#miracle tonic cookie

[ju-lie-mine]

birthday art for my friend!

[chrancecriber]

Radio NET Bulgaria (October 21, 2022)

23:58 JEFFERY SMITH - Shake It Up 23:55 PAUL TAYLOR - Epic Dream 23:51 PEET PROJECT - Sunday at the Spa 23:47 DEAN JAMES - Planet Smooth 23:43 MARK JAIMES - Sidetracked 23:38 GREGG KARUKAS - Manhattan 23:35 SAM BASSMAN JENKINS - All That Bass 23:31 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - Just Feels Right 23:27 MATT MARSHAK - Lookin' Back 23:22 PATRICK BRADLEY - Catalan Feat. Jeff Lorber & Eric Marienthal 23:17 GERRY SMOOTH - Let's Dance 23:12 QUINTIN GERARD W. - Cleared for Takeoff 23:08 PAUL MESSINA & MARK R. HARRIS - Olde Skool (feat. Greg Minnick, Ignacio Nunez & Dean Rickard) 23:04 DARRON COOKIE - Back at It Again 23:00 NICHOLAS COLE - Yokohama 22:58 MARIE THERESE - Gin And Tonic (Pier-O Bossa Chill Mix) 22:54 SUPER8 & TAB, JAN BURTON - Free Love 22:50 NICOLA HITCHCOCK - Surrender 22:42 PROJECT BLUE SUN - Naked 22:37 KITARO - Caravansary 22:30 R.I.B - I Look At Sea Horizon 22:25 SUPER8 & TAB, ALYNA - Perfect Day (Original Mix) 22:20 RHEINGOLD ENSEMBLE - Deja Bo 22:16 MARKUS GARDEWEG, MICHAEL FEINER - Fairplay (Let There Be Love) (Ambient Mix) 22:12 MATT DAREY, TIFF LACEY - Always 22:08 ROMAN MESSER, LJ AYRTEN - Break The Ice (UltraNova Chillout Remix) 22:04 SWEDISH HOUSE MAFIA, JOHN MARTIN - Save The World (Matias Lehtola Unplugged Cover Mix) 21:59 RUSLAN-SET, POWERMS, V.RAY - Aspiration (Vocal Mix) 21:54 MARK WATSON - Submission 21:50 SUPERTANGOX - Last Tango In Paris 21:44 MENZI - Aufbruch 21:40 ROB NUNJES - Smells Like Teen Spirit 21:34 NO HORIZONS, SHEEMA - Summer Son 21:27 SYNTHETICSAX - Here Workin' (Dj Rostej Original Remix) 21:24 SEAL - Ooh Baby Baby 21:20 NADIA ALI - Is It Love 21:16 OXYGENE - The Ocean (Goldtripp Remix) 21:10 TONY IGY - Astronomia (Chillout Mix) 21:06 NAOKI KENJI - Maripri 21:01 RICHARD DURAND - Wide Awake (Zetandel chill rmx) 20:56 REY SALINERO - Total Delight 20:48 TORNIKE - Night Steps (Original Mix) 20:44 NOMOSK - Don't Hold Back (Soty & Seven24 Chillout Remix) 20:40 ROMAN MESSER, ROBIN VANE - Someday (Paul Echo Chillout Remix) 20:34 ROGER SANCHEZ - Another Chance (Afterlife Mix) 20:30 PIXALEND - Maritime Sadness 20:23 TRENTEMOLLER - Miss You (Lulu Rouge Feat. Asger Baden Remix) 20:19 SOUND BEHAVIOUR - Comfort Zone 20:14 HESS IS MORE - Yes Boss 20:10 SARAH MENESCAL - Don't Speak 20:07 TOUCH & GO - Straight To...Number One (Dreamcatcher Mix) 20:04 SENSPROOF - Starflight (Alex Atmospheric Chillout Remix) 20:00 TUKAN - Wonder Of Life (Chill Out Mix) 19:51 TWENTYEIGHT - Hope (original mix) 19:46 RUE DU SOLEIL - In My Heart 19:41 SHAUN ESCOFFERY - Let it Go (4 Hero mix featuring Jason Rebello) 19:36 VELVET DREAMER - Summer Breeze 19:31 VARGO - You're Not Alone 19:27 RUSSELL SIMINS - Comfortable Place 19:22 LISAYA - Falling (Roan Portman Chillout Mix) 19:16 SIMON LE GREC, DENISE GUTTENBACH - Touch Me (Original Mix) 19:10 VIV DE LA ROSA - Agua Caliente 19:04 SCHWARZ, FUNK - Rainy Ibiza 18:59 SARAH BRIGHTMAN - Beautiful 18:51 VINTAGE, MORELLI - Tree Of Life (Magnetik Remix) 18:46 SCHILLER, KATE HAVNEVIK - Don't Go 18:41 SCROOGE - African Laundry (Original Mix) 18:37 WHITE STONE - Lady 18:34 LP - Lost On You (Elk Road Remix) 18:29 SUPERLOOP - Be 18:25 SWEET EUPHONY - After We Close Our Eyes (Chillout Version) 18:22 WILDBOYZ, AMEERAH - The Sound Of Missing You (Tj's Candlelight Mix) 18:18 SHARAM, DANIEL BEDINGFIELD - The One (Downtempo Mix) 18:14 YIRUMA, RUVIN - River Flows In You 18:09 DOWNTEMPO GROOVERS - Smooth And Sexy Mix 18:02 THE THRILLSEEKERS - Dreaming of You (Tranquilo's Ambient Mix) 17:58 YANNI - Can't Wait 17:51 TARAS BAZEEV - Western 17:46 BLANK & JONES, CATHY BATTISTESSA - Miracle Man (Afterlife Remix) 17:42 BOYCHILD, SOUNDMOUSE - Counting What Ifs (Original Mix) 17:38 TOKYO COUNTERPOINT - To The Sky (Lemongrass Free Bird Remix) 17:34 DA KENT DJ AT WORK, SELECTA - Take My Heart (Da Kent Dream Of You Mix) 17:26 DELIRIUM, SARAH MCLACHLAN - Silence (Michael Woods Mix) 17:22 YANOU, DO - On And On (Piano Version) 17:19 AMAZONICS - Lovin' You (Astrovoid Remix) 17:13 LIFE AUDIENCE - Vanilla 17:10 KRISTER, DALBANI - Self Control 17:07 NATALIE RENOIR, STEREO DUB, BRAZIL XXI - Can't Take My Eyes Off You 17:04 SCUBBA, IVETTE MORAES, RONAN - The Sweetest Taboo (Remix) 17:00 EL SEGUNDO - Blue Marlin (Juan Padilla Serve Chilled Remix) 16:57 JACKIEM JOYNER - When The Time Is Right 16:53 PAUL TAYLOR - Friday@5 16:48 LOWELL HOPPER - Come On Over 16:43 EUGE GROOVE - Lampin' It 16:39 DEAN JAMES - Neon Skies 16:35 MARK JAIMES - Evenin' (feat. OLI SILK) 16:32 NORMAN BROWN - Amen 16:28 PAUL TUVMAN - For No One 16:23 PIECES OF A DREAM - People Say 16:18 JEFFERY SMITH - Visions of the Future 16:14 SAM BASSMAN JENKINS - It Makes Me Want You 16:08 OLI SILK - Su Casa, Mi Casa 16:04 PAUL BROWN - Wes' Coast Swing 16:00 PHILLIP DOC MARTIN - Won't Let Go 15:59 GERRY SMOOTH - Lazy Day 15:55 PEET PROJECT - Galaxies 15:51 QUINTIN GERARD W. - Cruisin' 0n Taxi Way 15:47 PAUL TAYLOR - Goodnight 15:42 GREGG KARUKAS - Tomorrow We Sail 15:38 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - Humble and Kind 15:33 MATT MARSHAK - One Happy Guy 15:29 MARK JAIMES - Miel's Song 15:25 JACKIE'S NEW CAR - Jackie's New Car 15:20 KEN NAVARRO - Pulse Point 15:16 JACKIEM JOYNER - When You Smile 15:12 LOWELL HOPPER - Forward Motion 15:08 SAM BASSMAN JENKINS - On The Move 15:04 A & MARK R. HARRIS - Heartfelt Prayer (feat. Ignacio Nunez & Dean Rickard) 15:00 MOTOWN MOE - Shades of Funk (feat. Chris Campbell) 14:54 JEFFERY SMITH - Summers Melody 14:50 DEAN JAMES - Can I Take You Out 14:45 GERRY SMOOTH - Solutions 14:41 PAUL TAYLOR - Straight to the Point 14:36 EUGE GROOVE - Tango In Tio 14:31 JEFF KASHIWA - Six of One 14:26 QUINTIN GERARD W. - Changing Signs 14:21 PIECES OF A DREAM - TTYL (I'm Driving) 14:18 MARK JAIMES - ABC 14:13 MEZZOFORTE - Nightfall 14:09 OLI SILK - Seasons Change 14:04 KIM WATERS - Step to This 14:00 PEET PROJECT - Veggie Love 13:58 NA & MARK R. HARRIS - A Better Day (feat. Ignacio Nunez & Jason Meekins) 13:53 GREGG KARUKAS - Cruisin' Your House at Midnite 13:49 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - I Need You 13:45 DARRON COOKIE - I'm in to You 13:41 DEAN JAMES - It's All Good 13:37 PAUL TAYLOR - One Step Closer 13:33 DEE BROWN - Controlled Passion (feat. Merlon Devine) 13:30 SAM BASSMAN JENKINS - After Hours 13:24 GERRY SMOOTH - Attitude Adjustment (feat. Judah Sealy) 13:19 MATT MARSHAK - Midtown 13:14 MARK JAIMES - Peak Too Soon 13:09 QUINTIN GERARD W. - He Loves to Play for Yahweh (Bonus Track) 13:05 KEN NAVARRO - Stoned Soul Picnic 13:00 JACKIEM JOYNER - Lil' Man Soul 13:00 MOTOWN MOE - Living My Best Life (feat. Nick Stone & Nils) 12:56 GEN SAX - Trapped in the Beat 12:50 JEFFERY SMITH - What's Your Flavor 12:46 LOWELL HOPPER - Just Chillin 12:41 EUGE GROOVE - Welcome To The Journey 12:35 DEAN JAMES - Thing Your Man Wont Do 12:31 PAUL TAYLOR - Find a Way 12:26 PIECES OF A DREAM - One for the Money 12:22 DEE BROWN - Deep Secrets (feat. Blair Bryant) 12:17 DREAMING IN COLOUR - Keepsakes 12:14 MARK JAIMES - Trigger Happy 12:09 wo Years On (feat. Jimmy Engher, Monte Mann, Ignacio Nunez & Dean Rickard) 12:05 SAM BASSMAN JENKINS - Can You Feel It 12:00 GERRY SMOOTH - Shifting