#memory loss gabriel is kinda baby there i said it

[heartxout]

gabriel: hey crowley, what’s your number

crowley, visibly texting: i don’t have a phone

[impala-in-gotham]

This Destiel/finale fix-it ficlet I wrote...

This is my first attempt at writing fic so be gentle haha but I had a dream close to this and kinda tweaked it from there but it’s basically a finale fix-it in which I’ve decided Dean’s still alive. He lost consciousness a few sentences into his speech and imagined the rest, which is what we saw. There’s just too much about “heaven” that has been used before as a façade. So here goes…

“Okay. P-Please. I'm fading pretty quick, so...there's a few things that I-...” before he can even start the next words Dean’s head lolls to the side and his eyes fall closed.

Sam feels like everything is moving in slow motion as the nightmare of losing his brother plays out in front of his eyes.

“Dean??”

Sam holds Dean in place the best he can and his dread drains away slightly as he hears Dean’s shallow breaths despite his sudden loss of consciousness.

Sam's thoughts start racing, time-induced panic ticking away. Nothing they haven’t dealt with before but this isn’t Chuck’s tale of heroes anymore. It’s just them now.

"Shit, shit, shit...the nearest hospital is still too far...I can't...there's too many bodies to even try to explain...I can't even let Dean go to hide them...shit. Shit...Jack!"

"Hang on, Dean. Just hang on as long as you can. I'll fix this."

Sam prays loudly into the empty barn, "Jack?? Jack, I know you can see this, I hope you can do something, please. It can't end like this. It wasn't supposed to end like this. Not after everything we've been through, everything Dean's survived, he doesn't deserve this. You know he doesn't. Please, Jack. He's not gone yet, he can still be saved. I'm not asking for resurrection here, just...just heal him, please, he deserves to be saved."

As if on cue, the barn roof starts to rattle, a few bulbs burst overhead and Cas walks through the barn doors, rushing to their side while Sam's eyes widen in shock.

"Cas?!? but...", Sam stammers out with only a little bit of shock and a lot more relief.

Cas darts his eyes straight at him and it feels like he's looking straight at his soul.

"Sam, I need you to hold him steady, I'll start healing, but I need you to slowly pull him forward as I heal, alright?... Sam?!...Ok?!"

"Yeah...Yes...Ok, I'm ready.", Sam’s words stumble out as he refocuses onto Dean's weight in his arms.

The familiar golden glow pours from Cas steadier than it did the last time Sam watched him heal Dean's hand. So easily that Sam is holding all of Dean's weight mere seconds later. Cas helps him lay Dean down. Dean's breathing has evened out, but his face is still clammy and pale.

Cas holds Dean's head in his lap for a few moments, as he pulls off his trench coat and folds it up as a makeshift pillow, easing his head onto it. The care and intimacy of the moment, it feels like Sam needs to look away, but then Cas stands and looks up at the relief and tears on Sam's face.

"He'll be alright, Sam. He lost a fair amount of blood so he just nee-".

Sam practically slams his entire body into Cas as he crushes him into a hug, "Cas, I can't believe you're here. Of course, you're here. You saved him. You always save him. Thank you, Cas. I didn't know what to do. Jack said he'd be hands-off but it's Dean."

"Of course. Jack sent me as soon as he heard you. We’re lucky we made it in time.", Cas looks around at the lifeless bodies and their lost heads strewn about, "I'll help you clean this up but first, I'll get those boys home."

As Sam piles up the bodies a familiar but long since heard sound of wings flutter near Dean and Cas is back. He's looking down at Dean with such adoration but with his matter-of-fact tone states, "They're back with their mother, who was thankful to you both...and to have her tongue healed back. I took the liberty of altering their memories. They shouldn't have to live with that trauma." His eyes still lost to watching Dean’s chest rise and fall.

"You got your wings back," Sam says without realizing he thought it aloud.

Cas smiles coyly and looks back at Sam, visibly spreading them out, while Sam watches in awe as their shadows encompass the barn behind him. "Along with a few other powers I've missed now that Jack has restored heaven to what it should be."

Sam sighs, "Yeah, about that..."

While cleaning up the barn, Sam and Cas catch each other up on what happened since they last saw each other. Sam talks about defeating Chuck, Jack bringing everyone back, and how mundane the past months of freedom have been. Cas tells Sam how Jack rescued him from the Empty as well as other angels like Michael (with Adam), Gabriel, Hannah, Samandriel, and Balthazar to name a few.

Sam throws his lighter into the pile of vamps and looks over at Cas, "It's great to have you back, Cas. Dean didn't...well more like couldn't I guess. He couldn't talk about you much after... all he told us was you made a deal and you summoned the Empty to save him from Billie...but after that, he could barely say your name. Didn't stop him from asking Chuck to bring you back", he says with a small smirk, then presses his lips together and sighs, "but it was like a part of him had shut down or just broke. He wouldn't tell me and if you don't want to, I won't push it but you're my best friend, Cas and I...I still don’t know...Can you tell me what happened?"

Cas looks into Sam's puppy dog eyes, now glistening either from the fire or the topic, and then over at Dean still peacefully asleep a few feet away. He reaches out his grace and maybe Dean's soul recognizes it because he is sleeping soundly as if he hasn't in months. Cas guesses that's probably true. Contemplating how much of the story is his to tell and how much Dean would allow him to say since Sam and Cas both know it's not that he won't, he can't.

Cas reaches out and squeezes Sam's shoulder. "I'm sorry for any pain I caused you, I didn't have a choice. I knew it was the only way to beat Chuck. That only you and Dean could find a way. I made the deal to save Jack when he was dying, the Shadow agreed to take me instead but not until I had experienced true happiness. With Chuck in charge, any happiness seemed impossible, but I thought proving to Dean that he is worth saving, that all he's ever done was driven by love, not anger, prove to him why I love him." His voice betrays him by cracking on the last words. Still new to his mouth and his ears.

Cas searches Sam's face for any sort of shock or surprise but finds none. Instead, there’s a kind understanding that only Sam would have.

Sam sighs and says, "That's why." he continues as Cas' head tilts, "When we faced Chuck, he called Dean the ultimate killer but Dean just walked past him, no anger or malice, and just said 'that's not who I am'. It was because of you. He must have finally started to see himself the way you see him. How we all see him."

Cas brightens at that, looking back over at Dean, "Then it worked. The only thing I ever wanted was for Dean to love himself. I didn't ever think I'd be enough. That how I feel about him was enough after everything...after every time I tried to prove it. It was never enough before."

Sam smiles warmly, "You were enough, Cas. I've been trying almost our whole lives to get Dean to believe he wasn't a killer, that his life was worth more. I think we all tried, but you got through to him. He tried so hard after you...he tried but I could tell he was forcing it. Tonight, before you got here, it sounded like he'd given up. It sounded like the last time we lost you.” Sam shakes his head, trying to push away the image of Dean plunging a syringe into his heart, “Cas…every time we lost you it's been hard. For me too, but for Dean... it's different, each time it was different. He’d close himself off. He’d lose all faith. He’d give up. He’d want to die. I think...I think that he loves you more than he lets on. He's better when you're back. He's only happy when you're back."

Cas looks back over at Sam, a trace of a smile, "I know. I always felt it, just... well", he huffs, "We both know he's not one for words. But I know how he feels. I think his fear was more so in having something to lose. We’ve lost each other too many times."

