#mostly because the state is doing a nice kickback

[whateverthebeeswant]

How The FUCK Do You Mistake Your Glock For A Taser: A Crash Course In Gun Anatomy

Ok listen up ladies and motherfuckers ‘cause I’m about to learn you on why anyone who says that they mistook a Glock for a taser is a fucking idiot. I’d like to dedicate this to the stupid fucking Republicans who, although they love talking about guns apparently don’t know a damn thing about how they work.

Warning: This post contains screenshots from the bodycam footage of the murder of Daunte Wright. The only objects shown in these screenshots are a gun and a taser; I have cropped Mr. Wright out of the image and there is no graphic content.

How the FUCK do you mistake a Glock for a Taser, Lesson 1: Basic Fucking Eyesight

 [IMAGE 1: Left photo from this NYT article shows the Glock 17 model and the Taser X26P beside each other. The Glock 17 has a longer grip, is darker colored, and is more rectangular. The X26P is bright yellow and has a curved grip and trigger space. Right photo from the bodycam footage video linked beneath the cut, timestamp 1:24, shows a fellow cop with a yellow taser similar to the X26P.]

Look at the pretty colors. Now listen to me very carefully, Blue Lives Matter: yellow is the color of the sun and also this taser. The Glock is the fucking black one.

Lesson 2: Basic fucking touch

Now, let’s say you can’t see. Well, even if it’s not color coded and you’re either blind or stuck in a cave and can’t see your hand from your face, that shouldn’t matter.

Humans are incredible in the animal kingdom because we have an extraordinarily developed sense of touch. Some researchers have proven that humans can feel the difference between a level of molecules.

Which is why it is so incredibly fucking stupid that Potter allegedly didn’t realize that she was holding a gun.

Look at the basic differences in the shapes, the grips, the trigger. I’m pretty sure the outside is made out of plastic or some other lightweight, matte substance. Grabbing a Glock instead of a pistol should be like reaching in your backpack for a pencil and grabbing a banana. And that’s ot even factoring in the weight.

Lesson 3: Guns are fucking heavy

If you’ve never shot a gun, then you might not realize how heavy they are. Hell, I can shoot a lightweight pistol and my arms will still be sore. This is partially because I’m a twink, but mostly because when you hold a chunk of metal for an extended period of time your arms get tired.

Although the NYT article I stole that picture from states that although the exact model Potter is holding is unknown, standard issue for the department are the Glock 17, 22, and 26 Models.

([MAGE 2: The Glock 17, 19, and 26 Models side by side (source) with a screenshot of Potter’s weapon from the body came footage (timestamps 1:30 and 1:31 in the video linked below). The Glock 17 is larger than the 19, which is larger than the 26. The body cam footage shows a gun that resembles either the 17 or the 19. Potter is holding her gun in a loose grip. A caption says Do not hold your fucking gun like this. You are not tomb raider”.]

Now, unless Potter has a rare condition where her hands did not grow past the age of 6, there’s no way that the grip of that gun belongs to a Glock 26 (yes, there could be another grip on it, but I digress). To me, it looks like a Glock 17 because of the length of the grip, but I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not an expert on Glock models.

So let’s say it is the lighter of the two, the 19. The Glock 19 weighs 670g unloaded and 855g loaded. The  X26P Taser used by law enforcement weighs 213g unloaded and 338g loaded.

Don’t know the difference between those two weights? Okay, well first pick up this cute little copy of “If You Give A Mouse a Cookie”  (weight ~345 g.)

[IMAGE 3: Picture of “If You Give A Mouse a Cookie”, a popular and very short children’s book]

Now, pick up the 752-page monstrosity that is the entirety of The Divine Comedy (weight ~794)

[IMAGE 4: Picture of a large copy of “The Divine Comedy”)

The weight difference between those is still smaller than the difference between a Glock and a Taser.

Or go pick up 3.4 apples and 8.5 apples. The list goes on. The point is that it takes an extraordinary lack of care and critical thinking to not realize the difference.

And Potter is holding the gun with one fucking hand.

Lesson 4: The Safety

This is maybe the most important part of the whole situation.

[IMAGE 5: A picture from the X26P User Manual, which displays a safety trigger than must be flipped up for the gun to work].

All tasers have a safety. You have to flip it up so you don’t accidentally shoot yourself in the ass. Now, I’ve only ever owned stun guns and never actually used ones, but I do shoot. When I’m shooting say, a shotgun, it’s an automatic instinct to undo the safety before I shoot. Close, shoulder, aim, safety. Fire. Fire. Close, shoulder, aim, safety. Fire. It’s automatic, but at the same time if I went to flip the safety and my finger ran over where the lever should be, I’d be pretty fucking confused.

And I don’t even going shotgun shooting that often!

Now let’s look at a close-up of the triggers of the Glock 17 and the X26P.

[IMAGE 6: A close up image of the Glock 17 trigger, the X26P trigger, and a diagram of the inside of a Glock 17.]

Glock’s don’t have the standard manual thumb safeties that come with other guns. Instead, they have a trigger safety. It’s hard to see in the first image, but there’s actually a second trigger/piece of metal protruding from the center of the trigger. This way you don’t have to deal with a manual trigger, but the gun won’t go off unless you pull directly back on the trigger.

Again, tactile sense. If you’ve trained with a weapon, a musical instrument, a piece of sports equipment, you know that object inside and out. You might be amazing with a tennis racquet, but if your shorter friend hands you her’s it’ll take awhile to get used to.

Now, it could just be that Potter is incredibly fucking stupid. Let me rephrase that: Potter is definitely incredibly fucking stupid. It’s not just the things she didn’t notice; besides her lack of protocol, she holds her gun with one hand. Maybe you can do that easier with a taser, which doesn’t have this nice little thing called “kickback”, but it’s still bad practice. She fires when one of her coworkers is close to Mr. Wright—generally, it’s a bad idea to fire a taser in an enclosed area.

