#mats looks at him appreciatively but he keeps watching seb with this small smile

[rosyjuly]

fully support the KM organizers decision to temporarily freeze new prompts for a week but you all better believe i'm prompting mats/mick/seb the moment prompts open

[kellykadesperate]

make a wish and celebrate

As if I could not write a drabble for my idiot’s birthday. Go crazy:

There's a gentleness about the way the world works at three in the morning, things are quieter and soft in a way that makes Robert grateful. He blinks his eyes open softly against the darkness of the room, rubs his hands over his eyes a little and looks at the clock.

The time shocks him a little, he wasn't sure how late it was and so he decides to just creep back under the sheets and pretend like he hasn't woken himself up a little in hope of getting some work done. It's too late for that now.

He moves Aaron's arm up a little, attempts to be careful and then he feels the younger man groan a little before his eyes widen and he drags Robert closer towards him. "What's the time?" He asks through a mumbled face down on the pillow.

Robert can't bring himself to look at the clock to check again so shrugs out, "About three." He whispers, and Aaron turns to face him suddenly with this sleepy smile on his face.

"Happy birthday." Aaron says, eyes still closed as he speaks and Robert laughs a little breathlessly because he doesn't really care all that much about it anyway. He's just another year older and although Vic wants to do something for him in the pub, Liv's not here and it doesn't get to feel the same. He kisses Aaron all the same though, at first it's chaste and then Aaron tugs at Robert's shirt and drags him down like he wants more.

"Shouldn't I be the one demanding kisses?" Robert mumbles against Aaron's flushed face, kisses at his neck a little before feeling Aaron pull a hand through his hair. "I am the birthday boy."

Aaron gives him this soft smile and wraps an arm around Robert's waist, draws small circles into the left side and then nods. "Yes you are, you can demand anything you like when the sun's up." He says, because he'd love to shag the life of his brilliant, good looking bastard of a husband but Seb got down way too late to allow any fumbling at 3 am.

"Anything?" Robert teases, eyes filled with an intensity that Aaron almost cannot ignore. It's why he slides a hand up through Robert's shirt and it makes the older man catch his breath suddenly.

"Within reason." Aaron says because he's Aaron and Robert rolls his eyes. "Happy birthday." He whispers again, gentle and in love and Robert already knows the day is going to go better than he ever planned.

~*~

The sun spills into the room and Robert feels it warm against his skin and thinks about the fact that they've been blessed with good weather.

He's also reminded of the fact that Aaron has banned him from talking about global warming because apparently when Robert is stripping as soon as he gets home because of the heat and the effects of global warming, it's a massive turn off.

Robert squints against it and then suddenly feels Aaron's mouth on his neck, kissing and kissing and counting and Robert's noes scrunches up a little before he's smiling. He remembers this last year, thirty one kisses. He also remembers thinking that he'd never have it this year or the next or the next, just never again.

Aaron finally finishes his sappy ritual that he tells himself is not at all soppy but actually just sexy. "And, thirty two." He says, with a smile on his face. He's basically straddling Robert and he stares down at the beauty of the man who doesn't look a day over twenty with his hair flat against his forehead and his freckles shimmering in the sunshine. He looks so beautiful that it makes Aaron almost have to catch his breath. But he's not that much of a sop.

"That was enjoyable." Robert mumbles, eyes soft around the way Aaron looks at him. He suddenly strokes over Aaron's arms and it makes the younger man smile even wider and dive down towards him.

"Happy birthday you." Aaron whispers and Robert kisses him passionately, almost pounces on the feel of Aaron being his again and it's fucking ridiculous considering they've been so perfect lately and he really should get over the fact that they ever weren't but -

He'll never ever take something as amazing as Aaron waking up with kisses on his birthday, for granted. He just won't.

"Rob," Aaron laughs out as Robert keeps kissing him and won't let him go. "I'm trying to be romantic and make you breakfast downstairs you dick." He pokes out and Robert gasps a little before smiling.

"Stay here." Robert whines, "Breakfast can wait -"

Aaron raises an eyebrow. "Oh and you're dick can't?" He says, and Robert smirks before pressing his body towards Aaron and smiling.