The fire is dying down with the bodies not quite recognizable. Sam collects their gear into Baby's trunk. Cas walks out of the barn carrying Dean as if he's as light as a feather. Sam offers to drive Baby back to the bunker if Cas wants to fly Dean back instead. Cas nods and another flutter of wings echoes in the space left behind. Sam climbs into Baby, places his hands tightly on the wheel, closes his eyes, and prays to Jack.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours later, Dean wakes up. He slowly realizes he's back in the bunker, he's in his room, there's no pain in his back, and his hand is being held. He looks over to meet gleaming blue eyes he thought he’d never see again and can barely get anything out. “Cas... but how... you...?” and just pulls him into an awkwardly angled hug but holds on so tightly. It's just them. He doesn't have a time limit.

Dean feels as Cas inhales to explain but Dean cuts him off with “It doesn’t matter how. Is this real? Are you really back? For good."

Cas smiles as if his true happiness reaches a new level and simply says, “Hello, Dean." tightening his embrace, "Yes, Jack brought me back-- new and improved”.

Dean holds him and breathes in that familiar ozone smell, feels the pulse of grace within him stronger than before, something only he seems to be able to feel. "I thought I lost you forever. I thought you...wait," he pulls back to look at Cas again, "Didn't I die? I was in heaven, but it felt...wrong, you were there but you didn't come to see me, Bobby was there but he didn't even hug me after... what? 8 years?! No one else showed up. I just drove to a bridge…Tell me you didn't make a deal or -" his face freezes and his entire body goes tense, "Where's Sam?"

"No, you didn't die. Sam prayed to Jack and I came straight to you. You're healed but the blood loss left you pretty lethargic; though, I think that was your own exhaustion. Sam’s fine, he took the Impala. Should be here soon. You’re safe, it was just a dream. Those boys are back with their mother. I healed her. Altered their memories. Everyone's safe now. Sam told me everything that happened since...I...," a brief sadness flashes in his eyes before he brightens and smiles at Dean, "I knew you would save the world."

“I’ve been trying to find a way into the Empty for months, Cas. I…I read everything I could find but there was barely anything. I tried to use your blood from the sigil to summon you like what Nick tried to do but I guess I didn’t get the ingredients right or I don’t know…nothing worked. Jack never answered any of my prayers but I kept asking him to bring you back. I tried--…”

“Dean.” The tone over that one syllable calmed Dean the same way only Cas has always managed to be able to do.

Cas continued, “I’m back. Jack only recently was able to get me back but he heard your prayers. It took a lot of time and bargaining to get me and as many angels as we could save back out. The Shadow’s asleep again. I’m back and I’m not going anywhere. This is my home. I’m home.”

Dean sits processing this. Shaking off the fake heaven and submerging himself in Cas being alive and here. Now. In his grasp. He doesn't know how he gets to have a second...or seventh? chance but all that matters is everyone he loves, everyone he cares about is safe.

Dean meets Cas’s eyes and stares into the bright, deep blue he's fallen in love with so many times, eyes that have seen every part of who he is, good and bad, and says, “I love you too, Cas.”

Cas smiles very much like he did before the Empty was summoned but without tears because the one thing he wants is right in front of him. Looking at him like he is the most important being in every possible alternate universe. Still so beautiful.

Dean's eyes drift to Cas's lips as they have many times before, asking the same question Cas has yet to answer. Cas places a hand behind the base of Dean's neck, his fingers warm and strong as they pull Dean closer. Finally, their lips come together and it feels like no other kiss either of them has ever had. It feels like swirling grace entangling into his soul; it feels like being healed. It feels like every jagged piece of each other is clicking into place, completing and filling what was empty and longing before. It feels like being saved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sam parks in the garage and leaves everything as-is to deal with later. He heads down the hallway to check on Dean when suddenly the overhead lights flicker but before he can run for iron or salt, the bulbs burst. First the one over Dean's door, then a few more heading his direction, then nothing. Sam relaxes and sighs deeply, “Finally!”

[casualmultifandomshipper]

Good Omens fic Rec

(Remember to mind the tags on these in case there is something specific you’re trying to watch out for)

Must Love Earth by teaDragon:

“Adam reasons that if Heaven and Hell just got to know each other a bit better, they wouldn’t be so keen to start another Apocalypse. After all, both sides have a lot in common, even if they hate to admit it. To make his point, Adam has every angel and demon fill out compatibility quizzes and go on a date with whoever they get matched with (be it angel or demon). But not just once. Oh no. They have to do it Five times. Five different dates in five days. Naturally, Aziraphale and Crowley have to participate as well…”

(I recommend this fic every chance I get. I found it to be so sweet and fluffy. Plus, I loved the angels and demons the duo got to meet.)

There Is A Light And It Never Goes Out by t_mesinine:

(One of my fave Crowley Was Raphael fics. Definitely read if you’re into that headcanon, though beware its kinda angsty.)

Meeting The Parents by sparxwrites:

“Or, more accurately, meeting the gay angelic uncles. Castiel takes Dean to meet Aziraphale and Crowley for approval. In which Crowley is protective, Castiel is embarrassed, Aziraphale fusses and Dean learns some interesting things.”

(I sometimes don’t like crossover fics, but this one was an exception. Very cute fic.)

Of Raphael by CandyQueenAO3:

“Aziraphale and Crowley, returning from a post-Armageddon lunch at the Ritz, find the Archangel Raphael, missing for 11 years, standing in front of the bookshop.  Crowley is immediately wary, but when the lost Archangel and Aziraphale embrace like lovers reunited, Crowley begins to worry.What does, "Azi-Raphael" have to do with anything?“

(It’s an interesting take on Aziraphale’s name. This is a series full of mysteries, laughs, and keeps me interested in what’s going to happen next. Unfinished, but don’t let that stop you from reading!)

The Way You Did Once by Krasimer:

“Gabriel Falls. Heaven needs to pin the blame on someone, after all, and he is a convenient scapegoat. Had he succeeded in convincing the child, he would have been heralded as a hero in the war--But he didn't succeed. And now, he is Fallen.”

(I’m not normally a fan of memory loss fics, but this used the trope really well! This has good mystery elements to it. It has Ineffable Bureaucracy as one of the main pairings.)

My Big Fat Celestial Wedding by raiining:

“ “Well,” Gabriel says, “he might as well meet the whole family. “

(Oh. my. god. This fic was so funny and interesting. It had a little bit of worldbuilding on angel and demon culture.)

Quiet Reflection by shinyopals:

“After the Apocalypse, Crowley senses Demons coming, and manages to hide himself and Aziraphale inside a nearby church for safety. He probably should have thought this through. “

(A hilariously chaotic, but unfortunately short fic. I smiled and rolled my eyes at our fave duo throughout this.)