I can’t speak on the sheer malice or racism in Potter’s own views, but I can say this: Potter was no rookie. She had spent 26 years as a police officer. She was training others. She was head of a fucking police union. So even if she is incredibly apologetic and pro-BLM, even if—this is who the policing system puts their trust in. This is the standard you get, after over 2 decades of experience. A mildly confrontational situation, an officer who doesn’t know her fucking weapons, and a man dead, and a child without a father.

Fuck the police. There’s nothing to reform here.              

Body Cam Footage for Screenshots: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdv03O23vRQ

Edit 15/4/2021: mistakenly referred to a taser as a stun gun. In case anyone was wondering, a taser shoots and a stun gun looks more like a cattle prod.

[mor-beck-more-problems]

Drop Dead Goregous || Morgan & Jasmine

TIMING: Current

LOCATION: Downtown

PARTIES: @halequeenjas & @mor-beck-more-problems

SUMMARY: Morgan’s shopping trip gets interrupted by a ghostly visitor, but not the one she expects.

Morgan was shaken by what she’d seen lately. After almost five months dead, she would’ve thought she’d earned some kind of credit against death bullshit, especially ghost bullshit, considering how she’d died. But it never stopped. No matter what she did, no matter how hard she tried, her hundred year old bullshit came up to rip the floor out from under her and she was left to catch her own fall. Letting out another breath she didn’t need, Morgan shuffled around the boutique she was visiting. Fall was coming, and she wanted to give herself a wardrobe upgrade to match her new reputation and her new self. Bye-bye cutesly floral kimonos, at least for now. She picked through the selections, holding up one muted dress after another before she went back to a rack of black dresses and loose sweaters. As she did, she spotted a familiar face nearby, and a sad, scruffy looking ghost-man hovering behind her, way, way too close for politeness. He had a face that insisted it knew more than you and would be happy to explain how in a twelve slide power point or over beers at a local micro-brewery.

Morgan tried to catch the guy’s attention subtly with her eyes, a good ‘I see you, jerkface’ staredown. But aiming for a little eye contact wasn’t doing much. She took one of the dresses she liked and headed for another rack, ready to swing her hanger through him as a warning shot. “Leave her alone, asshat,” she hissed. “Find somewhere else to haunt.” The hanger bopped against his side, the clips on the dress rattled. He was...solid?

After performing an exorcism for a client earlier, Jasmine was worn down and decided a little retail therapy would perk her right back up. At least the person who was possessed was rich so the paycheck was hefty. No reason to not treat herself to a new dress or five. She’d been idly thumbing through a rack of maroon and burnt orange sweater dresses that’d be perfect for the fall, when she heard someone behind her very quietly whisper the word haunt. How had she missed there was a ghost here? She whipped around, instinctively going for the iron rod in her oversized purse. She recognized the other woman, who could clearly also see ghosts, was whacking Larry Bob with a hanger that didn’t go through him. Her breath hitched in her throat as she hoarsely grumbled, “Damn it, Larry.” His eyes were on her iron rod and he was backing away from her slowly. She swung and he just dodged her leaving a slight whooshing sound in the air. Another whack and this time it stung. He was more quick to move now though he seemed disoriented by not being able to phase through walls. This still meant nothing good. “Here,” she said as she tossed a bag of salt at Morgan,“If he comes toward you throw some of that on him.”

The last thing Morgan had expected was for the woman to know she was being haunted in the first place, much less to have something on hand for keeping him back. Was this survival coping in action or were they somehow...friendly? From the way she swore, probably not. But still--what? Morgan was so befuddled she almost dropped the travel size salt bag. She stammered unintelligibly before throwing a small sprinkle of salt Larry’s way. Yep, just as effective as the iron. But it also happened to bounce off him, not through him. “I’m sorry, but you-- you know he’s there? And what he is?” This much was obvious, but she was still trying to process. “Are you...okay? I mean, you seem okay. Very okay, more than, even, it’s just uh, most people wouldn’t with that guy hanging over their shoulder all stalker-like.” From the looks of the woman, she was one of the more okay looking people Morgan had ever met, and familiar too, though she couldn’t match her face in her head yet. And in her uncertainty, she blabbered on until she ran out of breath. “I just thought, well, maybe you didn’t know! So I’d try...something. To help you, I mean. But you do know! So… sorry, I’m Morgan and definitely not this weird all the time. Have we met before maybe? I would love to have made a better first impression on you some other time.”

It was good that the other woman was quick to throw the dash of salt she’d been given as it caused some recoil from Larry Bob. Jasmine gave the woman an approving nod before she lunged forward with her iron rod and whacked Larry on the head with the iron rod. The kickback of it not going through him made her stumble backward slightly, but he seemed about done with trying to attack him. A nice dose of salt and iron usually made him fuck off for a little while. Her hair was now disheveled as she turned back to Morgan. Normally, she would have not advertised she could see ghosts, but it was clear this was an ability they shared. She let out a dramatic sigh as she responded, “Yeah, he’s a ghost… a poltergeist more specifically. Which I know because I can see ghosts and obviously so can you.” This woman was definitely a little spazzy and caught off guard by the fact Jasmine knew what she was doing. Admittedly, she knew she didn’t look like she could hold her own in a fight, but to be fair, neither did the pint-sized woman who was originally wielding a hanger. “That’s a logical thing to think. Most people don’t know. I just happen to be an exorcist with a poltergeist because a certain someone doesn’t realize trying to make my life hell doesn’t make his sad excuse of a life any more impressive.” The last part she said pointedly even though Larry had faded away. At the mention of hoping she made a better first impression, Jasmine piped in, “We have met. At Bea’s party. Your first impression was good, not that this one was like bad or anything either. I mean, you tried to fight a ghost for me.”

