocre because a V8 salute would have been too, I don't know, earnest and honest a reaction to Morsov's death and right then Slit needed to keep his emotions in check, he couldn't give himself the luxury of a more genuine goodbye.

[awellboiledicicle]

Mad Max Term Proposal

We know that mechanics/Repair Boys are referred to as “Black thumbs” because they work on cars, due to the grease.

We also know that Immortan Joe uses laborers [either Mill Rats or the semi-skilled people from tower 1] to work the gardens in the Citadel and those people are referred to as “Green thumbs.”

I propose that, since it’s confirmed on the Wiki that Tower 2 of the Citadel houses medics to tend to the Bloodbags and Warboys-- this implies that there are likely people being trained in that discipline. 

I propose that people in the Citadel refer to those people who do medical things, but are not fully Organic Mechanics-- or perhaps, a warboy that turned out to be healthy enough to be expected to live long enough that teaching him that skill would be useful-- i propose these people are called “Red thumbs”.

For, well, similar reasons to the blackthumbs, really.

[hawkhills]

a concept: the older vuvalini (well, everyone around that age in the entire franchise, really) are millenials. the world-wide wars broke out when they were already adults, so they grew up with television and social media and all that shit we know and are used to now. they always make jokes no one younger than them understands.

“these carrots just won’t grow nicely. i don’t know keep, it’s like they’re cursed or something” “ah, well then. who we gonna call?” “.......” “ghostbusters!” “............??” and then keeper and the other millenial vuvalinis hum the song for three days straight

or “god, life was so much easier with google” “ ???? but keep your goggles are right here what are you talking about”

or saying something like “sure, and elvis is not dead right” when they hear something ridiculous and everyone else is like what the heck is an elvis. trying to explain the internet to the kids. re-telling the movies they grew up on like the star wars scene from“reign of fire”. singing early 2000s pop songs absentmindedly bc lets be real, that’s the kind of music that sticks with you for years. getting super excited when they stumble upon an old bookstore and find a readable version of harry potter because “oh my god, these were my favorite books back in 2010′s”

[mrcorkus]

Headcanon that Capable snorts when she laughs ♡

[vetotheanchor]

Thoughts on Warboy Mourning

I just listened to a sad song and thought of Veto mourning his brotherfriend Ysa... Like, I headcannon that while warboys are proud to die and all that jazz, they still mourn for those they were close to. Like after their death, the survivor starts to notice that the cold is just a little bit colder, the nights are just a little bit darker, and the days just start fading together. At night, when they think no one is paying attention they’ll let out a couple soft sobs, muttering under their breaths a hushed one sided conversation. War boys are sad little things, constantly surrounded by death. And especially if the person close to them didn’t go out in a blaze of glory. Like if they went out soft and sick, or died in an accident, or was just MIA after a raid. Things that are generally thought less of, so they don’t even have the for sure comfort they will see their friend on the other side of the gates when their time comes... Like, fuck man.. War boys..

[lonelysavioroftheuniverse-blog]

As I was re-watching Mad Max, I realized I remembered the wive’s introduction sequence as much more sexually framed than it actually was. And that speaks a lot to what I’m used to seeing on screen. 

[awellboiledicicle]

Warboy Shitposting Headcanon

That No One Asked for at 1am. It occurred to me that Australia, the place in which Mad Max: Fury Road takes place, has many gemstones in it. It also occurred to me that Warboys dig around out of boredom in their free-time and also in the belongings of their captives. And that they may find said shinies, then it occurred to me they may find raw stones and have no clue what those are. Theory mostly under the cut for length.

Raw Opal for reference: 

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[hawkhills]

im like 500% sure that as soon as max got out of that crowd in the citadel the adrenaline wore off and he just faceplanted straight into the sand right where he stood. when everything settled down a bit some people heard him snoring or smth and were like ‘hey isnt that the guy furiosa was leaning on? ‘yeah thats her guy we probably should return him to her’ so they just picked him up and after asking the wives what to do they took him to furiosa’s room and tossed him on the bed next to her cause in the meantime she passed out of exhaustion as well. then like fifteen hours later the both wake up and she’s like ‘oh good youre not gone’ and he kind of just ‘…..???’ but goes with it 

[redlight-greenelight]

You know what web browser Nux would use if he had internet?