New Life by caricari:

“An angel and a demon go to visit with some old friends and meet a brand new one. Told from Adam's pov. Quite a lot of fluff, Crowley holding a baby, and some soft observations about the almost-antichrist's growing extended family.“

(It says fluff, but I found it bittersweet as well. Adam starts feeling the negative aspects of being immortal while friends, including Dog, get older.)

wherever you are, I’ll come to you by mutalune:

““Are you alright? What’s all this about then?” “Ah. Well. I might have slipped.” “Slipped?” “Took a bit of a tumble, I’m afraid,” Aziraphale said. “But, well. What’s done is done.” “What’s done - ?” “Now that I’m no longer beholden to a rather arbitrary moral code, I have to ask: Do you pay taxes? Actually, more importantly, do you think I can stop paying taxes now? That seems like a sufficiently demonic thing to do. Refusing to do my civic duty and whatnot. Quite devious, I’d argue.” This was, in hindsight, not the most sensitive way of breaking the news.

(Aziraphale had to choose between killing Crowley or Falling. Poor Crowley is hilariously awkward lol)

Little Talks by Icka M Chif (mischif):

“ Aziraphale paused, staring at where the plate of chocolates Beelzebub had taken, an odd thought running across his mind.Had he, an angel, just tempted a demon? The Prince of Hell, no less?“

(Blackmailing and confusing each other’s superiors. LOL)

That Time of the Semicentury by ZehWulf:

“What if we low-key compared the experience of snake-demon shedding to having a period and let the hurt/comfort unfold accordingly?”

(Period pain - Ugh! - am I right? Cute fic full of non-sexual intimacy)

In All Things, Balance by Kedreeva:

“The duo had assumed they had more than a little bit of time to relax before they had to start watching their backs again.”

(Lots of injury angst, but it’s worth enduring for the end. I won’t give away too much for this fic.)

[lolcat76]

i need, pretty please, from the bottom of my soul, some fic from the Brenda/Sharon Christmas ep. FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY SOUL.

Here you go, Anonymous Who Is Definitely Not Mia:

Despite the grim case and the cancelled plans, the Christmas dinner turned out to be a cheerful affair, which Sharon credited to Willie Rae’s liberal use of bourbon in the candied yams. And the apple pie. And the eggnog.

And, frankly, the flask that Clay was pouring thimblefuls into paper cups in the corner with Provenza and Pope, poorly shielded by a coat rack. Men. Honestly. Between her coworkers and the never-ending parade of Ricky’s high school friends in her living room, she was sick to death of men.

“Having fun?”

Well, not all men.

Andy Flynn hovered behind her, far enough to maintain plausible deniability, but close enough that his whispered breath sent a little shiver down her spine. Disappointed as she was about not spending Christmas with her parents and children, she wasn’t terribly upset about plan B, a night without interruptions with the man currently trying to twist his fingers in her hair.

“Stop it,” she said, brushing his hand away, but her words lacked their usual bite. After all, everyone except Fritz and Andy was three sheets to the wind – in a government building, no less, and she the ranking Professional Standards officer, good LORD, it was a good thing she was feeling festive and had better plans for the evening than writing disciplinary reports – and nobody seemed to give a damn what she was doing, or with whom she was doing it.

It was a little Christmas miracle.

“Tell you what,” he said, his voice low and smooth and his breath warm in her ear, “I’ll stop it here if you meet me at your place in half an hour so we can start it there.”

“Smooth,” she purred, and he laughed. “Go say your goodbyes and I’ll do the same.”

As Andy began his circuit, she made her way toward the break room to gather her purse and suitcase. A quick thank you and goodbye to Brenda’s parents, and she’d be on her way. Christmas would be saved after all.

“Oh, Sharon!” Willie Rae’s voice rose over the din of what sounded like an argument about collard greens between Buzz and Sanchez, and Sharon heaved a sigh. It was almost as if this Christmas had it in for her. She was going to have to go to an extra confession or two if this kept up. But first she was going to have to gracefully dodge her hosts so that she could get home and do some sinning worthy of a confession. She shrugged into her jacket, hoping to politely convey that she needed to be somewhere that was most definitely not here.

No such luck. Sharon couldn’t tell if Willie Rae had also had a few too many sips of the nog, or if this was just how Southern women were.Until this week, Brenda had been Sharon’s only example of a Southern Belle, and it didn’t take a sociologist to figure out that Brenda was an outlier. “I told Brenda Leigh that we talked all about our traditions when she was growing up,and do you know, Brenda Leigh couldn’t tell us a thing what your family did when you were a little girl. What kind of things do you girls talk about, anyway?”

Either her flaws or mine, depending on the day and the division on point. “Oh, you know. Man trouble.” Behind her mother, the Chief chokedon her wine, and Sharon suppressed a smirk. Let Brenda Leigh stew on that for a while. “We used to go see the Rockette Christmas Spectacular every year when I was growing up. My sister and I desperately wanted to be Rockettes when we grew up.”

“You’ve got the legs for it.”

Sharon sighed. He certainly had a knack for popping up at inopportune moments. “Thank you for the compliment, Lieutenant Flynn,” shehissed, “and if you ever say something like that in my presence again, I’ll have you in harassment training until you retire.”

With a swat on the arm and a “Bad boy!”, Willie Rae dismissed Flynn before turning back to Sharon and her childhood Christmas wishes. “ARockette! Oh, how lovely. How do you go from being a Rockette to being a policeofficer?” She had her hands clasped against her chest as if Sharon had just told her the baby Jesus himself had come down to compliment her sweater. Sharon had never seen anyone so delighted by the Rockettes, and she’d taken dance classes for fifteen years in the suburbs of New York City.

“Well, for starters, I was about ten at the time. Also, my sister found out that she was too short to be a Rockette and made me swear thatI would never audition since she couldn’t.” Sharon smiled at the memory ofDana, five feet and one inch of red hair and righteous fury, making her pinky-swear to give up her dreams of sequins and tights. “But what really did it is that I found out how much a Rockette gets paid. A police officer’s salaryseems extravagant by comparison.”

Willie Rae laughed, but the rest of the group stared at her, some open-mouthed and others, like Gabriel, slowly backing away. She shrugged. It certainly wasn’t her fault that the rest of the LAPD had forgotten that shewas, in fact, a human woman who had had a human childhood with human desiresand dreams. Well, bah humbug to them. She had better things to do than to provethe existence of her soul to these people. “Thank you for dinner, Willie Rae,but I have an early flight tomorrow. I hope we’ll see you back in LA soon, though.”

Willie Rae pulled her into a hug, and Sharon patted her back. She really was a lovely woman, and it was nice to have a mother’s hug onChristmas, even if it wasn’t her own.  Onimpulse, she kissed Willie Rae’s cheek, then pulled away, eager to make hergetaway before she let the Christmas spirit get the best of her emotions.

Chief Johnson grabbed the handle of Sharon’s suitcase. “I’ll walk you out.”

“So close,” Sharon muttered. She followed behind Brenda, two sets of heels clacking in the empty hallway.

“Thanks, Captain, for your help.”

Well, that was a first. “It’s my job, Chief. I’m just glad we could close the case.”

“No, I mean thank you for your help with my mother. She doesn’t get to meet many of my friends, and she took a shine to you all right.I appreciate it.”

Sharon blinked, at a loss for words. There was that f-word again, being thrown around awfully casually today. “You’re welcome. I enjoyedit. You know, your mother is quite the cook.”

“I know. Her sweet potatoes are the best part of Christmas.”

Truly, they were spectacular, Sharon had to admit. “I thought you said the marshmallows were burned.”

“Well,” Brenda shrugged, a smile making its way across her face. “I happen to like my marshmallows kinda burned.” She pushed the suitcase to Sharon and waved awkwardly. “See you after the break.”