“A POLTER--” Morgan covered her mouth before she drew the attention of the whole store. The young woman, Jasmine, she remembered now, was being remarkably chill about this, and if she wasn’t freaking out about her poltergeist stalker then why was Morgan having a fit about it in public? Sure, she’d been killed by a ghost before, but Larry over there didn’t look murderous so much as just...douchey. But as Jasmine went on, more pieces started to fall together. Morgan had to admit, she didn’t realize exorcists could look like Jasmine: indulgently polished, young, flippantly bold. But then she’d only really met Rebecca before, so who was she to be surprised? “That’s pretty impressive,” she said, gathering herself. “I wish I’d known when we first met, but I guess I should know by now that any friend of Bea’s is bound to be spooky or magical somehow. You’re Jasmine, right? You must’ve been at this awhile to be so chill about a tag-along like...Larry. And I...guess I did try to fight thim, huh? I’m kind of um…” She struggled to find a polite euphemism for what she was, ultimately settling on, “Dead. Almost five months now as it happens. So there’s not much they can really do to get to me.”

Thankfully, Morgan covered her own mouth before Jasmine had to. The last thing she needed was someone hearing them and thinking she was crazy. Especially not the shop owner. This was the best place in town to find high end business professional clothing. “Yes,” she said in a hushed tone, “A poltergeist. Which I know is bad. Like really bad and I’m working on it.” While she couldn’t say Morgan was wrong, she knew she was impressive for a multitude of reasons, she was still more curious about how Morgan could see the ghost and how he somehow became solid. The solid part was arguably more concerning, but hey, it was a little more satisfying to hit him and have it land for real. “That’s me. It’s Morgan, right? I guess I have been. My aunt taught me how to do exorcisms when I was around 19. Plus, pretty used to this particular ghost. Trying to get rid of him, but turns out he may be a two woman job,” she explained. As Morgan explained why she could see ghosts, Jasmine’s jaw quite literally dropped. Dead? Sure, she was pasty, but she just chalked that up to needing a good dose of Vitamin D. The only dead person she’d known was dead prior to this had just been Bea. “Huh,” she mused out loud, “I didn’t realize that was a thing, but hey, for being dead you sure are pretty. Good nothing to get to you though.” In a more hushed tone she asked, “So like are you a vampire or something? I don’t really know much outside of ghosts.”

Morgan was relieved more than anything to see Jasmine at least a little concerned about the polter. Although the idea that they took a long time to ‘work on’ was kind of distressing, given the state of her own personal demon girl. “Are those..um…?” Morgan squeaked. “Do they usually take...a lot of working on? Is that a thing?” She looked over her shoulder uncertainly at where Larry had just been. Maybe this wasn’t really the time. They were in public, after all. She smirked at Jasmine’s compliment and tossed her hair back, smirking, only a little shrill as her unease rolled off and away from her. “What can I say, it’s hard to keep a good girl down.” She smiled warmly at the question, appreciating the tact and concern. “You’re close, but I like brains better than blood,” she said. “It’s not as bad as the movies make it out to be. I mean, the Dawn of the Dead never looked this cute, right? Oh, and before you ask, it’s only been five months. I’m not like, a hundred or anything. But I will look just this good when I am, apparently.”

Jasmine frowned slightly at the question mostly because she hated the answer. Normally, poltergeists were easy enough to remove with an exorcism. Sure, performing an exorcism was physically exhausting and sometimes she ended up with some cuts along the way, but prior to Larry Bob they had always ended with there no longer being a ghost. “No, she answered with a hint of an edge in her voice, “He’s the only poltergeist I’ve had a particularly difficult time getting rid of.” Thankfully, Tiffany seemed to be too preoccupied with her phone to bother paying attention to what was going on around the shop. No one paying attention to them or what happened with Larry Bob was a good thing and meant her reputation was still intact. She hated online shopping and didn’t want to have to drive too far out of town to get nice clothes. Her face brightened as Morgan joked and she laughed in response. “Does that mean you have brains and beauty?” It was easier to joke than to acknowledge that she was a bit alarmed. Bea being back from the dead had thrown her for enough of a loop. Ghosts were one thing, but weren’t zombies and vampires supposed to be all grr? That was a bit out of her wheelhouse though she trusted any friend of Bea’s wasn’t going to hurt her. “Dawn of the Dead’s got nothing on you, that’s for damn sure. That’s a pretty big change, but hey, you’ve got eternal hotness going for you, so congratulations to you on that one.” She wasn’t sure if being new to the whole zombie thing was more or less comforting. She blurted out, “So… brains, huh?”

“Oh!” Morgan’s voice came out as a bright pop and she wasn’t sure whether to feel guilty about it or not. She didn’t care about whether Constance was a poltergeist or not, she just wanted her to leave and suffer. But she also wanted her friends to get out of this unscathed. No more hospitals, no more tears, no more hurt, no more staring at death through the eyes of an angry, pimpled face. It was good to know that if Constance snapped, she would still be easy to crush. “I was just curious,” she added, a little awkwardly. “I have a uh, not quite polter problem too, and I was just, you know, wondering. For obvious reasons. Not really into the ‘collateral damage’ scene. Been there, done that!” She laughed, but it came out a little hollow and shrill. Nell and Taki had been hurt because of Constance. Deirdre had been hurt because of Constance. Blanche had been hurt tracking her down. If Constance decided that she needed to go after anyone besides Deirdre-- Morgan didn’t want to think about it. She had enough reasons to take the ghost apart piece by piece. It was much, much nicer talking about how attractive they both were, and so much easier for making friends. At least Jasmine knew how to take care of herself around a spirit. Morgan wouldn’t be endangering her too much if they hit it off.

