#more generally it's really funny when people are mad that i (or others) like fjord or orym (for example)

[utilitycaster]

Three other thoughts:

Finally getting around to rewatching the fight. Orym hits Laudna four times. Three are without seeing who it is (she drops Darkness after the third hit, only because she loses concentration). The fourth is after he attempts to take the sword with Grasping Vine (would not deal damage) and Laudna counterspells it. He attacks Laudna once knowingly and only after attempting an option that would not be an attack, and the main goal is disarmament.

In talking warlock comparisons I really do feel like some people do not split "I enjoy this character's choices as a character in the story being told," "I think this character is morally right in their choices," and "I understand why this character is making these choices." Like, to be clear, Fjord is my favorite character. I think if he'd unsealed Uk'otoa during Campaign 2, it would have been narratively fantastic, extremely understandable, and also like, a really bad thing to do. Similarly, this was a banger choice from Marisha to do as Laudna, and I understand where she's coming from, but yeah it's not morally defensible. My comparisons between Laudna and Fjord have always been "if you have an evil patron telling you to do bad things you have to either actively lean in or actively lean out for the story to be good," and personally I do not actually care if the character makes morally good or bad decisions. I happen to think Orym has pretty consistently been morally in the right, but a big part of why I like him is that Liam made a guy whose whole thing is Trying To Do Good By Those He Lost and so this ties in narratively as well. As I said about villain stans, I don't care if you stan villains; I start minding if you do so by trying to twist the story into a pretzel by deliberately (or through stupidity, to be fair) treating them as the good guy.

it continues to be the funniest shit when the no-brains anti-god squad sees literally any character go "I don't much care for the gods personally" and be like SEE THE BAD GUYS ARE THE VANGUARD AND IMPERIUM ONLY even though it's quite a leap from "I don't care about this group" to "they should be annihilated" and then when one of the gods sends a sign to a member of Bells Hells and is like "hi, you're doing great" they're either like well the god didn't show up to the party member I care about so this doesn't matter, or simply do not at any point address it.

[teacup-of-candlelight]

Fjord and that soul-crushing kind of jealousy

This was written late at night and could be considered reachy based off body language and facial expression analysis so if your not down for that, swim along!

We were all expecting jealousies of one kind or another to surface at Traveler Con, we’d been theorizing for a good long while about it! And while we did get some of the normal stuff we had been looking for, (Caleb and Artagan one-upping each other with magic, Fjord being super eager for Beau to go back to talking about Yasha instead of Jester, etc) the jealousy we got to see from Fjord in relation to the Traveler was an entirely different type jealousy that I think shows just how deep Fjord’s feelings for Jester may really be.

We’ve seen Fjord be Petty-Jealous in the past towards Artagan (“He’s not That handsome. You must just be attracted to mystery or something.”) and it was generally pretty funny and not very serious. But during the Bjreaus convo we got to see a Fjord who’s jealousy was more... disturbed by others having feelings for Jester. This sweet dense 7 wisdom boi had no idea that he wasn’t the only one with feelings for Jester much less his best friend and traveling companions. So when he first hears this from Beau, he has a very emphatic “WHAt” moment (which ngl was hilarious) and then seems to be disturbed by this new information until Beau explains it, and to an extent her own past crush on Jester, away to calm him down. That seems to be a little more than your average jealousy to me.

But they continued their conversation and came to this very important part y’all gotta remember for when I hit the actual point of this meta in a sec: He admits that he doesn’t know if Jester still likes him or not, that he’s afraid to tell her how he feels in case her feelings have changed, and that most of all he doesn’t want to be rejected by her because he likes feeling the way he does now. Fjord enjoys being the only person (as far as he’s aware) who just gets butterflies over every little thing she does, and making jokes and fjlirting(?) with his crush who Might like him back. That’s probably a feeling a lot of us can relate to. That exiting and comfortable place where our crush really might like us, that bubble of ignorant bliss that Fjord is hesitant to pop. Because it’s possible that the truth could be worse than living in a hopeful world of unknowns.