“Merry Christmas,” Sharon called after her, “and-“

“I know,” came Brenda’s voice from down the hall, “Happy, HAPPY New Year!”

[holylulusworld]

Married per accident – Part 11

Summary: After her fiancée cheated on her the reader meets a hot stranger in a bar and get married. She's got no clue that he is Jensen Ackles.

Pairing: Jensen x Reader

Warnings: drunken marriage, ‘role play’ (kinda), smut, fingering, tension, making out (public), vaginal sex (unprotected), Jensen’s (low voice)

Married per accident Masterlist

2 months later, 1st wedding anniversary…

"You really are nuts, Jay!" You scold.

“Why?”

“Jensen, you rented the whole bar and the same suite for our anniversary?”

“I wanted to do it again.”

"You cheesy little charmer."

Humming Jensen pours you the same drink you had when you met one year ago.

“So are you alone here?” He asks.

“Yeah, my fiancée broke up with me,” you say giggling.

“His loss, my win. How about we leave the bar to go somewhere else?” Jensen whispers in your ear.

“Hmmm…why not Mr. Low Voice.”

Following you out of the bar Jensen pushes you against the nearby wall, just like the first time.

“God, you’re so beautiful,” Jensen groans. “Can I bring you to your room?”

“Such a gentleman.”

Taking your hand in his he leads you to the room you occupied one year ago.

“I want you, I know we barely know each other, but I want you.”

“I don’t do such a thing, I’m…still…innocent. I want to wait till marriage,” you whisper into Mr. Low Voice’s ear.

“Virgin? How can you still be… God, I want you so bad. You’re the one…” Kneeling in front of you Mr. Low Voice asks you to marry him. Giggling you say ‘yes’.

After the ceremony in the chapel, you kiss Mr. Low Voice full of passion.

“I can’t believe I married you.”

“Now I’m going to carry you over the threshold,” Jensen says before picking you up.

Giggling you hold tight onto his neck while he carries you into the suite.

“You’re strong, Jay.”

Humming Jensen places you carefully on the huge bed. Admiring you for a moment he smiles down at you.

“Are you sure you want to do this with me? I’m a complete stranger to you.”

“I don’t know why, but I trust you, Jay. I want you to be my first, you’re my husband after all so…let’s do this.”

“Let’s do this?”

Humming you grab the hem of Jensen’s shirt to kiss him roughly. Moaning he slides his tongue with yours.

“You know that didn’t happen the first time,” Jensen chuckles.

“I’m improvising; you should know that, you’re an actor after all.”

“You know you were shy until I had you naked and writhing underneath me, god all the noises you made for me.”

“I needed to release some pressure, you’re big and you know what you’re doing.”

“Good, then let’s do it right now, baby.”

“No, no…you didn’t say that,” you scold.

“Hmm…I said you’re beautiful and that I’m going to make you feel so good. That you will remember that night for the rest of your life.”

“Yes, Jay. Let’s make a memory…now…”

Stripping your clothes off you leave only your underwear on. Biting your lower lip you watch your husband undressing. Flushing red you stare at the crotch in his boxers.

“So beautiful, my beautiful wife.”

Kissing you softly he open the clasp of your bra with one hand. Letting the fabric slide down your arms you let Jensen kneading your breasts. Pinching your nipples he smiles at you.

“Do you often marry women you just met?” You ask giggling.

“Hmm…only the one I love.”

Kissing down your stomach Jensen drags your panties down, using his teeth. Licking your lips you see his darkened eyes and you can’t wait for what will come.

“Jay? Do you really want to do this?”

“You’re my wife now. I really need to do this with you. The moment I entered the bar I wanted you.”

“I wanted you too. You looked so hot, you smelled so good and your eyes made my heart melt.”

“Let me make you feel good. Let me touch you the way you should be touched for the first time.”

“Yes, Jay. Please, touch me.”

Not hesitating any longer Jensen kisses your mound. Green eyes focussed on you he licks through your folds.

A soft moan leaves your lips when he caresses your clit with his tongue. You want to remain silent but you can’t. From the first night on you spend with your green-eyed stranger you couldn’t hold back the noises.

His lips are sealed around your clit now. Slowly circling one finger around your entrance he gathers some slick. Thrusting two fingers into you he watches your body reacting to him.

Back arched, hips meeting the thrusts of his fingers and screams of pleasure. Looking at you full of adoration he rubs over your g-spot.

Falling back onto the pillow you moan Jensen’s name.

“So beautiful. Look at my beautiful innocent wife,” he rasps.

Kissing up to your stomach he smiles against your skin when you move your hands through his hair like you did that first night.

A soft kiss planted to your collarbone makes you gasp. Feeling his hard cock nudging against your entrance you smile at Jensen.

“You sure?” He asks again, still playing his role.

“Yes, Jay. I want you to be my first.”

“My beautiful wife.”

Kissing you softly he makes you melt into the mattress. Slowly entering you he chuckles when you buck your hips to make him slide into you completely.

“Impatient?”

“Addicted, Ackles. You ruined me, I guess.”

“Hmm…yeah.”

Moving slow and even he looks down at you. His eyes never leave your face. Giving him a shy smile you move your arms around his neck to bring him down for a kiss.

Bodies moving in sync and lips taking each other's breath away Jensen feels your walls tighten around him. A few gentle strokes later you writhe underneath him.

Not using protection he fills you with his seed hoping he can give you what you want…a baby.

“I love you, Jay.”

“I love you too. Do you want to marry me a third time?”

“God, your family will hate me…we married again without telling anyone,” you say laughing.

“Is that a yes?”

“Yes, that is a yes, Jensen.”

Married per accident Tags

@bitchwhytho, @gh0stgurl​​, @woodworthti666

Forever Tags

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[twdmusicboxmystery]

Mailbag Fan Question and Oh the Possibilities!

Okay, this came out the week before the finale aired but I never got around to posting about it. There’s the obvious suspicious stuff, which I’ll point out, but doing research on the details, I also found some interesting connections.

So part of the Mailbag Fan Question post for the finale was, “What happened to the remaining hospital staff at Grady Memorial?”

Let's appreciate the fact that I don't think this came from a TD-er. It probably came from someone in the GA, which means we’re not the only ones who’ve noticed the oddity of Grady being left standing and what to know what’s up.

Why include this in the fan mailbag right before the finale? Obviously we didn’t see Grady in the finale or anything about it. So why put this here? They get thousands of fan questions and generally only include the ones that are asked the most or are super relevant to the upcoming episode. And of course thy don’t reveal any spoilers. So again, why have this question?

You could argue it’s to remind us of Grady's unfinished story line. Between this and all the suspicious tweets the Grady actors have written over the years, it’s obvious Grady will become relevant again at some point. That alone doesn’t prove we’re right about Beth being alive, but let’s be real. She was the ONLY character that had a meaningful arc at Grady. The ONLY one privy to all the things going on there or who learned anything meaningful from it. If Grady is going to become relevant again, then Beth is going to become relevant again.

But again, why give us a Grady Update now? Again, the actors have tweeted things out over all the seasons, so why is AMC choosing this moment, this finale to post this?