Google Chrome

[warboyheadcanons]

For people who didn't understand my description; this is what I meant. I always assumed that War Boys slept in things like this, like where the skeleton is. Does anyone know the name of them? They're usually in like, catacombs?

[monsterbrush]

At this point, I think we are both fueling each-other's desire to learn more about Slit, aren't we? I have no issue with this arangement. I have many questions and you seem to have just as many detailed answers! So, one more good one to help me through exam session- if one DOES manage to capture the attention of the Nasty Lizard King and starts engaging in a romantic relationship with him, how does Slit act? What should one expect when courting Slit, on both a physical and emotional level?

I agree wholeheartedly with this statement, and I do indeed have very many answers! Including answers to the query you have just now posed!

Once again, I must put my thought-gush below the cut:

So, you’ve attracted the attention of the Lizard King. The wooing process is over, Slit’s sexy lil display has paid off and you are now being dragged bodily into a relationship with said Lizard? Well, buckle up my friend! Imma address this from the perspective of a Slit without significant character development (this relationship dynamic is not for everyone and can be easily changed to fit specific character relationships, differing headcanons etc, I am always happy to hear other thoughts and ideas and by all means I urge you to indulge me).

Slit doesn’t get along well with most people. In fact, it can be said that he doesn’t along well with anybody, even people he likes. So how will he treat someone during courtship?

Slit’s approach to relationships that last longer than a quick tryst is a lot like having Friends with Benefits. War Boys don’t have a concept of “dating”.  War Boys don’t have a concept of “romance” either, so you can’t expect much in terms of romantic gestures. War Boys have best mates, and sometimes best mates will fuck. Or, sometimes War Boys will just fuck, no strings attached. A canteen of Mother’s Milk is like getting your girlfriend a puppy on her birthday, a choice bite of lizard or a hot dinner is like a bouquet of flowers. It’s all quite simple.

Now, what is Slit like as a romantic partner?

Let’s start with cons: He is demanding. Once he finds something he likes, he’ll want more, and he’ll find a way to get more. It takes a firm hand to keep him from walking all over his partners (but Nux is used to wrestling Slit back into line). Slit likes back scratches, massages, and any manner of being rubbed or squeezed or otherwise touched the way he likes. He will turn to his romantic partner for these things, leaning his full weight on them until he gets his way, and he will not be easily deterred.

Another con is this: Slit is a lounge lizard, and he throws his weight around even in his sleep, forcing people to accommodate him at the threat of being pummeled. He will sleep in the middle of the floor and then fight anyone foolish enough to trip on him, regardless of whether or not it was his fault for sleeping there in the first place. Being with Slit means keeping him out from underfoot, and far be it from him to make that easy. In a modern setting, Slit may drop for a nap in the middle of the kitchen because the cool tile floor feels nice during a hot day, or he’ll sleep in the hallway because the carpet there is thick and soft. In the Citadel, he will sleep on top of cars, on ledges, on platforms, any place reasonably comfortable where the foot traffic is minimal, and it’ll probably be somewhere mildly inconvenient for someone else. 

If War Boys had the luxury of blankets, Slit would hog it, despite being as hot as a furnace what with all that muscle mass, and he will take up as much space as he can wherever he can. It takes a bit of wrestling and elbowing to get him to make enough room for his romantic partner (unless he’s in a more salacious mood, in which case he will make room and put them in it). On colder nights his partner might wake up to being crushed with Slit’s arms around them and his weight on their back. A key feature about Slit is that he likes to be on top, and it is as much literal as it is metaphorical. He likes resting his full weight on something/someone and just lying there, so finding oneself being unwillingly pulled beneath his bulk and pinned underneath him until morning is not uncommon. Being smushed is par for the course with Slit. If nothing else, he’ll at least keep them warm and safe.

When it comes to food, Slit eats a lot. He will finish his food with gusto and then he will turn on his partner for more. Slit’s partners must keep one eye on Slit at all times during meals, lest he pick at their portions while their back is turned. Keeping Slit fed is important, a hungry Slit gets vicious, mean, grumpy, and—most importantly—sluggish. A hungry Slit is a slow Slit, and this is not a good thing when it comes to Slit’s Pros.

So, the Pros: he is Strong and On Your Side. A large benefit to having Slit as a romantic partner is that he will have your back in a fight, and having Slit on your side in any brawl immediately gives you a great advantage since, as I’ve mentioned before, he is big and fighty, thus keeping him fed is important. Fuel for the Fight Machine.