"Stop trying to be romantic and just come here." Robert demands softly and Aaron obliges and -

He's starting to really feel like the birthday boy.

::

He's got a flipping card from Chas and Paddy when he finally manages to get down the stairs and something almost flips in his stomach as he sees what they've written.

It's not that much and Paddy's only written his name at the end but Robert will take the sentiment of them wishing him a good day. He remembers times when they didn't wish for him to have a good flipping life so every little thing means it lot. Well it should anyway.

Aaron's busying himself in the kitchen when Robert looks through his cards and then spots when it awfully childish handwriting. He frowns against it and then almost on cue Seb starts losing his mind so Aaron runs up to get him.

Robert opens the card and stares at the front of it until Aaron's on the stairs with Seb on his hip looking all cautious.

"Bit daft but I thought you'd like it." Aaron whispers as he approaches Seb who of course stopped whinging as soon as Aaron held him and stroked his hair.

The card says, 'Happy Birthday Daddy' and his soft absolute sap of a husband has actually gone to the effort of writing even worse to try to be like Seb. It's beautiful and endearing and Robert literally nearly cries.

There's tears in his eyes a little and Aaron strokes his hair a little. "Take it you did then?" He whispers and Robert nods his head slowly. "Good." He says and then Robert is kissing the life out of him in their kitchen in only his boxers and he's deliriously happy about everything until Seb slaps his face and demands attention.

"Oi, it's your daddy's birthday. No hitting until 'at least midday." Aaron coos over Seb in a way that makes Robert's legs turn to jelly before he's poking at Aaron's stomach and smiling at the way he looks at him. "So..." Aaron says once Seb is rolling about on his play mat in the living room and shouting about something to himself. "Vic's coming soon to grab Seb and then - we're going out."

Robert scoffs a little, a frown on his face. "You booked somewhere?" He says and somehow Aaron and fancy restaurants doesn't seem to link, Aaron cooking him a meal though seems even weirder though so Robert has no idea what he's up to.

Aaron suddenly turns bright red and goes all insecure suddenly. "Well no, I mean we can hardly afford it but -" his almost flipping cringes. "Shit, I bet it's going to look ridiculous now but -" Robert stands and kisses him gently.

"I can't wait Mr Sugden." Robert shrugs his shoulders and it's been a while since they've been this relaxed and soft around each other. The past few days have been tense and upsetting and challenged them in a way that Robert wasn't ready for but being like this still happens, and Robert is still so grateful that it almost aches.

::

The massive surprise is a day out in the fields and Aaron literally bangs on about how fucking stupid it is all the way to the spot where they last had their picnic.

He remembers then, being happy and light and the only focus being on just how blue Aaron's eyes are and how brilliantly brave he was. The sun is still out and Robert has also been teased the whole way about how much of a dad he looks in his sunglasses.

He doesn't quite get the link but Jimmy agreed with Aaron when he saw them so apparently it's divine law or something. Robert can hear Aaron still yapping about how shit everything is when he finally opens his eyes and is allowed to actually look at Aaron's fine work.

There's a blanket laid out on the field and a proper posh hamper with absolutely everything Aaron promised he'd never ever buy because it's fucking extortionate apparently. But he's gone to the effort hasn't he? All wild salmon and sour cream and cress.

It isn't much but somehow it manages to tug straight at Robert's heart in this beautiful way and Aaron has nothing to worry about at all.

"I bought your laptop as well, some films for us to watch whilst it's nice out." Aaron shakes a hand through his hair and bites his lip as Robert stares around at the place. "It's not -"

"It's amazing, you idiot." Robert blurts out and suddenly it's like he's back to when they were this secret. It's like, them having the responsibility of a baby and Liv somehow makes times like this so much more enjoyable and soft and theirs to relish in. He feels like he did when he got to spend hours at Home Farm in his pants eating cold pizza and playing video games with Aaron and no amount of years will make that memory fade.

"Yeah?" Aaron says, all unsure and soft and Robert nods. "That's a relief." He mumbles gently and Robert comes towards him, all delicate and appreciative and Aaron smiles. "Just wanted you to have something good." He says, rubs at Robert's arm and then pulls them down on the blanket.