Obviously we can’t say for sure, but I think it’s just more proof of how close she is. They post this before a finale that had Alone parallels, a blond walker who got an icicle in the eye, Christmas themes, and Daryl staring at Beth’s picture. Not at all what I would call a coincidence. I’m thinking more and more that we’ll see her early in S10 (kinda like we saw Morgan early in S5). I think all of this points to that. While we may have a long hiatus ahead of us, I think we’ll see Beth in the next handful of episodes which, in the scope of the show, really isn’t far away at all.

Now let’s look at the answers. First, let me credit those in my group who hashed all this out for us. They include @frangipanilove, @bethgreeneprevails, @thegloriouscollectorlady, and @wdway. This is a collection of their thoughts and mine.

First of all, it says that the Grady people perform an apocalyptic musical. Do you really think “music” is a coincidence? Even putting Beth aside, the last episode the Grady staff were in is called Coda, which is a musical term. But we can't really put aside Beth because she was the songbird on the show. The only one who literally sang.

They also say the musical is called Mammalton. I would've known that reference but luckily other people in my group did. It's a play on the show, Hamilton which is a famous off-Broadway musical. More on that in a minute.

Then it says Mammalton is the story of mammals taking over and forming their own democracy following the collapse of society. That strikes me as pretty much exactly what was happening at Grady. Society collapsed and this group of people was trying to create a new society on all their own. Of course, it was extremely flawed and not much of a democracy, but still. So perhaps this is a way of saying that Grady is still standing, and that maybe it created a better society after TF family left. Hmm. Wonder who could be leading that.

I also had the thought that it might be a play on the word, Slabtown. Even though Mammalton is a play on the name, Hamilton, it sounds a little like “Mammaltown.” In a way, that might give some insight in the title, Slabtown. If the “town” part simply represents a particular society, then Slabtown signified that this society bread only death, rather than hope, and was a subtle clue to Beth’s fate in 5x08.

Then there's the songs that are mentioned. "Stay Alive," "The Dead Commandments," and "The Gory of Tonight (reprise)." These, too, are plays on titles of songs from the musical Hamilton. The songs from the play are called, “Stay Alive,” “The Ten Duel Commandments,” and “The Story of Tonight.” 

Come on now. Stay Alive? Can we get any more obvious than that? The Dead Commandments. Obviously, it's a biblical reference to the Ten Commandments, but remember that we saw pictures of baby Moses and the burning bush on Father Gabriel's wall in Strangers. You know, right before we saw Beth on the Grady story line?

And it strikes me as a progression. Moses was separated from his true people and family as a baby. The same thing happened to Beth back in S5. She became separated from TF. Now we have reference to the Ten Commandments. Moses didn’t bring the Ten Commandments to his people until years later (*ahem* time jump *ahem*) after he’d reunited with his real family. So seeing Baby Moses pictures in 5x02 foreshadowed Beth’s separation from TF, and Ten Commandments referenced before the finale may foreshadow…her return.

The Story of Tonight has less obvious ties to TD, but the “gory” part is obviously a general TWD theme. I did look into what the song is about and it’s about revolution and fighting for what you believe in, even when it’s not by far the easiest thing to do. So it works well with TWD.

So this “Grady Update” would be super suspicious just with what I’ve said so far, right? But naturally, there’s more. As I looked into the musical Hamilton, something else occurred to me. Another connection between this and something else AMC put out this season.

They’ve used two real paintings as part of their promotion this season. There’s this Thanksgiving picture, and then this Crossing of the Delaware picture. In both cases, they superimposed TWD characters onto the faces in the picture. I’m going to reference the Crossing the Delaware picture today. 

Our group has discussed it back and forth quite a bit and tried to read TD stuff into it. We’ve been moderately successful. But reading through the plot of Hamilton, the musical, I made a huge connection.  

So, a little background for those who aren’t familiar. This painting depicts a famous event during the American Revolution, when George Washington crossed the Delaware River (an extremely dangerous crossing) on Christmas Eve and surprised his enemies at dawn. It was a major victory because they took the enemy's camp while the enemy were still asleep and half drunk on Christmas wine and were able to completely overtake the camp without a single loss of American life. I think a few of the enemy were killed, but not many. It's a very famous story.

In my group, we found this interesting anyway because of the Christmas references here, the river (water) and of course the founding fathers suggest DC. And of course in the finale, TF did cross a river, albeit a frozen one.

So what does this have to do with this mailbag fan question?

Well, the plot of the musical Hamilton is basically about Alexander Hamilton. It's a play that tells the story of his life through true historical events and the eyes of other founding fathers, who are all part of the play. I connected it to the painting of George Washington, because during the famous Crossing of the Delaware, Alexander Hamilton was Washington's aid-de-camp, which means he was Washington’s right-hand man.

So this reference to the musical Hamilton and the picture of George Washington crossing the Delaware on Christmas Eve are connected.

Reading through the plot of Hamilton in more detail, there’s a few suspicious things. Rick’s face is the one on George Washington’s in the picture, right? Well, if Hamilton was Washington’s right hand man, who does Hamilton represent in this analogy? You’d think it would be Daryl because Daryl has always been Rick’s right hand guy. In short, it’s not. Hamilton is Beth. Let me explain why.

1. Hamilton isn’t actually present in the famous painting. Most of the others in the boat with Washington don’t represent real historical figures. They’re more like composites of people involved in the American Revolution in some way. Many of them have varied cultural clothing to represent different countries and factions who took part. So Hamilton, though he was there historically, is not actually represented in this famous painting. (Beth is not there with TF right now.) Plus, Daryl’s face is on another character in the boat, (the one near the front) which specifically is NOT Hamilton, so Daryl can’t be Hamilton.

2. Reading through the synopsis of the play, there’s a whole section about a man named Charles Lee who is granted a command by George Washington, but turns out to be a terrible field commander. After Washington fires him, Lee goes on a tirade against Washington, claiming that he’s an unfit leader. Hamilton wants to challenge this man on Washington's behalf, but things get complicated. I was just thinking that sounds an awful lot like what happened at Grady with Dawn and Capt. Hansen. Unfit leaders, challenges, duels? Major parallels there.

3. When Hamilton dies near the end of the play, he’s shot in a duel. He ends up in musket duel with someone he truly doesn’t want to kill. So when they turn and fire at one another, he misses on purpose (kinda like Beth stabbing Dawn when she must have know that wouldn’t kill her) and is in turn shot himself (just like Beth.) Interestingly, the final musical number in the play is called, “Who lives, who dies, Who Tells Your Story.”

In short, I think it’s safe to say that Beth = Hamilton in this scenario, which makes even more sense because Hamilton was used to answer a question about Grady. If the musical is about Hamilton’s lives and battles, then applied to Grady, it pretty much has to mean Hamilton = Beth.

So the short of this is that both these things—the Grady Update and the Crossing of the Delaware picture—point to Beth’s imminent return.

The long of it is that this has me spinning in tons of directions. It’s all just conjecture and head canons and predictions I have absolutely no way of verifying right now, but I can’t help myself. Given that Hamilton is Washington’s right hand man (Rick in the picture) and that I’ve always compared the Dawn/Hanson dynamic to a Beth/Rick dynamic (details HERE) and the fact that Grady was practically part of Rick’s hallucination right before he disappeared… 

And then there’s THIS POST I made a million years ago about how this shot from Coda shows that Rick, Daryl and Beth will be on similar leadership levels…

I’m just thinking more and more that it makes sense that Rick and Beth will end up in the same place. That would make all their parallels make perfect sense. And while I 100% think she’ll be a leader in her own right, wouldn’t it be super cool if she met up with Rick and sort of stepped into Daryl’s shoes as Rick’s right hand person for a while? That would REALLY put her and Daryl on the same level, wouldn’t it?