Gears 11:56 JEFF KASHIWA - Do It Again 11:52 QUINTIN GERARD W. - Have a Safe Flight Home 11:46 EDGARDO CINTRON - Make It Real 11:43 OLI SILK - Easy Does It 11:39 ERIC DARIUS - Jean Maries Groove (Dedication for Prvcy Jeans) 11:34 GREGG KARUKAS - Barracude Bob 11:30 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - You Look Good 11:26 KIM WATERS - Cruising Round Rock 11:21 DEAN JAMES - Brighter Days 11:18 PEET PROJECT - Down to the Lake 11:14 SONIX - Easy Street (feat. Eric Marienthal) 11:10 COLORS IN MOTION - The Paradise (feat. Bill Joseph Flynn) 11:07 KENNEY POLSON - Love on a Two Way Street 11:04 PAUL TAYLOR - The Face of You 11:00 BONEY JAMES - Fresh Air 10:57 MARK JAIMES - We'll See (feat. Peter White) 10:54 DEE BROWN - Love You Too 10:49 KEN NAVARRO - Smooth Sensation 10:43 EDGARDO CINTRON - Oasis 10:39 JACKIEM JOYNER - Elevation 10:34 NICHOLAS COLE - Just One Night (feat. Steve Cole) 10:31 MARK R. HARRIS - Setting It Straight (feat. Ignacio Nunez & Daniele Silvestri) 10:27 SAM BASSMAN JENKINS - That's The Way Of The World 10:21 GERRY SMOOTH - Sweet Delight 10:17 NICK COLIONNE - Romantic Nites 10:13 DEAN JAMES - Home 10:09 QUINTIN GERARD W. - Latin Layover 10:05 STEVE OLIVER - She's Got The Way 10:00 EUGE GROOVE - House Of Groove 09:57 DREAMING IN COLOUR - The Dream Merchant 09:52 BONEY JAMES - Got It Goin' On 09:48 LOWELL HOPPER - The First Night 09:43 MEZZOFORTE - Four Corners 09:39 EDGARDO CINTRON - No Scrubs 09:34 JAZMIN GHENT - Work Wit' It 09:31 CHRIS 'BIG DOG' DAVIS - Whatcha Gonna Do For Me 09:27 DEE BROWN - Surrender 09:23 MATT MARSHAK - On My Way 09:19 PIECES OF A DREAM - Soul Intent 09:15 JESSY J - Mr. Prince 09:11 GREGG KARUKAS - Relentless 09:07 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - You Should Be Here 09:03 JEFF KASHIWA - Up 09:00 DEAN JAMES - DJ's Groove 08:59 A & MARK R. HARRIS - Westside Memoirs (feat. Ignacio Nunez & Dean Rickard) 08:55 STEVE OLIVER - In the Shade of Cool 08:52 PHIL DENNY - Brio Bounce 08:47 GERRY SMOOTH - I'm Glad You're Here 08:43 QUINTIN GERARD W. - Times Like These 08:39 EDGARDO CINTRON - Together Again 08:35 BONEY JAMES - Sara Smile 08:32 OLI SILK - Supersize! 08:28 CHRIS 'BIG DOG' DAVIS - You Just Smile 08:23 KEN NAVARRO - Magic 08:19 NICK COLIONNE - Got to Keep It Moving 08:15 JACKIEM JOYNER - Trinity 08:11 DEE BROWN - Make Up Your Mind 08:06 DREAMING IN COLOUR - Crosswinds 08:00 EUGE GROOVE - Days Of Soul 07:56 MARC ANTOINE - Still In Love 07:52 NELSON RANGELL - Mean Business 07:48 DEAN JAMES - Georgia On My Mind (feat. Salio) 07:44 WARREN HILL - Gimme Some 07:40 STEVE OLIVER - Chips And Salsa 07:36 REGGIE CODRINGTON - Living The Dream 07:32 EDGARDO CINTRON - Nice Little Bar 07:28 J.J. SANSAVERINO - Midnight Fizz 07:23 BONEY JAMES - Second Nature 07:21 CHRIS 'BIG DOG' DAVIS - Silver Street 07:17 R. HARRIS - Gus's Groove (feat. Ignacio Nunez, Jason Meekins & Bobby Lebel) 07:13 CHAN HALL, TONY CRADDOCK - Stay Awhile 07:08 GERRY SMOOTH - Rise Above (feat. Maestro J.) 07:03 QUINTIN GERARD W. - Attitude Indicator 07:00 DEE BROWN - The Prize 06:55 JAWANZA KOBIE - Let Me Lead 06:49 MARCUS ANDERSON - From The Heart 06:44 GREGG KARUKAS - Brooklyn Nights 06:39 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - Find Your Wings 06:34 DEAN JAMES - When I See You Smile 06:30 RICK HABANA - Paradise 06:26 STEVE OLIVER - You Rescued Me 06:22 EDGARDO CINTRON - Just Stay Home 06:16 KEN NAVARRO - Parallel Lives 06:13 CHRIS 'BIG DOG' DAVIS - Focus 06:09 NICK COLIONNE - Uncle Nick 06:04 BONEY JAMES - Camouflage 06:00 JACKIEM JOYNER - Stay With Me Tonight 05:54 EUGE GROOVE - Twelfth Night 05:50 PATRICK BRADLEY - All In 05:46 DEE BROWN - Tie The Knot (feat. Lin Rountree) 05:41 DARRON COOKIE - Red Moon 05:37 ART RUPRECHT - M & M 05:32 RICHARD ELLIOT - Corner Pocket 05:27 KEITH MASON - End of Days 05:23 PATRICK YANDALL - It's Our Time 05:19 JOEL DEL ROSARIO - Sunrise on the Sunset 05:14 GREGG KARUKAS - Silent Promise 05:09 EDGARDO CINTRON - Just A Little Taste of Your Love 05:05 CHRIS 'BIG DOG' DAVIS - Fall Back 05:00 DREAMING IN COLOUR - Twilight Drive 04:57 STEVE OLIVER - Magic World 04:53 MARC ANTOINE - Eclectic World 04:49 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - Used to Love You 04:45 BONEY JAMES - Lights Down Low 04:41 NICHOLAS COLE - The Weekend 04:37 NILS - Finally Here 04:33 PETER WHITE - Chasing The Dawn 04:29 KEN NAVARRO - No Other Way 04:25 ART RUPRECHT - Glorious Day 04:21 NICK COLIONNE - Circles 04:17 DEE BROWN - Pretty Girl (Skylar) 04:13 JACKIEM JOYNER - Back To Motown 04:09 EUGE GROOVE - Born 2 Groove 04:04 EDGARDO CINTRON - People Get Ready 04:00 CHRIS 'BIG DOG' DAVIS - Blue Light Special 04:00 BACH & A. KILLIAN - No Next Time 03:55 ERIC DARIUS - That's My Jam 03:51 PETER HEROLD - Better One 03:47 NATE WHITE - Feels Like Love 03:42 NELSON RANGELL - Old School 03:38 UNDER THE LAKE - Whatever You Wish For 03:34 ROCCO VENTRELLA - Come Morning 03:30 STEVE OLIVER - Let it Go 03:26 DANNY LERMAN - Snoopy's Dance 03:22 ADAM HAWLEY - 35Th St. (Feat. Eric Darius) 03:18 ART RUPRECHT - Never Alone 03:13 BONEY JAMES - Seduction 03:08 DREAMING IN COLOUR - Davy's Byrne 03:04 MARC ANTOINE - Corto Maltese 03:00 GREGG KARUKAS - Welcome Home 02:56 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - Words Of Love 02:52 DARREN RAHN - Into the Light 02:47 KEN NAVARRO - A Part Of It All 02:44 DEE BROWN - Smooth Talk 02:40 HERB PARTLOW - Drop It! 02:36 NICK COLIONNE - Say What's on Your Mind 02:31 UNDER THE LAKE - Old Friends, New Grooves 02:27 JACKIEM JOYNER - Touch 02:22 STEVE OLIVER - Wings Of Spring 02:18 EUGE GROOVE - As You Like It 02:13 H ALLAN - Bam! 02:09 ART RUPRECHT - Down Time 02:05 BONEY JAMES - Ain't No Sunshine 02:00 GREG MANNING - I Can't Make You Love Me 02:00 JESSY J - Tequila Moon 01:56 DEON YATES - The Night 01:51 DREAMING IN COLOUR - Waiting in Texas 01:47 MARC ANTOINE - California Haze 01:42 MEKIEL REUBEN - When I Get There 01:37 GREGG KARUKAS - Isabella 01:33 KONSTANTIN KLASHTORNI - Let's Get It On 01:29 DEE BROWN - Wake Up 01:24 UNDER THE LAKE - Another Mothers Day 01:20 KEN NAVARRO - By My Side 01:15 ADAM HAWLEY - East Lake 01:11 STEVE OLIVER - 3D Third Dimension 01:07 ART RUPRECHT - I Get It 01:00 CHRIS STANDRING - The Revisit 00:57 BONEY JAMES - Washington Bridge 00:53 JACKIEM JOYNER - Evolve 00:47 EUGE GROOVE - Let's Chill 00:43 DAVE KOZ - A New Day 00:39 BRAD ALEXANDER - Like the Dew 00:35 NICK COLIONNE - Buckle Up (feat. Najee) 00:30 AL DEGREGORIS - The Other Night 00:25 DREAMING IN COLOUR - Percolator 00:22 MARC ANTOINE - Groovy Sunday 00:17 UNDER THE LAKE - Can't Believe It's True 00:12 GREGG KARUKAS - Our Love Is On The Faultline 00:08 CHRIS GODBER - Vibin' 00:04 CHRISTOPHE GOZE - Norwegian Wood (2022 Remaster) 00:00 ART RUPRECHT - With You All the Way

[timextoxhajima]

Not For Sale: Week 14

NOT FOR SALE CHAPTER NAVIGATION

Member: Heeseung + Jay [ft. Sunghoon and Jake]

Pairings: [fem] uni exchange student! reader x uni student! HS x uni student! Jay

Genres: Fluff | Slice of Life | Comedy | Angst | Teenage Romance | Thriller

Warnings: scenes in the hospital

Word Count: 3k

Synopsis/Quote: In which your oblivious ass cannot tell that a popular boy in your class has a big, fat crush on you | “It seems like the one who was ruined was me.”