But then Jester is getting pulled up into the air as she clings to the Traveler, and Fjord teleports to her, begging her to let go, because among other things, he doesn't want to lose her. The celestial keeps asking Jester questions about Artagan and why she’s doing all that she is for him and then she finally says it- “Because I love him..!”  And Fjord’s face just... falls.

It almost looks like Travis stops breathing for a second, then he very slowly just, looks down, and he does that for a while. Where he had been worried for Jester but excited to be playing (because c’mon Travis loves it when crazy stuff happens) there is a sudden shift to far away down cast looks, and a strange seriousness I can only describe as forlorn. It’s not the face of “Oh crap my best friend likes my crush!” but the face of someone who just felt the small cruel knife of “the girl I love just said she loves someone else” enter his heart. Now, WE know that Jester didn’t mean it that way, and idk if Fjord takes a second to think about it he’ll see that she meant that she loves Arty in a deep friendship or familial way, but love makes people do and think crazy stuff! And sometimes no matter how hard we think ourselves out of our feels hearing it still hurts. And he keeps having a similar reaction after every time her love for Artagan is mentioned. Even when Matt describes Artagan’s tear- Travis gives a silent sigh and looks upward with that kinda expression that says “oof well dang”. Travis isn’t usually the kind to look detached and introspective and- miffed?- while other things are going on, that’s something we would more expect from Caleb, but that’s what Travis was giving us for Fjord.

I could go on and on listing a ton of examples but I won’t bore y’all with that, lol. The point is, when Fjord heard Jester say she loved Artagan in what ever that love looks like, he felt the deep, and I guess about as unselfish as as it ever can be, type of jealousy. The kind that doesn’t get mad, or fights back by showing off or anything, but the soul crushing kind that just heard Jester say that she loved someone and it wasn’t Fjord. Fjord who already believes he is worthy of Jester’s love. One of the core attributes of Fjord’s love for Jester is how unselfish it is, that he just wants the best for her, and he will support her in whatever she wants. But it can hurt so so bad feeling like you’re not the one someone wants, even if for a moment.

And I think that just says soooo much about how serious his feelings are for her.

[loquaciousquark]

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E73 (Aug. 6, 2019)

Gooooooood evening good evening good evening all! @eponymous-rose is off packing for a cross-country move (as if THAT’S an excuse), so here I am isntead to lay waste to all you love. 

Tonight’s preroll: Sam’s costume from the liveshow getting dunked in acid.

Tonight’s guests: Laura Bailey & Sam Riegel, in a fully human and normal tshirt and jeans. Everyone oohs and ahs over Laura’s adorable live show outfit; Sam waits eagerly for equal attention. And waits, and waits...

Tonight’s announcements: Huge thanks to everyone who came out to the live show in Indy last weekend (I was there! It was great!). Laura talks about everyone singing the theme on the intro. Sam sent his entire costume back with Dani so he wouldn’t get stopped in the airport. Poor Dani! Season 3 of Between the Sheets, featuring Amanda Palmer, is up for Twitch subs now and will be up on YT on Wednesday. CR is headed to Austin, TX, for a live show on Sept. 23! Everyone talks about how Doty will definitely, definitely be in this show: The Adventures of the Darrington Brigade, ft. the return of Sam as Taryon. Sam says he already has something in mind for his costume; everyone else will be playing new characters. Laura’s got an idea for a backup character for Jester, but BWF advises her not to use this for the live show since Jester will def be dead in less than 20 episodes. Go to critrole.com/events for more.

Episode 73: Uthodurn, which is not spelled at all like I thought

CR Stats! Nott dealt 124 damage this episode, only 23 of which was friendly fire. Sam: “You know, he just needs to get out of the fucking way.” Nott rolled her 50th nat 20, resulting in a 43 stealth check. Laura and Sam quietly talk about Sam’s tendency to touch everyone else’s dice as opposed to his “playing fairly.” Sam also laments he’s lost his dustbuster in the studio somewhere after the last bit. Jester is tied with Beau at 9 for the most HDYWTDTs. Jester also played her 50th prank this episode: creating the ballpeen hammer as an offering to the Allhammer.

