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#mostly the addition bores me. but also it doesn't make me Comfortable ig
callixton
·
4 months
Text
i genuinely don't know what changed where i experience active romance repulsion so much now but like. goddamn that shit is not for me. good to know! important to know these things about yourself!
#like i'm genuinely happy for my friends who r in relationships and it makes me happy to be around them
#but that's bc it's their business and desires etc
#i don't even super like reading romance anymore. not that it was ever a big category for me but like. i saw the appeal
#it's not that reading or watching it makes me actively uncomfortable so much as i prefer basically every other close relationship dynamic
#mostly the addition bores me. but also it doesn't make me Comfortable ig
#and my ex has been really great about wanting to be careful w how he describes us and talks to me as we've been figuring things out
#but sometimes even he says something that reads a little too romantic to me and it sets stuff off. which is Fine it's not his problem
#he's being super great abt it and we communicate about everything
#and it's not a complete 180 either i wasn't a fan of romance stuff before i just do not want it near me at All anymore
#anyway. those r my bi-monthly aro ramblings.
#maybe the repulsion piece will change at some point! but also i look back at my life and how frequently i said i didn't want a relationship
#- growing up and how i was like. made to believe by society if not the people close to me that that wasn't true. and that i still have
#- the same response now as i did in 7th grade and starting college. so
#i just get SUCH bad crushes which is a stupid affliction to have at the same time. i literally want. so bad. that's it tho!
#ted talks
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