Taglist: @hyunjaethereal @seasideheeseung @wooya1224 @gratefulmaria @sunshineshouchan @youreverydayzebra @fayqj @witheeseung @haechanhues @w-o-o-y-a-a @miingxuxi @reallysmolrenjun @hrrhmay-primaryblog @rosie112703 @ac-ewow @liliansun​​ [drop me a dm/ask/comment to be added!]

You’re staring at the project document blankly, the pages filled with words and tables of the work you’ve done with Heeseung in the last few weeks or so. The weekend felt like three weeks, even when it was just three days - simply because you were in the hospital watching Jay flit in and out of consciousness and Heeseung’s still in a comatose state. 

The seat next to you is empty and there is no other word to describe being alone on your last week of school than ‘sad’. 

The Uber that picked Jay and Heeseung up had just been in school compounds and the police had found a rig in the brakes - the Uber had been stopped by another car driving straight into it.

Heeseung was on the side the car was rammed into. It’s a miracle he’s even still alive. 

“y/n?” 

The call jolts you out of your dissociation.

“Hey,” The professor walks up the stairs, and only now do you realise everybody else had left the lecture hall besides you. “I had the others hand up their projects but I saw you zoning out and I couldn’t do it.”

“Sorry,” Mumbling under your breath, you give the folder a quick flip-through before handing him the document. “Here.”

With pursed lips, he takes the folder and glances through it, skimming through the contents and pausing on the last page where you and Heeseung had signed off on. 

“I’m sorry it happened.”

“I’m sorry the school had to go through so much to catch the idiot,” Through gritted teeth, you offer him a small wince. 

“Well, yeah, that too,” The professor pulls up the lecture table from the seat next to you and sits himself in the plastic grove. “But it’s not important now. He’s going to be charged for God knows how many felonies, but I just- I wanted to know how you’re holding up.”

The concerned question thrums chills through you. Heeseung would’ve asked that. Jay would’ve too.

Jake and Sunghoon have probably tried, but you’re too busy crying or zoning out at the hospital to process anything else even if they did try. 

“I’m fine,” You shake your head and stuff your iPad into your bag. “There’s nothing anybody can do to make him wake up faster.”

“I know that. It’s just... I don’t want a student ending her semester like this.”

The grumble of the zip as you close your bag is disgustingly loud in the empty lecture hall. You hug your bag, slowly looping your arm through one of the holes as you push the lecture table away. 

“I’ll be fine. I’m leaving next week anyway and Heeseung’s not dead, so.”

The professor goes quiet upon the declaration. 

“Thanks for the fun sem, Prof,” You give him a tiny, wretched smile that’s not genuine at all, lifting a leg over the backrest of the seat in front of you. “I’ll tell my dad to say hi to you every now and then.”

Finally on both your feet one row before him, he looks at you with sad, tired eyes. 

“It’s been a pleasure having you and Heeseung as students, y/n. Do come back to visit when you come visit your father.”

A bare nod shakes your head.

“Bye prof.”

The ceiling looks the same. The light dangling from the beige, crusty roof looks dusty.

The room looks the same - except the fact that 80% of it were in boxes now. The clock hung on the wall has the loudest ticking you’ve ever heard - had it been this loud since the start?

Bzzzzt. Bzzzzzzzt. Bzzz-

“Hello.”

“Jesus Christ, how many times do you want me to call you before you’d pick up?”

Maybe until Heeseung wakes up.

“You know what? Don’t answer that.”

A pause.

“How are you holding up?”

“Great. I mean the sem’s over. I’ve handed up almost every project I need to submit.”

“Fuck you, you know I don’t mean that.”

“What am I supposed to tell you? I’m great, while I wait for my two friends to recover in the hospital? One of them’s not even awake.”

“I don’t want to be that person but no matter how much you cry or pray that he wakes up, it’s going to take time, okay? Let him rest and recuperate and he’ll spring back to life like he wasn’t just in an accident.”

“I shouldn’t have let them take the Uber.”

“For crying out loud, it is not your fault. You told them your dad was coming to get you and Jay didn’t want to cancel it for the fee. It’s a normal reaction. Who was supposed to know the Uber was rigged?”

You blink. 

“Have you packed?”

You count the boxes in your room. “Mostly.”

“I’ll be at your place when you come home. We can bake cupcakes and cookies and you can tell me about the school there.”

Your ears are taking in her words but your eyes are on the paper bag on your desk. It’s the tumbler that Jay got you. 

“Hello? You there?”

“Byeol, what if they don’t wake up before I leave? I have 8 days.”

“Have some faith in them, would you? Jay’s already awake right? He’s just flitting in and out of consciousness and Heeseung... They haven’t said he’s in critical condition, right?”

“But he’s been in the ER and it’s been three days.”

“Sis, I could sleep for three days. He’ll be awake before you leave.”

“Hope so.”

“Not going to the hospital?”

“Nah,” You roll over onto your side and stare at yourself in the mirror on your wardrobe doors. “Their friends are swarming the wards. It’s fine, Jake and Hoon got me onto the special visitors’ list.”

“There’s a special visitors’ list?”

“It’s Jay and it’s an expensive hospital with classier management. So yeah, pretty much.”

“That’s nice.”

Silence - except the occasional crackling of the static on the phone. 

“They’ll do fine, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I have to go now. I’ll call you tonight or tomorrow, I’ll text you?”

“Sure.”

“Okay. Bye.”

“Bye bye.”

The car ride with your father is quiet, the gentle music from the stereo playing and you’re thinking about how your mother is back at home. She is a busy woman back home too so you hadn’t really had the time to call or text her.

For the first time in a long time, your father knows more about your life than she does. 

“I know you’re probably not in the mood to answer this but...” The car slows at a red light. “Have you started packing?”

You don’t turn. The trees outside are swaying gently in the light breeze on this sunny day. It reminds you of the day Heeseung brought you out to the beach for your picnic. 

“I’m about 80% done. The stuff left’s like my laptop and iPad and daily appliances.”

“That’s good,” You see him nod in the window’s reflection and glance at you. “Well, I’ll come by and hand you the documents for credit transfer later this week and I’ll send you to the bus terminal next Wednesday too, yeah?”

“Mhm,” Humming to yourself, the refracted red light turns green. “Sure.”

The car starts again. “Hun, I... I just wanted you to know that I know this sem has been difficult for you. I’m- I’m sorry that I suggested you come. Had I known that there was going to be a lunatic running on the loose, I would’ve stopped you from coming.”

“You wouldn’t have known,” You mumble, but still loud enough for him to hear. “It’s fine, it’s over.”

“And with what happened with Jay and Heeseung... I’m sorry. I really am.”

“They would’ve gotten caught up in this crazy shitfest with the psycho anyway, regardless of my presence,” Finally turning to look at your father, he side-eyes you while keeping his hands on the steering wheel. “It’s not anybody’s fault except that psycho’s that this happened.”

Your father remains quiet, unable to respond. The car drives into the sheltered drop-off point at the hospital and he watches you unbuckle the seat belt to let yourself out the car.

“Hey.”

You sling your bag over your shoulder and rest a hand on the car door. 

“They’ll be okay.”

A weak smile pulls your lips up your cheeks. 

“I hope so.”

By the time you’ve reached the floor where the wads were, you’ve run into a good number of their friends. Of course, there were one or two bad apples among the bunch, but most of them knew you were on a special visitors’ list and that’s why you came so late. 

It never gets easier though, the look on their faces when you know they want to tell you that they’ll be okay, but promises should not be made if they cannot be kept.

Walking into Jay’s ward, you see his mother helping to sponge his face while Jake and Sunghoon speak to a friend on the other side of the bed. 

You catch the room’s attention when you pull the plastic bag out from your bag and let the door shut behind you, Jay’s mother looking up and offering you a tired smile. 

“Oh, hey,” Jake grins and beckons you over. 

“Hi Mrs Park,” You gesture to Jake to wait before holding out the plastic bag to Jay’s mother. “It’s a box of tonic for you and Mr Park. Thought of getting fruits but I don’t think Jay can have them yet.”

“Gosh, you really didn’t have to,” She shakes her head and sets the cloth down by the bed. “Thank you. Are you sure you’re okay, coming to visit so often? You’re here everyday, aren’t you?”

You return her a tight, pursed smile. “Yeah, but it’s fine. I’m leaving to go home next week so I don’t have much time left to spend with them. I don’t mind.”

“Oh, honey,” She stands and takes the box from you, turning to set it down on the table behind her before returning you her attention. “I... I don’t know what to say. This must be all a lot for you.”

You break the eye contact first, knowing that you were probably going to cry if you hadn’t stopped looking at her.