"Well this is good. Why am I sending that you're trying to make up for something here?" Robert scoots closer to Aaron and stretches his long dangly legs out so that Aaron sit in between them and look straight at him.

The question makes Aaron blush, head drop and shoulders rise and fall suddenly. "You've been amazing these past few days and - I don't know how I would have coped without you here." Because he had to cope without Robert when Liv was being called a skank and kissing Gabby and that hurt. He knows what it's like and he never wants to go through that again. "It's been a bit rubbish lately, I know that." He squints against he sun and then shakes off his ridiculous insecurity before opening up the hamper wider and watching Robert lose his whole mind over jam.

"Where'd you get -"

Aaron sighs. "I placed an order with that posh farmer's shop that you always look at when we're in town." He was so mortified that he had to do it over the phone and pick it up with sunglasses on like a dick. He smiles as he watches Robert pick up some marmalade or whatever and then his husband's face is falling a little.

It's like Robert is eight again and his mum's in the kitchen making him breakfast. He can almost still remember the absolute sweetness of the air and it clutches at his heart and won't let go. "Mum used to buy this exact one." He waves it up in the air a little and then strokes over the writing. "Thought it was so expensive when I was younger." He chuckles a little and then feels Aaron place a hand on his thigh. "I'm not upset. I'm - it's nice." He says and then he leans over and kisses Aaron quickly.

"I'm glad." Aaron says thickly, because in that moment, Robert looked so vulnerable as he thought back and Aaron just wanted to hold him forever. "Let's eat then birthday boy." He says and it doesn't take long for Aaron to get through most of everything.

Only he's refusing to eat olives and the beers he has are slowly dwindling down so he has to make do with drinking wine from the bottle.

"Dead classy that." Robert says, relaxed against the sun and the way Aaron is a fucking idiot sometimes. Aaron turns to look at him and smiles smugly.

"It's why you married me mate." Aaron says and Robert rolls his eyes before attempting to reach out for the bottle. "Wait your turn," Aaron chastises him and that only starts some ridiculous year four style brawl across the grass and Aaron is breathless against it as Robert pins him down against the blanket.

"It's my birthday." Robert says and Aaron rolls his eyes and pulls at Robert's shirt before his smacking their faces together and kissing him hard and fast over and over again. Because it's his birthday so he deserves all of this, well he does anyway, but it's not been great recently and Aaron wants him to know how much being like this is still one of his favourite things in the world.

"Love you." Robert catches his breath as he rolls off Aaron and holds his hand, they're tangled against the blanket and half the food has gone now and he just loves Aaron.

For this, for taking some sort of time out to come down and set everything up and order food and go the trouble of actually getting a blanket for them.

For being a thoughtful husband and knowing that despite what Diane and Chas said, he didn't want some big lunch or anything like that. He wanted Aaron and Aaron and Aaron and a soft sort of day where everything doesn't feel heavy or dramatic. And Aaron's given him just that.

Aaron turns towards him and nods. "I know you do." He says, body tingling against the way he catches Robert looking at him at the oddest times. He looks like if he took a photo of some moments and carried it around with him, he'd be able to show anyone that love exists and is so clear to see. He remembers thinking fucking sappy stuff like that on the night of their wedding, photos scattered around him and desperate to remember the exact look on Robert's face in all of them before he was behind bars and they couldn't show anyone. "And I love you, so much." He says, runs a hand through Robert's hair and kisses him. "And this." He says.

Robert blinks a little quickly. "Thought I was getting boring?" Because Liv had said it and Aaron had fucking laughed like the twat he is and Robert is not boring. Aaron slaps his chest and laughs a little before shaking his head.

"You are not boring." Aaron says, "You're just domesticated." He shrugs, "Never thought I'd be saying that about you. Robert Sugden, domesticated with me." He bites his lip against it and then his eyes grow heavy with how much all of this means to him.

"Me either." Robert mumbles, "A few months ago, I was destined to spend the day with Seb and Vic." He says. "When all I would have wanted was you." Because it's his birthday and he knows that things have gone so quickly and they're so settled now but he cannot help but think about how different it would have been if Aaron hadn't given him a chance.