Not to mention…Legs? Beth? Red Machete? Rick?  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Okay, okay. Again, this is all conjecture and my imagination is running away with me. Just wanted to point all this out because I think they’ve give us some heavy foreshadowing here and even if I’m not interpreting it entirely correctly, it’s super-important for S10. Thoughts?

[ayeletgalena]

Bris Speech for Gabriel Solomon (Gavi) Galena

“Angels All Around” - Lincoln Square Synagogue 5/30/19 

--

So I was walking to shul this morning and I saw a watch store – with a big watch in the window. I walked in thinking I could get my watch fixed before the bris. The man behind the desk said, “Sorry sir, this is a mohel office – I’m a mohel, my father, my grandfather... in short, we’re all mohels.”  

“So you can't fix my watch?” The mohel responds abruptly “No”. 

So I ask while leaving, “So why then is there a big watch in the window if this is a mohel office?”

He responds, “And what exactly would you like us to put in the window....?”

Ha, I mean how many times do you get to do a Mohel Joke? I heard Seth Rogen got his start writing mohel jokes.....

----

So anyways, thank you Rabbis, friends & family for being here to welcome our little malach (malach means angel) Dovid Gavriel...

spoiler alert: We’re calling him Gavi…. I like the alliteration in a newscaster voice: “I’m Gavi Galena, The 10 O’Clock News” 

….A special thank you from myself and Hindy to the grandparents: Rabbi Reuben Poupko & Mindy, Bobby & Arna Fisher, and my mom Rita Lourie Galena for everything we know you do ...and even more for what we don’t know. It’s so special to have the blessing of grandparents on this special day as our Gavi joins the tribe.

Also to our siblings here and not here: Adina, Sarah, Benj, Isaac and Yael, Avi/Shifra, Tamar/Elliot, Ezy/Chany and Jen/David, Ari/Elyssa and Amy & Ben Fisher, Ben actually here from Chicago, thank you!

I say if the number of Poupko WhatsApps is an indication of love, this kid is set for life.  

---

So to talk about our little angel, in Hebrew Dovid Gavriel, in English Gabriel Solomon. I’d like to point to his two great grandfathers - Grandpa David Panar and Zayde Solomon Galena of blessed memory who he is named after.

This is a malach/melech (angel/king) theme – so the names David and Solomon. Two kings, standing beside you right now little Gavi.

First to the Hebrew. Dovid - Hindy’s famous grandpa Dave Panar. Arna’s incredible gentleman of a father who embodied integrity & ingenuity.  A mechanical engineer and later professor for over 25 years at the University of Alberta - he specialized in building, fixing and flying aircraft engines. He was trained first during WW2, he later found himself in Israel right before the war of Independence, and Israel had no airforce or fighter planes.

Miraculously, like everything in Israel’s history, out of the sky an Egyptian fighter jet crash lands on the Tel Aviv beach and the Israeli’s thought, heck we might be able to use this plane. In came David, who guided the search for building parts and then eventually figured out how to built Israel’s first fighter plane - The “Black Spit" -- critical to Israel’s success in the War of Independence. He gave Israel their wings. 

He went on to become a dedicated, beloved, and inspiring teacher and storyteller, so much like his daughter, Hindy’s mother Arna embodies, through her innovative educational work at Wexner Heritage and the University of Cincinnati. Both giving their students the profound unexpected inspiration, the angelic wings to go out there and soar.

So for Gavi, the wings of Israel were built on the back of your great grandpa David Panar and they are passed on to you little Gavi, to wear with pride, wisdom, strength & courage.

---

The next Melach is King Solomon, My Zayde of Worcester Massachusetts. Basically the exact opposite. He was a big, big guy, with an even bigger Massachusetts accent, and after serving in WW2 he took over his dad’s garbage business and almost everyone in town knew him. He could have easily been cast in the Sporano’s - “Solly Baby!” they would say when he appeared, The Jewish garbage & rubbish man. He cleaned up messes all around town. In fact, my year in Israel I get to yeshiva and when I say my name an older rebbe stands up and says what I hope is some connection to Philly or Twins etc, “Galena? Is your grandfather the famous garbage man in Worcester?” Nachas I never wanted but Galena’s always somehow make a name for themselves. 

My dad and our Zayde would always call us “his helpers” -- his literal malachim, surrounding him with love. And I find myself doing the same with my own children, my helpers.

---

Then the final malach - the Gavriel -  is the name we added. Gavriel is one of the archangels in the Torah, meaning God is my strength, my courage, my hero.

Funny thing about angels - my son Akiva once saw a Christmas special on TV and asked me about angels, he said so is Santa invisible? I said yes not really listening. Like Moshiach? I turn around um NO. Oh more like Hashem?? NOOO. So anyways I have some educational work to do but you get the point.  It’s a weird concept. Angels have one mission? They are invisible? They are holy? 

But when you look at who Gavriel is, he is kinda the badass angel. He represents justice, strength might, din. 

He is sorta the Fixer, the Michael Clayton, he cleans up messes. But Gavriel is all about the courage to do and fight for what is right. The original Avenger. He burns things down to build things back up. 

Side note: Gavriel is also apparently the angel of fire, and since Gavi was born on Lag Ba’Omer we found this a fitting sign for his name. Gavriel’s fire, not like Shimon bar Yochai’s fiery eyes, is often, in the end, used for the good of the story….Like the Dragon in Game of Thrones it can be fire for good (against white walkers) or fire for bad (women children in King’s Landing). Making hindy the mother of dragons..

Here are some Midrashic examples of the angel Gavriel interceding:

-Gavriel is one of 3 angels that visit Avraham after his bris, only to tell him he is off to destroy Sedom -He points Yosef in the right direction of his brothers, only so they can sell him into slavery -He collects the signs Yehuda gave Tamar only so she can confirm his paternity -He castrates Potifar (bris theme) so his wife needs Yosef, only to throw him in jail -He knocks out all the maidservants so Batya can pull out baby Moshe from the basket - He pushes baby Moshe’s hand to choose the burning hot coal instead of the gold, only to cause lisp    -He puts a tail on Vashti so she cant come out for Achashveirosh, 

There are many more.  It’s wild. Angels are nowhere and everywhere. And all these instances seem bad or painful, but in the long term ended up being the most critical pivot in our Jewish narrative.

And I ask myself - how many angels have done minor redirects in our lives? I turn left not right, meet this new person or see this old face. How many angels are in this beautiful shul alone listening. 

What I call Invisible Interventions. Little things change the course of the story. The faith in seeing the long of the story. This is the Gevura.

As the famous question around this time asks: Why is the chapter about Har Sinai next to the laws of Shmita? What’s one have to do with the other?

Because real strength is not just doing all the mitzvot- it’s the faith in waiting, holding off, the perseverance of staying the course for a year - and for some, many years. I think about on a personal level: How many needles, doctors, IVFs, retrievals did Hindy go through for this baby to get to this very moment? How many angels intervened? To believe that holding strong, come what may, is a real strength.