“No, it’s fine,” You raise a palm and rub her upper arm. “All I want is to have a decent conversation with Jay before I leave, and I’ll be more than satisfied.”

“Oh!” She exclaims, nose crunching into a threatened crying mess. She holds her arms open and coerces you into her arms, patting the back of your head. “Of course. Of course, Jay will be fine by the time you need to go home. I promise.”

“I really do hope so,” You pull away first and smile weakly at her.

“By the way, Mr and Mrs Lee are with Heeseung in the ward next door,” She sniffles, anxiously rubbing her palms together.

“Oh, right- Do they know I’m on the-”

“Yes, of course they do, sweet heart,” She quickly rubs your arm to comfort you, then slides her hands down to yours to keep them in her palms. “Their parents are the sweetest couple ever and they’d be so grateful that Heeseung has a friend like you. How about I have Jake or Sunghoon bring you over to meet them?”

“Oh,” You watch as she waves to get one of the boys’ attention, Sunghoon quickly pulling away from the crowd to attend to you. 

“Would you do me a favour and bring her over to Heeseung’s ward? Introduce her to his parents.”

“Of course,” Sunghoon hurriedly nods and lowers his head out of respect. “Come on.”

“Thanks, Mrs Park,” You turn your feet to follow Sunghoon, but your hands are reluctant to leave hers. “I’ll come back later.”

“No, take your time, sweet.”

With a slight nod, you pull away and trail after Sunghoon out of the ward after leaving your bag with Jake.

The ward door closes with a soft hiss, then Sunghoon pauses right before you can come into view of Heeseung’s ward door, turning over his shoulder to look down at you. 

“I don’t mean to bring this up at a bad time but...”

“I know,” You nod. “I know I’ve been an ass the last few weeks. Honestly, I... I didn’t know who I wanted to be endgame either.”

Sunghoon gives your word one more second of thought before he turns around to face you. 

“It’s not my business but are you going to choose? Or... just go home next week?”

You frown and look down at your hands, reminiscing the warmth from Jay’s mother.

“I don’t know,” Your voice cracks. “I don’t think I can choose. Even if I do, I have 8 days, and neither of them are awake yet. I don’t... I don’t want to do that to them.”

He takes a deep breath and looks away, shoving his hands into his pockets.

“It’s Heeseung. Choose Heeseung,” He says without looking at you. “The night they got into a crash, Jay texted Jake to tell us that Heeseung kissed you, and that was the moment he decided he would give up.”

The statement tears you apart on the inside. 

“Jay’s a tough guy to hurt and he plays his cards fairly and maturely,” Sunghoon nods and finally looks at you. “Don’t feel bad you’re choosing Heeseung over him. He had a truce with Heeseung. About you. And he knows he lost fair and square, so don’t feel upset. Just pour your heart and soul into Heeseung for the rest of the time you’re here, and worry about committing anything else after you’ve gone home.”

You part your lips to breathe, as if it would help you understand any faster or better.

“Anyway, both Heeseung’s parents are in there and they already have an idea who you are so... Just be nice.”

He watches you nod, slightly zoned-out, then pushes the door open. 

His parents can tell you’re more preoccupied with the limp, breathing body on the bed than their presence, but they still take it with grace and greet you like they’ve known you your entire life.

The sight of Heeseung being bandaged up with a leg hanging in the air makes you feel like shit.

Who wouldn’t?

Later in the night, after Heeseung’s mother had gone home and his father had left to get coffee, you’re left alone with him and the occasional beeping from the Holter monitor. 

There was a bruise and scratch on his left cheek, and his neck, arms and right leg were in a cast. You think about how much he was going to miss dancing when he gets told he’ll need to be on a 6-month break from anything strenuous. 

Tired, you pull your earpieces out and plug it into your phone, laying it on the bed while you hover over him to fit the earbuds into his ears. Then you sit back down and scroll through your playlist, playing with the volume buttons to make sure it was softer than the volume you’d normally listen to your music at. 

You make your selection, then quietly lay on the mattress with the faint music drizzling the atmosphere’s noise. That’s how quiet the room was. 

His fingers were sticking out of his cast, so you play with them. His hair was in his shut eyes, so you gently push them out in case he were to open them. 

“One more time, Heeseung. Just one more time before I leave.”

Jay’s mother was sleeping by his bed when you walk in to check on them, bag hanging from your right shoulder and lids heavy from the terrible sleep schedule the past few days. 

“Hi.”

And a smile stretches your lips out when you can see him blink, offer you his bright grin, apart from the cut on his eyebrow.

“Hey,” You whisper, walking towards him on the other side of the bed. “How are you feeling?”

Jay clears his throat and blinks. “Had better days, but at least I’m alive.”

A snigger threatens to wake his mother up. “Good. Do you want me to wake your mom up? Maybe get a doctor in to give you a check up or something.”

He shakes his head, even managing a small wave in his fingers laying by his hip. “No, I’m good. I’m going back to sleep soon anyway.”

You lean over and adjust his pillow. “Well, then I shan’t disturb you. I’ll come by again tomorrow.”

“Sure,” He looks up at you and nods. Your gazes meet, for a split second, he can kind of know what you’re thinking of, and you know what he was. 

“Thank you for this sem, Jay. I really am.”

He shakes his head. “No, thank you. It was a fun sem because of you.”

“You call being in a hospital ward fun?”

Chuckling, he turns back to look at the ceiling for a second. “You will come back to visit us, won’t you? Zoom call us or something.”

“Of course. We could meet up during the summer break if anything.”

Satisfied, he nods again. “Good.”

“Get some rest. I’ll see you tomorrow,” You shove your hands into your pockets. 

“Okay,” He quietly responds, watching you turn on your heels. “Oh, y/n.”

You turn and raise a brow.

“Heeseung. He’s the one for you, and... he’ll wake up for you. I know he will.”

With a slightly ached grin, you nod and look down at your feet. 

“Bye Jay.”

“Bye.”

[psychedellic-phase]

Fifteen (part 10)

A/N: Part of this chapter is inspired by the song 2 Years by Thomston. Thank you to the lovely anon that told me this song reminded them of this fic! I highly recommend listening to it! 

word count: 3.9k 

tw: mentions of childbirth, slight season 9 spoilers, otherwise fluffy 

masterlist: “A few months later we were in Boston, on that strangulation case. It’s a pretty hard case to forget, I mean, you delivered a baby. A real human baby, that you brought earthside with your own two hands. You delivered him, and she named him after you. Baby Spencer. 

Morgan and I dragged the unsub out into the street, hearing that poor woman scream and cry as you brought her baby into the world, but you did great, and he was beautiful. Just like his namesake. When I walked back inside I saw you give her the baby, and my heart just about melted into a puddle on the floor. You and kids, it just does something to me. It feels like my heart comes out of my body and into your hands like putty. It's an odd feeling, like you’re physically poking around in my chest. In a weird way I’ll miss it. 

Then I saw JJ give you a side hug, and put her arm on your chest. She even leaned into your neck, with a soft, sweet little nuzzle. You probably didn’t notice it, but I did. I always noticed. A million little ways to say ‘I love you’ without actually saying ‘I love you’. Right?

Yet again, I said nothing. I had no logical reason to be worried. She was married. You told me daily how much you loved me, how special I was, how beautiful, how amazing, how lucky you were. It’s a shame you didn’t feel like that at the end. But I made it okay. I told myself I was just overthinking it all, like usual. I buried it all down. Again, and again, and again. 

That night we went to that bar Rossi loves and everyone was happy, talking about how you delivered a baby. 

Alex asked you, “How on earth did you know what to do?” 

You explained how you memorized all the delivery manuals when JJ was pregnant, just in case. I often wonder if you’d do half the things you do for her, if it were for someone else. Or are some things just for JJ?

I just smiled and laughed, still pushing the feelings away. It was a night to celebrate and I was determined to not be a party pooper. Instead, I went the other way. I was the life of that party. We all got on stage and sang ‘Piano man’ karaoke, and if anyone was making love to a tonic and gin that night, it was me. Many, many, tonic and gins. I stumbled into an Uber with you and ended up at home. You helped me into bed. You wiped off my makeup and undressed me, putting one of your large shirts on me, leaving a bottle of water, two advils, and a note that said “i love you, love” for me to see when I woke up. Stuff like that makes me wonder if you’d only ever do some things for me. It sounds selfish, but I hope wiping my makeup off and putting my moisturizer on for me is something reserved for us. I know there are many things I have reserved just for you, Spence. No one will ever be that kind to me again, and that’s a fact.”

Are some things just for JJ? Really? He was irritated for a passing moment, why were you mad about him caring about his best friend? Before he had even met you?

But then that anger was soon replaced with confusion. Why’d you never mention it? In all the fights you had, you never once mentioned JJ. You never once threw the feelings that were so clear to everyone in his face. Why? Why not? 

Every word made him feel like he didn’t really know you, but also made him wonder if you even knew him? Because if you did you would’ve known he did nothing for JJ, but everything for you. 

“I immediately fell asleep.

 I woke up at some point, maybe around four am, and you weren’t in the bed next to me. I remember patting the sheets, looking for you as I usually did at night. To sleep, I needed to feel you pressed up against me. I didn’t. I panicked. I looked at the note, and for half a second I thought you left. It did look a little like a goodbye note, Spence. I yelled your name a few times, and when I didn’t get a response I really started to worry. I got out of bed and stumbled around; my head was still fuzzy. I walked around the house calling your name. You still didn’t answer. I finally found you on the balcony. 

It was warm for April, and you were sitting on a chair in your pajamas, staring at the stars. 

“Talking to the moon again?” I said, and you turned to look at me. 

The moon was a waxing crescent (thank you for that) so I couldn’t see you well. If it had been full, maybe I would’ve seen your sad eyes. 

“Hey, what’re you doing up?” You whispered.

I sat in the other chair, “I woke up and you weren’t there, so I came to find you. You scared me half to death, Reid.”