Laura thinks part of Jester’s new anger in battle is part of losing Yasha, especially when she disappeared right in front of her and Jester wasn’t able to help her at all. “Jester mammoth-raged.” Laura raves about being a mammoth & talks about needing to work on her elephant noise. Both Laura and Sam fail miserably at making the noise.

Sam slowly drinks a shot. It’s... a thing.

We have a close-up of Sam’s nail polish, which was done for the live show. He doesn’t own nail polish remover, it turns out.

Nott will talk to Cad about the explosive arrow whenever Cad brings it up. First, Cad was invisible & therefore at fault because he couldn’t be seen; the second part of the blame goes to Laura Bailey, who leaned over and told Sam right before his turn he had to kill this thing right now. The explosive arrow was the best thing he had; Sam accepts one part of the blame for forgetting it would be fire. Sam & Laura agree the bolt should have had some thunder/force damage associated with it because of the concussive blast. (Hilariously, my father presented this precise argument to me with GREAT VIGOR right after this episode aired.)

Jester’s call to the Traveler was just in the heat of the moment. All of her power comes from him, so Jester calls out to him (and Laura thinks it cool) when she gets a big oomph. Sam wonders aloud if her powers genuinely come from the Traveler or not. Laura: “I mean...as far as she knows.” Sam’s also distracted that the question card had a straight-up name on it rather than a username.

Sam considers the outcome of the election a win, since he’s one of the bi-Presidents of D&D Beyond until further notice. “It doesn’t matter how you get there, as long as you get there.” Laura asks if he thinks about it being a hollow win when he goes to sleep. Sam: “Do I look like the kind of person to have thoughts as I’m falling asleep?”

Nott’s usage of the pistol’s single shot was pure pettiness. Sam thought Nott had a shot because she’s acrobatic & fast & has some tricks, and he just didn’t want Beau to win. Making loud noises & drawing attention didn’t even cross my mind.

Jester was very proud of Fjord making those strength checks, but she wasn’t surprised. “He’s very strong, even though he looks like he’s not.” Laura thinks it’s funny and poetic that Travis rolled so well after ditching his sword/powers.

Travis has three sets of dice. Liam has a bunch of sets, but they’re all red (says Laura, offended). Laura only used purple dice at the live show because of how she was dressed.

Cosplay of the Week: a great Scanlan cosplay with Ioun’s third eye by @cxptaingrayson.

Sam realizes something that’s been holding back the Nott-Fjord relationship is that Nott has always been a little suspicious of Fjord. Now that he’s “talking like a real weirdo” and is still brave, braver than before, she can trust him more.

Laura’s asked about Jester’s conflict between healing & DPS. Laura: “Do you think Jester asked to be a fucking healer?” When they were deciding their characters, Laura was originally going to be a warlock with the Traveler as her patron; then Travis was like, warlock! What a cool class! Can I have it? And Laura said sure, she’ll be a cleric, that sounds cool. “And now he got rid of his fucking patron! Who knows if he’s going to be a warlock anymore? What a waste of a warlock!” She likes being a cleric--but even from Jester’s very first inception she’s always been a healer who hates healing. Brian: “She’s a battle Mercy.” She’s not regretful she healed Beau; the reason Laura didn’t immediately heal her is that she thought from Matt’s face that the remorhaz was very close to death, closer than it actually was. She confirms Jester is Chaotic Neutral.

Brian tells Laura he texted Travis to tell him Laura accused him of stealing the warlock class. Laura: “YOU DID NOT!” Brian: “You said it on the air!!”

Travis, via text to BWF, apparently in all caps: “I WAS CHANGING RONIN. YES I STOLE WARLOCK.”

Nott’s teasing of a powerless Fjord is 100% just because she thinks it’s funny. Sam: “There’s not really a deep reason to it. They tease each other all the time. Why would that change just because he tossed his sword in the lava?”