"Well you've got me." Aaron says. "Oi, birthday boy, you have me now and next year and the next year and -" Robert covers Aaron's mouth with his hand and then his mouth.

"Forever then?" Robert mumbles, against Aaron's stubble. Aaron nods a little and then blushes as he holds Robert's hand.

"I can take you on a cruise for your next birthday." And there's a giant fucking dig there that makes Robert poke at Aaron suddenly and he starts laughing.

"I'm not *that old you idiot." Robert says, "Soon, you'll be catching up to me and there won't even be a difference." Aaron scoffs a little.

"Whatever you say birthday boy." Aaron mumbles, soft hands stroking Robert's chest.

"I say," he looks around the field and then at the portacabin and grins. "You up for it?"

And as Aaron drags him into the cramped shed of a place and starts stripping Robert, he's definitely still the birthday boy.

::

Aaron looks ridiculously and rather embarrassingly proud when Diane grabs ahold of Robert and kisses his cheek and Victoria makes the most out of being able to poke fun out of her brother for getting so old.

"Poor Aaron having to walk around with an OAP." Vic laughs and Robert just raises an eyebrow and sighs.

Aaron comes over to join them, draining his pint and rubbing a hand over Robert's shoulder lovingly. "Nah, he's still pretty fit." He says, and there's a warmness about him, fuzziness in his heart and it's because he drank wine from a flipping bottle.

"Thanks." Robert says delicately, finds Aaron's hand in his under the table and Vic smiles at them.

"God you're so flipping soppy." Vic says, still smiling and Robert looks at the way Seb is waving his arms around and trying to get to Robert. Aaron takes him though, all comical and happy and with this massive grin on his face.

"I'll take him, you've got a call coming in any second now." Aaron says, Seb hitting his face and playing with his beard all excitedly.

Robert frowns against his words and then suddenly there's an unknown number ringing him in. It takes him a second to properly understand but when he does he suddenly answers.

"Hello?" He says softly and it's Liv's voice at the end of the line. She says hello back and there's something kind about the way she speaks to him.

"They let me ring early, I said I had to wish my sort of brother happy birthday." Liv says, and Robert gulps hard and watches as Aaron smiles at him. "Happy birthday then." She says and Robert walks towards the back room for a little more quiet.

"Thanks. How are you doing?" Because that's all he wants to know, he couldn't really give a ross about his birthday when it's compared to how Liv is doing behind bars.

"It's not about me today, for once. But I'm okay, got my head in a few books because there's nothing else to do here."

And Robert smiles against that, he smiles against the fact that his little sister is going to do brilliant and she can shove her GCSE results right in that judge's 'no future' shit she politely sprouted. "I'm so glad." He says, and then suddenly there's just this quietens between them.

"Good. I - I just wanted to make sure you were having an alright day. I suppose Aaron hadn't put his finger out on a fancy restaurant."

And she laughs as soon as Robert mentions the picnic. It's a sound he's missed so much and it's not even been a week yet but he wants a card from her that only says her name and a single 'x'

"I miss you." Robert says suddenly. "We all do." He whispers, and he's not going to get choked up but he's older now and this is just another year where he gets to say that he has a family.

"I miss you too." Liv admits, "Just look out for Aaron for me." And he still just wants to hug her. "And Seb."

And that make his chin wobble a little and he blows out a breath. "Love you Liv." He says, hears the sound of girls giggling as they pass by and he freezes a little as she clearly waits for them to pass.

"Love you too, happy birthday old man."

With that, she hangs open and Robert suddenly has something in his eyes. Aaron comes in with Seb gurgling about a little and he's clearly obsessed with Aaron's beard nowadays.

"She wanted to surprise ya." Aaron says, balances Seb and then holds a hand up towards Robert's shoulder and squeezes hard. "How did she sound?"

"Brave. Just like you did." Robert says softly, looks up at Aaron. "I love you." He says, and Aaron frowns a little before nodding and kissing him gently. "Can't wait till we're all together again." He says softly against Aaron's neck and the way Seb bobs his head around with joy.