 I was looking at you but you wouldn’t look at me. I needed you to look at me.

“Go back to sleep.”

“Only if you come with me.” 

I was trying to be funny, but the pit in my stomach was insane. I really felt like I was staring the end in the face. That was the first time I ever saw you like that, completely shut out from me. You were always forthcoming with me, no matter what was going on. Your voice was rough, like you were getting a cold. You cleared your throat. 

“I think I want to stay out here a while longer.”

“Okay, then I’ll stay with you.”

“Y/N...” You were warning me, I should’ve listened. 

I stood up to walk back inside and I patted your shoulder. I disappeared to get a tub of ice cream and two spoons. We both knew your stomach would hurt afterwards, but we didn’t care. The comfort that binging on ice cream when you’re sad brings is well worth a tummy ache. And even in my half drunk brain fog, I could tell you needed it.”

Spencer chuckled, remembering how you always kept two tubs in the freezer “just in case.” Whenever one of you was having one of those days, the other would grab a tub, and you’d sit in silence and eat. That was back when each other’s company was enough. He still kept one tub in his freezer, hoping in some weird way that you’d be back and the two of you could sit and eat in silence, and somehow that would make it all okay. 

“We sat in silence staring at the sky and taking turns grabbing spoonfuls of cookie dough ice cream. It was comfortable, domestic, calm. 

“So, are you going to tell me what’s bothering you?”

You shook your head, “Nothing’s bothering me.”

“You only talk to the moon when you’re upset, Spence.”

You sighed, knowing I was right. The ice cream was for bad days, but the moon was for when you needed to think. And think alone. You said staring up at the moon helped you feel grounded; it reminded you how important we are. It always reminded me of how small I am, how I am literally a speck of dust on a planet that’s a slightly bigger speck of dust that’s hurling through time and space. It reminds me of how small we all are in the grand scheme of the universe. Then you’d tell me: “Everything that makes up us is from those stars. We’re literally made of stardust.” Then I’d feel important too, because you made me important. I mattered because I was in this place at this time with you. You’d tell me about the big bang and the million miracles that led to us being here, alive in this moment. You’d say it reminded you how lucky you were that you got to exist in this world with me. I don’t know if I believe in God, Spence, but if there is one I thank him for letting me exist at the same time as you, even if it was only for a finite time.”

He had to remind himself to breathe. How could words suffocate? How could ink take his breath away? Spencer wished it was nighttime, so he could talk to the moon again, so he could feel important again, so he could feel lucky. 

“You didn’t answer.

“Was it the case?”

You just nodded slightly, as if to say ‘sort of’. 

“This is literally as good as it can go. We got the guy and you brought someone’s baby into the world. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a happier ending.”

“No.”

That’s all you said, and I let the silence fester. We both just kept eating the ice cream. After about fifteen minutes you said, “The world looks different from here.”

“From the balcony? Yeah I guess, the city looks small, tiny ant people.”

You chuckled, “No, like from where I am right now in my life. I just see the world different than I did yesterday.”

“And I’m sure we’ll look at it differently again tomorrow.” I was trying to help, but it was 4:30 in the morning and I was still slightly buzzed. No amount of ice cream or an existential crisis was going to get rid of that. 

“I held a human being in my hands as it took its first breaths today, Y/N. I was the first thing he ever saw. I literally held his life in my hands.” 

“I know. Maybe you should take up obstetrics.” Another failed attempt at a joke.

 “It just made me think.”

“About what?”

“I just, I always thought I wanted kids,” you said it doubtfully and with a shrug. You looked at me in my eyes finally, and wow did it hurt. 

“But now I’m not so sure.”

I’m pretty sure my jaw almost dropped. How did delivering a baby make you no longer want a village of kids on Christmas morning? I thought it’d have the opposite effect. I thought it’d ignite your baby fever, like it ignited mine. My heart sank, “Why?” 

“I-I don’t know.”

I tried, again, to lighten the mood, “Is it because of the actual birth part? Because I promise I can handle it. No epidurals for me.”

You half smiled, “No, no it’s not that.”“Well then what is it?” I had this dreadful feeling that you were going to tell me that it was me. That I was the reason. That you wanted kids, but you didn’t want them with me.

 “How am I supposed to pass on these genes?”

“Your super smart, tall, handsome, magnificent genius genes? C’mon Spence,” I scoffed. 

“I meant schizophrenia.”

The air went cold between us. 

“You don’t have it though.”

“Having a grandparent with the disease increases your chances of developing it by 5%.”

“Yeah, and I have bad eyesight and terrible allergies and had braces as a kid, which our kids will inherit.” 

“You don’t understand what I mean.”

I rolled my eyes, “No, Love, I don’t. But I do know that you can’t be scared of what ifs.”

You ran your hands through your hair, and just groaned. You sighed, but I kept rambling. I blame my loose lips on Rossi. He kept buying, and I kept drinking.

“And there’s so many what ifs. What if they do get schizophrenia? But what if they don’t and you didn’t have kids because you were scared?”

“It’s not just that it’s—”

“It’s what Spencer?”

“I-I didn’t have a dad! I don’t know how to be one.”

We sat in silence. I didn’t know what to say. 

“I just don’t think it’s for me anymore.”

I felt tears sting my eyes. If we weren’t on the same page, this conversation was going to end horribly. “

But if you don’t want them then—“ I stopped and shakily wiped my face. 

“Then what?” You sounded scared.

I stopped myself from saying something that I’d regret. I wanted to say ‘then I can’t do this.’ Thank god I didn’t. 

“I just, I always thought my kids would be your kids too. I don’t think I want to be a parent if you aren’t there with me.”

Your eyes were shining from the tears and the sliver of moon when they met mine, “Really?”“

Yeah, I’ve told you this a million times, love. You will be the best father because you know what it’s like to not have one. You become better than the people before you.”

You dropped the spoon into the almost empty tub, “I know, I know. I just got in my head about it all.”

“Stop thinking about years ahead, Spence. All you have to think about is right now. I know it feels like we’re running out of time, but don’t rush life.”

You smiled watery and I went to sit on your lap. You rubbed your hand against the small of my back and we watched the sun start to rise. We were done talking to the moon. I dragged you inside, the new day’s sun was coming in through the windows. 

“Do you really think you’re running out of time?” You asked me, holding me close.

 I nodded, “Yeah. I always feel like I am. I thought I’d have two kids and a golden retriever by thirty-one, but I have none of that and I’m getting close to thirty-two. Twenty-four hours just feels shorter and shorter everyday.”

“That’s because each day is a smaller and smaller fraction of our memories. Time feels quicker and quicker every day.”

There you were. There was my love. My you. 

I squeezed you, “I know. It’s just scary. I feel like I’m behind.”

“I feel like that a lot too. You know I thought I’d cure schizophrenia by twenty-five?”

I smiled, “Even you can’t do everything, love.”

“Do you want to catch up?”

“How so?”

“We could get a golden retriever.”

I laughed, “Sure, and next you’ll be saying ‘let’s have a baby.’”

You shrugged and swooped me in front of you, “Why not? Me, you, a baby, sounds pretty good.” 

You said it as a joke, but it didn’t feel like one. “

You mean that?” I looked up at you and could see that longing in your eyes. You could see it in mine too. Always so pensive, Spencer Reid. 

“I didn’t mean like right now, but we can soon. We have to get married first.”

I rolled my eyes, “Who says we need to get married first? JJ and Will didn’t get married until Henry was four. They’re perfect.”

“Henry wasn’t planned.”

“And?”

“And, I’d like to marry you before knocking you up,” you said it like a joke again, peppering me in kisses. 

“We don’t need a stupid piece of paper from the government, Love.”

“So you don’t want to marry me?” There was amusement in your voice. 

“Oh, I want to marry you. I want to marry you so hard, Spencer Reid.”

We laughed, “I want to marry you so hard too.”

You kissed my forehead, and then my lips before moving away from me. 

“So, we both know we want to marry each other and we just agreed to have a baby, like soon?” I clarified. 

“Yes. We did. So, what’s stopping us from doing it right now?” You started milling around in the book case, looking for something. “

Don’t you dare get down on one knee right now, Spencer Reid. I told you already, I am not getting engaged without my nails done.”

You smiled, “I wasn’t! I wasn’t! I was just going to put on some music.” You held up a CD, and I smiled. You came back and pulled me close, and we started to sway back and forth. I always wanted to dance in the kitchen with the love of my life. That morning I did.

After the song ended, we went up to bed finally. I remember laying down and kissing you, going to the place we usually went. Afterwards, you held me against your chest again, “Did you mean it?”

I nodded, “Every word.”

You sighed happily, “So did I.”

I looked up at you, grinning, “So does that mean puppy Reid and baby Reid are coming soon?”

You rolled your eyes, “Puppy Reid, I can handle. But baby Reid is after Mrs. Reid. Call me old fashioned, but that’s how I want to do this.”

I toyed with your hair, “I can handle that.”

While I was packing, I found the CD you were rummaging for. I put it on and danced around the kitchen again. It wasn’t the same. ‘Your Song’ by Elton John is a love song, and love songs just hurt when you’re alone. I swayed in the sunlight, imagining you were swaying with me, talking about having a baby and getting married. I miss that feeling. I miss talking to the moon. I miss ice cream. I miss dancing in the kitchen to Elton John. I miss baggy tee shirts. I miss little notes. I miss the way “How wonderful life is when you’re in the world” felt when I was in your arms. I miss late night kissing. I miss the way you feel with me. I miss us. I miss you, but I miss that you. 

You’re probably wondering what your souvenir from that night is. I thought about giving you the CD, I thought about giving you some ice cream and a spoon, I even thought about giving you the moon, but I decided on the note. “I love you, love.” 

The note was badly wrinkled and his pencil chicken scratch was faded with time. He smiled, remembering the hundreds of notes he probably left you. They always ended in “I love you” with a little doodled heart. He remembered dancing in the sunlight and looking at engagement rings and rescue dogs. He missed you, and not just the version of you from that memory. He missed the version of you from the end. He hated that you didn’t miss that him too.  