Laura needs to do research on other animals she can become since she enjoyed the mammoth (and giant eagle) so much. Sam keeps a list of flying creatures Laura can turn into because Laura struggles looking it up and often keys it into her D&D Beyond app before she’s even started. BWF: “This is uncharacteristically unselfish.” Sam: “Well, Laura is--I love her. Laura is pure harp music and I would do anything for her.”

Their environments are just getting better and better for Nott in terms of how goblins are seen. She’s given up the mask now, but it’s nice to have people look and not scream.

Both Sam & Laura pause to fan over the design of Uthodurn. It’s way cooler than either the Empire or Dynasty to them right now.

Laura points out that Nott has been fairly outgoing lately; it’s been a while since anyone said “you’re a goblin, stone her!” She’s beginning to come out of her shell as she gets used to her body (not that she likes it in any way), but it’s a development from Veth’s original shyness. She’s also drunk a lot; Sam says this will continue until he gets more Laura Bailey speeches.

BWF still has Laura’s copy of Game of Thrones, which he borrowed in 2011. Laura doesn’t listen to books on tape because she likes the inflections in her own head.

Fanart of the Week: a cool grouping of portraits of the M9 by @dylanbydoodles.

They apparently threw an election party after the D&D Beyond President reveal. Sam talks about convincing the Lyft driver on the way back that it was a swinger’s party in the most ridiculous way possible. Poor Indianapolis.

Nott & Veth’s relationship is getting very complicated. Sam says they’re beginning to blend a little together, but he’s now coming to realize there’s a part of Nott deep down that is deeply scared of going back to Veth & losing her rogue abilities, her adventuring; she wants to be herself again for sure, since her body is definitely wrong, but she’s beginning to fear the loss of some of what Nott is now.

BWF sincerely thanks Sam for the effort and thought he puts into his character. Sam sincerely thanks him. It’s a lovely moment.

Jester’s slip about Fjord’s powers was deliberate on Laura’s part but accidental on Jester’s. Everyone’s a little worried about Fjord without powers, even though he proved himself in the remorhaz fight. She thinks the slipup happened because Jester wasn’t on guard--because Fjord had done so well in the fight, she’d forgotten.

So far, Nott’s choice to leave the family behind in Nicodranus is worth it; no one’s died and they’re making headway on their goals.

BWF: “The Mighty Nein: no one’s died-ish.”

Apparently Matt owns the building they’re filming in? I missed part of this and genuinely can’t tell if it’s a joke.

BWF talks about how Liam, Matt, & Travis have all been genuinely mad at him before. Matt and Travis were mad; Liam was just disappointed.

How did Sam lose the election? He doesn’t think it’s because of him or anything he did. He thinks there’s a demographic shift in America; the electoral college hurt him; both he and Liam ran the campaigns they wanted. Liam’s was serious issues & serious passion, while Sam farted around for three months. BWF asked Adam Bradford at D&D Beyond, who’s the General Manager, about the results; apparently the pie chart was VASTLY in favor of Liam with only the tiniest sliver for Sam. Laura thinks it’s because Sam’s done nothing but troll Sam for five years and this was their chance to troll him back. Sam: “To that I say: good job.”

Dani & Max both voted for Sam. Laura didn’t vote. BWF voted for Liam. Chris forgot there was a vote. Zach voted for Liam.

Sam talks about the game they play, the app for D&D Beyond, and how the whole campaign allowed him to shine a spotlight on himself. “I didn’t get as many votes as Liam, but I got a lot of attention.”

Everyone loved this last live show. Laura legit loved wearing her dress; Travis & Liam looked great. Tal looked normal. Brian marvels at his own tattoos. He and Tal went through a lot of ideas before they committed to the bag situation--he sent it to Jaimie Alexander before the show happened so she could vet it. Ha! “Her response was 25 crying emojis and ‘please send this to my boyfriend.’“

Reminder: Mica Burton, Overwatch League host (and daughter of Levar Burton), will be guest-starring on Critical Role this coming Thursday.

And we’re out! Is it Thursday yet?

[teacup-of-candlelight]

Fjord and that soul-crushing kind of jealousy

This was written late at night and could be considered reachy based off body language and facial expression analysis so if your not down for that, swim along! 