"Me either." Aaron sniffs past his emotions and smiles. "But let's not that think about that now. It's your birthday you twat." He keeps reminding Robert and feels like shit for taking anything away from his special day. But then Robert reminds him that he's not ten and Aaron stops. "Come back inside." He says.

Robert nods and Aaron grabs his hand and leads him back out into the pub. When he's standing on the other side of the bar, the lights suddenly dim and -

Vic carries out a cake for him, everyone's singing and laughing and Robert can actually hear the Dingle's wishing him a happy birthday and it feels surreal. When it comes round to the whole making a wish thing, he looks straight at Aaron and the way he bounces Seb and points towards the cake and all he wishes is that he gets to keep them forever.

He wishes that Liv is in between them and the room is brighter and it never ever fades away.

Everyone claps and cheers and Robert sees his name written on the cake, Marlon too smug that he had to help Vic with the icing of it. Somehow Robert's birthday cake became a project and he blushes under the argument taking place between the pair before he looks at Aaron and catches his breath.

He's just being himself, pacing the room a little and trying to keep Seb happy because he's getting a little overwhelmed with all the faces telling him he's adorable. And Aaron's not wearing anything special but is special isn't he? Just standing there with his hair all soft and curled and looking like a fucking dream.

And then he goes and waves at Robert just as Cain offers him to buy him a pint, mouths out 'I love you' like he doesn't care who sees and then 'happy birthday' and Robert isn't sure how he hasn't turned into a pile of goo on the floor.

::

Robert's eaten too much cake to move off from the sofa and put a sleeping Seb in his crib so he just watches him with a smile on his face until he hears Aaron coming down the stairs.

He's in a suit for absolutely no reason because it's nearly half seven and they're clearly not going anyway.

"What's all this for then?" Robert mumbles, his stomach in knots as he sees how beautiful Aaron looks. He imagines Aaron like this in his dreams and it's too embarrassing to admit to how much it makes his whole body flip.

Aaron has a blue balloon behind his back and smiles before pulling it in front of him and shrugging. "You do prefer me in a suit." And he'll only go to the effort of digging out his blue suit for Robert only once a flipping year. Or maybe more than that. Aaron Dingle is fully aware that he can be a thoughtful soft sap when it comes to his family and especially when it comes to the bloke who he's in love with.

Robert's mouth is a little dry and he has to gulp hard. "I prefer you naked." He says, only Aaron scoffs and points to Seb.

"Not in front of the little one." And Robert adores when he calls Seb that. It literally makes his heart melt and everything feel fuzzy. "It's sort of a present for you." He waves a hand out over himself smugly and then places the ballon closer to Robert before bending down and getting out a packaged parcel and handing it over.

They're almost synchronised in the way that he passes the present and Robert passed him a sleeping Seb and it all goes fine before the little boy is crying and demanding to be held over Aaron's shoulder.

Robert struggles with Aaron's awful attempt at wrapping and then opens up the present to reveal what's inside. At first he isn't too sure and Aaron holds his breath as he watches him. There's a small car inside, some old vintage one that Robert is obsessed with. He smiles down at it and then hears the sound of an envelope being put on the table. As he opens it Aaron suddenly can't contain himself.

"I haven't bought you a car." He blurts out. "But it's - like some day where you can go and race all the old ones. Try it out. I don't know - maybe when we're millionaires I could track one down for you." He's clearly all nervous but he doesn't have to be because Robert is so touched.

"It's amazing." Robert says, like he's flipping five. "I've always wanted to - wait how did you -"

"I'd like to think I know you." Aaron shrugs, bends down a little and Robert takes the opportunity to kiss the life out of him. Aaron's lips are almost bruised by the time Seb decides that he really needs to be put to bed and Aaron's going up with him.

Robert's caught up in the softness of the present and the fact that Aaron managed to deliver it with a suit on just because. The car looks pretty expensive, one of those collectible items that Aaron turns his nose up at but apparently that doesn't matter when it comes to Robert.

The thought makes him feel so suddenly overwhelmed and then he spots Aaron's card. The only one he hasn't opened yet.

It's a typical one really and him and Liv are almost the same person sometimes.

He's written 'Dear Robert' like normal and then he's gone and tugged straight at Robert's heart with his words.