“Thank you! It is really nice looking this great without embalming, even with the brains and all. That part’s super real, but a little snack of preserved eyeballs and organs? Also good. I’m just kinda sad I’m never gonna know if I looked hot with gray hairs, you know? But you are kind of extraordinary to look at, if that’s not too weird to say. I’m, you know, I have a girlfriend. But like, that manicure! It’s gorgeous. I’m always so worried my hands are gonna freak people out if they have to touch them.” As she said this, she realized her hand was already held out to shake and--yikes. Too much. Morgan pulled her hand away, smiling apologetically. “I’m sorry, for crashing your shopping trip. If you’re anything like the other exorcists I’ve known, you definitely deserve some TLC. Um, that dress really does look pretty, by the way. I hope you get it.”

At the mention of having some degree of a ghost problem, Jasmine straightened up a little bit. To a degree, she hated all of this. Exorcisms were draining. Seeing dead people got exhausting. None of it was quite how she used to envision her life, but she couldn’t just sit here with these powers and ignore her calling. What she knew for sure was that she definitely deserved the new pair of shoes she was getting to go with her new dress. “A not quite polter problem,” she said slowly just to make sure she heard right, “Is this something you’d let me check out? This ghost may not want to show their face to an exorcist, but I do know a few spellcasters who could probably summon them.” To lighten the mood a bit, she added, “Since you’re a friend of Bea’s, I’ll even give you a friends and family discount.” At least not quite a poltergeist could mean slightly less complex. It still left an uneasy feeling within her that she opted to ignore for the time being until Morgan opted to give her more information.

This part of the conversation was easier and involved a lot less potential danger. Morgan didn’t seem like she was jonesing for her brains though the thought did cross her mind. Jasmine lit up a bit and added, “Well, you’re definitely the prettiest dead girl I’ve ever seen… and trust me, I’ve seen a lot. Also, eh, I’ll let you keep those snacks to yourself. Not really up my alley personally, but like, different nutritional needs I’m sure.” Eyeballs and brains still had a major ick factor though. God, when she died, she just wanted to stay dead and hopefully that would be a very long time from now. That thought quickly faded as Morgan began complimenting her. With a flip of her hair, she responded, “You know, hair dye does exist, but thank you. I can’t help but agree with you.” She looked down to the dress. “You think so,” she asked, “Red is usually more my color but this shade of burnt orange is perfect for fall.” She laughed a bit, “Don’t worry, didn’t think you were trying to hit on me. I could totally do your nails though. My dad grounded me for like six months my junior year of high school, so I got pretty good at doing them myself. Trust me, it takes a lot more than cold hands to freak me out.” An uncertainty she felt about the whole zombie thing was quickly fading. Morgan was fun and seemingly sweet. Once they got rid of her ghost, it’d be all good times.

Morgan waved away Jasmine’s concern, covering her uneasy laugh with a smile. “I’m getting it figured out, no worries. It’s not like she follows me around all the time.” Just some spontaneous attempted murder. Just girl stuff. “But, you know, anything goes south and you’ll be my first call.” So far, exorcisms ‘to the pain’ were a little hard to come by, and there wasn’t much of a roadmap for finding the worst of the worst either. As plausible as it seemed that Jasmine would have some idea, she couldn’t risk her going out and getting rid of Constance the easy way behind her back. They’d only just met, Jasmine had no reason to trust her sob story. Maybe later, when Morgan wasn’t just some rando to her, she’d explain it better. “‘Sides, maybe by then we’ll be friends too, no middle gal, however truly exceptional she might be.” Morgan smiled with relief as Jasmine took everything in stride. “I am no stranger to red,” she said, gesturing down to her own tunic cardigan, slumping artfully off one shoulder. “But orange is just so… I mean it just screams October and pumpkin spice, right?” Her smile widened as she went on. “That would be amazing! You know, I’ve never gotten the knack of doing my own nails, I don’t know if it’s a left handed thing or what, but it never comes out right. And come to think of it, I’m sure you have lots of stories, especially if you’ve been in town your whole life. Um, whenever you’re free, we should--I don’t know, do nails. Or hair. Something nice in all this White Crest--” she waved her fingers vaguely, “Nonsense. And we can bring salt! It might be nice to get to know one another without ghostly plus ones, right?”

Jasmine tilted her head not quite believing that statement, but she had to trust Morgan would come to her if things got too heated. It wasn’t as if she could go out looking for this ghost with so little information. “Good, please do keep me posted if anything escalates. The longer she sticks around, the worse she’ll get,” she explained and hoped the situation was given the proper attention. Since really learning about her powers and what she was capable of, she felt a sense of duty to keep people safe from bad ghosts. Jasmine doubted she was the only exorcist in town. As long as it was being handled, that was what mattered, so she laughed and agreed, “You know, I think we can work on that. Being friends without the stunning middle woman.” As Morgan gestured at her tunic, Jas added, “Which I do love on you, really brings out your eyes, but you’re right. It’s pumpkin spice season, why not dress like what everyone is craving… well, you know besides me.” The last part came off almost joking, but she definitely believed it to be true. She was funny, gorgeous, wealthy, and happened to save people from ghosts on the side. What was there not to love? “I’m getting it,” she exclaimed before excitedly adding, “Oh, you’re definitely coming over to my place for a proper manicure and most likely some wine. My hot tub is, like, super nice, too. Also, my home is ghost free due to some handy wards and tons of salt so no unwanted plus ones. If you couldn’t tell by my resounding agreement, I’d love to get to know you better and become actual friends. Especially if I get to paint your nails. Makeovers are kind of my thing.” Somehow, Morgan’s energy was a bit contagious. She never thought she’d be making friends with a zombie, but hey, she was solid and didn’t haunt people so who was she to judge? She had a feeling they’d be fast friends.