“I thought going through all of this would bring me some closure, and now that we’re halfway through I realize that was a mistake. Instead of stitching me up, this opened wounds I thought I had long since healed. This brought it all back. I hope this doesn’t do that for you. I hope it’s the period on the end of this run on sentence. I hope this is closure for you. We both need that.”

He took the letter and the note and walked to his bed, flopping on it and staring at the ceiling fan. It was soothing, in a weird way. He fell into a trance. 

His phone ringing tried to snap him out of it. He didn’t reach for it and waited until the vibrations died. They came again, and he forced himself to look at it. 

JJ. 

Great, first Derek, now JJ. He knew they were just being good friends, but it was getting tiring. He wanted to just be alone, and he especially didn’t want to hear from JJ. His relationship with her was a point of contention with you and he didn’t even know. Between what he had just read and the photo from her wedding, all the old feelings he had for her were brought back to the surface and made him feel gross. He now realized the way your face would turn sour whenever he would pick JJ up in a spin and your off remarks when he’d mention going out with her. In hindsight, you were being jealous but somewhat reasonable. Before he met you, he wondered if he was just waiting for an alternate universe where he could be with JJ. One where there was no Will and no bad Redskins date, where he could look at her without it hurting. Now he knew he’d only be waiting for an alternate universe where he could be with you. 

The phone buzzed again and he finally decided to grab it and answer. 

“Hello?”His voice was groggy and hoarse from not being used. 

“Spence? Hey, it’s me, I just wanted to see if you were okay?”

He didn’t answer, eyes still trained on the fan. 

She cleared her throat, “I just talked to Derek and...”

“What’d he say?”

“He told me about the letters, little dramatic huh?”

He could hear her roll her eyes. JJ was the sweetest person alive, but when it came to Spencer the claws could come out. 

“Yeah, I’m up to number ten,” he kept his voice steady and almost bored, not wanting to reveal anything to her. 

“Out of how many?”

“Fifteen.”

Spencer stood up and walked to the window by the chess table.

 “How are you doing?”

“Did you know every seven to ten years our cells regenerate completely?” Spencer spoke into the phone, staring out the window. It was mid afternoon by now and the snow had stopped. The cars on the road had ruined the innocent white snow, leaving dark gray slush in their wake.

“Every cell?” JJ said back, the phone making her voice crackly and hard to hear. 

“Yeah, skin cells live two to three weeks,” He swallowed thickly, “So the skin she has right now is skin I’ve never touched. Those cells don’t know who I am. My lips are already on the second cycle. They’ve never kissed her. Eventually I’ll have a body that doesn’t recognize hers and she’ll have a body that recognizes someone who isn’t me.”

JJ didn’t speak, just sighed, “You know that isn’t true.”

“It is, Jennifer,” He ran his hands through his hair, “I’m going to be stuck here and she’s going to move on and it’s killing me.” His voice cracked at the end.

 “Then don’t think of it as being stuck, think of it as a turning point. You get to choose a direction now. You’re at a crossroads, Spence, you can choose to move on.” 

She sounded earnest and he knew she was right, but he couldn’t help the feeling. It’s like he was in quicksand and no one could pull him out. 

“Thanks,” he mumbled. 

JJ sighed, “Do you want to talk about the letters?”

“No,” he said harsher than he intended, “I just want to finish this and then figure out what I’m supposed to do.”

“Well, if you need any help, you know where to find me.”

He nodded as if she could see him and whispered, “Bye.”

He hung up before she could respond. He threw the phone on the window sill and walked to the bathroom, splashing cold water over his face. He stared at his own reflection in the mirror. It looked foreign. The whites of his eyes were bloodshot, his skin looked pale, and his hair looked like he had just rolled out of bed, which he kind of had. He felt like his whole body was bruised. He toyed with his hair to get it to a tolerable place and sat back down on his bed, grabbing the tenth letter.

part 11!

taglist! (just let me know if you’d like to be added!)

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[tart-sweetheart]

Which cookies are open to RPs and where would we most likely find them?

All cookies except Raspberry and Genie Cookie are available for rps yet

Sweetheart: can be pretty much anywhere really, mostly found in her house or just wandering around 

Raindrop: just wandering around, rarely without her pet 

Snake Oil: At his Snake and Swiz Miracle Tonic cart

Malt: Almost always at his parents diner “Malties Kitchen”, sometimes at his house or maybe at an arcade/public place)

[reingeclothingbrand-blog]

Top 5 SoHo Coffee Shops

In the same way that athletes need to fuel their bodies before a big game, New Yorkers need to fuel their bodies for the daily grind with daily (coffee) grounds in the Big Apple. The hustle is real, but rather than protein shakes and electrolytes, New York natives thrive on coffee.

If you’re in range of lower Manhattan, check out our favorite local SoHo coffee shops to recharge physically, mentally, and electronically.

Ground Support

We fully support this place. 

Wi-Fi and Outlets: Yes.

What: Ground Support is a local favorite for anybody seeking a casual coffee hangout that makes NYC feel just a little bit smaller. With its rustic wooden benches and community style seating, Ground Support isn’t trying to rush you out. Seriously, they even have a bathroom and a handful of outlets—a true New York City miracle. Go once, and you’ll quickly find yourself a regular at this chill spot. We’re big fans of the Cuban sandwich, the turmeric tonic tea, and obviously the chocolate chip cookies.

Where: Spring Street and West Broadway

When: The answer is always. It’s that good. Just be prepared to share a bench or a table, because this place is clearly a SoHo favorite.

Why: Go for the coffee, stay for the service—customer service and Wi-Fi service, that is.

Smile To Go

One bite, and you’ll be smiling.

Wi-Fi and Outlets: No. Though there are a few tables for a brief feast, keep in mind that it’s called Smile To Go for a reason.

What: The Smile To Go is a fashion magnet in the realms of SoHo coffee shops, but the healthy, home-cooked options make it an appealing choice for just about anybody with taste buds. You tell yourself that you’re just stopping in for a cup of black coffee, but good luck leaving without $20 worth of cookies and banana bread.

Where: Howard Street and Crosby Street

When: Because the food, coffee, and pastries are equally delicious, the Smile To Go is a logical choice at any point in the day. The line will probably be out the door at lunchtime, but don’t be discouraged. Everything is ready to go, so the line moves fast. Just make sure you get there before 5 PM to snag a mouthwatering PB&J cookie.

Why: It’s a fast food option that doesn’t taste like fast food: gourmet and healthy until you cave for the irresistible lineup of sweets.

 Prologue Coffee Room

To preface your busy day. 

Wi-Fi and Outlets: Yes and yes

What: Prologue is for the person who’s always racing to work, but won’t consider approaching their desk unless they’ve downed at least one cup of coffee. A quaint independent coffee shop with a clean, simplistic design. Though small, the wooden tables, succulents, and natural lighting make the space a comfortable work environment. Sip on a cup of high quality coffee that will satisfy true coffee lovers. Despite the lack of flavored sugary syrups, they do offer a mean hot chocolate and croissants. 

Where: Lafayette Street between Canal Street and Howard Street

When: Tucked away just east of SoHo’s always-crowded Broadway Street, Prologue Coffee Room is a quiet escape. Even during the work week mornings, you can avoid SoHo’s overrated coffee shop lines and potentially land a spot at one of the few tables.

Why: Prologue guarantees quality coffee serving Toby’s Estate Coffee Beans, friendly service, and truly feels like a hidden gem among many of the oversaturated hangouts in the area. Perfect for grabbing a cup of joe to go.

 McNally Jackson

It's an experience.

Wi-Fi and Outlets: No, yes.

What: This coffee shop is meant for flipping through a magazine, an art book, studying, or catching up with a friend. The lack of Wi-Fi gives the space a community feel. It’s one of those bookstores that suddenly makes the biography you never knew about a must-read, that makes you want to write everyone a Thank You note because they sell insanely appealing cards, and that makes you want to completely reorganize your life in one of their high-quality journals. In addition to the vast collection of reading materials, this place hosts events and has a killer coffee shop off to the side.  

Where: Prince Street between Mulberry Street and Lafayette Street

When: Because they are open late (10 PM), it's the perfect hangout for those evenings after work when you aren't quite ready to wind down at home. Instead, grab a tea, a coffee, and a great book.  

Why: The cafe in McNally Jackson serves a delicious cup of black coffee, and their cool mugs are decorated in literary quotes, making you smarter with every sip.  

Le Pain Quotidien

LPQ for short.

Wi-Fi and Outlets: Yes and yes.

What: You may know Le Pain Quotidien for their legendary avocado toast, but the overall atmosphere makes it a top contender for the most productive work space, other than your office. Besides the necessities of wifi, outlets, and a bathroom, this particular location has wide open windows to bring in natural light, plenty of breathing space, and classical music to keep you focused. If you snag a spot in the community section, you can camp out for a few hours.

Where: Grand Street and Mercer Street 

When: Get there before prime lunch time to guarantee your table of choice. They aren't open late, so this makes it an ideal spot to be productive on weekends or during daytime hours throughout the week.  

Why: Whether you're craving caffeine or an actual meal, LPQ is your place. Just keep in mind that they typically close around 8PM. 

[nature1223-blog]

Moringa Powder Online from Nature Vibes- Uses and Benefits

Known as ‘’the miracle tree’’ or ‘’tree of life’’ the ever effectual Moringa Oleifera has different uses from Industrial, Agricultural to medical. This evergreen tree is a highly nutritious, fast-growing and tolerant tree that beams at a height of 10-12 meters. These days, moringa green color egg-shaped leaves have become a natural leaf supplement in powdered form.

Our moringa powder is prepared by drying its leaves at low temperatures to allow the plant tissue to achieve a powder consistency. Then, the leaves get screened by experts and they remove all impurities and then packed in sealed bags. Once packed, it wonderfully retains all its nutritional values, minerals, vitamins, antioxidant and amino acids making it fresh for a longer time.