Azeh Ho Gibor? Hakovesh et yitzro... When do we feel most holy like angels? at the end of Yom Kippur, by holding off, by not eating. Neilah we are like angels. It’s the holding off that allows us to soar.

In our story - If our son Akiva represents comfort from loss, and Talia our blessing, Gavi represents our return of being fearless. The courage to continue. To move forward.

We have been blessed to be surrounded by angels on all four sides, as the song goes, with Rafael healing and comfort behind us ...and now Gavriel by our side. 

And as I think we can all feel in this room, if we close our eyes – V’al Roshi, V’Al Roshi - Shechina’s Kail, God’s presence, embracing us holding us, like a Rabbi Poupko classic bearhug.

---

One final interpretation of angels is in Pirkei Avos, and with this, I’ll close, it says that with each and every prayer or good deed a person does, you create an advocate, an angel. Angels are created by doing good. 

And what seems like yesterday, with the loss of our first star, angel Ayelet, still burning bright guiding us – like the torch of Lag Ba’omer...I don’t know the number of angels/advocates created by each of you here and our Ayelet Nation beyond – you have gotten us this far, your prayers/deeds were advocates - and with the new strength of our new little helper Gavi, I know we will continue to shine. 

May we all be zocheh today, tomorrow to go out there and keep creating angels… for ourselves, for others, and for our community - bimhayra vyamenu amen.

[augustawren]