[forkanna]

[AO3 LINK]

See also: @pankite

'That was too close.'

Anna inwardly cursed herself for being so dumb. She shouldn't have even attempted a quickie in the bathroom but she couldn't resist. After almost two weeks of enduring the onslaught of sexual frustration and confusion, having Elsa so close this morning, she could no longer hold out. Then she was in such a rush that she forgot to even wash her hands and then…

'I almost held her hand with the one I touched myself with! And why didn't I wash my hand again? Just because I had already been in there so long… or was the reason that I wanted Elsa to feel it? That's messed up, even for you, Anna.'

"Don't forget," Elsa was saying some several meters away, hands in the small of her back as she walked behind the row of little archers. "Aim slightly above your target!"

Still Anna couldn't deny that the rush of heat she had felt when she first realized her mistake was intoxicating. When Elsa's hand brushed over her own damp one and those gorgeous eyes looked over at her curiously… Anna bit back a sigh, scrubbed the last remnants from her hand on her shorts, and instead walked over to help one of the kids fix her posture. That look had been sinful, and now that Anna knew that she might just have a chance, well… that just made the whole situation even more arousing.

"Like this?" the girl asked, taking aim again with her tongue between her teeth, as if it would help her concentrate.

"That's it, Wendy," Anna smiled brightly at the girl, "Now let it loose!" Wendy did as she was told, her ringlets bouncing from the kickback of the bow. She jumped up and down excitedly when she saw the results of her effort.

"I hit it, I hit it!"

"Good job, Wendy!" Anna praised the girl and gave her a swift hug in congratulations. "That was a wicked shot! Look how close it is to the center!"

As Wendy turned and clapped her hands, cheeks bunching with glee, Elsa walked past and said, "Agreed; very good, very good. Anna, you're a quick study. I didn't think you knew archery before."

"Maybe I'm just a natural like Wendy is?" Anna grinned at her sister and gave Wendy's head a pat, encouraging the young girl to start aiming again. "You seem to know what you're doing, too."

"Thank you," Wendy whispered quietly, giving a polite little bow. After she returned to attempt another shot, Elsa did not move off to the other campers again.

"Anna?"

Anna tried to ignore the shiver that crept up her spine at the way Elsa said her name. "What's up?" she asked with a slightly forced chirp added to her tone. "Need something?"

"This… might seem silly," she began in a shy mutter, trying to maintain a passive facade despite her cheeks beginning to glow. "But I realised that we haven't been eating together during lunch. How… how would you feel about… trying that?"

Her heart quickened its pace at the suggestion. "Uh, yeah! I would love to eat with you, Elsa!" She smiled brightly and gave her older sister a pat on the arm. "How about we eat under that nice tree outside the cafeteria?"

"Sure! I didn't even think about eating outside," she added with a chuckle. "That sounds wonderful. So…" Without following up on that word, she smiled giddily and tromped off to help another camper with their archery.

Anna smiled after her, long after Elsa's back was turned, physically unable to stop even after she went back to her own set of kids. Olaf said nothing as she helped him but his dark eyes had a knowing gleam and his grin was just the taddest bit smug. It made Anna's cheeks burn.

"Olaf, stop staring at me like that and shoot!" Even the bite of her words were lessened by the ever persistent smile.

"Okay, Miss Anna," he chuckled, raising his bow. But the smile lingered.

                                                            ~ o ~

Anna leaned against the door leading outdoors, balancing a tray in her hands as she patiently waited for Elsa to meet her. She didn't really know why she felt nervous, considering she and Elsa had done so much together alone already, but still her stomach fluttered with butterflies and she tapped her foot in a restless beat.

"Hey," the blonde said in a soft voice as she appeared with her own food, poised and elegant despite the very slight pinkness in her cheeks. "Sorry about the wait, Aurora had a question."

"No problem," Anna perked up, "Probably wondering why you aren't sitting with them today, huh?"

"Mostly that, yeah. Shall we?"

Once outside, they made their way quickly to the aforementioned tree. Its high branches provided ample shade from the noonday sun, and they quickly sat themselves down between two of the large roots, careful to balance their trays and avoid spilling anything.

"So, how well do you know the other girls, Elsa?" Anna asked as she took a bite of the meal for the day. She hummed in appreciation of the surprisingly good burger, downing it with a quick sip of chocolate milk. "I mean, you sit with them sometimes and you get along with them, so you must all be pretty good friends after all these years coming here together, right?"

"Not as much as you would think," she sighed with a french fry halfway to her mouth. "We get along well enough, but… it's more like classmates who are forced to do a group project with you, I guess. I don't talk to them much during downtime."

"Oh…" Anna frowned at that and tilted her head, "Well at least they aren't mean to you… or making you do all the work." She forced a soft chuckle. "How about back home? I mean, I told you all about Kristoff but you haven't told me anything about your friends."

Still chewing, Elsa shrugged a shoulder. "I had a couple of friends in high school, but we lost touch. Haven't… made any lasting friendships in college. I don't know why. Maybe there isn't a reason."

"That's a little sad." The redhead gave Elsa a long look. "Don't you get lonely?"

"Of course. But I have books, and… and Mother." But saying this last made her sigh, so she straightened and smiled over at Anna. "And you, now. I think that's important."

With a soft smile, Anna reached over and hugged Elsa tightly. "Yeah, you have me," she said, nuzzling Elsa's shoulder. "If you ever get lonely, no matter what time or anything, just give me a call, okay? Even if you just want to talk about your day or something, I'll be there for you."