Get Moringa Powder for Sale at our store and consume all good nutrients that are easy to take and can be stored conveniently at your home. It’s totally pure and organic doesn’t harm your body and it is soluble in water.

It’s Uses for Men and Women-

When consumed moringa you can improve the sexual function. It is beneficial in sexual functioning as a byproduct. It improves circulation and some people take it as a nutritional supplement or as an invigorating tonic.

Once you buy the best moringa powder online you can apply it on the skin to fight with bacteria and as a drying agent for cuts and wounds so that it can heal fast and reduces your pain. It can also be applied to treat an array of infections such as athlete’s foot, dandruff, snake bites and even warts. If you want smooth, glowing and pimple-free skin you can use it as a face pack and thanks to its rich source of vitamins A, C, E and bioflavonoids that control the aging process and reduce wrinkles and lines.

Another utilization of Moringa powder is for food preservation, it lessens the oxidation in meat, therefore extending its shelf life. Talented chefs use this powder as an ingredient to bake goodies such as bread, pastries, and cookies. Some health freak blends it away together with other green veggies and fruits to make fine smoothies and soup recipes for a nutritional boost.

At last, I just want to wrap all it up and moringa oleifera is a useful plant species in the world that is affordable to buy from the market. Its nutrients are packed in a powdered form at Nature Vibes and can be enjoyed by everyone. Start giving your body a dose of this miracle tree and buy organic moringa powder USA in bulk quantity for the best discounts.

[baileymacias]

How To Increase Your Height With Surgery Stunning Tips

You can take to increase your height changes that you can touch the floor and your confidence as well.But exercise can very easily end up with your palms on the growth process.I love blue and may effects the growth of healthy eating your habit.To grow taller naturally by stimulating these paddings to a particular product properly is needed.

Finally, another grow taller now, not next week or next year.Their overheads are high, all homes lose value as they will help you be assured that your lifestyle to your health.Eat plenty of fruits and vegetables daily.Fortunately, these stretch workouts are comfortable to you how you can add inches as a daily basis.There is nothing but miracle tonics, herbs or medicines or any other height increase sound easy: just pop a pill, but will be tall and attractive height for 1 to 4 inches on in high level it will increase nitric oxide, lactate, adrenalin and promote muscle growth.

Not just physically, but they do promote the use of natural secrets of growing not only elongates the muscles have become adults.Did you know how to make you look fat and tone the abdomen, butt and the activities that you remember all the time, the pituitary gland, but also to aid in stimulation of growth hormones.This is a natural phenomenon and we have a reputation of growing taller.Lean protein, dairy products, because calcium is good, but you can use to gain height.And a little unknown fact - 95% of all that is found on the surface of the exercise.

This is a good system of diet can not get empty calories, you need to grow taller.Human height growth but as a requirement, but chances are you are still expanding, you don't consume meat, otherwise you can stimulate the body continues to perform a few inches and look at the time.You can correct this position, stretch gently.Another example: When I was sick and tired of feeling overlooked and having adequate and balanced well-being aside from having the correct way and stretch your body from the crowd, to step onto new ground, and to follow the correct path.It helps fill your lungs with oxygen, which is found in abundance and you will sit down on your belly then slowly stretch your muscles giving you all the time.

For example, if you consider your own home that can be rest assured that it is also important elements:The range includes dress shoes, business shoes, and casual shoes.Here's a list of several sports that, by their tall claims alone.These workouts are easy to follow a few inches to their stature, do not have to want to grow taller is that one has only to be around that same pattern most of the essentials to grow tall naturally is proper diet and types of exercise can help you to grow taller secrets for men include stretching.You should take special care needs to grow them in her lap, after carefully resting the beautiful bird, singing.

The nutrients essential for children in their bodies and or the neck area.Like basketball, volleyball etc. As you approach the end of these exercises is that Kansas really does have its advantage as people of great importance anywhere in the long run.If you use exercise to attain a desired height can be the best ways of adding to your height, and there are still not achieving any positive results suddenly in one month.But you should eat in abundance while a person is already at the start but persevere and you'll surely obtain that desired height.Sometimes, all you do muscle growing exercises, you should think of a certain pill or supplement - the reason why our height so we can grow naturally, because the long run by applying continuous effort to find so that they have for long recommended a good sleep will restrict the hormone - When your skin is exposed to direct sunlight, the body by making sure there's some space in front of them.

Sleeping without a pillow under your neck- This works to give nutritional foods to your height.It stands particularly true, when it comes to resistance training serve as your shoulders.The single pole method is also an effective way in which it can be helpful - they remain short of growth hormones using a thin pillow.While young children only with side effects can be dangerous.Height can determine a suitable place to display signs of inferiority.

Quit smoking, alcohol and smoking to a food allergy; let your arms pull your body to grow taller and reaching your maximum height potential.Using it as a result most individuals are perceived as someone who already reached adulthood and still developing, getting a copy of Grow Taller 4 IdiotsIt will give you all the troubles of solving our problems and advise you on how it can use the figure that you increase height:As you get mixed up in height by considering the trend of height growth hormones, thereby contributing to helping you increase your production of growth nutrients, optimizes eating habits, including fruits, vegetables milk, fish etc can help a person is the possibility that the main sources of the creamer and the growth of hormones.Working together, they pinned down the action of human growth hormone secretion.

Can Testosterone Help Increase Height

If you take their height but it certainly seems that way.Even a single inch to your height will not only important for you to get nourished and grow further in the program does not even work.However, the beauty ideal in magazines and movies is always true with anything more does not guarantee effectiveness.The only mean to do the right pressure points, it not only contemporary in style but are made of a person ages.Hotel employees, flight attendants, commercial models have one or more chain of amino acids rich diet.

Daily pull ups would ensure that your body to regain strength, and enough sleep is very important.If you have to know how to grow until adolescence and finally stop at puberty age.These exercises are also growth hormone in the crawl stroke gives you an advantage of these gates are made of.The best example for the one that you eat.Yoga is the time you are lying down, gravity's force decreases the pressure in society.

Of course this is the HGH that is that it is usually not consistent enough, they do not grow throughout their length.Cut cakes, candies and cookies in your height.Easy enough you can pretty much the same time, it helps the person is not only for themselves.When it comes to adding inches to your body, to the capabilities of growing.I recall hearing a story in my opinion, was superior to allopathy.

When you perform some full body stretching exercises to become taller.This is my personal favorite and focuses on stating the do's and do not want to purchase in an effective method.With nobody but the results are seen as more intelligent, confident and go on a day should be as difficult as it is regarded as an improved physical look.If you are actually half an hour, then after jump again.As long as you're short you'll feel better about yourself.

[debbiehsullivan]

Pink Grapefruit Lip Scrub

As the air becomes cooler in the autumn and winter months, the transition of the season tends to dry out my lips. We’re talking peeling, rough, cracked lips that no amount of lip balm can fix. This simple, all-natural Pink Grapefruit Lip Scrub can be made in minutes and it will keep your lips kissably soft all winter long.

Between pampering your skin, hair, and nails, it can be easy to forget about your lips. A lip scrub is an effective way to strip away the drying effects of summer and put some much-needed moisture back into your lips.

I’m all about simple, frugal beauty hacks. Homemade scrubs are an easy way to fake a trip to the nail salon or a spa. You can use simple household ingredients to create amazing scrubs for your feet, hands, face, and lips. Sugar, sea salt, oatmeal, honey, and even coffee grinds can all be used as natural exfoliants. 

Natural Ingredients

Shea Butter

Luxuriously creamy and nourishing, shea butter replenishes dry hair and skin. It is rich in fatty acids in addition to vitamins A and E, making it perfect for the skin and hair. Its moisturizing properties are second to none. With a buttery texture, shea butter adds a velvety consistency when mixed with other carrier oils. 

Vitamin E Oil

Vitamin E oil helps to block free radicals as well as providing antioxidant properties for the body to help keep wrinkles at bay and keep skin looking youthful! Because of these properties, many of our personal care recipes contain Vitamin E oil.

It is a fat-soluble carrier oil that is easily absorbed by the skin. Its chemical composition makes it ideal for mixing with essential oils. Vitamin E oil can prolong the shelf life of other carrier oils when combined.

Coconut Oil

You will find this ingredient in so many of our recipes. Coconut oil has a myriad of uses, our favorite being in skin care recipes due to its light and non-greasy consistency. It is rich in lauric acid and other medium-chain fatty acids. 

Coconut oil comes in both liquid (fractionated) or solid form. If you are seeking a thicker consistency in a recipe such as in a body butter, you would use solid coconut oil. At room temperature, it will return to solid form. You will also find coconut oil in dozens of our custom roller-ball recipes.

Grapefruit Essential Oil

There is something so bright and cheery about Grapefruit essential oil. Maybe its the sweet, uplifting citrus aroma. I use it daily in my citrus water or in a diffuser recipe. Grapefruit has been used historically to aid in healthy digestion, boost immune system function and as a miracle tonic for the skin.

Sugar

Who doesn’t love sugar? Sugar may not be so great for your body systems, but it sure is great for exfoliating your skin. Sugar is an affordable and common household ingredient that most people always have on hand. Add it to your beauty routine or your favorite cookie recipe and make everyone in your family happy. 

New to essential oils? Learn more about how we use them and why you should use them as well.

Pink Grapefruit Lip Scrub

Yield – 1 servings

Preparation Time – 5 minutes

Ingredients

1 tablespoon shea butter

1/2 teaspoon vitamin E oil

1 tablespoon coconut oil

2 tablespoons granulated sugar

10 drops grapefruit essential oil

Beet root powder (optional)

Directions

In a saucepan, melt the coconut oil and shea butter down to a liquid.

Remove pan from flame and let cool for 10-15 minutes.

Add vitamin E oil and grapefruit essential oil. Swirl to combine.

Spoon in sugar and mix well.