101 Questions You Should Be Able to Answer About Your Character

Filled out for Savior AU

1. What is your full name? Do you have a nickname? Uh, I guess my birth name was Fayri Underhill. I go by Wren. Soon to be Wren Meluir. *grins* Thrush calls me Little Bird or Aiwë. Blaise calls me Little One.  2. How old are you? When is your birthday? I’m 20 and my birthday, I just found out, is the 3rd of Maen. So I guess I’ll be 21 soon. 3. Where were you born? Where do you live now? Are you patriotic? I was born in the Rillands but I don’t remember it. I’m from Dolbry, in Saumermere. Am I patriotic? *snorts* Not unless it’s to Dolbry. 4. Who are/were your parents? (Names, occupations, personalities, etc.) Alice and Harper Underhill. Harper is dead and I never knew him. He didn’t try and save me from being kidnapped, so no great loss. I don’t actually know what he and Alice did for work. *shrugs* Alice is okay. She’s kinda nice. 5. Do you have any siblings? What are/were they like? Yeah. I got a sister. She’s fine. I wish we were closer but... *shrugs again* whatever. She left. 6. What is your occupation? Thief? If that counts as a job? 7. How tall are you? How much do you weigh? 2′11.5 ft tall, I’m gaining my weight back so I’m probably about 25lbs. Can’t see my ribs no more, and look at these tits, yeah?? 8. What color is your hair? What color are your eyes? My hair is mostly white but I still got some brown on the sides. My eyes are hazel. 9. What is your race? I’m a halfling (white) 10. To which social class do you belong? The shit one? 11. Do you consider yourself to be attractive? Do others? HAHAHAHAHA no. Thrush does, I guess. Devlin did, I think.  12. What is your style of dress? I like to be comfortable. Breeches and a plain shirt works just fine for me. 13. Do you have any scars? Tattoos? Birthmarks? Other unique physical features? You wanna talk scars? You got all day? There’s the one from a knife across my lips, the ones from a whip all over my back (think 8 years worth of regular whippings), the brand on my left shoulder (circle with two horizontal lines), a few burn scars on my palms and knees. I have two tattoos, one on my right hip of a butterfly (prevents pregnancy) and one on my left forearm of a wren and a thrush flying together. I’ve got freckles pretty much all over. 14. Do you have any allergies, diseases, or other physical weaknesses? One time I ate a muffin with teeny seeds in it and my mouth swelled up and I couldn’t breathe. I got a thing in my right hand where a broken bone didn’t heal right, but other than that, I’m fit as a fiddle! ((she has severe PTSD, dissociative disorders including dissociative amnesia and dissociative fugue, is possibly borderline, and has severe attachment issues)) 15. Are you right- or left-handed? I can use both pretty well, but I guess I write and stuff with my right, but when I’m juggling, my left leads. 16. What does your voice sound like? Ehhh... I dunno? My Dolbry accent is pretty thick, yeah? Sometimes I talk real fast. 17. What kind of vocabulary do you use? The street kind, ya porcelain. 18. List three quirks or other defining characteristics. 1-- I dunno if it’s a quirk, but I don’t like carrying less than twelve knives on me at a time. More, usually, but the baseline is twelve. 2-- I like dancin’. Both with music and with daggers. 3--  19. How often do you bathe? Do you wear perfumes? When I can, I guess. It’s not my favorite thing to do, unless I’m with Thrush. And no, I don’t wear perfume. I used to use a lavender and honey soap, but I don’t so much anymore. 20. What kind of facial expression do you commonly wear (dour glare, wry smile, etc)? Depends who I’m with. With Thrush I’ve been all smiles lately. I guess in general it’s more a ‘get the fuck outta my way’ glare. 21. Do you use body language? How? Yeah, I guess I can be easy to read. My body language is stiff when I’m pissed off, I dance around when I’m happy, that kinda stuff. 22. Do you have a commonly used saying? Heh, yeah, well, I used to, whenever I’d open a lock, I’d say “you’re the joke and baby I’m the punchline”. It’s funny, yeah? *giggles* And, uh, well, Gabriel always said “no loose ends” and “only worth your weight” so... I still think those a lot. Childhood 23. What is your earliest memory? Ah, you really wanna go there? They’re not good. Um, they all kinda blur together. Being whipped, I guess. Lots of blood. 24. How much schooling have you had? Did you enjoy it? I was mentored and taught by a few member of the guild for several years. I hated most of the book learning, but loved everything else. 25. Where did you learn most of your knowledge and skill? The Thieves Guild 26. How would you describe your childhood in general? Half hell, half hard work. 27. As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up? Uh, well, until I was about ten all I wanted to do was die. After that, I guess I just wanted to be the best thief ever. 28. When and with whom was your first kiss? Widget kissed me when he first got to the factory. I was like six-ish. After that, I kissed Thrush under the holly when I was seventeen. 29. Are you a virgin? If not, when and with whom did you lose your virginity? Nope. I fucked a guy named Leo. Turned out it was a real bad mistake for both of us. He went bragging about it and got nearly all his men killed. 30. Do you have a notorious or celebrated ancestor? Does that affect you? Nope and nope. I’m the notorious one, but I’m not gonna be anyone’s ancestor. Influences 31. What do you consider the most important event of your life so far? Meeting Thrush 32. What do you consider your greatest achievement? Destroying the factory and killing Fang 33. What is your greatest regret? Not going back for Widget  34. What is the most embarrassing or shameful thing ever to happen to you? Wow, you sure you wanna ask to someone who was kept for a slave for almost ten years? Take a wild guess. 35. Do you have any secrets? If so, what are they? See the above. 36. What is the most evil thing you have ever done? Ehh... I dunno. Evil’s kinda subjective. I cut out a half orc’s tongue, eyes, and heart while he was still alive once. And killed his familiar right in front of him. But HE was real evil. 37. When was the time you were the most frightened? When I was little. My last night in the factory. 38. Have you ever traveled outside of your country? If so, to where? Nope. Unless you count other planes, I guess. Beliefs 39. What is your alignment? Chaotic neutral 40. Are you basically optimistic or pessimistic? I’ve been gettin more optimistic, but usually I’ma pessimist.  41. Do you believe in a god? If so, which one and why? I believe that they exist but I don’t exactly worship one anymore.  Used to be Yondalla. 42. Do you believe in an afterlife? I guess. 43. What is your greatest fear? Being alone 44. What makes you angry? Sad? Happy? Why? Angry-- when people act like they know what’s best for me Sad-- Innocents suffering Happy-- Thrush, food, dancing, sex, Widget 45. Do you think people are basically good or basically evil? Pretty evil generally 46. What are your views on politics? Religion? Sex? Don’t care about any of it except sex. That I’m all open and free about. 47. What are your views on gambling, lying, theft, and killing? All necessary, and all things I’ve done.   48. How far will you go to defend your beliefs? To the ends of the earth. Pretty sure I demonstrated that in Dolbry, and Ima do it again with this whole Belmont thing. 49. How much do you value money? Only worth my weight. Gold is everything. Gold is life. 50. In your opinion, what is the most evil thing any human being could do? Uh... Be Fang. Enslave and kill kids, do what he did to Thrush and that girl, all that. 51. Do you believe in self-sacrifice for the greater good? Yeah 52. Do you believe in the existence of soul mates and/or true love? Most definitely. Look at me and Thrush. 53. Are you superstitious? Nah, not really. 54. How much do you respect the beliefs and opinions of others? Depends on if they’re stupid. 55. How honest are you about your thoughts and feelings? Not very. Unless I’m talking to Thrush, I guess. 56. Do you have any biases or prejudices? I don’t like dwarves all that much, but that’s cause their food sucks and one of them is married to my sister, which is fucking weird. Dealing With Others 57. Who is the most important person in your life, and why? Thrush. He just is. He’s my world. 58. Who is the person you respect the most? Despise the most? Why? Respect the most? Lou. I never realized what she had to go through until I had to lead people, too. Despise the most? Well, now that Fang’s dead, and Gabriel... Probably Belmont. But Lily’s a close second. 59. Do you have a significant other? Who? In case you haven’t figured it out. Yeah. Thrush. 60. Do you have a lot of friends? Who is your best friend? I guess more than I thought I did. I used to think I didn’t have any. Widget is my best friend. 61. How do you relate to members of the same race? Class? Sex? I don’t know a ton of halflings, but I tend to like them when I meet them. If other rogues are on my side, I love ‘em. Girls are great.  62. How do you relate to members of a different race? Class? Sex? Different races are mostly fine. Wish they were a little shorter, most times. Other classes are fine. Unless you mean social class, then I tend to not get on too well with the porcelains.  63. Have you ever been in love? If so, describe what happened. Yeah, twice. Things didn’t work with Devlin, obviously, and Thrush and I stayed away from each other for a long time, but now we’re together. 64. What do you look for in a potential lover? They’re sexy either in how they look or act. I need to trust them at least to a degree. 65. How close are you to your family? Not close. At all. 66. Do you want a marriage, family, and/or children? Marriage, yes, and we’re about to do that. No to anything else. 67. Do you tend to argue with people, or avoid conflict? Argue. Please see: my relationship with Devlin 68. Are you a listener or a talker? I guess I’m a talker? 69. How long does it usually take for you to trust others? A looooooooooonnnnnnnnnggggggggggggggggggg time. Like, think years. And years. To fully trust, anyway. I trust Blaise and I just met her a few months ago, but pretty much everyone else it takes years. 70. Do you hold grudges? Oh fuck yes I do. 71. Do you tend to take on leadership roles in social situations? Not generally, no. Though I guess I might a bit more after this whole Dolbry mess. 72. Do you like interacting with large groups of people? HA! No. Nooooo. I hate it. Last time it happened, I blanked out and don’t remember what happened. 73. How well do you express yourself? Not very well unless Thrush and I are alone together. 74. How quickly do you judge others? Pretty fast. Sizing people up is what I was trained to do. 75. Do you care what others think of you? Yeah, I guess so. I dunno, I just hate the way people pity me 76. Do you have any enemies? How or why are they your enemy? I guess people who don’t like what I did in Dolbry? And Belmont and his people. Personal Taste and Opinions 77. What is your favorite pastime? Color? Food? Possession? I like to dance and practice tumbling and backflips. I used to draw a little. My favorite color is stormy blue. My favorite food is chocolate cake with raspberries. And my favorite possession is probably my book of elven love poetry from Thrush. Followed closely by my new ruby necklace from him. 78. What are your preferences in arts and/or entertainment? I thought that play about me was HILARIOUS. I like funny things like that, not the weird tragedies the theater people sometimes do. For art, I like Thrush’s drawings and carvings. Soft, flowing things like that. 79. Do you smoke, drink, go whoring, or use drugs? Why or why not?. I drink and sleep around a bit with Thrush. And... because it’s fun? 80. How do you spend a typical Saturday night? Fighting or fucking. 81. What is your most cherished fantasy? Every day is a fantasy with Thrush. But I really can’t wait to have a house with him. I just wanna do regular shit with him. Make breakfast. Sleep in our own bed. Laugh and run naked through the house. 82. How long is your attention span? I can be pretty focused when I wanna be, but I’m not very patient most of the time 83. Do you laugh a lot? What do you find funny? When I’m with Thrush. I dunno, I guess I find a lot of shit funny.  84. Is there anything that shocks or offends you? If so, what? Not generally. I don’t like when people are rude about other people for no reason 85. How do you deal with stress? Depends how bad it is. If it’s real bad, my mind can blank out and I disappear in myself 86. How much athletic ability do you have? Artistic? I can climb and tumble and balance and dance. I can draw a little bit. 87. Do you like animals? Do you like children? Animals are okay. Kids are... weird. I like Trynni, but that’s about it. 88. Are you spontaneous, or do you always need to have a plan? Kinda both. I guess more spontaneous 89. What are your pet peeves? “You’re not being fair” say it to me and you’re dead. People being fake. People being too nice. Self-Image 90. What is your greatest strength as a person? Weakness? I guess I’ve been through a lot of shit. And when you’ve been through shit and survived, people like to call you “resilient” or whatever. As for weaknesses, I’m emotional, irrational, short-tempered, and don’t think things through 91. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? Pretty much everything 92. Are you generally introverted or extroverted? Introverted? I dunno. I used to be a lot more so. 93. Do you like yourself? Not really, but Thrush is helping me see some positives 94. Do you have a daily routine? How do you feel if your day is interrupted? I used to in the Guild, and I kinda liked it. Now time is super free 95. What goal do you most want to accomplish in the next six months? Your lifetime? Kill Belmont. Get a house. Figure out how to live as long as an elf. 96. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? 10 years? 20 years? With Thrush. With Thrush. With Thrush. 97. If you could choose, how would you want to die? In Thrush’s arms. 98. What is the one thing you would like to be remembered for after your death? Doing what I could for Dolbry 99. What three words would you use to best describe your personality? unstable, impulsive, fierce 100. What three words would others probably use to describe you? mischievous, ruthless (according to Grul), cheeky 101. Why are you risking your life to adventure?  To save the world, duh. Because I, you know, live in the world.