"The same offer goes for you, little sister." As her hand rubbed up and down Anna's back, she slowly began to lean in more, to nuzzle Anna's neck. Finally, she ended up whispering, "I really missed this more than I thought I did. It's… almost criminal how much."

"I missed this, too." Anna ran her fingers through the beautiful platinum hair as it tickled her neck, fighting back the urge to shiver. She breathed in the soothing scent and relished the feeling of being completely relaxed in her sister's arms. If Anna had her way, she would never let her sister go again. "I love you so much, Elsa.""

Elsa's breath was becoming more shallow as she whispered, "I love you, too." Then she cleared her throat and began, "Can… I ask… no, nevermind. I shouldn't."

"It's okay," Anna reassured with a pleasant scratch at Elsa's scalp. It felt nice, and she relaxed the barest amount. "Ask me anything, I won't judge you. Promise."

"Alright. I wanted to ask…" Her shoulders rose and fell, seeming to apologise in advance for what she was about to say. "Not that I know much about it, but did you… abuse yourself?"

Anna paused in her ministrations, furrowing her brow at the question. "What do you mean? Like… cutting?" she asked.

"Cutting?" Then Elsa gasped softly. "O-oh! I didn't mean- sorry, that wasn't what I meant. Though I hope you don't do that, and if you do, we should talk about it." Clearing her throat to try again, and perhaps to excuse the way her face was growing redder, she whispered, "I meant, um… sexually. With your hand?"

Anna fixed her sister with a blank stare. After a second, she caught on, but almost had to laugh at the phrasing. "Elsa, how is masturbating 'abusing myself'?" the redhead asked, raising an eyebrow. "It's a natural thing, not abusive in the slightest."

"Well, it… I don't know, that's what Mama calls it." Clearly, she was twice as embarrassed as she had been moments before, and she looked away, unable to meet her sister's gaze anymore.

"She would call it that," Anna sighed. "Um… yeah, I do. N-Not often, mind you, but sometimes if… the 'itch' gets to be too much. Have- um, do you?"

That seemed to catch the taller girl by surprise. "Of course not! I'm not a… oh, sorry," she ended up whispering. "I didn't mean to imply there's… of course if you do it, I- well, I'm sorry for being so, um…" She never did finish her sentence, merely let it falter and die.

"I get it," Anna let out a soft chuckle and patted her sister's head. "You're still an innocent lamb and I'm the bad wolf who's done all the naughty things; no need to apologise to me for stating it." She laughed fully this time. "Geez, and they call me Tomato Head; your face can rival my hair right now."

"Shut up!" Her smile was awkward and uncertain, but she still smiled in spite of herself and her evident discomfort with the subject matter. The smile faded as she asked, "So… you really did? This morning?"

It was Anna's turn to blush intensely. That's why they were discussing this. While Anna really hadn't done as much as she could to hide it, she didn't know she was obvious enough for Elsa to have caught onto her little stunt in the washroom. She swallowed thickly, her mouth feeling dry. "W-What makes you think that?" She knew the sentence would make her sound guiltier than even the no-doubt guilty look on her face did, but it slipped out regardless.

However, it seemed Elsa was in a mood to be kind. She simply answered straightforward, "Your nervousness, and your… hand. I mean, I didn't want to walk around assuming that was it, I… that didn't seem fair. So I asked. I'm sorry if that's private and, um, you didn't want to tell me."

"It's okay," Anna said, averting her gaze in embarrassment. "It was dumb of me either way. I just… my needs built up a little too much." The last part came out in a rushed, single breath as she started to ramble, "A-and I mean, usually I can control myself but it was really hard to do that this morning and-" The words kept coming, getting faster the more Anna went on.

"Anna, y-you don't have to explain!" Elsa cut her off hastily, cheeks on fire. "I'm sorry, this is my fault, isn't it? For not… being able to resist kissing you. Maybe. I don't know."

"It's not your fault! I shouldn't act like a horny teenager whenever I'm around you in the first place! I-I'm so sorry, I'm usually so much better about this, I promise!"

After being quiet for a moment, Elsa let a small, uncertain chuckle out before saying, "You are a horny teenager, Anna. The actual definition of one." Then she sighed. "What are we doing, exactly?"

"What do you mean?" Anna tilted her head in confusion at the question, "We're talking and sharing a meal together, aren't we?"

"Yes," she giggled, though still looking flushed and uncertain. "I meant… everything. I like it. Maybe too much. Is it alright that I enjoy kissing you? That… I don't feel disgusted about what you did this morning, even though I know God probably would be? Or would he? I'm just very confused, and I… I want to sort through things with you, because it's too important for me to isolate myself from you again."

"Oh, Elsa." Anna reached out and took her sister's hand. She couldn't stand seeing the conflicting emotions in Elsa's bright eyes. "We'll get through this together, I promise. We'll sort everything out and… figure out exactly where we stand with each other." She brushed some platinum strands away from Elsa's face and smiled as reassuringly as she could. "Everything will be okay."

"Good," she sighed, letting her eyes close for a brief moment. When she opened them again, she was smiling, nervous as the smile was. "Now that we have that settled… I have another question. When you did that this morning, was… it for any particular reason?"

Anna blushed when she realized that Elsa wasn't quite ready to drop the topic of her episode just yet. She really couldn't blame her; after being raised by their mother and told that masturbating was "abusive" to the body, Anna guessed that the poor repressed girl just wanted to be properly educated on the topic. "Besides the fact that I was horny? N-not really."

"Well… I didn't even know for sure that girls did that," she confessed in a pitiful voice, obviously trying not to make too big of a deal about how ignorant she felt. "Do… you…" She laughed nervously before forcing herself to continue. "Do you get horny very often?"