Now, this doesn’t mean his partner will forever sacrifice half of their meals to him, in fact if they put up enough fuss Slit might just leave their plate alone in favor of easier targets. Slit recognizes that the dynamic he creates requires a certain level of mutual benefit for it to be long-lasting, so it’s in his better interests to keep his partner pleased (or, you know, not totally pissed at him). 

Slit will bring his partner food throughout the day as an unspoken exchange—just don’t point it out or ask whose pocket it came from, just eat. He’s very proactive when it comes to procuring tools, scrap, food, etc. Providing for his partner secures his worth to them in his mind, he thinks they’ll value him more for being able to get them things that they want or need, and being fighty means being able to take those things from others and walk away relatively unscathed. It’s an odd combination of his desire to serve and provide for his partner—his need to be useful/worth something—and his innate urge to be Large and In Charge that can make his behavior very conflicting and explosive.

Despite his rudeness, thoughtlessness, selfishness, and general bad attitude, he does care, he just shows it in rather pragmatic ways. Taking care of his partner’s basic needs. Food, water, sleep, etc. His cure for tears is ignoring them in favor of handing over some of his Aqua Cola with a gruff reminder not to waste fluids. Emotional sensitivity is far from a strong suit of his, but with the right character development it’s always possible for him to learn. 

He will know when his partner is moving slower than they should be, and he will set about to fix that. He will force his partners down for a mid-day nap if they haven’t been sleeping as much as they should. Also, he’s warm so he’s like an electric blanket that can crush them while they sleep (not that Nux ever had a problem with being too cold at night). He’ll complain about the sound their stomach makes when it growls while shoving food into their hands. He’ll trick them into taking a break when they’ve been working too hard by distracting them with stupid things like goading the Pups into playing with them or dropping a live lizard on their head, dumb things to make them laugh even when they’re swatting him for being a dick.

Often, his acts of care are done under the guise of annoying his partners. He’s not soft, he’s definitely not soft so don’t you dare call him soft, he’s Not. Soft. Buuuuuut—when there are no prying eyes—he might indulge his partner in a bit of softness… Let them take up space for a change… Let them do some of the touching the way they like to do it, if that’s what they want… He just couldn’t be bothered to kick their ass for it, it’s not that he likes it or anything.

In conclusion: a romantic relationship with Slit is rife with difficulties, it takes a fair bit of patience to deal with Slit’s antics. Being familiar with Slit requires you to be familiar bruises, and have a tolerance of being manhandled. Fights might happen, feelings may be hurt, and Slit will be Slit.

Disclaimer: Pros and Cons of Slit may very, or be completely different depending on character development and personal preferences, but I love all of them.

[mynameismilkthemusclegirl]

Guys

I just realized that Furosia would of had to somehow become a warboy and work her way up when she was younger. Now all I'm imagining is a young Furosia trying to prove herself capable of being a war boy after she crawled her way up the citadel from being a wretched or something. (Would explain why she wasn't really considered for breeding?)) Imagine a one armed Furosia fighting like a wild dog in the fighting pits or something.

[scuttleboat]

Headcanon for Mad Max: Fury Road

Toast the Knowing ends up as the matriarch of the Citadel, with all the other women as her advisers. Furiosa is the war leader and defender, the eternal hero. The Dag is the keeper of seeds and in charge of growing things, Cheedo negotiates with other cities, learns how to make peace instead of war. Capable is responsible for education and human development and seeing that people get what they need.  Basically it’s awesome.

[ayalaatreides]

Post-Fury Road, I really love the idea of War Boys being slightly afraid and completely awed by The Dag. Because she’s fierce as fuck and takes no shit but does no harm. She will fight your ass if she has to but she’s anti-violence as a whole (“And here I somehow thought you’d be above all that” to the Keeper of the Seeds). She is the new Keeper of the Seeds, bringer of life and green, but she will also fuck your shit up if necessary. It would blow their minds and put them off balance and mess with their view of the world, and I think they would adore and respect her for it.

Also, Nux makes an offhand mention of that time when she bit him-- “She bit ya?!” “Haha, yeah mate, sank ‘er teeth right in ‘ere. *taps shoulder* Nearly got some blood!” -- and they just cannot cope.