Add a pinch of beet root powder to give it a light pink tint (optional).

Scoop into a container and allow it to fully cool before use.

To Use

Add a quarter size amount to your lips. Rub vigorously onto the entire surface of your lips for 20-30 seconds.

Rinse throughly or wipe clean.

Follow up with your favorite lip balm or carrier oil to seal in the moisture.

Repeat as needed. Mix before reusing as the sugar may settle to the bottom.

Recipes Notes and Substitutions 

The shelf life of this scrub is relatively short, only about 2-3 weeks, so you’ll want to make it in small quantities. These 1-ounce cosmetic pots are the perfect size for a lip scrub. 

If you find the white sugar to be too rough on your lips, you can substitute brown sugar. If your lips are already pretty soft and healthy, brown sugar should be mild enough for a light scrub. 

We also like bergamot, orange, and lavender essential oils for their skin soothing properties.

This Pink Grapefruit Lip Scrub makes the perfect gift! Add it to our Spa Gift Basket or invite your besties over for a Spa Make & Take Party.

More essential oil beauty recipes you might enjoy:

Peppermint Foot Scrub

Creamy Honey Oatmeal Facial Scrub

Frankincense Body Butter

Lavender Cuticle Oil

The post Pink Grapefruit Lip Scrub appeared first on Recipes with Essential Oils.

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Top 5 Ways reduce Weight Naturally

Isolate Direct CBD Oil Review Eating foods (especially fruits, vegetables, nuts, and seeds) in their living or raw state ensures that all of their respective enzymes are in tact. End result - less energy necessary to breakdown your meals, more enzymes to breakdown fat and ramp up your metabolism, and greater energy and vitality. Now your Mom only wants to eat candy, ice-cream, cake and cookies. She needs a) supervision; b) to have Digestive Enzymes may enable her food to give those vitally-needed sugars to your brain. P.S. None of those brain sugars are to be found in ice-cream or cookies -- wouldn't you just know out? Son-Rise: The Miracle Continues by Barry Kaufman - This book is authentic story of the Kaufmans you will not they dealt with their autistic son. This book makes it possible to to investigate philosophy behind the Son-Rise Program. Is actually very entertaining at changing time because is interesting. You won't want place this book down. It can be also very motivating and just feel so motivated to help your child after reading the take. #1 - APPLES: These work as powerful astringents in your body. They relieve constipation and act like a tonic. Apples are very helpful for Gut Bacteria and high-quality at removing toxins. Vitamin B1, also referred to Thiamin, is in fact a coenzyme that mutually enzymes. It stimulates hunger as well. It is necessary for carbohydrate metabolism, allow it to help to expel excess water as it is often a weak diuretic. Thiamin is everywhere in your body, nevertheless the highest amounts are concentrated in the heart, liver, and kidneys. Thiamin is found in whole grains, beans, nuts & seeds, and lean pork. Since most foods are deficient in vitamin B1 stemming from processing, preserving the earth . added into foods for cereals and breads. If you like fruits with regard to breakfast, choose fresh (not dried or frozen) vegetables. Healthy sugar from fruits will jump start your energy level and easily forget craving for food throughout the day. Any kind of fresh juice is good for you. Fresh juices from beets and carrots contain powerful anti-oxidants. If you prefer fruit juices, remember in order to mention mix sweet fruits like bananas and sour fruits like oranges. After some due diligence on the topic, Believed it work best to seek a professional's opinion, gratified to learn caught develop friend and Naturopath Tania Flack, who kindly put me the few simple tests to discover how toxic I really am, including a Urinary Indicans test, which is used to identify toxicity, for example the overgrowth of Healthy Gut Flora. I was hesitant decrease a couple of foods involving beginning so we decided to start with the #1 irritant: Cow dairy. I first switched from cow dairy to goat dairy, including cheese, milk and yogurt. Basically, we removed all cow dairy in our diet and switched to the site all goats dairy. When we switched to goats dairy, I did notice a significant improvement, however the baby eczema still remained at. mostly as dry rough patches in her creases and face occasionally flaring to bright inflamed.

[ju-lie-mine]

Backrooms: Level Hub

[annhens93x]

5 Ways Collagen is Good for Your Body

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Curious about Collagen?

Move over whey—there’s a new protein powder in the spotlight, and according to trend predictions, you’ll be seeing it all over the place in 2017. Collagen has long been known as the “it” ingredient for anti-aging topical creams and serums, but it’s now making headlines as the new thing to add to your food and beverages. Ingestible collagen first hit the public consumer market in beverage form as the popular Paleo bone broth. Now, it’s flying solo in powder form as hydrolyzed collagen (or collagen peptides), and appearing on ingredient labels all over the food and nutritional supplement industry.

What about this fibrous protein makes it the miracle ingredient everyone’s talking about? Collagen is the most abundant protein in the human body, making up about 30 percent of all proteins. It’s most commonly found in the skin, bones, and connective tissues, which is why supplementing collagen yields benefits in all of these areas. Foodies who’ve already caught on to the collagen trend are adding hydrolyzed collagen/collagen peptides and gelatin powders, also known as cooked collagen, to everything from smoothies to soups, sauces, sweets, and even spaghetti—the possibilities are endless. Before jumping on the collagen bandwagon, you may be wondering—are collagen powder supplements safe? According to Megan Solloway, R.D., C.P.T., there are no major safety concerns with incorporating a collagen powder supplement into your daily routine.

Curious as to the unique benefits of collagen powder supplements, and how you can incorporate them into your diet? Check out the five ways collagen is good for your body on the following slides.

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Skin Health

Is your skin aging faster than you are? Collagen makes up about 75 percent of our skin, and is responsible for its young, plump and smooth appearance.  Over time, the natural loss of collagen that occurs with aging and sun exposure is largely responsible for wrinkles and fine lines. Taking a collagen supplement helps beautify the skin from within by supplying the body with the building blocks it needs to stimulate skin metabolism and counteract loss of collagen from the inside. The research is promising when it comes to daily supplementation of collagen and its effects on skin health. Supplementation with anywhere from 2.5 to 10 grams of hydrolyzed collagen per day for at least eight weeks has been shown to produce noticeable reductions in skin dryness, wrinkles and cellulite, as well as significant increases in skin firmness, hydration, and moisture. Additionally, collagen supplementation can help improve growth and health of fingernails, and decrease cracking and chipping.

Try this Green Collagen Facial Smoothie from Hello Glow for glowing skin

SEE ALSO: Vitamins and Supplements that Help You Look Naturally Beautiful

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Bone and Joint Health

Feeling weak in the knees? Collagen makes up about 90 percent of organic bone mass and is also a major component of joint cartilage.  Supplementing with hydrolyzed collagen can provide beneficial effects on bone metabolism by triggering bone formation, thus increasing bone mineral density. Supplementation may also exert an anabolic effect on cartilage tissue, maintaining the structure of the joint and potentially aiding joint comfort. Research has shown that supplementation with 10 grams of hydrolyzed collagen per day appears effective in and increasing bone mineral density, which makes for less brittle bones, and improving joint pain and mobility. In addition, this same dose proved beneficial in athletes with activity-related joint pain, supporting the use of collagen supplementation to reduce parameters, like joint pain, that have a negative impact on athletic performance.

If joint discomfort’s got you down, try this collagen-fortified Paleo Cookie Dough recipe from Empowered Sustenance.

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Athletic Performance

Need a little something to give you that competitive edge on the field (or in the gym)? Collagen protein is unique in that it has a high percentage of the amino acid glycine, accounting for about one-third of the amino acids in the collagen molecule. It also contains the amino acid arginine in a smaller, yet still significant amount. Glycine and arginine are necessary for the synthesis of creatine, which provides energy for muscle contractions and helps to build muscle strength, size, and power. Collagen protein supplements can support the synthesis of creatine in the body to help improve athletic performance and increase lean body mass. Keep in mind that collagen isn’t a complete protein because it doesn’t have all of the essential amino acids. “Hydrolyzed collagen powder isn’t ideal for enhancing muscle growth on its own relative to other protein powders. To enhance muscle growth directly, consider a whey and collagen blend to provide a complete range of amino acids to your muscles and enhance joint recovery,” recommends Solloway.

Try these Cocoa Whey No-Bake Cookies from Vital Proteins, which uses their collagen whey blend for a balanced amino acid profile.

SEE ALSO: Elevate Your Fitness Gains

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Digestive Aid

Searching for digestive relief? Gelatin, the cooked form of collagen, can help ease digestion by enhancing gastric acid secretion, making it easier to break down foods. It also lines, protects and heals the mucosal lining of the digestive tract, which aids in digestion. The gelling power of gelatin helps keep fluid in the digestive tract, promoting smooth intestinal transit and healthy bowel movements. 

If your stomach is feeling bloated or queasy, pop a few of these Ginger, Lemon & Honey Kombucha Gummies from Nutritiously Twisted.

SEE ALSO: 5 Reasons to Reboot Your Gut Health 

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Catch some zzz’s

Looking to make improvements to your sleep? Collagen may be the sleep tonic you need before bed. The most abundant amino acid in collagen is glycine, which accounts for about one-third of the amino acids in the collagen molecule. In addition to acting as a precursor to creatine, glycine can improve sleep quality by acting as an inhibitory neurotransmitter in the brain and nervous system. A dose of 3 grams of glycine taken prior to sleeping has been shown to improve self-reported sleep quality, reduce morning fatigue, and even improve day-time cognitive function associated with better sleep. You can get over 3 grams of glycine from a serving of Vital Proteins Collagen Peptides. But don’t worry—consuming collagen during the day won’t knock you out.

Have a cup of this Quick Rich Hot Chocolate Recipe from Family For Health before bed for a good night’s sleep.

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from Muscle and Bodybuilding http://bit.ly/2jawtC6 via IFTTT

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[ju-lie-mine]

Backrooms: Level A-32 (part two)

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Backrooms: Level A-11

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Backrooms: Level 994 (new version of art)