"About as much as a lot of other girls, I think." Anna gave Elsa a sympathetic grin and patted her hands. "It's not… a daily thing, I mean, but about… somewhere between once and a few times a week, I decide to treat myself. Or just do it to relieve stress. Whatever."

Her blush deepened at the thought of sharing her self-pleasuring habits with her sister. It seemed to catch her off guard, because the blonde cleared her throat and looked away. "Wow. I just… that's a hundred per cent more often than I do it. But then again, I'm probably not normal." She looked toward her food and took up her chocolate milk to distract herself from the topic. "Things like that have always made me… not scared, exactly. Uncomfortable, maybe?"

"It's - uh - understandable why, Elsa," Anna reassured the elder awkwardly, gesturing with her hands. "After being raised with our mom. Besides, I mean, not all girls… do it, y'know? It's perfectly normal to refrain from it. I just… like the feeling, and it helps me relax so… yeah…"

By that point, Anna vaguely wished that the grass would open up and swallow her whole. But Elsa only set her tray aside and put a hand on Anna's leg. It was a lot more intimate than any other gesture she had made before, even though the hand didn't move or otherwise tease her further.

"Then you can do it whenever you need to. And… and if you want to use the bed, just let me know, and I'll make myself scarce. Does… that sound fair?"

"I don't want to kick you out of the room just because I have urges!" Anna told her with a shake of her head. "No, I've held off on that particular activity before and I can do it again, Elsa; I'm sorry I gave in this time."

"You couldn't hold off this morning," she teased back. Then she grew thoughtful, staring off into space. "I wonder why… I didn't notice you acting like that before. But then again, maybe I just wasn't paying close enough attention. Either way, I don't want you to have to stop. Isn't this a good thing? You having a bunkmate who won't tell you to stop, o-or report you or anything?"

Elsa's tone was pleading and optimistic; clearly, she thought she was doing something really important for Anna. She shed her embarrassment in the wake of the realization of why Elsa was insisting on this. With a stern frown, she gently took Elsa's hand in here and looked deep into her sister's eyes.

"Elsa. I am not going to do something if it makes you uncomfortable, alright? Your comfort and ease matters much more to me than a few minutes of pleasure."

The clear blue eyes looked right back into hers, and she reached up to cup Anna's cheek as she smiled, clearly more at ease. "Alright. But I want you to give it more thought than that. Honestly, it won't make me uncomfortable at all if I'm not in the same room when it happens! And… I think having discussed it is… better than not knowing, since finding out by walking in on you wouldn't be as easy to accept."

Anna tilted her head into Elsa's palm, letting the stern face melt into a smile that matched her sister's. "It's fine, really," she reassured her, and laughed at just how absurd the entire argument had become. "Man, we're such dorks!"

"We are," she chuckled, going for her tray to resume eating now that they had talked through the pressing matter. "But at least we're dorks who are together again."

"Yeah." Anna's smile turned dreamy as the statement sank in. They were together again… after five years apart, and Anna hoped more than anything that they would never be separated again no matter the circumstances that faced them in the future.

"I wouldn't want to be a dork forever with anyone else!" She threw her arms around the blonde, snuggling into her affectionately and heedless to the fact that she had tipped her own tray as a result of the action.

"Anna, your milk!" But it was too late to save the carton.

                                                        To Be Continued...

[lesserplaces]

Arizona’s Unit 24b is a brutal, nasty place.

Consisting almost entirely of the Superstition Wilderness, 24b is big enough and roadless enough that it’s core is seldom visited. Trails that look clear on maps are actually “trails,” canyons appear from nowhere, and springs run when they feel like it. Life is hard here.

In other words, 24b is perfect. A perfect, joyous unit where you can go days in the middle of deer season without seeing a single other person. A place where there are no tree stands, no warm nights at the hunting lodge, and no water you didn’t drag in yourself. A place where you have to earn your hunt.

Coues deer are the primary target here. They are small and gray with unnaturally good eyesight and an unbelievable ability to avoid ridgelines. They are ghosts. You are going to need good binoculars to find them. Enter the Vortex Talon HD.

TL;DR

WHAT IS IT? Vortex Talon HD 10×42 Binoculars

HOW LONG HAVE YOU OWNED IT? Six months

HOW MUCH DOES IT COST? Around $400

PROS? Razor sharp center, closed bridge design, wide field of view, excellent color fidelity

CONS? Heavy, noticeable sharpness drop off near the edges

WHO SHOULD BUY IT? People who want excellent glass without breaking the bank, people who love closed bridge designs

WHO SHOULDN’T BUYT IT? People who have more money than common sense, people who really want a 15x binocular

DID SOMEONE GIVE IT TO YOU FOR FREE? No, I bought these binoculars with my own money. This post does contain affiliate links, however, which do provide a small kickback to us if you purchase through them at no additional cost to you.

The Vortex Talon HDs are the last of a dying breed. To make an absurd oversimplification, there are essentially two ways to design a set of binoculars: open or closed bridge. Open bridge binoculars are what you are used to seeing every day, with a single central hinge connected to the focus knob. Closed bridge binoculars have two sets of hinges, one on the back and one on the front. This makes closed bridge systems stronger at the cost of being longer and slightly heavier.

Make that longer, slightly heavier, and less sexy. Unfortunately closed bridge systems just look a little clunky relative to their open bridge brethren. I’m sure somewhere there is a grumpy old man screaming about how looks shouldn’t matter when you are in the field, but the fact of the matter is that no one wants to look like a goob. Paired with the fact that some people find open bridge designs more comfortable to hold, this has led closed bridge systems to go the way of the dodo (Editor’s note- to that point, technically this model has been discontinued by Vortex, though they are still available from many sources such as Amazon).