We were all expecting jealousies of one kind or another to surface at Traveler Con, we’d been theorizing for a good long while about it! And while we did get some of the normal stuff we had been looking for, (Caleb and Artagan one-upping each other with magic, Fjord being super eager for Beau to go back to talking about Yasha instead of Jester, etc) the jealousy we got to see from Fjord in relation to the Traveler was an entirely different type jealousy that I think shows just how deep Fjord’s feelings for Jester may really be. 

We’ve seen Fjord be Petty-Jealous in the past towards Artagan (“He’s not That handsome. You must just be attracted to mystery or something.”) and it was generally pretty funny and not very serious. But during the Bjreaus convo we got to see a Fjord who’s jealousy was more... disturbed by others having feelings for Jester. This sweet dense 7 wisdom boi had no idea that he wasn’t the only one with feelings for Jester much less his best friend and traveling companions. So when he first hears this from Beau, he has a very emphatic “WHAt” moment (which ngl was hilarious) and then seems to be disturbed by this new information until Beau explains it, and to an extent her own past crush on Jester, away to calm him down. That seems to be a little more than your average jealousy to me. 

But they continued their conversation and came to this very important part y’all gotta remember for when I hit the actual point of this meta in a sec: He admits that he doesn’t know if Jester still likes him or not, that he’s afraid to tell her how he feels in case her feelings have changed, and that most of all he doesn’t want to be rejected by her because he likes feeling the way he does now. Fjord enjoys being the only person (as far as he’s aware) who just gets butterflies over every little thing she does, and making jokes and fjlirting(?) with his crush who Might like him back. That’s probably a feeling a lot of us can relate to. That exiting and comfortable place where our crush really might like us, that bubble of ignorant bliss that Fjord is hesitant to pop. Because it’s possible that the truth could be worse than living in a hopeful world of unknowns. 

But then Jester is getting pulled up into the air as she clings to the Traveler, and Fjord teleports to her, begging her to let go, because among other things, he doesn't want to lose her. The celestial keeps asking Jester questions about Artagan and why she’s doing all that she is for him and then she finally says it- “Because I love him..!”  And Fjord’s face just... falls. 

It almost looks like Travis stops breathing for a second, then he very slowly just, looks down, and he does that for a while. Where he had been worried for Jester but excited to be playing (because c’mon Travis loves it when crazy stuff happens) there is a sudden shift to far away down cast looks, and a strange seriousness I can only describe as forlorn. It’s not the face of “Oh crap my best friend likes my crush!” but the face of someone who just felt the small cruel knife of “the girl I love just said she loves someone else” enter his heart. Now, WE know that Jester didn’t mean it that way, and idk if Fjord takes a second to think about it he’ll see that she meant that she loves Arty in a deep friendship or familial way, but love makes people do and think crazy stuff! And sometimes no matter how hard we think ourselves out of our feels hearing it still hurts. And he keeps having a similar reaction after every time her love for Artagan is mentioned. Even when Matt describes Artagan’s tear- Travis gives a silent sigh and looks upward with that kinda expression that says “oof well dang”. Travis isn’t usually the kind to look detached and introspective and- miffed?- while other things are going on, that’s something we would more expect from Caleb, but that’s what Travis was giving us for Fjord. 

I could go on and on listing a ton of examples but I won’t bore y’all with that, lol. The point is, when Fjord heard Jester say she loved Artagan in what ever that love looks like, he felt the deep, and I guess about as unselfish as as it ever can be, type of jealousy. The kind that doesn’t get mad, or fights back by showing off or anything, but the soul crushing kind that just heard Jester say that she loved someone and it wasn’t Fjord. Fjord who already believes he is worthy of Jester’s love. One of the core attributes of Fjord’s love for Jester is how unselfish it is, that he just wants the best for her, and he will support her in whatever she wants. But it can hurt so so bad feeling like you’re not the one someone wants, even if for a moment. 

And I think that just says soooo much about how serious his feelings are for her.