He's all 'You deserve have the best day, and I hope you do' and 'I love you so much' and then he signs it with 'All the love in the world, Mr Sugden' and Robert can't help but think about the fact that he'll keep it forever.

::

Robert won't stop googling this flipping vintage car track thingy and Aaron's almost regretting his kind gesture. Almost.

They're in bed now and they've already stuffed themselves with Chinese and somehow managed to enjoy two rounds of birthday sex before Robert almost passed out and Aaron had to slap his cheeks a little with a concerned look on his face before he smiled.

Now, Robert's glued to his phone and Aaron's a needy bastard who lines up Robert's freckles with his finger and kisses at his shoulder. "I get it. You like the present." He says, and he can hear the way Robert is still flipping panting.

It's almost hilarious and when he drops his phone down on the side and looks at Aaron, he's almost still blissfully dazed like he was a few minutes ago.

"I like you more." Robert says, and apparently having wine with a Chinese just like Aaron said, wasn't a good idea. He's sloppy with how much love he shows Aaron and kisses him on the neck as the younger man wriggles away a little and laughs.

"You had a good day then?" Aaron whispers, combs through Robert's hair the way his knows his husband like it and then kisses his head when he feels him nod.

"Almost doesn't feel real." Robert admits, because Aaron's probably said happy birthday to him about thirty times today and he had a small little celebration in the pub and a handmade cake and -

"What? Being another year older than me?" Aaron tries to poke but then Robert's looking up at him all sincerely.

"Having you back." Robert whispers and Aaron goes to say something but he places a hand down on his chest. "I never thought I'd have you here, have your mum and Paddy singing me happy birthday. Because of all those things I did and -"

"If you tell me you don't deserve a day like today then -"

"Sometimes I feel like I don't." Robert has his head dropped a little and Aaron raises him gently.

"That's why I'm here to tell ya." Aaron says to him. "You deserve this, me putting on a suit for you and you getting to take it off." He smirks it a little and Robert warms. "I know what you mean though, there was a time I didn't think I'd get to treat you on your birthday ever again and it hurt." His chin threatens to wobble, only Robert rubs at his cheek and he smiles instead. "But look at us eh?"

Robert looks down at the way their hands are locked together and Aaron shudders a little like he's preparing to say something soft.

And oh, he delivers.

"I promise to keep being this - this soppy and stupid on your birthday every single year okay? Forever." Aaron whispers, eyes almost watering because he wants Robert to know how much he absolutely adores him and how much today has meant to him too. "Because I love you so so much."

Robert suddenly kisses him, pulls a hand around the back of Aaron's neck and smiles at the way Aaron kisses him back with just as much heat. It's beautiful, and soft and it's nearly not his birthday but who the fuck cares about time when Aaron's promising to be like this for the rest of his life.

It's almost overwhelming and he cannot think of anything other than the fact that he's so lucky to have this little life of his, in spite of all the bad. He almost gets emotional against it and then Aaron is moving away and diving down towards the bedside table.

"One last thing." Aaron passes over a small box and if Robert wasn't already wearing a ring he'd lose his shit. Aaron brings the sheets up over his naked body and shivers a little as he waits for Robert to open it.

And when he does, Aaron suddenly smirks and can't stop smirking. Robert, on the other hand, is completely flawed by the fact that his long lost watch is in a new velvet lined box.

"I lost this." Robert frowns as he brings it out of the cushion and holds up against the fading light of the moon. "Ages ago. Remember I asked you if -"

Aaron pulls a face, soft and warm and childish.

"You found it and didn't tell me?"

Only,

"It was never lost. I just wanted to keep something of yours." Aaron shrugs, like it's no big deal or anything like that but Robert's heart swoons.

He suddenly pulls Aaron closer to him and kisses him gently on the mouth before gazing at his blue eyes. "You, Aaron Dingle, are an absolute softy."

And Aaron will take that, here, in their bed, naked and spent and just happy. If Robert goes around saying anything to anyone then that will be a different story.

"Only for you so don't go around telling people I hoarded my then exes watch for months and months before giving it back to him as a birthday present." Because it sounds flipping weird but Robert is given him heart eyes like he thinks it's the best thing in the world and that's all that seems to matter really.