And that is a shame because closed bridge systems also have an incredible advantage to those who glass from a tripod. When a tripod adapter is attached to a pair of binoculars, it (generally speaking) screws in at the bridge. In open bridge systems, this single bridge is centrally located, which means that the stalk of the tripod will be directly in line with the center of the binoculars, with the eye pieces fairly close behind. On the other hand, in closed bridge systems the attachment point is on the front bridge, which has the effect of moving the eyepieces back toward you, the user. This means less leaning forward and more breathing room between your face and the tripod stalk, both huge positives when you are going to be glassing all day.

Onto the glass itself, the Talon HDs are better than anything in this price range has any business being. They are very sharp in the center with a reasonably large sweet spot and spotless color rendition. I have not not noticed any chromatic aberrations to speak of. As you would expect, the tubes are argon purged, the glass is high dispersion, and the lenses are fully coated.

If you made me pick nits, I’d say that the focus throw is far too slow (a full 540 degrees from close to infinity) and that the sharpness drop off near the edges is noticeable. The focus throw problem is a cheap, easy fix that Vortex should be sure to resolve if these binoculars are every redesigned. The sharpness drop off is probably something you will have to live with unless you want to spend thousands and thousands of dollars on binoculars.

It is also worth noting that the Talon HDs do not come in higher magnifications, such as the increasingly popular 15x. While 15x binoculars certainly have their place, I’ve always found their field of view too small and their mass too great for the type of light and fast backpack hunting I prefer. When I’m going to spend a week in the backcountry hunting in diverse conditions, from dense canyon bottoms to long open ridge lines, a single versatile solution is the only real option. 10x42s are hard to beat in this regard.

COMPARED TO THE COMPETITION

TALON HD vs. VIPER HD

Vortex’s main alternative in this price range is their classic open bridge Viper HD. I have a few years of experience behind these, as they were my go to pair of binoculars before an unfortunate house robbery removed them from service. On paper, the Viper’s have a lot going for them. First of all, they are lighter, nearly two ounces lighter. Now, two ounces might not seem like much, but when they are slung around your neck all day, ounces add up. Second, the Viper’s are a little sharper, especially around the edges. Lastly, eye relief is just a touch longer and the close focus distance is just a little bit shorter.

So why not just buy the Viper HDs then? Most important to us normal folks, though prices vary a little day to day, the Viper HDs have historically been about 25% more expensive than the Talon HDs. 25% is a lot! Second, though the Viper HDs are a little sharper around the edges, they also have a slightly narrower field of view. To me, any reasonable tradeoff between field of view and edge sharpness is a good one– better to have the subject in frame than miss the subject entirely.

Some reviewers have made a big deal out of the fact that the Viper HD frames are made of polycarbonate while the Talon HD frames are made of magnesium. Ignore these people. Modern plastics are excellent, and you almost certainly would do irrevocable damage to the optics long before you break the frames of either.

Last, but certainly not least, is the fact that the Talon HDs are a closed bridge design while the Viper HDs are a open bridge design. I spend most of my glassing time behind a tripod, and as discussed above, I am in favor of literally anything that moves the eyepieces of my binoculars away from the tripod stalk. Closed bridges are not as sexy as open bridges, but they just work better for the type of glassing I do.

TALON HD vs DIAMONDBACK 

When you forget your adapter you have to adapt

On our most recent coues deer hunt, I got the chance to spend a ton of time behind Curry’s pair of Diamondback 10×42. For the price, around $200 (half of the Talon HDs), I was impressed. The Diamondbakcs are a reasonably sharp, well built pair of binoculars that any beginning hunter would be happy with for a long time. The fact that, through the magic of globalization, you can buy glass this good this cheap is a wonder in and of itself. We are a spoiled bunch, modern hunters.

That being said, going to the Diamondbacks is a significant step down in quality from the Talon HDs. The Diamondbacks are not HD glass, and it shows. While sharpness isn’t bad color fidelity is a problem, with everything taking on a slightly warm hew. Colors matter, especially when trying to differentiate between a grayish coues deer and a slightly less grayish bush from hundreds of yards away. If you can afford to jump to the next price level, do. If you can’t, buy the Diamondbacks and give them to your kid when you have the money and need an excuse to upgrade.

What does it take to hunt a place like this?

Patience mostly.

Well, patience and reliable gear that does everything well. Yes, in a perfect world, you would have a few different pairs of binoculars with you, covering all the magnifications from 8x to 15x. But this isn’t that world. When you are going to be carrying everything you need on your back for days on end, you will need to pick one set of binoculars that are durable, optically excellent, and comfortable to use.

The Talon HDs are just that. Light enough to carry, sharp enough to use, and with a comfortable closed bridge design to boot, the Talon HDs have already become one of my most beloved pieces of gear. They get used. They get used all the time. I can think of no better endorsement than that.

You can follow Lesser Places by email, or on Twitter, Tumblr, and Instagram using the menu at the top of the page. Or, you could click the links below to share with your friends directly. Or, copy and paste the URL someplace you think people will find it useful. Or, print the story, place it in a nice envelope, and send it to one of your friends. Basically we support any way you want to share.  No, we aren’t above begging.

Max Wilson is a graduate student studying ecology at Arizona State University. He writes here at Lesser Places, occasionally for Backpacker.com, and even more occasionally for scientific journals. You can follow him on twitter @maxomillions.

  Vortex Talon HD 10×42 Review Arizona's Unit 24b is a brutal, nasty place. Consisting almost entirely of the Superstition Wilderness, 24b is big enough and roadless enough that it's core is seldom visited.

[rubenesque-as-fuck]

Woo did at least one productive thing today and finished submitting my taxes