Robert kisses him again and then slides down beside him, hugs at Aaron's frame and sighs contently.

"Had a good day." Robert says through a yawn. "'Cause of you." He whispers. "Always - always 'cause of you." And Aaron's heart swoons in this embarrassing way before he squeezes Robert's hand.

"Good. Happy birthday." Aaron mumbles back, strokes Robert's hand now and then sighs. "Love you."

And Robert kisses Aaron's hand, yawns again. "Love you too." He mumbles, with an absolute softness about him that makes him feel like he's ten years old who's had all his jelly and ice cream and the best present in the world.

It makes something flip in his head just as he closes his eyes and dreams about having days like this year after year after year.

[luninosity]

One more thank-you short fic, for @whowaswillbe, who requested “ yoga seb, I'd love to see it being before they get together -- Chris being completely transfixed by this gorgeous creature (and who could blame him?)”. I don’t really know *that* much about yoga, but they are both (relative) beginners here in any case, so...have some first-meeting Evanstan fluff!

##

Chris should be good at yoga. In theory. Given his flexibility.

 He wobbles. Trying to do something called mountain pose. He’s not a good mountain. Or whatever.

 He’s done gymnastics and ballet and improv theater classes. He knows how to move. Or he’s always more or less thought so.

 He’s aware that this is not enough.

 He’s also aware that at least half his problem, if not more, involves the utterly beautiful man just in front and slightly to the right of him. The man has duckling-soft brown hair, infinite legs, and an ass that exists in a state of loveliness which cannot be defined by words.

 He wobbles again. They change poses—the instructor’s nice but relentless, making them keep up, though with consideration for everyone’s introductory level of skill—and get into something called downward dog, which makes Chris think about his own dog and Dodger trying to climb all over him when he’d been doing push-ups a few days ago, and then he wonders if the beautiful man in front of him likes dogs, and if so whether he’d like Chris’s dog specifically, and Chris’s house, and—

 This is almost certainly not a calm and flowing state of mind.

 The beautiful man moves much more easily than Chris; they’re both here in this beginning class, but he’s clearly been coming longer. He knows someone else in the class, and that person knows the instructor; Chris had seen them come in, laughing, teasing each other. He’s got the vague impression that they’re gym buddies who drop into a friend’s session occasionally for some balancing-out of workouts: a need for a type of practice that’s soothing, meditative, revitalizing. The friend’s a personal trainer or something; Chris has seen him around the gym.

 Chris himself is here because he’d thought it might be a helpful idea. His anxiety’s been acting up a bit—first big political initiatives, first year as a congressman, first year trying his hardest to go from being a moderately successful actor-director to a steward of the future. He thinks he’s doing okay sometimes, but then sometimes he panics about his own inexperience and critical comments, which fortunately haven’t been that critical. Mostly the commentators and pundits’re waiting to see how he does with this arts funding program, he guesses.

 He’d thought yoga might soothe jangled nerves. Might get him out of his head and into his body: relaxed but focused, present and grounded.

 He’d been half right. He’s certainly focused on someone’s body.

 They do a few more poses. Bending, stretching. He gets into a kind of rhythm. Good if unfamiliar working of muscles. Contemplation of breath and movement. Occasional glances at the living artwork practicing an inverted pose in front of him. Chris’s brain becomes stuck on that sight, and even though he normally can do a near-flawless handstand—thank you, gymnastics—his mind and desires and instant arousal all collude and collide to make him flop over into an ungainly heap.

 The beautiful man actually turns around. Grey eyes. Grey-blue, like opals, like precious stones framed by tiny laughter-lines and delicious cheekbones. Chris Evans, who hasn’t drawn much lately—no time, no inspiration, too drained at the ends of long meetings—wants to put pencil to paper. Instead he sprawls there on his mat and cannot think of a single thing to say.

 The man smiles at him, not without concern, probably because Chris is still lying in place in an unimpressive pile of limbs.

 Their instructor arrives to help. Chris sighs and pays attention and then applies his skill and kicks his way into a wonderful, stunning, effortless, hopefully dazzling handstand.

 He’s facing the wrong way. He can’t tell whether those jewelry-box eyes are even seeing him.

 They flop down into a closing meditation pose, lying on the floor. The air tastes faintly of spice and afternoon warmth; the music’s not something he knows, but it’s tranquil now. The floor’s hard under his mat, but in a good way: he feels good, he realizes slowly.

 With or without those pretty eyes watching him: he does feel good.

 He’s gotten out of the office. He’s spent an hour not worrying about his political inadequacies or self-doubt. He’s pushed himself to try something new, and his body’s humming in a satisfied kind of way. And he’s seen a lovely person, and that’s a sort of appreciation without pressure: like gazing at a painting, reading a certain line of a poem, knowing the world’s better for that extra bit of beauty in it.

 Of course he’s telling himself that. He does mean it. But he would also like to get to know that particular bit of beauty. Someone who turned around to help him, who smiled at him after clumsiness.

 He opens his eyes and sits up. The class is ending; everyone gathers up things, pauses to chat, mills around. The pretty-eyed man and his personal trainer friend are talking to the instructor. Not looking his way.

 Chris gives a small wistful mental shrug, and takes a step toward the door and his life.

 “Hey.” A footfall, a breathless syllable. Chris turns. Those eyes. Right there. “Hi,” the man says, now blushing a little for no discernable reason. He’s even more adorable up close: somehow shy and sweet and brave simultaneously.

 Chris likes shy and sweet and brave.

 “You, um, you’re actually good at handstands?” the man tries, in a tone that’s already biting its lip at its own awkward determination. “I mean, I saw you—I mean I wouldn’t’ve guessed that you—oh fuck I didn’t mean it like that, just because you’re a politician, I’m sure you can do a lot of physical flexible things too—I did not mean that the way it sounded, I’m so sorry. I just. I don’t know. I wanted to. Say hi.”

 “Hi,” Chris says dazedly. Gorgeous, tripping over words, worried about insulting him, and capable of hearing his own innuendo. Amazing. Wonderful head to toe. “You, um, you know who I am?”

 “I’ve followed your career for ages. As an actor, when you started directing—I love Before We Go, it’s so poignant—and when you started getting more political…” The man’s cheeks are pink but he’s holding Chris’s gaze, not ducking away. “I’m Sebastian. I’m trying not to be weird, I swear. Only I’m a writer so it’s kind of a job description. Being weird. Oh god, sorry again, what are words.”

 “Sebastian,” Chris repeats, an echo because he can barely think of anything else. Only Sebastian. He offers his hand. Sebastian takes it.

 Their fingers meet, in a sunlit yoga studio, surrounded by ebbing students and buoyant exertion.

 “You’re a writer?” Sebastian’s hand’s warm. Long fingers. Graceful in a baby-colt way, matching the endless legs, the exuberant hair. Neither of them has let go. “What do you write?”

 “Um.” Sebastian looks at their hands. This is no longer a handshake by any reasonable definition. Chris has unconsciously begun rubbing a thumb over that soft skin: exploring, gentling, instinctively being an anchor for babbling words. They both seem fine with this. “Technically I’m a professor? Rutgers. Creative writing. But I’m on sabbatical. Working on the next novel. Or completely failing to work on the next novel. I thought yoga might help. It’s about Mars. Science fiction.”

 Sebastian’s some sort of genius novel-writing prodigy of a professor, Chris concludes. Nothing short of a phenomenon. Extraordinary beauty, kindness, intellect, and breathtakingly earnest acquiescence to care. “What do you think about the, um, seven new exoplanets and the possibility of actual water and ocean life?”

 Sebastian’s eyes light up.

 Chris grins. “Same.”

 “Would you…” Sebastian takes a deep breath, glances at their hands again, and goes with, in a nervous endearing rush, “…want to grab Starbucks and talk about, um, handstand technique and space oceans with me?”

 “Sebastian,” Chris says very gravely, answering the sparkle in that joyous grey-blue gaze, “I would absolutely love to buy you Starbucks and talk about handstands and yoga and terraforming and space oceans,” which is true, true like a blinding rush of light, like the first glimpse of the rest of his life, like Sebastian’s smile.